Ask The Old Writer

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to MLP Fan Fiction

Return to Tales to Read AFTER the Lights are OUT!

NO REFUND

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

985 words

© 2019 by Glen Ten-Eyck

Writing begun 10/15/19

All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions.

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

///////////////////////

The cloud white mare with black mane and tail regarded the party with suspicion.  She pointed an accusing hoof at the party’s leader, a gaunt looking yellow pony with scraggly off red mane and tail.

“Why would you be wanting to dig up this grave?  This pony is at rest. You sure that you aren’t ghouls using a pretext so that you can grab a snack?”

That pony just snarled, “Ain’t none of your business, Whitey!  And NO! We ain’t ghouls!”

She stepped into his way and sat solidly on the grave that the yellow pony was trying to get his shovel into.  “It is my business! Anypony trying to disturb my home is my business!  Why do you want to dig up Rory Saddler?  What is the point, if not to eat his corpse?”

Hello, my Kittens. Now that my car is fixed, thanks to @mordenheim, @zira (Twice!) and @inhumaninterest, I know have another problem.

My computer's motherboard, CPU and Ram are old and slowing down, and need to be replaced. Eventually.

The least expensive combo I can come up with is $700 for all three parts.

So, as always, my commissions are open, and I need help, any help.

Prices are still the same.

Thanks in advanced.

Here are some examples of commissions;

Price: $100

Price: $100

and

- the menu at a restaurant is not an ingredient list you can use to create new dishes we could hypothetically make for you instead of the choices on the menu

- we do not have omelets on the menu because we do not make or serve omelets

- yes, i know we have eggs on the menu, but we still do not have omelets.

- yes, i realize omelets are eggs, but not all eggs are omelets, and the eggs we serve are not omelets.

- you cannot out-logic me so that i cave in and ring in an omelet for you. i am better at arguing than you are.

- there are no omelets here. there have not been, and will not be, omelets here. if you want an omelet you will need to go somewhere else.

- i can also promise that you do not want an omelet cooked by line cooks who have not been trained how to make omelets. because we don't sell omelets.

- no, i am not going to single-handedly put service on pause for the next twenty minutes while three cooks google how to make an omelet and then proceed to fuck up multiple omelets that our kitchen is not set up to prepare, so you can have an omelet.

-and we both know you'd bitch if it takes longer than six minutes to come out anyway.

- no, you may not just go back into the kitchen and make yourself an omelet. the line cooks do not take kindly to trespassing. also, what the hell.

- i hear that you want an omelet. that does not change the fact that we do not offer omelets. if you want to eat an omelet, you will need to go to another restaurant that does have omelets on the menu. this is not negotiable.

- i am the manager.

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to Tales of Sir Neva Mar

cover art by Aranel the Cyborg, now @wind-the-mama-cat​

<==Previous

“Still, in the morning, shortly before the first light, the villagers will come to despoil your corpse. If you are still hale, they will slay you and put the blame on me. It has happened a few times before this.”

Offering Raven Shade his wrist, King Neva Mar said, “Take some nourishment, then. Not too much, though. In the morning we will both need our strength to affright the villagers off.”

Taking the offered wrist as if it were a treasure, Raven Shade stated, “Never has any shown such trust in me before. I will drink with care, I promise.” Gently she laid her fangs to his skin and pierced it.

In the morning, before first light, the skulking villagers found King Neva Mar mounted, armed and ready for battle. Eyes slitted in rage, he declared, “So! This is the truth of the tale of a monster in these woods! I slept well and was undisturbed. It is YOU who are the monsters.” His sword sliding from its sheath with a sinister whisper of steel, King Neva Mar went on, “If you turn away now, I shall let you live!” At the nudge of a knee, his well trained war horse, Tschadow, charged into their midst. King Neva Mar laid about him with the flat of his blade, having no real wish to cause anyone serious harm.

Raven Shade screamed an unearthly howl from the stone pile that was her grave and ran down to his aid. The villagers broke and fled as if for their very lives.

Raven Shade leaned upon King Neva Mar’s stirrup and laughed again. Looking up, she said, “I shall miss you until you return, Good King. This has been the best night I have had since I was murdered here. I look forward to the keeping of your promise.”

Reaching down, King Neva Mar replied, “You look forward to it no more than I. The treaty with King Maulk of Ravenwood has been made for three months, now. As soon as I finish the map of the route, my people and the workers chosen by him will have the new road to the plains kingdoms done in a few more months.”

Now Raven Shade asked a question that clearly perplexed her. “Why do you make this road at all? You have the pass and all of the revenue of it already. The road to the plains kingdoms through King Gran’s lands in Callo is already there. Why change it? Even more, why would a King speak to a commoner, as I always was, of such weighty matters of State?”