blue raspberry bubblegum

There are 288 signs, not 48. Now we know.

The Extended Zodiac

Chapter 18 is my baby, and I dearly hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I wrote the first draft in the fall of 2013; however, it’s been in a constant state of revision for most of the last 2 years. It was always intended to be the longest chapter in LILIH, simply because it’s nearly an entire arc unto itself, even though it still only represents a small portion of the overall story. It’s 47 pages long (encompassing roughly 20% of LILIH thus far), and it has a side story sequel that’s another 27 pages. After that, LILIH will again go on hiatus indefinitely, or at least probably for another 2 years while I finish my training program. Again – not abandoned, just simmering on a back burner.

This chapter revolves around another two or three plotlines that you might recall have been brewing for a while; warning for sexual content and loaded language. Moderately spoilery comments continue past the cut.

Remember how I disappeared a while back? Chapter 17 is the one that I got stuck on; it was started around the end of the summer in 2013, and didn’t get finished until over two years later. Since it’s another major chapter in Jane’s arc, it was important to make sure that it meshed with her last one – thus the delay on publishing Chapter 14. (Also, there was no way I was going to leave you hanging at the end of Chapter 16 for two years.)

Roxy’s homecoming is up this week; warning for allusions to self-harm. I wrote chapter 15 in the summer of 2013, which is why Dirk and Roxy have completely different powers than they do in canon. Lots of new tags in the upcoming chapters – as usual, I won’t tag new relationships right away, to avoid spoilers for those of you who’ve been keeping up with each chapter as it comes out. (I know that there are only about 5 of you, but you’re so damn sweet to me it that it feels like a never-ending parade.)

Roxy’s struggle with depression is informed by my own. Depression is not a personal problem. It is a black hole that affects everyone around you, and you can’t climb out of it on your own. If you or someone you know is depressed, help is just a click away.

Hopeline: hopeline.com | 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: suicidepreventionlifeline.org | 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)

Hi, friend! It’s good to hear from you!

LILIH is still on my mind on a daily, and often hourly, basis. I play out scenes in my head constantly, fine-tuning things I’ve already written and outlining what I have yet to tackle. As you probably know, I have thousands and thousands of words for you. Examples include: chapters 14-16 &18 (finished); chapters 17, 19, 22 & 23 (incomplete); and spin-offs including dave’s story (completed, but not the final title), is it bright where you are (completed; it’s the epilogue), and something called pony story (wow I don’t even remember starting that one :\ ). LILIH is outlined into 24 chapters, though chapter 24 is really just a snapshot. There are also 2 more spin-offs which I don’t intend to try to tackle until LILIH is actually finished (one is from Terezi’s perspective, and one is from Kanaya’s. Neither are essential to the story and they’re both going to require a pretty focused mindset, so it’s better to save them for last. If I’m burned out at that point, you won’t miss them too much.) I also have a few fun things to share, like some of my notes and references, which will come through tumblr after the fact.

BUT RASPBERRY WHY DON’T YOU JUST UPLOAD WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE NOOOWWW

Because I’m selfish. LILIH is me in my truest form* and I can’t bear to bare myself until I’m presentable. And that means there will be no updates until I finish chapter 17. Which, if it helps, is 1500 words longer than it was 6 months ago, and only a few scenes away from being finished. (That probably doesn’t help. Sorry.)

I would love to finish LILIH before Hussie finishes Homestuck. Will I? Probably not. But I’d like to at least be able to give you chapters 14-18, anyway, and I might actually be able to pull that off for you. Some things I’ve been sitting on for literally YEARS. For instance, in chapter 15 we learn about Roxy’s (other) powers. They’re not ones she actually has in Homestuck. Why? Because I wrote chapter 15 over 2 years ago, before we knew about Roxy’s other powers. In chapter 16, among other things, Karkat is knocked unconscious for his own protection. Also written 2 years ago. What am I supposed to do about that? Publish it anyway, probably.

One of my favorite things about Hussie’s work is that Homestuck is so rich with detail, foreshadowing, and characterization that the astute reader can pick up new insight with every reading and even try to extrapolate the direction the story will take, for instance, re:John/Roxy. And yet, he can still take us entirely unawares, mostly by continuously upping the stakes. And it’s fantastic. I’m in the middle of a 3 year certification program for a fancy, grown-up job that I really enjoy. But you know what I really want to be when I grow up? A published writer. Hopefully, one with at least a small fraction of Hussie’s talent. LILIH is my “training program” for that job. And if you enjoy it too, well, that tickles the heck out of me.

The timing of your message is interesting, by the way. Are you aware that today is the 2 year anniversary of the end of A6A6I2? [S] Game Over happened a little less than a year ago. Are you, like me, immersed in rereading Homestuck while it’s once again paused, hoping for some insight into its final form?

Anyway, it was nice hearing from you! I hope you’re doing well. You guys have all been so kind to (and supportive of) me, even though I’ve been horrid about updating LILIH. I can’t convey how much your messages mean to me, especially at this particularly insane juncture in my life.

My dearest wish is that you have or find something in your life that is as happy and fulfilling for you as writing LILIH is for me. And my second wish is that I can deliver the finished product(s) to you sooner rather than later, and that they are worthy of your eyes when that happens.

Love,

raspberry