Always Happy To Be Here

-One Year Later-

Mingyu could already tell that ChaeChaeGo was bustling as he approached the front entrance by how lively the inside sounded. He slung his bag over his shoulder, pushing through the front door and immediately being hit with a steam coming from the kitchen and the bustling commotion of hungry patrons.

Eunchae was first to spot him, grinning. “Mingyu-Oppa!” She beamed. “How are you?”

Mingyu swung his bag at his feet by the first table that was open, smiling back at the waitress. “Exhausted. College is no joke, especially in the summer.”

She exhaled. “I don’t know how you’ve been doing with summer classes. My break is almost over, and I’m dreading going back.” She pointed. Mingyu chuckled. “Want the usual?”

“Yeah, sure,” he nodded, and Eunchae headed to the back. Mingyu brushed his hair back, acknowledging a few familiar patrons and with a grin and small talk about the same thing: college. 

With the rush, it took a bit longer to get the food out, but Mingyu could smell his marinated pork belly the second it rounded the corner onto the floor. He hummed, turning his head just as it was placed in front of him.

“Here you go.”

“That took forever, you know.” Mingyu teased, glancing up. He smirked as a familiar set of wide brown eyes looked down at him, running a hand through his growing cherry red hair. 

“Take it up with the chef, not me.” Mingyu smiled.

“Hi, Hyung.”

Joshua crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at Mingyu. “How was class?” 

“Fine. How’s work?”

“Mmm, fine.” He said. He glanced around the room. “I’m waiting for my favorite customer to come in.”

“Mmm, not here yet?” He asked. Joshua shook his head, a playful pout on his face. “What a flake.” 

“Seriously.” Mingyu chuckled, turning back to the pork steaming into his eyes. “Ugh, I’m starving. Have you eaten?”

Joshua nodded. “I ate on my break.” Mingyu hummed, scooping up a spoonful of rice and holding it in Joshua’s direction. He chuckled, leaning down and taking the bite. “Thank you,” he said, covering his mouth while he chewed.

“Does that make me your new favorite customer?” He asked, eyes sparkling. Joshua laughed. 

“Yeah, sure.” He said. He sank into the seat across from Mingyu, resting his chin in his hand.

“What are you doing?” Mingyu asked.

“Taking a break.”

“You said you took one.”

“Well, my favorite customer is here now, so.” Joshua’s eyebrows wiggled. Mingyu chuckled. For a minute, the pair sat and chatted. Joshua talked about the shift thus far, being exhausted well through the lunch rush and only now having a minute to rest. Mingyu could sympathize with memories of his part-time work here. Despite that, Joshua talked with a smile. He’d only been working here for six months at this point, but it seemed he managed to fit in quite well. Maybe it was the Hong name.

Eunchae walked over again, carrying a tray of empty dishes to bring to the back. “What are you doing?” he asked Joshua as she took Mingyu’s empty cup. Joshua glanced up. “Grandma’s gonna kill you if she catches you sitting.” Joshua grinned.

“Yeah, I know.” He said. He turned to Mingyu again, offering a sympathetic smile. It was clear he didn’t want to get up and go just yet. 

Eunchae smiled as she looked at Mingyu. “This afternoon, a group of older women came in for lunch, and Joshua-Oppa spent almost the entire time they were here at their table. He wasn’t even serving them!” 

“They liked me!” Joshua’s eyes widened. “I was just giving my best customer service.” He huffed. “Damn, to be needed, I guess.” Mingyu laughed. Just then, Joshua turned his head as someone called him for another beer, nodding his head in acknowledgement. See, I’m needed.” Joshua slowly got up from his seat, raising his hand to the patron. “Finish the one you have first!” He demanded with a grin on his face. “I gotta go.” He said to Mingyu. 

“What time do you work till tonight?” He asked, turning his head as Joshua started off. He stopped, looking back at Mingyu. “I can wait for you to get off.”

“I took overtime,” Joshua said. Mingyu’s eyes widened.

“What?!” He asked. “You did?!”

Joshua laughed, nodding his head. “Yeah, now you know how it feels.” He cooed teasingly before walking off to check on the other nearby tables. Mingyu huffed, turning back to his food with a pout. He turned his head as he ate, watching as Joshua chatted with the same man who asked for another beer, his hands on his hips. He was joking with them, motioning to the unfinished beers on the table with a playfully annoyed glare in his eye and a laugh that reverberated through the entire restaurant. It was arguably one of the best meals Mingyu’s had in a while. 

—---------------------

“Man, I’m tired.”

Mingyu looked up from the couch, motioning him over almost immediately and grinning when Joshua dragged his feet without any protest. He plopped down on the seat next to him, lolling his head back on the couch. “How the hell do you take so much overtime, Mingyu? I’m surprised you’re not dead in a ditch at this point.”

“What were you doing?” Mingyu asked, setting his laptop on the end table. He reached his hand over, turning Joshua a bit in his seat. He rubbed his hands together before pressing them into Joshua’s shoulder. The older sighed in relief at the tension being rubbed out of his shoulders.

“Well, I was helping clean up and prep for tomorrow.” He said. “I’m just not used to working that long.” Mingyu huffed.

“Aww, poor Hyung,” Mingyu whined, and Joshua huffed at the mockery. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to Joshua’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go shower? Dinner should be ready soon.” 

“Yeah.” Mingyu watched as Joshua got off the couch, making his way down the hall and to their bathroom. He smiled to himself, turning back to the kitchen just in time for the timer to get off. He hopped off the couch and jogged inside, reaching for his oven mitts and opening up the oven. 

Mingyu heard the shower running while he finished cooking and plating the meal, setting two plates of chicken teriyaki and rice on the table with plenty of side dishes. Just as he tugged off the oven mitts, he heard the bathroom door open, turning his head as Joshua scurried into his room. Mingyu couldn’t help but smile, listening in on the rustling around, he heard just a wall away. 

The rustling came to a pause a few minutes later, and Mingyu started down the hall. He leaned against the archway, peering towards the bedroom. Joshua was mumbling to himself, puttering around near the bed. All of a sudden-.

“Mingyu, what the fuck is this?!”

Mingyu grinned as Joshua came flying out of the room. In his hand were two slips of paper. Mingyu furrowed his brows.

“What’s that?” he asked. Joshua scoffed, walking closer. 

“Don’t play dumb, smarty,” Joshua demanded. He held the papers up closer, and Mingyu could see the picture of an airplane under Joshua’s shaking grip. “What the hell-.”

“Surprise.” Joshua looked back at the papers again, still in disbelief. “I just bought them when I got home.” 

“Mingyu, these are round-trip tickets to Los Angeles!” He said. “How the fuck did you manage these?!”

“I’ve taken a couple of extra shifts at the cafe, and took on a job on campus between my classes. And I’ve been saving wherever I could.” His voice was softer now, and he watched as Joshua began to crumble. His eyes pricked red, his hand running over the paper to make sure it was real. That they were a stress-related hallucination. Mingyu watched silently, letting Joshua process the realization of the situation in his own time. 

“Mingyu.” his voice cracked. “I don’t-.”

“We don’t have to go and do anything specific,” he assured quickly, aware of Joshua’s hesitancy. “If you’re not ready. But I know how badly you’ve wanted to go. And you’ve been working hard this year.” He finally reached out, running a hand through Joshua’s hair. “You deserve a vacation.” Joshua sighed, his body giving out and leaning onto Mingyu’s chest. He smiled. “Is that ok? You’re not upset with me, are you?”

“No.” Joshua looked up at him. “No, I’m not. I just kind of… pushed all of this to the back burner for so long I almost forgot about it...” he gripped the paper and nodded his head. “Wow…” his eyes fell to the date. “...I have to pack.”

“Hyung, we leave in a month.” Mingyu laughed, but Joshua was already turning towards the bedroom. He reached forward, taking his boyfriend’s hand gently. “At least eat first.” He encouraged. Joshua pouted, anxiety coursing through his veins. However, he nodded and allowed Mingyu to guide him back towards the kitchen.

---------------------

“I think I’m gonna throw up.”

Mingyu looked over as Joshua settled into his seat, looking out the window of the plane. They were still on the runway, boarding their flight to Los Angeles. He smiled, gently reaching out and tangling their fingers together.

“You’re starting to sound like me,” Mingyu said. Joshua laughed a bit, his head falling against his seat. 

“I can’t help it.” He said, lolling his head back towards his seatmate. Mingyu tightened their hands together. He seemed to wait for most people to pass them by as they boarded before digging into his carry-on bag. He pulled out a crinkled and slightly ripped manila folder; the name Jiana Hong faded slightly from years of wear. Joshua had held the envelope in his hands many times since leaving his father’s company and obtaining the information, but never once looked inside. Maybe it was nerves holding him back, or the wonder if too much time had passed. Would it be as satisfying as he’d always hoped it would be, or as disappointing as he’d always feared?

“I think you’ll feel better once you look inside,” Mingyu admitted.

Joshua nodded his head. “I know…” he said. Flipping the envelope over, he looked at the opening, the string wrapped tight around the button, keeping it closed. With a sharp inhale, he offered it to Mingyu. “You untie it.”

Mingyu laughed, reaching forward and untying it. Just as he finished, the pilot came over the loudspeaker to announce their departure. Joshua groaned in annoyance, slapping the envelope on his lap. Mingyu offered a sympathetic smile. “You have a long flight ahead of you,” he said gently. “You have more than enough time.” 

Joshua looked down at the envelope again, running his hand over the name once more. “Yeah…” he said softly. 

---------------------

Full Name: Hong Jiana

Maiden Name: Choi Jiana

Birthday: March 11th, 1973Zodiac Sign: Pisces

Blood Type: B+

MBTI: ENFJ

Hometown: San Fransico, California, USA

Current Wareabouts: Los Angeles, California, USA

Place of Employment: CustomCali Restaurant in Los Angeles

College Education: Seoul National University - 1992 - 1995. 

Other Marriages: N/A

Other Children: N/A

Last attempted contact to the Hong residence: December 31st, 2013

Last attempt at entering the country: February 19th, 1997

Custody Hearing (February 18th, 1997)

Sole custody of 18-month-old male child, Hong Jisoo, is hereby given to Hong Jiwon in accordance with…

Court Hearing (Dated February 19th, 1997):

As of February 19th, 1997, Hong Jiana is forbidden to re-enter the country of South Korea, or have any contact with her ex-husband, Hong Jiwon, and her son, 18-month-old Hong Jisoo…

Joshua looked up as the loudspeaker came back on, listening as the pilot announced their upcoming descent into Los Angeles. Had it been that long already? It felt as if he’d just opened the files. Turning his head, he saw the nighttime lights of Los Angeles twinkling under him, and his breath caught in his throat.

“Mingyu…” he whispered, hearing the other stir awake beside him. “We’re here.” 

Mingyu leaned over to get a better look, and Joshua took momentary comfort in the warmth radiating off of him. “Excited?” Mingyu asked, sleep still heavy in his voice. Joshua bit his lip, nodding his head.

“Yes…” he said softly. 

---------------------

“This is it?” Mingyu asked. Joshua’s steps slowed as he looked down at the envelope for Jeonghan, finally ripped open. It had been like a map for him despite not knowing what was inside until a few hours prior. CustomCali was written on the paper, and when he looked up, the same name was written in metal LED lights. Joshua looked around the perimeter of the restaurant jutting out from the corner of the street. It seemed a majority of its seating was outside, covered by a lattice, see-through ceiling littered in layers of shrubbery and florals. All of the seating was a mix of metal and wood to add to that rustic, outdoorsy vibe. Joshua peeked inside, where there was a to-go bar right in front of a bit more indoor seating. It was still pretty early, the place only opened at 11, and it was just barely 11:30, but Joshua was unable to wait any longer once his clock hit 10:59 a.m. He swallowed. 

“I think so,” he said. “It’s nice.” Mingyu nodded in agreement. Joshua looked inside once more, past the handful of customers at the counter. It was then that he noticed a familiar face, and he immediately turned away. “Shit, I think I see her.”

“Yeah?” Mingyu asked. “Where?” 

“Don’t!” Joshua pulled him away from the door, his face buried in Mingyu’s arm. “She’s at the counter right now talking to another worker. She has short, black hair. Don’t make it obvious you’re staring inside.” 

Mingyu didn’t speak for a minute. Joshua finally gained the courage to look up. He saw the woman push off the counter and start towards a table, just barely out of view. He cursed under his breath. “I can’t go in there, not with this many people inside.” 

“Well, it’ll probably only get busier.” Mingyu pointed out. “Want to just come back later?” 

“No. I don’t know what her hours are. What if we miss her?” Mingyu nodded. “I was planning to just wait here all day.”

“That’s… really creepy.” Mingyu nodded, snickering as Joshua swatted his arm. “Ow!” 

Just before the two could squabble, another worker approached. She smiled, her strawberry blonde hair tied into a tight ponytail swinging behind her. “Hi!” She beamed. “Do you need a table? Or are you just picking up?”

“No,” Mingyu said immediately. Joshua looked back into the building as Mingyu tried to buy them time with his broken English. Finally, he stepped forward and caught the young hostess’s attention.

“Is Jiana Hong or… Jiana Choi here?” He asked. The young woman was silent for a minute. 

“And you are?” Joshua felt the words get stuck in his throat, swallowing multiple times to loosen it enough to escape. He couldn’t. His heart was racing. However, it seemed the girl only needed a few seconds. She gasped. “One minute.” She said, hurrying inside. Joshua turned his head as the woman disappeared to the door. “Miss Jiana!?” She shouted as she headed inside. Joshua swallowed, gripping Mingyu’s arm. The two shared a slightly confused look before a set of footsteps was heard returning out to them.

It wasn’t the blonde hostess, but Joshua felt his breath catch in his throat as an older woman with familiar brown hair and similar sharp eyes stepped into view. She was dusting her hands on her apron, but her eyes were locked on the pair.

For a minute, neither of them spoke. Nobody moved. It felt as if the world had stopped. Joshua felt his nails digging into Mingyu’s arm, and he knew he was shaking somewhat. It felt as if he’d been electrocuted and was trying to stay upright.

Without missing a beat, Jiana walked over. Joshua finally stepped back from Mingyu enough, instinct telling him to prepare. Jiana’s eyes were already watering as she immediately locked her arms around Joshua, and almost 30 years of weight exhaled from his body. 

“Hi.” She said softly. 

“Hi…” he said softly. He looked down, realizing his hands hadn’t even moved to hug her back yet. His eyes were heavy, but he had no urge to cry. Jiana pulled back, turning her head to the inside of the building. 

“I’m taking the outside patio before we open it for the day!” She called. Not even waiting for a response, she motioned them around the corner. “Come sit.” She said softly. 

The trio took a seat at one of the tables, and again silence fell over them. Joshua’s hands were digging into his own pants until Mingyu gently coaxed one out with his own hand overtop. Jiana exhaled, finally finding the courage to speak.

“How’d you find me?” she asked softly. Joshua looked up, glancing at Mingyu. “Would it be easier to talk in Korean?” Joshua swallowed, nodding his head. He couldn’t look her in the eyes again; he felt like a kid getting scolded for skipping school. 

“I’ve been looking for you since I was a teenager,” he mentioned. “But I finally got all of the information from…. Him… last year.” Jiana nodded in understanding. “I just finally worked up the courage to find you.”

“Mmm.” She nodded in understanding. “You look like you’ve grown up well.” She said. Joshua felt the corner of his lips twitch, shrugging his shoulders.

“Thank you, I guess.” He said. He looked at the restaurant beside them. “I hadn’t looked at the stuff about you until I was on my way here,” he said. “It felt like a lot after uhm… well…” 

“I know,” Jiana said softly. Joshua watched as Jiana dug in her apron again, pulling out her phone. She set it on the table, and the couple leaned forward. “One of my coworkers, Anna, is a big K-Pop fan. But she gets so much news on everything that goes on over there. She’s always telling me about it.” She reached for her phone, pulling it out and setting it on the table. The couple leaned forward to see her open an album in her gallery. Even without it being enlarged, Joshua could tell what was in the photos. It seemed to be a scrapbook, littered with pictures of Joshua throughout his life. Early childhood through his entire education, graduating from high school and going for his master’s. His engagement announcement to Namjoo, the smoking scandal. Even the robbery incident at the gala. Anytime Joshua’s name appeared in the papers, it seemed his mother was first to get a clipping of it. “I’ve been working on this for years. I know a lot of people in Koreatown who save papers they get just for me.” She giggled. “But I also have to print some of them out online. I took these pictures to show the girls here the scrapbook, because it’s big and hard to carry, but then I never ended up deleting them. I’m glad I didn’t, I always talk about you.”

“Really?” Joshua asked, watching as she scrolled to the most recent photo. It was an article of Joshua at the press conference last year, giving the speech announcing he would leave the company in pursuit of his own dreams. 

“My coworker has told me for years that you would make a fantastic idol if you wanted.” Joshua laughed then, his head falling forward. 

“I don’t think I want the spotlight anymore.” He said. “I just work at a little family-run restaurant now, that’s all.” 

Jiana huffed, closing her phone. “‘That’s all?’ You know I work in a restaurant, right?” She motioned above them, and Joshua and Mingyu both laughed at the comment. She rested her hands on the table, tilting her head. “Do you like it? Your job?”

“Oh. Yeah,” he nodded. “They’re good to me there.” Jiana seemed pleased with that statement, smiling softly.

“I’m sorry.” She said softly. “If you ever thought I just left. You probably have been so upset with me for years.” Her voice was soft. Joshua felt Mingyu’s hand curl around his tighter. “I wanted to come back to Korea, to find you and explain everything. But… your father… he’s good at creating a narrative that works for him, nobody else.”

Joshua smiled sadly. “I know,” he said. “I’ve never thought that.” 

Jiana sighed, relieved. “I tried for years after being sent away to fight for custody, for anything, to fight for you. But I don’t have the connections your father had. I didn’t have the pull. I spent money on the best lawyers, the best defenses, but it never worked.” She sighed. “That’s probably why he made sure to keep such a close eye on me all these years. So I wouldn’t ever come back.” 

“You knew?” Mingyu asked.

“Of course, I did.” She said. “It’s kind of obvious when you’re being watched if you’re not famous enough for paparazzi.” She smirked a bit. “But I kept my head down, and knew one day I’d find you again.” She motioned to the table, the reality in front of them. “Or you’d find me, it seems.” Joshua felt his cheeks heat up, and he nodded his head. “I’m so happy you did.”

“Me too.” He said.

“And I saw your speech.” She said. “That same coworker showed it to me on YouTube.” She exhaled, reaching forward and wrapping her hand around his. Joshua looked down at their hands interlocked on the table, and that stinging in his eyes burned brighter, but her held back for now. “Joshua, it was incredible. I’m so proud of you.” 

“....Thank you,” he whispered. 

Jiana’s head turned towards the inside part of the restaurant, then her fingers curled around Joshua’s hand tighter. When she looked at him again, he could read her eyes. It was time for them to part; these last few minutes were about to be ripped away from him. She sighed. “Duty calls,” she said. 

“I’m sorry we kept you,” Joshua said quickly. Jiana shook her head. 

“Absolutely not. They know all about you. I’m sure they’d give me more time if we weren’t about to open this space up.” She seemed to be thinking for an extra moment, she asked: “How long are you two visiting until?” 

“Friday. We leave early Saturday morning.” Mingyu said. Her eyes sparkled. 

“I’m off Friday,” she said. “Why don’t the two of you, if you want, come over for dinner?” 

Joshua felt his body go rigid. “Really?” he asked.

“Of course,” she said. “I’ll make a big feast, and you can tell me all about everything you guys did on your vacation. It’ll be much more relaxed than here. And the scrapbook looks so much better in person.” She looked at Joshua. “Would that be ok?”

“Uh…” He glanced at Mingyu, who nodded his head. “Yes! Yes, okay. Wait,” he dug in his pocket, tugging out his own phone. “I’ll give you my number.” 

Jiana nodded, opening her own phone again as the pair logged each other’s phone numbers. Joshua set his phone down, watching as Jiana rose from her seat. She rounded the table, enveloping Joshua in another hug. He felt it was much easier to lift his own arms up, able to tightly squeeze her at the waist. “It was… so nice to meet you.” She said softly.

“...You too.” He said. “Nice to meet you, too.”

Jiana pulled back, one of her hands coming up to lovingly run through Joshua’s hair. He could feel the motherly touch instantly, and his entire body relaxed. “I can’t wait to hear all about this one sitting right here.” She hushed in English. Joshua’s eyes widened, unable to hold back the nervous laugh. “You have a much better eye for men than I do, hm?” She motioned to Mingyu, who was already trying to see what he could read on the menu.

“Aha… I mean…” Joshua stammered. Jiana patted his shoulders, putting her hands back against her apron. 

“I’m also looking forward to hearing about the stories of that absolute witch your father was fooling around with!” She said, eyes widening. Joshua immediately matched her expression.

“I have so many,” he said. “I knew without ever seeing a photo of you that he’d downgraded completely!”

“Well, duh! Just take one look at the mirror, and you’ll know where you get your handsome looks from.” She placed a hand on his cheek and smiled softly. “I need to go, okay? I’ll see you Friday.”

“Yes.” He said. Jiana finally pulled away. “Can I… maybe… call you later? When I get back to the hotel?” 

Jiana’s eyes finally looked a bit mushy, and she nodded. “I get home at 8 tonight. It’s my long night. I’ll be waiting.” Joshua nodded in understanding. “...Have a seat. I’ll have Anna serve you some lunch. On me, okay?” Joshua glanced down at Mingyu, who nodded.

“Did you expect me to leave without trying something here?” He asked. Jiana smiled again, waving to the two of them. Joshua watched her step back inside, and his eyes locked on her until she’d disappeared further into the building. He swallowed hard, feeling Mingyu gently guide him back into his seat. His hand gently rubbed into Joshua’s back.

“She’s nice.” He said softly.

“Incredibly.” Joshua hushed. “I still can’t believe it.” 

“I’m happy for you, Hyung,” Mingyu said. Joshua nodded his head. “Let’s have a good rest of our trip, so we can tell her all about it on Friday, hm?” 

Joshua looked up as Anna walked over, already giddy about the entire situation, it seemed. He smiled as she passed them menus, scanning the options. When he turned his head back inside, he caught a glimpse of Jiana walking past. Her eyes were red, but she was smiling just as big. 

—---------------------

After their brunch, the pair spent the rest of the day wandering around Santa Monica Pier. They made sure to do more than enough shopping and take plenty of photos. They stayed until the sky began turning a purplish orange and headed back to the hotel. On the way, they stopped at King Taco, and now Joshua insists it’s the only place they stop to eat for the rest of their trip. 

As the pair headed into their hotel room, Joshua sat on the edge of the bed. “Is your face ok?”

Mingyu rubbed his nose, which was now in a bandage after an unfortunate meeting with the floor after attempting to look cool on the rope rings at Muscle Beach. “I’m fine.” He mused, pouting. Joshua refused to let it go; he even got a picture. 

“Awww, I’m sorry.” Joshua teased, opening his arms to take Mingyu in a hug. The larger accepted, flopping directly on top of him. “Oof!” Joshua looked up at him, kissing right above the bandage and running a hand through his hair. “You’re still handsome.”

“Thanks.” He pouted. “I’m going to take a shower. Want to join me?” 

“I want to lie down for a minute. I’ll probably shower later.” He swung his legs up onto the bed and opened up his phone, seeing a flashing 8:00 p.m. flashing in his face. He felt his breath hitch.

Can I call you?

Joshua swallowed, his heart starting to pick up speed in his chest despite not moving. He pressed a hand to his eyes, feeling droplets forming in his eyes. “Shit.”

The bed shifted, and Joshua looked over to see Mingyu kneeling in front of him. He looked down from the edge of the bed. His shirt was tugged off. The shower was running behind them, but not yet occupied. “You ok?”

“Mhm. Yeah.” Joshua said. “I just… I’m fine. I don’t know why I’m crying now, I… haven’t seen her in hours.”

“We’ve been busy all day; you probably haven’t had time to process it.” Mingyu reached forward, wiping Joshua’s eyes. He sniffled, his head falling forward. Without meaning to, Joshua finally covered his face with his hands and felt the first of many held-back sobs escape his body. The bed shifted, and Joshua allowed himself to be moved into a tight hug, his head pressed against Mingyu’s chest as he continued to cry. It only made him cry harder, and he couldn’t stop. 

Mingyu stayed silent, running a hand through his hair and planting soft kisses on his scalp. Joshua couldn’t help it; every feeling that was bubbling in his body since 11 this morning was finally able to escape. 

“Take it easy, Hyung. It’s ok.” 

