In theory… But serious question: Have you ever met anyone who actually WANTED to DM? Because desire is a key factor in determining how much fun a DM would have.
So, I fully understand that I’ll never have as much fun DMing as I would being a player. Like, if you don’t want to be DM, you’ll never enjoy it as much as the players. And no one ever wants to DM—at least that I’ve met (and judging from the Internet, that’s true for most people).
Think about it. A DM (when they really want to pull out all the stops and wow the table) will work upwards of 12 hours a week, sometimes more (usually on top of whatever life they have on an everyday basis) crafting encounters, and maps, and NPCs, and story hooks, ect. etc. ad nauseum… Only for players to cancel last minute or bumble-fuck around the entire session—not paying attention to anything—and then passively whine about how they don’t know where the story’s going or what they’re doing. Although they probably don’t mean it offensively, they ‘bout to catch these hands when that slutty cliche Tief opens her mouth again. (And by “catch these hands,” I mean of course “smited by the invisible god of the table”)
My party has forcefully elected me as DM (hopefully not permanently) because “[I’m] such a good writer and storyteller. We can’t do what you do.”
Which, like, thank you (that means a lot). But sometimes I’d like to take a backseat and just enjoy a session of being a murder-hobo and not having to coordinate every detail of every moving plot thread every week. 🤷♀️
I totally get where you’re coming from. DMing involves far more responsibility than playing. And it’s frustrating to have that responsibility completely thrust upon you. Ideally you would be able to take turns. But it doesn’t have to be a chore. I mean, even at my most involved I never spend anywhere close to 12 hours a week on prep. Familiarity with the mechanics and the confidence to improvise cuts down on that aspect of the labor immensely.
But more importantly, DMing creates it’s own unique joy that you can’t get from just playing. Some people LIKE spending hours preparing for their sessions. Crafting unique challenges and worlds is fun! Running a successful session gives you a powerful rush! Watching your players react to what you’ve built is immensely satisfying.
To put it simply, YES, some people want to DM. <3
Yeah - I have to disagree with the assertion that no one wants to DM.
I LOVE to DM. I LOVE writing and running games. Half of my coworkers at my previous job loved to DM and we would gush about the cool stories we were writing or unique worlds we were working on or whatever. When I ran d&d summer camps half of the kids actively wanted to build and run their own games (and not only did so successfully but would return to that store regularly to do so for their friends)
The PROBLEM comes from people being pushed into it because no one else in the particular group wants to; someone doing it so long with no break and getting burn out; and bad players.
I know it can be controversial to say “bad players” but if you have players who actively complain about the way you run the game, make people at the table uncomfortable, or refuse to engage with the game, then they’re a bad player.
Part of what has kept DMing so enjoyable for me is that I frankly don’t allow players in my games if they aren’t going to be respectful of me, my time, the other players, and their time.
Now obviously I’m not implying that everyone has to be an angel all the time. Sometimes something comes up and someone has to cancel - that’s different than someone cancelling 50% or more of the time. Sometimes someone has had a bad day and is snippy during a game - that’s different from someone being intentionally antagonistic towards to the table every time they sit down.
And the DM won’t be 100% all the time either. Players sometimes have feedback for DMs when something didn’t sit right with them - that’s different from just tearing apart the work the DM put in.
If you don’t like DMing, that’s totally fair - it isn’t for everyone. But if you don’t like it because the other players are making you miserable, you need to have a serious talk with your players about it.
And assuming no one wants to do it and making it sound like a horrible drag is a surefire way to ensure that you never get someone in your group who DOES want to DM.
