Hello! I’m a coyote, an American goshawk, and an osprey. That said, I occasionally use photos of Eurasian goshawks and certain coydogs to represent myself due to our similarities. No photo completely captures me as I’m a unique individual, so I usually settle for “close enough”.
This blog is an online space for me to share my experiences with therianthropy and to discuss it with others. I’ve been aware of my true nature for as long as I can remember, although I joined the therian community back in 2019.
⤷ I am eighteen! I’m fine if minors follow me, as this account is sfw (with the possible exception of non-graphic animal death). Asks are fine, but no dms please! I don’t have a dni list, but I will report those who I feel are at risk of harming themselves or others (e.g. a pro-contact zoophile) and block freely.
⤷ I am equally a coyote, a goshawk, and an osprey on most levels and as such I prefer the use of canid and/or avian vivterms. I recognize that I am a human biologically, but it’s not how I should be, and it makes me uncomfortable to be referred to as such.
⤷ I don’t really resonate with the concept of names/gendered pronouns, but referring to me by the common name of my species is best (e.g. “the goshawk”, “the coyote”).
If calling me by a more traditional name is more appropriate/easier for you, you may call me Sturcan. She/her pronouns are also alright! I won’t be upset if you make a mistake; these are just my preferences!
Hobbies: I like spending time outdoors. Bowhunting, fishing, foraging, identifying species, bushcraft, camping, vulture culture, climbing, scavenging/dumpster diving, and hang-gliding are a few activities I enjoy.
I also enjoy sketching, reading, running, skateboarding, slinging, playing ttrpgs, and all things zoology.
⤷ I practice vocals as well as animal movements (including, but not limited to, quadrobics) for both fun and species euphoria.
My username is a combination of the genus names of my species. That’s also where “Sturcan” comes from!
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Dog toys are the best, especially to chew on, to “hunt”, and to take outside (if they’re squeaky, even better, so long as you’re not worried about secrecy)!
I have other stuffed animals that I care about and don’t want to get damaged, so it’s nice to have something whose purpose is to be ruined that I won’t feel as guilty about.
My partner affirms my species in small statements. Examples:
Instead of saying "shaking your hand" when he agrees with me while on a call (a habit of his in general conversation) he tells me "shaking your paw"
He sends pictures of dogs he spots sometimes. Tells me he saw me on a walk again.
Never refers to me as human. Keeps me in mind all the time. When I came out to him it was on accident. He looked it up, what it meant. Said it was no big deal and then adjusted the way he refers to me.
These are some songs that help me feel more like myself. There’s a lot of ambience here, as I find human vocals to be somewhat distracting.
Picture fur or feathers being ruffled by the wind, steady wingbeats above a vast lake, running though a prairie with the grass stroking your fur, a cloudy sky as you look above…
This is personal and made with my theriotypes in mind, but I’m sharing this in case others find it helpful.
To be completely honest, I have a mild dislike for all of the nonhuman/alterhuman labels there are. I mean, plutoid and holothere might as well not exist. I use them both for simplicity's sake, but I can literally just say "I am a bearded vulture" and leave it at that. No labels necessary. They almost feel human, too human, for me, and in a way invalidating. It also feels like a sort of arms race, but for words, like, "who is the most animal/nonhuman" or "who is the most valid" or "who can claim the most distance from humanity". I'm not saying nobody should be able to use those labels, as like I've said I also use them (although mainly out of a need for self expression), but they just seem... counterintuitive to a degree.
I also just stick with the name of my species or occasionally [insert species] therian. I don’t want to use most labels, even if they technically apply to me.
That said, I don’t mind labels, as they can help others express themselves and connect with others, but when it becomes a constant battle for validation, that defeats the purpose.
I do really like terms though, such as vivterms, otherbond, etc.
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I see posts all the time on r/therian that go something like:
“Why haven’t I seen a bug therian?”
…and the comments section is flooded with dozens of accounts talking about their bug theriotypes they’ve had for half their life.
It’s strange how there’s this lack of object permanence that occurs with theriotypes / kintypes when it’s not being blasted online. Just because a bug therians isn’t active 100% of the time in the community / in online spaces doesn’t mean they are suddenly “rare” or “uncommon”.
And the implications of this are quite unsettling, as it’s suggesting that in order to be seen / validated you need to willingly put yourself out on display, and showcase your theriotype in a manner that everyone can notice.
Otherwise the only attention your theriotype gets is others treating you like a presumed extinct species. And if said theriotype is found, it’s treated like a “rare species” and placed on an online pedestal, appreciated only because it’s assumed to be the few of its kind.
