Ru1ned-s0ul

A month ago he was dicking around while on a series of some..very odd jobs. At the time he was confused as hell, now it's just hilarious to think about- soon as he was done, he ran straight to Kerry to tell him about the weirdest day he had. "Damn, that's recent." He hummed, odd to think about how they just got their new body while he was off doing his own thing.

At the sight of the rockerboy's reassuring smile, Conan relaxed and smiled back at them. He gets what they mean, he's an artist himself- usually he just makes vent art instead of talking about it, it's easier. But that isn't the only thing he does, he had design the cover art of his input's most recent album. Kerry asked him after he told him that he designed the art on the back of his jacket himself, after he had seen it. "I hear you, usually I just draw instead of saying.. It's easier that way." Conan told them, then nodded at their next words.

They tried to be conscious of looking at Conan when they talked, but there were a few moments they slipped; it was a habit to talk while they worked after all, so used to needing to be on coms while diving. Quickly though, the equipment was all put away; bizz easily hefting the large floor projector as though it was a hollow prop. They'd of course let Conan help if he wished, but it wasn't necessary. Waving a farewell to the owner - they worked out a payment system which avoided handoffs at shows - Bizz motioned for Conan to follow them out.

A decent ways down the street in the direction that brought them closer to the waterfront near downtown, their eyes would glow. "I'd rather talk on holo; if you're cool with me bein in your head for a little while. At least till I find the coordinates I'm meant to be meeting my ride at." When they were sure he was alright with it, Conan would see the warning that someone was trying to breach him; and eventually a screen with the netspace Bizz was seeing inside his head showing up where a holocall would. Bizz's avatar - a thin preteen looking child with messy red hair and big green datascreen goggles - waved at him and began to speak in his mind.

"There, that's better. Interesting place you got here." They grinned, sitting cross legged. "Right, so. Guess it works out best if I just go in order. Something like 4 months or so ago I got called in to be a part of a team sent to klep a set of files from the Firestarters in Pacifica." Conan would have heard about the gang, moving into territory that was lost by the voodoo boys and possibly having ties to Militech. "Job paid really well and I didn't have anything better to do; just pulled myself out of a really really long dive session and promised myself I'd try to be a person for a little while. So, I go. Even get a piece of tech from Netwatch to help find the shit were meant to be running off with." Pixel eyes rolled dramatically on the goggles as they sighed. "Job goes sideways, Fais jumps off a fucking crane into a moving AV and fistfights the occupants cause they were shooting at me and Gil - fun fact neither of us can shoot for shit apparently, but Fais can. he just didn't for whatever reason - and the other half of the team decided to make a fire bomb in a napalm factory; but we got the files and got paid."

They shrugged, shaking their head. "And we just kinda kept doing it. Goldshot would invite us to the Afterlife, buy us drinks, and give us wicked dangerous jobs that paid amazingly. Says he's getting us into war profiteering. Lost a few crew members over the months. Happens. I don't pay much attention, at this point I've started performing and I got friends now so whatever, right?" They shook their head. "Ended up on the run from Netwatch; found shit I wasn't supposed to behind the Blackwall on a side gig. Yeah, I never said I was smart. Either way, after hiding out in Alaska with Fais' family for a while; we come back and end up in a warehouse with Goldshot and his people. Except they aren't a fixer and his team. They're FIA. This was last month."

Conan watched as Biz worked, helping whenever they needed it. he's used to people looking away from him even knowing his troubles with hearing- so it doesn't bother him that much. He had moved to help them with the projector but then backed off with wide eyes when they managed to do it on their own, it's a little scary how strong the Rockerboy really is.. they'll easier be able to pick him up- he doesn't know what to do with that thought. while his own chrome made him stronger, he is likely not as strong as them because he didn't undergo full body conversion like they did. He decides to let them do it, since apparently they didn't need their help- following close behind as they walked.

