ARTFUL SPAM

I guess one of the benefits of being a head type is that you keep thinking, and thinking, and thinking, until one day everything ‘clicks’ into place and makes sense. I’ve found this is true of typing other people—the things that don’t make sense, that are inconsistent, stand out to me and BUG me. So I keep thinking about them, and shifting perspectives, and sometimes don’t know what’s “off” until I consider the RIGHT thing, something I hadn’t been seeing, and then it all fits.

This is especially true of people’s Enneagram types. Theoretical knowledge is well and good, but it’s still abstract—I can wrap my head around it and apply it, but seeing how an E type and its wing plays out in an ACTUAL person is a thousand times more useful than a conceptual thesis about what this “might” look like. One thing that has helped me is digging into attachment types and I may write a post about that one of these days with what I’ve learned, but it helps to ask myself if people are ‘attaching’ or not. That narrows down the scope considerably, and brings the 3, 6, and 9 more evidently to the surface of things.

Once you get a core right, also, it brings the entire person into ‘perspective’ and you start noticing wing differences/influences, as well as their first fix—which is indeed incredibly strong in many ways. So, I’m going to talk a little bit about the various core interactions with first fixes that I have observed in actual people.

6w5: the attachment aspect of the 6 is indeed strong. Much, much stronger, especially to institutions or organizations or belief systems, than it is for the 6w7. But they are, first and foremost, reactive types—especially if they have a 1 or an 8 fix. With 6-1, there’s a LOT of emphasis on rigidity in moral opinions, in black and white “right or wrong” viewpoints, and anger about people doing things wrong. They are more “centered” in themselves than the 6w7 or the 6-9. 5 brings in competency (and there’s a lot reactivity around them perceiving anyone as seeing them as ‘stupid’ or ‘ignorant’ or ‘incompetent’), but they are the “warmer” 5 than an actual 5. Less alien, more relatable, but also more focused on right/wrong. All 6s almost constantly demand answers to their questions, and probe and test people and things, noticing contradictions and “problem areas,” but the 6w5 doubles down hard on “that makes no sense.” 6-1 is somewhat rigid. I see these people a lot as taking a side and sticking to it, because it makes sense to them, it roots them in what feels ‘safe.’ You might mistake them for a 5 (and I have…), because they are heavily ‘withdrawn’ through their wing – private, not wanting people to know their business, out of fear of being exploited, spied on, etc. They move toward and need people less than the 6w7, and tend to be ‘loners.’

6w7: are way more extroverted and flashy, funnier, and inclined to move toward people. They are anxiously reactive, with busy brains and a lot of urgency in whatever they are doing, because of the 7’s lack of a desire to wait on what they want. They spin their mental wheels more, avoid hard discussions more, but also want to maintain all their friendships. They move toward people, wanting relationships more than the 6w5. They are also more optimistic, less attached to ironclad systems, and tend to see the pointlessness of everything from a 7 wing sense of humor. They are way more ‘inconsistent’ than 6w5s and feisty from a bratty place of 7 provocation. They trust themselves less, and others more, but ping-pong between trust/distrust and send mixed messages. If they have a 9 fix, especially, there’s constant re-thinking, self-doubting, reconsidering, and re-framing in an attempt to get to ‘the truth’ – there’s no real “anchor.” They are naturally judgmental, but 9 wants them to be less so, so they fluctuate between fierce, strong opinions and keeping their mouth shut to avoid conflict. I’ve especially noticed that 6-9s will avoid anything that scares them or makes them uncomfortable.

6-8: The double reactive is “explosive.” They get angry, defensive, and proactive, identifying people as rivals or adversaries and developing a “get mine” attitude. They lose their tempers and ‘blow up’ easily, but the storm also passes fairly quickly. Very negative people, since 6 and 8 are both focusing on what’s wrong and drawing loud attention to it.

9s: 9w8 is a lot angrier and more stubborn than 9w1; the 9w8 only cares about maintaining its own inner sense of peace (you being upset is not my problem), whereas the 9w1 has fewer boundaries, and more super-ego right/wrong thinking (along with self-berating tendencies – they are hard on themselves in the way 9w8s are not). Their first fix is also going to make a big difference. A 9w8 with a 6 fix has some of that ‘double reactive’ synergy – 8 and 6 both noticing things that piss them off or that might be scary, invasive, or bad, and drawing attention to it. They ‘blow up’ easier than 9w8-5/7 as a result, because fear makes them reactive. Any 9-6 is looking for people to help them take care of the stuff that they don’t know how to do; they are caught between the self-reliance of 9 and the codependency of the 6.

The 9-5 is surprisingly ‘dark’ and morbid, while being double-withdrawn / isolated, and independent in their thinking regardless of MBTI type. They begrudge giving much time or energy to others. Their art/stories tend to be grotesque, due to the often morbid nature of the 5 fix. Their emotions are ‘flat.’ The 9-4 is the opposite—my own peace of mind, combined with melodrama and emotional reactions. They sometimes merge into other people’s problems and make it all about themselves and their feelings, especially if they are an IFP. 9-2 almost seems 2ish in their generosity and attentiveness to others, but there’s still a strong sense of personal inertia and withdrawn energy (being ‘absent’ from relationships for periods of time, then being friendly when they reconnect). They also can’t be mistaken for 2s in that they don’t set the agenda—they wind up getting swept along with what other people want.

