Vampire Dyke Rights! @bellastinycactus - Tumblr Blog

Józef Mehoffer (Polish, 1869-1946) • Pink Room • 1907-13

Think pink

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thepaintedroom

Józef Mehoffer (Polish, 1869-1946) • Pink Room • 1907-13

thevisualvamp

Think pink

fuckmeyer

boy howdy Eclipse was really something huh

Hi i’m back. Sorry for the long silence, but Twitter is boring and I was missing the chaos of tumblr. Honestly I feel like this place has aged like a fine wine.

This blog will still have a lot of twilight, but I think it’ll become my main blog so it’ll be a mix of the following:

- twilight

- judaism (i’m converting ayyyy)

-lesbianism

-old hollywood

#twilight #judaism #jewish conversion #old hollywood #film history #lesbian #bisexual #sappho #sapphic #kabbalah #lgbt #gay

boazpriestly

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asstronauts

Iconic Baseball Scenes Must Include:

Bat Swinging

Dude with Hat

Batter Up!

Silly Pitches

Big Hit!

lil Run

Slide Home!

is-destiel-canon-yet

Is Destiel Canon Yet?

11/25/20: Si.

#si means if #so mysterious #not twilight

ceremoonialsz

kristen stewart - follow us on twitter: @ceremoonialsz

bellasredchevy

“Woah babe your tits are poggers!” -Bella to Edward probably

withered-rose-with-thorns

I approached the barren, vacant face slowly, my truck rumbling out a comforting roar behind me. I stopped when I got to the porch stairs, because there was nothing here. No lingering sense of their presence…of his presence. The house was solidly here, but it meant little. Its concrete reality would not counteract the nothingness of the nightmares. I didn’t go any closer. I didn’t want to look in the windows. I wasn’t sure which would be harder to see. If the rooms were bare, echoing empty from floor to ceiling, that would certainly hurt. Like my grandmother’s funeral, when my mother had insisted that I stay outside during the viewing. She had said that I didn’t need to see Gran that way, to remember her that way, rather than alive. But wouldn’t it be worse if there were no change? If the couches sat just as I’d last seen them, the paintings on the walls-worse still, the piano on its low platform? It would be second only to the house disappearing all together, to see that there was no physical possession that tied them in anyway. That everything remained, untouched and forgotten, behind them. Just like me. (for kellythepitiablefangirl)

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jasperapologist

we deserved a scene where bella, high as shit on painkillers in the hospital from her most recent injury, doesn’t realize she’s talking to one of the cullens and adamantly sticks with the cover story and they all just start messing with her as she very loopily struggles to explain away everything they ask about

cultdicks

emmet, trying hard to maintain a straight face: but how do their eyes change colors?

bella, high as a kite: it’s dem flourescdtens

notwhatyousignedupfor

I can practically hear everyone else in the back w h e e z i n g and Edwards just like “iT tWaZ oNe TiMEEee”

notwhatyousignedupfor

Jasper, about to lose his shit: ya but they’re like really fast?

Bella, panicking: sTeRoIDZzZ aNd- aNdDdd— AdreNalINe RuShES. YOu Can LooK tHeM Up tHeYrE qUiTE CoMmoN

soft-lesbian-vampire

due to personal reasons i have decided to fuck off to the forest and marry a vampire

draintheblood

vampire money not only hysterical because it reads like it was written in one sitting in a fit of absolute rage after gerard found out stephanie meyer had based edward on him but because the first thing he established is 3 2 1 we came to FUCK. like he was like how dare u base a heterosexual vampire on me and ALSO make him a protestant or something who is scared of intimacy

stranger-spooks

Idk why everybody thinks she based Edward on Gerard. She never said that. She only said it was one of her cast choices for the movie for Edward. She did say Mcr in general inspired the books tho.

a-sucker-for-rosalie-deactivate

Step-on-me Meyer really wants to be punk rock but she just isnt.

twihard-diehard

She tried so hard…. Bet she couldn’t take sacrament for weeks when she sang the explicit lyrics…hahahaha

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name

Love how the Volturi's whole thing is collecting vampires with powers but Carlisle doesn't have any powers and they let him stay with them for like a century....like he was in the throne room portraits with them....they really just kept him around to be eye candy, huh? I bet they were fantastic sugar daddies and that's how Carlisle kickstarted his massive fortune....good for him

hybridsins

A question that’s always burned in the back of my mind. Did they keep any of Bella’s human wardrobe? Or did Alice throw everything away? I’d’ve love to have seen Bell’s reaction to her human scent. Would it have effected her, since it was herself? Would it just smell normal, like those hikers? Or smell the way other vampires smelled her? Would her human scent sing to her? These are the ?’s I need answered, Smeyer.

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whenever i have really horrible period cramps, there’s really nothing more soothing than curing up in bed with my heating pad and the first twilight movie. idk what it is but that blue filter really hits different then.

bellastinycactus

Do the vampires get winded?? Like can they just keep running forever??? Also it’s really cruel that Stephanie made them unable to cry. What kind of hell existence is that?

Also do they have just no limits to their strength or speed or any other abilities? Clearly the vampires can destroy each other in a fight so there has to be some sort of limit. Like in BD2 Bella jumps down from this cliff into the forest below, and she’s totally fine? No cracks on her skin or anything.

How fast CAN they run anyway? It’s described that they look like a blur when they run but that could be a lot of speeds. That could be 50 mph, 100 mph, 1,000 mph.

Idk I think it’s not as narratively interesting that Smeyer’s vampires are just these perpetual motion machines. It would have been way more interesting to see the limits of their physical abilities, even though they’d still be way superior to human abilities.

twihard-diehard

Okay so my Mormon heritage is going to show for a few. I have never in all my years ever heard my family express ANY emotions except happiness and anger. Like even mourning people send to happen behind closed doors as much as possible. By not letting them cry she's letting those emotions stay in 'like they should.'

They are also a depiction of the third level of heaven... So when Mormons get married they usually do it at the temple so they can be 'sealed together for eternity.' Much like soulmates in the vampire world. Because when we die we go to one of FOUR PLACES:

Hell you were a triple person to get here. Like truly terrible, James, Laurent, the main Volturi.

Lowest level of heaven: you were a good person. Filled most of the rules but didn't believe in the Christian god. Think Charlie, Billy, and honestly cause of her racist BS all the Quilete.

2nd level of heaven: Good Christians that weren't Mormon or bad Mormons. These are people who know the commandments and followed them. Most of the nomads that were there to witness for the Cullens, Benjamin, Tia, all the non vegetarian vampires because she probably likened human blood to alcohol/caffeine (big no-no if you're Mormon)

The highest level of heaven: this is where god dwells, this is where all good MORMONS end up, I think even really good nonmormons but only if they existed before the resurrection of the church.

Now if you make it to one of the top three levels sweet you can visit any of the levels below you but you cannot go above your level. And my brain in its exhausted state is highlighting more flaws in her series.... Which I love.

bellastinycactus

Ohhh this is FASCINATING. As someone who raised without any religion, let alone Mormonism, there’s a lot of references in the series that I completely miss. Thank you so much for taking the time to explain just how embedded her beliefs are in the story. I hadn’t even thought of abstaining from human blood = abstaining from caffeine.

#it was mormon porn the whole time #twilight musings #Mormons all the way down

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