He nodded at their question, a bit grateful that they asked instead of just doing it. Conan blinks at the sight of biz's avatar, after the hack was done loading. huh, he wasn't expecting that- well..he didn't know what he was expecting, but their words made him smile. He Listens as they speak, he has heard of the fire starters before- though hasn't run into them yet, since he hasn't really spent a lot of time in Pacifica. Jumping off a crane onto a moving Av? Fistfighting? A firebomb in a Napalm factory? He has done some Gonk shit himself but their team is on a whole 'nother level of it.

Then their next words got him practically sputtering and trying to cobble up some kind of thought, which was- "Thank you?" He said, blush dusting his cheeks as he looked away. in all honesty he actually doesn't mind the flirting, different from how Kerry flirted with him..that's for sure. And that surprises him, that he actually enjoyed it- he and Kerry did talk about letting someone else into their relationship once or twice, but between them both being busy and Conan's.. issues, they haven't really opened up conversation again because of it but the option was always there.

He looked back at them once he got his bearings back. "really? Tell me more." Conan asked, bumping bizz's shoulder with his own to hopefully get them to spill the detes. The curiosity is eating at him, but he won't push. "Don't have to tell me though" he said, letting them know that the option to opt out is there. Conan watches as they swung their toxically bright drink, it looks like they realized that they flirted with someone who's taken. "Never thought of that option before, I definitely could." He said, letting that topic go.. for now. "Bring my dog with me and just hang out with her till the show is over, could also keep an eye out for any threats too.." and there he goes again with not letting himself relax and enjoy things, he always has to be acting like he's in an operation. It makes Kerry exasperated every time, and he has to remind him that he's not on a gig- sometimes he wishes that he could switch his brain off from Soldier Mode.. But alas, he can't.

"really? I didn't know that, was it because of stage fright or.." The full body conversion thing..that part he didn't say out loud, didn't want to push them if they weren't ready to say it. So he responds to what the Rockerboy said next, "yeah, that one- it reminds me of the moment during the war that I realized that all my choices didn't amount to nothing, I was.. 15 I think?" Conan said, shrugging as he stares off distantly. "Got lent over to NUSA, somehow managed to pass an adult. Only one soldier knew the truth, accidentally told him one time." He chuckled at the positive memories he had of the guy.

"He was horrified, I Had to beg him not to tell anyone. Now I wish I didn't- I wouldn't have seen the things i saw. Nor witnessing him getting killed while we were in the basilisk we were assigned to, felt the moment he died.. then I managed to pull myself out, but not without losing my leg to the explosion right as I jumped off of it." He sighed before shaking his head, the searing pain he felt after the shock left him was excruciating. Suddenly he twitched at the feeling of the phantom hanging over his shoulder, "remember how it felt when you had your first kill?" it said. Oh Conan will never forget it- it haunts him, he remembers how sick it made him feel. He was told that he should be proud, but all it did was make him feel empty. "Then I realized, laying in that cot- that all the lies and false promises they were feeding me were bullshit, all of it. Every. Single. One." He was practically Growling at this point, but he stopped himself. He breathed through the anger and pushed the hurt back. He didn't want to lose it, not here, not now.

"got it replaced then they sent me off again, they kept me out of it because I kept freaking out every time they tried putting me back in. Bit the shit outta my superior once, he was pissed but it was satisfying since I never liked the guy." He grinned at that memory, he has no regrets- it was absolutely deserved and he knows everyone else thought it. "And now I am here." Finally ending the yap session, and opting to leave the rest secret. He already said enough, the alcohol had probably loosened him up enough to start spilling his guts again. Ugh, he's begun to sound like Silverhand with all the pointless ranting- it irritates him every time he sees himself acting like him, he does not want to be that asshole.

"Stage fright. Just more comfortable in netspace in general. Kinda feels like I'm always jacked in now so it's less bad." They would chuckle a little, smiling. "Only had this body for about a month." Listening to him recount the memories that resonated with the song, Bizz just nodded along. They didn't get it entierly, they hadn't been to war yet; but they did understand the feeling of being lied to and left fully changed as a result. They wanted to reach out and touch him when he began to get growly; but they settled for an attempt at a comforting smile while he calmed himself.

