It's just Photoshop, dear

In the dream I found a collection of Garfield comics that was at a yard sale. I buy it and bring it home, flipping through the pages.

Every other comic had Garfield as a tall, skinny, long hair and long beard hipster man. Also he was drawn in an entirely different art style, while the other characters, (Jon and Odie), were still rendered in the original style.

And there were no jokes. Just Garfield in this different style standing around with Jon and Odie in various different ways.

She saw me looking at her name tag, and her look was a pleasant smile with her eyes screaming please don’t , everyone mentions it.

When she went to the table behind mine, the couple said, “Oh! Your parents must have loved Fleetwood Mac!”

And she replied (as I’m certain she does about twenty times a day), “Yes it was my parents wedding song.”

My then-boss (lets call him Henry) was talking about his troupe of Navy Cadets. He is some sort of Captain on evenings and weekends. Part of his job is training teenagers by taking them on drills for some kind of naval exercises on the lake.

He mentioned one of the teenage cadets was (as he assumed) gay, and Henry was giving him extra attention and encouraging the kid. He then says he wishes one of his sons would come out so he had always wanted a gay kid.

Which basically just shut the rest of the conversation down. We gaped at him.

Let's break this down:

Giving extra attention to a teenage boy who Henry doesn't know if or if not the kid is gay is not appropriate. Big no. Be supportive to everyone, be kind. If kid comes to you for help, be good to that kid.

Wishing your kid was gay, and saying you'd be disappointed if he was not, that is fuuuuucked up. I shouldn't even have to say why. Be a good ally, be a good parent, but wishing any sexuality on your child is uncomfortably strange. (just think of what you'd be saying if he'd wished his gay kid was straight)

Especially since... come on... being anywhere on the 2SLGBTQIA+ landscape makes life a little less easy. Even just a little bit.

And we have Henry. A late 40's, straight, cis, Caucasian man, trying his hardest to be as accepting as possible inadvertently turning his acceptance in offensive stereotyping...

AND he felt like sharing this to his colleagues at a work function.

I NEED someone else's perspective on this.

And my brain got kind of crossed.

And I put in my deodorant instead…

Like… my brain told me, “Smelly, do something.”

And the body goes, “Ok, doing something.”

So if a conversation was something like, “Okay barachiki, here is your receipt, you have ten days to return it.” I might reply, “Rock and roll!” As if to say ‘that’s great, thank you.’

I also (though less frequently now) use the word ‘swish’ to describe something as ‘excellent’. As in “The new computer I got is actually pretty swish.”

Neither of these are common parlance. I often forget that. And I think this came from a period of my life when I wanted to reduce the usage of the word “awesome” in my vocabulary.

This is because when I was a university student I felt like awesome meaning being ‘struck by wonder and amazement’ was being overtaken by meaning ‘anything good’.