How to be a BDSM Geek

A quick video on how I bundle my bondage rope.

This method allows for quick one hand releases, however it is not recommended for prolonged storage. To store your rope just hanging loosely or put into a loose hank.

https://rvarope.com/lesson/circulation-and-nerves/

All you faithful readers know I’m a big fan of knocking on a girl’s back door.   It feels great.   It’s naughty.   What’s not to like about it?

Nothing… for the guy.

For the girl, anal can often be traumatic.   I’ve posted a bunch of times on how to prepare for anal sex.   You can type “anal” in my search bar and get a ton of info.  But let me highlight some things:

Anal sex requires preparation to keep it from being messy.

Anal sex requires relaxation and trust.  If the girl isn’t relaxed… if she tenses up… that’s when it hurts.

Anal sex requires a lot of lube.   LOTS of lube.

Anal sex requires you to begin small.   A finger in the ass.  Then two fingers.  Then your cock.

Anal sex requires you to start slow.   Slide it in and pump with short, slow strokes.

Anal sex requires foreplay.  Because again, a woman needs to be really relaxed and into it before her ass will open.   

What I haven’t written about in much detail is good positions for anal.  I’ve said, “If it hurts, try the woman on top.”  But beyond that, nothing much.  That changes with this post.  

I want to share with you ten positions that can be great for anal.  They’re great for a variety of reasons: intimacy, pleasure for him, pleasure for her, comfort, etc.   I’ll spell out the benefits of each one.  They are listed in no particular order.  But if you read the articles about preparing for anal that I have written and then learn these ten positions, I guarantee you that you can comfortably (and erotically!) add this very enjoyable aspect to your sex life.  

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THE REVERSE COWGIRL RUMP RIDER

He lies on his back, legs together.  She straddles him, facing away and bounces with his dong-a-long in her bonk-a-donk.

This position is great for her, not only because it lets her control how deep and fast her ass is being fucked, but also because it provides a great angle.  He’s going straight in, with a slight upward press.  Should be comfortable.

It’s a great position for him because of the view - her bulbous back pillows being split by his love meat.   

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THE SPHINCTER SPOON

The key to this spooning technique is that the girl pulls her legs up close to her chest, maybe using her arms behind her knees to hold them.  When the legs are pulled up like that, the external spincter muscle (i.e. the asshole) loosens some.   

When the guy slides in, he goes as deep as possible.  But motion is limited.  

This position is all about intimacy.   There is a ton of body contact.  He can whisper in her ear or kiss her neck.   Guys, you also can play with her nipples or even reach between her legs and rub gently.  

This is a great starter position for the first anal of the night, precisely because there isn’t much motion.   It lets her slowly relax her booty.

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THE SUPER SODOMY SIDE SLIDE

In this position, the girl lies facedown, then pulls one leg up some.  So her one leg is straight down.  With her other leg, she’s pulled her knee up close to even with her waist.  This tilts her slightly onto her side.  The guy then straddles the one leg that is straight down.  He spreads her cheeks, and slides in.   

What makes this position great for her is how relaxing it is.   He can rub her back while he’s fucking her ass.  It also doesn’t allow for very deep penetration.   

For him there are two pleasures.  First, as he pumps, his scrotum is going to be rubbing against the smooth skin on the back of her leg.  It feels amazing.  Secondly, each time he thrusts in, her one butt cheek - the one of the leg that is straight out - is going to hit him right in what is sometimes called the “inguinal canal” area, where the guy’s leg meets his torso.  The firm but soft tush pressing in there… fuck!  Feel so good!

Guys, an added little treat for her…  She she first gets in this position, get down there, slide a finger in her vajayjay, palm facing down, curling the finger slightly.  That will place your fingertip on her g-spot.  While you work the finger in and out, let your tongue press on her asshole, just causing it to spread a little.  She’ll love it.   

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THE DALLYING IN HER DERRIERE

This is a lovely, slow, lazy way to pump her rump.   You are on her side.   She is on her back, with her legs hitched over you.  She can keep them together or spread them apart, depending on what she finds more comfortable.   

This is also a very intimate position, as it allows you to see each other’s faces.   Motion is limited, as her legs hooked over him prevent him from pumping too hard.   He can play with her chest or her clit.  She can reach down and rub his balls while he fucks her.    

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THE ASS-N-CLITTY

Another variation of women-on top.  The girl straddles the guy, cowgirl style, facing him, her knees wide apart.   She puts his hotdog in her buns, then leans back, using her hands for support.   And she bounces and bounces and bounces.  

The plus for her is that she gets to control tempo and depth.   And again, it’s a great angle - straight up her dark tunnel.  

In addition, in that position her guy has clear access to her clitty-cat.   He can pet it.  Guys, in this position, I recommend using your thumb.  Lick it so it’s slick.  Then press it down on top of her clit and roll it, like a pea bring rolled under your finger.

