# 𝑨𝑺𝑷𝑯𝑶𝑫𝑬𝑳𝑰𝑼𝑺 is a 𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐨 roleplay blog for 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐫𝐚 / written by jenny ( 25+ ; she/her ) ✿ permanently low activity due to life. originally established in october 2017 ✿ softly rebooted in october 2022. my sakura is mainly based off the manga and novels with some headcanons influenced by the anime and some of its fillers centered on her, but i mainly prioritize the manga and novels when it comes to sakura's characterization.
i typically do not follow first for ship-related reasons stated in my rules. please read my rules before following me so that i can make sure i'm not stepping on anyone's toes if you wish to interact. i want my blog to be a comfortable space for both me and my writing partners.
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He doesn’t take the cookie … She is sulking. How can he just reject perfectly good butter cookies? ❝ If you did, then I’m telling Ino. She knows your family, so who knows if she’ll let it slip to your parents … ❞ It’s a threat. ❝ Why were you named ‘Shikamaru’ anyway if you’re not even going to play along for deer jokes? Where's your sense of humor? ❞
rereading part one of the manga, and i want to make it a personal headcanon for me that s.akura would be very empathetic to those with self-esteem issues because she went through the same thing. she is a character full of love, so it makes me sad to see people still calling her a 'selfish bitch' 😔
( long meta underneath )
her whole childhood, she was bullied ruthlessly for having a big forehead, hence her meekness as a little kid. it wasn't until i.no came along that she began feeling just slightly more confident, but ultimately she has fallen into a vicious cycle of self-deprecating herself:
it's because of i.no's friendship that she began to like herself more, thus inspiring her wishing to stand as equals, not in i.no's shadow anymore. i'd like to add my own two cents that the crush on s.asuke is actually very relevant towards s.akura's personal character development in both a) using love as a goal to motivate herself in trying to make her 'unattractive' trait, her forehead, into something that would appeal to someone else, and b) using it as a way of kickstarting her true motive of breaking away from i.no's shadow. disclaimer that s.asusaku is indeed my most favorite saku ship; they are too important to me for many reasons, but out of respect towards those who do not like this ship, i shall keep ship ramblings to a minimum on my blog.
anyway i digressed a bit, but i would like to reiterate point a of using love as a goal to motivate herself / s.akura is still shameful of her forehead, fearing that s.asuke will not like that trait of hers:
she straight-up admits that she's self-conscious of it / one argument that saku haters tend to say is that she's so 'stupid' or such a 'selfish bitch always thinking about s.asuke and does nothing but cry' BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ... she cries because she has her own fears and doubts that scare her. she cries because she's human. they completely missed the memo that kishi created s.akura as a character who is supposed to act human because she is human. in his design notes for her, he literally says that he is fond of her character because of her humanity:
the core of s.akura's character, imo, is the theme of love: love for s.asuke that lasts for years, filled with dedication and patience despite all the hurt and obstacles she went through, but the love i'm mainly referring to is specifically self-love; self-appreciation. it's not just about her forehead. it's not just about the crush on s.asuke. it's about the inferiority complex she has with i.no, n.aruto, and s.asuke. it's about how she can't seem to love and appreciate herself. through all of part one, she's constantly comparing herself with everyone and seems to bring herself down often. she is aware of her own limitations and weaknesses. she knows. even k.akashi knew before she was even aware of it, as early as the chunin exams arc:
wanting to be mentally strong like i.no, n.aruto, and s.asuke ( + lee ) ...
but s.akura hiden reveals that she became the most popular and well-loved medic in the entire village. everyone adores her by the time of her novel, no matter if she has a big forehead or not. they love her because she is compassionate and kind. she is someone from a completely normal civilian family who had to earn everything. she didn't have any special jutsu or kekkei genkai like her teammates. you don't need all of that to be genuinely kind.
