Stelletje nieuwschierige aagjes

“Don’t fish for compliments Amsterdam, or I’ll say Rotterdam just to spite you…”

FUNFACT: Rotterdam and Amsterdam have a long standing rivalry for some dark reason… Football, it’s because of football

Dutch cultural heritage:The Elfstedentocht is a 200 km skating race set on natural ice in the province of Frysia. It’s an important Dutch cultural phenomenon and completing the track gives the participant a heroic status. However in order to be able to skate the track the ice needs to be thick enough to cary all the participants. In recent years due to global warming the ice hasn’t been thick enough for a long time. The last elfstedentocht was twenty years ago. In 2012 it got really close, even though there was a lot of skating fun that winter it just wasn’t enough for an elfstedentocht.  

Some of the Dutch fear they might never see another elfstedentocht again… It doesn’t stem them very cheerfull. 

Januari

“What a question… I remember it very well”

“I was still young, a few decades independent perhaps. I sailed east to give Spain and Portugal some hell and perhaps find new trading partners while I was at it. However the sea is unpredictable and of my fleet of five battleships only one made the yourney with only 21 members of the crew left, more dead than alive. That is how the ‘love’ sailed into the waters of the town Usuki. The locals were friendly and gave us shelter, but completely raided our ship. Well with one-and-a-half a man and a horsehead, what was I to do but let it happen!”“I was taken to Edo, where my captain was interrogated by Tokugawa Ieyashu the military leader while I was to meet him. While I had met Asian countries before I had never seen something like him. He seemed to glide instead of walk, to be made out of porcelain. Both me and my captain must’ve said the right things somehow because from a prisoner I became a welcome guest.” “It didn’t happen straight away, but when the breath-taking Silver empire was dealing with an uprising from christians I helped him mow it down. They were all converted by Portugal and his annoying Jesuit missionaries. In Europe everyone was shocked I would turn on fellow Christians, but they didn’t understand. My ties with him were so much more important to me than a handful of Portugal’s Catholics. Well… He sure liked me after that. He was still very much on his own, only let me stay on a small island whenever I visited but- I had something nobody else had.”“We really had something special.”

NSFW art under cut

 Fijn Sinterklaasfeest gewenst

As the personification of the Netherlands, I hold all my holidays and traditions very close to my heart. Even if my citizens sometimes forget where a holiday came from, or some traditions go into disuse. As an imortal though I have a long memory of them all. I hope people will not forget them as they make me who I am.That said if I had to choose a favorite… Despite all recent developments it has to be Sinterklaas. The Sinterklaas period lasts a couple of weeks and contains many different traditions. It’s sort of odd that as a Protestant country I never stopped celebrating the life of this saint, but he’s just that important to me. Every year the good Saint arrives per steam boat. Tons of children gather to welcome him. I always make sure to go. The children recieve candy and wave flags and we sing songs. 

“Are you familiar with the concept ‘buying’ and ‘giving as a gift’? It means that when your sultan Suleyman gave me one that means it’s no longer yours it’s mine now, and later when I bought all those tulips, those also aren’t yours anymore they’re mine now!”

“Behold, my horse of steel! … I named her Bertha. It doesn’t really deserve a beauty award, It’s just an old grandma-bike I bought from a bike junkie. Illegal, I know but where else are you going to get a bike for only 25 euro’s?”

“It was supposed to be a temporary option after my last bike got stolen. Still it has been months and Bertha still hasn’t broken down or been stolen. It seems some weird murphy’s law: Nice bikes are stolen the same week but crap-bikes last forever… “