Or you can take a finger and curl it in, making a “come here” motion.  That puts your finger on her g-spot.  Again, roll it around like a pea under your fingertip.     

For guys, not only do you have an amazing view, but it actually is a very tight fit.  With her knees apart like that, her glute muscles get pushed together.  Thus, your shaft is cradled in soft butt cheek.  Feels amazing.

True story.   I have had a girlfriend squirt all over my abs in this position while I was in her ass.  

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THE CATHOLIC BIRTH CONTROL

You wouldn’t think missionary position would be great for anal, but it really, really is.   However, you probably need to have her hips tilted up.   You can do this simply by placing a few pillows under her hips.   

This is another position aimed at intimacy.  The couple can kiss and caress even as he’s tapping her tushie.   

This position also allows for only shallow penetration, thus it’s great for a girl who, try as she might, believes she can only take the tip.  It’s also great for a guy who is well endowed, as maybe only the first two or three inches will get in.

Guys, be careful in this position.   It’s easy to slip out.  And what can really hurt a girl is when you slip out and then don’t aim carefully when you slide back in.  It forces her anus to stretch in funny ways!   No bueno.   

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THE HERO, POOTER-POUNDER STYLE

In the kamasutra, “the Hero” position is woman on her back, with her legs pulled up to the degree that her pelvis tilts up.   This can be done a variety of ways.  She can grab under he knees and pull them back.  He can grab her ankles and push them back.   The point is, her legs are in the air, spread apart, and her hips are tilted up.  This gives him a straight shot to her pooter-palace!

After six positions which were more gentle, we now get to the ones which will be a bit harder.   Thus, it requires a bit more experience.  These are anal positions you might try after you have being doing one of the first six for awhile.  So your rump is all relaxed and ready for a good ramming.  ;) 

For the girls, the fun part of this position is that as well as any of them, you have access to your sugared almond.   While your man drills your dumper, rub that thing like you are a DJ and it’s god-damned New Years Eve.  You might cum.  

Guys, you need to understand that with her hips tilted and legs spread, you could go really, really deep.  That’s great, if she says it’s great.  If not, then this is a position where you have to exercise self control and only use the first four inches or so.    

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THE DOGGY IN THE DONK

I don’t want to exaggerate here, so I’ll say it carefully.  This is the biggest fantasy of every man on earth.    There is nothing like getting a hot girl face down, ass up, and smashing her onion.   

What does this give to the guys?   The best site on earth.  When you can see your cock sliding in and out, wedged between those breathtaking cheeks… when that booty meet shakes with each thrust, a slight ripple working through each one… wow.  I have a tear in my eye just thinking about it.   

In addition to the view, if the girl has warmed up to anal and can handle it, this is the position in which the guy can go his hardest.  The angle of his cock in her ass, especially if she puts her chest down on the bed, is such that it is a very, very smooth fit.   Her rectum is in its natural position.   So he can grab her hips and pound away.

For the girl, doggystyle anal can be either heaven or purgatory.   He’s going to be deep in your ass.   But in this position, he stimulates some of the nerves that are actually located in the vaginal wall.    If a girl is going to cum during anal, this position will probably be it.  While the guy is reaming her from behind, she’ll reach down and play with her clit.   If she can cum this way, it will be so intense her back might break.   

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THE BEST LAP DANCE EVER

This is yet another woman on top position.   The man sits in a chair.  Guys, use a kitchen chair, not a big ass recliner.  It gives you more range of motion.   The woman come and sits on his lap, with his man-meat in her moneymaker.  

There are two variations to this. The woman can put her legs between his legs.  If she does this, she can put her hands on his knees and bounce.  Or the woman can put her legs outside his.   Unless she has really long legs, she might not be able to bounce as well.  But she can grind and rock.    It’s a amazing sensation when you grind in that position, ladies!  It’s like you are trying to break our cock off inside your can.   

Guys, if she goes with her legs outside yours, why not reach around  and flick her on-off switch lightly.   It’s ether that your you make it rain!  

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THE 3AM AT DANIEL’S HOUSE

This is a variation on doggystyle - doing it while standing, with the woman bent over something.  It’s one of my favorites, hence the name.  (Back off!  When you get your own blog, you can name sex positions after yourself too!)

It’s a really comfortable position for the woman.   She’s braced on a chair or couch.  She might even be able to rest on it.   A variation is if she picks up one leg and rests her knee on the object.  A good example of that is a bathroom counter.  She leans over it and puts one knee up on it while I explore her third-entry.   

It’s great for the guy for the same reason doggystyle is.  It’s a nice view.  He can grab the hips and go hard.   Because it’s a comfortable position, it’s also great for prolonged anal.   There’s no need to pound out your nut in 30 seconds.  Get her in this position and spend a good 20 minutes working her bubble over.   