if i had to sum up the entirety of part one towards s.akura's personal character growth, it'd be the concept of self-love like what i had said before. her insecurities over her forehead + rivalry with i.no were settled during the chunin exams, and part two covers the other half of it, which is her self-esteem over her own skills——what she's capable of——greatly inspired by her love for s.asuke. this panel from the manga seems to be the point when she ultimately makes the decision to become a medic nin, a desire stemmed from her wanting to be of help to her loved ones and out of love for her teammates, not just s.asuke:
everything about s.akura has to do with love. i personally think the clinic she opens with i.no in the s.akura hiden novels is also a place where she has plenty of patients who have/had problems like her, which again, reiterates my point that she is beloved by the entire village at that point of the timeline because she's a very loving person full of love. no matter if you ship s.asusaku or not, it is very hard to deny that s.asuke is an extremely pivotal aspect of s.akura's character growth; a lot of her love stems from loving him. no matter how far he fell into his personal darkness, she still loves him. i do not mean in a romantic light, but love in general. her love for him is very intertwined into her own desire to grow stronger and improve herself, and bringing him back to konoha was the catalyst for that——because it stemmed from a promise with n.aruto, but she doesn't want to keep burdening n.aruto, so she's going to train herself to bring back s.asuke together out of love for team 7. again, it doesn't matter if you interpret it as romantic or not, team 7 is a very important thing in s.akura's life, so that's why she's trying so hard to piece them back together in part two.
she loves team 7, she loves her friends, she loves konoha, she loves all of her patients, and even though their relationship is strained, i think s.akura still loves her parents. that's why she is able to cry, because she loves so much.
she cries because she feels that she is always burdening n.aruto with everything due to her own inability to do what he can do. she is always frustrated with herself despite all of the training she's been doing because even though she's literally saved the life of g.aara's brother, she still views herself as a burden to others because she still cannot bring back the one person who completes team 7 and cannot seem to do more for n.aruto as it is:
and when it comes to s.asuke, that's where the strength of her love shines. she could've loved someone else the way she loves him, but she still picked him even though he has fallen so deep into darkness. i know this is steered towards romantic love within the context of this scene, but it does not erase the fact that she loves deeply:
kishi was right about her character having lots of humanity because the sheer willpower to patiently love someone so much for so long even though everyone else knows she could've picked someone else better is truly remarkable. she is someone who loves because she loves them. i'm not saying that's mentally healthy for her 💀, but it does show how tenacious she can be when it comes to love and doing things out of love for love.
she is a character created to love herself and to love others, and that is truly very human of her. to still call s.akura a 'useless and selfish bitch' even after reading the entire manga kinda shows how people didn't focus on her close enough is2g ( also, everyone is kinda selfish when it comes to love, so i think it's unfair to solely accuse s.akura of it, but w/e i guess. she's just 'useless' and 'whiny' like that )
"Sakura. I have an offer for you. A free offer, one that Naruto has refused. Would you be interested in seeing my chiselled chest that I've worked hard on achieving?"
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there’s a broad smile on her lips as she joins hinata with a mug of her own, hot chocolate heated up to perfection. winter has always been such a lonely season to sakura, but strangely, it’s snowing during summer. how odd, she thinks, but hey, her life’s been pretty odd so far, so whatever, right? miraculously, she has no shifts for the next few days, and so, this totally calls for a girls’ day! girls’ day with hinata! not even random snow can stop it!
❝ mhm! ❞ she takes a much-needed sip, munching on a marshmallow. she added too much onto hers. ❝ what i’ve been up to? ❞ sakura pauses for a moment, humming in thought. obviously it won’t do to go with the usual hospital work answer / she is certain that everyone knows her workload by now. instead, she grins a little, going for a more casual reply: ❝ well, y’know how temari-san’s been visiting even more than usual these days? shikamaru is always the one walking with her and he was blushing. blushing——so you know what, i’m calling it now: they are so dating. i’ve been betting with ino. i say they’re already together, but secretly. wanna join in too, hinata-chan? all bets are welcomed! ❞
as a romantic at heart, sakura’s never bored of love gossip and still endeavors to partake in the fun somehow, someway.
but still, this is their girls’ day, and so sakura laughs and takes a longer sip of hot chocolate before saying, ❝ but anyway. aside from that, i’ve been good. thoroughly amused by ino-pig’s in-depth shikamaru analysis, but i’m doing good. happy and good. what about you? are you and your sister doing fine? i saw you two talking together the other day. i thought about saying hi, but it looked like you were having family time. ❞ ( she purposely neglects to mention neji’s name. )
"There are 361 of them." Neji had long been used to the tenketsu and their locations, all varying slightly on each person. He had seen the way that the tendrils of the chakra network wrapped their way around the body, through the organs, around the bones.
He had been able to strike the needle point sized tenketsu perfectly as a young child, since before he graduated the academy. Even in a chaotic fight where there appeared to be desperate kicks and jabs, he was able to hit them just right, without so much as a worry of missing.
