My Life In Pictures

Green Day: Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn

Aries: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year 

There’ll be moshpits for hosting

Souls for toasting

And screamo singing out in the snow

There’ll be scary Krampus stories

And tales of the horrors of the

Christmases long, long ago

Taurus: Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree 

Shopping around the Christmas Tree

at the Department Shop

A sale sign hung where you can see

Every shopper tries to stop

Rockin’ around the Christmas Tree

Let the cash registers ring

Later we’ll buy some pumpkin pie

and we’ll continue buying

Gemini: Sleigh Ride 

Just hear those annoying sleigh bells jingling, ring ting tingling, too

Don’t go, it’s horrible weather for a sleigh ride together with you

Outside the snow is falling and enemies are calling, “Screw you!”

Come on, it’s terrible weather for a sleigh ride together with you

Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up, don’t go

Let’s look at the show, we’re riding in a crapload of snow

Giddy yap, giddy yap, giddy yap, it’s terrible even holding your hand

We’re dragging along with a song of a wintery wasteland

Cancer: Winter Wonderland 

Sleigh bells ring are you listening

In the lane snow is melting

A nasty sight oh we’re miserable tonight

Walking in a winter wasteland

Gone away is the bluebird

Here to stay is a new bird

He’s screeching a song as we go along

Walking in a winter wasteland

Leo: Jingle Bell Rock 

What a bright time, it’s the right time

To rock the night away.

Jingle-bell time is a swell time

To go glidin’ in a one-horse sleigh.

Giddy-yap jingle horse; pick up your feet;

Jingle around the clock.

Mix and mingle in a jinglin’ beat;

That’s the jingle-bell rock.

*Karen kicks radio by accident*

Virgo: White Christmas 

I’m dreaming of a red Christmas

Just like the ones I used to know

Where the treetops are bare and children listen

To hear screaming in the snow

I’m dreaming of a red Christmas

With every Christmas card I write

May your days have fright and spite

And may all your Christmases be red

Libra: All I want for Christmas 

I want a lot for Christmas

There are just so many things I need

I care about the presents

Underneath the Christmas tree

I don’t want you for my own

More than you could ever know

Make my wish come true oh

All I want for Christmas isn’t you

Scorpio: Deck the Halls 

Deck the halls with balls of holly,

Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Tis the season to take molly,

Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Don we now our American Apparel,

Fa la la, la la la, la la la.

Troll the ancient internet with carol,

Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Sagittarius: Feliz Navidad 

Feliz Cumpleaño

Feliz Cumpleaño

Feliz Cumpleaño

Prospero año y felicidad

I wanna wish you a Happy Birthday

I wanna wish you a Happy Birthday

I wanna wish you a Happy Birthday

From the bottom of my fart

Capricorn: It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas 

It’s beginning to look too much like Christmas

Everywhere you go

Take a look at the driveway, snowed in once again

With candy canes and heart burn aglow

It’s beginning to look too much like Christmas

Toys in every store

But the worst sight to see is the family that will be

At your own front door

Aquarius: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer 

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Had a very stuffy nose

And if you ever saw it

You would even say it blows

All of the other reindeer

used to laugh and call him names

They never let stuffy Rudolph

Join in any reindeer games

Pisces: Frosty the Snowman 

Frosty the Snowman

Is a fraud, they say

He was made of snow but the children know

How he went to hell one day

There must have been some magic

In that old musty hat they found

For when they threw it on his head