jefferson

“Jefferson.” Jane began sternly, leaning down to capture his gaze once more. “We will get to the bottom of this, but we can’t dive into it now. The incident is still so fresh and your mind so blurry that there’s no way we could get anywhere conclusive. So why don’t we just sit for now, hm? Let’s sit and try to relax and perhaps something will come to you.”

Jane closed the gap between them, taking his hands into her own and inspecting them carefully. “They don’t look torn up and I haven’t caught word of any incidents on the premises..” The girl shook her head, looking up at him and placing a hand on his cheek. “Did you take your medication? Is it possible that this was a hallucination?”

Jane blinked again, this time out of surprise. “Yes, of course.” She said quickly but in a hushed tone, quickly grabbing her mug before leading him out of the kitchen. The girl brought him into her office, being sure to lock the door behind them before turning to take a good look at him. “Jefferson, what’s the matter?”

Jane stood beside the Keurig in the patient kitchen, tapping her pen against the countertop as she waited for the sluggish machine to brew her third (fourth?) cup of coffee. She had just taken her boards and found it rather difficult to get any sleep since then, so she threw herself into her work; reviewing cases, taking on new patients, anything to keep her mind off of that phone call she was expecting. The girl must have nodded off as she waited because as soon as somebody entered the kitchen, she shot up straight, blinking several times to look as though she’d been awake. “Hm? Oh, sorry, am I hogging the machine?”

Belle was beginning to feel anxious from being held up in the same place for so long. She missed her usual routine of organizing her books at home, visiting her father, going to the farmer’s market twice a week, hiking to find good reading spots, and enjoying wine with dinner nightly, among other things.

In exchange for feeling so anxious, she had been drinking tea like it was about to go out of style. It had become such a common occurrence for Belle to have a mug of tea in her hands that earlier in the week a nurse had stopped to check on her because she was seen without one. After her morning walk out in the gardens, Belle made her way into the kitchen where she put a kettle of water on the stove for a cup, and leaned against the counter as the water began to boil, reading a worn out copy of Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets. 

“Just going through osmosis on my floor. You know, nothing out of the ordinary.” Jane chuckled softly, turning her head to face him as he laid beside her. Naturally, her expressive brows quirked at the mention of good news. “Oh? Please, tell me everything good you’ve got. I need to hear it.” She smiled faintly, reaching between them and brushing her fingers against the back of his still-bandaged hand.

Rather than being perched in the chair behind her desk, Jane was laying on the floor of her office, the palms of her hands covering her tired eyes. It had been days since she’d gotten a wink of sleep, as she’d spent most of her time poring over Jefferson’s observation tapes – which, frankly, she still hadn’t watched in their entirety. She would keep starting and stopping them at the rough parts, the parts that physically hurt to watch. But she swore she would come up with a plan by their meeting tonight – she had to come up with a plan by their meeting tonight. 

Jane let out a long groan, which was just loud enough to drown out the sound of someone entering her office. It wasn’t until they shut the door behind them that she shot upright, her hands falling to her lap. A look of surprise flickered across her features when she saw Jefferson standing before her. “It’s not time for our appointment already?”

Jane fell silent, shifting to sit back in her seat. He was right; her expectations were exceeding who he truly was. Of all people, she should have known that the best – and yet there she was, thinking that the fact they had grown both physically and emotionally close would resolve whatever disorders he suffered from, would make him normal. Jane winced. “You’re right. I’m being foolish.” She admitted, smoothing out her skirt anxiously. After a brief moment of hesitation, she looked up at him, her demeanor shifting from soft to professional. “Perhaps it’s time we regroup, then. I’ll leave you to rest and recover so I can do some further research. Although your observation didn’t end well, it provided me with enough to begin fleshing out your case.” 

“Stop taking all of this so lightly.” Jane’s tone took on a sharp edge, her brows scrunching together in frustration. “You could have died, Jefferson. I was afraid you were going to – and you’re just here, chuckling about this? Making comments about kissing me when you could have –” She huffed, withdrawing her hand and sitting back in her seat. “You’re missing my point.”

