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@bleedsloyal
psa:Β Β moved !

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psa:Β Β moved !
:party hat emoji:
CAN YOU REMEMBER YOUR DEATH ?Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β indie hc based joseph oda of the evil within written by batty
in other news nobody cares about i am undecided if i want to just say the post-beacon verse i haveΒ is my designated endgame and the rest or auβs or leave it open ended w multiple possibilites

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icb the day i actually want to write and finish the remake blog and have the time --
disco by request as usual
@agonybowβ sent:Β for all of joseph's quiet subtleties, for every choice made to be discrete and to not make a fuss, sebastian countered it with a boisterous decision of his own. perhaps together, they could have made for one normal person, but apart, there was no hope. ' happy birthday, joseph! ' there would be no protesting listened to as sebastian swept up joseph into a squeezing hug, delight and excitement upon his face rivaling that of a golden retriever seeing its favorite person. ' feel older yet?? '
for the most part, joseph knew what to expect the moment he made eye contact, having sense even to shift what heβd been holding to avoid any catastrophe when sebastian appeared to claim him in a hug he was once sure would break him in half.Β
β yeah, thanks. β
still, it was not without its enjoyment, small grin instant even without the pressure on his spine - it was impossible otherwise.Β something in sebastianβs enthusiasm always had been, and probably always wouldΒ be, curiously infectious, his own typical aversion to both attention andΒ touch be damned.Β
β what, youβre telling me i donβt look like it? βΒ
Madness: A Bipolar Life, Marya Hornbacher
@agonybowβ sent:Β β hey, if /iβm/ not allowed to stay up for a straight 72 hours, neither are you. β
β iβm not. βΒ indignant, maybe even a little petulant, his form previously beginning to slump over the desk with telltale fatigue snapped up almost immediately, much to the chagrin of his spine.
alright, so maybe time had gotten a little bit away from him, but -
β it hasnβt been that long. βΒ a pause.Β β ... has it? β
Β Β damn, where had he left his phone?

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hot take: t-shirt that says "my friends wont let me die"
if you date me my sleep paralysis demon becomes OUR sleep paralysis demon β€οΈ
@viduamorβ sent:Β β turns out people are still murderous bastards on the weekend. β Β Β Β idk meme / closed
β just wish theyβd take one off sometime. β
not that either of them had actually been doing any sleeping, halfway through decryption of a laptop for an entirely unrelated case, but it made joseph no more thrilled to be interrupted for the call.Β
pity and a tired sort of annoyance marked his expression to lift the edge of the starch white tarp with the end of his pen, before stepping back to make notes - middle aged male, poor physical condition, shoe missing, perhaps homeless or assaulted first at a different location. no clear witnesses, no weapon yet. forensics would be taking most of this one.
β sorry to have to drag you out here like this. i can pick up coffee or something on the way back once this is wrapped up, if you want. shouldnβt take that long. β he had no idea what her pay grade must entail, hell he barely knew what her job was, but he wasnβt sure if it covered dealing with homicide victims in the witching hours of a city that had plenty of them. or maybe he simply hoped not. it wasnβt exactly a job for everyone.
Reminiscent
Watercolor on Black Paper
2019, 16"x 14"
Red Poppies
@agonybowβ sent:Β shield: my (sebastian) muse shields yours (joseph) with their body Β Β Β meme / open
dust settled thick and heavy, mingling with smoke and plaster in his lungs to make him cough to clear them. tinnitus rang shrill and distant in his ears, filling in for the profound silenceΒ the absence of mechanical beeping offered. it was inevitable, with how little (nonexistent) formal training he had and the very bloodthirsty nature of the place that he was going to slip up at some point.
the traps had become more and more complex the further on they pressed.
were joseph any less rational a person he might have even suggested the landscape was somehow learning from their successes so far. evolving.Β surely it was no coincidence this door had been covered with enough wire to make krimsonβs entire bomb squad blanch, with the one before it disarmed by a fluke and minute detail alone.Β frankly, it was almost a shock in itself he had managed to so far not to lose a limb or electrocute them both or --
it took a moment before the high, whining ringing subsided, and though soreness throbbed dully in his joints, joseph counted himself relieved to have them in the first place, quickly counting himself generally unscathed from the whole ordeal.