The 9-7 seems to struggle the most with finishing things; there’s a lot of creativity there, but not much follow-through. They are restless and want more, so often over-indulgent (big spenders, sometimes deep in debt, because they ‘couldn’t stand to be left out of the fun,’ etc) and frustrated. The double-positivity and re-framing is strong (I heard one say that she always ‘sets herself up for success’); they are less aware of being in danger even when they are, more optimistic, and more trusting than other 9s. The 7 comes through loudly, and forces the 9 to take action more often for ‘fun’ but they are still fundamentally withdrawn/separate from people. Lots of bubby-ness and avoidance of any conflict or sadness. I’ve seen 9-7s literally run away from their problems and refuse to face them for long periods of time.

1s: 1w9 is way, way more intolerant of conflict than the 1w2. They are so heavily 9 that you might mistake them for one, except they have strong, angry views on everything all the time and come across as ‘judgy’ but from a lofty place. They are less forgiving than 1w2s, but also far less likely to push their views off on other people. The 1w2 who sees you abusing her bananas in the checkout counter is going to call you on it; the 1w9 is going to blank out in shock, and not be able to react. 1w9s are also spacey, in my experience, and angry when you point that out to them, because you are criticizing them, and they have enough self-criticism as it is. 1w9s ‘tone police’ quite often—I don’t want to hear about that, shut up; stop fighting at the breakfast table; must you always argue? The passivity of the 9 wing also makes them doing-suppressed. You have the 1, which is already thinking suppressed (reacting from the gut rather than their head), combined with the 9, who is ‘doing’ suppressed. They are often very, very busy and hard-working people, but in terms of doing anything that is going to require conflict... they won’t know what to do. This is even more apparent when 5 is their first fix. Then there’s double withdrawn energy and a lack of proactive assertiveness. The 1w2 is way more people-focused, more likely to draw attention to what’s going wrong, etc., but also more tolerant of mistakes. There’s more super-ego wrapped up in being useful/good, and also more anger when people do not appreciate them. The 1w9 quietly takes care of stuff; the 1w2 expects gratitude. 1-6 brings in some reactive energy—they are upset, and you need to know about it; they are visibly fearful, they have trust issues, etc. Sometimes this shows up in phobias of some sort, since they are already 1ish in their rigid views, and 6 brings in some neurosis.

3s: are all malleable and easy to like, but their first fix makes a LOT of difference, along with their wing. 3w4s are colder and less into people than 3w2s, who have less tolerance for negativity. 3-1s bounce between likability and rigidity (knowing more than you do about everything); 3-9s are less self-aware and more adaptable, non-judgmental, and ‘go with the flow’ when it comes to personal issues. 3-8s are very forceful and go directly after what they want. 3-6 has an obvious undercurrent of anxiety and fear of failure, since 6 is chipping away at their self-confidence.

4s: I’ve only known two of them out of the hundreds of people I have known over the course of my life, but the wing makes a lot of difference. 4w3s are more willing to adapt to other people, more concerned with the image they are projecting, and more aware of aesthetics/presentation. They can be picky and “snotty” and enjoy doing it. 4w5s are a LOT more morbid, withdrawn, and negative. 4-1s have fierce opinions and don’t mind sharing them (I know a 4-1 who fiendishly enjoys writing scathing criticisms of “basic” books on Goodreads; when I said that's not very nice and might hurt the author's feelings, she retorted that if you write a shitty book, someone should call you on it; the criticism is deserved). They are reactive, but also angry, and doubly frustrated when things aren’t ‘good enough.’ I’ve seen them tell people off. 4-9 won’t as easily be confrontational, and is much, much harder to get to know, since there’s no incentive there for them to move toward you. 4-8s are explosive. Reactive and unapologetic in their tantrums (they already hate things as a 4, and as an 8, want to get in your face about it).

I must leave out 5s, since I’ve never known one “for sure.”

7s: there’s a lot of difference on them based on the wing, but also the first fix. 7w8s are rougher, more aggressive, and less concerned with being liked than 7w6s, who show way more overt anxiety. Loud 6-ness comes through in their commitment to their families, in their self-doubt, in how they might poll people for advice, but they are still assertive, self-confident types who rush out and get things done. They are easily bored, regardless of wing. The 7-9s are absolutely INTOLERANT of any kind of conflict. They run away or shut down. They loathe negativity of any kind and avoid it like the plague. I’ve had numerous 7-9s upset with me, because I focus on negativity when talking about the Enneagram, and they want sunshine and rainbows and to feel good about themselves and their loved ones, not to see the flaws. The 7-3s are “shameless.” And I mean that. They are charming, ambitious, torn between doing nothing hard and having fun (avoiding work) and feeling like they NEED to succeed and be impressive. 7-3 can sometimes be cringe in its open bid for praise; it has no shame in drawing attention to itself, especially if they are a 739.

8s: I find 8w9s a hell of a lot easier to get along with than 8w7s, for obvious reasons – it’s the difference between withdrawn energy making them more malleable and the ‘magical thinking’ of the 7 that convinces them that they are always going to land right-side up. The fix also matters. 8-6s are double reactive, and often paranoid about others’ intentions; they will go hard after any threats and be ‘too much to handle.’ 8-5s are more withdrawn and less trusting, but also don’t ‘overreact’ nearly as much as the 8-6 “powder keg.” 8-2s are way more generous than you might think, and often want to do ‘big things’ for people, with a ton of force and energy behind it.

