7:00 AM. Yet ANOTHER day for Noelle Holiday to face. Throwing off the covers to her bed, she didn't have to force herself up--her dream had come true. She was going to the festival with Susie!! She hadn't been asked directly though Noelle thought maybe she or maybe even Susie would ask--but it surprised her when Susie told her MOM, ice queen mayor herself....that she was taking her daughter to the festival!! Yawning and stretching out, she made her way to the bathroom.
"My hair....again." Noelle frowned, looking at herself in a sad state. She had to really shampoo this time. Sighing and undressing herself, Noelle walked into the shower stall turning on the shower head, letting the water flow. She stood there in that bathtub, thinking on things and what she told Susie the other day. They really got a chance to talk for once...it was nice. I mean, it was kinda awkward but Susie was just kinda awkward naturally and that was ok. Taking up the shampoo, she grabbed a bottle noting the "apple scent! all natural no dyes" mark on it--oh, the apple shampoo--she bought because she thought it might make her smell like apples and drive her away from...Kris. Kris.
"Kris." Noelle said their name out loud in the shower which wasn't unusual. Other than Susie, Kris was the only other person she really thought about constantly. She tried to bury her feelings but she couldn't deny them. She...didn't know how Kris felt about her. Did they even want to be friends anymore? Did her words about their history impact them at all? Kris was in the closet while her and Susie talked after all...they could hear every word...every HURTFUL word and she knew it.
As the steam rose and her fur and yellow hair became cleaner the harder she rubbed, she couldn't help but think about them more. Why was Kris acting so--social all of a sudden? Years ago...when...it...happened, Kris had grown distant from everyone, especially her. No reason stated, no malice communicated. One day, they were playing at her house and the next, she never saw them again outside of school. Even then, it was Kris mostly sleeping at their desk or her tutoring them on schoolwork. Kris kept it professional, never talked about anything other than schoolwork. Turning off the water, Noelle closed her eyes and clenched her fists.
"C'mon, you can move on Elly! Don't think about them today. You can't mess this up!" The doe's teeth chattered as soon as she got out of the shower and grabbed the nearest heavy towel meant for furred creatures for maximum warmth and water absorption. Only the finest for the Holidays Carol quoted.
"If it was up to Mom, we'd all wash ourselves in a public bath!!" Noelle laughed given her Mom's quiet obsession with otaku culture and Japan in general.
Noelle stopped laughing as she heard a knock at the door.
"Honey, can you meet me in the kitchen? I just want to go over a few things today for the festival."
"Sure, Mom! Just gotta finish up!" Noelle yelled back with a nervous flare, quickly drying her body and plopping her fuzzy butt on the toilet, shaking. The "talk" from yesterday was more intense than usual..."How DARE you allow that...stranger to just touch December's things!! You don't even know her!!"
She was WRONG about Susie, Noelle thought. She didn't know her like she did...well, admittedly, she knew more about Susie than she did yesterday but not nearly as much as she did about Kris.
"Oop, too much chocolate from the convenience store again--sweet eggnog!!" Noelle grabbed the counter to her side. She would be a minute.
After answering nature's call and getting herself prettied up, Noelle rushed down the stairs into the kitchen where her Mom sat at the table sipping a hot cocoa. She was dressed in the same blue professional suit she always wore. The only thing different was the additional wrinkles in her face that had formed from the anger displayed at Susie's entrance into her home.
"Go on Noelle, it's getting cold." Carol motioned with her head, taking another sip.
Noelle hurried to a chair at the dining room table across from her, taking the cup and beginning to sip noting the green and red marshmallows melting in the cup.
"I know what you're going to say Mom and I..."
"Dear, just listen. I was angry yesterday...Angel forbid I can't help it sometimes. I know I frighten you and I never wanted that, my dear...it's just my nature to be controlling. My own parents couldn't help that because they lost control of everything for a good long time. I suppose they instilled that in me to a very dangerous degree. I just want you to know that everything I've been doing these past several years is to your and the Dreemurrs' benefit...to make us whole again."