"Keeping track of them is easier when you can see them. I have been training with them since I was three years old, as well. There's too many to memorize and they move depending on that person's particular chakra network."
The Byakugan flickers to life as he looks at her. He gently presses two finger tips to a spot on her lower forearm, right by the crook of her elbow.
"For example, you have one right here. Naruto's tenketsu is lower." He moves his finger tips about an inch lower on her arm.
"If I were to strike you there, it wouldn't hit a chakra point. But I could destroy the muscle by severing it's connecting tissue."
She instinctively follows the movement of his fingers; can feel it when he softly presses two of them against a pressure point on her arm. If she remembers correctly, striking that would immobilize her arm completely as it is near the elbow joint in tandem with the muscle located there. A fearsome combo if disabling an enemy.
❝ I see. Sometimes I forget that everyone has a different chakra network even though we all share similar tenketsu points. Tsunade-shishō said that if enough damage is done towards your tenketsu, not even medical ninjutsu can cure it … It makes me feel like we sometimes take it for granted that we’re shinobi. ❞
But she is sure that Neji knows this. He understands more than most people how it would feel to be raised having such powers at his disposal. She remembers his battle with Hinata back then, during the Chūnin Exams.
❝ Destroying the muscle, though. ❞ She smiles a little wryly. His fingers are at a location where he had once struck Hinata. Sakura remembers that vividly, makes her wonder how times have changed. She is glad that Neji has changed. ❝ I didn’t know Gentle Fist could extend to damaging the muscles as well. Then again, that’s completely plausible since it can do massive damage to your internal organs, right? Lee-san and Kakashi-sensei explained it a little to me back then, but I don’t think they mentioned that. ❞
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“Not so much stubborn as I think he needs the proper outlet to thrive.” Jiraiya replied with a wistful sigh. He was horrible to train when he was younger too. There’s so much to learn. So much to do. Sitting around felt like a waste.
Ramen shouldn’t be too hard to provide, hopefully. Even the smallest of tiny villages usually at least have a convenience store or something with instant noodles. If all the kid needed was noodles and zoomies to keep the demon inside of him quiet then it was a pretty good deal.
“I’ve successfully trained a handful of students. I don’t doubt I can handle him. Although I think it would be fun to train you. It’s rare to get a student that is eager but still listens.” He offers a grin. “I’m not just saying that because we’re on the subject. You’re a smart kid. You’re going to go places, whichever path you end up taking.”
Alas it’d be a shame to sit on good food. Even if he wasn’t too fond of desserts. It was nice to finally kinda see what it would be like to have a daughter. A tea party paired with advice and a small bit of gossip was rather refreshing. He sees the appeal. He finished up his order with a few more bites and nursed his drink to wash it down. It was getting a bit late but nothing too bad. Enough time in the day to do something else before getting dinner and rooms for the night.
“You sure there’s nothing else you want to do? We shouldn’t waste good daylight.”
❝ Huh? Me?! ❞ She is taken aback by his words, pausing to gesture at herself confusedly. He wants to train her? Well, he’s a Sannin and all, but she isn’t sure if she can even endure his training with how she is right now. After all, they literally just discussed her strengths, and it’s obviously not physical strength if she understood correctly——but when he starts mentioning her willingness to listen, she dismissively waves a hand, humble. ❝ Oh, that’s nothing. Unlike some people, I do try to listen to my teachers. They’re my teachers, after all. ❞ It’s just common decency, honestly.
❝ Thanks, ❞ she says more genuinely, in response to his compliment. Sakura didn’t expect to have this kind of conversation with him, but it wasn’t all that bad. He’s actually quite decent when he’s not ogling over a pair of melons. She simpers. ❝ And I guess you’re not as sleazy as Naruto sometimes complains you are. When you two come back to Konoha after your training, I’ll show you my progress! ❞
The waitress finally comes back with their missing sandwich cookies and strawberry cream cake rolls, apologizing for the wait. Sakura is quick to reassure her again before the waitress bows politely and wanders off. When Jiraiya mentions daylight, Sakura realizes the time and starts eating her cake rolls quickly while contemplating.
