🦇 Bangsinc 🦇

A man’s deepest fear lies in his own inadequacy, and there was never a man so inadequate as Jonathan Crane.

His love is a festering sore that serves only to infect and spread the moment it’s attempted to be removed by sheer force alone. His affections with Sherry Squires were not out of love, but rather the idea that he could gain acceptance from his peers by dating the most popular girl in his class. He did not care who she was—he cared for what she stood for —and that mindset of looking at people had been ingrained in Jonathan since birth. There was little hesitation in killing Sherry the moment her usefulness ran dry. He seldom thinks of her now.

Despite his skewed perception of relationships, he is no fool. He understands when what he feels for someone extends the primal urges of lust or greed, though he had attempted to ignore any modicum of affection he may have felt in favor of focusing on his life’s work. Love may wither and fade, but fear will never die.

That said, this wouldn’t be an x reader if he didn’t fall in love with you.

He can only truly become attracted to someone that he sees himself in. He’s quick to mark an individual in his mind as a ‘bully’ should they fit the narrow criteria he’s made in his mind.

The way Jonathan carries himself when he first approaches you is nothing short of cunning. He has no physical appeal to any stranger he may come across, so what he lacks in appearances he makes up for in his language. His voice is a deep, velvety gait and he could surely make even the most terrifying of threats sound like a ballad.

He is classy—a gentleman, at best—and lets you feel as if you are just as in control of the conversation as he is. He wants to see what you are—if you’re even worth his time. He is nothing short of picky and obsessive, so branching off of fear to even speak to you is an accomplishment in of itself.

Dates are inexpensive and lacking. Jonathan had to rent the suit he used for teaching and likely couldn’t put the funds together for anything lavish. He’d much prefer an intimate night in, anyways. Something closed off from the world, where he can bask in the affections he’s believed he’s waited far too long for. Hes certainly smug about it.

I think he’d make it a small mission to help his partner with their own fears. He believes himself to be free of any phobia known to man, and such a state of mind had come with countless hours of studying and mastering the art of fear. If he is fearless, then you must be fearless.

He would not be a big fan of his partner's friends. He wouldn’t isolate his partner, but he simply would never wish to interact with them. He has his tastes in people, which narrow down to him and his better half.

Take Sherry Squires — he truly only liked the idea of her. He liked the fantasy of being with the ‘most popular’ girl in school to compensate for the bullying he’d been tormented with. His affections were, ultimately, shallow. He claims ‘it’ was all he’d ever wanted when she leaned in to him, not that ‘she’ was all he’d ever wanted, after all.

He is emotionally stagnant and cannot cope with negative feelings without resorting to violence or revenge. If he feels as if his partner betrayed him in some way, their relationship would come to a rather melodramatic ending fairly quickly.

He likes someone he can insert himself into—a woman, or a man who has deep turmoil of their own. Someone who holds the same rage he’d been bottling up since his high school years. That, and someone intelligent. He won’t bother with an individual who holds no interest in literature and the finer things in life—he needs someone who can keep up with him intellectually.

With handwriting as elegant and formal as his, he only deems it a satisfactory ego boost to write and send his partner love letters, signed by various aliases to give some extra personal flair. His words are flowery and poetic, and he’d much rather prefer a sonnet than holding hands. In his letters, his more intimate, true feelings show. He’d be simply enraged if they didn’t keep them.

He doesn’t mind sitting silently with the person he’s fond of. Playing chess, cooking, or organizing ‘things’ are his ideal date ideas. He can’t afford to take his partner out, but might begrudgingly take them somewhere on a special occasion.

Doesn’t tolerate insults in relation to his partner for a multitude of reasons. An insult to his ‘better half’ is an insult to him, and therefore an insult to the master of fear himself. Some part of him, additionally, can’t stand seeing someone he’s fond of go through the same treatment he’d been through. He won’t dare have himself humiliated again, and the same can thankfully be applied to his love.

He’s got a quick temper, but is quick to ‘apologize’ in his own way—with overcompensating acts of affection. He cares, but isn’t sure how to care about something that doesn’t revolve around his own desires. He can be stubborn, but his stubbornness is only as strong as his need for his partner.

The more his partner stays with him, the fonder his heart grows. The more he catches himself thinking of them without the need for something specific.