#text:will

Robbie: Don't tell Mary Kate, but I broke a bottle of wine trying to open it with a sword AGAIN.

Blake: Hey, are we ever going to get more trees outside of our bedroom? Because I knoooow we're married and I can use the door like a normal person, but wouldn't it be so much hotter if I could swing into bed every night instead?

Mary Kate: I really should just never try to cook again. I didn't light anything on fire this time, but I tried to make brownies and they wouldn't even rise. It's like... flat hard chocolate bricks.

Kalasin: WHY!!! IS ZAC EFRON!!! PLAYING TED BUNDY!!!

Blake: can't meet you for lunch, Filch caught me sliding down a banister again and I'm running around the castle trying to hide from him until he gets too frustrated to give me detention!

Kirby: Mr. Will sir? I haven't seen Princess Sparkle Rainbow Sunshine in a few days and I'm worried that she's lost. Have you seen her hanging around the common room? Or wandering off on an adventure?

Mary Kate: Inquiring minds (who may or may not belong to girls named Mary Kate and Venus) are wondering how you feel about the idea of other people doing body shots off of Blake these days.

Blake: On a scale of 1 to 37, how likely are you to come drag my arse out of bed if I try to roll over and go back to sleep right now?