the way Kaeya caves in when everything comes at him all at once, and Diluc is a witness to how his little brother crumples under the weight.
Kaeya got sick, and that's morbid enough in itself, and Diluc is scared shitless, his mind racing every possible thougt. and Kaeya sits on the bed, his fever raging inside for over four days, he hadn't gotten even a wink of sleep, fatigued and overworked to the bone.
Diluc watched Kaeya burn himself out for the sake of protecting and guarding from what's to come. half a year of planning, strategies, battles no one was a witness to, all along his usual work as a Cavalry Captain with no Cavalry and Quartermaster with quarters half-empty. Diluc watched it and did nothing to stop his brother from it.
he did his bit — helped with some of the battles, logistics, intel; Fatui now are bonded both legally and illegally, any threat to the border of Mondstadt would cause a war Snezhnaya can't afford to go into. Kaeya worked relentlessly.
Kaeya drew a signature, shook hands, walked out of the courtroom, and promptly collapsed, his body halting him effectively in tracks.
however, Diluc also learned that beside this huge work Kaeya is in charge of many more, and he couldn't afford to take a break; more than that, the Abyss was lurking, searching for something, and Kaeya knew what they needed.
but he is sick and can't even stand up to welcome anyone, entering his home. he feels himself useless, utterly inefficient, not worthy of any care and kindness he receives bedridden. he tries to shoo Diluc away, bitter and angry, but Diluc stays.
Diluc stays and his heart skips a beat, horrified, when he notices eyes, filling with tears — one golden and scarred and one blue and clouded from the fever.
Kaeya never cried, even in immeasurable pain.
'what's wrong?' Diluc stammers, rushing to Kaeya's side, and Kaeya suddenly starts sobbing, clutching his hands on his hair, tangled and greasy, wet from sweat, and he cries, and cries, and cries, and mumbles slurred 'I'm sorry, so, so sorry', and all what Diluc can do is to hold him and cradle, not letting him fall into the smithereens.
with the next beat of his heart, Diluc realises why.
and clutches Kaeya tighter.
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