Twice-baked barf bag

My name is Aubrey. It's short for Aubrey, but you can call me Aubrey. My mom had a uterus and i lived in it, then I was born in 200 log cabins at the tender age of 6. I was born without a face. I'm a female who is old enough to feel ways about stuff and I currently live in the vicinity of an area adjacent to a location which has a luxurious view of the void, more specifically between Chun Li's gorgeous thighs. I hold a black belt in gift wrapping and am a born mood-killer. My 2 favorite things are commitment and changing myself. You will often find me yelling into a lion's mane with my shirt off, wedgie-ing boys in half, resting my boobs on things, posting cats on the internet or jerk-bending. Currently i am enrolled in finger-painting college. My hobbies include consensual bird-watching, yelling swear words into sewer pipes, fornicating on stolen antique furniture, joyriding down the feminine hygiene aisle, eating myself through to the other side, farting in bathtubs and laughing my ass off, knocking cats over and using them as air guitars. My current occupations include professional snow leopard and ring-tailed lemur, marathon lounger, pirate, booger-blaster, dumpster jedi, postmortem caricature artist and coffin-stuffer.