Joshua hiccupped behind his sobs. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok.” He assured. “They’re happy tears, right? Like, this isn’t because I fell, right? I promise I’m ok.” Joshua finally managed a laugh, a bit broken and filled with sobs, but clear enough for him to feel a bit lighter. 

“Yes.” He finally pulled back, wiping his eyes on the bottom of his tank top. “Shit. I really didn’t want to cry.”

“I honestly was shocked you didn’t until now,” Mingyu said. “Your body is probably exhausted from everything today, and you couldn’t hold it in anymore.” He nodded his head. “You should shower and head to sleep.” 

Joshua looked down at his phone. “I said I would call.”

“You can,” he said. “After you shower.” Mingyu pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Come on.” Joshua sniffled, nodding his head as he followed Mingyu inside.

Mingyu lathered up Joshua’s hair, washed down his body, and made sure all the tension in his body was gone. Even for a phone call, Joshua had to be feeling his best, and Mingyu was happy to oblige. He made sure to offer plenty of kisses on his shoulders and head as well, just to sweeten the deal.

Dressed in a pair of fresh pajamas, Joshua and Mingyu crawled into bed. For a minute, they sat there, preparing for some sort of mental marathon that only one of them was about to run. 

Joshua looked at the newest number in his phone, and he swallowed. “I shouldn’t be nervous, I’ve already met her.”

“It’s ok to be nervous. I’d be nervous.” Mingyu said. He reached forward, rubbing Joshua’s shoulders gently. “You’ll be ok. I can leave if you want me to.”

“No, I don’t,” he said. “I want you to stay.” Mingyu smiled. Joshua chuckled, finally reaching forward and hovering over the green phone button displayed on his screen. “What should we talk about?”

Mingyu shrugged. “Ask her how work was. Tell her about King Taco.” He smiled. “Just don’t tell her I fell on my face.” Joshua smiled. “You don’t have to tell her much, you know. You have forever to do that.” 

Joshua blinked. “...I want to tell her about you.” He said gently.

Mingyu nodded. “Okay…” He said. “Just again, please, just not the rope rings. I still taste the sand in my mouth..” 

“Okay.” Joshua laughed. He bit his lip, leaning forward to offer a quick peck, maybe more for encouragement for himself than anything. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Hyung,” Mingyu said softly. 

Joshua nodded his head, finally lowering his finger and pressing the green button. He kept it on speaker, letting the noise vibrate through his bones. Finally, on the third ring, it picked up and a voice that was finally allowed to feel familiar filled the other line. “Hi, uh.. Jian, er, Mom?” he stammered. “It’s me… It’s Joshua.” 

The Hong Corporate building looked more ominous than normal when the car pulled in front of it. He tilted his head out the window, staring up at the building that seemed to reach the tips of the sky the longer he looked at it. He could hear the sound of a car door opening, and when he glanced up, Junhui was standing there. 

“You alright?” he asked gently. Joshua nodded his head before finally slipping out of the car. The first thing he did was look around the front of the lot, past the people staring in their direction with curiosity in their eyes. A car pulled up behind him, and when he turned his head, he saw Jeonghan slip out of the driver’s seat with a young woman, the lawyer he had been up half the night talking legalities with. But that wasn’t who Joshua wanted to see. 

“Where is he?” he asked quickly. Junhui motioned behind them, and Joshua turned to see Mingyu jogging across the block, his eyes glued to his watch. Joshua’s shoulders relaxed, specifically when Mingyu’s eyes flickered up, and he broke into a grin.

Joshua rounded the car, leaning against the door as Mingyu approached him. They’d left the hotel their separate ways, and what was really less than 48 hours felt like months apart. His first thought was to tug him down and kiss him senseless, but he simply swallowed. “Hi…” he said.

“Hey.” Mingyu smiled, running a hand through his hair. “Ready?”

Joshua looked over at the building. “I mean, I don’t have much of a choice…” he said simply. “If I don’t do it now, I don’t think I ever will.” 

“Alright…” Mingyu slipped his hand into his pocket. “You have everything?” Joshua motioned to Junhui, who passed over a large briefcase. 

“I think so.”

Jeonghan walked over, hands in his pockets. “Hey, Joshuji.” He cooed, smiling sweetly. His gaze flickered to Mingyu almost immediately. “And Mingoo~.”

“Ah, hi Hyung,” Mingyu said with an awkward nod of his head. Jeonghan giggled a bit. 

Joshua glanced at Junhui before finally taking the plunge and starting towards the front of the building. He kept his gaze straight, only staring at the guards monitoring the front door. Whispers dug into his ears, employees wondering what had Joshua back at the building and looking so… determined. He wondered how much word had circulated the building, but he wasn’t planning on staying long enough to find out.

Joshua approached the guard, who immediately pushed the door open for him and Junhui. He walked past, before something behind him caught his attention. 

“Sorry, you can’t come in.”

Joshua turned his head to see the guard, and now two more, standing in front of Mingyu. Joshua’s heart stopped, left only to watch as the guard continued speaking. “We were told not to let you in, Mingyu. I’m sorry.”

Mingyu shook his head. “Nothing to apologize for,” he said gently, smiling. “I understand.”

“Ming-.”

Mingyu looked up at Joshua, and only then did he look a bit upset. “I’ll be okay out here, alright?” he assured. 

“But I’m letting him in, so-.” Joshua was stopped when the guard turned to him, sympathy in his face.

“Your father specifically said to keep Kim Mingyu off the premises.”

It made sense, but it was only set to make Joshua’s blood boil more. He huffed, watching as Jeonghan slipped back through the front door, putting his arm around Mingyu’s broad shoulders.

“Don’t worry, Joshuji, he and I will go across the street and wait for you there,” he assured, grinning. Joshua cocked an eyebrow, watching Mingyu’s expression morph into one of slight panic. “Riiiiight, Mingoo?”

“Oh, yes. Of course, Hyung, let’s go.” Mingyu glanced at Joshua from over the guards, offering a soft smile, before Jeonghan dragged him away.

“I’ve never been here before, have you? What do you recommend?” Joshua heard Jeonghan say as he and Mingyu started off. He watched Mingyu dig into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. Joshua could already picture his face as he calculated the total of whatever nonsense Jeonghan was spewing. 

He’d be lying if he said the scene didn’t ease him a bit. They’d be waiting for him when he stepped out of here for good. 

Turning back to Junhui and his lawyer, he nodded his head, and the trio started towards the elevator. 

The trip up to his father’s floor was dead silent, only the rustling of feet echoing off the elevator walls. Joshua’s arms were tightly snug around his chest, his fingers squeezing into his arms. 

“It’ll be alright,” Junhui said softly. Joshua glanced over, seeing Junhui’s smile. “Jeonghan-hyung isn’t that much of a monster to make Mingyu pay for lunch.”

Joshua chuckled, a moment of levity as he nodded his head. “Oh, he absolutely is.” And the elevator shook to a stop. Joshua exhaled, starting down the hall. 

The walk felt longer than normal, but finally, Joshua was met with the doors leading into his father’s office. He glanced up at them, exhaling all of his worries in a trembling breath. “Okay, then,” he said. His mind flickered to the person waiting across the street to welcome him back, good or bad, with open arms, and he reached up to knock on the door.

“Come.”

Junhui opened the door, and Joshua strolled in, seeing his father glance up from the paperwork in front of him. Mrs. Hong was sitting on the couch, tea just about to hit her lips as she looked over. Mr. Park was at his side explaining something, and both of them seemed to share the same expression of the trio walking into the office: utter confusion.

“Hello,” Joshua said, nodding his head.

Mr. Hong leaned back in his seat. “What the hell is all this, Jisoo?”

“I want to talk to you.” 

“About what? And who the hell is this?” he motioned to the woman already approaching his desk. She passed over a card, nodding her head.

“Pleasure to meet you. My name is Moon Yerim, senior lawyer at the Moon & Lim Firm. I’m here to represent Joshua Hong.”

“Joshu-.” Mr. Hong looked down at the card in his hand, frowning. “What the hell is this about?”

“I know you lied to me about Mingyu.”

Mr. Hong’s eyes narrowed. “So you met with him? Tsk, you know you’re unbelievable. I give you one direction.

“Because you knew I’d find out that you lied, and he didn’t take your money.” Joshua inhaled. 

“That’s hardly a legal matter.” He said, eyeing the lawyer.

“I know. I’m not here to talk about him.”

“Then what the hell are you here for, hm? If not only to continue to whine about M-.”

“Don’t even think about saying his name.” Joshua sneered. “It’s about you.”

“Hah, me? Please, Jisoo, this is ridic-.”

“We’re insisting you address Mr. Hong by the name he’s chosen, Sir.” Yerim cut in immediately. Mr. Hong scoffed, tossing the card onto his desk and eyeing his son. It sent a shiver down his spine, but Joshua only stood straighter.

“I’m done playing your games. I want out, and I know you won’t give me the satisfaction of just leaving.” He set his case down on the table in front of him. “So, I’m here to make you a deal, to make you both-.” his eyes flickered to the side couch where Mrs. Hong was sitting. “A deal.” 

For a moment, Mr. Hong looked amused. His eyes flickered to his wife before falling back to his son. “...Fine. Fine, you want to talk business for once in your life, I’m all ears.” 

Joshua inhaled, nodding his head. “Alright, then.” He walked to the open chair across from his father’s desk and finally sat down. “I’ll start by saying, despite everything, I don’t want to end things on bad terms.”

“Yet you’ve brought a lawyer.”

“I knew you wouldn’t listen to me. Or you’d somehow convince me to do what is best for you and not me. She’s just a safety net.” He looked over at Yerim. “No offense.”

“None taken,” she said simply.

Joshua turned back to his father. “I’ve been brought up with the idea that I’ll take over this company at some point. And…. despite everything… I want to do that.”

“Oh? You’ve never acted like you’ve wanted it. If anything, you’ve acted as if you’d rather do anything else.”

“Yes, because you don’t listen to me.” Joshua insisted. “You act like I’m a pawn in your business games of chess to use when you need. From my childhood, to my education, to my roles in the company, to my marriage, it’s all been for your benefit and not mine.” He shifted. “I don’t think I need to spell out for you that is not how parents are supposed to go about raising their children.” 

“Please, I raised you to be someone who will survive in a cutthroat world like this one. Someone who knows how to act and when, how to look out for himself only.”

“Right. You have. And I plan to do just that.” He inhaled. “I don’t want to have a lawyer and come here making deals about my future with my own father, you know. It wasn’t something that was on my bucket list of things to do growing up.” 

Mr. Hong rolled his eyes, and Joshua inhaled. He looked down at the briefcase at his feet. 

“But I know it’s my birthright to be given this company, and I want to be able to see it through if I can.”

“And what do you want in exchange? You haven’t lost that right…” he trailed off. “Yet.”

“I just want to be independent. I don’t want to be treated like I’m five, being told how to run every aspect of my life.” He paused. “And I don’t just mean the haircuts and the outfits.”

“Ah…” he pushed his chair back. “You mean Min-.” Joshua’s eyes narrowed. “...Him."

“No,” Joshua said. “Well… not specifically.” Joshua sat up straighter. “I want to take over this company, knowing I won’t be scrutinized, knowing that I will be the one making the decisions. I want someone at my side who respects me and cares for me, and-.”

“Namjoo does.”

“She does, but not in that way, and you know it.” 

“So… what? You want me to just… allow you to tarnish this company’s reputation by running around with some man? Hm, I don’t think so, Son. Try again.”

Joshua nodded his head, swallowing a tightness in his throat as he looked back down at his lap. “Fine. Then I want to sell you the stocks you gave me and be done with this company for good.”

“You’re kidding me.” Mr. Hong scoffed. 

“No. The company isn’t doing as well as you claim it is, Father.” Joshua said. “I know it’s not. I’m not going to sit here on a sinking ship and be miserable if I don’t have to.”

“How dare you!” Mr. Hong was out of his seat now, glaring down at Joshua with rage. But Joshua forced himself to stare back, straightening his posture. 

“We can waste all the time in the world sitting here looking at the paperwork.” Joshua pulled out a clipped stack of papers from his bag. “I was up all night gathering every piece of information on the company’s finances since you sent me to London. If you’ve taught me to look after myself, then I’m doing just that.”

Mr. Hong clicked his tongue. “And what if I said no, hm? I refuse to sell you back your stocks and bar you from taking over until I’m dead in the dirt. Then what?”

Joshua shifted. “I’ll go public with everything.”

“Tsk. Everything, hm? How so?” 

“I’ll say I’m leaving your company because of the way you’ve mistreated not only me but your employees.” His mind flashed to Seungcheol raking his hands through his hair and rubbing his bag-heavy eyes for weeks on end. “How you’ve paid multiple people into silence for disagreeing with you… How you’ve both done nothing but be the worst excuse for parents I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“And this is all because of Min-”

“I said don’t say his name.” Joshua snapped immediately, eyes narrowing. “And I also said it’s not just about him. You don’t listen. It’s about all of it. The years of lies and mistreatment and complete disregard for everything I’ve ever stood for.” 

“Nobody will believe you. If anything, they’ll give you the evil eye for all the adultery you’ve committed on Namjoo. For running around and being so disgusting. You’ll lose support before you even gain it. People have been talking about your relationship with her for years. You think they’ll just drop it because you say you’re involved with some idiot?” 

“Most won’t,” Joshua admitted. “I know that most of the people within a ten-foot radius are practically crushed under your thumb. And I know I’ve made many mistakes and hurt many people with my actions. I know it’s risky to do, but I don’t care. I want to be honest with myself for once in my life, and I won’t let you stop me.”

“Honesty will get you nothing. So go, make a fool of yourself, and leave the company. You’ll get nothing from me, just like I’ve always told you.”

Joshua nodded. “I figured you’d say that.” He sighed. “Just know that if I do this, it won’t stay within Korea. It won’t die before it spreads the way everything else you don’t like does.” Mr. Hong’s eyebrow raised. “If this job has done anything good for me, it’s given me connections in the West.” He ran a hand through his hair. “And those connections are far more open-minded than you.”

“And what does that mean?”

Joshua thought back to a phone call he’d made late last night. Mingyu was sleeping on his lap, papers strewn about, and a pen barely hanging from behind his ear. Joshua watched his chest rise and fall as he waited for the phone to ring.

“Mr. Taylor,” Joshua said. “I’m sorry to bother you so late.”

“Ah! Jisoo! How are you?” 

“Not… great, if you want me to be honest.” He gulped. “I just wanted to tell you that, as of tomorrow, I may not be the person you will be discussing business with for Hong Corporations. I’m sorry, I didn’t want to surprise you.”

“Oh? May I ask why? That sounds like such a big thing. Are you not taking over the company?”

“I… don’t know. I’m planning to talk with my father. He has…” he looked down at Mingyu, running a hand through his hair. “He has made my life difficult for a long time, just because of the people I chose to associate with,” he gulped. “Or… should I say… the people I chose to love.”

Mr. Taylor inhaled. “Ah. I see.” For a minute, he was silent, but he made sure to add, “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I have made good connections with you. Not your father. If you end up going your seperate ways with Hong International, you’ll still have a connection with us.”

Joshua smiled softly. “Thank you.” 

Joshua looked up at his father. “If I go public, not only will you lose some favor here, but every investor you’ve been trying to rub elbows with in the West will know. They will hear about how you’ve suppressed, beaten down, abused your only son and heir, and forced him to act a certain way for years.” He shrugged. “A few won’t care, I know that. But the ones I’ve spoken with will…” he inhaled. “Because they’re just like me. And they won’t want to give their money to a monster like you. Nor will their own customers want to support someone like you. It’ll take some time, but I will make sure the ripple effect turns into a tidal wave and crashes right onto this company.” 

Mr. Hong was silent for longer than usual. He inhaled, looking down at the paperwork that was put on his desk. He must have waited for the anxiety in Joshua’s chest to bubble into stinging in his eyes, because he finally spoke. “All of this just for Kim Mingyu? You weren’t this passionate when I sent your other flings away.”

Joshua bit his lip. “All this for me.” He said simply. “I’m not hiding myself, or him, anymore. It’s your choice on how I remain in your life, if I do at all.” 

The look on Mr. Hong’s face was that of intensity. He stared down at all of the paperwork he was provided, as if he’d never seen any of it before in his life. “This is unbelievable.” Mr. Hong huffed. “All I’ve ever done for you, and this is the thanks I get?!” He pushed the papers aside and shook his head. “This meeting is a waste of time.”

Joshua swallowed, standing up. “Then I’ll start the process of selling my stocks,” he said. “And drafting a public statement.” His father looked up at him.

“You’re all talk. I know you are.” Mr. Hong said simply. Joshua took a sharp, deep breath when it felt like he’d crumple under the weight of the tension in the room. “You’ve always been all talk. You can leave for a few days and spend it with your little boyfriend, but when you realize he’s nothing, that he can’t provide for you, and you need money, then you’ll come crawling back to.”

Joshua reached into his coat pocket, pulling out his wallet. Thumbing through it, he pulled out all of his black cards. As he slammed each one of his credit cards onto his father’s desk, he pictured the vacations, the meals, the things he’s spoiled himself with. The things he’s spoiled Mingyu with, leaving his grasp within seconds. 

He’d never felt lighter.

“I don’t need your money,” he said simply. “Not like this, at least.” He watched his father study the handful of cards on his desk and scoffed, rubbing his chin.

“You’re making a mistake.” He said, but Joshua didn’t say anything. Finally, Mr. Hong exhaled. “Fine.” He said simply. “Sell your stocks. Announce your departure from the company.” He shook his head. “But once you do, there’s no coming back.” 

Joshua nodded. “Good,” he said simply. “That’s how I want it.”

Mr. Hong was silent for a long minute. Joshua turned to Yerim, who simply nodded her head in assurance that as of now, things were going ok. Mrs. Hong was in the corner of his eye, silently watching the entire thing unfold.

“I’m surprised you have nothing to say.” He said. She looked over at him.

“What can I possibly say? This is between you and your father. Not me.” 

Joshua scoffed. “That’s the smartest thing I have ever heard you say.” he shook his head. He only acknowledged his father again when he turned to Mr. Park. 

“Set up a press conference for the end of the month.” His eyes turned to his son. “Will that do?”  

Joshua’s lip tightened into a forced smile, something faint shattering in his chest as he watched Mr. Park move around the table. “Fine.” Mr. Hong sighed. 

“You’re just like your mother.”

“That’s another thing,” Joshua said. “I want her information.”

“Oh, seriously?” He groaned. “You really are greedy.”

Joshua pushed the insult aside and only continued to speak. “I want everything you have on her.” Mr. Hong rolled his eyes. “When I’m gone, what will you want with it?” 

Mr. Hong huffed. “Mr. Park,” he called. “Get Jiana’s file.” 

Joshua felt his chest tighten as the name hit his ears, and he turned to see Mr. Park head to a safe in the room, one Joshua never even knew was there. He unlocked it, and pulled out the thick manila envelope inside. 

Mr. Park walked over to Joshua, the duo locking eyes as the envelope was passed between them. Joshua nodded his head politely and saw a faint smile on Mr. Park's face before finally disappearing out of the room to make the necessary preparations. Joshua looked down at the envelope, almost bursting at the seams with how much was inside. 

“...How much information do you have on her?” He asked softly, his voice finally starting to tremble.

“Well, she was my wife.” Mr. Hong said dismissively. “And I needed to make sure she never attempted to come back into the country for almost 30 years.” his eyes flickered down to the envelope, and he almost sneered at it. Like a scorned lover was in front of him. “Don’t come crying to me when you end up disappointed.”

“I never have,” Joshua said simply. He turned to Junhui, passing the envelope over before reaching for his briefcase. “I’ll leave Yerim to finish with any legal paperwork she needs to bring to me.” He said simply. “And I’ll take my leave now.”

Mr. Hong only glanced at his wife, and Joshua followed suit. She was simply drinking her tea, her eyes closed as she took in the situation. Joshua didn’t even spare her a goodbye before starting towards the door. 

Before he walked through, Joshua turned back. “Oh, I didn’t think I needed to say it, but I should anyway. When the money goes through, and I finish this press conference, neither of you contact me. Ever again.” 

He left the room before either could respond, allowing the door to close behind him. 

The walk back to the elevator was longer than the first time, and Joshua could barely find the strength to walk. But he managed, staggering into the elevator with Junhui close behind. He leaned against the wall, listening as Junhui pressed the button and the elevator shook alive before descending. The space was silent for a minute, and Joshua broke it by trying to take a breath that resembled something similar to a sob.

“Hyung?” Junhui called, and Joshua looked over. “Are you okay?”

“...Oh. Yeah, I’m fine.” He assured quickly. “I didn’t… I think it went well.”

“It did,” Junhui agreed, smiling. “I didn’t think he’d go for it. I really thought he’d of agreed to make you head of the company for a minute.”

Joshua laughed, dry and pained. “Please. He’d rather disown me than let me run the company and be out at the same time…” he shifted on his shaky feet. “Clearly.”

“Well…” Junhui stepped closer. “At least it’s over. Until the press conference. But I’ll handle any meetings that I can. Okay?”

Joshua nodded his head. “Yeah. Thanks.” As silence returned, Joshua felt his eyes begin to sting. 

Junhui’s smile softened, a supportive hand on his shoulder. “You can cry if you want to,” he said. “I won’t tell.”

“Heh. Cry about what? This is what I wanted.” He shook his head. “I don’t need to cry.”

“Well, you just cut ties with your father. It’s emotional, even with everything.” Junhui assured, and Joshua couldn’t help but laugh again.

“Yeah, well, I don’t need to cry about it,” he said. “I just need this next month to be over so I can never…. Speak to him again.” 

Without me, you are nothing, remember that, Jisoo.

Joshua rubbed his eyes, taking a deep breath just in time for the elevator to reach the bottom floor. It opened to curious eyes, immediately locking on the pair inside, and following them as they headed back out the door. 

  Joshua was just to the front door when a familiar face slipped into view. His pace slowed just enough, turning to allow Seungcheol to jog over to him.

“What’s going on?” he asked. His eyes scanned Joshua’s face, and immediately, his eyes widened. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes,” Joshua said simply. He clicked his tongue. “And… uhm… sorry.”

“Sorry?” Seungcheol’s brows furrowed. “For what?”

Joshua stared at him for a minute, but simply shook his head. “For you know…” his hand moved in front of him. “Everything. But I have to go…” And he continued out the door.

Joshua sprinted across the street the second the light turned green, turning left and entering the cafe. The worker’s voice at the front door sounded like a whisper as his eyes immediately began scanning the area for a familiar set of heads. By the time he glanced to the back corner, he saw them.

“Mingyu.” He called, walking past the confused hostess and towards the curious puppy that glanced up at the call of his name. 

Jeonghan turned his head, but it was Mingyu getting out of his seat that he was trained on. “Hey.” His voice was gentle, unsure, as he stepped closer. “How’d it go?”

Joshua’s pace slowed as he reached Mingyu, his mouth opening for no words to come out. “Uh…” he said softly. “...Fine…” he said softly.

Mingyu smiled softly. “Good.” He said gently. He turned to the table, motioning to the open seat beside him. “I got you coffee, but I ordered it too early, so it’s kind of cold now.” 

Joshua looked down at the full coffee cup in the open seat, and he immediately felt those tears that were burning in his eyes on the elevator make a return in full force. He swallowed, running a hand through his hair. 

Within seconds of the first tear being wiped away, Mingyu’s arms were outstretched, tugging Joshua into a tight hug. He immediately lifted his arms to lock at Mingyu’s shoulders, burying his head into his shoulder and exhaling shakily. “Hyung, what’s wrong? You said it went well….” 

“It did,” Joshua said. “It did, I’m fine… I really don’t know why I’m crying.” 

Mingyu’s hand pressed firmly onto Joshua’s back, keeping him close despite the curious eyes of other patrons in the cafe. “Okay… Good job, then.” Mingyu said gently, and Joshua only hugged him tighter. 

“Thank you…” He breathed softly. 

---------

“Dinner should be ready soon.”

Joshua’s eyes flickered up to the kitchen, where Mingyu was moving around between the counters. The rice cooker was blaring, and the food was sizzling in the pan, yet all of it felt like dead noise in Joshua’s ears. His body had felt heavy all day, and the first thing he did when the pair arrived at their temporary hotel home was collapse onto the island chair and rest his head on the cool marble. He managed a hum in response, before his eyes fell back to the large manila envelope now resting just an arm's length away from him. 

“Hyung?”

“Hm?” Joshua didn’t look away from the envelope. He heard footsteps, and suddenly a large set of hands was on his shoulders, propping him upright. When he tilted his head, Mingyu looked down at him.

“If you’re tired, get some sleep. You had a long day. I can leave you leftovers in the fridge for later.”

“No, I should eat,” Joshua mumbled. He lolled his head back onto Mingyu’s chest, smiling softly when a soft kiss was planted on the crown of his head. “Go finish.” 