After swallowing, she says, ❝ Hm, I was gonna visit Ino-pig just to chat, but I think she’s working today at the flower shop. I was also going to buy some ice cream for home before the store closes. It’s summer, so my dad’s been urging me to pick up some. Said some lame joke like, ‘I scream for ice cream,’ or something like that until my mom yelled at him to stop. ❞ She rolls her eyes. Her dad is so embarrassing sometimes. Seriously. ❝ You can come along if you want, I guess. You treated me to something, so I’ll pay you back. I’ll buy you one thing of your choice. I don’t wanna feel indebted. ❞
( It’s also a thank you for the advice, not that he knows. )
he has always been the fatherly type, a sixth sense for lost causes; kakashi told him once. who else impulse adopts a child unloved by it's village, ridiculed and scorned -- when the third great war still clung to his bones, weighing heavy on mind and physique; the death of his own father choking him for words. despite, or perhaps BECAUSE OF, this he threw himself at lee with reckless abandon. a devotion the, now splendid jônin, and prized jinchūriki, returned tenfold -- in turn love returned by the father tenfold. AD INFINITUM. a love given freely, of course, not only to lee. his dear tenten -- his dear neji. and sakura, too, if she asked for it, gai knows how kakashi can be, not because he doesn't care, but because his love shows only in subtle ways.
❝ did you just call me old?! ❞ he barks with playful indignation. doesn't comment on the rest, though, ten thousand. . . she jests, unaware that this is closer to the actual number than she'd probably like it to be. the maito just chuckled as sweat continues to run down his forehead in streaks. continue to talk to him, he likes a little chat through arduous efforts.
❝ we have -- fun little competitions, more than usual lately. ❞ neji's death still weighs heavy on lee's mind, gai's heart is broken, too; and kakashi had been largely unavailable due to his duties as the rokkudaime. being bereft of their dear rivals, one much more than the other, whose to say father and son can't enjoy a casual rivalship to hone their skills? ( gai dreams of the day he can, once again, have an all out sparring match with his darling son )
❝ INVITE US -- then, i'd love to come, i know lee would do. give these kids a taijutsu show that puts nin - and genjutsu to shame. ❞ as if he hasn't already done that, when he killed the ghost of the uchiha, the host of the great and terrible ten tails, the newborn god of chakra with his bare hands.
the polite smile is now a cheeky simper. ❝ well, you certainly are older than me! i have access to your hospital records to confirm your age, y’know. ❞ she likes this, this amicable chatting with gai-sensei: kakashi-sensei is practically a ghost now with how he’s practically living in that hokage tower, and she gets tired of her own father’s terrible puns. being a father seems to come easy for gai; maybe it would be like this if her own father was a shinobi who actually had a hobby. in truth, a part of sakura thought that gai-sensei would’ve been a little annoyed by her sudden presence, but despite his intense sweating and arduous stance, he still warmly accepts her. truly the sign of a great parent. lee-san is lucky to have such a loving support system.
❝ in that case, please continue having more fun competitions, ❞ she enthuses, merry, although there is some hidden concern for tenten. with gai and lee spending all of this time together, she wonders if tenten ever feels left out … but in retrospect, losing neji is a loss that made everyone sad, not just his team. sakura is half-certain that these competitions help gai and lee cope a little better, like how tenten most likely has her own way of coping. she’s glad that they’re slowly healing, moving onward.
❝ since it’d also be okay with lee-san, that would be great! ❞ her smile sobers up a little, losing some of the lightheartedness. ❝ some of the kids in the clinic and the hospital can’t afford to go outside even if they wanted to. some have disabilities or other reasons, and i feel bad that i can’t do anything more for them … since they enjoy your competitions, i’m sure it’d brighten their day a lot to see you and lee-san in person. ❞ and, well, sakura is also a little biased——given how her own training went, she is more than happy to advocate for taijutsu performances. it’s in poor taste to not appreciate taijutsu.
she perks at an idea. ❝ oh, and maybe you could even tell them about your experiences during the war? or just fun stories with lee-san? kids always like a good story time. i know you have plenty of interesting stories to share! ❞ he is literally one of the war heroes, after all! she was there! ( maybe the kids will find his stories more exciting than her one of punching kaguya’s head during the war. some of them do not believe her. she is still sulking about that. )
IT'S NOT OVER; his arm quivers, his muscles aching, begging him to stop -- but he won't. it's not over no matter what the medics, and tsunade-sama, bless her, said. madara uchiha, the newborn god of chakra, the gate of death -- HE IS STILL MAITO GAI. and his springtime of youth was only over when he said it was.
and he was about to argue with the young kunoichi, just like he had with any other medical professional who tried to tell the jônin what's best for him -- but she changes his tone, and the furrow in thick eyebrows disappears nigh immediately. ❝ i am safe -- and healthy. ❞ despite the grunt of effort, and the sweat dripping down his skin.
