OH GOD OH PLEASE NO!

You can lie when you name things

trans bears are literally stronger than any US marine

How on earth would they be able to tell that a bear is trans. I’m not saying they can’t be but how would they communicate that.

:/

this is so fucking funny

we the jury find the defendant not guilty your honor

In like 1998 my very femme lesbian friend went to Pride in London and was all excited at the “teddy bears picnic” happening in one of the city parks. She took along a picnic hamper and her cuddly teddy bear. Needless to say, the large hairy gay men all thought she was adorable and she had a great time

i love bald women

let's replace veterans day with bald women day

fellatio sounds like a supporting shakespeare character rather than oral sex on a penis to be honest

they want you to make fried rice

who is "they"

the wok left

how am I supposed to make fried rice if the wok left

skillet issue

my camel straight up told me "man i am not carrying another fucking straw" like wtf asshole its just one straw whats your fucking issue

the world's smallest carnivore is called the "least weasel" 😭😭 i'm dying but like if it's the smallest carnivore then it sure is the least amount of weasel you can have 😭😭😭

Immediately I love him

@karcinogen you

@rivsquiv PLEASE look at himb

holds him gentle..........

i love "coyote time" as a phrase. I wish it was time for coyotoes all of the time.

tomorrow im developing my theory of tuesday

it's already tuesday

just as i theorized.

i had a dream where tornadoes were made illegal or something i just remember like a dozen police cars driving directly toward a tornado with their sirens on and all getting sucked into the tornado

World Heritage Post

“indeed, it seems that the Pacific Northwest (Twilight) is a common locale for finding vampires and werewolves at a high school” oh my god

Can't wait to run across this drama summarised in a three hour video essay

"i've got no qualms about it" meanwhile i'm over here making qualm chowder

we all have the homie that's a cautionary tale

had

If I was a tree, I would use my mycelium network to spread lies for clout

its kind of fun to uninstall programs you arent using to free up space and see them all beg for their lives