2s: again, wing differences are huge. 2w1s are more judgy, but also more inclined to do the hard work involved in caring for people, whereas 2w3s are flashy and want to be the center of attention. 2-8s are INTENSE. There's a fierce wall behind their generosity that is loud, and they are 'reactive' in an 8 way, especially when protecting their kids/family/friends (nobody messes with my people!), and even more so if there's a 6 involved. 2-1s are double-judgy/opinionated. 2-9s are softer and back off more from excessive intervention, since they can feel people withdrawing from them, and also want to withdraw to some extent themselves -- the 9 drains the 2. 2-6 is anxious to protect their loved ones. 2-7 is double positive, wanting to split their time between caring/loving/being seen and optimism, positivity, fun, and escapism.

Okay! So I’ve recently noticed that I’m slowly allowing myself to use my Se again. For a long time any time I would use my Se things would go very badly, very quickly, so I shoved it into a tiny box in the back of my noggin and started thinking through everything. Everything. No reacting in the moment, always considering the future consequences… which is good, but too much of a good thing! I traded lack of control for total control of any and all actions. (I’ll admit that this got even worse when my shadow Ne would pop up, but that’s besides the point here!)

So I’ve slowly been letting my Se out of its box - and it’s been amazing! Well, as long as I don’t go too far, that is. Checks and balances, yeah?

I’ve been appreciating nature more, doing more physical things, like going for walks. Most importantly, I’ve started appreciating myself more. My wants, my needs, my looks, all of it. I’ve started telling myself that it’s okay to notice myself and to want to be noticed, to want to have nice things, pretty things for myself. To know and feel that I am pretty.

A few weeks ago for example, I’d been thinking about cutting my hair for so long - months, but wouldn’t do it. It was dull and full of split ends and just really unhealthy. Finally I just said screw it, grabbed some scissors, and chopped off half of my hair! After evening up the ends, it turned out to be a really great decision because I felt a million times better. I’ve also started taking the time to just relax and paint my nails or do my makeup, which I never wanted to before. Not that I feel like I need it, because I am now willing to admit that I’m pretty, so I can go without it.

One of the things I commonly explain in MBTI is how one stresses into their inferior function. An inferior function will always be the least mature and least developed function in your stack, and may not even reach the bare minimum of development and maturity until much later in your life.

It’s very easy to identify stress-inferior. Ne-infs know when they’re ideating on all the negative possibilities, Si-infs know when they’re in a stranglehold of their past mistakes, Ti-infs know when they’re constructing a flawed logic, Fi-infs know when their own emotions are overshadowing their logic and the emotions of others, and so on. These are the easy parts to identify. 

What’s not so easy to identify is when we use our inferior functions to decompress. Yep, I said that. One thing we do use our inferior functions to do is relax. And it’s way harder for people to identify when they are using their inferior functions to relax because, in those situations, the use of the function has to come naturally.

Some examples from my own experiences include: Inferior Si (ENxPs: my dad, gigi, and myself) - Si-infs when in a relaxed or content state will reminisce on very specific past experiences, especially in the comfort of others. My dad and I recount very specific events with our family when we have our chill breakfast. I tell very specific stories of my experiences when hanging out with my friends, and so does gigi. Inferior Se (INxJ: bb sis) - My sister is a competitive swimmer. She’s a pretty hardcore athlete, and athletics are a fairly Se thing, where you need to immediately process inputs and react. And she is a fantastic swimmer, so it makes sense that she decompresses with something so physical. Se-infs look for very physical activities that require little intensive planning, and end up in a kind of muscle memory thing for them. Inferior Ti (ExFJ: the domestic) - My partner spends a great deal of time playing card games like Hearthstone and Magic: The Gathering. I find these games incredibly boring for the amount of strategy they require, but he loves them. Ti-infs look for activities that require the same kind of deconstruction and deep understanding that Ti-doms use regularly. Inferior Te (IxFP: vicjr, kay) - My buddy vicjr is huge in old school Runescape, particularly in questing and some repetitive tasks. He had a decently ranked Ironman account, and now he does a lot of tic-manipulation. Kay spends a lot of her free time play Pokemon Shuffle. Both are engaged in activities that are fairly repetitive, objective-based, and have little room for doing things outside of a tried-and-true method. These are the exact activities Te-infs look for when looking to relax. Inferior Ne (ISxJ: julie) - Julie is a writer, and her creative baby is a long fanfiction based on a possibility that could branch off the canon storyline. Not only is the fic an exploration of the events that could happen as a result of going through with a choice in the canon narrative, but it is filled with dozens, if not hundreds, of original characters she created. Ne-infs do not simply create in order to decompress, but they create alternative possibilities and exercise ideation so they can decompress. Inferior Fe (IxTP: alex) - Alex is an introvert of the highest caliber, in his element when he can be alone to think. However, when he wants to relax, he will look to his friends for good company. Despite being introverted, he does desire for easier way to spend time with the people he cares about, and he still make the effort to go out with new friends. Fe-infs decompress by spending time with at least one other person, if not a small group of people, and by having a nice time while they’re with them.

Mind you, these are all conclusions I have come to based on my observations of people I know very well, so they’re not exactly concrete.

Although INFJs more frequently mistype as INFPs or INTJs, it’s not entirely uncommon for an INFJ to mistype as an ISFJ.

