(・`_´・)┏

Another cat? 

Yes! It’s actually quite nice! I can wear cute clothes without dirtying them with my mucus! Additionally, the atmosphere here is very damaging to my lungs, so being human makes breathing much more pleasant. Always a good time, haha!

[Damn, he really has it all planned out. He has to hand it to him, the kid’s spent a lot of time thinking this through.]

It sure is fun! Except in my alien form, I am covered in mucus, and it gets on my dresses.

[Well. That’s weird. Kids are weird. This one especially. Where did he even come up with that?]

Oh geez, it’s a lot more complicated than that, my good sir! I’ve lived on Earth my entire life, presumably! I’m from the ocean, you see. But my species is from outer space! It’s quite confusing.

Anyway, are you a human? How’s that going for you?

[Was this kid serious...? He certainly looked sure of himself. Maybe it was just best to play along.]

[Shrugs.]

Pshaw! I can take care of myself! I’m an alien, you see. Usually! And I am, in fact, an adult in my species.

...Of course.

Nope! [Sure is!] I’m the Once-ler, too! Kinda spooky that we have the same name, right? But my friends call me Squid!

What’s your name?

!!! [SMACKS AWAY!]

...