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as the blame somehow shifted to her when it wasn't even her fault, jada could only stand there, frozen in place and stunned at the venom in evelyn's words as she stopped right in front of the door. "how the fuck is this my fault?" she practically shrieked in shock, evelyn's words doing little else besides throwing her for a loop the more she talked. "so you think just because this almost happened with my ex, this is somehow my fault?" she blinked. even if they didn't need to be married to each other-- and both clearly didn't want it, evelyn's words about them not even being good girlfriends had stunned jada into silence for a few minutes as she just let the woman say her piece. "anything else you want to add while you treat me like a piece of shit right to my face?" she just sighed, throwing her hands up in resignation. for as often as they'd argued like this and things tended to blow up, the good moments usually outweighed the bad, but this was the worst jada had ever seen it. "you know what? when we get home, we're done. i mean it." she huffed.

"don't fucking pretend like we were going good in our relationship. we're always fucking circling back and forth. the honeymoon phase only lasts a week before shit crumbles." in moments evelyn really did believe they had the chance to make something real out of their love for one another and other times it faltered. every single time it was her fault, but her ego would never let her admit that. evelyn groaned before rolling her eyes, scoffing at jada saying she was done once they got back home. "i'm sure you mean it," her tone sarcastic before she removed the cheap metal off her ring finger. evelyn ran her hand through her hair as she made her way towards her suitcase, "you know what. let's not even wait for our flights in a couple days - let's go home now. you don't have to wait to be done, we're done now." that was her way of trying to control the situation, not wanting jada to decide when their relationship ended. "you're going to have to use your pto at work before i want you to send in your resignation letter, fuck it, you can quit on the spot if you want."

once she'd gotten dressed into something beyond appropriate and put little effort into the rest of her look, sasha had made her way to the office, spending a few minutes in her car trying to remember to breathe, before she finally walked inside. it seemed fine at first, mostly because she saw al and some of the other old timers and they simply greeted her as they did every morning. but the second she saw grace, and then jake, it suddenly felt like they stopped the conversations they were having and just honed in on her, watching her head for her desk like they were waiting for her to fuck up. sasha could assume that grace had said something to jake, or vice versa, but she didn't know if they'd told anyone else about their suspicions. as she put herself down at her desk, she could feel more eyes on her, almost like everyone knew what was going on. that pretty much solidified which option she should take, so taking a deep breath, she headed over to evelyn's office. seeing no reason to knock, sasha let herself in and then didn't bother closing the door this time. "i'll probably regret this, but let's just get this over with." she stated, sighing under her breath as she said the words out loud. "have they come to you yet? because we might as well just go to their office and confess now while everyone is staring daggers at me anyway."

evelyn’s attention was shifted towards her door as sasha barged right in. she noticed a few wandering eyes trying to catch a glimpse of what was erupting in her office. evelyn hated that. her office was the one place where she expected privacy. no matter who entered, it was common knowledge that you closed the door behind you - sasha didn’t even spare it a second glance. it was clear she was fed up with everything. “yeah and those daggers are now aiming directly inside my office,” evelyn sighed before rising out of her seat. in a swift movement she got up to close her office door before shaking her head. “we need to go confess after we’ve taken a few deep breaths. you’re already letting everyone in the office get the best of you and we don’t need to add any more fuel to the fire.” her voice stayed calm before confessing, “the whole office knows. i know why you feel like everyone’s watching, it’s because they are. i just want us to walk out of here with our heads held high.” walking back over to her desk to lock her desktop, evelyn made her way over to sasha. her hand comforted her by rubbing her arm, “we can confess. i know last night we agreed to lay low, but i felt their eyes on me as well. i thought it was a good idea because i don’t need these assholes thinking you tried sleeping your way up - they’re going to think that regardless. it’s obvious. so we confess, get it over with, and i’ll literally kill anyone who tries to give you shit.” of course it was evelyn being dramatic, but a piece of her felt like she would do that for sasha.

"do you like her more than you like me?"

reaching a hand out to rest against char's shoulder evelyn reminded the girl. "you're not only gorgeous, you're intelligent too. don't let jealously get the best of you...it could tear down everything we've managed to build together."

sasha furrowed her brows at evelyn's words, which sounded like the woman believed she'd outgrown any of that between then and now. "your mother was right, but i bet she didn't expect you to still be both of those things even as an old woman. i think you're actually more over the top with the dramatics now than you probably were as a kid." she teased, though there was definitely some truth behind her words. after all, the smallest inconvenience sent the woman into a frenzy, so surely she wasn't this bad as a kid. she had even been a little dramatic before about their current situation, yet as she pondered over sasha's friends opinion, she at least sounded like she was being more practical now. sasha still didn't know what to do, but as she listened to the older woman, she knew that everyone might be right, to an extent. "it's not gonna be easier for me either way. if we don't come clean, they're going to be watching us, waiting to see if they can find proof that we're obviously up to something. it also doesn't help that we don't know who went to hr to begin with, so that's another set of eyes to worry about. but if we do come clean, they might get rid of me, or keep me with restrictions while the whole office will only see me as the employee who tried to sleep her way to the top — and can't even reach the top now." it was fucked either way, so sasha wasn't sure how she was supposed to make a decision. "maybe we should just sleep on it? see how i, or we, feel in the morning?"

