ask-madhatterjeffersonâ:
David let out a long sigh. Okay. Jefferson was anxious, that much was abundantly clear. Heâs said a few times now that he wanted rules. The lack of them seemed to be exacerbating his anxiety. But the idea of imposing rules like Jefferson was a slave or a child felt so deeply, deeply wrong to him. They were equals, David should not be imposing rules and regulations on him.Â
But⌠if thatâs what Jefferson needed to feel stable? What other choice did he have? They could at least discuss it. Simple things, things that were good for him, that heâd likely choose to do anyways. âItâs okay. You have nothing to apologize for. Would⌠would you feel less anxious if we came up with someâŚâ gods, he didnât want to say it, âsome⌠rules? For you?â Heâd been stripped of his free will for so long, David supposed he could understand how a sudden lack of structure might leave him feeling untethered. âIf it would really help, if itâs what you want, we can do that.â He watched the way he held himself, anxious. Would⌠would he want a hug? Heâd ask him, once they figured the rest of this out. Â
He looked up at the question, a bit of his relieved disbelief oozing off of him for a moment, then he got a grip on his ability again and locked his emotions up. The situation was hard enough as it was without making mistakes like that.
âYes? Please, David?â He couldnât dare to believe it yet, but a bit of hope came to his eyes, to his posture. He still hugged himself, but his shoulders sagged forward a little less. âI donât know what to do. I donât have missions. Everythingâs confusing. Things are different. I look at them and think theyâll be something, but theyâre always little off. Or a lot. Things are never what I expect them. I donât⌠I donât know. Iâm lost,â he repeated, hoping against hope that David would understand and help. His metal fingers dug into his bicep hard enough to form bruises.
He had no idea why he trusted David this much, to speak this openly to him.
David was surprised when he felt the waves of relief and disbelief coming from Jefferson. He'd kept such a tight reign on his powers since he found him, it was rare for him to feel emotions coming from him, so David knew heâd made the right call. Jefferson was truly deeply relieved at the suggestion. He could see it in his eyes, too, and the way his shoulders relaxed a bit. So if thatâs what he needed, thatâs what they were going to do. It all made sense, what Jefferson was saying, and David heart broke all over again. His once confident, happy friend was so lost. David would be the one to find him, and to help him find himself.Â
He nodded reassuringly, âOkay. I understand. Thank you for explaining that to me. I know it isnât easy,â he said reassuringly, meeting his eyes with a small, gentle smile. He loved him. God, he loved him. His eyes dropped to where Jefferson was digging his metal fingers into his arm, and he reached out slowly, telegraphing his movements to make sure Jefferson saw what he planned and what he was going to do, and settled his hand gently on top of his metal fingers, hoping to still them. âWhy donât we start with you not hurting yourself, okay? Â