this is why we can't have nice things

Will: PSH don't try to give me second-hand grossness, I'm the least gross boy in the world. Well, maybe anyway. I like to think I'm good competition for it!

Will: EXPLAINS WHY SO MUCH OF THE WORLD IS NASTY :-P But seriously lmao bug MK about that if she's the one who's attention you want so much, it's not like I can do anything about it for you.

Will: Because then it wouldn't be garbage! It would be lobster in a can! By definition, garbage includes garbage!

Blake: BEING GROSS CAN BE FUN SOMETIMES, BRO! LET ME GROSSIFY YOU A LITTLE.

Blake: You're family! And her future king! You can totally do something about it, you just haaaaate me.

Ally: Oh, but if you fall stilts could help you cover the distance too! I vote yay for stilts! Plus they look like a lot of fun to walk on!

Zoe: I didn't have anything left to say. You can be right to you and I can be right to me. That's how this whole different-people-different-perspectives thing works.

Archie: Even to the ounce. We don't play when it comes to comics in my house lol. I'LL KNOW IT WAS YOU SO WHY ARE YOU EVEN BOTHERING WITH THE PLOTTING? I see Wolverine, so definitely betting on some Marvel in there. Dad always like Batman too, so who knows? It's probably a treasure trove of old school comics!

Evie: Obvi, I'm the only one that plays with her hair though (and only when she lets me), and duh! Mal wins all of those, I'd never let her lose!

Evie: I do all those same things with Dizzy, too, you know.

Will: Well, you're good at it, so you might just be the most winningest winner of all.

Will: STOP, YOU'VE ALREADY GROSSED ME OUT TOO MUCH FOR ONE DAY.

Will: Its still garbage lobster, covered in whatever garbage fluids there are!

Blake: You can be a winner by association, best friend benefits :-p

Blake: I know, I know, MK's the grossest :-p That's what happens when SOMEONE WON'T JUST ADMIT THEY LOVE ME, THEY TURN ALL NASTY! lol

Zoe: Do you always curse when you don't have a point?

Ally: And you can! In just three more steps! And I've got an entire box of Bertie Botts for you when you do!

Evie: "The gay vibes?" And what exactly is considered "gay" about me hanging out with my best friend?

Archie: I know exactly how much the box weighs. I'd know if anything was missing 😒 But just looking at the top there's gotta be some good ones! And these are VINTAGE!

Will: If winning is making me gag? Then YES :-P

Will: She's Mary Kate, of course she's never going to change her mind when it comes to you lol. But that's okay because the superior branch of the family sees you as amazing as you and that matters, right?

Will: PFFT. You don't have to eat garbage to know that cake tastes better.

Blake: Grossing you out, seems like a win!

Blake: BRO I LOVE YOU BUT YOU KNOW IT WOULD MAKE MY DAD'S LIfE IF MK WOULD JUST LIKE... EVEN PRETEND TO BE MY GIRLFRIEND FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES! I WANNA CAPTURE THE LOOK ON HIS FACE 'CAUSE IT WOULD BE PRICELESS!

Zoe: My feelings are based on what I see, not what I hear from Gwen. And based on what I see, I wouldn't want to go near Hailey anyway so lol very easy instructions to follow.

Ariana: (You are aware that I'm the captain for Hufflepuff, correct??? I have my own practices and stuff to do. I don't know who to start with!!! 4.)

Mary Kate: WE'RE AT A SCHOOL FOR WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY! WE'RE ALL MAGIC!

Mary Kate: Stopppppppp.

Blake: I'm a special brand of magic!

Evie: You don't even know if there's anything to know lol but what I want to know is why you think we are. Maybe if you tell me that, I'll tell you~

Archie: [unsent] So..... would you like kill me if I asked your sister to hang out in Hogsmeade? Because like I really like her so... I wanna know my chances of survival.

Archie: My dad just sent me a box full of comic books! Wanna go through them with me?

Hails: No because Gwen would be sad and I don't want that.

Hails: Oh yay! That's even better. I just need Blake time anyway.

Blake: Gwen? Sad? Sounds fake, feels fake. She can always challenge me to a duel afterwards, then I'd finally have an excuse to hex her a little bit too.