This mistyping makes sense. ISFJs have Extroverted Feeling as their auxiliary function and Introverted Thinking as their tertiary function, the same as INFJs. ISFJs make up anywhere from 9-14 percent of the population, so INFJs who are focused on trying to fit in with the status quo or who grew up in sensory-focused environments may be more likely to mistype as ISFJ.

Since Ni is an introverted function, INFJs may appear at first introduction a lot like ISFJs — quiet, people-oriented, calm, and friendly. This is due to their shared first extroverted function, Fe. However, INFJs and ISFJs are different in several major ways — the biggest being dominant intuition vs. dominant sensing.

The dominant function for ISFJs is Introverted Sensing (Si). Si is all about the focus on past experience and holding onto tradition and values. It’s about recalling details from the past and using that knowledge to do things in the ways that they’ve been done before. Guess where Si falls on INFJs functional stack? Last. Because of this, INFJs can become extremely stressed out when having to remember exact sensory details.

For example — an ISFJ and an INFJ work together in a coffee shop. The ISFJ is taught the best way to make a specific drink, and so will make that drink that exact same way every single time. The INFJ, however, will instead remember the general idea of how the drink was made, but won’t be as concerned about measuring out the amount of this or that, and will likely even experiment with the ingredients occasionally. The exception would be if the INFJ felt a lot of pressure to make the drink exactly right, in which case they would focus even more so on doing things as they should be done, which would cause a high level of stress. ISFJs, like other Guardian types, tend to be more task and detail-oriented, whereas INFJs, like other Idealist types, tend to be more idea and big picture-focused.

The dominant function for INFJs is Introverted Intuition. While Si is focused heavily on the past, Ni is focused heavily on the future. Ni looks for symbolism, patterns, and deeper meanings behind ideas and concepts. INFJs are known to speak in metaphors and make connections between both sensory objects and abstract ideas. Ni is the last shadow function for ISFJs, who greatly prefer to focus on concrete past or present-oriented thoughts and ideas.

For example — an ISFJ and an INFJ are looking at the same image of a mother playing with her young daughter. The ISFJ will describe the image for exactly what it is and/or use past experience to describe how it relates to her life — “This is an image of a mom playing with her daughter. It reminds me of when my mother and I used to play together in the park when I was a kid.” The INFJ will instead describe the image in a more abstract way, focusing on what it represents and future implications — “This image represents love and the strong bond between a mother and daughter. No matter how old the daughter gets, she’ll always have these special moments with her mother to remember.”

Both INFJs and ISFJs auxiliary Fe make them types who enjoy helping others, yet they prefer to do so in different ways. ISFJs’ Si-Fe pairing make them excellent caregivers. They prefer to help others by taking care of them. ISFJs make excellent nurses, teachers, and are the quintessential mother type. INFJs’ Ni-Fe pairing make them great counselors. They prefer to help others by helping them understand themselves and offering advice.

Yes everyone is capable of developing every single function but developing shadow functions is usually not healthy. INFJs healthy function stack is Ni, Fe, Ti, and Se. They don’t have Si. Not in their healthy cognitive function stack. The INFJ’s shadow functions that come out when they are stressed in order are Ne, Fi, Te, and Si. Si is last. It is the least developed function and still a shadow function. It is a function that INFJs will find the most draining because it is by far the most unnatural to them and the least used.

But I think we are differing over what Si means which is causing the confusion. While sentimentality is something that lead Si users very often experience it is not the basis of Si. Si is details and memories. The emotional aspect of sentimentality happens when Fe comes into play. An Si and Fe user will see an object of historical value that they size up with their Si as something to be treasured and their Fe will come in and feel sentimental about it. Sentimentality is a feeling. Anyone can have it. The reason Si users have it far more often is because they are constantly comparing old and new things in their minds. Si users think more about the details and little things that will make them sentimental. They get sentimental because of their Si, not the other way around.

Hi, well to me you sound more like an INFJ. ISFJs an INFJs are easily confused because they look a lot like the same, but once you start studying them you’ll find that they’re actually really different. Personally I have an ISFJ friend (I’m an INFJ) and I notice that while we have some things in common, there are a lot of things in which we differ, we percieve life in a extremely different way and we have different goals and expectations for our lives.

Ni traits

Ni is future oriented. Ni looks forward and makes long term plans for the future.

When Ni is presented with a concept, Ni will try to figure out ways to implement that concept in a future plan.

Ni is more abstract.

Ni likes solving problems and decifring codes

Ni is more flexible with rules

Ni will explain something with their own words

Si traits

Si is past oriented. Si looks backward to the past and has the ability to recall things with great precision.

When Si is presented with a concept, Si will try to recall past concepts that remind them the new concept.

Si is more concrete.

Si likes to examine things and notice every single detail of it

Si likes to follow rules just as they are written

Si will explain something just as they learned it,or read it.

Difference between INFJs and ISFJs

The Ni-Fe pull let INFJs recognize when someone is lying, or instinctively know what are someone’s real purposes

The Si-Fe pull let ISFJs remember with great detail what someone exactly said

INFJs inferior Se, will make them be a little bit more risky than the ISFJs

INFJs will prefer talking about ideas (like future plans, or ‘what ifs’) or abstract concepts.

