I won’t ask you to mend me.  That is work that only my hands can know how to do.

It's more to it than just painting the perfect picture. We have to learn to "BE" the perfect picture.

Because when the smoke clears,

and the hurt has lessened...

We have to be able to be ok alone

and not look away or be afraid

of our own reflection.

Did we fall short? Was there a lesson?

Did we lose control, or engage in

immediate gratification,

for a long term loss effect?

Feeding the addict waiting?

Were we not paying attention?

Were we running at a faster pace

Because we were afraid

That a savage and reckless past

was waiting?

Did we respond with compassion,

or agitation?

Was anything but love placed above

in our motivation?

Was our higher power present?

Did we react in anger and aggravation

aggression fueled by sadness,

stress and

thoughts of feeling less than

plague you

Were we rejected?

finally realizing that they're broken

Did we overdose on false hopes

of being the exception?

adding to our forever growing

list of regrets?

What did I hope to gain?

Did I cause pain?

Where was the blessing?

Or did I miss it all

in the process of my misdirection?

Am I suffering the effects

of long term depression?

Am I living in the past

Do I still practice deception

Did I pray,

and have faith in his protection?

Or did I go out in a blaze

unprotected

without scripture to use as a vest

or a weapon...

and then blame God

cuz I got these scars

cuz my life is insane hard

cuz I never put in

the extra effort...

Getting high to "get by"

Handcuffed at the wrist

now I'm arrested

So much for the time

in my life that I've invested

now im in the system as a felon.

Ive been deceived

but no one will believe

what I tell them

And no one seems

to want to buy

the dreams

or the bullshit I'm selling.

But im in control,

until I fold

MAD cuz nothings left

but a prison sentence

with no possibility

of parole or redemtion...

When God wanted to drive

the whole time...

but I seldom let him.....