hi :)

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

&also it allows you to experience the joy of talking like an autistic vampire, which i highly recommend

if we are mutuals we will be reborn into the same cicada horde

[the most low energy you have ever seen me] we’re about to go crazy mode

T-shirt that says "I'M SORRY FOR THE PERSON I BECOME WHEN I'M OVERHEATED"

i once again want to say that hulu used to be entirely free with ads, and if you watched two minutes worth of commercials at the start of an episode the next 24 hours would be commercial-free. and now you pay $11.99 per month to watch things with commercials. what the fuck are we doing and how did we allow this to happen lol.

funniest thing to ever happen was when my boyfriend put on the first episode of columbo (which i'd never seen) but he wouldn't tell me what show it was he would only say "you'll get it when he shows up." but a fun fact about the first episode of columbo is that he doesn't show up for 32 minutes and when he does, he silently walks into the room with a cigar and does a little pose and goes "hi i'm columbo."