ISFJs will prefer talking about past experiences (the grandmother’s uncle’s cat who died last week) or daily life happenings (yesterday I cooked lasagna)

ISFJs are more aware of their surroundings than INFJs (my ISFJ friend is always telling me that I don’t watch where I walk because I’m always in my head)

ISFJs are more traditional and reserved, INFJs are more innovator and aren’t afraid of change

ISFJs want to look “normal” around others (for exapmle, they would listen the kind of music everyone listens just because it’s what everyone else does). INFJs aren’t afraid to be different around others (they acknowledge their own weirdness so they don’t even try to look like everyone else)

ISFJs are more organized and structured than INFJs 

INFJs look at the big frame more than ISFJs (for example one day I was disscussing with my friend because she said that “everyone is catholic” and I said that it wasn’t true, that there were also crhistians, and atheist, and muslims and many other religions and that catholicism wasn’t the only religion in the world. Then she explained me that she was only refering to her family, not the whole world)

INFJs are better at handling conflict than ISFJs

Stereotypically, the past is the realm of Introverted Sensing. But we know that isn’t true, right…? Hasn’t everybody thought of the past? Hasn’t everybody felt sad about the past, missed things, reminisced…? 

Isn’t that just part of being human? 

I’m pretty sure that it is. 

So how does each type regard the past using their functions then, if they don’t all use Si? 

Well, as Si and Ni are the introverted perceiving functions, you use both of them to process your own personal, subjective experience. This is mostly the past and future, but can also be used in regards to the present moment. 

Si will look at the details of the past, the lessons learnt, the small ways in which they can grow as a person, and the steps they made towards the future, towards whatever their dream life may be. 

Ni wil look at the overall, vague things that the past taught, the feelings and sensations they had during a certain experience, the way something impacted them and their life, and how these things affect their future, in a more general perspective though. 

These two functions are very similar. In fact, they might have almost exactly the same outcome. Neither has a better way of functioning. Si is more practical and tangible, but it can be very complex nonetheless. It is more about remembering important details, whereas Ni is more about remembering vague truths or feelings. (Yes, even if you have a low feeling function). 

Let me give you an example: 

An INxJ and an ISxJ are reminiscing about a time in their childhood when they went to an amusement park. 

For Ni, there is a vague image in their mind where they rush down a slope, and they can remember the glee it brought them. Everything is very bright and vague. They can’t remember who was in the carriage with them, and even if it was a rainy day, their memory paints very sunny, happy weather, as it goes with the emotions associated. 

Another picture in their mind is one of a huge (exaggerated) stick of cotton candy, and them lapping up the pink sugar happily. They can barely remember what it tastes like, but they want to eat cotton candy nonetheless, just because they know it’s good anyways. Everything is bright and sunny in that image as well. They can remember vaguely that their friend was talking to them at the time, but it does not occur to them what their friend looks like, what the subject of conversation was, or where they were. The cotton candy is the subject of the memory, so their brain has helpfully omitted everything else. 

For Si, the image of them rushing down the slope is much clearer. They randomly remember what their friend’s screaming face looked like. The sky is rainy, they can remember that it was very cold and glum weather, but they also remember that it was a lot of fun nonetheless. They remember what the ride they went on was called, who they were with, who they were sitting with on that ride, and the piece of metal that jabbed into their back (Ni just forgot about that completely). 

The picture in which they eat cotton candy is far more complete than Ni’s romanticized visualization. They remember which friend was talking to them, and what they said. It occurs to them that the booth behind them was painted a lovely blue. The cotton candy’s sugary flavour is brought back to them easily. How could they forget something that was so tasty? They would never do that. 

Si is detail-oriented, practical, and useful. 

Ni is vague, makes assumptions, and often completely inaccurate. 

Si will remember almost everything that happened, and have complete ideas. 

Ni will remember what it wants to remember, and actually change its memories to appeal to it more. (This is subconscious, but I can vouch for it).  

Ni is also usually forgetful. A while ago, I was away from home for about two weeks. I forgot what my father looked like. I just couldn’t recall a memory with a powerful enough emotion associated with his face for it to be clear. I could remember things he’d said, but I just could not bring his face into my mind. 

I’m giving Ni a bit more of a negative light here, as too often it is completely romanticized and Si is thought of as petty or stupid. In reality, both have positive and negative aspects. But Ni’s negative aspects are usually disregarded, and Si’s positive one’s too. 

Please realize that all the types will look towards the past! Any type can be “stuck in the past”, conservative, traditional. 

It happens because Ni memories are merged memories and sometimes it’s impossible to unmerge them. At least I’m guilty of sharing a memory and not being sure if it really happened the way I’m telling it.

Should I stop sharing memories because of my inability? Or should I only tell what I’m sure of? In that case nothing would make sense to the listener.

My memory consists of blurred snapshots with captions but people want to hear narratives, so I have to connect the pieces and make it sound like something that really happened.

Last night, I saw a movie. On my way home from cinemas, I was mulling over the movie in my head. I was thinking about how glad I was that there were not many gender roles or stereotypes involved, and there was quite a bit of representation. I was thinking about the impact the movie made, and how it would translate into real life. I was thinking about what I would’ve done in the movie.

But the only scene I could bring into my head was the last scene of the movie. I didn’t feel like I had forgotten anything though, because this is a normal occurrence. It’s just unconscious.

I know an ISTJ who hates watching movies more than once because he always remembers everything that’s happened.

My friends tease me because after a month or two has passed, I can barely remember the plot of a book or movie. That doesn’t mean it was a bad book or movie. I can still remember what my impression of the story and characters were, but the actual story blurs together.

These are just a few examples.

