Apples Fall From Trees

We love and we want only the best for you.

Motives that push or pull

What drew you to the Practice?

As an apple falls from a tree,

What guides the paths taken?

Viewing the threads running through choices taken,

What pulled you from there to here?

Celebrating life and ancestors and existence. This day I think of my maternal side of the family. Catholic, from New Mexico, and pretty strange (and estranged). They were all pretty estranged to begin with, but an aging grandmother pushed the whole lot over the edge (my aunts and uncles anyway - they didn't have far to go). I stayed sane of course. Now doing my part in breaking dysfunctional cycles and keeping connected to ancestors.

That's my abuelo and bisabuelos in the pic above. I think the women below are great aunties. Never that close to any of them but met them or knew them. Our family were the wanderers. The grandparents wandered and even some of the great grandparents. And most all of them considering many of them came over from Europe or wherever. I don't know for sure at what point my European ancestors met my Native ancestors.

I suspect much of my estrangement from the family here in New Mexico is in great part due to my grandmother's distaste for most of them, and in turn my nearness to her I would imagine. She didn't seem to like many of them at all, and one of my favorite phases when I would relate some piece of family history (I'm really into roots and family genealogy and getting to know family) to her was, "What good has being a Baca ever done me?" I guess by extension I could say the very same thing.

Those are my great, great grandparents and family above and below is my great grandmother. I of course never met my great, great grandparents, but I did know my great grandmother. I always loved to get to visit with her. Our last visit was here in Pojoaque a couple of yeas before she died.  

Although my grandmother had soured my interest in family for a while, I am coming back around and looking to ancestors and family as an inspiration and with gratitude for getting us to the place we are now. Just imagine all that transpired over all those years just to get us to where we are right now. The urge to life and to better things. Celebrating Life!

Numbers keep ticking up . . . 

Interactive freak out https://hub.jhu.edu/2020/01/23/coronavirus-outbreak-mapping-tool-649-em1-art1-dtd-health/

On trips back home like today, I'd used to call my grandma

from @returntonature  -  Self awareness is healing,

Self awareness is growth.

It’s easy to critique or judge others,

But can we look deeply at ourselves?

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Can we truly admit to ourselves, and how our childhood wounds get projected onto our current experiences. How we don’t always see what is true because of these early wounds. We get into cycles which project the wounding onto others. All of our unmet emotional needs distort how we can be empathetic, compassionate, and supportive to others growth and self reflection. No one is perfect, and everyone is growing.

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Can we truly make space for that work? With the same softness that we wish for. Or do we run, blame, or shame others when our shadows are revealed. The choice is ours to make. Every decision is tender. A matrix of choices. New standards are birthing.

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Every day is a new chance to look within. Every day is a new chance to grow.

Every day the world is asking for our inner work, so that we can make the necessary changes for the good of the earth and our human experience.

Break the chains, every day.

I believe in you,

I believe in your good.

I believe in your healing.

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It is our time to surrender to love and compassion.

To new ways of connecting and relating. Listening to each other’s wounds and strength through those wounds with safe space.

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What does safe space to shed feel like to you?

(Pic and wisdom by @nayyirah.waheed )  -  https://www.instagram.com/p/BslO8ASFTWP/

@Regrann from @happiphantom https://www.instagram.com/p/BsQuWVeHNX9/ - Great text that explains the scientific evidence and biology of #intergenerational #historicaltrauma via #epigenetics, #traumapsychology and constellation mapping of #familytrauma to facilitate #healing.  There are #traumaspecialists  and #medicinepeople throughout the 4-corners that can support one through this journey as well.  In health, Rosa —————————————

“This groundbreaking work on generational trauma educates, comforts, and empowers individuals from all walks of life to both identify and disassociate from traumas that were passed down from previous generations.

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Based on a mix of experiences and scientific evidence, Wolynn clearly and verifiably demonstrates the impact of generational trauma, down to the way it changes the expression of a particular gene.

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Pulling on a mix of epigenetics and trauma psychology, he provides both a primer on the ancestral transmission of trauma and its symptoms and a method to recognize and deal with the lingering aftereffects. His liberal use of personal anecdotes, client testimony, and tangible examples balances the somewhat cerebral topic in a masterful way, providing an accessible and easy to understand resource for both the casual reader and the practitioner; however, the tone, style, and delivery make this an ideal tool for those seeking freedom from trauma in all its

forms. •

Wandering

Uprootedness

Disconnection

Assimilation

Hypocrisy

Are important to

My family

My culture

The time is coming

A quick call reveals the same discussions

No big changes

Bracing for the existential reeling and days or weeks of reflection

Family of origin does not disappoint

Bracing for the fodder no more

There is enough here for days or weeks of reflection

Probably lifetimes

It's unfolding now

Family of origin and uncertainty of how real that is

Can we be related?

Existential reeling

Usually it's about being tired of living alone

Although this call might be different

It isn't

Not really

Rather be dead as usual

Family of origin and uncertainty