Mingyu nodded, walking back to the counter and turning off the sink. “So…” Joshua’s eyes flickered up, resting his chin on his hand as he watched Mingyu continue to finish dinner. “What’s the next step?” 

Joshua hummed, closing his eyes as he thought. “Well… I spoke with Yerim after she left my father’s office. The money will be in my account in a few business days, once the paperwork is filed and everything. I’m going to meet with her tomorrow to get specifics.” 

“Do you want me to come?”

“Nah.” Joshua shook his head. “You should rest tomorrow, you were up early to meet me at the company building.” Mingyu smiled.

“Alright, but if you change your mind.” Joshua nodded his head. 

Mingyu finally set the bowls of pork and rice on the island, sitting beside Joshua as the duo began to eat. At first, the dinner conversation was light and casual; both of them were talking about something other than the day’s events. Mingyu talked about his sister and Seokmin, things that had nothing to do with anything. Updates on people Joshua could actually sit and get to know properly now, because he had the time to do it. 

Another bite of rice, and the thought of getting to know people mingled in his stomach to make a weirdly unpleasant concoction. Setting his chopsticks down, Joshua turned to the manila envelope once again, untouched since it was placed there.

“...Are you going to look inside?” Mingyu asked curiously, startling Joshua a bit as his voice cut through the silence. 

“I don’t know.” He admitted. “I want to, I’ve spent years wanting to. But now that it’s in front of me-.”

“It almost feels too good to be true?” Joshua nodded in agreement, turning to Mingyu as he took another bite of his food. Without missing a beat, Mingyu’s next scoopful was brought up to Joshua’s mouth, and he smiled softly as he leaned in to take a bite. “Well-.” Mingyu swallowed. “It’s not like it’s going anywhere.”

Joshua tugged the envelope in front of him, running his hand along the Sharpie-written ‘Jiana’ on top. “I just don’t think I’m ready yet.” Mingyu didn’t respond, only offering a sympathetic and slightly curious look for more information. Joshua bit his lip. “I mean, what am I going to show her if I do see her? I don’t have a job anymore, I’ll only have so much money.” His teeth sunk into his bottom lip. “I mean, she might already not want to see me. I can’t go to her with nothing to show for myself.”

“I think you have a lot to show for yourself,” Mingyu said simply. “You’re going to make a huge speech telling the world something very personal about yourself, and you’ve worked hard this far in your job.” Joshua chuckled a bit.  

“Well…” he shook his head. “Regardless, I won’t have much to talk to her about if I’m unemployed and homeless, so I need to get that squared away first.” He gently pushed the envelope away, but not out of reach. “So once the money is settled, I’ll get us a nice place.” He said. “One that your sister can live in too, when she’s home from school. And something close you guys can commute to and from when you have to.”

Mingyu chuckled, resting his chin in his hand. Joshua saw his eyes brighten the more he spoke, and that only made Joshua want to talk more. The idea of the future coming out of his mouth and actually being a possibility was thrilling. “And I have my master's, so I can easily find some kind of a job myself that will help bring in more money.”

“Do you want to go back into business, though?” Mingyu asked. Joshua puckered his lips. 

“...I don’t know,” he admitted. “I don’t think so, but what else can I do?”

“Well…” Mingyu stretched. “You can always do something else until you know for sure. Something easy to move on from. Your masters will always be there.” Joshua nodded as he listened. “I’m picking up more shifts at the cafe too, at least for now.” Mingyu clarified. 

Joshua pursed his lips together, looking at Mingyu. “Well, make sure you leave some room in your schedule.” When Mingyu cocked an eyebrow, Joshua’s lip curled into a smile. 

“Don’t worry.” He laughed. “I promise that I’ll make enough time for you.”

“Good.” Joshua huffed. “But that’s not what I meant.” Mingyu tilted his head. Joshua thumbed at the manila envelope as he tried to form the sentence in his head. “Once I settle things with my father, I want to make sure at least some of the money helps to send you back to school.”

Mingyu’s eyes widened, his chopsticks falling onto the table with a thud. “Wha- hyung…” He leaned forward. “You can’t be serious.”

“Why would I lie about something like that?” Joshua asked, unable to handle his amusement. “I’ve been going back and forth on offering it to you for months. But sending you back to school back then meant you’d leave your job as my bodyguard.” He smiled. “And I couldn’t have that.” 

“Hyung…” Mingyu’s voice trembled a bit. “Seriously?”

“Of course!” Joshua perked up a bit. “How on earth am I going to introduce you to my mother one day if you’re a college dropout?” He saw Mingyu shift in his seat. “Besides… you deserve it, Mingyu. If I’m able to do it, I want to…” 

Mingyu exhaled, wiping his eyes. “That’s crazy. You don’t have to do that.” Joshua nodded.

“I want to,” he said again. Mingyu continued to smile, the size of which almost looked like it hurt, as he leaned in to plant an appreciative kiss on Joshua’s lips. “Hm.” A flicker of satisfaction hit Joshua’s lips as he got up from the island table, grabbing his bowl. “You’ve done more than enough for me; it’s the least I could do. Want more?” 

In his moment of shock, Mingyu looked down at his empty bowl as Joshua rounded the kitchen counter. “Oh. Yeah. Okay. Thank you…”

Joshua stood in front of the pot, filling both of their bowls. He heard Mingyu shuffling around behind him, the chair scraping against the floor as he moved. Within seconds, he was pressed against Joshua’s back, arms loosely hanging around his waist. Joshua’s head tilted up. “I was bringing you more.” 

“I know,” he said. “I just suddenly want to like… hold you really tight.”

“Suddenly?” Joshua laughed, leaning into his embrace. He passed the bowl behind him, resting against the counter as Mingyu sat back down to eat again. Like a bad joke, Joshua found his gaze pulled back to the envelope nearby. He pursed his lips together. 

Mingyu must have noticed, because he spoke up almost immediately: “You know, you don’t have to read any of the information right now. But don’t you want to see what she looks like?” 

Joshua felt that uneasy feeling in his stomach again as he nodded his head. “Yeah. I do.” 

Mingyu smiled, reaching for the envelope. Joshua watched as he flipped open the flap and peeked inside. “Jesus. There’s so much.”

“It’s almost thirty years of information, so I guess that makes sense. I’m honestly surprised there’s only one big folder of information.” When Mingyu pulled out two photos, Joshua couldn’t help but look away, eyes snapping down to the floor by his feet. His heart rate began to pick up. He almost felt silly with how anxious he was getting. 

“So?” Joshua asked. 

“Hyung, you should look.” Mingyu’s voice was gentle, coaxing Joshua to look over. Mingyu was holding up the pictures, eyes beaming with excitement. 

Joshua walked over slowly, gently taking the photos into his hand. They spanned years, from a beaming young adult in the 90s with long brown hair and wide-brown eyes, to a modern-day adult who has only gotten more beautiful with age. 

“You look just like her.”

----------------

-One Month Later-

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” 

“I’m sure, Mingyu.” 

“But Hyung-.”

“Mingyu.” Joshua huffed, lolling his head from his mirror to the bathroom door, where his oversized, pouty boyfriend was standing hunched over. He looked like a dejected dog. Joshua smiled a bit at the sight, raking a hand through his newly cherry red hair. “You said you had to work today after you met with the school advisors. That’s much more important.” 

“But I can reschedule that easily, this conference-.”

“Junhui is on his way to pick me up right now. I’ll be just fine. And I’ll meet you at the school when it’s all done. Okay?” 

“Hyung-.”

“You’ll see it on the news and all over social media, you know. Just open your phone like… right after lunch, and you’ll see the entire thing. I’ll even call you.”

“I…” Joshua’s eyebrows raised as he pressed his hands to his cheeks, rubbing his moisturizer along his skin. “Alright, fine, but call me right when it’s over. Okay?”

“I will. I’ll have Junhui just off stage with your number pulled up for me, sounds good?” Mingyu nodded his head. “Aw, come on, don’t pout, you’ll actually make me start to feel bad.”

“Well, I don’t want to not be there to support you.”

Joshua chuckled, walking over and pinching his cheek. “You’re cute.” Mingyu pouted more. “But you will support me by getting all of your classes finalized for the next semester so that all of this today is worth it, okay?” 

Mingyu huffed. “Fine.”

Joshua patted his chest. “Good. Now go before you miss the bus, alright?”

“Fine.” Mingyu leaned in, pressing a kiss to Joshua’s lips, which was happily returned. “I love you. Good luck.”

“I love you too.” Joshua hummed. The words still felt so new leaving his mouth, but he’d made sure to get plenty of practice with them. He leaned against the door frame as Mingyu finally scrambled for his belongings, slipped on his shoes, and was out the door with one more look in Joshua’s direction. He waited for the door to close before his shoulders sank, and his head rested against the bathroom door frame. “Jeez…” He murmured to himself. “Let’s get this over with, I guess.” 

—------------------

The office was the same type of painfully stuffy that it was a month ago, but this time Joshua had nowhere to run and hide. He was brought to the back of the conference hall, and he could already hear the commotion of the press that were brought in. They were waiting outside, vultures eager to sink their teeth into the freshest, most delicious piece of meat they could before they left. To make the trip worth it. 

Joshua glanced down at his phone, biting the inside of his lip. It was dark, dry as a bone for what felt like hours. Mingyu hadn’t texted him since he got on the bus, leaving Joshua a slave to his own mind the entire drive up here. 

It was bustling backstage, a lot of employees rushing to make sure everything was ready for the Hong’s to step in front of the camera. An atmosphere he was so used to, forced to observe for years in an almost suffocating way. It felt foreign now, and Joshua found himself unsure what to do. He pressed his hands into his lap and looked around the room, watching people scurry around on phones and walkies, trying to make sure their jobs were done. Joshua felt his heart constrict in his chest when he took a deep breath, and his body slumped back on the couch, closing his eyes in hopes to relax. 

“You alright?” 

Joshua glanced up to see a water bottle motioned in his direction, and an awkward smile on Seungcheol’s face as he took it. “Thanks…” he said softly, looking down at the plastic bottle in his hands. “I’m fine.”

“You don’t look good, nervous.”

“I said I’m fine.” Joshua hissed, glaring up at Seungcheol. The older man smirked a bit, holding his hands up in defeat.

“Okay, okay. You’re fine.” He looked around. “Where’s Mingyu?”

“Not here.”

“Pardon?” Seungcheol almost immediately questioned. Joshua uncapped the water and took a long sip, glancing back down at the silent phone on the armrest.

“He’s got school stuff, and I told him not to bother. I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable.”

Seungcheol opened his mouth, and Joshua just fucking knew how badly he wanted to say something, so he simply took another sip of his drink and averted his gaze. “What do you want anyway?”

“Nothing. Just came to check on you.” Seungcheol said. “It sounds like they’re going to start with your fath- er- Mr. Hong soon.”

“You don’t have to be weird. He’s still my father even if I don’t talk to him….” Joshua’s voice was low, running a hand along the cap of the plastic bottle. “But thank you…” 

“Mm… also, Noh Namjoo is outside in the crowd.”

Joshua groaned, his head falling back. “Shit, fuck, god damn it! I told her not to come!”

“I think she just wants to be supportive.” Junhui finally piped up, setting a steaming bowl of ramen in front of Joshua. “You can’t tell everyone to stay away.”

“I sure as fuck can!!” His eyes widened.

“Then who will be in the audience?” Junhui asked, matching his friends' equally wide eyes. 

Joshua sighed, reaching for his phone and opening it up. He had every intention of messaging Namjoo to go home, rather than subjecting herself to certain questioning by nosey press, when he saw a string of about four messages waiting for him.

[Mingyu]: Hyung, I forgot to make sure you ate! You ate, right?

[Mingyu]: I got here earlier than my appointment. I’ll try to at least make it to the end, okay? 

[Mingyu]: Good luck! You got this! 

Joshua stared at the animated sticker of a cheering puppy on the messages, unable to stop chuckling at the panic Mingyu must be feeling. He immediately snapped a photo of the water and ramen, sending it over.

[Joshua]: I’m being taken care of. Focus on your school stuff. 

Leaning back on the couch again, Joshua waited for the ramen to be ready when he heard footsteps coming through the room. He, Seungcheol and Junhui looked over just in time to see Mr. Park leading two people towards the door. Joshua inhaled as his father and wife passed by. Mrs. Hong’s head was low as she listened, and Mr. Hong was nodding along with whatever muffled instructions Mr. Park was giving him.

Joshua couldn’t find the strength to move his gaze until Mr. Hong’s flickered in his direction. Two deep eyes bore into his soul, and Joshua immediately turned his gaze, reaching back for the water bottle. He knew his father was heading to start the conference in just a few minutes, and the icy, no-contact they’ve had for a month thus far would have to melt away as if it were never there in the first place. 

Joshua felt glass in his throat as he exhaled, raking a hand through his hair. 

“It’ll probably be starting in a bit,” Seungcheol said. “I should go make sure everything is in order on my end.” He started towards the door, but immediately stopped and turned back to Joshua, who was staring intensely at the water bottle in his hand as if it had the power to calm all of the nerves that suddenly kicked into gear. “Hey.” Joshua turned his head. Seungcheol peered down the hall he was heading in. “He should’ve gotten this a long fucking time ago, and you could’ve been a lot harsher. You got this.” 

Joshua nodded his head, and with a small nod, Seungcheol disappeared down the hall. Turning to his ramen, Joshua finally brought it to his lips, opening the cap and taking a long slurp of noodles into his mouth. 

The next fifteen minutes after stuffing his face with ramen went in a blur, and Joshua silently followed Junhui through the hallways to where the conference was being held. He could hear the sound of snapping cameras and the muffled voice of his father getting clearer and clearer. 

When he heard his father’s voice say ‘This was something we discussed heavily, and with a lot of consideration for both parties…” Joshua stopped in his tracks, only catching Junhui’s attention when he tugged at his suit jacket.

“I can’t do it.”

“Can’t do it?” Junhui asked. “Hyung, of course you can. You’ll be just fine.”

“No, I really can’t. I don’t…. I actually don’t think I can.” Joshua turned to the stage, catching glimpses of flashing cameras just a few more paces away. “Once it’s done, it’s done. There’s no going back from this….”

Junhui frowned, his features soft. “Isn’t that what you want?” 

Joshua was silent for a moment, his mind focusing on the deep, heavy voice of his father just outside. After a second to think, he nodded. “Yeah, but-.”

“Then you won’t be able to if you don’t do it. You’ll just prove to your father that he was right and you can’t stick up for yourself. I won’t solve anything.”

Joshua sighed, closing his eyes. “Right,” he said. “Right, what the hell am I talking about? This is ridiculous…” he fixed his suit collar, running his hands through his hair in hopes of easing their shaking. “Okay.” 

“With all of that to say, I want to welcome my son, Hong Jisoo-.” Joshua inhaled, biting the inside of his lip. “To address any questions and give more insight into the matter.” 

Joshua saw his father turn his head, a smile on his face as he welcomed his son out to applause. Just past that curtain was a string of press, cameras, and rampant questions that Joshua never thought he’d have the chance to answer.

Joshua stared his father’s phony smile in the face as he strode onto the stage, nodding his head politely before approaching the podium. The first few flashes of the cameras made him flinch as he looked out into the crowd. He caught a glimpse of the reporters and cameramen, of curious investors in the company. People who would get a major advantage in the business just by being in the room to see this. He saw Namjoo sitting beside her father, both of them silent as Namjoo’s eyes locked on him. He inhaled, looking up to where Seungcheol was stationed by one of the doors. He was peering out the window, and Joshua saw how his eyes were slightly wide, his hand motioning someone over. Joshua couldn’t help but watch as a large, oversized figure rushed into view, drenched in sweat and doubled over. 

Jesus. Joshua thought to himself. In that moment, he felt all of the nerves, the glass in his throat, the piercing sense of dread poof away. His body felt light, and he suddenly felt the need to spill everything.

When Mingyu stood up straight and looked at the podium, he broke into a grin and waved. Joshua only acknowledged him with a nod before turning his head to the audience once again and finally beginning to speak.

----------------

Joshua felt as if a gust of wind had slammed past him as he staggered off the stage, the sound of cameras and overlapping chatter becoming duller and more muddied as it continued on. Junhui had immediately left to get him some water, and he was alone for a moment. He pressed his hand against the wall, lowering his head and taking several deep, much-needed breaths of relief. 

His father had not returned after they both left the podium; only an awkwardly fake handshake and a required smile for press photos, and he was heading away with Mr. Park and his wife by his side. Joshua didn’t even want to think about it. 

“Oppaaaa!” Joshua looked up, eyes wide as Namjoo suddenly appeared at the door, her hair mostly flyaways out of a messy bun. She grinned, hurrying over to Joshua. “You did amazing!”

“You think?” Joshua asked curiously, his head still feeling a bit heavy. “I can’t even remember what I said.”

“No, you did so well. You really kept it professional up there. I think everyone was impressed. My father was.” She smiled, and Joshua met it. She sighed. “Now it’s over,” she said gently. “You don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

Joshua nodded his head. “I know,” he said. Namjoo suddenly reached out, pulling him into a tight hug. It startled Joshua, but only for a moment, before he immediately locked his arms around her and hugged her back. “I’m sorry. I was the worst.”

“You really weren’t,” she admitted. “I’m just happy you don’t have to hide anymore…” Joshua hummed, nodding his head in agreement. “And I still expect to be invited over. I need to know how your love life is. Ten years of entertainment gone like this.” She snapped her fingers, and Joshua dipped his head to laugh. 

“Of course,” he said. “You’re welcome over anytime.”

As the duo continued talking, another figure came into the room, lingering by the door so as not to disturb the friends. But after a few minutes, their cough alerted them both, and Joshua turned to see Mingyu awkwardly shuffling at the archway. 

“Hey,” he said gently.

Namjoo knew it was her time to go, turning back to Joshua. “Call me soon, okay? When things are settled.” Joshua nodded, and Namjoo offered one more tight hug before waving Mingyu off and heading outside, where Minghao was waiting with a polite nod to the couple. He offered Mingyu a thumbs-up before leading Namjoo away. 

Mingyu and Joshua were alone in the backroom. Junhui still hadn’t returned, and at this point, he might have had the right idea to keep his distance for a bit longer. Joshua exhaled, resting against the wall as Mingyu approached. 

“Hey.” Mingyu seemed softer now. Like he had a feeling he shouldn’t be here. It was cute. 

“Hey.” He said. “How’d the school thing go?”

“I rescheduled.”

Joshua pouted. “Mingyu-.”

“I told them I’d come first thing tomorrow morning. That I had something important to be at. I tried to stay, I really did. Especially when you sent that picture of that delicious ramen-.”

“It was.”

Mingyu smiled in amusement. “But I couldn’t stop thinking about being here in case you needed me.” His cheeks tinted red. “But it turns out you didn’t really. You did great.”

Joshua looked away for a moment, puckering his lips in thought. After a moment, he pushed off the wall and walked to Mingyu, closing the distance. “Well… I’m glad you came, I guess,” he flicked at MIngyu’s shirt. “Because I am ready to go home.” 

Mingyu blinked, looking down at him. “Are you… Are you hitting on me?”

Joshua chuckled, his nose crinkling in amusement. “Maybe I am. Is that a problem?”

“Uh, no.” Mingyu insisted. “There isn’t.” Joshua chuckled, his hands reaching around to hang loosely on Mingyu’s waist. He saw the younger look around, before his own hands settled similarly on Joshua’s waist. “People might see.”

“Mm…” Joshua leaned against him fully. “I honestly don’t fucking care,” he said simply, resting his chin onto Mingyu’s chest to look up at him. Mingyu looked down and smiled, dipping his head down to press a kiss to Joshua’s forehead. Joshua sighed, closing his eyes. 

For a moment, Joshua allowed himself to time-travel back months. Standing alone at Waterbomb, jetlagged yet on a mission to piss his father off in the best way he knew how: balancing on the tight rope of respectable heir Jisoo and free, happy Joshua. He thought about the music blasting and the lights flashing, the smell of alcohol, and people with the same goal as him: to be free. To be happy and enjoy themselves. 

Joshua felt something surge in his chest when Mingyu flashed into view, tall, dark, and incredibly handsome. Walking around like he knew he was hot shit and could get whoever he wanted, yet he chose to approach Joshua. It felt like a lifetime ago, the longer he thought about it. 

Opening his eyes, Joshua looked up at Mingyu, who seemingly had no problem raking a patient hand through Joshua’s hair while he waited for his body to reboot. 

“Okay…” he breathed. “Let’s go. Take me home, Mingyu.” He stood up straight, running a hand through his hair. Mingyu nodded, reaching out to take his hand and interlock their fingers, tugging Joshua close to his side. 

“You’re so forward, Hyung.” Mingyu teased, kissing the back of his hand as they began to walk. His fingers felt the same as that night, heavy and firm on his own as he kept him close the entire night. How safe and warm Joshua feels after only a few hours of knowing him. As the pair headed out of the building, talking of evening plans together, Joshua knew that the only thing he ever wanted to do was be open, be free, be with Mingyu. The rest of the world be damned. 

“Are you done?” 

Mingyu sniffled, wiping his eyes as he looked up at the newspaper crinkling at the corners. He gulped, hiccupping a few times before nodding his head. “Yes, Sir…” he choked out.

Mr. Kim set his newspaper on his lap, bringing his reading glasses with it as he stared down at his teary-eyed son. “Now, why are you so upset?” 

Mingyu wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt, running a hand through his hair. “Do you want to love someone again?” 

His father barely seemed taken aback by the question, only tilting his head. “That’s what made you hysterical today? Why do you ask?”

“Well…” Mingyu shifted. “Be-because when Minyoungie and I get married and move out, you’ll be all alone in the house.” 

Mr. Kim snorted, covering his mouth to laugh. 

“Appa!” Mingyu gasped, eyes widening at his father’s response. 

“Mingyu, you’re barely a teenager. What on earth are you worrying about marriage for?” 

Mingyu pursed his lips together. “I like someone at school.”

Now, his father became serious again. “Oh, do you?”

“Mm…” He sniffled. “And I told him before I came home today, after club practice.” 

“Do you think this person will be the one you marry?” His father asked. “Is that the problem?”

Mingyu sniffled. “I don’t know, but…” he sniffled. “If he says yes, I won’t be home, and you’ll be alone, I don’t know…” he sniffled. “I don’t know what to do.” He hiccupped, covering his face to cry. 

“Mingyu-.” Mr. Kim sighed, and the room fell silent again, minus Mingyu’s second wave of tears. It took another two minutes for Mingyu to calm down, and another, softer: “Are you done, now?” came from the couch. Mingyu nodded. “Mingyu, if you already told him your feelings, then there’s nothing that can be done. You did what you thought was right. I’ll be alright.” 

“Appa-.”

“Do you like him?” Mingyu sniffled, nodding his head. “Okay, then. If you really like someone a lot, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. Not even me. I’m an adult, you know, I’ll be just fine.” Mingyu sniffled, wiping his eyes. Mr. Kim reached the end table and passed over a tissue. “Allow yourself to be a little selfish this time, Mingyu.”

Mingyu opened his eyes, which were still locked in the direction of the tombstone. His father’s name was almost staring back at him, as it had been for the past four hours. He groaned, running a hand through his hair as his bones started coming back to life with each movement. “I must have fallen asleep…” he murmured to himself. “Damn. How long has it been?”

His stomach growling was a sign enough that Mingyu had been sitting there long enough. He sighed, finally standing to his feet and checking the time on his phone. “I should see about getting something to eat,” he mumbled to himself. He looked down at his father’s tombstone one more time. “I’ll be back in a few days, Dad,” he said, nodding his head. For a moment, he let it hang there, running a hand along his face. “I wish you were here right now, Dad. I don’t know how much longer I can give myself advice,” he chuckled.

Just as the wind blew through the trees, Mingyu heard a faint. “-Gyu!”

Mingyu’s head snapped up, looking around. Nobody was there; it was pretty low foot traffic this early in the morning. “...Gyu!” He heard again, a bit louder this time. He looked down at the tombstone at his feet. 

“...D-dad?” he arched an eyebrow. He scanned the vicinity, his brain trying to decide how he was going to react to the possibility of ghosts. But then, he heard the voice again, this time much clearer. And much worse.

“Kim Mingyu!”

Mingyu’s head whipped around, looking down the dirt path just in time to see a familiar head of black hair and sharp, angry eyes. His breath caught in his throat as he watched Joshua heading straight for him. 

