Everything And Nothing, Really.

unfollow me. i don’t know how you still even can with a brain. please unfollow.

i don’t care if you voted for him originally that was one wrong decision but

if you haven’t changed your opinion?

AROMANTIC PEOPLE

ASEXUAL PEOPLE

AND AROACE PEOPLE

ALL BELONG IN THE LGBTQ+ COMMUNITY

I’ve been thinking a lot about why some younger viewers seem to express such intense hatred for Aleksander, and even for those who love or support him. It’s something I notice more and more often — this aggressive, almost moralistic rejection of morally grey characters like Aleksander. And I don’t think it’s just about disliking him. There’s something deeper going on in how fandom spaces function today.

A large part of it, I believe, comes from the way stories are consumed online now. Platforms like TikTok or Twitter encourage fast takes, simplified narratives, and black-and-white ideas of who is “good” and who is “bad.” People aren’t always interested in nuance anymore. It’s easier to reduce someone like the Darkling to a red flag or a toxic man than to sit with the discomfort of a character who does morally questionable things, but also loves, suffers, and fights for a better life for the Grisha and all of Ravka. Grey areas are not trending. Moral certainty is.

I’ve also noticed a dominant narrative — the girlboss versus let’s say villain storyline. Those young people want Alina, Zoya, Genya to “free themselves” from him, and in doing so, they erase what was truly complex, painful, and layered between them. The romanticization of strength often forgets that real strength can come from understanding, not just rejection. And sadly, if you dare say you understand Aleksander or believe he had genuine feelings for Alina, you’re suddenly accused of romanticizing abuse. There is no space for symbolic storytelling or fictional dynamics that aren’t meant to mirror real-life healthy relationships.

Another issue is the casual misuse of psychological terminology. Words like “manipulator,” “gaslighter,” and “grooming” are thrown around without understanding their meaning. These young fans just follow the crowd and, like a frenzied inquisition, throw accusations. Aleksander is a character shaped by centuries of trauma, loneliness, and war. But instead of examining that, some people just diagnose him in fifteen seconds on TikTok and declare him irredeemable. It’s lazy, dishonest, and more importantly, it shuts down real conversation. I also think some people need to feel like they’re on the “right side.” If they hate the Darkling, they can prove they’re morally superior. In my opinion, that points to low self-esteem. It makes liking him feel like a flaw, or worse, a crime. In some fandom spaces, it turns into a ridiculous purity contest.

And if your interpretation doesn’t fit the mainstream narrative, suddenly you become a bad person. It’s such a toxic dynamic, especially when fiction is meant to give us a space to explore difficult things.

Honestly, I think many misunderstandings around Aleksander come from people who’ve never had to think deeply about war, power, or survival. People don’t relate to the Darkling just because he’s charming or a tragic figure. A A lot of us understand him because we know what it means to live in a world shaped by conflict — to watch systems collapse, to see the innocent suffer while leaders look the other way. And even if not, basic human empathy and emotional maturity, combined with historical knowledge, allow us to see more and, most of all, to avoid jumping to judgment. We don’t behave like an angry mob with pitchforks ready to burn someone at the stake. On a side note, I’ve been thinking about doing a post that points out how some parts of the fandom — especially certain Crows, Zoya, Nikolai, Genya, and Malina fans — act a lot like the Drüskelle.

Aleksander is not a villain. He is someone forged in blood and fire, who made impossible choices in a world that gave him none. People who have studied or lived close to the realities of war know that moral clarity is a luxury. He also fought for people who were hunted, tortured, erased. He refused to stand by while Grisha were murdered, burned at the stake, dissected like lab animals, or sold into slavery. And even though his methods became brutal, his cause was never about selfish gain. It was about protecting people like him in a world that never would.

Loving the Darkling is about recognizing the complexity of someone who stood between oppression and survival. It’s about understanding that some stories aren’t clean, and some leaders don’t have the luxury of kindness. Aleksander’s tragedy is that he knew he had to become a monster to stop the world from killing his people. And whether you agree with him or not, that kind of narrative deserves respect, not shallow rejection.

