*THREE POISONS

this jc is mixed-canon, and obviously heavily headcanon-based

card in his hands, he's biting his cheek. all he lets slip out is a sharp exhale through the nose, before his gaze turns back to the braces, then to claude. "these are--thank you." he straightens his posture, just a little, smiling tightly. "they're"--perfect, thoughtful--"stunning."

    she presses a scaled head on top of your own. like she’s sizing up the person you have brought to see her. ❝ it’s similar to horses. you swing a leg over into the saddle or in this case behind it so you can hang on to me. while i keep her going. she’s a little on the fiesty side. but she’s a rly nice ride. very steady. sometimes i can shoot arrows from her back. ❞

     ❝ well come along this way and i’ll tell you all about miss baklava on the way there.  ❞ . and maybe you step just a little bit faster than you normally would. not quite a run but definitely a half jog at least. and you lead him towards the where you brought her.  ❝ she’s been my partner since i was a teenager. we sort of grew up together, you know? ❞

"what?" jiang cheng is frozen. if bidden, his feet would be as lithe as stones. the hand holding huaisang's clenches tighter. the fingernails on his free hand press sharp into his palms.

"they can't do that. i mean--you ought to be courted properly."

he holds his tongue as he wants to snort. learning to love him, of all people, is like seeking the peaches of immortality. he takes a breath, relaxes his shoulders.

maybe this is his chance to live like his ancestors. this is his one shot to attempt the impossible. he paints on a half-smile. "and how do you plan to do that?" he keeps it coy, keeps himself from being too sharp, too brash.

teeth scrape flesh leaving him gasping. even the pain is delicious, faint and brief as it is. huaisang is a little tyrant in bed, and jiang cheng can’t help but to be a sycophant. 

     ❝ i want to. but i don’t. i couldn’t. i needed to talk to you first. i know you need me in lotus pier. i don’t want either of us to die young. i will always be your sibling. i want to stand at your side and help you. but i want to. ❞ you press a hand to his hair, you musses the strands. 

       ❝ but i need your okay. i need to know that you will be okay, if i go. but, i want to go with him after the war. i want to go now. but i’ll wait if you want me with you. it matters you know. maybe i’m stupid for wanting him, but he’s my zhiji. i already knew that but i’m not ready to leave you yet either you know. so even if i go, i’m still going to come running.  ❞

something in him is cut. he doesn’t know where, but he knows that it’s bleeding, can feel his heart swimming in its own blood, drowning in scarlet. it would be better if he could tell himself this was something foolish, an impulse. he had never seen wei wuxian do more than idle flirting--certainly not declaring their love like this. they’re letting him down so gently, too. it turns his face red.

“go with him. i’m letting you go.” wei wuxian needed his okay, let him have it. at least he can’t blame anyone but himself, telling wei wuxian to go himself. “he’s rich. he’ll take care of you. you won’t find anyone so fussy in yunmeng.”

     ❝ he said it himself. that’s why he wants me to go back with him. not because he wants to correct my ways. or stop me fom being me but because he’s in love with me. it sounds so fake. there’s no way. but. but. but. he wouldn’t have said it if he didn’t mean it. he can’t lie and even if he tried. lan zhan would be terrible at it. he has no practice. i just. ❞ you take a deep breathe.  ❝ i like him. i’ve always kind of liked him. but like i don’t know, i never even considered he would like me back. shijie knew about my crush, but like i don’t know. but i never even considered. i can’t. he wants me to go back with him. i think it’s because he wants to marry me. that might kill his ❞ uncle. 

“oh.” in spite of himself, in spite of the grief he was already nursing deep in the hollow of his chest, jiang cheng wanted to laugh. in this world, he only loved two people, and each of them had appalling taste in men. wei wuxian wanted to leave. he could see it in their face. they weren’t asking him anything. they were confessing. “the old man has seen worse. he’s met you.” his jaw is stiff, his skull a hollow void. “i hope he doesn’t bore you to death.”

of all places, wei wuxian would choose this one over him? he his mouth is clenched tight, his eyes on the ground. fine. let him run off to gusu and get married. jiang cheng doesn’t need anyone at his back. “so you’re--going?” he raises a brow, dares to look up.

his neck is tipped back, throat to the stars. nie huaisang could swallow his adam’s apple whole right now, and he would let him.

a hand snakes its way around his lover’s waist, pulling the two of them flush to one another. jiang cheng’s pants are tight, and he has no doubt that huaisang can feel him, throbbing against his thigh. good, he thinks. he wants them entwined, wants to let himself be more animal than man.