Your hearts are in the wrong place.

bonus:

a giant castle rises from the ground around the main government building. this is basically peta’s fault.

you ride a dragon-god into space to fight a meteor alien. this is plan b. plan a was to send the meteor alien to another dimension.

one guy tries to get rid of the oceans. one tries to get rid of dry land. What Happens Next Will Shock You.

a dude jumps straight out of the water onto an evil pirate ship, lowers the gangplank, then swims off to let a teenager deal with it.

there is a 1/3 chance that a runaway 11-year-old yakuza/mafia prince broke into a laboratory to steal an adorable plant creature.

you can buy a useless fish for several thousand yen from a shady salesman. this is actually a very good investment.

the devil, the god of death and the bringer of eternal nightmares all really really really like cake.

the space cultists would have won if dragon lucifer hadn’t showed up.

god is a goat, and if you take it to the right place, it will make you a baby god.

the most powerful trainer in the world (a 14-year-old with a pet rat) went up a frozen mountain for no apparent reason. he only comes down after you beat up his rat. this is absurdly difficult.

the effective ruler of the unova region is a magical catgirl space princess with a bunch of pet dragons. 

•The actual child of the stars is a little shit

•Lady disowned her kids for a jellyfish

•The boss of the region’s local crime organization has a pet isopod

•Actuals aliens come to earth to protect it from other aliens

•Girl was raised to become the master of a dragon, dragon chooses random 12 year old

•Super model tells a 14 year old girl’s dad to fuck off

•An entire underground system full of valuable fossils and gems is completely open to the public as long as they have basic digging tools

*BEAT DROPS*

automobile

changing coolant

changing oil

changing tire

jumping a car

plumbing

toilet running

basement flooding

replace a faucet

clogged drain

electrical

replacing light switches

blew a fuse

installing overhead light

earth vs. neutral vs. live wires

home

patching drywall

finding studs

Big Brain: Fallout 76 is an online Fallout similar to Elder Scrolls Online