Hey everybody, i'm running this blog to share my knowledge about DIDOSDD and disprove the evil mean Endos who love infesting system spaces.
About me...
I'm a physically disabled 18 year old. I also am a system with DID, and really enjoy talking about my systemhood and disproving randos on the internet. I use he/him pronouns and that will likely stay consistent throughout this blog. I'm a college student majoring in Optical Engineering (although i'm not dead set on it). Feel free to ask questions and i'll answer at my leisure!
Before you ask....
No, i'm not a trained nor qualified professional. I'm just a student who loves to do his reading. Don't take my words as gospel, and i'll try and cite as many sources as I can. I'm not even a psych student!
DNI...
I want to encourage endogenics to interact with my space. I love asking questions, answering questions, and more. So respectful endogenics, you're here to stay. Don't consider this my support however. I'd love to have respectful debates and conversations.
HOWEVER, if under any circumstances you try and bring some nasty bullshit over to my page, please fuck off. This is a place of positivity where we uphold scientific fact and truth, so please bring some decorum, and i'll have decorum in turn.
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maybe endos could want / need trauma holders for . . the trauma they may have ??? what kinda question is that lmao
the point of trauma-holders is to insure memory fragmentation, not to "deal with trauma".
"Memory fragmentation occurs to protect the brain from the trauma it endures and is the brainβs way of trying to heal." (Kylie Hamacher, 2026.) (feel free to dm me for my source on this if you can't find it!! XD)
some parts might be more tolerant of healing with access to it, but trauma-holders literally develop from the severe trauma that traumagenic systems go through. they develop as a means to shut-off those memories to ensure functional life for the system. watering down trauma-holders to just "oh we remember things" is inherently ableist to systems who have suffered so much.
Endogenic is a broad term, with several different identities falling under it. What would you suggest people call themselves if they believe in one kind of endogenic system, but not another?/gen
(A person who believes in tulpamancy but not born systems, for example. Or who believes in born systems but not created systems.)
Hi there! This is a phenomenal ask.
So for one, I did not know in the Endogenic community there was different levels of acceptance. I find this ask phenomenal just because I learned about that, so thank you for showing me the way here.
Now, i'm just going to assume this pertains to a comment I just made recently about how you either believe that Endogenics do exist... or they don't. There is no maybe. And this I stand by. There is no picking and choosing between what is valid and what is not in the endogenic community, because in the end it all boils down to traumagenic or non-traumagenic.
In the context of Tulpamancy, I need to mention that Tulpamancy is a highly misinterpreted practice in the Plural community. It is not actually what most people say it is here. Tulpamancy is a closed practice done where you create a separate altered consciousness through meditation. That altered consciousness is STILL YOU. You still only have one ANP and one EP. That division is a lot more hazy than you'd really think it is. A Tulpa cannot take control of your body, nor can it be considered entirely separate from you.
So in all honesty... I don't know what to call that. The only division however is traumagenic vs non-traumagenic, and there's little nuance past then.
In medical literature, the main question in regards to types of endogenic plurality is whether somebody can know who/what they are when they were born, if you can know your own psychological state at birth.
^This continues into a bigger discussion about how the human self is naturally multiple instead of being a unified self, as theorised by many, many researchers. Polypsychism, the Multiple Selves theory, Id and Ego, etc.
Community-wise, the main question in regards to types of endogenic plurality would be if created plurals exist or not. Fortunately, medical literature has answered this already.
There's also the question of, what counts as traumagenic and what doesn't. For example, many antis lump non-disordered traumagenic systems, and disordered traumagenic systems with spiritual beliefs, in with endogenic systems.
And there's also the question of, does the non-traumagenic multiplicity recognised across various cultures count? Where many antis discuss how somebody being part of a different culture means they can't choose the terms they identify with.
We recommend this book for explaining a medical recognition of endogenic systems.
This is besides the main point here, though.
Tulpamancy is, 1; not a closed practice, and 2; not part of the culture people claim it's from.
This has been noted by historians, as well as by people who are part of the culture others claim Tulpamancy is from (Tibetan Buddhism)
Tibetan Buddhism also isn't a closed practice to begin with. Some high-level practices prefer you to be a formally inducted member. But the Dalai Lama encourages the sharing of practices, as it's a big part of what Buddhism itself is about. Nobody owns these practices.
It can be culturally appropriated, which is important to know, especially with the real-world issues Tibetan Buddhists are facing, like being driven out of their homes. But claiming Tulpamancy is an appropriation is both historically inaccurate, and dismissive of Tibetan Buddhists. If you want to call it anything, the best is cultural appreciation, or sharing of culture.
Your explanation of what Tulpamancy itself is, isn't accurate either. An important mention here is that there are brain scans on Tulpamancers, supporting the idea that they are not the same consciousness.
Tulpas being able to take control over the body, or possess it, has been acknowledged multiple times.
