âLet me say it bluntly: Pregnancy is barbaric. I do not believe, as many women are now saying, that the reason the pregnancy is viewed as not beautiful is strictly due to cultural perversion⌠Pregnancy is the temporary deformity of the body of the individual for the sake of the species. Moreover, childbirth hurts. And it isnât good for you. Three thousands years ago, women giving birth ânaturallyâ had no need to pretend that pregnancy was a real trip, some mystical orgasm (that far-away look). The Bible said it: pain and travail. The glamour was unnecessary: women had no choice. They didnât dare squawk. But at least they could scream as loudly as they wanted during their labour pains. And after it was over, even during it, they were admired in a limited way for their bravery; their valour was measured by how many children (sons) they could endure bringing into the world. Today all this has been confused. The cult of natural childbirth itself tells us how far weâve come from true oneness with nature. Natural chilbirth is only one more part of the reactionary hippie-Rousseauean Return-to-Nature, and just as self-conscious. Perhaps a mystification of childbirth, true faith, makes it easier for the woman involved. Pseudo-yoga exercises, twenty pregnant women breathing deeply on the floor to the conductorâs baton, may even help some women develop 'properâ attitudes (as in 'I didnât scream onceâ). The squirming husband at the bedside, like the empathy pains of certain tribesmen ('Just look what I go through with you, dearâ), may make women feel less alone during her ordeal. But the fact remains: childbirth is at best necessary and tolerable. It is not fun. (Like shitting a pumpkin, a friend of mine told me when I inquired about the Great-Experience-Youâre-Missing. Whatâs-wrong-with-shitting-shitting-can-be-fun says the School of the Great Experience. It hurts, she says. Whatâs-wrong-with-a-little-pain-as-long-as-it-doesnât-kill-you? answers the school. It is boring, she says. Pain-can-be-interesting-as-an-experience says the school. Isnât that a rather high price to pay for interesting experience? she says. But-look-you-get-a-reward, says the school: a-baby-all-your-own-to-fuck-up-as-you-please. Well, thatâs something, she says. But how do I know it will be a male like you?)â
Shulamith Firestone, The Dialect of Sex (1970)
My friends, now of baby-having age, are ALL about this natural childbirth stuff. One dear friend, while she didnât make that mystical orgasm claim, was saying how the movements of giving birth are reminiscent of having sex. Another friend required major surgery sometime in her second trimester I think due to the fetus literally deforming her insides (due to a previously unknown anomalous digestive tract that would have given her no trouble had she not been pregnant) and experienced excruciating pain throughout her pregnancy with minimal medication - but for some reason plans to do it all again. Her twin sister had to watch all that terrorâŚand yet is now pregnant herself and wants to do all the natural stuff, too.
I cannot relate to this level of masochism. I guess itâs good that there are plenty of women who seem to genuinely want this ordeal, since Firestoneâs alternative (artificial wombs instead of women carrying and delivering) is an unappealing vision of the future. (Iâm thinking: Borg babies.) All I know is that if I were to find myself impregnated for any reason, I would do anything to get it out of me. It does NOT sound ânaturalâ to me, it does NOT sound mystical-orgasmic to me, it does NOT sound glamorous or a fulfillment of some feminine maternal destiny to me.
The truth is, maternal mortality is a real thing, and dying in childbirth is every bit as natural as a healthy delivery. Even in the United States. Even in cases where it should be preventable in this day and age, women die. (see http://www.arhp.org/publications-and-resources/contraception-journal/march-2011) The truth is, pregnant bodies are particularly vulnerable to state coercion. (see http://jhppl.dukejournals.org/content/early/2013/01/15/03616878-1966324.full.pdf+html) The truth is, women are still struggling to define our bodies as just that: our bodies, our being, our physical manifestation in this world - and being an incubator just doesnât make sense to me as part of that struggle.
Itâs almost as though we need to set aside a portion of the population thatâs just for this unpleasant deforming processes, convince them that they want this horrible travesty that may potentially be a self-sacrificing death, convince them that itâs in their nature to want it, tell them itâs glamorous or valorous or orgasmicâŚ.