Avery didnât really know where to begin with this conversation with Ava; he felt like there was so much he needed to tell her and not enough time to get it all out. Given that he was a pack leader and therefore responsible for making sure that everyone under him was taken care of properly, he didnâtâŚget the chance to socialize with many other werewolves very often; he loved those under his charge, of course, but it was like a familial love. He didnât go out drinking with them or sit around having dinner parties with his friends and their loversâthose were activities that only those with less responsibility and obligations as him were granted. He almost felt like he was stuck on a different planet from the rest of them; like he was surrounded by duty and honor and all the other bullshit that occasionally came along with his title as an alpha. GodâŚhe couldnât even manage to remember the last time heâd allowed himself a night out just to have a beer or two and talk to a friend.
That was where Ava came in. The two might have shared aâŚphysically intimate past with one another, and they might have drifted apart and stopped speaking with one another as much after Avery aligned himself with the humans (he knew she disapproved of it; he could feel it in his gut), butâŚshe was still the closest thing to a confidant he had. He trusted Ava in ways that couldnât be explained, and though the conversation topic might be a bit awkward given their past together, he could think of no one else to go to about it.
No one who would even attempt to understand, at least.
He was afraid at first, actually, that sheâd turn him away; after all, they hadnât exactly been on theâŚfriendliest of terms with one another in the past few months. He didnât blame Ava if she felt slightly anxious about joining sides with the humans; after all, sheâd been one once and after she was bitten, the lot of them decided to turn their backs on her. It was utterly disgraceful and horrifying, and Avery could understand why his friend, pack mate, and former lover would be hesitant to place her name next to a species that had scorned her for being changed into something other than human. He understood all of thisâall of her potential hesitancy and aversionâbut he didnât think her disgust for what they had done should have completely blurred the line for her between what was right and what was wrong. Avery wasnât a fool; he saw prejudice everywhere he looked. He saw prejudice for how heâd obtained his position; for his species; for his race. He saw prejudice everywhere he lookedâŚbut at the end of the day, he still knew the difference between what was right and what was wrong. Why didnât Ava seem to?
He sighed in relief when Ava chose instead to provide him with a beer (per his request), opening herself up to conversation. For whatever their differences were, she was still his friendâŚthat was good to know.Â
"Thanks," he said quietly, trying to force himself to remain upbeat (which was easier said than done, given the circumstances). He reached for his mug, taking a sip of his beer and relishing in the dark, delicious flavor of it. Licking the froth from his lips, he sighed heavily and directed his attention back towards Ava. He could only put this conversation off for so long, after all.
"âŚI did something; I think I really fucked up," he continued, his voice quiet and pained. He dragged his finger along the rim of his mug, staring into the dark liquid and attempting to collect his thoughts. Grunting in aggravation, Avery lifted his eyes to lock onto Avaâs, scanning her face and trying to predict how sheâd take the news. "The night of the masquerade ballâŚI slept with a human. An eighteen year old human.â