"No, don't worry about it. Sometimes you just have to get something out. It's why I sing, honestly." They chuckled softly at the little bump, looking down into their nearly empty drink. "So…that song actually has something to do with what I said about Arasaka." They drained the rest of the glass and turned to face Conan properly. "Probably shouldn't talk about it around so many ears though. What I can say is that NUSA has a lot invested in weakening both Saka and Militech. So much that they're letting me and my team throw the whole deffense budget at anything we think will help."

A month ago he was dicking around while on a series of some..very odd jobs. At the time he was confused as hell, now it's just hilarious to think about- soon as he was done, he ran straight to Kerry to tell him about the weirdest day he had. "Damn, that's recent." He hummed, odd to think about how they just got their new body while he was off doing his own thing.

At the sight of the rockerboy's reassuring smile, Conan relaxed and smiled back at them. He gets what they mean, he's an artist himself- usually he just makes vent art instead of talking about it, it's easier. But that isn't the only thing he does, he had design the cover art of his input's most recent album. Kerry asked him after he told him that he designed the art on the back of his jacket himself, after he had seen it. "I hear you, usually I just draw instead of saying.. It's easier that way." Conan told them, then nodded at their next words.

Conan nodded at them, then took a swing from his beer. "I'm in a similar situation, most of my body is now chrome but not completely.. thankfully" he said, looking down at his beer somberly. He isn't sure if he wants to talk about this but.. Vik did say that it's always good to speak about it, and bizz's situation is similar- Being that they are both people who're heavily chromed up, and in the other's case, they had undergone the full conversion. "It was.. something that I didn't want to happen, but I didn't really have much of a choice- I was owned." He sighed, then took another swing. It's hard talking about it, let alone think about it but with the alcohol beginning to flow through him it makes things easier. "I would say I was born into the corp, but it isn't the right word." He laughed bitterly, his hand clenched around the can and caused it to make a squeaking sound. "Made more like, created as an experimental weapon with the DNA of a man that died decades ago- i keep seeing arasaka everywhere I go, and I hate it." The moment conan named the corp, he shuts up. There is a reason he doesn't like talking about his past and issues, once he starts.. he doesn't stop until he realizes that he said too much. Damn it, he hopes that no one else heard- and that bizz wouldn't rat his ass out to them.

But there's no reason to deny it, he does hate seeing arasaka everywhere he looks and owns..even his damn gun is arasaka made- though he went and modified it enough that it's now his own.. and the whispers are starting up again, great. It always happens when he becomes emotional, it's distracting. He looks back to the Rockerboy sitting next to him, already reading the words on their lips as they spoke- he is thankful that they changed the subject, so he can pretend he didn't accidentally say too much about his past than he had intended to.

"both." he replied, which is true- he did go here for both the concert and the bar, he had his sights on it for a while now. He has been thinking of taking Kerry to it at some point but.. they were both too busy for it at the time. "I was planning on checking this place out at some point, then saw that you had a concert so.. yeah." Conan said, running his hand through his hand through his hair before giving them a sheepish grin. "Never went to a concert actually- despite having a rockerboy for an input, I didn't have the time to go to his concerts.. and well, I had only just started getting better with crowds." He doesn't have the words for how much he loves that man, it was a twist of fate that led to them meeting and getting together- he still wonders how it even happened. He's smiling stupidly as he thinks of him, forgetting for a moment that he is in the middle of a conversation. Internally, he notes that the whispers quieted when he started thinking of Kerry. Interesting.

Then their next words got him practically sputtering and trying to cobble up some kind of thought, which was- "Thank you?" He said, blush dusting his cheeks as he looked away. in all honesty he actually doesn't mind the flirting, different from how Kerry flirted with him..that's for sure. And that surprises him, that he actually enjoyed it- he and Kerry did talk about letting someone else into their relationship once or twice, but between them both being busy and Conan's.. issues, they haven't really opened up conversation again because of it but the option was always there.