This position can also be very pleasurable for the woman too.  There is a muscle cluster that starts in your lower back, runs through the glutes, and down the back of the legs to the heel.  That’s why if you walk funny in a bad shoe, it can hurt your back.  It’s the longest muscle cluster in the human body.  When a girl is bent over like this, that muscle cluster is tight.   And so as she tenses her anus slightly (which is natural to do as your ass is being fucked), she’ll feel that through her entire lower body.   And guys, if you can reach around and play with her clit and make her cum in this position, she can collapse.  The shudder it sends through her legs literally floors her.  

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And there you have it, faithful readers.   Is this every anal position I know.  Please!  I’m Daniel Fucking Davis.   This is the tip of the iceberg.   But hopefully if you like these, you can put your own spins and variances on them, and have plenty of variety to your hot, hot booty sex!

Now, if you like this, please reblog!   Cause let’s face it.  This is good advice.  

Shibari Tutorial: Ankle or Wrist Slip Knot Restraint

Safety

Anatomy for Rope with IPcookiemonster Shibari Safety by DeGiotto Rope Shibari Safety by Esinem. (Part One) Part Two)

Beginner

How to Coil Rope by @ miniature-minx available for FREE download if you click the link for “get full video” Twisted Monk How-to: over a dozen beginner-friendly faves, including: karada (aka diamond harness or body harness) pentagram harness single column tie basic chest harness strapon harness basic hair tie

@ropebaby​‘s youtube channel, featuring: rope bra basic crotch rope Rope Corset and more!

How to Join Ropes by @wykd-dave​ Futomomo by Degiotto Rope Leg Corset by Ganraptor Hishi (Diamond) Leg Tie by EpicRope

Ties for Partners (Intermediate)

Tying the Wrists Up Behind the Neck by Topologist Hogtie by Twisted Monk Gyaku Tannuki by GanRaptor Hishi TK by EpicRope

Hip Harnesses (Intermediate/Advanced)

Dynamic Hip Harness by Moco Hip Harness by Nina Russ Tobutsuru Hip Harness by stefanobirdofprey Peach Tie by Tifereth

Advanced

Gote Shibari (also called a TK) by Esinem Tengu by Ganraptor Tengu Hishi by Ganraptor Armbinder by Ganraptor

Looking for tutorials? Blogs to follow? Want to figure out that one tie you saw at the dungeon last week? This post has got you covered – written to be accessible for complete newbies, with resources even old hats at rope bondage can appreciate be they bottom or top.

(1) Tutorial Websites and Videos  

Beautiful Bondage 

Cam Damage

Crash Restraint Website

Crash Restraint Youtube

deGiotto Rope

EpicRope

Esinem Website

Esinem Shibari Classes   

Evie Vane’s Videos 

Kinbaku Luxuria

Kinbaku Today 

Kink Academy  

Kissmedeadly Doll References

Miss Eris 

ReKink Rope Bondage Tutorials

Rope Baby  

Rope Connections

RopeTopia Resources

RVA Rope

Secondfloor Lotus Studio

Shibari.Ph Resources 

The Dutchy

The Twisted Monk

Two Knotty Boys Video Downloads

(2) Safety and Technique Information* 

* = most of the website and video list also covers safety information

Kinky Clover Rope Bottom Guide   

How to Be an Awesome Rope Bottom

A Guide For Rope Bottoms and Bondage Models 

Bondage Safety for Bottoms

Resources for Rope Bottoms 

Safety with Rope

BDSMWiki: Beginner Rope Bondage 

Blackout: What to Do When Someone Faints

Crash Restraint Rope Advice  

Fixing Problems Before They Happen

Free: Bondage Safety 

Rope Incident Reports

On Circulation 

On Nerve Damage 

Pain in Kinbaku

Nerves in Rope Bondage

Nerve Injury Reference Card 

Nerve Injury Treatment and Management

Remedial Ropes

Self-Suspension

Shibari.Ph: Read This Before Trying Bondage  

What is Shibari?

Who Can be Suspended?