how could he not be, if he as much as stubs his toe, lee; blessedly, his adorable son, was there with tailed beast chakra. the very reason the hosptial hasn't seen him much since his release, despite the eighth gate still lingering in muscle and bone, he has yet to pay the full price for the power to kill a god. ❝ sharp as a knife, aren't you, my adorable lee has broken my handstand record, so in turn, i will get it back. ❞ he might no longer be the world's greatest taijutsu master, the title now belonging to lee, as it should be, but he was still konoha's noble green beast. ❝ you young folks have another thing coming if you think i will be defeated so easily!! ❞
despite being in different teams, she knows gai-sensei bleeds sincerity as much as his own son, as they were, indeed, like two peas in a pod. sakura wonders about it sometimes, how parent and child can get along so well; her family is normal, average, very uninteresting, but the relation between mother and daughter is quite abysmal and shows little signs of improvement even now. it makes her slightly envious of gai and lee, only sometimes. ( every family is different, after all. )
❝ i’m glad. ❞ she gives a small laugh, easing up already, and she shakes her head with fond exasperation. different teams, of course, but everyone within konoha is sort of like family to a degree. gai-sensei has accomplished many feats: a handstand competition wouldn’t do much harm to him in the grand scheme of things. ❝ sorry. i just worry a lot. i guess it comes with being a medic. this ‘young folk’ is just trying to do the right thing by looking out for her elders! ❞
sakura beams, his enthusiasm infectious. ❝ record? how many handstands was that? 10,000? ❞ a joke. a complete joke, she swears. please take your breaks, she is wailing inside, but on the outside, she rolls her eyes. ❝ didn’t you just have another competition where you run around konoha on your hands? is that why lee-san’s not here? i feel like i always see you two whenever i look out my window, and even the kids i tend to. they like watching you guys, y’know. sometimes, they ask me if i can invite you two in to give them a private show or something. ❞
She hums, intrigued as she stares at the chart in front of her detailing various chakra points. Sakura, in her endeavor to understand the average human body, actually does not fully know her 361 chakra points too well, as her medical studies focuses more on the actual body and muscles and, well, other scientific anatomical things. Learning about chakra points is somewhat relevant, but mostly distant in the field of healing, and thus, it’s not her forte. Besides, there ought to be no one better than an actual Hyūga clan member to pursue tenketsu knowledge from, namely Neji, who is luckily someone she knows and can go to in times like these. Sure, he’s older than her, but nevertheless, he has been accepted into her circle of friends through the years. She didn't want to bother or bore Hinata about this, and Neji seems like he wouldn't mind the academic questions. Too much, at least.
❝ Can you run that by me again, Neji-san? How do you manage to keep track of them all? There’s 361 of them, right?! ❞
❝ gai-sensei, be careful! i don’t want to see you in the hospital! ❞ she then pauses, realizing that the wording might become misinterpreted, so she quickly amends, ❝ not that i don’t wanna see you, but i prefer it if people are safe and healthy, y’know? less to worry about. ❞
now that the war is over, it’s obvious that things are never really the same anymore in this village, but it’s much more apparent in team gai, especially with that gaping hole of their lost member. although sakura is primarily in the hospital, even she has noticed the change in gai’s team, how gai and lee are spending more time together while tenten is trying to manage by herself. gai and lee tend to partake in some crazy activities together around the village that is mildly impressive to watch from her window, which urges her to ask, conversationally, ❝ so, what are you doing with lee-san this time? a handstand competition? you seem so focused. ❞
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there’s some irony in the way she is once again peeling apples for him, preparing them into a snack to share, but instead of slices, sakura prepares apple rabbits this time. she has gotten good at it, not that she wants to brag. apples are the only things she has right now——for practice, she had stubbornly proclaimed——and seeing sasuke makes her think of a plate of apples being knocked to the floor once upon a time, years ago; it is a distant memory now. they are currently doing better with the war over.
❝ hope they’re not too childish for you, ❞ she gently jokes, setting the third apple rabbit on the plate before cutting the fourth one. ❝ i’ve been making them for the kids in the children’s ward from time to time. they’re apparently a big hit, so i thought i’d share my success a little with sasuke-kun. be honored! what do you think? do i have the makings of a professional apple cutter? ❞ there’s amusement in her eyes because she thinks it’s nice that they can finally get to talk in such casual, normal settings.
