hello again! gosh

One time i got sucked up by a ufo im not joking

what happebned

On god they were being super mean to me like they were flicking my head and shit the grey aliens were flicking my head and punching my nose and giving me noogies and shoving me and shit....

I think if I heard I Gotta Feeling by The Black Eyed Peas in the correct circumstances it could move me to tears. It's like the promise of a brighter future that never came to pass

I miss pjackks jellybean era

I miss da era where u passed out in bath tub cuz u sneezed to hard and fell your ass right on the holiday dinnerfish and it got scared and jumped in the toilet and swam down da drain

You promised not to tell anyone about that

“are u okay?” no i need more money

(as i scroll through tumblr looking at all the posts) hmm… beneath me, beneath me, juvenile… petty and childish… beneath me… this one is good. beneath me, juvenile, beneath me