And this is a more accurate description of Tulpamancy.
As a small side note, the authors of The Haunted Self, the current Theory of Structural Dissociation, have made it as clear as they possibly can that their theory doesn't apply to everyone. It's intended to cover only trauma-related dissociation, not any other dissociation or other forms of multiplicity. ANPs and EPs occur in trauma-related, structural dissociation. They don't have to occur in experiences outside of that.
We're happy to provide further sources/resources if wanted
I'm going to take the time to respond to this when I can fully review your papers ^^ Thank you so much for sharing this information with me, i'm just smack dab in the middle of moving cross country and didn't expect massive amounts of literature to read. Let me take the time and do my research and do your thoughts justice instead of just brushing it off. This is on my to-do list to review so, please give me a few days!!! Tysm!
For many of us, Plurality is a debilitating, life altering symptom.
So boiling down the endogenic belief down to just a "stance" is harming traumagenic systems to begin with. It's completely disregarding the pain and suffering that Traumagenic systems have gone through to get to this point, which is not only ignorant but completely disrespectful.
anti endos love showing that their discourse stance is rooted in self pity. its not about you. let me hold your hand and say this again. its not about you. you claim your opinion is rooted in science but then all your discourse points loop back to how it hurts your feelings.
Well this is really funny.
First of all; this space is here for respectful discussion friend! I'm not sure why being respectful is so hard, so please don't interact if you're gonna bring bs onto my page.
Second of all....
This isn't the only discourse point i've mentioned on my page ^^ I'm allowed to discuss how it stigmatizes the community without including literally every point on why Endos aren't entirely real. I've literally mentioned before the Theory of Structural Dissociation, so please look at that post on my blog if you're curious to hear a science backed point
so quick to break my dni...
ps. ad hominem is an immediate loss if you don't know.
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endo bs is so stupid, bah is fucking stupid, no sweetheart im not going to make you an alter based off of a character you like so you can "will" it in. it's especially funny when they request a trauma-holder or something.. like dude... for what???
With the widely accepted Theory of Structural Dissociation, plurality is caused by amnesiac barriers between identity states. Otherwise these identity states fuse together around the ages of 9. There is not a single explanation for non-traumagenic plurality that makes sense in a clinical way. Separation has to be caused by SOMETHING, otherwise all our little pre-existing identity facets fuse together...
So my genuine question is why is it more desire able to create more division and barriers in your mind. There HAS to be something separating those identity states, and that's amnesia. So why do you want more of it?
Endogenic is a broad term, with several different identities falling under it. What would you suggest people call themselves if they believe in one kind of endogenic system, but not another?/gen
(A person who believes in tulpamancy but not born systems, for example. Or who believes in born systems but not created systems.)
Hi there! This is a phenomenal ask.
So for one, I did not know in the Endogenic community there was different levels of acceptance. I find this ask phenomenal just because I learned about that, so thank you for showing me the way here.
Now, i'm just going to assume this pertains to a comment I just made recently about how you either believe that Endogenics do exist... or they don't. There is no maybe. And this I stand by. There is no picking and choosing between what is valid and what is not in the endogenic community, because in the end it all boils down to traumagenic or non-traumagenic.
In the context of Tulpamancy, I need to mention that Tulpamancy is a highly misinterpreted practice in the Plural community. It is not actually what most people say it is here. Tulpamancy is a closed practice done where you create a separate altered consciousness through meditation. That altered consciousness is STILL YOU. You still only have one ANP and one EP. That division is a lot more hazy than you'd really think it is. A Tulpa cannot take control of your body, nor can it be considered entirely separate from you.
So in all honesty... I don't know what to call that. The only division however is traumagenic vs non-traumagenic, and there's little nuance past then.
While I agree that Endogenics are living, breathing people... I think it boils down to more of a nuance than that.
When we mention being anti-endogenic, it's not just a "Stance" on a specific topic. This is the issue with most Endogenics, as they refuse to acknowledge plurality as more than just a stance to us.
For many of us, Plurality is a debilitating, life altering symptom.
So boiling down the endogenic belief down to just a "stance" is harming traumagenic systems to begin with. It's completely disregarding the pain and suffering that Traumagenic systems have gone through to get to this point, which is not only ignorant but completely disrespectful.
So no, we're not hating on you because of your thoughts on a "Stance"
We're hating because you believe an integral part of our torture and trauma is on the same level as deciding pineapple on pizza.
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Thank you so much for the kind words! I really think the best way to understand people is to have open, non-judgmental discussion with one another! Plus; i'm personally trying to listen to Endogenics for my own personal pleasure, as I find genuine enjoyment in discussing experiences that are not my own. After all, you can't change someone's mind by screaming at them.
I have faith in the Endos of tumblr that we can have decent discussion with some decorum... but then again this is genuinely my first time on tumblr... so who knows how this is gonna go! Here's to hoping!