evelyn loved getting ready with sasha in the mornings. they never had to awkwardly shuffle past one another while getting ready. if anything, if evelyn ever needed help looking more presentable, sasha would be there to help. it was the small things that evelyn loved. it made her crave for her mornings to always be like this. "i'll head into the office a bit early, so i am going to have to take my bagel to go." she smiled before giving sasha a quick peck on the lips. "wish us luck today." luck she knew they were going to need - at least evelyn. entering the building, she gave her usual greetings before she headed into her office. she didn't know what it was, but she felt as if everyone's eyes were burning into her back. was it her own paranoia getting to her? or did the whole office already know what was at hand. settling into her work, there was a knock on her door before she could respond to an email. welcoming them in, there was the lead of the hr department standing there in her office. they had asked her if they were able to speak sometime today and evelyn shrugged her shoulders, almost playing dumb. "i don't see why not. i need to get to send out some important things before heading to your office." agreeing, they left and a small panic sat in the pit of her stomach. she knew sasha and her had agreed to playing it cool, but in the moment she felt like confessing was the best route. unlocking her phone she sent a quick text to sasha: i think confessing will help us in the long run. they want to meet with me soon.

"that's not why i'm upset." she was essentially cornered now. every attempt to evade this conversation would be futile, she was sure. god, she felt so childish. evelyn spoke, and she felt like a spoiled little girl receiving a scolding. "that's not my issue." a pause. fuck. she needed to summon what little courage she had left. "do you promise to be honest with me?" and without waiting for a response, charlie finally spilled her guts out. "i don't know why, but i have this horrible feeling gnawing at me, telling me you're—that you're cheating."

"what have i done to give you this feeling? hm?" the only logical thing evelyn could think about was taking calls while she was spending time with charlie - calls from her assistant. the assistant that was clearly trying her hardest to have a chance with her and evelyn thought of it as a fun little game. "it's my calls with sophie isn't it?" evelyn stood from the bed and placed her hands on her hips before looking down at her girlfriend. her chest started to race a little faster before she let the truth spill from her mouth. "i've never fucked or kissed sophie, but yes...i entertain her cheap little flirts. so i wouldn't say i'm cheating on you, but you take that as you will."

evelyn's offer for her to take the day off was just a bittersweet reminder of the theories charlie had been torturing herself with for weeks. she had no real evidence, no concrete proof. all she had was a collection of heavy suspicions. feelings, nothing else. like the prick on the back of her neck whenever evelyn answered a work call in her presence. the knot that formed in the pit of her stomach every time evelyn had to work late. the more these little shifts piled up, the more charlie's spirit wore out. "i don't think you truly want to do that," charlie murmured, hiding her face once more.

the older woman didn't know if she could bit her tongue any longer. she knew if she didn't press the girl, they'd end up going in circles. a cycle that would become toxic and too much for evelyn to stay and try to work through. "you're upset because of me working, is that it? i've told you before that my job requires a lot from me, so i can't be here all the time and there are times where i need to be in my own office to get things done. but if you need me here, i will do my best to work from home."

she was so embarrassed. charlie wished she could act like the adult woman she was supposed to be and face evelyn. instead, she hid. avoidance was a vice of hers. and while she'd made some improvements in that department over the years, slip-ups still happened. she was inherently too self-serving for her own good; it required a consious effort for charlie to look past the boundaries of her own tunnel vision. and for evelyn, she'd done that and more. but the machinery in her brain was starting to show some rust, hence her recent behavior. "i... don't know." it wasn't a lie. she couldn't come up with a proper explanation. how could she translate the jumbled mess in her head and turn it into actual words? evelyn's touch was a quiet comfort, something that allowed charlie to finally look up after a couple of ragged breaths. "i don't want you to leave." a sniffle. "i'm sorry. i c-can't explain what's wrong with me."