Hm. I do think my memories are somewhat “stylized”, or rather, my internal narration is all Ne-ish, but this could just be detailed recollection… of my exact words of internal monologue (very useful as I can just write that down instead of describing the image in my memory), but then again I tend to recall exactly what I thought, not a “summary”. 

Si is kind of presented as the one that’s faily malleable, but usually whem compared to Se, which would still “write your internal monologues” if it was a prominent function for you, no matter how you store the info. 

That Ni plays a role in memory might explain some things… because even from tertiary to inferior Si, there’s a huge difference. (Me: *mentions thing from childhood* “ENFP mom: Kenny, you have such a good memory!”… but, still puny compared to: ISTJ: “Hey, isn’t that the same lipstick you wore the last time we went to the pizza place?[several months ago; it was not a particularly uncommon shade, and I own alot of them… at least now I know which side of the family my excellent coor vision comes from, makes sense that my eyeballs are from his genes, tho as we are both very near-sighted]”

But then there’s the Ni people in my family (one tertiary, one dominant user (when she comes back from her current student exchange, I must pay attention to how she recounts her adventures ) - none of them spontaneously break out in stories unless someone asked or it’s part of a point, but, I never had any sense that the dom one has less recollections, she never went, “wait, what event are talking about?”, whereas the tert one laments that she doesn’t always know about the events we’re referencing, but, for example, seemed to really like playing Barbies with me but had trouble explaining why/what was so special about it (I assume she liked the storylines I would make up for our dolls?)

I’ve had another NI dom tell me about his life in detail,and, you expect a story to be ‘story-like’ and “summarized” so nothing struck me as odd there, but, in hindsight the emphasis was mostly on his experience - A sense of stagnation at his old workplace, his outrage at how his mom was treated after a family tragedy, annoyance & exasperation at his experiences with his ex girlfriends… He didn’t go into detail like, “She did this and this and this, and each of these things means X and X and Z” like I would, just a general sense of, “Why TF does this person want my constant attention all the time?”

One wonders what this means for the different types, and how they have either of those functions at different strenghts and stack positions. Ovbsly you premarily rely on the one that’s in your stack, and it’s gonna be as accurate as it’s strenght, but how do subconscious components feature in, if they do at all? 

Because, I think I have experienced “summary-like” memory a few times, usually just notions like “That day, a classmate harassed/ bullied me” or, “my father said something insulting”, ie, the type of things you don’t necessarily want to keep consciously filed away. I’d usually not even be aware that I couldn’t repeat the exact insult and circumstances/ assumed I had in “concrete” form until I couldn’t. 

Would an ISXP instead have a flashing image they can’t really associate with anything instead? Would an ISXJ not have any “summary-like” recollections at all? (Not that they would remotely need them as they have everything filed away consciously & ready for immediate retrieval.) This would be worth getting some survey/ data on before we theorize away here. 

In any case it’s clear that Ni does “information accumulation” in some form, like all the introverted functions, but unlike the other ones you can’t necessarily access the “library” even when it’s high on your stack, but, info that you pick up over time is fed into patterns, and used to make simulations, extrapolations or outright predictions. (Which is probably why it woks best when paired with a strong extraverted judging function - You have to just accept the hunch and keep working with it.)

It reminds me of that line in “Lolita” where the narrator speaks of two types of visual memory, one that’s reconstructive, and one that’s an image-image, with the latter being more rare/special, but while they’re vague and fragmentary at times, (I guess now I know how some people recall everyone from their class years after - they must be SJs, or at least sensors of some description) I generally have image-images, not just of my mom or siblings or SOs, but, random teachers, thought it takes a while for both names & images to “stay in” and associate - I can walk right past a person if I’ve only met them one or two times. I remember rooms from houses we’ve lived in (and that I therefore saw every day) right back to my toddler years. 

In any case it’s clear that Ni does “information accumulation” in some form, like all the introverted functions, but unlike the other ones you can’t necessarily access the “library” even when it’s high on your stack, but, info that you pick up over time is fed into patterns, and used to make simulations, extrapolations or outright predictions. (Which is probably why it woks best when paired with a strong extraverted judging function - You have to just accept the hunch and keep working with it.)

I didn’t even think of that myself, so thanks for the input, @kendrixtermina. 

As for your questions. 

So Ni stores the memories as generalization/points/tabels (you know, basic intuition information storage) and then reconstructs them in the “mental holodeck”, whereas Si stores actual images, (organized by context & personal significance)?

I like the “mental holodeck” bit. I think it’s pretty correct, but I ought to note that Ni-users do store images too, they simply tend to be a lot more vague, blurred and lacking in detail. Other than that, it’s pretty spot-on. Si’s memory may be more or less visual though. The most important bit is the details vs vague generalisations. Whether those are in the form of images or not in your mind is relevant, but not essential to your function. 

Would an ISXP instead have a flashing image they can’t really associate with anything instead? Would an ISXJ not have any “summary-like” recollections at all? (Not that they would remotely need them as they have everything filed away consciously & ready for immediate retrieval.) This would be worth getting some survey/ data on before we theorize away here.

ISxPs may have flashing images like that, but it depends on how developed their functions are. If they’re in a loop, definitely. If they have well-developed Ni, probably. If they lack Ni, probably not. An ISxJ would definitely have “summary-like” recollections as well, but they’d generally be more detailed than an Ni-user’s would be. I don’t know if they really have everything filed away consciously and ready for immediate retrieval though. That sounds pretty extreme to me. Maybe if their Si is very well-developed and healthy, that would be the case, but for most ISxJs, well, they’re not geniuses with amazing memories either. They’re still just human beings. 