He looked back at them once he got his bearings back. "really? Tell me more." Conan asked, bumping bizz's shoulder with his own to hopefully get them to spill the detes. The curiosity is eating at him, but he won't push. "Don't have to tell me though" he said, letting them know that the option to opt out is there. Conan watches as they swung their toxically bright drink, it looks like they realized that they flirted with someone who's taken. "Never thought of that option before, I definitely could." He said, letting that topic go.. for now. "Bring my dog with me and just hang out with her till the show is over, could also keep an eye out for any threats too.." and there he goes again with not letting himself relax and enjoy things, he always has to be acting like he's in an operation. It makes Kerry exasperated every time, and he has to remind him that he's not on a gig- sometimes he wishes that he could switch his brain off from Soldier Mode.. But alas, he can't.

"really? I didn't know that, was it because of stage fright or.." The full body conversion thing..that part he didn't say out loud, didn't want to push them if they weren't ready to say it. So he responds to what the Rockerboy said next, "yeah, that one- it reminds me of the moment during the war that I realized that all my choices didn't amount to nothing, I was.. 15 I think?" Conan said, shrugging as he stares off distantly. "Got lent over to NUSA, somehow managed to pass an adult. Only one soldier knew the truth, accidentally told him one time." He chuckled at the positive memories he had of the guy.

"He was horrified, I Had to beg him not to tell anyone. Now I wish I didn't- I wouldn't have seen the things i saw. Nor witnessing him getting killed while we were in the basilisk we were assigned to, felt the moment he died.. then I managed to pull myself out, but not without losing my leg to the explosion right as I jumped off of it." He sighed before shaking his head, the searing pain he felt after the shock left him was excruciating. Suddenly he twitched at the feeling of the phantom hanging over his shoulder, "remember how it felt when you had your first kill?" it said. Oh Conan will never forget it- it haunts him, he remembers how sick it made him feel. He was told that he should be proud, but all it did was make him feel empty. "Then I realized, laying in that cot- that all the lies and false promises they were feeding me were bullshit, all of it. Every. Single. One." He was practically Growling at this point, but he stopped himself. He breathed through the anger and pushed the hurt back. He didn't want to lose it, not here, not now.

"got it replaced then they sent me off again, they kept me out of it because I kept freaking out every time they tried putting me back in. Bit the shit outta my superior once, he was pissed but it was satisfying since I never liked the guy." He grinned at that memory, he has no regrets- it was absolutely deserved and he knows everyone else thought it. "And now I am here." Finally ending the yap session, and opting to leave the rest secret. He already said enough, the alcohol had probably loosened him up enough to start spilling his guts again. Ugh, he's begun to sound like Silverhand with all the pointless ranting- it irritates him every time he sees himself acting like him, he does not want to be that asshole.

"it was loud enough that even with my ears being one foot in the grave, I was able to hear it." He replied, giving them a smirk before nodding at their offering. Conan gave himself a moment before pushing himself off the wall, and following the rockerboy to the bar. A sharp inhale escaped him, then a relieved exhale followed a second later when he sat down next to them- already feeling the pain ebbing away as he relaxed in his seat.. Man, it is the best feeling after standing for so long.

Watching as the bartender leaves then returns with their drinks, the quiet man gives the bartender a near silent "thanks" after he places the beer down. Then the guy had bounced off to someone else after giving Biz their drink. Conan picks his up, taking a sip before putting it down before glancing at their drink.. then having a double take- because it looks like it's on another level of toxic. when they say "pick your poison" he doesn't think they meant THIS. He is both baffled and impressed that they are able to consume it, he'd never be able to stomach it.