"M-Mom, I don't see how..." Noelle began, expressing doubt in her words.
"Just let me finish. Your father is dying...he might not say it publicly but we both know he hasn't much time left. As much as I hate to say it, I think we have to accept the inevitable. That's not to say there isn't hope, Noelle but we'll keep fighting for him as long as we can."
"*sniff* O-Ok, Mom..." Noelle was suddenly assaulted by the negative feelings she thought of every time she went to the hospital, seeing her father in that hospital bed coughing up a lung every time he moved the wrong way.
Noting Noelle's response, Carol softened her stance and reached out, placing a hand on Noelle's looking at her softly.
"I am sorry, Noelle. I've been distant and harsh with you for far too long. We all have our vices and mine is too hard to bear at times. Unfortunately, you'll felt the brunt of it with me being gone, December missing and your father. Kris, I admit, has been helpful in getting me through this entire ordeal." Carol relayed, Noelle raising her head.
"Kris?! Since when was Kris..."
"Dear, Kris was not keeping their distance from you out of hatred or spite. It was guilt." Carol explained. "They came to me after the incident, crying into my lap and saying how it's their fault this happened. Being the mother, I am, I couldn't help but try and comfort them in their time of need. I embraced them and let them cry for a good long time, told them it was going to be all right."
"W--Why didn't you tell me this to begin with?! What happened?" Noelle stood up, abound with freshly baked anger.
"Sit down and I'll tell you." Carol got firm for a minute but in a gentle way, Noelle sitting down in a huff. "Kris...didn't want to hurt you like they thought they hurt December. They did want to help though, as much as they could. So me and Kris have been working in secret to find your sister. A lot of painful research, sleepless nights and more research..."
"W-wait, is that why Mr. Asgore has been around here every so often?"
"Partly and I am financially supporting his flower shop in exchange for any leads he might dig up for me in the meantime. I was...angry when I removed him from the force rather forcefully. Probably didn't help that he and Toriel were fighting constantly..."
"M-Mom...do you feel guilty for them divorcing? I know Kris couldn't have taken it very well when it happened."
"They didn't. When it officially happened, it was the only thing Kris could talk about for the last several days to me and their brother." Carol recalled. "I... just listened. There was nothing I could do in all my power to stop it just like your sister's disappearance. However, I could be there for them when Kris felt they could go to no one else."
"W-why wouldn't they just...talk to me?!" Noelle slammed her fists on the table, beginning to tear up. "WHY?! All these years, I thought they hated me...and all this time, the only person they hated was themself. We could've leaned on each other...all this time..."
"Noelle..." Carol got up, genuinely concerned for her daughter's well-being and placed both hands on her shoulders as she began to weep. "I did not wish to tell you this on such a festive day as today. I really did not. However, I could not as they say--do it anymore. I had to say something, especially after yesterday's incident. I don't want to feel you are trapped if your father passes away. Kris very much wants to be a part of your life but feels they aren't worthy of your friendship...or your love. I very much have tried to tell them otherwise, but they wouldn't budge. I doubt they've talked to anyone else. When you go the festival today...reach out to them. Talk to them, encourage them. That...Susie girl has somehow managed to become their friend, yes?"
"Fahaha, I didn't even think you cared to know her name..." Noelle looked up at her Mom with a small smile.
"Oh, believe me dear, as mayor I must be aware of all who exist within our little town." Carol pat her back. "Now give your Mom a hug."
The two embraced grey fuzz to brown fuzz, tears running down both their faces.
"M-Mom...you're...warm? It feels good." Noelle giggled while wiping her tears away, looking at her Mom with relief for once.
"Believe me dear, I've wanted to come out of the cold for a very long time. I was just too stubborn." Carol kept her arm tight around her sole remaining daughter. "N-Now...let's have a good festival, huh?"