“Hyung,” he breathed, teeth sinking into his bottom lip. If any moment in his life was the one to run for the hills, this would be it. But he just couldn’t. He watched as Joshua tugged down his mask as he continued his way over, and Mingyu realized that it had felt like a lifetime away from Joshua in just a week and a half. He had to scan Joshua from head to toe to make sure he was even looking at the right guy, his hair had gotten a bit longer after all. But nobody’s eyes got that large and adorable when they were angry. So, despite every other body part telling him to book it while he still could, his feet stayed firmly planted in place. 

As Joshua closed the distance between them, he spoke again. “Why you-.” His hand recoiled back, over his head. Mingyu inhaled a deep breath, turning his head just a bit and closing his eyes shut. He didn’t expect to hurt, not physically at least. So he just braced for impact. 

But it never came.

Mingyu didn’t open his eyes until he heard a broken gasp of breath across from him, hesitantly looking up at the hand raised and frozen above them. When his eyes fell to Joshua’s face, he was still catching his breath. The whites of his eyes were blotchy and red, struggling to hold back tears that had probably been spilling for days. It broke Mingyu’s heart. “Hyung.” 

“Don’t fucking ‘hyung’ me.” Joshua snapped, eyes narrowing. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Mingyu stepped closer. “Why are you here? You shouldn’t be here…”

“Why? I came here looking for you so you can explain yourself!” Joshua snapped. He noticed Mingyu flinch, taking a small step back, but the look on his face was still hard and cold. 

Mingyu’s heart was heavy as he turned to look at his father’s tombstone. “I know,” he said. “I’ve been coming here for the last three days trying to get some advice.” He chuckled, dry and painful. “I’m starting to think I made the wrong decision and he’s scolding me.”

Joshua’s eyes widened. “Uh, yeah!” he said. “Of course, you made the wrong decision!” Mingyu looked over at him again. “How could you possibly have taken a blank check from my father?!” 

Mingyu had never been hit by a bus, but he figured the feeling that slammed square into his chest was close enough. The wind was fully knocked out of him, his body not feeling like his own. “What?” he asked.

“What do you mean by ‘what’?! You did it!” 

“Hyung-.”

“Listen, I know you weren’t happy with me before I left, but Jesus!” 

“No, hyung!” Mingyu stepped forward, but Joshua was still shouting at him. 

“I mean fuck, money is thrown at you once and you just…. Just..  take it?!”

“No, Hyung, please listen! I didnt-!” 

“Did you even think about it for more than two seconds?! Was it at least a hard decision?!”

“Of course it was!” Mingyu shouted, and the duo finally fell quiet. Mingyu inhaled. “But I didn’t take the check.”

Joshua looked like a deer in headlights, eyes widening well beyond normal capacity.  He staggered back a few paces, face paling. “What…..?” He whispered. Mingyu nodded.

“I didn’t take the money, Hyung,” he repeated, softer this time. As Mingyu watched Joshua try to comprehend what he was told, he began explaining. “He offered it to me, yes. And for a minute, I thought about what my life would look like with whatever amount of money I could picture. But I couldn’t…”

Mingyu gripped the blank check in his hands, eyes cast back up to Mr. Hong. He was attempting to look patient, but it was clear he wanted a decision made. He didn’t expect that it would take Mingyu this long. He exhaled.

“Sir, thank you so much.” He said, and the corner of Mr. Hong’s lips turned into a pleased smile. Looking back down at the check, Mingyu took a second to imagine the biggest number he could write down on it. The house it would’ve gotten him and the college degree that would be hanging over his desk. It was nice for a moment, but it tore in half right with the check in his hands. 

“What the hell are you doing?!” Mr. Hong shouted, eyes narrowing. Mingyu stood up. “Kim Mingyu!”

“I can’t accept that check,” he said. “I can’t put a price on your son as easily as you can. I care about him…” He rounded the couch, turning to look at the photos of Joshua and him scattered along the table. His heart ached; he could feel his throat tightening. But he looked over at Mr. Hong one more time. “Thank you for everything.”

“You’re an idiot. A fool, making the biggest mistake of your life!”

“I appreciate that,” Mingyu said simply. 

“Don’t think that because you’re refusing the money, I’ll let you see my son! By making this decision, you’re leaving this room with nothing. Do you understand me?! No job, no money, nothing!” 

Mingyu swallowed every curse word he wanted to fling at Mr. Hong deep into his chest, simply nodding in understanding. “I’ll have my formal resignation letter on your desk in the morning.” And with one final bow, Mingyu started out the door. 

Mingyu looked down at his feet, kicking a pebble a few paces away. Joshua still didn’t speak, still totally stunned by what he said. When he finally looked up, Joshua wasn’t looking at him. “Did you really think I would take the money over you?”

“Wha- I-.” Joshua stammered, eyes wide and pupils shaking, before he finally caught Mingyu’s gaze. “You didn’t…. You just disappeared. You’re not answering my calls. What the hell else was I supposed to think? I went to your apartment, and it was empty. Your locker was cleaned out, and nobody knew where you went!”

“I couldn’t handle seeing you again. I didn’t know how you’d react!”

“Well, now you know!” Joshua motioned to himself. 

Mingyu shifted. He felt awkward, small, like he wanted to run away. He didn’t want this to happen; he just wanted to mourn what he lost alone. Let it die at the foot of the Hong building. He couldn’t bear seeing Joshua this angry, this hurt. Because of him. He finally sighed. “I’m sorry..” he breathed. “I was in such a fog, I didn’t know what to do…”

Joshua ran a hand through his hair, tilting his head back to the sky as he tried to collect himself. Mingyu could barely watch him, his eyes darting from side to side, up and down, closing and opening as he tried to desperately find a way to end this. “Hyung,” he finally choked out, eyes settling at Joshua’s feet. They shifted a bit in the dirt. “I told you I would stop this when my job was at risk…” he said softly. “And now I lost it. And I’m sure any job I could ever possibly get in Seoul.” He inhaled. 

“So?” Joshua breathed. “What the hell does that have to do with me?” he asked. “With u- with this?”

Mingyu looked up at him. “Because how on earth are we supposed to continue this-.” he motioned between them. “Now?!” Joshua flinched a bit. “We’ll never be able to do any of this properly. We could barely manage before, in the limits we had to set for ourselves. What on earth are we supposed to do now, when your fathers are going to be even more down your neck?” His own eyes began to sting, but he was able to swallow them down, blink them back. “I’m sorry if what I said to your father caused you more trouble, but I don’t know how else we could possibly-.”

“I love you.”

Mingyu’s entire body recoiled at the words. No. This must be what it felt like to be hit by a bus. Unable to move, stunned by what you think just happened. 

“...What?” He whispered. Joshua didn’t seem so sure himself, so he opened his mouth to try again.

“Ming-.” Joshua groaned, eyebrows furrowed together as he seemed to try desperately to figure out what to say next.  “Mingyu, everything I have to my name is only there because of my name. My money, my job, my connections, everything. If I leave my family I have nothing. I have no one-.” Joshua’s voice cracked at the last word, covering his mouth and looking away. Mingyu inhaled, watching silent as he tried to collect himself. “I have no one else…” He sniffled. “Other than you. I need you.”

The words buried themselves deep in Mingyu’s bones. I love you, I need you. Words Joshua expressed in movements, in jabs, in looks across the room. Never in words. Mingyu knew no matter how long this lasted, he may never get the opportunity to hear those words spoken. And here it was, laid out in front of him before the one person he wished to introduce Joshua to for so long. 

“I can’t possibly do enough to take care of you the way you deserve,” Mingyu whispered. Joshua studied him. 

“...Mingyu, you’re the only person who ever really did treat me ‘the way I deserve.’ He assured, his voice soft. Mingyu gulped. “I can live in a shoe box for the rest of my life, and never go on another fancy vacation again. Hell, I’ll work for a living, like actually.” He rolled his eyes at the thought. “But I won’t leave here without you with me.” 

Mingyu felt his throat close, and he looked back down at his feet, biting the smile forming on his lips. He knew where Joshua was coming from. He could have lived a thousand lives, made millions of dollars, lived in every major city in the world and eaten the most expensive foods. He could work 50 minimum wage jobs, barely scrape by, and live in a shoebox until he died. Either side of the spectrum, however, would be meaningless without Joshua there. 

“...I love you too, Hyung.” He finally said softly. 

Wide, brown eyes snapped up in Mingyu’s direction. He seemed just as surprised to hear the words back as he did saying them himself. And that was when the dam started to crack. Joshua tried so desperately to hold back tears, starting to panic when he realized he was losing the battle this time. He turned his head, his breaths quickening. Mingyu stepped forward a few paces, but he stepped back to leave distance. 

“That… you took too long saying that…” Joshua murmured, his voice wavering a bit. Mingyu smiled. His cheeks were red, the blush spreading over his nose and to the very tips of his ears. He looked like a little boy being caught pulling his crush’s hair on the playground, lips in a pout and eyes glossy with tears. “Unbelievable.” Joshua choked out, the inside of his wrist immediately lifting to wipe at his eyes. “I cannot believe you.”

“What?” Mingyu asked in confusion. Joshua didn’t speak for a minute, turning his head when a sob threatened to escape the back of his throat. His shoulders tensed, almost scared of the repercussions. “Hyung-?”

“You’re making me cry in front of your father,” he hiccupped. “He must think… I’m so pathetic…”

Mingyu looked down at the tombstone, brushing his hand along the top of the cool marble. When he looked up, Joshua’s hands were still up by his eyes, frantically wiping at them in hopes of stopping the tidal wave already slipping down his cheeks. In an instance, Mingyu stepped closer, and before Joshua could protest, he wrapped his arms around him, tugging Joshua into his chest. “H-hey!” Joshua gasped in surprise, hands pressed firmly between both of them. When he went to tilt his head back, Mingyu gently pushed it back against his chest, allowing his fingers to tangle in his hair.

“He can’t see now,” Mingyu said. “So, if you need to cry….” 

It was silent for a long minute, but Mingyu didn’t move. One hand tightened on Joshua’s waist, the other gently running through his hair. He felt Josuha’s shaky, unsure breaths through his shirt. But he still didn’t move. And finally, when he felt the dam fully break, he rested his chin on top of Joshua’s head, holding him tight as the flood gates finally burst open. 

----------------

Joshua had gotten a hotel close by, with large arching windows spanning one wall, a massive L-shaped couch in front of a massive TV, and two whole bedrooms branching deeper inside. Mingyu walked towards the couch, pressing his hands against the plush white fabric. 

“This is incredible.” He breathed. The front door behind him shut and locked, and Mingyu turned to see Joshua standing in front of it. He’d been quiet the entire trip back to the hotel. Mingyu couldn’t really blame him; he’d clearly been in fight or flight mode for days and then finally broke down for 20 minutes. Joshua shifted by the door, fiddling with the lock repeatedly. His eyes were red and blotchy, but still soft and stunning. His cheeks were tear-stained, but he still looked flawless. He really was an angel. His eyes lifted to the light, and he watched as the living room dimmed to a soft darkness. Just enough for the two to still see one another as they moved.

Mingyu moved first, crossing the living room once again and meeting Joshua at the main hallway. He reached up, brushing his hand along Joshua’s cheeks and under his eyes to make sure there were no fresh tears. Joshua wiggled his face away, still clearly embarrassed about the whole thing. “Hey…” Mingyu said softly, guiding Joshua to face him again. Mingyu let his hand settle at Joshua’s jaw, cradling him gently as he leaned in to kiss him. The breath Joshua let out between them was soft, shaky, and almost unsure, but he still met Mingyu in the kiss. 

They stood there for just a minute, holding and kissing one another as the dark enveloped them. It was just them, for as long as they wanted. Mingyu was the first to move, gently pulling Joshua deeper into the hotel room. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure where he was going, still too unfamiliar with the layout in the dark, but he just moved until he couldn’t anymore. Each step forward led to tighter grips, harder kisses, and Mingyu just kind of wanted to put Joshua somewhere. 

Joshua pulled away when he hit something, looking over his shoulder to where the kitchen island was. That would do. Grabbing Joshua’s waist, he hoisted him up and settled him right on the edge. Joshua looked down, and Mingyu slotted himself between Joshua’s legs, holding him gently at his thighs as he leaned in to kiss him again. Legs locked around his waist, Mingyu all but moaned at the tug forward, before the duo was kissing again. Mingyu’s fingers curled into Joshua’s leg, and the other reached up to tug at the nape of Joshua’s neck. 

It took a few minutes, but Joshua began settling into his usual, playful routine. His legs tightened around Mingyu’s waist, and he swiped his tongue along Mingyu’s lip, all but humming at the eager invitation. 

“God, I missed this.” Mingyu breathed when his chest felt extremely tight. Joshua’s head dropped, pressing against Mingyu’s forehead. His hand snaked down, hiking up Mingyu’s shirt. “I missed you. Like crazy.”

Joshua stilled, one hand fisting in Mingyu’s shirt. He could feel it shaking a bit through the fabric. “You’re the one who left…” he said softly. Mingyu could sense the bite in the words, but it was horribly dulled by pure exhaustion. Mingyu pursed his lips together.

“I know,” Mingyu said softly. “I’m sorry.” Joshua shook his head.

“Did I hurt you that much?” Mingyu bit into his lip.

“It doesn’t matter now.” 

“Yes, it does,” Joshua whispered softly. Mingyu could still make out the uncertainty in his eyes, his pupils practically shaking as they looked at him. Mingyu tugged Joshua closer by the nape of his neck, their breaths mingling together. Joshua’s arm draped over Mingyu’s shoulder, the other on the hem of his shirt stopping its hike up just enough so the cool air could tickle Mingyu’s stomach. He leaned forward to press a reassuring kiss just under Joshua’s jaw. “I’m so sorry,” Joshua whispered, his breath shaky on Mingyu’s face. “Just please don’t leave me again…”

“I won’t ever do it again,” he assured. “I promise.” 

Joshua’s exhale sounded closer to a sob, but Mingyu knew better than to let it linger. His hands hung loose around Joshua’s waist, and he knocked their noses together. “Which room are you sleeping in?”

Joshua’s eyes closed, taking in the warmth around them. “Bold assumption that I’ve even been sleeping.”

Mingyu smiled sadly. “That makes two of us, then.” He lifted Joshua up, head tilting back to look at him. His legs tightened at Mingyu’s waist, heels digging into his back. “Then let’s just see where we end up.” And Joshua nodded in agreement, before diving back in for another kiss. 

Since Mingyu didn’t fully know where he was going, he navigated his path by lowering his lips to Joshua’s shoulder and neck, pressing kisses against the skin as they moved. Joshua’s hand raked through his hair. When his legs reached the bed, he lay Joshua back, pressing his hands on either side of his head. Joshua’s breaths were labored, mouth was parted slightly.

-explicit version on a03-

—---------- 

For the first time since they’d been together, Joshua didn’t watch Mingyu slide off of him or tie and toss the condom. He didn’t roll over and make a snide comment or pull him back down for more. He just stared at the ceiling, his heart pounding in his ears as his chest rose and fell like a tidal wave, deciding if it was ready to crash yet. His body felt boneless, exhausted. He’d forgotten how to move. But anything other than the numbness that sat in his bones these past three days was a better feeling at this point, even the soreness he knew was waiting for him to move.

No matter how much commotion he heard around him, he just couldn’t bring himself to turn his head and look, even though he couldn’t handle the thought of Mingyu being out of his sight for more than a few seconds. But it was as if he was floating above the bed, watching the pair from above, and Joshua was desperately trying to find himself and return him home so he could move again.

“Hey.” Mingyu made the bed shift, crawling in beside him, but even then Joshua continued to stare at the ceiling. Mingyu leaned over him. “Are you okay?” 

“Yes…” he said softly. “I think so…” 

“Did I hurt you?”

“No…” he said breathlessly, mustering enough energy to briefly close his eyes. Mingyu leaned further into Joshua’s view, and that worked to calm his body, his pupil flickering over to the muscular male over him with his eyebrows furrowed. 

“Okay… just take it easy…” he whispered, reaching forward and gently putting his hand in Joshua’s hair. The touch rebooted Joshua’s body, and with one quick inhale in, he felt his being slam right back into himself. He was here, in his hotel, with Mingyu. It was ok… A few blinks, and he felt his eyes sting again, but he blinked them away with a shaky breath of air. “Hey, easy… you’re okay.” Joshua sniffled, cursing under his breath as he tried to wipe his eyes, but the more he tried, the more he was left with tear-soaked fingers. “You seem like you need some sleep,” Mingyu said softly. The bed shifted as Mingyu moved. “Here. Lemme get something to clean-.” 

A burst of energy as Joshua’s arm stuck out. “No, I’m fine.” Joshua’s hand locked around one of Mingyu’s wrists. Mingyu seemed hesitant, leaning in to press a kiss to his forehead. “I’ll be right back. There are tissues right there.” He pointed to the dresser at the end of the table. Joshua’s head lolled to the side, watching as Mingyu jogged over to grab the box. He returned and sat on the bed before cleaning the pair up. Joshua exhaled at the soft touch, nestling into the pillow. There were a few of the kiss-bitten marks he’d left in the few rounds they’d done. A hand moved, lightly brushing against one. When Mingyu leaned into the touch, Joshua exhaled. 

“I still think you should sleep,” Mingyu whispered as he tossed the tissues to the side. “We both should.”

“Don’t want to…” Joshua whispered back. Mingyu smiled softly down at him. 

“I thought you hadn’t been sleeping.”

“Why start now?”

“Okay, fine…”

The duo lay there for a moment, neither speaking as they finished coming down from their highs. Joshua’s eyes fell back to the ceiling, tracing the intricate designs that came through in the dark. Mingyu groaned, stretching his hands up in front of him. Joshua watched as he moved one hand in Joshua’s direction, the back of his palm and fingers splayed out. Joshua hesitated, but slid his hand up along Mingyu’s arm until they were entangled together at the fingers. 

“Hyung…” Mingyu murmured into the quiet. Joshua hummed, eyes still glued to their interlocked hands. “I’m glad you came to find me…”

“Yeah?”

“Mm. I was trying to deal with the fact I’d never see you again….” he inhaled. “And it hurt so fucking much.”

Joshua nodded. “Me too…” He said softly. “I didn’t think you’d want to see me, though.”

Mingyu chuckled. “I’m too weak when it comes to you,” he said, rolling on his side to glance at him. Joshua did the same, pillowing his cheek on Mingyu’s extended arm. Mingyu looked over his features, his free hand gently rubbing along Joshua’s cheek. “Remember when we went to visit my father together? When it rained?” 

“I do,” Joshua said. 

“When I came back with the car, I saw you come out from the awning and put something on his grave.” Joshua looked over at Mingyu as he spoke. “And pay your respects. When you thought nobody was watching.”

“Oh?” Joshua felt his cheeks tint pink. “And you let me stand out in the cold rain to watch?”

Mingyu laughed. “Sorry. I didn’t want to disturb you.” His hand stopped on Joshua’s cheek, moving to rub his shoulder. “Besides, I came to a realization then.”

“And what was that?”

“That even you have a heart sometimes.” Mingyu giggled, which turned into a full-blown laugh when Joshua swatted at his shoulder. “No, really. Seeing you make such an effort, when you didn’t have to-.”

“I did.” Joshua cut in, and he felt something in his chest flutter. 

“...Well, I realized then… that I had fallen in love with you.” 

Something in Joshua’s chest short-circuited, and he stared across the bed. His heart felt like it did a backflip in his chest, and he coughed into his hand. “Really?” he asked. Mingyu nodded. “...It took you that long?”

Joshua finally felt a smile form on his face when Mingyu’s eyes widened at the second half of the comment, propping his head up a bit. “What is that supposed to mean?!”

“Use your head, Mingyu,” Joshua said, reaching out to flick his forehead. “It means I clearly loved you much longer than you loved me,” he shrugged, feeling the confidence refill his body with every new breath of life he took. “Shocker…”

“Wh-When did you realize you were in love with me?!”

Joshua hummed, resting on his back again. He lay contemplative for a minute before speaking: “I think it was when you gave me your jacket to stay dry from the rain and went to get the car.”

Mingyu let out a pathetic whine, one that finally had Joshua let out the amused laugh he didn’t know was sitting in his chest. “Hyung, are you serious!?”

“What?!”

“That was barely fifteen minutes earlier than mine!” 

“My point still stands! I loved you first.” Mingyu huffed, falling back on the bed with a thud. He rolled on his side, back facing Joshua. “Are you seriously being a sore loser?” Mingyu huffed, dramatically crossing his arms over his chest. Joshua sat up, looking over at Mingyu’s face. “Wha- hey! You’re not asleep!” He said, swatting at Mingyu’s shoulder when he heard fake snoring. Mingyu chuckled, rolling back on his side and pinning Joshua under him. Joshua looked at their hands, laced together and pinned on either side of his head. 

“Maybe I’m remembering wrong,” Mingyu said, leaning down to kiss him. “I loved you…. Mmm…. when you bought me ChaeChaeGo after my training.”

“I loved you when you….” Joshua paused for a second, his eyes falling to Mingyu’s bicep. He untangled one of his hands, brushing it against the faint scar left behind from what felt like months ago. “When you got this, just to protect me.” His eyes flickered back up to Mingyu. He watched the others’ eyes sparkle at the softness in Joshua’s voice. 

“That’s not fair…” he whispered softly. “Anyone would have done that….” 

“But they didn’t.”

Mingyu’s head fell forward, groaning. “Damn it.” 

Joshua smiled, reaching up to thread a hand through his hair. “Just admit you’re a sore loser, Mingyu, it’s alright.” He batted his eyelashes playfully when Mingyu looked back at him. “I’ll still love you. Just first.”

“Do you really mean that?” Mingyu asked, his face still painfully sweet and riding the high of Joshua’s gentle words. But Joshua also saw the uncertainty lingering nearby, the hope that this time, Joshua’s feelings really were pure.

“Yeah,” he admitted. “I do.”

“Okay…” Mingyu hummed. Joshua nodded, lifting one of his hands up to wrap around the back of Mingyu’s neck. He gently pulled him down, tilting his head to plant another kiss right on his lips. Mingyu settled above him, his own hands clinging wherever they could find space. 

“And I said it first, too.” Joshua made sure to emphasize, trialing a finger along Mingyu’s neck to press against one of those faint little nibbles. “So you’re really trailing behind. Tsk tsk.” Mingyu hummed into the kiss, grinning on his lips as he pulled back, sitting on his heels and beaming. Joshua sat up on his elbows as well, arching an eyebrow.

“Well, what I lacked in speed I’ll simply make up for in volume.” He tilted his head back, cupping his hands over his mouth. “I-!”

“Shh!” Joshua shot up, his hands pressing against Mingyu’s canine-filled grin. “You idiot, do you know how late it is!?”

Mingyu tilted his head, eyes sparkling in amusement. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you get this flustered.” He admitted. “Fine. I’ll simply declare my undying love for you in the morning.”

Joshua exhaled, resting back on his elbows as he stared up at Mingyu, stretching as if he were preparing for some sort of marathon. And maybe he was in some ways. It made Joshua’s heart clench.

“Say it again,” he whispered. “Just softly… so only I can hear it.” Mingyu looked down, breaking into a grin. 

“I love you, Hyung.” He said, without missing a beat.

------------

Despite his insistence that Joshua needed to sleep, Mingyu was the first of the two to doze off. The monotony of playing with Joshua’s hair had lulled Mingyu to sleep; the hand now deadweight above Joshua’s head. He was snoring something fierce, deep and loud, but Joshua found comfort in the noise, knowing someone was there with him.

Joshua propped himself up on one arm, looking down at Mingyu sleeping soundly beside him. A hand reached to brush lingering hair from his face.

Mingyu shifted under him, absentmindedly licking his lips and murmuring to himself. As Joshua watched Mingyu sleep, he thought back months at this point, to a memory still so fresh in his mind he could fool himself to believe it was mere hours ago if he wanted.

Mingyu’s look of concern when he saw the cut on Joshua’s lip, giving him ointment without second thought. Lightly brushing against it until the cut was all but faded away, like Joshua was made of glass and would break if pushed too hard. If Joshua thought about it hard enough – and he certainly did at times – he could still feel Mingyu’s fingers rubbing along his bottom lip. 

I promise I’ll protect you from anyone trying to hurt you.

Joshua sighed, leaning down and pressing a kiss right on his forehead where he brushed his hair back. 

“I’ve loved you,” he breathed into the quiet. “For much longer than either of us thinks.” Mingyu hummed, his hand barreling over himself and settling on Joshua’s waist, gently laying him down and tugging him close. Joshua exhaled, finally closing his eyes and allowing himself to sleep.

----------------

Waking up this morning felt a lot easier than previously. Joshua found it much easier to open his eyes to the blaring alarm echoing through the room. He rubbed his face, sitting up to see the light streaming in from the half-open blinds. Turning to his phone, it was only nine in the morning, yet they both had slept for close to ten hours. No wonder he felt so good. A tired groan escaped his lips as he fell back on the bed, buried his head into the pillow right beside Mingyu’s chest. 