"how are you able to drink that?" He suddenly blurted out, then said a quiet "sorry" when he realized what he said. Oops, he did not mean to say it out loud- He hopes that he didn't sound mean. "Er.. I did enjoy the show." he said, fumbling as he tried to change the subject after that embarrassing moment. He looks away, his left leg bouncing as he tries to think of what else to say. He fails- small talk is not his strong suit, he's better when it leads to a single goal, such as fishing for information for a gig.

"Don't worry about it; I think it actually is toxic, honestly." They shrugged, waving it around a little with a smirk. "But I don't have any organs so I don't get anything out of it but the taste, and it sure does taste good." They took another long drink before explaining further. "Full Body Conversion; mostly for netrunning purposes but once you've got a vocal implant like this why not use it for fun and profit?"

They debated talking about the why of the procedure; that they needed a body without a real nervous system that could withstand blackwall diving regularly, that they still hadn't fully finished paying it off and were still sort of owned by NUSA. But that was a lot to lay on what amounted to a stranger. Of course they were shit at lying so if he asked they might just tell him anyway. They noticed that the man seemed to be a little distracted by something, and it seemed to be an unwelcome distraction. That just wouldn't do.

Conan nodded at them, then took a swing from his beer. "I'm in a similar situation, most of my body is now chrome but not completely.. thankfully" he said, looking down at his beer somberly. He isn't sure if he wants to talk about this but.. Vik did say that it's always good to speak about it, and bizz's situation is similar- Being that they are both people who're heavily chromed up, and in the other's case, they had undergone the full conversion. "It was.. something that I didn't want to happen, but I didn't really have much of a choice- I was owned." He sighed, then took another swing. It's hard talking about it, let alone think about it but with the alcohol beginning to flow through him it makes things easier. "I would say I was born into the corp, but it isn't the right word." He laughed bitterly, his hand clenched around the can and caused it to make a squeaking sound. "Made more like, created as an experimental weapon with the DNA of a man that died decades ago- i keep seeing arasaka everywhere I go, and I hate it." The moment conan named the corp, he shuts up. There is a reason he doesn't like talking about his past and issues, once he starts.. he doesn't stop until he realizes that he said too much. Damn it, he hopes that no one else heard- and that bizz wouldn't rat his ass out to them.

But there's no reason to deny it, he does hate seeing arasaka everywhere he looks and owns..even his damn gun is arasaka made- though he went and modified it enough that it's now his own.. and the whispers are starting up again, great. It always happens when he becomes emotional, it's distracting. He looks back to the Rockerboy sitting next to him, already reading the words on their lips as they spoke- he is thankful that they changed the subject, so he can pretend he didn't accidentally say too much about his past than he had intended to.

"both." he replied, which is true- he did go here for both the concert and the bar, he had his sights on it for a while now. He has been thinking of taking Kerry to it at some point but.. they were both too busy for it at the time. "I was planning on checking this place out at some point, then saw that you had a concert so.. yeah." Conan said, running his hand through his hand through his hair before giving them a sheepish grin. "Never went to a concert actually- despite having a rockerboy for an input, I didn't have the time to go to his concerts.. and well, I had only just started getting better with crowds." He doesn't have the words for how much he loves that man, it was a twist of fate that led to them meeting and getting together- he still wonders how it even happened. He's smiling stupidly as he thinks of him, forgetting for a moment that he is in the middle of a conversation. Internally, he notes that the whispers quieted when he started thinking of Kerry. Interesting.

especially whatever they had said while they fiddled with the wiring, and he can't even lip read because of the way they have their head turned. So he definitely did not catch most of it.. he'll have to ask later. Conan casually observes bizz as they get up and jump onto the speaker, now he can actually see their face and be able to understand what they said. He chuckled, once he processed what was said after a moment of staring. "Conan, and you didn't" he said, taking the hand that was offered and shaking it. "Er.. what did you say before? My ears are a little.." he paused, taking a moment to motion towards his head. "Fucked, to say the least. I can't hear well." He continued, he's used to it at this point but it doesn't mean that it can get a bit irritating to keep on asking people to repeat and STILL not being able to understand what was said- for both him and the other person he's speaking to.

