i collect minds.

im a simple man i like when things are shaped like other things. stool shaped like a mushroom. pillows shaped like fruit. salt and pepper shaker shaped like two friends hugging. in my ideal world i will have a house stocked entirely with novelty objects shaped like other objects and it will be beautiful.

i tend to avoid discourse because most of it is trite and pointless but just this once i feel like i need to state my opinion: i think everyone should bend to my dark and evil will

Need one more to unlock the door

Mommy's going to take you out of the freezer and leave you in a room temperature environment, ok? Awww you're already dripping condensation... There's a puddle gathering at your base, my leaky little condensation slut.

can you put that on a coaster

No. I want her to see all her little circle stains on the table...

okay thats cute and all but this table was my grandmother's so i would really appreciate it if you could stop and actually consider other peoples belongings for 2 fucking seconds

But both Mommy and my little condensation slut gave our condensent so like I feel like I shouldn't have to ask for yours... I guess I could get like a new table or whatever but it's just not the same if it isn't mahogany.

okay red what the fuck do you mean "condesent"