The Perils Of Being In 3d

“Do you know what it’s like to be told how lucky you are to be someone’s prisoner?”

The worse it gets, the easier it is for me to completely dismiss Theon’s death as non-canon.

In the show my ideal situation is that he and Sansa would have gotten married* and he would have stayed with her as kind of a consort while she ruled Winterfell/ The North as its Warden.

*Them getting married in all honesty would be politically stupid though in some sense, since they couldn’t produce heirs to Winterfell but on the other hand Theon is the one highborn man in all of Westeros who might have been happy to stay at Winterfell and let Sansa rule.

I don’t think Theon ever wanted to rule and be king exactly…Though I 100% think he thought it was what he wanted in season 2. I think what Theon always wanted was to be respected and loved and feel like he belonged somewhere…And he never gets that.

The show makes it clear that in the end, he belonged at Winterfell. I don’t agree with all the logic the show worked with to solve his arc, but I think it’s fair to say that in the end, Winterfell was where he wanted to be, at least in that moment.

As for the Iron Islands, there is no doubt in my mind that his sister, Yara is the better ruler. Theon isn’t a good ruler, his super power is profoundly bad decision making. The fact that he takes only one bucket of arrows to fight a literal infinite army of undead was the most Theon thing Theon did in season 8. He literally makes a bad choice 9/10 times and it is so profoundly magical. A joke I like to make is that his A CLASH OF KING’s ARC is called: How to completely ruin your life in 7 chapters or less, because he DESTROYS EVERYTHING. Yara on the other hand has her shit together.

But also it’s not like he couldn’t have visited either place at any time though the distance between the two is not insignificant it’s not impossible to travel from one place to another. Pyke and Winterfell were both his home and he could have spent his time between the two, as long as the two were at peace and I don’t see why they wouldn’t be with Yara and Sansa in charge since they care about their people’s welfare and not glory for glory’s sake.

To be honest his options were wide open. There was a lot he could have done with his life. He could have trained people with a bow, he could have ridden horses, he could have learned to at least partially overcome his aversion to intimacy and to believe his life was more than redemption to anyone other than himself. The Starks forgave him but he never forgave himself and he died believing he was a failure when he wasn’t…That’s the worst way to go, IMO.

Also SOMEONE should have told him on screen about Ramsay dying but the whole point of this is that David and Dan are stupid fucks… If he dies in the books I just hope it’s better. But he doesn’t need to die so…Why not let him live?

In my alternate universe though he definitely married Sansa and the wedding was beautiful and they both are like “fuck it” and she rules Winterfell and if they end up without a blood Stark heir from Bran or Arya or some arrangement with Sansa getting pregnant, they raise someone up as Sansa’s successor who she believes will continue the work of taking care of her people…You know, like they did in real life…

TLDR: Sansa and Theon marry, Sansa rules The North, Yara Greyjoy rules the Iron Islands and Theon learns to live for himself and not for redemption alone. It would have been a braver ending then him just dying.

THEY WERE PERFECT, GDI. 

He is a good man