(3) Books 

The Little Guide to Getting Tied Up by Evie Vane

Better Bondage for Every Body by Evie Vane

Rope Bondage The Smart Way: A Step By Step Guide To Using Rope Bondage In BDSM by Pete Riggs

Shibari You Can Use by Lee Harrington and RiggerJay

More Shibari You Can Use  by Lee Harrington and RiggerJay

Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes by Two Knotty Boys

Two Knotty Boys Back on the Ropes by Two Knotty Boys

The Seductive Art of Japanese Rope Bondage by Midori

The Beauty of Kinbaku by Master “K”

Essence of Shibari: Kinbaku and Japanese Rope Bondage  by Shin Nawakari

Rogue Hojojutsu by Douglas Kent

Complete Shibari Volume 1: Land by Douglas Kent

Complete Shibari Volume 2: Sky by Douglas Kent

Bondage For Sex by Chanta Rose

Tie Me Up! The Complete Guide to Bondage by Stephan Niederwieser 

(4) Tumblr Blogs  

@schwein-child , @goodmorningm0therfucker , @kissmedeadlydoll 

@camdamage  @ropebaby , @hornyropebunny @tohjiro 

@japanesebdsmofficial  @squirmforgood @evilthell, @amaury-grisel-shibari

@rumen-basheff , @kanan0690, @theropediary @jewelryandfire 

@cubicletocollar, @em-ties, @strictly-dirtyvonp, @secondfloor-fet

@gaping-lotus, @jesseflanagan, @nawayoi  @uncoiled-rope , @boshai, 

@tieduptee, @furi0usge0rge, @daddysprettypinkprincess, @shibarikuma, 

@daddyrigsme, @shaktibliss @nikolasromanov, @tied-yuno,  

@kinkyropecuriosity @danielriquelme-shibari  @tentesion, @wykd-dave, 

@ella-winters, @squirmforgood, @bondage-gifs, @master-rene-will, 

@orpheusblack, @alekzander-kinbaku, @misunguided  @untitledminor,

@tied-yuno, @kbnawa, @ropedisco, @cordineclubarchives, 

@tiedandtwisted420, @fred-rx, @skinny-redhead, @nikolasromanov, 

@enbydea, @neckropenightmare, @hangknot, @se7enbondage 

Tumblr blog list from @thebeautyofrope‘s awesome post because I simply could not do a better or more complete job myself

Hey Anon,

He’s likely talking about a “collaring” ceremony, which is the bdsm equivalent of a wedding or at the very least engagement, it usually is done by master/slave (but can be done by any dominant submissive variant) dynamic couples that are looking to get married/pledge themselves for a lifetime in real life as well.

The dominant/submissive dynamic traditionally would involve stages of the relationship that had their own protocol and would progressively get more and more involved. The stages tended to be:

Meeting - this is where you would meet and decide whether you’d like to participate is a “scene” (term for a session of time dedicated to bdsm activities) together, negotiate your terms/limits and the general idea behind what you want to do/achieve during the scene. This initial stage is removed from bdsm play so all parties refrain from using titles and any types of roleplay. 

Casual Play/Courting - Usually held in a bdsm dungeon that has a “Dungeon Master” (term for a individual with training and experience in the bdsm scene that enforces the rules of the dungeon on participants). Interested parties would usually move on to casual session together, if both parties are interested in becoming more involved they would then move onto the next step.

Consideration/Training - This can be considered the proposal of the bdsm Dominant/submissive world, whether the dominant will offer or the submissive will request that the other enter basically a trial period where the two work together to see if they would be compatible for a more long term and permanent relationship. This stage usually involves a temporary/play collar to make the occasion. that can be destroyed relatively easily if things don’t work out (collars tend to be very personal items in most bdsm relationship, on par with engagement/wedding rings, so there are different “classes” of them that people use). It also includes “training” to see if the submissive is “worthy” of the dominant, this usually translates into more d/s roleplay focusing of finding out if the two individuals kinks and interested match up and have synergy that would be conducive to a long term arrangement. The couple tends to establish more protocol and rules in this part of the relationship. If successful and the individuals agree to a long term arrangement they move to the next stage, if not they go their separate ways after destroying the training collar/dissolving their relationship.

Collaring - This is when the individuals would formally pledge themselves and involves a ceremony that tends to involve the community, similar to a wedding it has an exchange of vows and a more permanent collar is presented, a “contract” (non-legal/enforceable of course) is usually signed that states the rules/expectations/protocols that they individuals hashed out during the training/consideration phase. Both parties sign and celebrate the start of a new chapter in their relationship with their friends from the community.

This is an important and meaningful part of bdsm and should not be done lightly, it has lots of history within the bdsm community.  From what I gather you’re new to the scene so I would suggest doing a bit more research to see if this fits your situation:

http://www.submissiveguide.com/encyclopedia/collar/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collar_(BDSM)

http://www.submissiveguide.com/2012/05/what-it-means-to-be-collared/

https://fetlife.com/groups/190

That said everyone is different and all of this really is just part of the grand role-play/make believe that is kink, so all of it is flexible and adjustable to your tastes, talk to people in your local community and see if they have experiences with this and get a feel for what you want to get out of it.

Most importantly have fun and stay safe, don’t feel pressured and keep the communication open and honest :)

Sincerely,

beginner single rope reverse tension futo tutorial !

simple single column tutorial !

beginner two rope reverse tension leg binder tutorial !