We definitely ought to make a survey and collect data, but I don’t think my blog is popular enough to be able to do that yet. :( If some other blogs are interested in partaking in this, message me, please, and maybe we can make a long, thorough survey for all this. 

— thoughts of an INFJ  (via the-anomalous-infj)

Yes. And whenever I meet someone from the past, someone who used to know a former version of me, I somehow always slip into my former self. Like, around them, I behave the way I behaved when they used to know me and not the way I would behave today. And I hate myself for it. I feel like, as long as people see me as a mystery, I can flourish and slowly become a better and a greater person. But people who used to know me, or know me, are the ones holding me back. And this time of standing still without being able to move forward, scares me.

(via notanotherinfjblog)

ENFJ- Buys lots of guidebooks. Someone who trusts others’ advice and goes to exactly what the guidebook tells them is the best.

ENFP- Gets lost in a crowd. Someone who would inevitably drag one pal and run off towards something “cool” they saw, only to get both them and their friend lost.

ENTJ- Needs to be in control. Someone who tries to manage everything that’s going on and gives vendors who pull you over dirty looks.

ENTP- The fun one who provides an air of spontaneity. Someone who would suddenly decide to change an activity or run through the streets.

ESFJ- Checks that everyone is happy. The typical mom of the group who over packs just in case one or two or ten of their friends needs a toothbrush, toothpaste, floss, etc.

ESFP- Gets distracted by small vendor shops. Someone who has to look at everything and enjoys doing things and being there 24/7.

ESTJ- Has all the maps and herds everyone in the right direction. Someone who micromanages things, but ultimately gets everyone where they need to be.

ESTP- Doesn’t mind physical activity. Someone who would find a hiking trail or physical activity to do a trip.

INFJ- Needs constant breaks. Someone who would bring along a book for some peace and quiet after a long, hectic day.

INFP- Would want to stop at cute cafes hidden in alleyways. Someone who would want to find “hidden gems” in a city and stay in a hostel.

INTJ- Thoroughly researches the city just in case some sort of natural disaster happens. Someone who can take over if the ESTJ/ISTJ gets confused, and will emerge unscathed.

INTP- Use the experiences to broaden their mind. Someone who would be interested by the different types of technology in a foreign country.

ISFJ- Caught up in buying souvenirs. Someone who buys souvenirs for all their friends because “This one reminded me of you!”

ISFP- Reads all about food. Someone who would choose the food and take photos of every dish before eating.

ISTJ- Similar to the ESTJ. Makes sure everyone is where they need to be. The Dad of the friend group, ready to tackle any problems the group faces and problem solve.

SUBMITTED by rainismyfavouritecolour

This is a personal, very recent discovery that I’m indeed INFJ. It took me a very long time to understand, but now that I’m finally here, I want to share this with you.

Maybe you’ve been told you don’t look like an INFJ. Maybe you can’t fully identify with hunches or always being right. You might have read a ton of Ni vs Ne descriptions and found the Ni one always more accurate, but were too filled with self doubt to really go with it.

There’s no surefire method I can tell you will work for you, other than continuous study of the functions and yourself. But maybe some of what I’ve written will help you identify yourself better. This is my very subjective experience only, but I’m sharing it in hopes that this will help at least some of you.

— O —

On Ni:

I get hunches. Constantly. And I go with them so fast, I don’t even notice. It’s an immediate reaction, a bolt of lightning hitting me from above. The reason I didn’t realize it before was because I was much more insecure and self doubting. I didn’t pay enough attention to this happening, nor did I trust it. Instead of implicitly trusting myself, I constantly analyzed and questioned, wondered if I was wrong - running around in constant circles. But tuning into myself a bit more, I caught it. I took it for so granted and natural before, I didn’t see what was meant by ‘hunches’.

I don’t think about it, in fact, I will usually be elsewhere with my thoughts or preoccupied with something completely different, and suddenly the solution to some thing I’d been worrying about appears (provided I have enough/correct info). That’s Ni.

I easily see parallels and similarities between things that may not appear similar at all. That sounds Ne but you need to pay attention to what your mind does with all the impressions you take in. If they converge, that’s Ni. If they diverge, that’s Ne. See, when I draw parallels, separate entities become essentially the same thing. They carry the same meaning, become a symbol for the same thing. Ne would likely assign two (or several) different meanings to a single object instead.

Another thing is that it’s stated pretty much everywhere that Ni is always right. That’s false. Ni THINKS it’s right. It doesn’t have to be. That’s an important distinction to make. Ni’s accuracy largely depends how much accurate information is available. The more there is, the more likely it will be that Ni actually will be right. The less information is considered, the more likely it is that Ni will completely miss the mark.

So, coupled with how insecure I was, how was that stereotype anything I could much identify with at all? I’m very well aware I could be wrong, even believe I will be, because that’s what the majority of my life taught me to believe. It’s really hard to trust yourself if you’ve got no self belief. If you don’t know how to.

So, some advice for insecure Ni-doms, or really anyone - work on trusting yourself, on self belief. Take a step back and stop questioning/analyzing. It’ll become clearer in time and your confidence will grow.