"O-Ok, Mom!!" Noelle smiled, looking her old self for the first time in a long time.
"And dear, if you want to..."hang out" with your friend...Susie, I will not get in your way. Just no funny business, all right?" Carol became stern Mom again.
"We'll be in public, Mom! I think we'll be all right." Noelle giggled.
"Then run along. Remember what we talked about, okay?" Carol raised a single finger.
"Ok, bye Mom!!" Noelle ran off, all excited. Carol stood there, glancing upon the barely sipped hot cocoa her daughter failed to consume.
"And Mom? Thank you...I appreciate it." Noelle blew a kiss to her, Carol catching it in her hand and running off.
"(Better put that in a container for later.)" Carol noted, picking up the cocoa mug. "(That Kris is always on the hunt for barely used cocoa.)"
It was hard, Carol told herself. She had wanted to be honest with her family and friends but could not. She would not lose anyone else...she would not lose "control" like her parents did. She would freeze them all in place if she had to for their own good. That's why she felt only a partial release upon telling Noelle a part of the overall "truth". It was true that her and Kris were working together to "find" December. The only thing is...she was already found. It was the situation she was in that she was trying to deal with.
"Angel forgive me for what I must do." Carol stood at the sink. "Kris, Noelle...I am so sorry."
Outside in the brilliant fall air, Noelle skipped to the family gate for the first time in what felt forever. Kris didn't hate her!! Kris didn't hate her!! She was all excited when she noticed the two waiting outside her gate.
"Oh...hey guys!!" Noelle waved cheerfully, Kris and Susie waving back. They both look tired and ragged, Kris especially. How had she not noticed it before? Had she just written it off as them not getting enough sleep?
"S'up, Noelle?" Susie grinned, arm wrapped around Kris, Kris looking forlorn. "Ready to go with us?"
"U-Us?" Noelle grinned, sweat running down her face.
US?! US?! But she thought--wasn't it just--the--two of them? No, no...come back to Earth Noelle. What were you thinking--of course Kris would be going too. The two have been inseparable for the last few days....hanging out in the closet, touching...brooms?? Going to the diner....together. Having a sleepover...
"Well, yeah...who else?" Susie got confused. "What, you thought Nerdly was going to show up and try to swoon you to his side?"
"No no..." Noelle shook her head, trying to collect her thoughts. "I just thought...the way you announced it to my Mom...that it would just be...us."
"Oh." Susie rubbed the back of her head, feeling a little guilty as she twirl her hair in her fingers. "Um, well...to be honest, I kinda asked Kris about it and then that boy...Kris said yes naturally(in the weirdest way possible) and you know the other boy's response."
"Right." Noelle whispered, grabbing her arm in disappointment, Kris grimacing at the sight. "I suppose I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions faha."
"Hey, that's not to say we can't hang out on our own another time! I just wanted everyone to have a day to remember." Susie wrapped her other arm around Noelle with the other situated around Kris. "Y'know, just...have a fun, normal (NON dark world) day with my friends?"
Kris and Noelle looked at one another and then to Susie who looked forlorn herself. As if they knew what to do without looking, the two of them hugged Susie, who blushed immediately upon contact. She was initially resistant but given what happened at Kris' house the last night, she let them stay in the bear hug...for about ten seconds.
"OK, ENOUGH ALREADY!" Susie pushed both Kris and Noelle off to their butts, the two of them laughing. Noelle looked to Kris, who looked genuinely happy. What had she done to wake Kris up...it was amazing to say the least.
"All right, Susie...let's go with Kris to the festival!" Noelle cheered as Susie quickly help both of them up with two arms, Kris and Noelle dusting each other off.
"Okay!" Susie cheered, Kris forming a small smile as she said it. Waitaminute, were they--
It couldn't be. They...couldn't be...a thing, right? No no, Susie would've said.
"Noelle? You ok?" Susie waved a hand in front of her face. "You froze up for a minute."