"i'll stay," evelyn spoke softly before a sigh followed. the woman didn't know what she was supposed to do. she knew being there would probably be enough, but her own inner dialogue rambled in her head. there were clear signs that another woman wanted her. that knowledge was enough to inflate evelyn's ego - she loved the feeling of being wanted. and as of lately, charlie wasn't the one giving her that feeling. her late nights at work involved the other woman. nothing happened between them, but there was an obvious tension arising and she wondered if char had caught onto that. evelyn knew that information had to be kept from the younger woman, seeing her reaction to her own thoughts sent her into a spiral. these nights started to feel repetitive to evelyn, all the two of them would do was exchange a few words and lay next to one another until they drifted off. "when you get an idea of why you're so upset, speak freely. i'll be here with you." pulling her phone out of her pocket, she leaned over to place it on the nightstand. her hand finding its way onto charlie again. "if you'd like, i can stay home from work tomorrow?"

oh, how times change. not too long ago, charlie waited for her visits eagerly. slaved over the kitchen, wanting to play the role of the perfect partner so her favorite ceo could forget about the troubles she had to face at work and unkind. charlie's devotion towards evelyn was admirable. now though? she wasn't certain as to what had changed. had been clearer in her head, she would've been happy to accept the blame. but she was troubled by confusion, unable to pinpoint exactly what had changed. she had her suspicions, of course. feared evelyn had grown tired of her, and reacted to this by letting her spirts drop so low she could not bring herself to leave her bed. so yes, charlotte felt called out by evelyn's observation. cue the tears, which she attempted to hide by burying her face in her plush pillow. yes, she'd spent the entire day in bed. and no, she would not be admitting to it. "i'm sorry." a beat. "i'm sorry you're so dissatisfied with me."

they was a faint break in char's voice that evelyn was able to catch as the younger woman buried her face into her pillow. she knew the waterworks started to happen. evelyn got up from the chair and quietly sat on the edge of the bed. for a second she hesitated to touch charlotte. she didn't know if her tears would become a waterfall and she didn't know if she would reject the innocent touch. however, her hand gave in by offering comfort by rubbing her back slowly. "you don't need to apologize. i just need to know why you've been acting this way?" evelyn knew if it continued like this, she wouldn't have the patience to stick around any longer. if it were anyone else, evelyn would have been long gone, but she cared deeply for her. that was the honest truth. "look, i can go back home if that makes you feel any better." her hand stopped comforting her and fell into her own lap. many thoughts ran through her head, too many to really pinpoint on.

tw    :   kissing    ,    drinking    ,    flashing    .

"sorry. i didn't hear you come in." they had full access to her townhouse. she'd grown accustomed to waiting for them to show up and jump into their arms, but lately, those visits had become a RARITY. she barely lifts her head from her pillow as she shoots them a glance. charlotte's usual manic energy is gone, replaced by an ACHE she can't figure out the cause of. "i figured you wouldn't come so i did not make dinner. sorry."

appearing at char's place randomly wasn't something out of the ordinary. however, lately every time she stepped into her home there was this wave of bad energy that overcame evelyn - she didn't feel welcomed. "it's fine," she muttered before she took a seat across from her lover. evelyn glanced towards the floor and didn't know if now was the right time to bring up the obvious tension between the two of them. usually evelyn was over as often as she could be, even if she was swamped with work, she tried her best to be at charlotte's side. now she maintained a distance to keep work and her love-life separated. "did you eat anything? or have you been in that exact spot for hours?" her eyebrows perked up, "every time i come over...you're in this mood."

after crawling into bed to wait for evelyn, sasha had at least texted her group chat with her friends again to give them a brief update on the whole hr thing, which only added to her stress as their responses started to trickle in. by the time the older woman joined her, she simply sighed as she put her phone over on her night stand. "i forgot about that one, actually. found it under the sink this morning and just decided to give it a shot." she admitted as evelyn leaned in closer, and she rolled her eyes playfully at her usual antics. "has anyone ever told you that you're extremely cheesy?" she knew she said it quite often, but she wasn't sure if natalie, or whoever evelyn dated before that, had gotten this side of her, but surely sasha wasn't the first. glancing over as evelyn laid down on her least favorite pillow, she simply shrugged about the wet hair. "babe, it's fine. and i will help fix your hair in the morning." accepting the kiss to her forehead, sasha leaned in closer as she laid her head on evelyn's shoulder. "speaking of tomorrow morning, my friends are convinced that if either of us blows off work, hr will just take that as confirmation that something is going on. they also said we should have saw this coming and that it would be easier to just deal with it, but what do you think?"

"actually the first person to tell me i was cheesy is my own mother." she chuckled before shrugging her shoulders, "apparently when i was a child i was overly-dramatic and a dork." evelyn rolled her eyes knowing sasha was going to have some come-back ready to roll off her tongue. her hand innocently fell on sasha's side as a smile curved onto her lips. she found it sweet how sasha was so willing to help her with her appearance. evelyn didn't know if she was just completely immersed in the other woman, but she found it sweeter than anything. something so simple had a lot of care attached to it. "they make a good point," she looked up at the ceiling and thought about it some more. "i guess that does scream guilty if both of us don't show up to the office after hr approached you." humming softly she tried thinking about it before sasha shared what else her friends thought. "would it be easier for you to deal with it though? as fucked up as it is, not much will happen to me the way things will happen to you and your job. i'd rather leave that decision to you. if we confess or not confess, i'm willing to maintain myself if that's what you need. we can both show up to the office tomorrow, i agree we should do that - that just means we actually need to get sleep tonight." the older woman pouted teasingly before trailing her fingertips up sasha's body. "they might be right with confessing so we can get this over with rather than letting it drag up and having to stress about getting caught up."