Leaning his back against the wall, he crossed his arms as he got comfortable.. it was partially to put less pressure on his aching leg, the one that had been once blown off- leading to arasaka's docs to take his *other* leg so he can have two new and improved legs. Doesn't mean that the damaged nerves from the blast were fixed, that was for cutting costs. They ended up leaving him with phantom pain since they decided they didn't want to deal with it.. luckily it isn't as bad as his left arm, which aches most of the time. Though he is able to put it into the background, unless it's a bad day- either way it's something that's constant..

"You didn't miss anything honestly, just me proving I shouldn't be allowed to talk to people when I'm not on stage." The light in their cheeks grew a bit brighter. "Mostly trying to figure out if you were here for the bar or for me and if you actually enjoyed the show. Knowing your ears are shot though, probably a gonk question huh?" They did eventually notice him shifting, catch the little expressions of discomfort. That wouldn't do.

"it was loud enough that even with my ears being one foot in the grave, I was able to hear it." He replied, giving them a smirk before nodding at their offering. Conan gave himself a moment before pushing himself off the wall, and following the rockerboy to the bar. A sharp inhale escaped him, then a relieved exhale followed a second later when he sat down next to them- already feeling the pain ebbing away as he relaxed in his seat.. Man, it is the best feeling after standing for so long.

Watching as the bartender leaves then returns with their drinks, the quiet man gives the bartender a near silent "thanks" after he places the beer down. Then the guy had bounced off to someone else after giving Biz their drink. Conan picks his up, taking a sip before putting it down before glancing at their drink.. then having a double take- because it looks like it's on another level of toxic. when they say "pick your poison" he doesn't think they meant THIS. He is both baffled and impressed that they are able to consume it, he'd never be able to stomach it.

"how are you able to drink that?" He suddenly blurted out, then said a quiet "sorry" when he realized what he said. Oops, he did not mean to say it out loud- He hopes that he didn't sound mean. "Er.. I did enjoy the show." he said, fumbling as he tried to change the subject after that embarrassing moment. He looks away, his left leg bouncing as he tries to think of what else to say. He fails- small talk is not his strong suit, he's better when it leads to a single goal, such as fishing for information for a gig.

To anyone that sees him, he appears to be just another stiff NUSA Ex-soldier- which they are somewhat right- since during the unification war He was gifted to the NUSA by arasaka in an attempt to gain their favour and hopefully be let back into the Americas.. obviously it was successful, judging by their presence 10 years later. To others, he appears to look like a certain dead man when he was in his 20s.. but most would pass it off as him purposefully sculpted himself to look like the man that bombed the original arasaka tower, others would just think it was a coincidence. Plus, if they did notice they probably were old as shit or they had somehow managed to find an old photo of Johnny...

They are incredibly close to the truth- he IS that man.. at least, in the way a clone is to their genetic template. He was made, not born. Arasaka used the genetics of silverhand, but due to them missing parts of his DNA- they replaced the missing genes with other genes they had on hand. And because of it, there are subtle differences between the two of them. Such as him having natural blonde hair, unlike the raven black color his predecessor had. He was considered a partial failure because of it, as well as the fact that he's trans and hes not cis like silverhand- luckily it doesn't bother him.. at least the trans part that is. his dysphoria bothered him constantly, luckily arasaka was oh so kind to provide him with hormone implates and surgeries to correct what had made him the most uncomfortable.. but it was not out of the goodness of their hearts, they just wanted their child soldier to be focused and not bothered by a human body that didn't fit what he saw himself as.

Despite all these gifts, he hated the corp with his entire being. He didn't ask to exist, and they didn't even bother with giving him a proper childhood- they just educated him on strategies and then trained him as if he was a robot.. later practically turning him into one with how much they chromed him up, now he heavily struggles with seeing himself as human- it's hard to himself as a person, let alone anything other than a machine. The "best" part? Their docs didn't even do their jobs correctly! they messed up badly enough that they left him with chronic pain when they gave him the silver arm- and an intense fear of going under again. they didn't check if they got the dosage right, nor if he was actually unconscious and not appearing to be under.