such gladness was short-lived; a small shock of horror shot up his spine to realize it was not debris that kept him pinned, but a familiar weight.
oh god --
before joseph could utter a noise, sebastian seemed to have the sense to draw back, and the notion he could move at all was enough for a second rush of relief to nearly punch the air right back out of him.
immediately, he found himself glancing his partner over head to still attached extremities, searching for blood, burns, anything that could need immediately addressed.Β how often would the poor man have to keep suffering for josephβs incompetence?Β
Β β you -- β still breathless in immediate panic and dust coating his throat, concern was eclipsed only briefly to catch sebastianβs eyes and recognize he had the fucking audacityΒ to be doing just the same.
suddenly, he had just over half a mind to punch the man.Β
βΒ i'm alright. βΒ what the hell were you thinking ?? of course, he full well knew what the answer to that was, and couldnβt hold that gaze accordingly. it wandered to the door instead - or what hadΒ been, now a gaping hole in the wall. the jagged edges reminded him fittingly enough of waiting teeth.
β well, i guess thats one way to open a door. βΒ it wasnβt funny. joseph couldnβt even say with conviction he was really tryingΒ to be at this point, but through desperately creeping guilt he felt incapable of being much else.Β

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last of us sentence starters
β i know youβre dying to say something to me. β β youβre a fucking animal. β β i love how you think youβre better than me. but youβre not.Β β β holy shit. you got blood all over you. β β you get people desperate enough theyβll just about do anything. β β everythingβs cool. this place is not creepy at all.Β β β you can still do the right thing here. β β i donβt like company. β β it didnβt have to be this way, you know. you brought this on yourself.Β β β you still remember how to kill, right?Β β β i knew you had heart. β β our luck had to run out sooner or later. β β no matter how hard you try, i guess you canβt escape your past.Β β β yeah, you keep telling yourself that bullshit. β β we can all be poetic and just lose our minds together. β β after all weβve done. after everything iβve been through. it canβt be for nothing. β β i canβt imagine losing someone you love like that. losing everything that you knowβ¦ β β run, little rabbit, run. β β you just kinda seem extra quiet today. β β iβm gonna teach you how to play guitar. β β you think you know me, huh?Β β β and if i say no? β β i have to do this. i donβt know what else to say. β β whatever it is you think youβre going through right now is nothing to what i have been through. β β youβre gonna make it. β β you have no idea what iβm capable of. β β do you have any idea how many men weβve lost here today? β β i mightβve done that if you didnβt try to fucking kill me. β β you can come around. youβre loyal. you have heart, and youβre special. β β stay down. donβt let them see you. β β i needed him alive. β β you are treading on some mighty thin ice here. β β how many close calls have we had? β β admit that you wanted to get rid of me the whole time! β β is this all they really had to worry about? boys. movies. deciding which shirt goes with which skirtβ¦itβs bizarre. β β how is it that youβre never scared? β β how about βit was either him or me. thanks for saving my ass!β. you got any of that for me? β β okayβ¦wellβ¦have a good night. β β do you even realize what your life means? running off like thatβ¦putting yourself at riskβ¦itβs pretty goddamn stupid. β β iβve seen it in my dreams. β β i guess weβre both disappointed at each other then. β β man, you hit hard. β β once upon a time, i had someone i cared about. β β youβre not gonna make it. β β this goes on record for the worst fucking job youβve ever taken. β β you kill a lot of innocent people?Β β β you wonβt survive long out there. i can protect you. β β the others wonβt be happy about this. β β i shot the hell outta that guy, huh?Β β β you kill to surviveβ¦and so do i. β β i feel sick. β β youβre doing a good job. i figure you should know that. β β youβre pissed, but youβre not going to do anything. β β i ainβt telling you shit. β β every battleβs got a losing side. β β how many bullets do you have left? β β hey, relax. weβre safe. β β if youβre gonna steal, you better make sure you get away with it.Β β β no, noβ¦this is too rich for my blood. β β iβm not leaving without you. β β to the edge of the universe and back. endure and survive. β β iβve been on both sides. β β i wasnβt trying to disobey you back there. you were taking a while and i thought, maybe youβve gotten into trouble.