I’m going to hold myself accountable here—I was 14, and it doesn’t excuse me at all, but maturing is realising that just because something makes you uncomfortable it doesn’t mean you should attack or threaten people. I think people misinterpret safe spaces as places where you don’t discuss the uncomfortable stuff in your fandom—and now I know that that’s wrong.

it’s an uncomfortable process sure, to see someone like something you deem as horrible—and to this day, I don’t know what to think about the darkling’s relationship with Genya and how he treated her, and I still like Mal, despite everything.

maybe wanting to act older than my age and wanting to be morally right had a say in this—but at the same time, trying not to see or understand the other side contributes to an incredibly toxic dynamic—and it does absolutely contribute to harmful behaviour.

a fourteen year old shouldn’t have been on Twitter, for one—but then again fandom spaces are supposed to be a place for discussion and not disrespect and disrepair.

disguising attacks as “debate” and creating toxic dynamics leads to people not discussing themes and topics that need to generally be discussed — and very much do need to be understood. Uncomfortability is a way for you to start to realise there’s a deeper dive needed to be done and a more focused approach that you should take to understanding WHY this makes you uncomfortable.

If I didn’t stop interacting on Twitter and step back and see things from another point of view or even lend my ear to a discussion, I wouldn’t be here.

the first step is to listen. The second step is to POLITELY lend your perspective and ask for feedback and ENCOURAGE more polite discussion. Friendly discourse and dissection of text and interpretations TOGETHER is a good way for fandom spaces to slowly unwind toxic threads of hate.

what younger people tend to forget is — a different interpretation does not make you a “bad person” it makes you a complex person as all people are, seeing a different narrative in something that is meant to be interpreted in different, interesting ways. I think when younger people are afraid of something, very much like a lot of people are, they want to attack it because they’re not ready to sit down and try to understand.

I will admit I’m not the most knowledgeable or best person to discuss these things—I was once one of those people clamouring for “the moral high ground” when I was simply creating a ring of toxicity around me. I’ll still admit I understand the perspective of Mal being a pain in the ass—but I get it, I get the perspective of the Darkling not being a villain, even if I don’t particularly like him—because I let myself sit down and listen instead of offering another shallow take or an attack.

I don’t know what about him still makes me so uncomfortable, and even after leaving Twitter and trying to find a perspective to help me see why, I could only come up with the fact that yes, he is a layered character with suppressed mental issues and he was vying for the Grisha’s liberation, but I still dislike him, and even after trying to find out why, I can’t come to a conclusive answer.

and that’s okay. Should I attack someone for liking him? No. Does liking him mean that they’re immediately supporting the death of innocent people? No. But does me disliking him mean that I endorse a monarchy? No. I like that he was trying to dismantle a system and very cleverly—and even I can’t find a way that doesn’t lead to his path, and I admire him for that—but I don’t like him, but taking the time to slowly dissect and learn from what his storyline was trying to tell me made me understand the reason why many see him as a hero, and I would have too, if I found a way to get over my hate for him that I still can’t explain.

Should I attack someone for disliking Mal? No. Does liking Mal mean I think I’m immediately in the “morally right side?” It’s a complex situation and Mal has his flaws that also need to be addressed directly. And that’s an uncomfortable discussion that STILL needs to be had. Mal did some things. I can’t fully understand the hate, but someone with a great dissection probably does. I liked Mal for being someone who dealt with abandonment VERY poorly (and I liked that he represented his distrustful nature and incredibly humane jealousy and self worth being tied to what he wants to have, but I will never endorse his weird possessiveness over Alina, and I like him because he’s a piece of wet paper and weird and that’s fine.) and someone else hates Mal because he dealt with abandonment unhealthily. Neither does it mean that I’m on a morally incorrect side.

Reality does not need to intersect with fiction—and I don’t need to make fandom spaces a place where I pretend that liking something I don’t agree with immediately means that that person is the same type of person that character is — some people, as OP said, like what the character represents on a broader narrative. Like what OP said, it becomes this odd “purity fight” thing—and when we start blocking off spaces for discussion, we block off spaces for people to understand themselves through media.