His movements must have stirred his sleeping bear next to him, because within seconds, the hand that had been running through his hair the night before started up again, blindly looking for his scalp before threading sleepily through the locks. Joshua hummed, tilting his head up to see Mingyu’s eyes half open and staring back down at him.

“Morning…” Mingyu groaned, his voice heavy with sleep.

“Mm..” Joshua acknowledged him momentarily before closing his eyes once again, tugging the blanket up to their chests. 

Mingyu shifted enough to get a better angle of his hair, his other hand settling on Joshua’s waist. When Joshua glanced back up again, he was met with a quick, soft, playful peck on the forehead. “We should get up and eat,” Mingyu said after.

“I know.” Joshua agreed.

“Don’t want to…” Mingyu added.

Joshua chuckled. “I know…” He said again. However, after a moment, Joshua pushed himself to sit up, shaking out his hair and reaching for the hotel phone. “I’ll order us something.”

“Perfect because I need to shower,” Mingyu said. Joshua pressed the phone to his ear as it rang, only turning back to Mingyu when he felt the other shift on the mattress. He sat up, pressed a kiss to Joshua’s shoulder, and started off the bed. 

“Ah, hey,” Joshua called, turning to him. Mingyu looked back before immediately crawling back onto the bed, planting another kiss on Joshua’s lips. Joshua watched him jog into the attached bathroom, smiling a bit as the receptionist finally answered the phone. 

Joshua dragged himself out of bed and into his sweats, running a hand through his hair as he went into the kitchen. He made a beeline for the coffee pot, starting up a cup and leaning against the counter. He already felt much lighter than he had the past few days, hearing the sound of the shower running in the next room, setting to rest a weight that had been lodged in his chest since he checked in. 

Mingyu was already out of the shower by the time the food had been delivered to the room, Joshua setting everything up at the table right beside the balcony. He settled into his seat, taking a long sip of coffee as Mingyu rounded the corner with a towel, shaking out his hair.

“God, that was refreshing.” Mingyu sighed. His eyes fell on the meal before him and sparkled. “Oh wow.”

Joshua smiled a bit, motioning to the spread. “I got a bit of everything, so please, help yourself.” And without any more prompting, Mingyu made his way over. Joshua tilted his head up just in time for the top of his head to meet Mingyu’s lips in a kiss. “Ah-.” He turned his head, feeling his cheeks heat up as Mingyu settled across from him. 

“This all looks so good, Hyung.” Mingyu beamed, already reaching for the stack of pancakes. Joshua leaned back, watching as Mingyu picked at each plate a little bit. “Mm…” He glanced up. “Are you going to eat?”

“I will…” he assured. Mingyu cocked an eyebrow. “I promise.”

“Are you alright?” Mingyu immediately asked. “Did you sleep ok?”

Joshua nodded. “Better than I have in three days,” he assured. “I’m just not hungry right now. I have coffee.” He motioned towards the cup in his hand, bringing it to his lips. Mingyu didn’t look convinced, but Joshua simply motioned to the meal in front of him. 

For a few minutes, the pair was quiet. Mingyu ate, and Joshua watched, occasionally turning to the view beyond their balcony as the sun continued rising over the city. It was disgustingly domestic, and Joshua was drinking every last bit of it up like the coffee in his mug. 

“Hyung.” Mingyu’s deep voice pulled his attention across the table, to an empty plate and several spreads missing a few bites. 

“What is it?” he asked.

“...How long do you plan to stay here?” Joshua’s smile faded as the question floated over the table, and he rubbed the back of his neck. “You have to go home eventually.”

“I know.” He said softly. “I know I do. I already woke up to several missed calls from my father, but Junhui assured me he would try to keep things at bay while I was here.” For a moment, he thought about what his next steps were. He’d been so focused on getting Mingyu back and fixing that problem that he didn’t realize that another, much bigger problem was looming over both of them. His eyes fell to his still-empty plate. 

“...I don’t know what I’m going to do,” he said softly. 

The silence that fell over them now was much heavier; even Mingyu had stopped eating. However, he did lift his chair up, shuffling it around the table to be closer to Joshua. A hand reached out, gently taking Joshua by the chin and turning the pair to face one another. “Do you want to go back?”

“What? To my father?” 

Mingyu nodded. “I can’t,” he said gently. “But… if you feel you need to, then I’ll support you.” Joshua sighed, leaning back in his seat.

“I… I can’t go back, not now.” He pressed his fingers together tightly on his lap, watching the tips turn red. “I wouldn’t ever be able to see you again.” 

“I know,” Mingyu said gently. 

“And I’m tired.” He said. “I’m so tired of having to deal with it all. The rules, the expectations, the blatant disregard for anything that doesn’t suit him,” he sighed. “I just want to be able to travel with my fucking passport whenever I want.” Mingyu laughed, reaching up to run his fingers through the back of Joshua’s hair. “And I want to not have to hide you in hotels and apartments for once, or look over my shoulder every day.” he looked at him. “Like in Jeju, at that souvenir shop.”

Mingyu’s next smile was sadder, but he nodded. “I saw the photos; that was where they found us.”

“Yeah, well… It was nice.” Joshua said. “Not caring about who saw us.” His chest tightened. “...But I am terrified.” 

“Terrified?” Mingyu perked up. 

“Yeah. Mingyu, I told you, my father has made it so that without him, I am nothing. Everything I have is tied to him and his company. If I just go, then everything I know, everything I am, does with it.” 

“Well, that’s not true.” Mingyu corrected. He sat up a bit straighter, eyes brighter now. “You have me.”

If you play your cards right, Mingyu will be the person right in front to catch you first. 

Joshua immediately avoided Mingyu when he felt his eyes begin to sting, nodding his head. “Yeah… that’s… that’s true.” He said softly. “I know that.” A hand came up, wrapping around Joshua and holding a tissue up to him. He took it, pressing it quickly to his eyes. 

“You’re seriously going to still be embarrassed about crying in front of me?” Mingyu asked, a light tease in his voice. Joshua huffed, turning to him as he dabbed the corners of his eyes. 

“Shut up,” he said. “I wasn’t crying, the… smell of the food was strong.”

“Oh my God, does being in love make you a bad liar?” Mingyu’s eyes widened. Joshua matched his expression, reaching out to shove him as he broke into laughter. 

“Shut up!” He stressed again, unable to hold back his smile when Mingyu’s laugh was so infectious. Mingyu leaned forward, draping his arm over Joshua’s chair and scooting his own even closer, leaving practically no room between them. Joshua glanced up at him. “I need your smarts to help me figure out what I’m going to say to him. If I’m going to do this right, it has to have zero holes.”

“I can do that,” Mingyu assured, eyes already sparkling with the thought of a mind-numbing challenge. Joshua hummed, leaning over just enough for his shoulder to collide with Mingyu’s. He reached for his coffee, taking the last sip that was just becoming warm, before setting down.

“I want to go to Los Angeles.” He said gently. His eyes flickered up again, and Mingyu was staring right back. “When all of this is done, I want to go and find my mother. My father’s held everything close to his chest, so I’ve hit nothing but dead ends. I want to be able to find her.” 

“That sounds like a great idea.” Mingyu agreed, nodding his head. “I think that’ll be really good.”

Joshua hummed. Finally, he lifted up his utensils, reaching across the table and setting a pancake onto his plate. He heard Mingyu sigh in relief at the sight.

“...Will you come with me, Mingyu?” he asked. “When the time comes?”

Mingyu was already reaching for his own plate, bringing it closer to his new seat, when he glanced back down at Joshua. A smile broke out on his face, and he nodded.

“Hyung, I’d be honored.” 

The sun was high in the sky when Joshua strolled out of his room. His head was tilted up, squinting away the sun beams as he moved through the hallway. Faint sounds of shouting and cheering could be heard from behind the house, piquing his curiosity. 

Passing the kitchen, Joshua nodded towards the chef already working diligently before stopping to bow at Joshua. It smelled like lunch would be ready soon. He reached for an orange on the counter, tugged at his hoodie, and started towards the back of the house as the cheering got louder. 

Pushing the large glass doors, Joshua blinked against the sun just as a blown-up beach ball came flying in his direction. “Ah, Sir!” 

Joshua looked up, his hand immediately lifting up to deflect the ball as it lost its momentum and rolled at his feet. He looked down at the colorful water toy resting against his feet, and looked up when the sound of something moving in the water was heard. Minghao was standing waist-deep in the water with Chan, who looked like he just gotten caught throwing a baseball into a window; wide-eyed and frozen, waiting to be scolded. Joshua sighed.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“I…” he looked down at himself. “Miss. Noh told us all to get in the water….” He pouted.

“I did,” Namjoo called from the opposite end of the pool, swimming up to the edge and lifting herself up just a bit as he rested her arms on the wet concrete. “What? It’s hot out, you expect him to stand outside in a suit all day?”

Joshua glanced back at Chan, who had moved from a face frozen in terror to one of slight pleading to stay in the water. He sighed, his lip puckering up into a smile. “I mean, I wasn’t going to scold him or anything.”

“Ah, thanks, Hyung!” Chan coughed, glancing at Junhui, who was sitting on a beach chair just nearby. “Ah, Sir.” And he dove back under the water. Joshua chuckled, kicking the beach ball back into the pool, close enough for Minghao to grab it and toss it back at Chan. 

Joshua stood by Namjoo, who had tilted her head to look up at him and was lucky enough to be blocked from the sun by his shadow. “Having fun?” he asked.

“I am on vacation after all,” she said. “Why don’t you come in?”

“I’m good.” Joshua chuckled. “Might follow Junhui’s lead and just relax in a chair.”

“You’ve been relaxing in your room since we got here.” Namjoo pointed out. “Why don’t you enjoy a little bit of this vacation before we have to go to that party?”

Joshua put his hands in the pockets of his shorts, looking around the pool. Minghao sent the ball flying to a beaming Chan. Junhui’s eyes were closed as he soaked up some sun, and Namjoo was heading towards one of the blow-up pool floaties shaped like a duck. By all means, he should hop in and enjoy himself while he has the chance, allowing himself time to relax. But he knew something was missing, uncertainty spanning an entire country for the next four days. How could anyone possibly have the energy to enjoy themselves? 

“Maybe later…” he said simply, and went to sit on an outstretched chair. He watched Namjoo study him quietly before finally swimming once again, sinking back under the water as he moved. Joshua sighed, letting his eyes close as he waited to fall back asleep.

--------------------

Joshua did end up going back to the pool, but it was long after the moon hung itself in the sky and everyone had started turning in for the night. He quietly closed the sliding doors behind him before walking to the edge of the water. He kicked his sandals off before settling on the concrete, carefully lowering his feet into the heated water of the pool. An exhale escaped his lips, head tilted back as his body warmed up at the feeling radiating off his ankles. It was nice. 

The quiet of the night overtook the space, and Joshua welcomed it without much resistance. The buzz of insects and the light lapping of the water on his ankles as he kicked them gently below the water were all the noises he needed. His eyes tracked the stars overhead, wondering if the sky looked different at this moment in Korea.

Did you have a good vacation?

It absolutely topped my trip to Gyeongbokgung as my favorite trip. 

Images of the pair tangled up in the pool just a mere week ago under the same set of stars, soaking wet and giggling in one another’s arms with nothing but time on their side. Joshua groaned, covering his face with his hands. Why was he thinking about him now?! There was absolutely nothing he could do about the situation at hand, not all the way in Japan. All he had to do was wait until he got home. 

“I figured you’d be out here.” A voice called from behind him, and he immediately turned just as Namjoo closed the door behind herself, locking it for good measure. She smiled when she saw how Joshua was staring at her, almost like he was unsure how to react to her presence. “Couldn’t sleep…” she said softly.

Joshua sighed, motioning to his side as he turned back around, glancing down at his feet distorting under the water. Namjoo walked over, pulling her cardigan around her arms as she sat down beside him and dipped her own toes in the water. “And you just happened to choose the pool of all places in this place?”

Namjoo shrugged. “Soulmate intuition, maybe,” she teased, her voice still soft. Joshua felt a smile wanting to form on his face, but even imagining one felt difficult, so he simply looked away. Namjoo hummed. “What’s wrong?” She asked curiously. “Did something happen to your father?”

“Mm…” Joshua pursed his lips together. “No… Not really? I don’t know, not this time, I guess.” He ran a hand through his hair. 

Namjoo was quiet for a minute. “Is it Mingyu?”

For some reason, hearing Namjoo of all people ask that question made his entire body feel the worst case of shivers. He gulped, leaning forward and pressing his elbows hard into his thighs, letting his hands press against his face. “Fuck.”

“I’m right.”

“I shouldn’t be talking to you about this stuff.”

“Why not?” Namjoo asked. “Is it that bad?”

“No.” He sighed. How could he have been careless enough to let it get this far? He felt sick to his stomach, Mingyu’s words that night dogpiling into his brain one after another. 

Don’t you realize how upset this makes me!? I feel like a fucking joke! Did you ever really care about me at all?!

“Hey.” Namjoo nudged him, making him look over. “If I didn’t want to be a part of this, I would have ended things in college,” she said softly. “You know that.”

“I know…” he said softly, guilty in ways he found hard to properly place. “But still.”

“Who else are you going to vent to? Nobody else has the patience.” She scooted closer, their shoulders brushing together. “Now what happened?”

Joshua looked down at the lack of space between them for a moment; his eyes remained locked on their shoulders as he spoke. “He’s upset with me because I wasn’t honest with him about my father in the beginning.”

“Oh.”

“He said he feels like a joke; like I lied and said I liked him and didn’t have any ulterior motives.”

“Did you?” Namjoo asked, despite already knowing the answer. Joshua’s eyes flickered up, nodding his head briefly. “Mmm.”

“And I think my father is starting to become more aware of what’s going on…” Namjoo’s next hum was a bit tighter, looking down at the water as he lightly kicked her feet. She knocked her ankle towards Joshua, allowing some water to lap up higher on his leg. He glanced down, chuckling a bit. 

“You should tell your father the truth.” She said. “Before he confronts you.”

“Come on.” Joshua sighed. “You know how well that will go.”

“You never know. You’re not a kid anymore; you have more experience. If you’re careful with your words, it might work.”

“Please. The second I did anything like that, I’d basically be guaranteeing a spot on the street for the rest of my life. And then what? That’s it. Despite what I like to say, I have nothing without this stupid fucking family…” 

“That’s your father talking.” She assured quickly. “He knows that just as well as you do. If you jump too far and fall, more people are waiting to catch you than you might think.” 

“That’s very profound.” Joshua teased.

“I did well in philosophy.” She remembered, smiling gently. Joshua chuckled, knocking their shoulders together. “If you play your cards right, Mingyu will be the person right in front to catch you first.”

“Tch, he’s pissed at me. I can’t even really blame him.”

“Yeah, that was kind of shitty,” Namjoo admitted. “But do you feel the same way now?”

Joshua pursed his lips together. “Maybe it’s easier to say yes.” He lifted one leg out of the water, watching as the droplets fell off his skin and back into the pool below. “Just end it all now before it gets worse.”

“Oh, please.” Namjoo scoffed. “If you were going to really pretend you didn’t care about him, you wouldn’t be sitting out here yearning like the hot lead in a drama.”

“You think I look hot?”

“Focusing more on the yearning, okay? That’s the real problem here.” 

“Then you shouldn't have added the word hot,” Joshua murmured to himself. He tilted his head back to the moon, the same one that hung over him and Mingyu for four amazing nights in Jeju, nights he would pay any amount of money to return to for just one hour. He sighed. “I don’t think I can do it. Every time I’ve tried, I’ve failed.”

Namjoo hummed, tucking some hair behind her ear. “I can always come with you,” she said softly. Joshua glanced over at her as she pulled her feet from the water, drawing them to her chest. “I can wait outside if you want, but I’ll come. For moral support. If your dad starts freaking out, I can…. I dunno… but I’ll do something.”

“‘If’ is bold, try when.” Joshua corrected. Namjoo smiled, dropping her head onto Joshua’s shoulder. He hesitated momentarily, looking down at her. “...Would you really do that for me?”

She glanced up at him and smiled. “Of course I would,” she said. “I’m pretending to be your fiancé, not your friend. That part’s real.” 

Joshua inhaled, nodding his head. He looked away, biting the bottom of his lip to pull what felt like tears prick at his eyes. The duo sat in silence for a minute, looking up at the night sky together, and for a moment, Joshua contemplated pushing all of his fears and insecurities aside and just allowing himself to keep this for the rest of his life. Play it safe and put an end to the absolute decade of stress and heartache he’d put himself and Namjoo through. 

Then he thought about how miserable they'd ultimately be. How miserable he'd be. 

“I don’t know what I’ll say to him,” Joshua whispered softly. 

“Honestly, anything you say to him will be difficult.” 

“Not my father. Mingyu.” Joshua said. “I’m more worried about that than the conversation with my father.”

“Yeah?” 

“Mm.. because if I lose Mingyu, it’ll hurt so much more…” 

----------------

Joshua would never say it out loud, but when his plane’s wheels hit the ground, he felt his fingers curl into the cushion of the arm rest. He stared out the window as the plane came to a stop on the runway, and the plane shook with the force of its landing. A week felt like seconds somehow, and now it was only a matter of time before he and Mingyu talked about what had happened. It would determine where they went from here, if anywhere at all. Joshua swallowed so hard it almost made him cough, so he reached for the last sip of a water he’d been guzzling for the past hour. 

“Jisoo.”  Joshua turned his head as Namjoo leaned closer, holding her phone in his direction. “Which one do you like better for me to post?” she scrolled through a few photos of the pair in Namjoo’s hotel room, taking selfies and mirror photos in their outfits before going to the event they were sent for. Joshua tilted his head. 

“That one,” he said, scrolling through the photo of him pretending to apply some of Namjoo’s make-up while in a tux, the mascara pen held tightly in his hand, before the next one was him swatting away at the camera. Namjoo laughed, covering her mouth.

“You’re an idiot,” she said, scrolling back to the photos in question. Joshua chuckled, pointing to a mirror with photos of them both and a selfie they had taken at the Torii gates, along with a few individual pictures. “Perfect,” she settled back into her seat. Joshua watched her for a moment, and eventually she lifted her eyes back up. “Nervous?” she asked softly.

“Tch.” His cheeks turned pink, already wanting to fling off his seatbelt. “No.” 

Namjoo smiled in amusement as her attention returned to her phone. “Right. Okay.” 

The pair deplaned to a relatively crowded airport, as to be expected, immediately pulling up their masks and following their guards through a small swarm of curious eyes wanting to get a look at the couple fresh off a romantic vacation. 

Mingyu was the one who was waiting at the car to pick them up and escort them back home; Joshua could already picture his soft smile and the canine tooth that became visible the bigger it became. A seed of excitement mixed with some anxiety planted itself in his stomach, so he dug his hands deep into the pockets of his pants. What should he do? He had to play it cool, but only for so long. How long until they were alone, until Mingyu wanted to talk? What would Joshua even say! In all of these thoughts, he never fully formulated the words he’d say. 

“Hyung? What are you doing here?”

Chan’s almost confused expression made Joshua’s pace slow, his eyes hesitantly lifting up and over the bustling pick-up line to their awaiting car. But rather than Mingyu’s soft, awkward expression, he was met with Seungcheol opening the backseat of the car.

He only offered Joshua a polite nod before speaking. “I’m picking you all up. Now-.” he motioned to Joshua. “Sir.”

“Where’s Mingyu?” Joshua blurted out before he could stop himself. He tugged his mouth down, staring daggers at Seungcheol, who simply stared back with a look of disinterest. 

“Don’t worry about that. Chan, you’ll be acting as head bodyguard for a while, okay?” he said simply. Joshua blinked, his heart feeling like it stopped completely. “Now, Sir let’s-.”

“Junhui, did you hear anything about this?!” he asked, trying and failing spectacularly to mask the panic in his voice. Junhui only shook his head, pulling out his phone to confirm the lack of texts or emails on the subject.

“No idea. I was under the impression he’d be off his time by now.” He glanced at Seungcheol. “Did he take more PTO?”

Seungcheol sighed. “Let’s just go, and it’ll be explained at the house.”

“I’m not-!” Joshua was just about to have a very public outburst when a hand pressed to his side. He turned to see Namjoo, her brows furrowed in worry. 

“Easy,” she said softly. Joshua swallowed when she gripped his arm reassuringly, and he nodded his head. 

“Alright, uhm…” he looked around, running a hand through his hair in hopes to quell the frantic thoughts in his mind for the time being. “Let’s get you a car home and-.”

“Actually, Sir…” Seungcheol began. He motioned to the car behind them, then to Minghao to open it. “Namjoo has been called to the house as well.” 

Joshua and Namjoo exchanged a confused glance. With one more reassuring squeeze, Namjoo pulled back and slipped into the waiting car with Minghao, and Joshua forced himself to do the same on wobbly legs. 

---------------

The house looked bigger than it did when Joshua left,  so he tilted his head after stepping out of the car to get a look at it, squinting into the sunlight that shone over it. The sound of a car door slamming caught his attention, and Junhui gently led him inside. He turned his head as Namjoo slipped out of her own car, Minghao right behind her. 

The walk inside was quick as Joshua rounded the living room chairs, turned down the hallway, and all but kicked the doors to his father’s office. The second the doors flew open, his body stilled, running a hand through his hair as his eyes landed on Namjoo’s parents, both of whom immediately smiled when they saw him.

“There they are.” Mrs. Noh cheered, already up and crossing the room and enveloping her future son-in-law in a hug. He inhaled, but gently hugged her back. “How was your trip?!” 

“Oh, it was good,” Joshua said breathlessly, eyes already lifting to his father, who watched from his seat. Namjoo was quick behind them, taking hold of her mother’s arm and pulling her away from Joshua. 

“Mother, please,” she said softly. Mrs. Noh only seemed confused momentarily before the two watched Joshua cross the room. He bowed to Mr. Noh, but didn’t stop moving until he was right in front of Mr. Hong’s desk. The CEO simply lifted his head up.

“You had a good trip then?” he asked curiously. “I heard good things.”

“Where is he?” He asked. Mr. Hong cocked an eyebrow. Joshua pursed his lips together, his fists opening and closing at his sides. “Mingyu.” 

With one swift motion of his hand, Mr. Hong had his assistant moving through the room, bringing a small envelope to him. “He doesn’t work here anymore.” Joshua’s breath caught in his throat, closing his eyes for a second to make sure he kept his composure. He could feel it snapping away one piece at a time like a rope pulled to tight. “Anyway, sit-.” he motioned to the couches behind him, where Namjoo had been led and smushed between her parents. “We have important things to talk about. Mr. Park, tea?”

Joshua didn’t move, simply turning his head over his shoulder. He must have moved too fast or something, because it felt as if his vision blurred. He needed to blink several times to get himself steady again, and ultimately did sit on the end of a couch. He could see Namjoo’s confusion and concern across the coffee table.

While waiting for the tea, this important thing was put on hold in favor of trip stories. Joshua looked up when Namjoo spoke, sharing some suddenly vague memory of the pair exploring the Torii Gates and the delicious food they had eaten. He couldn’t process any of it; he could have been told he wasn’t there, and he’d believe them. Mingyu didn’t work there anymore? Was it really that serious? What had happened? Weren’t they supposed to talk about it? 

Mr. Park arrived halfway into a story about Kyoto, Junhui swiftly offering to assist in passing it out, if for nothing else than to just get the conversation moving. Joshua watched the movements blur together before a hot cup was set just in front of him. He could see the steam rising, but he did not attempt to reach for it.

I thought I was supposed to give him space. I thought that would help… Joshua rubbed a hand on his face, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes. The awkward chatter around him did nothing to distract him. Only the sound of footsteps did, and Joshua glanced up to see Junhui at his side, lifting up his cup of tea.

“Tired?” he asked softly. Joshua blinked back and felt a burning in his eyes, taking the tea with a nod. 

“Yes,” he said softly. 

“Well, it seems you two were quite the talk at Mr. Koiguchi’s event.” Mr. Hong said. “He called us both to say how lovely you were.” Namjoo only half-smiled at her father, who seemed to be beaming with pride. Joshua glanced at his own father, who barely even flickered a pupil in his direction. Joshua brought the cup of tea to his lips, allowing the hot drink to coax his throat and spread through his body. “With the success of your appearance at this event, I think it’s finally time that we announce a wedding date to the public.”

The clatter of the teacup hitting the floor echoed in Joshua’s ears, and he immediately covered his mouth as tea forced its way back up his throat. His head fell forward, coughing violently into his hands in hopes of holding as much tea off the floor as possible, but the leftovers were already pooling through his slippers. His chest burned at the feeling, and his body was shaking. 