at the lack of concern for her, jada stiffened up and shook her head, snatching the certificate out of evelyn's hand. "what the fuck?!" she shouted involuntarily, then immediately came to regret it as her head pounded harder. "shit, i was about to ask the same thing." she groaned. "i mean, i wasn't ready for marriage yet! i told myself i wouldn't even think about marriage until i'm like, thirty five!" watching evelyn clearly trying to find some way to blame her-- she could tell by that frustrated, scrutinizing look on her face, jada let out a huff of her own. "i need some fucking air." she groaned and tossed her clothes back on, then scurried to the bathroom to splash some water on her face before making a beeline for the door. "no, no no no. this can't be fucking happening."

if anything, evelyn sat there with complete anger taking over her expression. watching the way jada was freaking out was only more evident the two of them weren't nowhere near close to tying the knot together. the older woman dragged her hands over her face before getting up to go after jada, "breathing fresh air isn't going to help. we're going to need to go through the process of - fuck, i guess getting a divorce. nothing despises me more than marriage, now i'm a fucking married woman. and i just know there's no way in hell i was the one who suggested going to the fucking chapel. if anything jada, it was probably you. you've mentioned how you and your ex almost got hitched in vegas - we don't need to be married to each other. we don't - we aren't even good girlfriends." evelyn was clearly letting everything roll off of her mind freely. the mix of a hangover and nerves overtook her.

"ah you see, they one-hundred percent would. the press loves twisting nothing into everything. that's what they're best at because how else are they supposed to make money, if not trying to sabotage one's career. that's why i care, it matters to me because apparently i'm a hot topic right now - i feel completely blessed, but there's a lot of cons to being in the spotlight that people don't talk about." catherine knew she had to seal her mouth shut before she sounded ungrateful for the opportunities she had, but juniper seemed like a woman that could handle the truth. her eyes followed where juniper's lead, "it is exhausting, very actually." catherine's focus landed in the eyes of the woman standing before her. she didn't know what it was, but there was a small bit of intimidation sitting in her stomach when talking to this powerful woman. she didn't know if she should keep her guard up, but from her own intuition, juniper seemed trustworthy. if anything she seemed to be the first person at any event she attended with her own honest thoughts. "you're right and it's nice that you're able to recognize that. the only time i get to truly be myself is in the comfort of my own home - god i just sound like a delight huh?" she chuckled before admitting, "this is nice though. you're probably the first person who wanted to have a genuine conversation. everyone just asks what my next project is and...it really puts in perspective how wrapped up these people are. everyone is self-centered, two-faced, and fu - it doesn't matter. all i'm trying to say is, anytime i've directed conversations into personal life interests, it never goes the way i want."

she couldn't help but to laugh at evelyn's words. they weren't funny , per se. it's how this back and forth had just sounded silly. they were both two grown women who seemed to have a hard time communicating when the whole part of adulthood was being able to say what you mean and mean what you say , and also to not be scared anymore. " this is ridiculous," she muttered. she wasn't sure if she was talking to her own thoughts or to evelyn. " look at us bickering like we in high school," she blurted out completely. this time she looked at evelyn with much compassion that was mixed with a look of apology. " eves, im sorry." she let out a sigh. " i ain't mean to go off on you like that. it ain't a big deal." maybe a little bit. " i was caught off guard seeing you talk to her like that. i guess i was a lil jealous , even if we ain't together like that. " she shrugged her shoulders. " this dating stuff , it's new to me since my ex and i divorced. i haven't been completely serious about anyone since her. "

there was almost a sigh of relief that escaped evelyn's mouth. the atmosphere around them seemed to change. evelyn felt like she could keep her guard down and that helped relax her into her seat. "it's alright. i understand why you witnessing that would make you upset." the woman felt her throat tighten as odessa confessed there was a little bit jealously at play. while it was obvious from the ignored calls and texts, hearing it from her added a whole new meaning. what did that mean for the two of them? evelyn was so worried about losing odessa and odessa seemed to have jealously brewing in her. the older woman confessed, "yeah, i also haven't felt as attached to another woman in a while. i've told you plenty of times, i think the two of us mesh well because we don't really have big expectations for one another. everything really feels like it's just go with the flow and when this problem arose...it made me sit there and think whatever is happening between us..." she stopped momentarily and shrugged her shoulders not knowing if this was the right time, but what time would be? "it just seems we've really developed a connection with each other. it's nice."