This this this! It’s also harmful to those with more “common” theriotypes, as they’re often disregarded just because they’ve been seen before and aren’t “special”. Publicity is considered essential until you’re “too visible”.
Theriotypes shouldn’t be valued by their presumed rarity. All theriotypes are amazing and I’m grateful for all of them in the community, visible or not.
I wish there were more subtle ways to recognize other therians in public. People always talk about wearing gear or drawing the theta delta on your hand, but those are usually just dead giveaways that strict parents would never allow for. Coming from someone who cannot outwardly express their nonhumanity physically due to strict family, we need to come up with a more secretive way.
My go-to question is “do Greek letters and a triangle, circle, and weird dash mean anything to you?”. It’s a bit vague and can’t be displayed, but at least a few therians would have the theta delta come to mind.
I’ve also added a disassembled theta delta to my hands before which is a bit more subtle.
That said, I’ve managed to clock A LOT of therians out and about without relying on their gear. Straydar is very much a thing and all’s not lost if you cannot hint at your therianthropy.
It's always been interesting to me how much focus there is in the alterhuman community on why we are the way we are, in comparison to my experiences in the trans community of the why being a largely unimportant and uninteresting question that mostly gets brought up by transphobes instead of trans people. Meanwhile in years of lurking and occasionally speaking up in the therian community, it feels like there's always some back and forth going on between spiritual vs psychological vs whatever other causes.
Maybe the outsized focus on it within the alterhuman community comes with alterhuman identities being much harder to externalize and so we end up ruminating on what "makes us" alterhuman as a way of validating internally what the external world cannot. I remember too that back in the grilling days that part of that ritual was often divulging your whole life history in search of the moment of "awakening" and the influences surrounding it. But I never really saw discovering myself as coyote as opening my eyes for the first time so much as putting on a new pair of glasses to reevaluate what was already there.
I suppose longing and dysphoria could be part of it, too. I can definitely understand wanting to retreat into memories of a past life or what have you if that's something that you experience.
I do identify with some mixed psychological, spiritual, and perhaps other factors, but it always feels like an odd chicken and egg situation for me. Does animality feel connected to my autistic and other neurodivergent experiences because it springs from those experiences, or does it feel connected because those are just my reality that all my other experience, including animality and transness and etc, filters through? Am I an animist and a polytheist because I'm an animal, or am I an animal who chose to be an animist and a polytheist because these, to me, honor my experiences more than more human-centric paths?
Part of why I identify my therianthropy so strongly with my autism is that my outward displays of emotion feel so kneecapped by phantom sensations telling me I'm emoting when I'm not. I'm nervous or anxious about something and my ears go back and I can feel fur prickling on the back of my neck, except they don't and it doesn't. I'm backed into a metaphorical corner by a situation at work and I want to bare my teeth and claim back some of my space, but what comes out is a pained grimace and I go hide in the bathroom for a while. I'm happy and relaxed and just enjoying my time with friends, but someone asks me if I'm feeling okay because I'm not smiling and laughing.
My sensory sensitivities feel very interwoven between neurodivergence and animality too. My love for the sensations of wind and flowing water and warm sunlight. How jittery I get around loud noises and loud human voices, to the point that I don't even like raising my own voice. How quickly my battery runs out at large crowded events, how overstimulated I quickly become about being touched.
Does this mean my autistic traits are actually just coyote traits, or that my animality and autism go hand in hand, or that the way my autism manifests is filtered through coyote? Who really knows or can ever know. I just work here!
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Definition: an inclusive alterhuman term used to describe a close group of alterhumans and nonhumans of multiple species. This relationship often exceeds the confines of human or typical friend groups.
Alternate forms:
Bondmate(s): member(s) of an otherbond
Otherbonded: verb
Otherbonds: plural form
Example: Our otherbond is made of a human, unicorn, cat, and a vampire.
Example: The dog and the dolphin always play together because they are otherbonded.
Similar words: pack, flock, herd, family, friends, group, relationship
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Circle: How those that are otherbonded protects and cares for each other
Center point: How an otherbond stays loyal to one another even when they go through life separately
Sun shape: the joy and comfort that comes from being cared for by bondmates
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This word can be used in regard to theriform entities and is not limited to only otherkin and therians. Its purpose is to be an inclusive term to describe a familial or friendly relationship between a group of entities regardless of identity.
The original intent of this term is, however, to describe a group of alterhumans of various species and types.
This can also be used to represent a group of one type of beings if each believes they enjoy the term. Especially if they are a species that is typically solitary but still have really close relationships with others. Or between a theriform entity and an alterhuman entity.