They tried to stamp out his individuality, to prevent him from becoming his own person and breaking free from their programming. But despite it all, he still manages to develop his own personality, likes and dislikes- different from the long dead man before him. he had also secretly given himself his own name- "Conan", it was his own brand of freedom and rebellion from oppression they placed upon him..

His thirst for freedom is the reason why he decided to escape two years ago, it was successful but not without leaving him some scars to prove it. A ripper named Vik managed to find and save him, After that he had striked out on his own once he got back on his feet, but he still goes back to the man when he needs his services ever since he paid his debt- having already started to see him as a father, since he never had one nor saw any of his fellow soldiers or the arasaka scientists as a parent. He still pops into the clinic sometimes, whether to catch up or needing his comfort from his distress of just existing and neverending nightmares in the Dreamworld.

Conan bobbed his head to the music, causing his once fully dyed black hair, now overgrown with his natural blonde to move with him- luckily he has tied it up in a bun to keep out of the way, since having long hair can be a pain in an ass. This specific song resonates with him, hits a deep part of him that still sings in pain and soothes it over, allowing him to settle- if only for the moment. He had been constantly listening to this specific song ever since he discovered it, though when he has his hearing implants off it's mostly for the vibrations.. Sure if he has the volume up enough he can actually hear it without them, sometimes he just likes to keep it low so he can feel the beat instead.

especially whatever they had said while they fiddled with the wiring, and he can't even lip read because of the way they have their head turned. So he definitely did not catch most of it.. he'll have to ask later. Conan casually observes bizz as they get up and jump onto the speaker, now he can actually see their face and be able to understand what they said. He chuckled, once he processed what was said after a moment of staring. "Conan, and you didn't" he said, taking the hand that was offered and shaking it. "Er.. what did you say before? My ears are a little.." he paused, taking a moment to motion towards his head. "Fucked, to say the least. I can't hear well." He continued, he's used to it at this point but it doesn't mean that it can get a bit irritating to keep on asking people to repeat and STILL not being able to understand what was said- for both him and the other person he's speaking to.

Leaning his back against the wall, he crossed his arms as he got comfortable.. it was partially to put less pressure on his aching leg, the one that had been once blown off- leading to arasaka's docs to take his *other* leg so he can have two new and improved legs. Doesn't mean that the damaged nerves from the blast were fixed, that was for cutting costs. They ended up leaving him with phantom pain since they decided they didn't want to deal with it.. luckily it isn't as bad as his left arm, which aches most of the time. Though he is able to put it into the background, unless it's a bad day- either way it's something that's constant..

Your blades are sharpened with precision Flashing your favorite point of view I know you're waiting in the distance Just like you always do Just like you always do Already pulling me in Already under my skin And I know exactly how this ends I let you cut me open, just to watch me bleed Gave up who I am for who you wanted me to be Don't know why I'm hoping for what I won't receive Falling for the promise of the emptiness machine

You wouldn't be able to tell they were on the end of an hour long set; the amount of energy in their performance. Endurance was one of the many perks of an FBC; so long as one could handle the shock of radical brain surgery. Not that it was a visible thing, how much chrome Bizz had, they sacrificed a lot for a good sculpt to go over their Wiseman.

Going around like a revolver It's been decided how we lose 'Cause there's a fire under the altar I keep on lying to I keep on lying to Already pulling me in Already under my skin And I know exactly how this ends I let you cut me open, just to watch me bleed Gave up who I am for who you wanted me to be Don't know why I'm hoping for what I won't receive Falling for the promise of the emptiness machine

They never talked about this song whenever they were asked about it; it wasn't worth the follow up questions. How does someone so vehemently pro freedom contract their body to NUSA? It was a lot more complicated than that, but they weren't famous enough for anyone to hear them out over it. So they just sang their heart out and told people it was about capitalism and greed. Their old team knew and that was enough.