“Are you okay!?” Junhui gasped, his hand flying to pat Joshua’s back. A few more coughs as Joshua immediately sat up, wiping his red eyes and swatting Junhui away.

“F-fine, I’m fine,” he struggled through a few shaky breaths. His gaze snapped to his father, who didn’t seem to react to his son’s violent outburst. He simply waited for a response. He opened his mouth to retaliate, but another wave of something came up through his throat, mixed with air, and he immediately covered his mouth again, coughing as Junhui instructed Chan to get some water. 

“You guys can’t be serious.” She said. “Mother, no. I’m so busy with everything for the new line and just… I don’t think now is the best time.”

“Then, when will be a good time?” Her mother asked. “You only have so long to start having children, honey.” Joshua lifted his head when he heard Namjoo groan. He turned down his phone, reaching for it and pulling up his messages. He clicked open one in particular, seeing the almost week-long message still sitting at the bottom of the message chain. His fingers felt like lead as they ran along the keyboard, just ghosting over the letters he would use to type something out.

Where are you?

Why did you quit?

What’s going on? 

“Jisoo.” He looked up, fingers digging into the back of his phone. “Have some manners and put that away.”

“Manners?!” Joshua gasped. “I come home from a trip I didn’t even want to go on, and ten minutes after my feet hit the ground, you drop two major bombs on me, and I don’t have manners?!”

The room was silent, save for Mr. Hong’s sharp inhale. Joshua felt movement at his side, turning to see Namjoo sitting down. He dropped his head, covering his mouth. “Shit, sorry, that wasn’t-.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry,” she assured softly. “Just take it easy. We can figure it out.”

“I think it’s time we call this get-together to an end.” Mr. Hong finally said. “My son is clearly exhausted from the trip, seeing how he’s acting.” Joshua rolled his eyes. The Nohs were already out of their seats, Namjoo’s mother gently taking her hand.

“Let’s go, honey.”

“Wait, let me stay.” She pleaded, but she was already being led out the door. She turned to Joshua, but he simply nodded her away, trying to leave a reassuring look in his eye until the doors closed behind them. 

Joshua waited for the footsteps to disappear down the hall before finally turning back to his father, who was finally out of his seat. He gulped, feeling his feet plant firmly on the floor. “Tell me why he quit.” He said simply.

“Why do you care?” Mr. Hong asked. Joshua bit the inside of his lip. “You never struck me as the type to get close with your guards in the past. Chan will be acting as your head bodyguard until Seungcheol can find a replacement. Isn’t that enough?” His eyes flickered to the young guard, whose entire body stiffened as it fell into a ninety-degree bow. “Now….” He turned to Joshua again. “Answer my question.”

“Answer mine first.” Mr. Hong sighed, his shoulders dropping in annoyance as he reached for that same manila envelope he was given by Mr. Park. Without a word, he motioned it to his son, and already, Joshua knew what was inside. His fingers curled into the envelope, thumbs just brushing the seal open. Inside were photos of him and Mingyu over the past few months, and he only needed to see one of them strolling into the Jeju house before he closed it right back up, and his head fell forward. “Father-.”

“If you plan on saying anything that isn’t a pathetic beg for your life and your namesake, I would suggest keeping your mouth shut.” Joshua swallowed something painful in his throat as his father started to move back to his desk. “Now, your turn.” he settled back in his seat. “Answer my question. Why do you care?”

“I’m not a heartless bastard like you.” Joshua frowned.

“Oh, please." Mr. Hong scoffed. “You call my attempts to keep this family from crumbling heartless?” His hands were folded in front of him. “If anything, your constant attempts to ruin everything we have worked for are truly heartless.”

“That’s not what this is.”

“Oh? Is it different this time? Parading around with someone behind your fiancé’s back? Shamelessly flaunting whatever ridiculous fantasy you have, whatever point you think you’re proving to me?” Joshua bit his lip, looking back down at the envelope in his hands. “I mean, what do you think would happen if people were to find out you’re having an affair, multiple affairs?! How selfish can you be?!” 

“I’m not-.”

“No, you absolutely are! You’ve clearly shown no regard for Namjoo’s feelings, our company’s legacy, or your own future! You’ve continued to make a mockery of our name. You have disrespected every aspect of this company, all I have worked for, how I have raised you, and now you’re risking the public's wrath if this gets out!” Mr. Hong inhaled, tilting his head. “And it seems you pushed it too far, because you even pushed Kim Mingyu away with your selfishness.”

Joshua’s shoulders tensed at the way Mingyu’s name slipped like venom from his father’s mouth. “What?” he asked curiously. Mr. Hong pulled out his checkbook, turning it to the most recent page and motioning to Joshua. Hesitantly, he took a step forward and peered over the desk. Mr. Hong’s finger pointed right at the most recent name inscribed inside. 

“Kim Mingyu took my offer for college tuition in exchange for putting an end to your relationship.” His voice was firm, very matter-of-fact as he tapped against Mingyu’s name. His finger was dragging along the pen-written letters.

Joshua pressed the back of his hand to his mouth, avoiding his gaze momentarily as his body felt like it was being dragged into the floorboards. “That isn’t true…” he said softly. 

“No?” Mr. Hong asked. “I had him in my office right when you left for Japan, and gave him my offer. He thought about it for a moment, I’ll say, but at the end of the day, he took money over you.” He narrowed his eyes on Joshua. “So, yet again, you’ve completely ruined the future of another relatively promising talent because you were selfish. Really, you brought this entire thing on yourself. Mingyu was already at his wits' end working under you, and you dragged him further into Hell to get what you wanted.” 

He felt sick. If he were alone now, Joshua would surely throw up, but he simply swallowed the acidic bile in his throat and tried to raise his head to look at his father. “You don’t understand anything.”

“I understand what I see. And what I see is that Mingyu had just enough smarts to run while he could.” He closed the checkbook and slid it to the side of his desk. “You are sick and twisted, Jisoo. If you weren’t my only son, you’d have been disinherited a long time ago.”

“God, please.” 

“Shut up.” Mr. Hong was on his feet again, rounding the desk to close the distance between his son once again. “I should make sure you’re punished for how disobedient you’ve been yet again to me, this time to an entirely new low. But it seems you might finally learn your lesson this time.” Joshua blinked a few times, biting back his tears. “Oh God, don’t cry, it’s unbecoming. You brought this on yourself. Now.” Mr. Hong motioned to Mr. Park. “We’re going to be preparing for your wedding at the end of the month, and once the honeymoon phase is over, you’ll be fast-tracked on a path to-.”

“You say you want to keep the scandal out of the paper, yet you are speed-running a wedding? People will just whisper that Namjoo is pregnant out of wedlock rather than the CEO’s son is ga-.”

The crack of Mr. Hong’s hand rang in Joshua’s ear as his head was slapped to the side, his cheek stinging like he was put on an open flame and left there. He managed a cough in surprise, his hand flying to cover the red mark that was surely forming under his hand. He blinked back more tears, refusing to look at his father as he inhaled a deep breath. 

“I see we’ll have to discuss this when you’ve calmed down.” He said simply. “Go to your room.” 

“I’m not a child.”

“You sure do act like one.” Mr. Hong said. “Also, don’t try to leave to find Mingyu. He knows he’s not allowed to talk to you, and I expect he will follow through with it, unless he wants all of his money and future plans to go down the drain along with whatever mess he was doing with you.”

“Fuck you.”

Mr. Hong shook his head. “Go, be heartbroken out of my sight,” he pleaded, waving a hand at his son. “And come back ready to actually be an adult.”

Joshua huffed, shaking his head as he finally turned on his heel. When his eyes locked on his father’s door, Mr. Park was there to block the way. He laid a palm out, eyes falling to the manila envelope crumpling in Joshua’s shaking grip. Joshua silently placed the envelope in hands, pushing past before Mr. Park fully stepped out of the way. 

He just barely got to the door before Mr. Hong spoke again. “Junhui.” He called, and both of them turned around. Joshua glanced at his assistant, whose eyes were just about as wide as saucers. “Did you know about this?”

Shit. Joshua thought to himself. He rubbed his cheek, eyes cast to the floor.

“...Mr. Hong told me where he’d be on the off chance he needed to be picked up or was unsafe,” he said simply. “But I knew since he was with Kim Mingyu, that wasn’t an iss-.”

“Then you’re just as disappointing as my son and Kim Mingyu,” he waved. “I’ll be in contact with your father about arranging a flight home. You’ll be relieved from your duties as soon as the wedding has ceased.”

“What?!” Joshua’s eyes widened. “Father, I-.”

“Very well.” Junhui took Joshua’s arm. He turned to see Chan already holding the door open for them, his eyes also wide and a bit glassy. “I’ll take Mr. Hong to his room then…” And without another word, the pair were out the door.

----------------

Despite his room not changing in the week he was gone, it felt much emptier than it did then. Joshua walked into the room on shaky legs, his vision blurred. It felt as if he’d drunk his weight in alcohol; it felt like a more welcome alternative. 

 Joshua’s body crumpled when his hand pressed against the plush duvet on his bed, head falling forward and one broken sob escaping his lips. “What the fuck….?” he whispered. 

“Si-” Junhui was silent for a moment, but Joshua didn’t look up to see why. All he heard was Chan mumble something in agreement and step out the door before it closed and locked behind him. Footsteps approached Joshua’s side, and Junhui finally spoke again. “Hyung…”

“Shit.” Joshua’s shoulders tensed. “Junhui…”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered. “Did you think I’d tell?” Joshua shook his head. 

“No, I… fuck…” One of his hands came up to cover his eyes. “Why is this happening? He didn’t really….” 

“I’m sorry,” Junhui said softly. 

“This can’t be happening again, this fucking sucks!” A fist lifted up only to slam back down into the mattress, rocking the entire bed with its force. Joshua stood upright, his hands tangling in his hair as he paced a few steps from his bed. The end table by his couch knocked into his side and that stopped him momentarily, looking down at the sleek decoration. He scoffed, immediately kicking it down and sending its contents flying every which way. “Fuck!” He grabbed at the pillows on the couch, tossing them off into the distance as well. Each object he threw was paired with a pissed-off swear of an agonizing question he would never get answered. That angered him more as his computer chair fell to the floor and a plant in the corner fell over, sending dirt pooling around his feet. Anger blurred in his vision.

“Hyung!” Junhui shouted, reaching out to take his friend’s arms before he flung the next object in his grip, the throw blanket hanging off the corner of the couch. “Easy. Take it easy….”

Joshua looked back at his friend, his body relaxing the longer he was in Junhui’s hold. Eventually, the blanket fell from his hand and piled on top of some of the dirt. His friend pursed his lips together. “....Shit, maybe I do deserve this,” he whispered.

“No, you don’t.”

“I do. I chased him away. Last time we saw each other, he was so upset with me…” he rubbed his face, gently wiggling from Junhui’s grasp. “He basically said all the same things as my father….” Watching Mingyu’s face distort into an odd mix of hurt and embarrassment made Joshua feel his entire chest collapse in on itself. “But he wanted to talk…. Why did he take the money?” The thought of Mingyu strolling out of the building, check in hand, while Joshua was miles away, never once looking back, seared itself into Joshua’s brain. 

“He didn’t seem like that,” Junhui said. “There has to be a reason. This is your father we’re talking about.”

Joshua chuckled dryly. “I can’t blame him after how much I’ve clearly hurt him.” He looked back down at the blanket, kicking it with his foot just enough to let it pool a bit further away. “If he really wants to be done with me, fine… I want to know if it at least hurt him a little bit before he left.”

Junhui sighed, nodding his head. “Okay…. Tell me what I can do to help.” Joshua glanced at his friend, nodding his head. 

“...Sorry, I got you fired,” Joshua said softly. Finally, Junhui smiled a bit.

“Please, I’ve been looking for a way to get the hell out of this job.” Joshua clicked his tongue.

“Thanks.” He said sarcastically. “I’d say I need to get used to another assistant now, but…” he looked around at his room, half-trashed and covered in mulch. “But I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

Just then, the bedroom door clicked open. Joshua looked over, feeling his body tense. His father could be walking in, Chan, anyone. He had no idea who it would be. A weird, almost hopeful part of him thought it might be Mingyu…

Namjoo peered in, closing the door gently behind her. Wide eyes immediately scanned the carnage she walked in on, before lifting to Joshua. “...Huh… this looks familiar…” she said softly. 

Joshua’s breath hitched, and like unlocking a doorknob, he felt his throat tighten. He covered his mouth with his hand, the other trying to rub at his quickly reddening eyes as flashes of Seungcheol shaking hands with his father, offering a distant look in Joshua’s direction as he took a blank check, bowed his head, and left the office without so much as a word. He wondered if Mingyu’s situation was the same. 

When he felt two hands wrap around him, Joshua sniffled, pressing his face into Namjoo’s shoulder. One hand gently threaded his hair. 

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Namjoo said softly. Joshua chuckled, a bit brighter but still drowned in tears.

“Not if I kill him first.” He muttered, before his arms latched around her in a bone-crushing hug she was unfortunately all too familiar with. 

----------------

The whispers through the company building lowered in volume but amplified in quantity when Joshua Hong strolled through the front doors three days later. No rumors had made it out of the Hong estate, but there were still several questions circulating the company building: What made Joshua stop coming to work again, and where did Mingyu go? 

Joshua wanted to know the answer to the second question himself.

Fidgeting in his seat, Joshua drummed his fingers against the table he was sitting at. He turned his head to Byeonghwa, who was wiping down the counter on the other end of the room. “Byeonghwa, can you please bring me another water?”

He looked up, nodding his head. “Of course.” And he turned to the fridge. Joshua watched him momentarily before the click of the front door caught his attention, and he looked over. 

Seungcheol slipped in, immediately bowing as the door closed behind him. “Lock it,” Joshua said quickly, leaning back against the chair. He kicked one leg over the other. Seungcheol’s eyebrow twitched, but he locked the door and strolled further into the room. Joshua watched him, only pulling his gaze away when Byeonghwa set his drink on his table. “Thank you. You can go.” He said simply. He waited until Byeonghwa headed out the door, and Seungcheol settled in the seat across from him. “Thanks for coming.”

“Did I have a choice?” Seungcheol asked. Joshua arched an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. “...Hm. So, what did you need to see me for? I’m busier than usual. I really don’t have a lot of time.”

“What could you possibly be doing?”

“My job.” Seungcheol frowned. “But I guess you don’t fully understand what that is like, though.” Joshua scowled. “Now, what do you want?”

“...Have you heard from Mingyu?”

Seungcheol exhaled, closing his eyes for a minute. “Joshua-.”

“Don’t fucking call me that.”

“That’s a first,” Seungcheol said, cracking an eye open. Joshua narrowed his eyes, watching as Seungcheol nodded his head. “No, I haven’t. He hasn’t answered my texts since he was called in.”

“...I don’t believe you.”

“That’s not my problem, Jo… Jisoo…” 

Joshua swallowed a tight ball in his throat. “I thought he trusted you.”

Seungcheol shrugged. “Maybe he thought you’d pull some shit like this,” he said bluntly. “Trying to find out where he is.”

“And?”

“He probably doesn’t want to be found, Jisoo.” Seungcheol’s voice was gentle, despite the annoyance in his features. He watched Joshua across the table. “I told you this was going to happen. Both of you.”

“...Did you tell my father?”

“What?” Seungcheol’s body tensed, eyes widening slightly. “No.”

Joshua gulped, licking his bottom lip as he looked down at his water. “You seriously had to do this because what? Are you still jealous or something? You regret what you did in college, and so you’re trying to sabotage me? I told you I’m not interested anymore.”

“That’s not what I’m doing,” Seungcheol said.

“Then why the fuck did you get involved!?” 

“Because I actually give a fuck about Mingyu!” Seungcheol said, all gentleness in his voice gone with a hard slam of his hand on the table. The echo made Joshua jump in his chair. Seungcheol barely even winced at the impact, firm eyes focused on Joshua. “I told you that,” he said simply. “I simply told him what I knew and let him decide.”

Joshua’s eyes studied Seungcheol’s hand, watching as his palm tinted red as Seungcheol slipped his hand under the table. “I just want to know where he is.”

“Well… he didn’t tell me,” Seungcheol said. He turned his head, getting up from the table. Joshua watched as he walked towards the counter, grabbing something from behind it and walking back. Upon further inspection, a box of tissues was set in front of them, Seungcheol pulling out the first few and passing them across the table. It was only then that Joshua’s cheeks felt wet, and he immediately reached for another tissue inside the box to dab his eyes dry. “You’ve played too close to the sun for too long, this was bound to happen again.”

Joshua looked at him. “I know…” he said softly. “I don’t even care about the shit with my father….” He looked at the tissue in his hand, crumpling it in a tight fist. “I just want to know what went through Mingyu’s mind. I want to know how long it took him to make a decision…” He felt his eyes prick with tears but he immediately looked away. “I want to know if he’s still upset with me. Not knowing is killing me.” 

Seungcheol sighed, his voice dropping a few octaves. “I bet he’s thinking the same thing I was.”

Curious eyes flickered back over the table. “Which was?”

Seungcheol was quiet for a long moment, running a hand through his hair. “That it was probably the hardest decision he’s ever made, and that he’ll carry that guilt around for the rest of his life.”

Joshua inhaled. “....Well… I’d rather hear that from him. Not you.” That comment finally earned a chuckle from Seungcheol, though it was dry and painful. “...You really don’t know where he is?”

“No,” Seungcheol said. “I don’t. But he didn’t just fall off the face of the earth.” Seungchol seemed to pucker his lips in thought before adding. “If I hear from him, I’ll tell you.”

Joshua’s eyes widened at the comment. “....Thank.. Uh, yeah. Good. You'd better.” He fumbled, coughing into his hand. Seungcheol’s lip quirked into a smile as he got up from his seat.

“I need to head back to work. I have some interviews I’m conducting since we’re so short-staffed now, and they’re piling up.” Joshua hesitated, but nodded. He knew nothing more would be coming out of this conversation, even if they spoke for another four hours. “I’ll take my leave.” And with a bow, Seungcheol pushed in his chair. He turned and took a few paces before turning back to Joshua. “You know, I might be a bit jealous.”

Joshua’s brows furrowed. “Why the hell are you telling me that?”

Seungcheol bit his lip. “Because when you were just getting emotional, wondering if Mingyu was upset with you, and if he regrets his decision, I know you didn’t do that for me.” Joshua swallowed, frowning a bit. “And it hurts a little bit, because I really did love you.”

“Gh, uh….” Joshua’s cheeks turned red, turning his head to Junhui in shock. The assistant merely raised his eyebrows, avoiding his face. “What is this, your last-ditch attempt to win me back?”

“Oh no.” Seungcheol shook his head. “I’m not an idiot. You’re way too in love with Mingyu to ever want me back.” Seungcheol tilted his head. “I can’t say I blame you, though. I was kind of a dick.” 

Joshua exhaled, falling silent as Seungcheol offered one more nod in his direction, before slipping out the door and leaving Joshua with even more questions than he had before. 

----------------

Joshua decided the best way to answer his questions was by doing exactly what he planned from the start: confronting Mingyu about everything, regardless of if he wanted to or not. So, the morning after his meet-up with Seungcheol, Joshua scooped Junhui up in his car and the pair started on their drive down to Mingyu’s apartment building.

Joshua slipped out of the car, heading to the door and immediately ringing Mingyu’s buzzer. He tilted his head up, eyeing Mingyu’s floor as if it would make seeing Mingyu that much easier. But nothing. So, he rang again.

And again. And again. And again and again and again, until-.

“What the hell?!” Joshua stomped his foot, turning to Junhui. “Is he serious?!”

“Hyung,” Junhui said quickly. “Take it easy. Screaming in front of his apartment building won’t solve anything; it’ll just make you look like a creepy stalker.”

Joshua felt the vein in his eyebrow twitch as he glanced back at Mingyu’s call button. Just as he was about to ring it again, a woman approached. He’d seen her in the lobby and through the halls several times, but the pair only acknowledged one another in polite head nods when Joshua was heading to Mingyu’s apartment, and his mask was tugged well over his face. He swallowed, turning to her. 

“Excuse me.” He said. The woman stopped, eyes wide in shock at Joshua’s sudden, frantic movements. “Kim Mingyu, have you seen him lately? Or rather…” he sighed. “Can you let me in to see him?”

The young woman was quiet for a moment, adjusting the strap of her pocketbook as she shifted on uneasy feet. It wasn’t a good sign, and Joshua could already feel the dread building up in his chest. Did Mingyu tell people not to let him in? How serious was this?!

“Oh well, uh…” she began slowly. “Kim Mingyu moved out.”

“...What?” Joshua could barely manage the word, feeling as if the wind had been knocked from him. She nodded, pity already forming in her eyes. 

“I’m sorry. He’d had his stuff moved about… maybe a week ago?” 

“A we-.” Joshua pressed his hand against the wall to steady himself when Junhui reached out and held onto his arm.

“Thank you so much.” He said, gently guiding Joshua out of the way. With one more pitying glance, the woman headed into the apartment, and Joshua watched the doors close before him. “Hyung…” Junhui said softly.

“Where the hell did he go?” he asked. Scrambling for his phone, he pulled Mingyu’s number up, immediately heading down the steps and out towards the street. He ignored all of Junhui’s calls to him, simply looking down each corner of the street. When he reached Mingyu’s voicemail, he groaned, running a hand through his hair. Where could he possibly have moved in just a week?! How could he move his stuff, get a new apartment and end his lease last minute all in the span of seven days?! “This can’t be happening…” 

“Hyung?” He heard Junhui call, but he didn’t acknowledge him. Instead, looking down the direction of town, Joshua simply started walking down the street. “Hyung!” Junhui’s voice got fainter and fainter as Joshua ultimately began picking up his pace, heading down the street. Joshua couldn’t really tell where his feet were taking him at this point. He was just wandering, a slave to his own feet as he passed by buildings that suddenly looked so foreign. Joshua’s eyes scanned the streets, wondering if every guy with his hat tipped low or a broad-shouldered man on his phone would turn out to be Mingyu hiding in plain sight. Wanting to be found. But so far, nothing.

His eyes snapped towards the sound of a bell ringing, a couple stepping out of the same bakery he’s bought pastries from. He huffed, running a hand through his hair as he continued, slowing to a jog rather than a full sprint. 

Why the hell did you move everything so quickly, Mingyu? He thought to himself. Where did you go?

Joshua had made it to a busier part of the city, the market road bustling with vendors and sellers. He could smell the various foods, feel the thick heat of the fryers, and hear the shouting of people trying to sell their goods. People were gliding through the path, packed together like sardines as they veered off to the stalls that caught their attention. His feet only slowed because he couldn’t possibly move anymore without bumping into something every few seconds, either a market stall or someone purchasing something at one. All he could do was force himself to stop right in the middle of the pathway, taking a deep breath. His vision blurred on the exhale, and with a soft curse under his breath he wiped at his eyes frantically. This sucks…

“You’re going to get run over at this rate.” Joshua blinked as a sharp, aged voice hit the back of his head, followed by a bump on the back. He staggered forward, wiping the rest of his eyes. 

“Grandma, be nice!” Joshua’s back straightened more at the younger voice, and he immediately turned around. Behind him stood Hong Eunchae and her grandmother, their hands full of bags of groceries from different vendors. He looked between them, watching as Eunchae was the first to recognize him and break into a toothy smile. “Oppa! Hello again!”

“Oh, uh….” Joshua sniffled, nodding his head. “Hi.” 

Grandma was silent, and Joshua’s eyes fell to her. Her eyes were narrow, hidden a bit behind her wrinkles, and her lips were pursed in a tight line. Just as Joshua was about to open his mouth to speak, mutter an excuse and dart away, she shoved her set of bags in his arms. He stumbled, gripping them tightly. 

“What the–.” He gasped, his eyes wide. Grandma had already started walking past him.

“Let’s go.” She said, her voice a bit softer. Joshua looked towards Eunchae, hoping for some kind of explanation. But she only smiled and started down the path with her grandmother, and Joshua realized he didn’t have a choice but to follow.

----------------

The restaurant was empty as the trio walked in, minus Eunchae’s brother wiping down tables. Grandma immediately motioned to him. “Go heat up some soup, alright? A lot of it.” She turned to Joshua. “Do you drink?”

Joshua looked over, setting the three bags onto the first open table he saw and rubbing his sore arms. “Uh… I’m alright…” he said, and Grandma simply nodded. 

“Sit.” She motioned to one of the tables, and Joshua walked over, sinking into the chairs. His eyes flickered around the space, once bustling with familiar cheers and calls for more alcohol across the room. It was almost eerie when it was quiet. Grandma settled in her own seat, her eyes staring into Joshua’s soul. He blinked.

“...Are you closed today?” Joshua asked, just hoping to fill the silence somehow. Grandma nodded.