"Oh! Sorry...I kinda did, fahaha." Noelle closed her eyes, emitting a nervous laugh that even concerned Kris she noticed. Kris...
Kris cared about her...Susie cared about her...
Why couldn't she have her cake and eat it too?
"Um, so...I noticed you guys weren't looking so good when I walked towards the gate?" Noelle quickly changed the subject so she could give herself some breathing room. "Anything happen?"
"Oh, nothin' much...just the local store owner/janitor dancing with Kris' Mom all night long." Susie rolled her eyes then looking to Kris who looked away in disgust.
"...what?" Noelle whispered. Toriel was the kindest soul she had ever known. Why would she...
"K-Kris, has this been going on for awhile?" Noelle came up to them, wrapping her arms around Kris' right. Kris didn't respond at first but then nodded in affirmation. "These late night...parties?"
"Surprised we didn't hear anything..." Noelle mused but figured she wouldn't given she has her headphones on most of the time, noise cancelling to drown out Berdley's livestreams and her Mom. "But Kris, that's awful! I know we haven't really talked that much...in a long time, but would you give me a chance? Please?"
"I...I don't want to burden you." Kris answered in a monotone voice.
"Kris, I don't care about the past! I just want you!" Noelle said, wide eyed as Kris and Susie looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Umm...that came out wrong????"
"What do you mean?" Susie walked up.
"Haha, oh my god...I knew that shit you spat out was bullshit." Susie laughed, slapping her belly. "Forced? C'mon girl."
"*spudder* Oh, give me a break here! It's complicated...WE'RE COMPLICATED!" Noelle stamped her hoof, Kris nodding in agreement at that statement and crossing their arms. "Kris...I just want you back in my life. So please...talk to me."
Susie sighed, shoving her hands into her pockets.
"LOOK. You guys have issues...I get it. Take a few minutes, walk...whatever. I'm gonna see if I can steal any ice cream from the janitor."
With that, Susie took off leaving the two of them alone...again. The both of them stared at her longingly and then back at each other, blushing and clasping their hands together.
"Fahaha! Don't copy me, Kris!" Noelle punched their shoulder. "It's not nice!"
Kris explained something about instinct and sugar plum does reacting to scary things.
"Oh Kris...I really missed you." The doe reached out, caressing their face. "Is it...really you?"
Kris told Noelle to close their eyes. She did so, hearing a bit of a gasp of pain and then felt something neatly shoved into her pocket.
"...Now it is. You can open them." Kris stated.
"It...your voice, you don't sound like you're on loudspeaker anymore." Noelle gazed at the human in amazement. "What did you shove in my pocket?"
"Don't touch it whatever you do...something that's kept me distracted, as it were." Kris sighed, glancing at the pocket. "Noelle...I don't know what a few minutes is gonna do to change..."
A single hard-tipped finger was placed upon the human's lips, silencing them in midspeak.
"Hush. Let's just start with the elephant in the room." Noelle began, encouraging Kris to sit on the sidewalk with her. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I...couldn't." Kris began. "When Dess disappeared, I was overwhelmed. I didn't know what to do, what to think. I just wanted to bury myself under the covers and not talk to anyone ever again. I would cry for hours at a time. Then finally, several days after it had happened...I went to your Mom."
"Y-Yeah, she told me...you cried into her knees and told her sorry over and over again. You...you never told anyone, did you?"
"I told your Mom what happened that day...I felt like she at the very least deserved it and whatever happened to me, whatever punishment needed to happen...I would accept it. Instead, she...just hugged me and told me to let it all out...like I was the victim." Kris began to sob themselves thinking about it. "But I wasn't--I wronged her! I...."
"Kris." Noelle wrapped an arm around them. "Kris, what happened to Dess...whatever happened...I know you would never hurt another soul intentionally. It's not in your nature. You're our Krismas!! My shining beacon of light, my Merry Krismas fahaha! To let yourself fester in guilt like that isn't healthy. I thought you hated me for the longest time. Hell, if you'd reach out and we'd stayed together, we'd both be talking to each other about Susie's tail!"