Β Β β β thereβs some pretty gnarly stuff in here. β β you donβt need to worry about me. β β hey, you got a second? i just want to say iβm sorryβ¦thatβs it. i wonβt bring it up again.Β β β itβs the people that scare me. β β just so itβs out there: i canβt swim. β β just go! just fucking goβ¦ β β if you got anything to confess, this would be the place to do it. β β must be hard justβ¦leaving all your stuff behind like that. β β not fairies though. they creep me out. β β we can sneak by them, even though i know thatβs not your style. β β good? cβmon, give me details. describe it. β β that thing scared the shit out of me. β β youβre gonna be real happy you didnβt kill me. β β if it was the other way around, would you have come back for me?Β β β i know that you are smarter than this. β β well iβm the romantic type. β β you must be important. whatβs the deal with you? β β to be honest, i donβt give two shits what youβre up to. β β ainβt a big fan of these odds. β β take a moment to catch your breath. β β itβs okay. itβs me. itβs me. itβs me. look. lookβ¦itβs me. β β you are making it very difficult to keep you alive. β β now donβt get upset. itβs not your fault. β β iβm scared of ending up alone. β β bodyβs not that old. keep your eyes and ears open. β β i believe that everything happens for a reason. β β you mumble in your sleep. β β weβre a team now. weβre gonna help each other out. β β youβre bleeding. β β guess what, weβre shitty people. itβs been that way for a long time. β β iβve been quite honest with you. now i think itβs your turn. β β you handled yourself pretty nicely back there. β β get it together. weβre not alone. β β what are you scared of?Β β β now what? you gonna chop me up into tiny pieces?Β β β no, noβ¦no such thing as luck. β β i understand itβs not easy to trust a stranger. β β thereβs a place for you here, you know.Β β β this rain isnβt gonna do us any good. β β how was your morning? β β you really shouldnβt be out here all on your own. β β come onβ¦you gotta get up. β β hands on your fucking head. β β you lay your hands on me again, it wonβt end well for you. β β iβve been on quite the adventure. β β i got nothing but nightmares from those years. β β i owe you a favor. is this some kind of joke? β β you wanted to be left alone, remember? β β let me look at you. you got fucking old. β β what are you still doing up? itβs late. β β that was plan a, b, c, all the way to fucking z. β β please not right now. i do not have the energy for this. β β whoeverβs hurt, you clearly care about them. β β any sudden moves and iβll put one right between your eyes. β β everyone i have cared for has either died or left me. β β look the other way. iβll make this worth your while. β β when i give you the signal, we run. β β here, lean on me. β β did they say how many are dead? β β when i was a kid i wanted to be aβ¦a singer. β β whatever favors you think i owe you, it isnβt worth that much. β β you canβt deny that view. β β what makes you think iβd do this for you?Β β β i am none of your goddamn business. β β thanks for your heroics and all. β β things happenβ¦and we move onΒ β β you do what i say when i say it. we clear? repeat it.Β β β we can just keep our histories to ourselves.Β β β come on. make this easy for me. β β itβs like weβre on a date. β β thereβs enough here that you have to feel some sort of obligation toward me. β β well is that everything you hoped for? β β yeah, they got a few good hits in but-look, i managed!Β β β iβd say we make a pretty good team. β β weβre gonna get out of this. i promise. β β couple days from now weβll probably be dead anyway. β β stay down. donβt let them see you. β β has anyone come in here? β β i was thinking, after we get back, we could take it easy for a while. β β what do you know about us? about me? β β you havenβt seen what iβve seen. β β iβm notβ¦iβm not going anywhere. β β define okay. β β fun day at work, huh? β β no matter what, you keep finding something to fight for. β β here, i got you. give me your hand.Β β β other than shitty my pantsβ¦iβm fine. β β sorry for stealing your horse. β β itβs called luck, and itβs gonna run out. β β do i need to remind you what is out there? β β we are going our seperate ways. β β i was on my way here, and i got jumped by these two assholes, alright? β β whatever it is you heard, it isnβt true okay?Β β β your watch is broken. β β whole building feels like itβs going to fall apart. β
ive had this url for at least a year and then last night at midnight i tripped onto a canon one and i hate that