commission archive [2020]

ok but light gay as shit I would have gone crazy

ok but light gay as shit I would have gone crazy

when i was in 3rd grade there was this girl named sydney who was really nice but everyone thought she was weird cause she was obsessed with horses and were kinda mean to her but anyways she let me borrow her aragon books an i could only read like 5 pages of that shit cause it was so boring, and she was like, i know you didnt read my aragon book, i mirror watched you last night and since then ive been absolutely fucking terrified

same year we had a zoo field trip, she and her mom offered to take me so i felt like i had to repay her so  i stole a fuck ton of snacks from everyones lunches while they were feeding the elephants then i asked her mom if we could eat in the canopy zone away from everyone else and i gave them all the snacks & her mom was like “are you a mischievous spirit that my daughter has befriended ??” i was like no im a third grader … right after that they moved. i think its my fault

They probably watch you occasionally to this day

she fucking better she said she would protect me from imps

Nobody tell me what anime this is bc I don’t care but this looks disgusting where’s the flavor

“You know it from anime and manga,” bitch isn’t Beef Stroganoff a Russian dish

I just realized that they don’t even make the corkscrew noodles-

power move: make a d&d character with the same name as your dm

#but with ‘cool’ in front of it

Yeah this is my character Cool José. He’s like normal José except he didn’t fail his driving test three Times.

Fun family story: when my aunt was marrying her wife everyone was really excited but also dreading it because my aunt is known for her insanely long speeches so everyone knew her vows would be like 9 hours long so when it came time for her to say her vows she had a shit ton of cue cards in her hands and even her wife started groaning and my aunt took a deep inhale and then unravelled all the cue cards which were taped together and they all just read ‘HOT DAMN’ in giant letters and those were my aunts vows.

my sense of humor: getting birthday cards with the wildly incorrect age on it for people