Jane gently brushed his wild hair back with her fingertips, a sad smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “Don’t apologize, Jefferson. You didn’t hurt me. Truthfully, I should be the one apologizing to you.” She sniffled a bit, quickly blinking back tears as she still fiddled with his hair, effectively averting eye contact. “The session went on for entirely too long and, as a result, you hurt yourself terribly. You have some cracked bones in your hand and a mild concussion. You could have bled out, Jefferson, and it’s my fault. I didn’t put a stop to it. I wasn’t looking out for you the way I should have been. I’m so sorry.” Jane pressed her lips together in a taut line, finally meeting his gaze. “Perhaps I shouldn’t be your doctor anymore.”

Jane hadn’t slept a wink since the incident. How could she possibly, especially since she had been the one to orchestrate this entire observation to begin with. This was her fault. Jefferson’s injuries – his blood loss, his concussion, his mangled hand – were all her fault. So, rather than resting, the girl put every ounce of her energy into ensuring he was properly cared for. She directed every infirmary nurse, spoke with every doctor, and remained at his bedside through it all. 

However, she knew that would change when he woke up – it would have to. There would have to be more distance, more balance, and far less acting upon feelings between them – if they even maintained their doctor-patient relationship at all. So it was understandable that she felt a twinge of sadness when he awoke and immediately reached for his IV. And it was entirely acceptable for her eyes to fill with tears when she swatted his hand away and gently pushed him back to his bed. “Don’t do that.” She spoke softly, her voice cracking under the weight of her own sadness and guilt. 

“You have everything you need.” Jane quickly protested in response to Jefferson’s escalating anger. “Enough is enough. Stop torturing my patient –” Before she could even hear her colleagues agree, the brunette watched in horror as Jefferson collapsed on the floor. Without hesitation, Jane abandoned her journal and darted out of the observation deck, down the stairs and to the unconscious man’s aid. She fell to the floor beside him, skidding to a stop on her knees just beside him, her expertly trained hands pressing down on his largest wounds to control the bleeding. Before long, several infirmary nurses arrived, replacing Jane and lifting Jefferson onto a gurney to transport him for treatment. With tears in her eyes, the small girl glared daggers at each doctor in the observation deck before ascending the stairs, reclaiming her journal with her bloodied hands, and rushing to the infirmary to ensure Jefferson was alright.

Jane struggled to remain impartial and almost stone-faced as she observed Jefferson’s responses to the negative stimuli. After all, she had been the one to suggest this method of research, and there was no way her colleagues wouldn’t pick up on the romance between them if she’d watched in horror like she wanted to. Instead, she simply scribbled down notes in her journal, her jaw clenching as Jefferson bashed his fists into a wall.

The doctors murmured around her, focusing more on each other than they did on Jefferson after a while. When the moment was right, the brunette placed her finger on the glass, lining it up to be just where Jefferson’s heart was. Quickly, she mouthed, “It’s almost over.”

“Whenever you feel ready. It could be as soon as tomorrow. I just want to ensure you don’t rush into it. This is going to be incredibly stressful, Jefferson, on your mind, your body, on me –” Jane stopped short, ducking her head down to hide her deep blush. “I just want you to be safe throughout all of this.”

Jane’s features scrunched together into a look of concern. “Jefferson.” She spoke softly, setting her journal on her desk and standing. As soon as he turned back to face her, she closed the distance between them, placing her hands on the tops of his arms. “You won’t hurt me, with or without safety precautions.” Her lips twitched up into a quick smile, her fingers moving to gently brush his hair away from his face. “If it would make you feel better, we can pull out all the stops for this. There are observation rooms on the second level of the doctor’s wing that I’m certain we could utilize. They’re made to protect me and you. So what do you say? Are you willing to give this a try?”