Theory of Structural Dissociation & Why EPs/ANPs aren't always system related...
The Theory of Structural Dissociation is the most commonly accepted model of what happens when, in layman's terms, someone is traumatized in one way or another. When talking about The Theory Of Structural Dissociation (Onno van der Hart, Ellert R. S. Nijenhuis, and Kathy Steele), we can think about Structural Dissociation in layers.
1. Primary Structural Dissociation
Primary Structural Dissociation includes PTSD and Acute Stress Disorder. These two disorders have a simple split of ONE ANP (Apparently Normal Part) and ONE EP (Emotional Part).. more on that later. This type of dissociation is oftentimes caused by events that happen later in life, and are non repetitive. This usually causes flashbacks and other related issues, because the EP is stuck reliving that traumatic event.
2. Secondary Structural Dissociation
This layer encompasses Complex-Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Borderline Personality Disorder. This is categorized by ONE ANP (Apparently Normal Part) and MULTIPLE EPs (Emotional Parts). This is likely caused by repetitive trauma, but not enough to cause severe fragmentation. This causes multiple defensive trauma-based habits to form, which oftentimes cause issues with identity and daily life.
3. Tertiary Structural Dissociation
This is recognized as the most severe form of Structured Dissociation, encompassing DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder). This is caused by repeated, severe traumatic events in early childhood (before the age of 9), which causes amnesiac barriers to form around pre-existing identity facets, leading to severe fragmentation. This is categorized by MULTIPLE ANPs (Apparently Normal Parts) and MULTIPLE EPs (Emotional Parts). This causes issues with functioning in daily life due to severe amnesia, and identity problems.
What is an ANP?
An ANP, or Apparently Normal Part, is the part of us that handles daily life. It's the part that drives your car, files your taxes, works your job. And for many people, (non traumatized people...), ANPs and EPs are very cohesive with one another. They work together to manage life. This creates a solid state of identity, which allows you to feel like... well YOU!
What is an EP?
An EP, or Emotional Part, on the other hand is the part that handles traumatic memories and emotions pertaining to a traumatic event. When traumatic events happen, the ANP gets split up from an EP. So the ANP will handle the daily life, while the EP remains traumatized.
So Yosuke... Why does the Second level have multiple EP's, but is not a system?
I'm glad you asked! This is because of two simple little differentiations between the two... The severity of the trauma, and the reaction to the trauma. In early childhood, all of our minds (yes, EVERYONES) were already in multiple different facets (or pieces, however you want to phrase it). These facets may have been dedicated to sadness, or happiness, or hunger, anger, fear, etc. When severe and repeated trauma disrupts daily life for a young individual, the facets begin a survival tactic. The mind builds a wall of amnesia around an affected facet, in order to stop the traumatic repercussions from spreading and bothering other facets. This is a survival mechanism. It splits up both ANPs and EPs alike, which causes them to eventually develop their own identity, leading to Dissociative Identity Disorder or Other Specified Dissociative Disorder.
In Secondary Structural Dissociation, the affected person maintains a cohesive ANP. And most of the time, they also do not develop the same amnesia barriers between EPs and ANPs. (More on why I say MOST later...) This is what differentiates between the Secondary and Tertiary Structural Dissociation Level.
The entire reason Tertiary Structural Dissociation maintains separate identity states (aka Alters, Parts, Headmates, whatever you want to call them) is because of the amnesia between the identity states. Eventually after these amnesiac walls are put up, they develop their own identities as the person grows. This does not happen most of the time in Secondary Structural Dissociation.
Why haven't you gone in depth on OSDD yet???
Great question. I've held off on mentioning OSDD, or Other Specified Dissociative Disorder for a VERY specific reason, and that OSDD is considered a "catch-all" term for those who may experience profound dissociative symptoms, but don't meet the full criteria for DID. It falls under the Second Structural Dissociation category, but can really be considered the 2.5th layer. (Which I know is weird, let me explain...)
OSDD 1A
OSDD 1A is a subtype of OSDD, or Other Specified Dissociative Disorder. This is categorized by ONE ANP and MULTIPLE EPs, but does experience the same amnesiac barriers as DID. (Remember when I mentioned this is weird to categorize?) These EPs may be less distinct, and can sometimes be considered as different "modes" rather than full fledged Alters.
OSDD 1B
OSDD 1B is really the 2.5th layer of Dissociation (Not factual, just layman's terms.) It is also categorized in the Secondary Structural Dissociation category, while maintaining ONE ANP and MULTIPLE EPs. This subset also has similar amnesiac barriers and distinct alters to DID, however the key difference being they are oftentimes lacking the severe amnesia between Alters. So, more amnesia than 1A, less than full DID.
And that is EPs and ANPs explained in The Theory of Structural Dissociation! Yosuke out!
