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Male companionship will never be compatible with full radfem values because men are the oppressor. Radical feminism is a women's liberation movement - calling even "healthy" relationships with the oppressor in line with a liberation movement is absurd.

In my opinion, it will never be compatible with radical feminism until women are completely free from the patriarchy and the oppressor. That is the only time there is a chance of it becoming "safer".

Even in the healthiest of relationships, your male partner is still statistically the most likely person to hurt or kill you. Him being a "good" guy does not change that, no matter how much you try to convince yourself that it does. You are not in any less danger and to suggest that you are, is dismissive of the women who marry "good" guys and then become victims of sexual violence and domestic violence.

You do not need companionship. You do not need romantic relationships. It is not necessary to survive.

If you happen to be in one already and you're happy and comfortable, then fine. I cannot criticise that as it would be hypocritical. As long as you are aware of the risks.

Discovering radical feminism masterposts:

Post 1

Post 2

Post 3

Post 4

Radical feminist literature:

Post 1

Post 2

Post 3

Post 4

Post 5

Post 6

Post 7

Post 8

Post 9 (newer and better!)

Other masterposts/useful sources

Post 1: sex trafficking sources

Post 2: prostitution sources from prostituted women

Post 3: anti porn resources + TRAs debunking

Post 4: anti porn masterpost

Post 5: Sue Donym's work

Post 6: sources on surrogacy

Post 7: resources about forced marriage

Post 8: sex is dichotomous with sources

Post 9: miscellaneous masterpost with a lot of great stuff

You’re eager to criticize poor male behavior yet you also vehemently deny real-world oppression that we all suffer from? Acknowledging the wage gap and sexual violence statistics is all fun and games but deconstructing anything beyond that is somehow taking things too far? Do you not see the irony in condemning things like the cosmetic industry while degrading other women who choose not to shave?

I want to know at what point they think the oppression of women starts and stops. Do you genuinely believe that thousands of years of misogyny simply disappears overnight? Is it truly the case that your father, your brother, your boyfriend have miraculously been deprogrammed and it’s all other men that are the problem?

Here are some tips for getting the most out of joining a regional feminist discord server.

Get verified! The sooner you get verified the better. Work with the server owner to make it happen.

Introduce yourself! Writing an intro can be daunting but it doesn't have to be a Pulitzer winning intro. A template you can use: "My name is (your name/handle). I'm from (town/city/state). I enjoy (hobby, TV show, book series, etc). Some feminist topics that interest me are (female spaces, women in stem, etc). I'm most excited to (make new friends here, connect with like minded women, engage in feminist activism, etc)." This is an intro that tells everyone a little bit about you and gives you an opportunity to make connections which leads to...

Read everyone else's intros! Most servers have an intros channel. This is a great way to get a feel for who else is out there. If you find a person with similar interests, ping them in the discord using the @ feature. It's going to feel cheesy and forced but this is a great way to get conversations started.

Attend meetup opportunities, if you're an adult. The reason you joined a regional discord is to make connections. Take the first step and go to a meetup.

Create meetup opportunities, if you're an adult. More likely than not, there won't be a plethora of meetups; especially if the group is small. Meetups don't have to be fancy. "I'm going to check out (coffee shop/theater/park/local protest/etc) in (town/city). Would anyone like to join?"

Attend/Create virtual meetup opportunities. In person meetups may not be as feasible for smaller groups or groups that span a large area. Utilize discord features like group voice calls and screen shares to talk, watch shows together, and simply hang.

Embrace new members! When new members join, read their intro and give them a hello.

It's been cool to see everyone's interpretation of her art, but let me clarify that this isn't a transgender poem. It's about womanhood and misogyny. Here's an excerpt of a 2015 Patti Smith interview with Maclean's.

"In the ’50s you had to wear pink ribbons if you were a girl, and you were supposed to become a hairdresser or a secretary. I couldn’t stomach it. Later on, when I fell in love with my husband and had children, that’s when my mother’s earthiness or sense of femaleness kicked in. As an artist, I never wanted to be fettered by gender nor recognized or defined as a female poet, musician or singer. They don’t do that with men—nobody says Picasso, the male artist."

There is a mention of political lesbianism (or an implication that the author may have believed in political lesbianism) which I don’t like, but overall it’s compelling essay! My favorite part:

The parasitism of males on females is, as I see it, demonstrated by the panic, rage and hysteria generated in so many of them by the thought of being abandoned by women. But it is demonstrated in a way that is perhaps more generally persuasive by both literary and sociological evidence. Evidence cited in Jesse Bernard’s work in The Future of Marriage and in George Gilder’s Sexual Suicide and Men Alone convincingly shows that males tend in shockingly significant numbers and in alarming degree to fall into mental illness, petty crime, alcoholism, physical infirmity, chronic unemployment, drug addiction and neurosis when deprived of the care and companionship of a female mate, or keeper. (While on the other hand, women without male mates are significantly healthier and happier than women with male mates.) And masculist literature is abundant with indications of male cannibalism, of males deriving essential sustenance from females. Cannibalistic imagery, visual and verbal, is common in pornography: images likening women to food, and sex to eating. And, as documented in Millett’s Sexual Politics and many other feminist analyses of masculist literature, the theme of men getting high off beating, raping or killing women (or merely bullying them) is common. These interactions with women, or rather, these actions upon women, make men feel good, walk tall, feel refreshed, invigorated. Men are drained and depleted by their living by themselves and with and among other men, and are revived and refreshed, re-created, by going home and being served dinner, changing to clean clothes, having sex with the wife; or by dropping by the apartment of a woman friend to be served coffee or a drink and stroked in one way or another; or by picking up a prostitute for a quicky or for a dip in favorite sexual escape fantasies; or by raping refugees from their wars (foreign and domestic). The ministrations of women, be they willing or unwilling, free or paid for, are what restore in men the strength, will and confidence to go on with what they call living.