“We were low on groceries,” she said simply. “And I couldn’t leave my grandson in charge of the whole place, so we closed for the day.” Joshua nodded, though he didn’t fully understand, briefly acknowledging Eunchae when she set a water bottle in front of him. 

“It’s uhm…” Joshua rubbed his palms on his pants. “Funny… that you recognized me in such a crowded space.”

“How could I not?” She cocked an eyebrow. “Not every day a young man comes into the store causing such a ruckus!” Joshua opened his mouth, feeling the bubbling frustration of having to wait for an order he had to walk here for, but he immediately closed his mouth in a tight line. Instead, he lowered his head a bit, closing his eyes.

“...I’m sorry…” he said. He heard Grandma hum. 

“It’s not just that.” Something was set down in front of Joshua, and when he looked up, Eunchae had set an envelope in front of him. “You left a pretty large amount of change behind.” Joshua cocked an eyebrow, lifting up the envelope to see almost 200 dollars in his gaze. He closed the envelope, setting it back on the table and pushing it back over to Grandma.

“It…was a tip,” Joshua said, avoiding his gaze because he knew the owner wasn’t buying it. He was just trying to get out of there and back to Mingyu; he had no idea how much money he slammed onto the table. Grandma didn’t say anything, though, simply taking the money and passing it back to her granddaughter. 

“You’re the son of that company, right? Hong?” Joshua nodded his head, biting the inside of his lip. “I knew you looked familiar. I’ve seen you in the papers. Couldn’t imagine you’d ever come out here, though.”

“So has everyone else.” Her grandson piped up, hiding behind Eunchae when their grandmother shot him a warning look. Joshua chuckled a bit, watching as a large plate of food was set in front of him. A tray of beef soup, rice, and other side dishes. He looked up at Grandma, who simply motioned towards it.

“It’s leftover from yesterday, but it reheats well,” she said. “Go ahead.” Not wanting to be rude anymore than he had, Joshua reached for the chopsticks, and with an appreciative thanks, began to eat. Immediately, his eyes lit up, covering his mouth as he chewed a large bite of beef. He saw Grandma smile. “How is it?”

“Delicious!” He gasped, immediately going in with his spoon to get some of the broth. “I didn’t eat this last time, but Mingyu told me it was good!” He brought the spoon to his lips, taking a sip of broth with some of the noodles. After a second to sit with what he just said, Joshua felt his breath stutter. He looked up, seeing the owner cock an eyebrow. “I mean-.”

“It’s none of my business,” she said. “I invited you here because you looked like you needed some good food in your system. Have you eaten?” 

Joshua chuckled, looking down at the tray of food in front of him. “Uh, I guess-,” he began. He could feel her piercing glare without having to raise his head and immediately said. “No.” 

“Eunchae, get another helping of the soup for him. Put some extra meat in this one.” About to protest, Joshua only watched as she offered a smile and headed back to the kitchen, dragging her brother along. Joshua sighed, lifting up his chopsticks and taking another bite of noodles. She watched until her grandkids were gone, and then turned back to Joshua. “Is there a reason you were seen crying in the middle of a public place?” 

Joshua sat up straight, setting her chopsticks down. Instinctively, he rubbed his eyes. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” she said. “But nobody I’ve ever met doing that is doing it because they want to keep it a secret.” She tilted her head. “They want someone to ask what’s wrong.”

The comment made his throat tighten instinctively, and he reached for his water to take a long sip. “...I don’t have anything to say,” he said softly, setting the cup down. “I don’t think there’s anything I can do now,” he said. “I think after this meal, I’m just going to go back home and forget about it…”

“You don’t sound very satisfied with that answer.”

“Like I said, what else can I do?” he asked, knowing she had even fewer answers to that question than he did, but hoping somehow she’d provide one he was missing. “I came here looking for something that doesn’t want to be found. I just look like an idiot right now.” He ran a hand through his hair. “And I’m tired…” 

“The broth will help with that,” she said, and Joshua raised an eyebrow. “It’ll wake you up.” He chuckled, head hanging low on his neck and shoulders. “Well, all I can tell you is to make your decision after eating a good meal. Nobody makes good decisions on an empty stomach.” 

Joshua nodded, unable to hold back a smile as he continued fiddling with the chopsticks, taking another bite of noodles. For a moment, neither of them spoke, and all that was heard was the clatter of utensils in the back kitchen. Joshua glanced over when he heard them bickering. 

“They must work hard.” He said. Grandma nodded. 

Grandma smiled, once again nodding her head. “They’re both good kids, they’ve made their parents proud.” She glanced back at him. “I say it’s a child’s first goal in life to make their parents proud, and it just continues to follow and grow with them as they get older.” 

Joshua nodded his head, looking up at the wall of history hanging up on the opposite end of the restaurant. He studied a photo of a young couple opening the restaurant years ago, to one of the family now, expanded and large and beautiful. 

“That must be nice,” he murmured. 

As Joshua finished his meal and set his utensils on the tray, Eunchae returned to collect it, calling to her brother that it was his turn to do the dishes. Joshua felt his lips curl in a smile when the bickering started up once again, and he wondered if Mingyu and Minyeong bickered like that in their youth. 

“Thank you again for the food,” Joshua said, slowly rising up from his seat. He stopped, digging into his bag and pulling out his wallet. He barely got the wallet open before Grandma coughed.

“What are you doing? Put that away!” Joshua looked up, eyes wide in confusion. “I told you we’re closed today.” 

“But, uh-.” Grandma’s eyebrows shot up, and Joshua took that as enough of a sign to silently put his wallet away. “Thank you…” He hummed. Turning to his watch, he saw it had already been the better part of an hour. “Junhui must be panicking. I need to go.” Standing up from his seat, Joshua ran a hand through his hair and began collecting his things. 

“When you aren’t as tired, and you solve whatever problem you have, make sure to come back.” Joshua looked over, watching Grandma hold up the envelope in her hand. “This here has guaranteed you at least ten more free meals.” 

“Ah…” Joshua gulped, nodding his head. “Alright…” He looked up as Eunchae poked her head back out, her hair slightly messy and falling in front of her face from the labor of cleaning.

“Bye Oppa! Hope to see you soon!” Joshua nodded his head, bowing politely and finally exiting the restaurant, allowing the door to close behind him before turning to peek back inside. He watched as Grandma sat at the table, staring at the now empty chair across from her. After a minute, she simply got up, and started towards the bags of food Joshua had set down when they arrived, silently rummaging through it. 

Joshua walked back down the street he came from, hands in his pockets. He didn’t feel as delirious or exhausted, not nearly as desperate to run anywhere that Mingyu could possibly be. As he said, he was tired. This entire ordeal was exhausting.

It’s a child’s first goal in life to make their parents proud. 

Maybe I should just forget all of this and go back home. Joshua thought to himself, despite the throbbing pain the mere thought shot through his chest. Just be done with the whole thing, and-.

Joshua’s feet slowed when he heard a familiar voice calling to him, eyes shooting up ahead to see Junhui jogging towards him. He looked sweaty, and slightly panicked, just like every other day of the week. When he got to Joshua’s side, he all but collapsed onto him. “Hyung!” He gasped. “There you are! Are you alright?!” Junhui blinked. “Why do you smell like beef and soup?” 

Joshua managed a small smile. “Sorry, uh… stopped to get something to eat, I guess,” he said. “I didn’t realize I haven’t eaten anything today…” Junhui sighed, concerned yet satisfied with the answer he was given. Just then, as Joshua opened his mouth, tempted to ask to be driven back home and have Namjoo invited over, a deep, familiar voice settled in the back of his mind:

I always went to him when I didn’t know what to do. I just wanted him to always be proud of me, y’know?

Joshua’s heart skipped a bit, and his shoulders perked up. “...Junhui?” he questioned, catching his friend’s slightly more confused gaze. “I need to go to Suwon.”

“....What?” Junhui gasped, now fully exasperated. But despite that, Joshua took him by the arm and began heading towards the apartment where their car was left alone, determination brimming in his eyes.

Mingyu slung his bag over his shoulder, arms stretched over his head as he strolled down the street. He’d just hopped off the bus and it was only another three blocks before he reached his destination. It was his day off, and yet Mingyu was twenty minutes from his apartment and tugging at the white polo shirt with a clover stitched just into the chest.

Despite it being his day off, Mr. Na had asked him to come in last minute to cover someone else’s shift. Mingyu could never say no to Mr. Na, despite how exhausted he was and how much he was looking forward to just sitting on his couch today until Joshua got home from work. 

The thought alone made Mingyu feel his chest tighten: wait for Joshua to get home. It felt domestic in ways Mingyu didn’t know before. The idea that he would be waiting for someone to come over just for him was one that made him feel nostalgic. He was planning on putting on a romantic movie today or something to pass the time, but it seemed that would have to wait. Maybe watching it with someone would be better anyway. 

Just as he reached the corner, seeing the side of the cafe in the distance, Mingyu’s phone began vibrating in his pocket. Mingyu pulled it out and answered in one swift motion, rocking back on his heels. “Hello?” he hummed. 

“Hey.” Seungcheol’s voice made Mingyu perk up, brows furrowed as he glanced at the stop sign. “Sorry to bother you while you have a day off.”

“Don’t be.” He said. In an instant, his heart rate picked up, and he gasped. “Is Joshua-hyu - ah, Jisoo … is Jisoo okay?” He heard a laugh on the other end, one that made Seungcheol sound incredibly sleepy.

“Yeah. He’s just fine; if anything, he’s too good. He’s been extra cheery all over the building this morning.” Mingyu sighed in relief, before an image of an overly excited and social Joshua played in his mind. It was certainly a sight to see. “No, Gyu, I wanted to talk to you. Can we meet?”

“Meet?” The light turned green, but Mingyu didn’t move with the rest of the crowd. “Aren’t you at work?”

“Don’t worry about that. Can we meet?”

“Well, sure, but I’m all the way out by my house-.” 

“I figured as much. I’m on my way there. Send me a cafe near you and wait for me there, alright?”

Mingyu’s brows furrowed. “Are you sure everything is alright?”

“I promise,” Seungcheol said, but Mingyu wasn’t convinced. Still, he said his goodbyes and sent the location of another cafe just an extra block away. Mingyu sighed, finally starting across the street. It seemed his per-diem job would have to wait for him just a little bit longer. 

----------------

Seungcheol arrived 30 minutes after Mingyu, and for some reason, Mingyu was shocked not to see him in his work attire. He was wearing a loose black tee shirt with writing on the back and a pair of jean shorts, brushing his hair back into a denim cap similar to Mingyu’s. It didn’t take him long to find him in the small cafe, seeing as he was towering over most of the other patrons and decor alike. 

Mingyu nodded his head politely when Seungcheol got closer, but he simply waved his hand and plopped down in the seat beside him. 

“I waited to order something,” Mingyu said. Seungcheol glanced up at the menu hanging over the counter. 

“Thanks. I’ll grab something in a minute.” He turned his head, eyes studying Mingyu. “How was Jeju?”

“Huh? Oh…” something warm bubbled in Mingyu’s chest, and he smiled a bit too fondly. “It was nice.” 

“...That’s good..” Seungcheol said. “You weren't back long before your day off, so I didn’t get to ask.”

“Yeah, it was good…” he repeated. After a minute, Mingyu coughed into his hand, tilting his head to the side like he needed to get water out of his ear. “Jo- Jisoo had fun too.”

“You can call him Joshua. I won’t say anything,” Seungcheol assured. “I’m sure you both prefer it, anyway.” Mingyu’s lips twitched into a smile, but it immediately fell with Seungcheol let out a deep sigh and glanced back at the menu hung up behind them.

Mingyu shifted in the quiet, eyeing the menu himself despite knowing what he would get the second he walked in. Finally, unable to handle sitting in the tension, he blurted out. “Hyung, you’re scaring me.” Seungcheol glanced over, chuckling to himself.

“Sorry,” he said gently. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” His smile faded as he shifted in his own seat. “I’ll cut right to the chase.”

“Please,” Mingyu begged. Seungcheol leaned forward, arms folding in front of him as he studied Mingyu’s nervous face.

“I think Mr. Hong is catching on to what’s going on with you and his son.”

Mingyu blinked, “Huh?”

Seungcheol’s eyebrow arched, but he didn’t react, he only kept speaking. “I overheard him while you were in Jeju. It sounds like he knows Joshua’s involved with someone, at the very least.” He eyed him. “I think if he doesn’t already know, it’ll be a matter of time before he finds out.”

“But…” Mingyu exhaled. “Really?” Seungcheol nodded. Mingyu looked down at his phone and Seungcheol piped up.

“Telling Joshua won’t do any good. It’s not like he can do anything.” Seungcheol leaned back. “I’m telling you because you need to end things with him before he finds out.” 

“But-.”

“Mingyu, there are no buts.” He said simply. “If he finds out Joshua’s sleeping around with someone from the company? It’ll be a blood bath.”

“It’s not just sleeping around, Hyung.” Mingyu felt himself say, and it even shocked him, eyes widening as Seungcheol’s lips hiked into a chuckle. 

“Right.” He didn't sound convinced by Mingyu’s words as he leaned back in his seat. “Listen, I know from experience that when Mr. Hong has proof that his son’s been cheating on his fiance he will stop at nothing to make it disappear.” He said.

“He said, Miss. Noh is aware.”

“She is.” Seungcheol clarified. “But he uses the adultery angle because the real truth is much worse to him. He refuses to let any of it get out. Joshua knows that.”

Despite feeling his heart start to forget how to beat in his chest, Mingyu knew it too; how could he not? Joshua never said it outright, but Mingyu was anything but stupid. The tension between the father and son spelled out their entire life story in the way they spoke with and interacted with one another behind closed doors. Mingyu has had a first-hand view of it for months now. 

“I didn’t want this to happen,” he said as if he needed to atone for something horrible. Seungcheol’s face softened. 

“I know,” he said. “That’s why I wanted to warn you. So you can end this before it gets worse.” 

“Hyung, it’s…” Mingyu rubbed the back of his neck. “I know you’re right, but I can’t just end it like that….” He gulped. “As I said, it’s not just sleeping around anymore.”

“Oh?” Seungcheol questioned. “Did Joshua say so?”

Mingyu bit his lip, their late-night car talk flashing back in his mind. Joshua avoided his gaze, asking to go back to his apartment. Muttering one apology that suddenly sounded laced with a lot more guilt. Mingyu swallowed something sour.

“Well, no, but-.”

“Mingyu, I have told you about Joshua before. At the end of the day, he only cares about himself and what he wants.” Seungcheol pulled back for a moment, a tight look on his face as he tried to find the right words. “He was raised by Hong Jiwon for fucks sake. No matter how much he hates the guy, he learned everything about anything from his father, who is ten times more selfish and manipulative than Joshua is.”

“He’s not-.”

“Joshua coaxes people into his arms under the false purity that he has real feelings for them, that their circumstances are unfortunate circumstances at best. And people can’t say no because he’s Joshua fucking Hong, he’s stunning and charming and rich. He’s not stupid, that’s for sure.”

It doesn’t matter if the feelings are pure, Mingyu…

Mingyu opened his mouth, but nothing came out, and even if it did, Seungcheol kept talking.

“All he wants is to piss off his dad by doing something he knows will never go public. He’s smart, but he’s a coward; he hides behind the same name he claims to hate so much. The second he gets bored or his father catches wind of who he’s involved with, he loses all interest. You might as well be dirt under his shoe. The only reason he pursued you so hard after Waterbomb is that he found out you worked for the company. Do you not realize how fucking golden the opportunity was to him? Having someone right under his father’s nose.” 

“That’s not true, Hyung. Joshua isn’t like that.” Mingyu gulped when he heard his voice crack. “He’s a bit of a brat, but he’s not… at least not anymore.”

Seungcheol hummed. “When he and I got involved in college, he said the same stuff I bet he said to you. ‘Our feelings are pure’, ‘I care about you’, ‘I want this to work’. We were involved for almost an entire semester. I knew it was a bad idea, especially when he started seeing Namjoo publicly. But every time I brought it up, he told me it was temporary, that he needed to get things sorted before we could be together properly. And I believed him every single time, because I cared about him. And I thought he cared about me...” He shook his head. “He’s good at that. Making you feel like you’re the only one who gets him, the only one who he can trust."

Mingyu gulped, thinking back to all the nights Joshua rushed into his arms, desperate to escape his father’s eye, even for just a few hours. How he’d plead with Mingyu to meet at hotels in the middle and to stay until long after the sun came up. Was it all just so he could have something to throw in his father’s face? Just the thought of the possibility made him feel queasy.

“What… happened?” Mingyu asked curiously, though he feared he didn’t want to know the answer.

“Well,” Seungcheol said with a bitter bite in his voice. “Someone caught the two of us on a date in Itaewon at a nightclub with some of our college friends. We weren’t even really that close or intimate there, but whoever his father hired got just what he needed. So he called me to his office and basically offered me my job to keep my mouth shut and stop the relationship.”

“Oh…” Mingyu whispered.

Seungcheol clicked his tongue. “Joshua was in the room with us, too. I was waiting for him to say something, like he said he would. It was the perfect time to speak up for us and fight for what he said were pure feelings.” Seungcheol shook his head. “He didn’t even look at me…”

Mingyu bit his lip, looking down at his lap when Seungcheol tilted his head back, finally going quiet for a moment. The silence was deafening to Mingyu, though, he almost wished Seungcheol continued talking despite how each word made it feel like he was stabbed in the gut. 

“So you… took the job…” Mingyu finally said softly. Seungcheol hummed. 

“Mhm, began training right under your father the next day,” he sighed. “I regretted taking it at first, because for a second, I thought Joshua looked kind of hurt.” He shook his head. “Then I heard rumors that he was back at the clubs within three days.” He shook his head. “He didn’t care about us; he just wanted to use me to piss off his father. And the second he got caught-.” Seungcheol snapped his fingers, the echo reverberating through the cafe. Mingyu’s eyes snapped back up. “He gave up.” 

“Hyung, I’m sor-."

“Don’t be. I’m over it.” Seungcheol tilted his head. “I don’t know your relationship behind closed doors, but I know I can only speak from experience. But trust me, Mingyu. If he did it so easily, then at 19, now that he’s smarter and wiser and older, he’ll do it again. Maybe not exactly the same way, but he will. Because that’s how he is. And you’ve worked way too hard to let him ruin it.”

“...But I’ve already ruined it,” Mingyu said softly.  “Even if I ended things, they’ll find out that there was something at some point, and it’ll be the same fate.”

Seungcheol exhaled. “That’s true,” he agreed. “But still-.”

“I need to talk to him,” Mingyu admitted. “I just… maybe it’s stupid, but I need to talk to him.” 

Seungcheol was silent for a moment, studying Mingyu with a tight, unsure expression. Mingyu had to admit, he had no idea what he was saying. His brain felt like it was taken out of his head, stepped on, and then put back in. All of his thoughts, his memories, were scrambled. Nothing felt like it made sense anymore. Was he remembering all of this time incorrectly? 

“Right… “ Seungcheol’s voice was soft again. “You had told me last time that you’re weak when it comes to him.” Mingyu frowned. “I can’t be upset with you for that. I was the same way at one point.” 

Seungcheol rose from the table, dusting off his pants and putting his hands in his pockets. “At the end of the day, you need to remember what you’ve been working for all these years and what’s important, and you need to protect that because nobody else will. Especially not him.” 

Mingyu felt the need to say something burning at the tip of his tongue, but it simply sizzled at the end when Seungcheol finally started towards the counter to order something.

----------------

Mingyu pushed through the back door of the cafe. Not even the smell of vanilla or cinnamon could wake Mingyu up from this sudden fog that hit him as soon as he and Seungcheol parted. He simply let the door swing closed behind him and hung his head forward, rubbing a hand over his face. 

Hearing the commotion, Mr. Na headed to the back, breaking into a relieved grin at the sight of his extra hands. “Hey Ming- oh…” He frowned, watching as Mingyu staggered into the back room and reached for an apron. “Are you okay?”

“Yes…” Mingyu said softly, tugging the apron around his waist. A deep exhale as the string tugged the apron tight around his waist and he turned to his boss. “I’m sorry it took me longer to arrive.”

“It’s fine…” Mr. Na said, pushing aside any upset with him arriving later than he said he would. “You sure you’re okay?”

Mingyu started at the front of the cafe. “...I think so,” he said simply. 

----------------

The sound of the cafe bell ringing, followed by a high-pitched ‘Mingyu~.’ made his body tense. Mingyu inhaled, looking up at the door as Joshua walked over. He was still in his work clothes, most likely fresh off the clock. He discarded his jacket, setting it over the chair he claimed for himself and finally arrived at the counter, leaning forward so his body pillowed on his elbows. His black bangs fell in front of his face a bit more than they did the last time Mingyu noticed, and his heart swelled. 

“Fancy seeing you here.” Joshua teased, his lips curling into a little smile. Mingyu inhaled, forcing a soft smile onto his features. He needed to talk to him, but not now. Not like this. 

“Hey…” he said softly. He had to reach around to tie his apron; not because it was loose, but because his hands suddenly felt the need to shake uncontrollably. “What uhm… what can I get for you?”

Joshua tilted his head. “The usual, I guess,” he said. “I had a long drive here, so I need something to keep myself awake for the rest of the night.” Mingyu watched the minx’s eyes dip along Mingyu’s collar. “Y’know?”

The sudden feeling of false memories slammed back into him like a truck, and Mingyu had to press his palm against the counter. He leaned forward a bit to catch his balance, watching Joshua’s eyes sparkle at the idea. He gulped, immediately pulling himself back. “Right. Okay.” He turned to the register and tapped the order in quickly. He could feel Joshua’s eyes on him the entire transaction, until his card was tucked safely back into his pocket. “I’ll make it right now.” And Joshua only nodded his head. 

Mingyu knew how to make Joshua’s drink so easily that he could do it in his sleep, which was good, because Mingyu couldn’t help but find himself zoning out as he moved through the back of the counter. He had planned to talk to Joshua but not now! He had just been told something so… confusing, a mere twelve hours ago. 

Joshua hummed when the drink was pushed across the counter, eyes almost sparkling. Mingyu could barely watch him lift the drink to his lips before he spoke.

“Hyung, can we talk?”

----------------

Joshua was still sipping his drink, already halfway through, when the pair stepped outside onto the pavement. Mingyu stood by the back door, hands locked firmly at his sides as he watched Joshua stand before him. Mingyu inhaled, tilting his head as a hand raked through his locks.

“So…” Joshua pulled the straw from his lips. “What’s wrong?”

“Hm?”

“Oh, come on.” Joshua chuckled. “I’m not an idiot… What happened? You look like you’re going to cry.” Mingyu averted his eyes, only looking back when Joshua stepped closer.  He’d discarded his drink, eyes studying him. “Seriously, what’s wrong?”

“Hyung I…” he rubbed his jaw. “What… shit… okay.” Joshua cocked an eyebrow, hands impatiently on his hips. “What do I… and this… mean to you?” Mingyu finally forced himself to meet Joshua’s eyes, watching as they widened slightly. Mingyu’s heart almost stopped beating. “Seriously. Honestly…”

For a minute, Joshua didn’t speak, but his mouth was open slightly. The longer he stayed silent the more anxiety buried in Mingyu’s head, and he forced himself to fill the silence before doubt could cloud his mind. “You mean enough to me to tell my sister and my friends about you. To put my entire livelihood on the line.”

Now Joshua seemed almost annoyed, his eyes narrowing slightly. “What? Mingyu, are you serious right now? I thought we were done with this…” Despite his annoyance, his voice was soft, bordering con oncern. It made Mingyu’s heart tighten. Finally, Joshua’s hands fell to his sides. “You know I can’t.”

“I know.” Mingyu nodded. “I understand your family life. It’s not easy for you. That your situation has led me to do things I never in my life thought I’d be a part of. I’m not asking if you’re going to come clean. I just want to know what it means to you.”

“...Mingyu, where is this coming from?”

Mingyu spoke before Joshua could finish uttering the last word. “The first night we were together, you said your feelings were pure, and that’s the only reason you wanted to pursue me… was that true?”

Joshua fell silent again. Mingyu’s canine sank into the bottom of his lip as he waited for a response that never came. Joshua licked his bottom lip, rubbed his jaw, and shifted on his feet. He did everything but respond, and that was enough for Mingyu.

“Seriously, where the hell did you hear that from?” Joshua finally asked, his voice a bit harder this time. “Seungcheol?”

“That doesn’t matter who said it, not if it’s true,” Mingyu said. “Just tell me if it is.”

Joshua clicked his tongue, thrown off by Mingyu’s sterner-than-normal behavior. “I- I… Mingyu, listen, it’s not… it wasn’t like that.”

