So I keep going AWOL
((Hi everyone! This blog has brief moments of activity before going silent again, and while I do believe that no one ever owes an explanation for blogs going quiet, I want to give one.
This is going to be multi-faceted.
The first reason is my health. I’ve mentioned this before, but I suffer from many chronic illnesses, and the only one untreatable is my ME (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis), also known as CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome). I prefer to use ‘ME’ because I feel CFS is a bit of a misnomer. While fatigue is a huge part of the illness, it is not the only symptom, and often isn’t the worst symptom (it’s still pretty bad though).
The fatigue isn’t just a regular tiredness. It’s an exhaustion and weariness down to your bones. It means your brain can’t function how it used to. There’s varying levels of severity, and I’m moderate. This means I use mobility aids, I use a shower chair, I have to carefully choose how I use my limited amount of energy each day.
I’m not going to go into all the nitty gritty (though I do talk about it on my personal blog @komaeda-nagayto and am always happy to answer questions there) but it’s a roller coaster of an illness. Sometimes people will just feel better for years at a time before getting worse.
I’ve been steadily worsening since my diagnosis in mid-2017.
Another reason is I don’t feel I have a place in the community. There are some people in the community I am uncomfortable being around (and no I won’t say who or why because I don’t want to cause drama, I just want to lay this out here), and so I’m not sure where my place is.
I started this blog for @ask-lucky-boy and ever since lucky-boy’s mod went on permanent hiatus, I’ve been unsure what to do. That’s not to say there’s any bad feelings there, lucky-boy’s mod did what was best for their health and I would never ever hold that against a person, and in fact they’re still a good friend I talk to regularly.
All I knew was that I wanted to, at one point, do a mastermind!Hajime event, and I’ve done that, and had a lot of fun.
I don’t have any direction for this blog, and my limited energy is being spent elsewhere. I play in two D&D campaigns and run one myself. I stream on Twitch and post videos on Youtube. I have professional responsibilities.
Basically, this blog has become a low priority for me.
This is all a lot longer than I meant it to be.
I’m still around. This blog will stay because 1. I’m a nostalgic bitch who likes to go back to the things I’ve done in various fandoms and 2. I might come back, even if it’s just briefly.
I have really enjoyed having this blog and being part of the community, and the friends I have made. The absolute chaos with some stuff has been priceless. Demon!Hajime will always be a fond memory.
TTFN))