"...Yeah, you're right about that last part." Kris stifled a small laugh, the two of them laughing together for the first time in a long while.
The two went silent, just sitting there and allowing the leaves from the tree to blow off and fly past them. It was a wonderous sight to both, seeing time past them by as the both of them seemed to be anchored down by it out of choices made long ago. But...did it have to be that way? Couldn't they both take the wheel and help each other back to the right direction...have a future?
"Kris, whatever's in my pocket...will it blow up or something if I take it out?" Noelle asked.
"..." Kris was silent. "No but it will give you an idea."
"Tell me...do I want to know what's going on, what you're involved in with my Mom?" Noelle narrowed her gaze.
"You would but it'd probably freak you out. I wanted to protect you from it, for as long as possible. I realize now that it's unfair to blind you to the truth. You're your own person, just like anyone."
"...I get it now, I do Kris." Noelle closed her eyes again. "Take it out and put it back wherever it goes."
Kris sighed, reaching in gently and then slamming the soul back into place, restoring Kris to themselves.
"Kris, I'm gonna catch up to Susie. If you need a minute to collect yourself, take it. Me and Susie will be waiting for you...all right?" Noelle smiled.
Kris nodded, looking off in the distance as Noelle began to walk but then looked as she stopped, looking back earnestly.
"I...miss her a lot, y'know Kris? But, when I think about it...I think I missed you...most of all."
With that and a blush as bright as Rudolph's red nose tonight, Noelle took a flight as Kris sat there in disbelief at the statement. What was there to miss? The filthy, dirty sister taker...Kris Dreemurr began to bubble and curdle in the hot pot of guilt once again left to their own thoughts. What would have happened, should she have seen their soul? More questions? More accusations? What...
"The seeds of rebellion I sense...seeds that must be PLUCKED."
It was faint at first, the sharp pain in Kris' back but then it became apparent upon the sudden burst of pain as a black katana blade pressed through their lower body and was quickly pulled out. Looking back, Kris looked upon the face of Carol Holiday who looked upon them in guilt.
"Dess told me of what's transpired these last several days, how irritatingly close you've become with that dragon girl. I don't blame you in this regard. You've been denied companionship for the longest time...a life of your own...a FUTURE. I always told you the reason I do this, Kris. For some reason, you are wavering. Did I wrong you or did December? Tell me Kris." Carol held blade out to the side, red blood splattered across her face and blade. "Oh, I'm sorry...you're too busy bleeding out. Not to worry, you'll serve your purpose whether you want to or not. I've seen to that."
Kris crawled on the ground, bleeding heavily and gasping for air as they held on to the wound for dear life. Out of nowhere, the Knight floated to the ground looking at Kris in a look of surprise and then to Carol.
"Don't look at me like that. You knew what was coming." Carol reminded her.
The Knight's visor narrowed and then turned to Kris, who carefully picked Kris up into her arms and flew off hurriedly to bandage the wound to prevent further bleeding. As soon as they were gone, Carol dropped the katana and collapsed to the ground in shock, on her knees realizing what she'd done.
"Oh Angel, if there is a hell out there...please throw me into the flames. I do not deserve your mercy." Carol cried into her hands.
In the woods not too far away, Kris moaned as December placed Kris on the ground carefully and tended to their wounds raising a hand and unleashing the same purple energy she used to "pull in" Toriel except she was using to seal the wound this time.
"Hold my hand, it's gonna sting." December held out her right hand, Kris gripping it and closing their eyes as the energy hit the stab wound. Slowly but surely, the energy brought the skin back together, the human clenching their teeth in pain as Dess worked to heal her apprentice.
"W-Why did she..." Kris asked. "All this time, I...did everything she wanted."
