Music To My Dick @bollockingwankshite - Tumblr Blog

Cate Blanchett: I can’t believe I will be playing another lesbian character.

Ocean’s 8 director: You’re not.

Cate Blanchett: No, I’m gonna.

#my acting career #me @ the play I'm in atm #director: there's no concrete evidence that Emily Brontë was gay #me: yeah but like it or not you wrote her gay and also I'm making it gayer

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yesterdaysprint

New-York Tribune, New York, December 17, 1916

#KWEEN #me trying to balance my Victorian aesthetic with my slutty aesthetic

Watching Unbelievable

Feminist brain: the relationship between Rasmussen and Duvall is a great example of a positive female friendship-

Lesbian Monkey Brain: when are they gonna KISS

AND WHY IS HE USING A GMAIL ACCOUNT

#look the book is actually pretty good #but this guy is a significantly bigger deal than I'd expected #yikes @ my shitty editing and the fact that my delivery is super late lmao

I also hate that when you google his name, Richard Branson is the first person who pops up under 'people also search for'

#enjoy my shitty American accent lmao #wait I just found a video of him and he has a British accent #maybe he won't notice

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Me: *casually googles the author of the book I've nearly finished editing*

Google: net worth £10 million

I-

#really should have stayed firm on my rate #why the fuck this dude scouting his audiobook narrators on Fiverr

OK w h y are all of my social media accounts suddenly compromised

#I swear the past week or so has just been changing my damn passwords every few days

Fantastic. Finally get a quiet day to record the rest of this audiobook, fire up my laptop and it's rattling. Which according to Google means the fan needs replacing. Which I can't afford right now, but the rattling will absolutely disrupt the audio

#and also my laptop might die #so basically fuck my drag #uGh I have the next two days to get this book done please

Hi it's 2019 and I'm still obsessed with that video of Nina Hartley sticking her tongue in Kate McKinnon's ear

#Nina Hartley taught me how to eat pussy so it all feels very apt #not in person alas but

books-in-order

Service dogs training to sit through a movie at a theater.

driftwooddragons

It’s actually better than that - the picture comes from dogs being trained to sit through a PLAY… which means there are actors on the stage performing a musical for a theatre full of dogs.

alexseanchai

[image: several rows of theater seats, with at least an ear visible of over a dozen patient dogs.]

#how does one become an actor that caters solely to dogs?

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I hope the upstairs neighbours enjoyed my Gertrude the Cry monologue half as much as I'm enjoying their off key rendition of Dancing Queen

Also today's rehearsal was bomb except for this bit:

Me, in the weeks leading up to this conversation: man, [director]'s shows are getting such great reviews in Edinburgh, I'm so excited to do the Ed Fringe next year!

Director, driving me to the station: Anyway fuck Edinburgh

#😭#I just wanna go do theatre in Scotland for a month #is that too much to ask???

Day 1 of rehearsal lads LET'S GO

#pls send your good vibes my way I haven't been in a show for a year

tchaikovskaya

being in ur 20s really is like *looks in the mirror* so i guess this is the most attractive i’ll ever be :/

regularlesbian

no. recognize your milf potential

#thank u #I'm reaching the end of my 20s and I needed this #beige don't age mama I will be shooting for full MILF qualification #except without the mother thing #hey it's me a OABILF #(Old Ass Bitch I'd Like To Fuck)

theshitneyspears

this is WILD

#Katie #this is the scene I was talking about #I should also point out that there are several minutes of the producers running around being like WHERE IS SHE #before they find her #SHE'S ZOOMIN DUDE

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spiroandthelacktones

cunt-ceptual

Me, a top member of the LGBT death squad, hunting heteros for sport.

#the dream #this is the future that rosies want

19 degrees my ass??? Why am I SWEATING

#PLEASE I want to wear velvet tonight I need the temperature to drop

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