I see...

Thelma and Louise are 1-month-old twin goats and they love to jump from high places. Note: No goats were harmed in the making of this photo… but one photographer slightly was when they landed :) .

-so much desert that you will get scared 

-seriously from california to new mexico is terrifying like it’s eight straight hours of pale red desert and the sky is so large that everything, even your car, even your hands, looks like a tenuously small and fragile diorama placed on an endless pale red table and left there to dissolve. 

-a gas station that for some reason has large dinosaurs made out of scrap metal. they are 1000% awesome. sometimes they move. take a million pictures.

-a fruit stand that sells the best fruit you have ever eaten. later you won’t quite remember which fruit. strawberries, maybe? peaches?

-small black birds, subtly different in every state. some have gold eyes and some are a little iridescent and some are black from beak to toes. the sparrows they compete with for crumbs look exactly the same wherever you go. 

-a completely empty rest stop. no one eats at the concrete tables. no one plays in the tiny strip of grass or gravel. you will find a small and beautiful stone. 

-a hawaii license plate, somewhere around ohio. i still don’t know how they get the cars across the ocean. i don’t know why anyone would leave hawaii for ohio. i don’t know why anyone lives in ohio. 

-an incredibly weird duck. you had no idea ducks could look so incredibly weird, and you wish you were still ignorant of how incredibly weird ducks can, apparently, look. 

-a small folksy roadside waystation that sells fudge and incredibly tacky statues of eagles and wolves and cowboys. if you like fudge, eat the fudge from here. 

-a lizard doing pushups. if you are particularly fortunate: many lizards doing pushups.

-approximately one gajillion starbucks shops. don’t bother counting them. it will make you angry. 

-a storm somewhere around oklahoma, if you’re lucky. the clouds tower up in fantastic fluffy castles miles and miles into the air and are painted pink and gold and purple and the sky turns a dozen impossible shades of blue and when the rain comes down over your car it sounds like the world is ending. 

-weird burrs will stick to your legs. you’ll flick them out of the car eighty or eight hundred miles from where their parent plant was grown, and not be sure whether you should wish the little hitchikers well or not. 

-a dog wearing sunglasses with his head hanging out of a car window. this will be the high point of the trip. 

-the world’s most depressing restaurant. you will know it when you wind up there and have to eat the terrible food, and listen to the terrible music, and look at all the listless waiters and want to tell them get in my car, for god’s sake get in, i’ll take you out of whatever crapsack little town this is that you can’t get out of on your own. but you won’t say that because it’s rude. maybe they have family here. maybe they even like it here.

-a painting of a sailboat in a motel located at least a hundred miles from any significant body of water. 

-several genuinely hilarious postcards. buy them.

-a cat that will not let you pet it. this will be the low point of the trip. 

-corn. so much corn you will get scared. who the fuck is going to eat all this corn? 

I got 99 problems and 98 of them are completely my fault

1) Change your profile picture to a cute selfie together. Just make sure that your lady friend knows that you’re snapping a picture. Sneak attack selfies aren’t cute….

2) Wear swag with her on it: Nothing says “I love you” like plastering a cat’s face on your clothes! 

3) Take her to yoga: Just make sure to pull the instructor aside before class begins; it’s important for them to know that “downwards dog” is a trigger word. Meoww-maste.

4) Buy her something nice: Get her in the car, but don’t tell her where you’re going. Everyone loves a good surprise. Once you arrive at Petsmart make sure to put the harness on so that her excitement doesn’t get the best of her. Wondering what to get her? May we suggest a new toy, a new treat flavor, or maybe just a trip to the grooming section to get a little pampered. You can never go wrong with a day of shopping and relaxation for your lady.

5) Break out the treats: Chicken-flavored Meow Mix munchies may not be your thing, but it’s sure to pleasure her inner goddess. As they say, the surest way to her heart is through her stomach.

ping’anguo (平安果, the fruit of peace)

What Love means to a 4-8 year old: A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, ’What does love mean?’  The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined  

See what you think:

‘When my grandmother got arthritis , she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore.. So my grandfather does it for her all the time , even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.’ – Rebecca, age 8  ‘When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.’ – Billy, age 4  ‘Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.’ – Karl, age 5  ‘Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.’ –Chrissy, age 6  ‘Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.’ -Terri, age 4  ‘Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him , to make sure the taste is OK.’ – Danny, age 7  ‘Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing , you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that.  They look gross when they kiss’ – Emily, age 8  ‘Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents  and listen.’ –Bobby, age 7 ‘If you want to learn to love better , you should start with a friend who you hate” –Nikka, age 6  ‘Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt , then he wears it everyday..’ –Noelle, age 7  ‘Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.’ –Tommy, age 6  ‘During my piano recital , I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.’ – Cindy, age 8  ‘My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.’ –Clare, age 6  ‘Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.’ –Elaine, age 5  ‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.’ –Chris, age 7  ‘Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.’ -Mary Ann, age 4  ‘I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.’ –Lauren, age 4  ‘When you love somebody , your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.’ - Karen, age 7  ‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t think it’s gross..’ –Mark, age 6  ‘You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.’ –Jessica, age 8