"My Mom is batshit insane. What else do you want to know?" Dess's helmet came off, revealing her relatively normal face.
"What're...we gonna do?" Kris gasped as December completed her work.
"What you were gonna do to begin with...go to the festival. That little stunt back there was a "warning"...you don't want the full monty from her. Trust me. In the meantime, just...stick to the original plan. I'm gonna improvise."
"How???" Kris strained, looking at her.
"Dude, I'm not your friend Susie. I can't just will my way through this...but we certainly try, right?" Dess grinned.
"C'mere." Dess hugged Kris close, carefully. "Things are gonna be all right, somehow. Just go have some fun dude...even if you're in pain. The pain should numb in a few...just try and take it easy for now."
"Here...a new bloodless shirt. Can't have your friends asking questions, now can we?" Dess rolled her eyes.
"Y-Yeah." Kris admitted, catching the new green and yellow striped shirt. "December...am I worth it?"
"What, one hug wasn't enough for ya?" Dess laughed.
"N-No...I mean, do you think...I'm worth it for Noelle...for Susie?"
"..." Dess frowned. "Dude, I can tell you you're worth it and your friends can tell you but you gotta answer that for yourself."
With that, the Knight's visor came back on and saluted Kris, flying off in her ball form leaving Kris on the mend. Getting back up, Kris grunted and hobbled out of the woods to where they thought Noelle and Susie might be.
"There you are!" Susie waved to Kris, seeing them hobble to her and Noelle.
"Kris...we got you a fudgesicle!" Noelle giggled. "Did something happen?"
"No no...just gimme that fudgesicle." Kris quickly snatched it, placing it on their lower abdomen. "oooh, that feels better."
"What the hell, Kris? Did you get hurt in the few minutes we were separated?" Susie came to their side, concerned and lifting up their shirt slightly to see what Kris was trying to cool.
"Um, I..." Kris began, trying to hide the wound.
"Lemme look...GEEZ." Susie looked at the bruised part of Kris' belly where they had been stabbed. "Kris this looks horrible..."
"Susie is right, what in the cheese and crackers happened?!" Noelle poked her head in.
Suddenly, a familiar cold presence was felt on Kris' shoulder.
"They just took a nasty spill off the sidewalk when I took them by surprise...isn't that right, Kris?" Carol stood over them, unnerved by their unexpected presence, hand tightly on their right shoulder.
Kris merely nodded quickly in agreement.
"Mom? What're you doing here?" Noelle asked.
"You forgot your backpack, honey." Carol handed her bag to the girl who quickly nabbed it.
"Thanks...gosh, I would've felt like expired eggnog if I didn't remember it." Noelle remembered she had her phone in that bag.
"Have fun, honey...and Kris, don't forget about later on!" Carol grinned, Kris looking at them with a slight fear in their eyes. Noelle saw this, the same fear she felt from Carol. Why was Kris showing this same feeling? Noelle and Susie wrapped their arms around Kris who was glad to have Carol's hand off their body, walking them to the nearest bench.
"You wanna sit for a second?" Noelle whispered, Kris nodding in affirmation.
Both girls sat on either side of Kris of the bench, both concerned for their well being. As both girls wrapped their arms around their back, Kris began to shake uncontrollably. The act they had put on for so long began to crack and tears ran down their face.
"K-Kris?..." Noelle went quiet.
"Dude, you're leaking." Susie noted.
"I--I'm so sorry...so so sorry..."
Kris sobbed into their hands, Noelle and Susie looking upon Kris in pity. They don't know what had set them off but if it was anything, it was something their friends were there for them. They might not be worth of their love in their eyes...but Noelle and Susie were going to be there regardless. For Kris, that would be enough.
Author's Note: Welp, here we are again! Another chapter of Deltarune is on the verge of releasing. Decided to do another "What if?" style story prior to Chapter 5 this time. I hope you enjoyed and have fun with Chapter 5 everyone!!
