ash

~

Halloween quickly rounded the corner and, soon, everyone was getting ready for the Vixen’s party. Andrew didn’t mind going, not if Neil was there. Besides, there weren’t going to be as many bodies as there would have been at Eden’s, so he didn’t have to worry about losing sight of Neil. After Baltimore, Andrew was hesitant to go into crowds without a firm grasp on Neil’s hand. He didn’t get as much anxiety from it anymore, but it still put him a little on edge whenever he’d see Neil vanish into a mass of people.

It would be fine. He might even end up enjoying himself, by some miracle.

Andrew finished popping in his fangs, then adjusted the collar on his cape. He thought about dribbling some fake blood from his bottom lip, but decided against it. It would be too much of a hassle to clean up after, plus he was sure it would leave a stain. It was the laziest vampire costume he’d ever seen, but it didn’t matter. Not like anyone would actually say anything to him.

Outside of the room, the Foxes were waiting. Dan and Matt in their detective outfits. Renee in her nymph costume. Allison, who was sitting on Renee’s lap, dressed up as Aphrodite. Andrew was surprised it wasn’t a repeat costume. Nicky was wearing an orange space suit with a cowboy hat. Aaron was literally just wearing his nurse scrubs. Then finally, Kevin, the second most boring only next to Aaron, wore a long, black cloak. If it weren’t for the scythe leaning against the couch, Andrew never would've guessed what he was supposed to be.

His eyes settled on Neil, wearing blue jeans that were messily ripped and stained with fake blood. His flannel shirt was made up in the same fashion. There were brown ears perched on top of his head and fangs, more noticeable than Andrew’s, in his mouth.

Allison laughed when she turned around and spotted Andrew. “A vampire and a werewolf,” she giggled into Renee’s shoulder. “You two’ll definitely win the couples costume contest.”

Neil blinked at her. “That’s not actually a thing, right?”

She shook her head. “No, but now I kinda wish we did a matchy thing, babe,” she whined, directing her attention to Renee.

Renee smiled at her girlfriend. “I’m sure Aphrodite had some nymphs that were always around her. And who would I have been, Hephaestus? Or perhaps Ares? Not exactly a model couple, are they?”

Allison contemplated this. “True. You can be the beautiful girl by the stream that caught my eye.” She kissed Renee on the cheek then got to her feet. “Let’s go, bitches. I wanna get there before Ari eats all the cheese puffs.”

Nicky laughed. “Ha! You know he’s already eaten half their stock.”

Allison took Renee’s hand and led the way to the study room in the basement. Everyone branched off to do their own thing. Neil and Andrew stood by the entrance, watching as everyone interacted with each other. Kevin was the only one missing, apparently taking his sweet time walking down the stairs.

“You can drink tonight, if you want,” Andrew said. “I’ll watch you.”

“That’s okay. I dragged you here, I won’t make you stay sober through the whole thing,” Neil responded.

“You didn’t drag me here. I—”

But before he could finish his sentence, the unaccounted for Fox cut him off. “Both of you drink. I’m staying sober anyway. Might as well have something to keep me occupied.”

Andrew raised an eyebrow at him. When Kevin met his gaze, he nodded approvingly. It was good that Kevin was trying to quit drinking. If anything was going to bring about Kevin’s demise, it would be Andrew, not liver problems.

Neil was a lightweight. This wasn’t new information to Andrew, but it was still amusing to watch as Neil stumbled around on the dance floor, swept up by the other Foxes. Dan twirled him around, Allison pulled him into a tango, Matt even lifted him off the ground at one point. The music was loud, people spoke among themselves, adding to the noise, yet Andrew could hear Neil’s laughter loud and clear.

“You two are good together,” Kevin said. Andrew almost jumped out of his skin, having forgotten he was even there. “I don’t think I’ve ever told you that.”

Andrew took another sip of his drink. “You couldn’t have bothered to do face paint? The only reason people know you’re a grim reaper is because of your scythe and you don't even hold it most of the time,” he said, effectively ignoring Kevin’s comment.

Kevin snorted. “Says the guy who wore a cape and fangs you can’t even see unless you talk. Didn’t you buy a packet of fake blood?”

“The cape has red lining and a high collar. That’s the universal sign for vampire.”

“Hey, I can’t judge, I’m just a guy in a cloak.”

Andrew didn’t respond, turning his attention back to Neil, who broke from the group and was making his way toward where the two of them were seated. Or where one of them was seated. Andrew hadn’t realized Kevin was gone until Neil plopped himself down next to him and let his head rest on Andrew’s shoulder, breathing heavily. He really did have that whole grim reaper thing down.

