manifesting i get worse

a bad hair day will have you saying shit like it's so over for me

i need (abruptly stops talking & stares at some random fixed point with a vacant expression)

you are not immune to inventing an arbitrary set of rules that only you have to adhere to

ran out of things to run to or away from. what now

the irredeemable pervert is generally well regarded among their friends for their insightful thoughts and all around pleasant demeanour

I'll be an avid shipper of something until someone walks in and says "there is NO platonic explanation for this" and suddenly I've never shipped it before in my life and they're just friends and I can't lie i can't really see them being in a romantic relationship with each other yeah sorry I just don't see it

washing dishes is evil because you go "oh fuck there's so many dishes this is gonna take foreverrr" and then you enter the dish abyss and emerge with your abdomen somehow covered in water and your hands all wrinky and then you look at the clock and what felt like half an hour was actually 10 minutes

its interesting how the people who say "my trauma made me funny" are never actually funny just uncomfortably self-deprecating

age regressing to 2 years old but i was an especially erudite and articulate baby so you don't even notice

i have this deadly sickness called remembering