Yeah there's just a seal on the bus heading to go teach kids to swim. Yeah there's a snow leopard that just signed up for a rock climbing class. Yeah there's a Vampire walking to classes and resisting the urge to bite people in the crowds. Yeah there's a rabbit that's scared to order their own food at the restaurant but their too old to get help now.
But all anyone sees is a human seeming strange.
All they see is someone who never wants to leave the water. They see someone who sits at the top of cliffs for hours. They see someone who stares blankly from a distance, never getting close. They see someone thumping their feet under the restaurant table.
What is your dream job (or general career path if no specific job comes to mind)?
I've thought about this question from the time to time. Really, if I could, I'd just disappear into the forests to be freed from the grasp of mankind but such is not a smart move LOL
And on that note, there are certain things I wouldn't want to give up as I've grown up with them. There are some things in humanity I do like and if I have to be here, then I might as well make it enjoyable
I'll answer first: My dream job is voice acting!
During hard times, I always used animated films, animes and games to cope. To me, it kind of feels like roleplay except you only have your voice and the stories are already determined. A bit silly but sounds very fun. I love doing voice impressions and saying silly things that make people laugh. I kind of want to give others a laugh or a fun show to watch, just as some VAs did for me years ago
I’m on track to become a park ranger, which is my dream job and allows me to still connect to my nonhumanity. I also get to do citizen science on the side.
To preface: I'm not misanthropic. Humans aren't evil. My real life activism is largely around human rights issues, I love and care for humans as a whole.
But most humans don't view animals as having the same level of value as they do and it really, deeply upsets me as someone who is entirely nonhuman. I have to live with ths fact that there are people I know and love but if I didn't look bodily human, if I couldn't advocate for myself, they'd see my life as having less worth...just because I am not homo sapiens like they are.
I feel terrible, reaping the priveleges of a species I am not while my own is seen as disposable. Less than. Humans have always called other humans animals to justify immense harm to them...but for some reason if you have a problem with animals being seen as lesser in the first place, you must be a bad person. Because humans are, somehow, just inherently better.
I don't get it. I really don't. It hurts. I'm already so traumatised by the actions of humans, and then they tell me I must value their species as inherently more important than any other including my own or I am a bad person.
While most animals prioritize the well-being of their own species to survive (which makes sense and isn’t necessarily “wrong”), humans have definitely taken it to a much more extreme and harmful level that I cannot condone.
The fact that my kind are actively being exterminated in many places hurts me on a deep level, especially because if human society saw me as a coyote, I’d face the same fate. Systemically killing half a million humans is genocide, but systemically killing half a million of another species, even if it drives them to extinction? It’s “just business”. (Note: I know coyotes are not currently at risk for extinction; I’m referring more broadly to past events such as the extinction of the passenger pigeon. It is also not my intention to make light of genocide, as I find it unforgivable and horrible in every sense of the word). I can only imagine how painful it is for bug and rodent therians, as well as for those whose species are exploited for food.
Not fitting into human society is not an excuse to be discriminated against, and no species is superior. If someone cannot understand that, I will feel deeply uncomfortable and unsafe around them.
Haven’t had much drawing motivation lately, but I was able to muster up a quick doodle of how I’ve been viewing myself lately. I’m trying to strike a sweet spot between all of my forms.
Apologies for the bad lighting and low effort; I’m working with what I can right now.
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1. Do you ever have dreams about running on all fours??
2. Does it ever feel so right to run like that in your dreams that it genuinely breaks your heart waking up to your human body??
I've been having dreams like this for years. Since I was maybe 16 or so. And it always feels like I disconnect from a truer part of myself when I wake up from these dreams. Even if the details fade over time, I can never forget them. Especially since a lot of these dreams involve me being chased or pursued by some mysterious figure/group/entity. I've only had one dream like this that was peaceful. More recently, I had a dream where I was running on all fours, and I specifically remember having to dig my nails into the ground to get more traction. The phantom feeling of claws and dirt under my nails has been haunting my hands and the back of my mind on and off since.
So yeah, anyone else have dreams or experiences like this??
Note: I mention dreams about running because that's my experience but feel free to chime in about flying or swimming dreams or whatever you dream that might correlate to your theriotype
Yes to both! I get very vivid dream shifts of my types, sometimes stressful, sometimes not. Soaring over the water, darting through the trees, running through the grass…the sensation of feathers, fur, and freedom…it’s wonderful. I just wish I could wake up and have the same experiences.
