Bloguacmolé

Well well well, look who made it into Cannes this year?! That’s right! Our green flesh of the Gods is totes relevant among the youthz. It’s a win for humanity.  

I implore you not to be fooled by this mess. Sh*t does not work. And not only that, but if you have a tiny avocado, or an extraordinary large avocado, it gets really self conscious that it doesn’t fit into the mold. STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME FIT INTO THE MOLD, MOM!

Squish a delicious piece of Summer between your slappy happy hands. This is the for real goodgood. Jaw dislocation affirmative. #worthit

It’s disturbing. It’s fantastical. It’s fascinating. Not to be confused with a fascinator, which is also fantastic and fantastically fascinating. If only doing this could produce more Avocados, I’d pay up for the procedure.

A Better Person

I can’t be bothered to read these VERY GOOD REASONS, namely because I just yelled at myself with caps lock, but also, it doesn’t sounds very appetizing. Unless you can fast-forward it’s growth into a tree, with more of its brethren. Then you got me. You got me to eat more avocado. That’s what we’re talking about right?

Avocado. Le delicious flesh. The big question: Is this photo from Halloween or Paris fashion week? 

Adam & Ava in the garden of Eatin.’ Feast your eyes here.

A gruesome crime scene from CSI: Mexico

Ya damn right. Easy, breezy, beautiful, cover grill - with this immediately. 

Mayweather getting freakalicious with some guacamole. It's not unlike that reoccurring dream of yours, no?

Qdoba keeps it right by NOT charging for sides like guaca-holy. Take note of this food chain's appreciation for doing the right thing. Mang.

Well, here's a reason not to leave the house.

You guac your way, we guac our way. And even though I'm throwing visual spears at some of the blasphemous recommendations above, when it comes down to the way you guac, there is no judgement, people.

It's times like this you come across the CAC (Cali Avo commission) and ask yourself "What am I doing with my life? How am I not an California Avocado Stakeholder? How am I not a grower? Am I a show-er? Why doesn't Paz de la Huerta do anything with her eyebrows?" It's hard-hitting stuff. 

No one wants to see a sad avocado. 

I HEAR YOU MY MAN. Judge Judy show some mercy on this hungry soul.