I only wanted to be part of something I only wanted to be part of, part of I only wanted to be part of something I only wanted to be part of, part of I only wanted to be part of something I only wanted to be part

Through the bridge of the song they grew more intense with each loop, seeming to hang onto the mic stand for stability; before finally flinging it against the wall behind the stage as they screamed out the chorus. Good thing they were a solo act.

I let you cut me open, just to watch me bleed Gave up who I am for who you wanted me to be Don't know why I'm hoping, so fucking naïve Falling for the promise of the emptiness machine The emptiness machine I only wanted to be part of something The emptiness machine I only wanted to be part of The emptiness machine

To anyone that sees him, he appears to be just another stiff NUSA Ex-soldier- which they are somewhat right- since during the unification war He was gifted to the NUSA by arasaka in an attempt to gain their favour and hopefully be let back into the Americas.. obviously it was successful, judging by their presence 10 years later. To others, he appears to look like a certain dead man when he was in his 20s.. but most would pass it off as him purposefully sculpted himself to look like the man that bombed the original arasaka tower, others would just think it was a coincidence. Plus, if they did notice they probably were old as shit or they had somehow managed to find an old photo of Johnny...

They are incredibly close to the truth- he IS that man.. at least, in the way a clone is to their genetic template. He was made, not born. Arasaka used the genetics of silverhand, but due to them missing parts of his DNA- they replaced the missing genes with other genes they had on hand. And because of it, there are subtle differences between the two of them. Such as him having natural blonde hair, unlike the raven black color his predecessor had. He was considered a partial failure because of it, as well as the fact that he's trans and hes not cis like silverhand- luckily it doesn't bother him.. at least the trans part that is. his dysphoria bothered him constantly, luckily arasaka was oh so kind to provide him with hormone implates and surgeries to correct what had made him the most uncomfortable.. but it was not out of the goodness of their hearts, they just wanted their child soldier to be focused and not bothered by a human body that didn't fit what he saw himself as.

Despite all these gifts, he hated the corp with his entire being. He didn't ask to exist, and they didn't even bother with giving him a proper childhood- they just educated him on strategies and then trained him as if he was a robot.. later practically turning him into one with how much they chromed him up, now he heavily struggles with seeing himself as human- it's hard to himself as a person, let alone anything other than a machine. The "best" part? Their docs didn't even do their jobs correctly! they messed up badly enough that they left him with chronic pain when they gave him the silver arm- and an intense fear of going under again. they didn't check if they got the dosage right, nor if he was actually unconscious and not appearing to be under.

They tried to stamp out his individuality, to prevent him from becoming his own person and breaking free from their programming. But despite it all, he still manages to develop his own personality, likes and dislikes- different from the long dead man before him. he had also secretly given himself his own name- "Conan", it was his own brand of freedom and rebellion from oppression they placed upon him..

His thirst for freedom is the reason why he decided to escape two years ago, it was successful but not without leaving him some scars to prove it. A ripper named Vik managed to find and save him, After that he had striked out on his own once he got back on his feet, but he still goes back to the man when he needs his services ever since he paid his debt- having already started to see him as a father, since he never had one nor saw any of his fellow soldiers or the arasaka scientists as a parent. He still pops into the clinic sometimes, whether to catch up or needing his comfort from his distress of just existing and neverending nightmares in the Dreamworld.

Conan bobbed his head to the music, causing his once fully dyed black hair, now overgrown with his natural blonde to move with him- luckily he has tied it up in a bun to keep out of the way, since having long hair can be a pain in an ass. This specific song resonates with him, hits a deep part of him that still sings in pain and soothes it over, allowing him to settle- if only for the moment. He had been constantly listening to this specific song ever since he discovered it, though when he has his hearing implants off it's mostly for the vibrations.. Sure if he has the volume up enough he can actually hear it without them, sometimes he just likes to keep it low so he can feel the beat instead.