On Fe:

I display a number of behavioral characteristics that are both Fi and Fe. That made it difficult to identify with either over the other. What decided it for me though, was how I process emotion. Of course, Feeling functions aren’t primarily about emotion but that’s an important part not to be overlooked. I use Extroverted Feeling simply because I don’t process emotion internally. I can’t. I need to, ideally, talk them out to truly understand what I’m feeling, the exact nuances of it, why I’m feeling it etc. I share them naturally, openly, one of the few things about me that actually are external. I’m vaguely aware of my feelings, when I have them, but trying to figure it out in my head is headache inducing. I simply don’t work that way. Writing my feelings out works as well, but there seems to be something in the act of sharing or hearing it verbalized that makes it a better solution than just writing.

Fi, introverted Feeling, cannot do this so easily. It feels everything much more internally, and sharing emotion is extremely uncomfortable, impossible even. This is a very clear distinction I can see between real life Fi vs Fe users, more easily in high Feeling types. Fe will tell you exactly what they’re feeling, raw and in the moment. Fi will do that indirectly by hurling insults or accusing you of things. Emotion is obvious in both but one is direct and to the point, while the other is less so.

If I talk about my feelings, they see it as whining about my problems. They don’t see that this is how I process and identify my feelings and problems in the first place. To them, it’s an unnecessary and tedious thing to do.

Now, Fe values are about making sure other people are comfortable first while Fi is about making themselves comfortable first. The reason I use Fe is because of how natural and easy it is for me to look out for how people feel/may feel. That’s not because I value being kind and considerate. It’s instinctive. It just happens.

An example of this is how I react to criticism. I don’t wonder if it’s true or how I feel about it, but panic about how to best adjust my behavior to remedy whatever the criticism was about. I adjust myself to make the other person more comfortable. For example, my family once remarked on how odd it was that I continuously, naturally explained my reasoning behind doing certain things (thanks to one of Charity’s posts I realized that was Fe - sharing ‘emotions’ openly). I’ve grown up in a pure Fi family. No Fe whatsoever. So, doing that was perceived as me being defensive which never even occurred to me. Taking this as an unconscious command of 'don’t do it, it’s making me uncomfortable’, I did away with that. I still want to do it and often catch myself in the middle of it - but wanting to maintain outer harmony is so unconscious, it’s like breathing air. You don’t pay attention or aren’t even aware but it’s still happening.

This kind of stuff has been influencing me so much, I blended in with my Fi family. I now superficially appear like a Fi user despite not being one. Often, I’m told I look like an IXFP. My empathy is so high and unconscious, I take on the attitudes and emotions of others and don’t even realize it until slapped in the face with it. I’m just learning that I’ve adopted a lot that way. The differences only become apparent if you know me (and MBTI) well enough. I’m simply unable to do anything without considering what consequences this may have on someone else.

Now, I’m not the stereotypical host. I’m not particularly warm or fuzzy unless you know me well. That’s because my brand of Fe doesn’t care primarily whether you’re physically comfortable, something that probably has to do with with low Se, but if you’re okay emotionally. That you feel safe and comfortable, unjudged and not rushed. That you feel understood. I want to make sure you’re feeling good. I instinctively wait for others to 'give permission’ before proceeding, all because of this unconscious need to be considerate, even if I really want to do it. Like turning on the AC when it’s hot. My sister and mother just go for it while I always either ask if it’s okay with them and wait until they say yes, or silently consider whether one of them has a cold or whatnot, if the AC will make them feel worse. If they object, I don’t do it.

Additionally, my 'values’ change and expand constantly. Sure, I’ve got a few that are pretty set, but generally, if you can make me understand, it becomes adopted into my world view and values. Live and let live, for example, is a pretty Fi value. Fe is about collective values which is why 'live and let live’ can be bypassed in favor of 'the greater good’. The individual can be ignored as long as the majority are taken care of. I remember my sister telling me how intolerant I was being by not going by 'live and let live’ - now, it’s a natural part of how I think. I can’t even pinpoint when it became part of me, but it did.

On Ti:

Aah, Ti. How I love and loathe thee. Truth be told, I’ve probably been stuck in a Ni-Ti loop for a really, really long time. I still am in one. To keep it short and simple -

Ti needs to understand something before it can apply it/is taken in. It takes apart a thing into its single elements, examines each one from all angles until fully understood, and by the end can put the whole thing back together any way it wishes. It continually adjusts itself with each piece of incoming information, making sure its always consistent with its inner logic. Ti asks 'does this make sense to me?’

I have never been able to apply any concept until I fully understood it, going by exactly that process.

On Se:

The ultimate blind spot. I get lost embarrassingly easy to the point of getting anxiety attacks. My body coordination is complete crap. I continuously run into walls or door frames (it gets worse the more I try concentrating on how to avoid it). I cannot react right away but need time to process. Try to force me and I become catatonic, unresponsive. I slow down and come to a standstill, a mental stutter and state of paralysis.

I’m wary of physical intimacy to the extreme. I’m quite disconnected from my body or the physical world. The line between my thoughts, imagination and reality is blurred and very easily questioned. But solitary exercise or walks are amazing. They make me quiet my mind until I’m left with nothing but pure physical sensations and the inner peace and calm it fills me with.

— O —

I hope this has been at least a little bit helpful.

I want to thank Charity for her amazing explanations, her infinite patience with putting up with so many of my (sometimes really stupid) questions, and finally for letting me post this.