Neil took hold of Andrew’s hand and mindlessly started playing with his fingers. After three years, the yes or nos for small touches like this were few and far between. Neil trusted himself enough to read Andrew in these kinds of situations, and vice versa.

He must’ve really been tipsy because he brought a hand up and didn’t even hesitate before brushing the hair out of Neil’s face. He was getting soft. The thought should’ve bothered him more than it actually did. Maybe it was the alcohol. He didn’t know. He didn’t want to think about it. It didn’t matter in that moment anyway.

“Having fun, Josten?” he asked, trying to take as much sincerity out of his voice as possible.

“Yeah,” Neil whispered.

Andrew felt Neil’s breath against his neck. He was not a man who wanted often, but in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to drag Neil away and hoard him for himself.

But he couldn’t.

Not when Dan skipped up to them, a giddy smile on her face, and yelled “Neil, come on! This is our song!” Andrew knew she meant that it was the Foxes’ collective song. They always paused whatever they were doing to sing along to it whenever it came on. Andrew still remembered the time they were kicked out of a supermarket at three in the morning because that song started playing through the loudspeaker.

Neil stood up, but Dan didn’t move. She looked at Andrew with that same smile and jerked her head in the direction of the dance floor. He was about to refuse until he met Neil’s gaze, eyes bright, a slight grin on his face. A grin that widened significantly when Andrew got to his feet. He grabbed Andrew’s hand and pulled him in the direction of all the other Foxes.

And it was all of the other Foxes. Even Aaron and Kevin (sans scythe) were there, awkwardly bobbing along with everyone else. Andrew and Neil completed the group, spreading a new wave of energy through the space. They all danced together. It was probably the first time they’d ever done so. It was like they were in their own little world, no one else existing but them. Though, even as out of it as Neil was, he still made sure Andrew wasn’t getting accidentally brushed up against.

The song ended, the energy that had been building up between the nine of them fell flat, so Neil led Andrew outside. The music cut off as the door closed. It was blissfully quiet, the only noise being the sound of Neil’s breathing. It was cold enough that you could see his breath in the air. Neil leaned his head against the brick wall, closing his eyes, and smiled.

Andrew couldn’t help but think he was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen.

Neil cracked an eye open to look at him. “Staring,” he said, before closing it again.

He almost told Neil to stop talking, but he held his tongue from the familiar retort, wanting to hear what else Neil had to say.

“I never could’ve imagined myself here,” Neil started up again after Andrew gave no reaction. “Not in a million years.”

“What, drunk at a college party?” Andrew guessed.

“Happy,” Neil corrected. “Alive. With a family.”

Andrew went silent again.

Neil opened his eyes fully, looking Andrew up and down. “You know, the vampire thing is kind of hot.”

Andrew huffed out a laugh, a rare occurrence that always earned him a starry eyed look from a certain loudmouth, red-head. “Has anyone ever told you you’re insufferable?”

“Yes, actually. I have some articles I can pull up if you want proof,” Neil said with an innocent smile.

Andrew rolled his eyes, then hooked a hand into the collar of Neil’s flannel. “Shut up and kiss me, Josten.”

“Gladly, Minyard.”

Their lips met and it was blissfully quiet once more. Andrew took Neil’s werewolf ears off, so he could have easier access to Neil’s hair. Neil wrapped his arms around Andrew’s shoulders, kissing him back gently. Andrew knew it was so he wouldn’t damage Andrew’s fangs. Andrew was not taking the same precautions, having to pull back when one of Neil’s fell to the ground.

Neil, who looked ridiculous as he laughed with his uneven teeth, placed his forehead against Andrew’s. “Thank you,” he whispered, a secret between the two of them.

Images of Binghamton flashed through Andrew's brain. The intensity of Neil’s stare, the sad acceptance in his slight grin, the way his mouth moved as he said, “Thank you. You were amazing.” Those thoughts should’ve caused a panic to shoot through Andrew’s chest, but they didn’t. Its absence was strange, but not entirely unwelcome.

He covered Neil’s mouth, then said, “Stop talking.” before removing his hand and kissing him again. This time, it was softer. It didn’t last very long, but it was long enough for Andrew to realize what took its seat in the place Panic should’ve been.

It was the undeniable thrum of Knowing.

There was no panic because Andrew knew, he knew, that this time, Neil wasn’t going anywhere.

No.