Mingyu took a deep breath to make sure he didn’t deflate on the floor like a balloon. “So, it is true.” 

“Was.” 

“What’s the difference?” Mingyu felt a bit more of an exasperated bite on the back of his throat as the words left his mouth. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“That… it wasn’t… It’s not like that anymore.” He tried to explain. “I mean it is, but… it’s not and… fuck, this wasn’t supposed to happen.”

Mingyu’s throat was burning, another deep, almost sharp breath in his chest. “I told you I was putting myself on the line despite the risks because I cared about you, when clearly you didn’t feel the same way. Do you feel the same way now?”

“Mingyu, enough, this isn’t-.”

“No, not enough!” Mingyu snapped. “Stop saying enough! Joshua-hyung, don’t you realize how fucking upset this makes me?”

“But that was months ago, almost an entire year, it’s not like that anymore, isn’t it? You said so yourself in the car!”

“No, I asked you if you thought we were there! I never got a real answer. If it’s not like that anymore, why didn’t you tell me? We…” Mingyu tilted his head back. “All that tells me is you didn’t ever feel the same way about me.” He gulped. “Was this what you meant when you said you were surprised I said everything? That you only used me to piss off your father or whatever the fuck and you lied to me?!” 

Joshua blinked. “I… didn’t Namjoo talk to you?”

Mingyu blinked. “About you using me? No.” 

“No!” Joshua groaned. “Not about that, Jesus fuck! About us. Me and I. Why I have no choice in this!”

“She did. But that has nothing to do with you using me and telling me you really cared about me when in fact I was just another pawn to get back at your father!” 

“Another pa-.” Joshua grimaced. “Listen, whatever the fuck Seungcheol said to you, he doesn’t know what he’s-.”

“Hyung!” Mingyu’s eyes widened. He watched Joshua flinch, and a split second moment wanted to pull him close and apologize but it was drowned by the tidal wave of emotion bursting overhead. “Don’t blame Seungcheol-hyung because you were lying to me! Even if it’s not true now, it was true then! And I learned the truth from someone else! When I made myself perfectly clear that I couldn’t possibly risk my career! I did it because I trusted you, I thought you wanted to really be with me!” Joshua swallowed, most likely what was an attempted argument back. “I feel like a fucking joke, don’t you care?” 

“Mingyu…”

“How long was it just an act? How long was I just a person you got in bed to watch your father’s eye twitch? How long did you plan to keep me around before discarding me like everyone else? Like Seungcheol-hyung?”

“That was….” Joshua’s mouth clamped shut. His eyes diverted, a hand brushing over his mouth in thought. Mingyu hoped the people inside weren’t able to hear them; this probably wasn’t the best spot for this type of conversation anyway. 

“Tell me, will you at least offer me a warning before you drop me as you dropped him? Will you at least look at me while your father fucking kills me?!”

“Mingyu!” Joshua’s eyes widened, his body going rigid. 

His lips were tightly closed, looking down at his feet. Guilt was already spreading through his veins. This isn’t what he wanted, a screaming match in the street late at night. He knew it was complicated, that there was more at play here. But God, if it didn’t sting fiercely at just the thought. “Hyung, I don’t want to do this and yell at you. I’m not… angry.” Joshua’s eyes snapped back up to him. “I’m just so fucking hurt. No matter where we might stand now, it’s only this way because you lied to me in the beginning. Crossed my boundary for yourself.” he sighed. “And I feel even worse than I have before about all this. I was ultimately a means to an end with you.”

Joshua opened his mouth, but no words came out. Mingyu turned back to the back door of the cafe. “Maybe it’s my fault. I was too deep in denial for a while. I thought even if it had happened before, with Seungcheol-hyung and god knows who else, it wouldn’t happen to me. Because I told you my limits. But I might just be much stupider than I think I am. I was stupid enough to believe you respected me back then, so I did this to myself.”

“Ah, Mingyu-.” Joshua stepped forward. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to do this here, but it wouldn’t be fair to you to act like things are okay.” he inhaled. “I…” he shook his head. “I think we should stop talking about it for now….”

“We can’t, we-.”

“Goodnight.” And with a final nod of his head, Mingyu headed into the cafe again, allowing the door to swing behind him. He heard footsteps as he stepped through the door again, turning back to see Josthat hua had taken several paces closer.

“You’re seriously going to stop it there? Let’s talk now.” His voice wasn’t demanding so much as it was pleading, eyes searching Mingyu’s face for some semblance of weakness. He continued into the cafe, allowing the door to swing beside him and muffle the frustrated shout of his name. 

Mingyu walked back to the counter, assuring his boss he was good with a nod of his head and a tight hand through his hair that dug in his scalp. Despite his better judgment, Mingyu almost immediately looked back at the door he just walked through, but Joshua was already gone. 

----------------

The blast of his alarm made Joshua jolt up in bed, inhaling sharply. He blinked, looking around the room as the shrill shriek of the alarm dulled to background noise. It was midmorning, and the sound of the rest of the house starting their day could be heard downstairs. Joshua debated simply falling back into the comfort of his covers and pretending that he was asleep, but he knew he had to choose: deal with his father in the dining room or in his bedroom early in the morning?

The groan that left his mouth as he rolled out of bed was painful. 

Joshua staggered down the steps with a hand fisting the railing the entire way down. He felt like a baby deer trying to walk for the first time, and he hoped none of the workers were curious enough to catch sight. It seemed most of them were already focused on their tasks for the day, allowing Joshua to slip past without so much of a-.

“Good morning, Sir.” One of them smiled, nodding her head politely. Joshua simply lifted his hand in acknowledgement, eyes closed tightly. “Breakfast is just about ready. Shall I bring you?”

“I can get there myself, Yeongjung.” He assured, a small flicker of a smile on his face as he passed her by. He continued a similar song and dance through a few more servants before finally entering the dining room. His father and his wife looked up from their plates, Mr. Hong setting down his newspaper.

“There you are.” He said. “I’m amazed you woke up early,” he motioned to the open chair. “Come eat. We need to talk.”

Joshua’s eyes immediately lifted to the opposite end of the dining hall as he walked through, eyes landing on Junhui and Chan standing on the opposite side of the room for him. No, Mingyu, but he didn’t know what he had expected. They nodded at his arrival, and Joshua managed a faint nod of his head as he sat down. 

Just the smell of breakfast made him queasy, the desire to eat nowhere in his system. He’d run on the last few sips of that coffee he had yesterday at the cafe for the rest of his life if he had to.

Thinking of the cafe made Mingyu flash across his mind, standing with a confused, hurt expression, and Joshua immediately closed his eyes again, taking a deep breath. What the hell was he supposed to do about Mingyu? He seemed to want nothing to do with him. 

This wasn’t supposed to happen. He thought to himself, pushing food aimlessly on his plate. I just need to talk to him and explain everything, but jeez, he’s so stubborn! Joshua’s brows furrowed. He wanted to send a million texts to Mingyu since he was left outside the cafe, but he knew well enough to know that was not going to solve anything! But how long did Mingyu need?! He’d already laid everything out in front of him, and it’s been a day!  

“Jisoo?”

“What?” His eyes fell in exhaustion to his father, who immediately responded with an unpleasant eyebrow arch. 

“I need you to do some business for me.”

Oh, great, a cherry on top of this already bitter sundae. Joshua took a deep breath. “I’m really not feeling up to it, can it wait?” 

Mr. Hong didn’t seem pleased, but also not surprised. He simply shook his head. “No. It needs to be done.”

Joshua sighed, leaning back in his chair. A gentle hand pushed away the plate of untouched food, setting the utensils down with it. He only reached for the cup of coffee that was poured before his arrival. “What is it?”

“Mr. Koiguchi is holding an art show in Osaka in two days. I want you to attend at my place.” Joshua let out a long exhale, leaning his head back. 

“I’m really not feeling up to traveling anymore.” He said. “I just came back.”

“That was a vacation, this is business. If you can drop everything for a weekend trip to Jeju, you can do your job,” he said simply. Mr. Hong motioned to Mr. Park, who walked over and passed Joshua his passport. With a huff, Joshua took it into his hand. “Junhui had already been caught up to speed with what to expect and your itinerary for the week.”

“Week!?” Joshua’s eyes widened. “Why a week? Trips like this are a few days at maximum!”

“That’s the second part.” Mr. Hong continued, looking at his son from the head of the table. “I’ve spoken with the Noh’s about Namjoo accompanying you.”

“But-.”

“The last time you two have been on a proper trip was back in London.”

Joshua scoffed. “Would you even say that was a trip? I was practically living there.”

“All the more reason for you two to go on a vacation.” Mr. Hong said simply. “What? Do you have a problem with a couple going on vacation?” 

Joshua scowled behind his hand. Sharp eyes flickered to Chan and Junhui, neither of whom seemed to be sure of how to handle this. “No, Sir.”

“Good.” He nodded his head. “You should take some time to enjoy yourself, after all. Take her to some nice restaurants, and do some sightseeing. Have people who matter see you with your future wife once in a while.” 

“...When do I leave?”

“Your bags are packed, you’re leaving this evening.”

“Fuck me.” 

“Excuse me?”

“I’m going to get dressed.” And Joshua got up from the table without another glance at his untouched food. He started out the dining room, shoving his passport into Junhui’s chest on the way back up the steps. 

Joshua entered his room, looking to the right where a week's worth of luggage was packed. He arched an eyebrow. “When the hell did they come in here and do that?” he asked curiously, turning to Junhui.

“Last night while you were out,” he explained. That made sense; when he got home, he was so out of it from his fight with Mingyu, he only remembered the pillow case filling his vision as he fell into bed and passed out. Carding a hand through his hair did little to calm him down. 

“....I don’t have a choice, do I?” he asked, turning to Junhui and Chan in his doorway. Junhui’s lips twitched into a sympathetic smile as he shook his head. 

“No. He seemed very insistent you go on this trip.” He said. Joshua nodded his head. Maybe this was best. Joshua knew if he was within driving distance of Mingyu while he needed space, he’d be unable to focus on anything else. By the time I come back to Korea, Mingyu will be ready to talk.

Joshua walked to his closet and opened it up, scanning the different options of clothing. “Well… hopefully,” he mumbled under his breath.

“What was that?” Junhui piped up, stepping further into the bedroom. Joshua turned his head.

“Nothing,” he said. “Now get out so I can get dressed,” he said. “Unless you want to watch.” He chuckled as Junhui practically dragged Chan out the door, closing it tightly behind him. 

As morning turned to evening and Joshua was shuffled out to his waiting car, his father watched him from the window of his office. He didn’t move until the car was full, watching his son drop sunglasses over his eyes, sling a bag over his shoulder, and slip into the backseat of the car. When it finally pulled out of the family driveway, he turned to Mr. Park.

“Send for Mr. Kim Mingyu,” he said simply. “I want him here before the end of the day.” 

----------------

It felt as if a million years had passed by in the simple step through Mr. Hong’s office door. Confused eyes immediately darted around the office, from the shelves of books to the large family photo on the wall, to the owners of the entire building sitting straight ahead. Mingyu’s head fell in a bow. 

“Sir… I heard you wanted to see me.” He said softly. 

“Come. Sit.” Mr. Hong’s voice was toned, but still polite as he motioned to the seat at the table. Mingyu glanced over, nodding again to Mrs. Hong before sitting down. “I’m sorry to pull you away on your day off.”

“It’s alright,” Mingyu assured. “Is… Is Jisoo alright?” Despite everything, the thought alone of him not being okay made hair stand on end along his arms. Mr. Hong’s eyes flickered quickly, but he simply nodded.

“Yes. Last I heard, he and his fiancée are settling into the family house.” He kicked one leg over the other and looped his hands at the knee. “Couples' vacations are very important, you know.” 

Mingyu swallowed, nodding his head. “I’m sure they are.” He said gently. “I’m glad to hear he’s doing alright.” A moment of long, painful silence passed them and Mingyu finally bit the bullet. “I apologize, but… what did you call me here for?” 

Mr. Hong exhaled, closing his eyes for a moment. “You’ve been working with us for… a while now.” 

Mingyu nodded carefully, unsure what movements would trigger a bomb in the room. It was clear something wasn’t right but Mingyu couldn’t put a finger on it. But still, he had a bad feeling lingering deep in the back of his mind. “Yessir. I know I’ve thanked you many times but I don’t think I’ll ever repay how grateful I am to you for all you’ve done. For my father and me.” As he studied his boss’s face he thought he saw the man’s eyebrow twitch, but he schooled himself behind a tender smile. It was eerie how much father and son resembled one another sometimes, but Mingyu knew better than to ever say that to Joshua directly. 

Mr. Hong exhaled out of his nose before he spoke again. “Your father before you was also an important asset to our security. He kept this family, this company, safe from danger for many years.” Mr. Hong shifted. “He was a wonderful man.” 

“Thank you, Sir.” Mingyu’s voice wavered a bit, and he swallowed quickly. Mr. Hong turned to his assistant for a minute, who was still waiting by the front door of the office. 

“Can you bring us some drinks?” he asked. Mingyu watched as the man bowed and scurried out of the room, before Mr. Hong’s attention returned to Mingyu. “I was thinking back to some conversations you and I have had in the past.” He tilted his head. “Before your father fell ill, you were attending business school, correct? At the National University of Seoul?”

“Uh, yessir. I was there on a scholarship for business administration.” Mingyu’s fingers curled into the fabric of his pants. 

“Scholarship. Yes, your father had mentioned a few times that you were brilliant.” Mingyu bit the inside of his lip, watching as Mr. Hong reached forward and took a folder into his hands. 

Mingyu sat up a bit straighter to add, “I was actually hoping to intern and work in a job similar to this one.” He said. “In a company like yours.” 

A hint of a smile flashed on Mr. Hong’s face, flipped through the contents in the folder. Mingyu’s eyes were focused on his boss, a trickle of pride in his chest for being so straightforward. A bit ass-kissy, but he didn’t think too much of it. If this were heading to the worst-case scenario, it might even be necessary.

Setting the folder down, Mingyu finally saw inside both his and his father’s resumes for the security positions, as well all of their information. “And when your father fell ill, you took initiative and put your focus on taking care of him and your sister, despite losing out on your dreams in the process.” Mingyu nodded, grief splashing into the forefront of his mind for a moment. A vision of an unsure, dejected twenty-year-old with no idea where the rest of the path he was on would lead. “Sometimes, I wish my son were as hard-working and career driven as you seem to be.” He glanced back up at Mingyu. “He has a lot riding on his shoulders, you know.” 

“Yes, Sir, I know.” 

Mr. Hong leaned forward, grabbing another small envelope. He glanced at Mingyu and inhaled. “Anyway, right now we’re talking about you. Not my good for nothing son.” Mingyu bit the inside of his lip as Mr. Hong maneuvered around the table. “My wife and I were talking over dinner the other night.” He motioned over, his wife nodding in agreement with a small, almost motherly smile on her face. Mingyu watched as an envelope was passed across the table, a hesitant bow of gratitude as he took it into his own hands. It was white, with no writing on it, and it felt thin. One more look at Mr. Hong, who only motioned with his hand, and Mingyu finally opened it up.

The breath that caught in his throat was quick and sharp; it almost sent Mingyu falling back on the chair. In his hands was a check, filled out in every space except the amount line. His eyes studied Mr. Hong’s elegant signature at the bottom. “Ah… what… is this?”

“After discussing it with my wife, and taking into consideration all of the things you have done for this company in the last five years… we want to help send you back to school.”

Mingyu’s throat closed up, and he felt his eyes burn. No amount of blinking could fend off the tears he knew would come, but he managed to wipe his eyes with the back of his hand. When he looked between the couple, they were still smiling. But something seemed off… maybe it was because Mingyu was focusing on not falling to his knees and sobbing. “Sir–.”

“It’s high time you stop putting those smarts to waste, Mingyu.” He said simply. “You can choose any college in the country, take whichever courses you want. Textbooks, meals, transportation, whatever you need to focus all your attention on your studies. After all these years of focusing on everyone else, it’s time you finally start focusing on yourself, Kim Mingyu.”

Mingyu let out a long breath. He could only imagine what a blank check from Mr. Hong would do for him and Minyeong! Back in school, finally finishing the degree that has been collecting dust for the past few years. One job where he didn’t have to work part-time at all, where he could have set hours and days off, and nobody to look after…

And be loyal to me first…

Mingyu’s face felt stiff as his smile slowly fell. He set the check gently onto the table. 

“Is there a problem, Mingyu?” Mr. Hong asked. 

“Uh, no.” Mingyu ran a hand through his hair. “No, Sir. This is just. A lot. I didn’t expect this,” he shifted. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“I think it’s high time you spread your wings and use your brain the way it was intended to be used.” Mr. Hong finally chuckled. “And when you finish, I have some connections in the business world. You’ll be able to get into a job at any company of your choice.” Emphasizing his point, Mr. Hong pushed the blank check back towards Mingyu. “It’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

That was true. When would he ever get an opportunity like this again? Never. Not in this lifetime, at least. 

“I… How could I ever repay you for something like this?” 

The question altered the tone in the room and Mingyu immediately detected it. He gulped, fingers curling into the paper as he watched Mr. Hong reach to the table again, bringing another, thicker, manila envelope to the forefront of the conversation. With baited breath, Mingyu could only watch the scene before him. 

“There is one way. And it isn’t money.” Mingyu arched his eyebrow as he was ushered to the folder, encouraged to pick it up. Despite every fiber in his being saying otherwise, Mingyu took the envelope in his hands. He inhaled, quietly loosening the flap. It felt light despite obviously carrying many things, and he couldn’t place what was inside, no matter how hard he tried. So, finally, he peered inside, and his heart almost stopped beating.

Covered by shadow and obscured by others, there were very clear, very recent photos of Mingyu. Photos of him at his part-time job, walking into his apartment, looking around the halls of this very building. He knew his hand loosened, but he didn’t realize he had dropped the envelope until it hit the table, allowing a few of the photos to scatter out for everyone to see. There, in full glory, were photos of not just him, but Joshua. By the corner supply closet a few halls away, wandering into his apartment late at night, on the beach a mere week before, strolling hand in hand. Mingyu could almost taste the salty air on his lips still, and it made him shudder. Looking at these photos made the span of eight months feel like a lifetime that had somehow managed to be lived. 

Mr. Hong cut Mingyu’s panicked thoughts like a knife when he decided to speak, finally reminding Mingyu he wasn’t alone in the room. “You see what I’m asking you, don’t you?” 

“Sir, please-.” Mingyu gasped. “You don’t understand.”

“I understand perfectly.” Mr. Hong’s voice was no longer giving and toned; it was becoming rougher and more agitated. “I understand what it looks like when I get betrayed.”

“No! No, Sir, that’s not what this is.”

“I’m not listening to you groveling at your feet for forgiveness, Mingyu, or making any pathetic excuses. I don’t intend to forgive you.” He glanced down at the photos scattered on the table and Mingyu followed, focusing on one of the pair out shopping; Joshua’s hand resting comfortably on Mingyu’s arm as the pair walked down the street, admiring boutiques. “But, I’m a businessman, not a thug. So, I intend to make a deal.” He motioned to the check, now slightly bent where Mingyu had gripped the edges. “In exchange for resigning your position here and never speaking to my son or this affair again, you can be given a comfortable, or at the very least, stable, life.” 

Mingyu’s eyes fell to the blank check in his hands once again, his mouth finally opening just slightly. Shit… “Sir, please, let me explain…” he said softly. 

Mr. Hong inhaled. For a long minute, his eyes closed, and he was silent. Mingyu felt his own heart beat slow down, as if making it any louder would rip through the quiet tension in the room. “Not only is the concept of this relationship unprofessional, but if word got out that the heir of this company was involved with not only someone else behind his fiancée’s back, but a man?” He shifted. “My family has worked too hard for my son’s hubris or your selfishness to tarnish that. While I want to handle this in a much different way, I know it will do me no good.” He finally glanced back at Mingyu, and the stare was intense. No longer softly amused or jovial. He looked at Mingyu with an intense, almost disgusted expression that made Mingyu feel numb. “Either way, you will not be continuing your position as Jisoo’s bodyguard, nor in this company. So it is up to you how you choose to part with us today. This-.” he pointed to the photo of the pair cuddled up, domestically window shopping in the Jeju shopping mall. His finger pressed so hard on the paper that Mingyu watched it crinkle. “Ends right here, right now, Mingyu…”

Mingyu closed his eyes, running a hand over his face. “Does he know you called me here?”

“That’s why I sent him and Namjoo on another trip. Keep him away so he doesn’t interfere. By the time he’s home, you’ll be long gone.” he cocked an eyebrow. “We can’t allow this to go beyond this room, Mingyu. I’m sure you understand the position I find myself in.” Mr. Hong said. “And, despite it all, you have done plenty of good for this company; this family. I’m being generous, offering you such an opportunity rather than kicking you to the curb with nothing but the clothes on your back. Which I should do after how you’ve acted.”

Mingyu flinched a bit, looking down at the papers laid before him. The consequences of what was the biggest risk he’d ever taken in his life. The most panicked he’d ever felt in his life, yet still the most fulfilled. Arguably, even above all else, the happiest he’d ever been in his life. And here it was, about to be ripped out from under him, knocking him out of the orbital pull of Joshua Hong that felt so second nature by this point. 

“...What if I refused the money?” he asked softly, unaware the question even formulated out of the farthest depths of his brain. Mr. Hong’s eyes darkened, and Mingyu flinched back in his seat.

“Then, you leave with no job, no contact with my son, and no chance of ever working a livable job in this life or your next. If you think you can reason with or blackmail me into changing my mind, you are wrong.” Mr. Hong leaned forward in his chair. “If you don’t make the only decision, the right decision, it won’t be long before you’re evicted from your home and your sister is removed from school.”

Mingyu’s heart stopped beating then. Even thinking of his sister’s downtrodden face, of seeing her struggle in ways they never should have in the past, and he swore she’d never experience again. He blinked back tears, nodding his head in understanding as he looked away. 

The blank check felt heavy in his hand, and he gripped it tightly, swallowing hard. Opportunities well beyond his imagination sat in the palm of his hand right now… opportunities that would make every struggle feel par for the course. Losing his mother at a young age, being the second parent to his sister, loneliness in his academic world, which he abandoned the second his father fell ill and died. Working his ass off for years just to make sure his sister had a roof to come home to on school break, that she had a school break to enjoy! 

“So, Kim Mingyu…” Mr. Hong said after a long minute. “What will you do?” 

Mingyu inhaled, looking down at the check in his hands.

Jeonghan saw Joshua just as he walked in, immediately lifting his hand to signal him as if he wasn't the only patron of the place. “Joshuji!” He called.

Joshua sank into the seat across from him, crossing his arms. “I have a feeling you weren’t subtle about coming out this morning at all.”

Jeonghan glanced towards the window, the mere gesture making the curious fans outside start squealing. He snickered. “I didn’t even notice them after you walked in.”

“Oh, please.” Joshua rolled his eyes, unable to hide the hint of an amused smile. He shifted. “I see the modeling is going well.”

“Well enough,” Jeonghan said, tilting his head as he leaned back in his chair. “My parents ask when you’re going to come by again.”

“Do they?” Joshua glanced down at the menu. 

“Mhm.” Jeonghan leaned forward, pulling Joshua’s attention as he rested on his elbows. His lips curled into a playful smile. “So do I.”

Joshua rolled his eyes. “Shut up.”

“What? Do you think my bed being consistently empty is funny or something?” 

“I didn’t come here to hook up with you.”

“Well, no, that’s why I can call a cab back to my hotel.” Jeonghan teased, and Joshua managed an amused laugh. 

“Enough, Jeonghan, drop it.” 

Jeonghan whined in defeat, leaning back in his chair once again and taking a long sip of his coffee. “You’ve never shut down my advances so quickly before.” He teased. Joshua looked back down at his menu. “What? Is there someone else?” The lack of reply made Jeonghan hum. “There is, hm? Must be serious if you’re not amusing me… Is he cuter than me?” 

“Yes, Namjoo is. But you knew that.” 

Jeonghan threw his head back to laugh. “Alright, fine. I fold. You’re so cute, Joshuji.” When Jeonghan shifted, Joshua finally looked up just in time to see a small envelope cross the table. “Here.” He said. 

Joshua took the envelope, reading the neat ‘J.H.’ in Jeonghan’s handwriting on the back. He looked up at Jeonghan again, who was focused on the menu once more. 

“What’s inside that we had to meet in person for it?” he asked, tentatively lifting the flap of the envelope. A few folded-up papers were waiting inside. “You could have mailed it to me.”

“Did you forget I was just trying to get you to sleep with me?” Jeonghan teased, breaking into a grin. “I didn’t look inside myself. But my friend in California said he managed to find some potential information on where your mother is employed.” 

“You’re kidding.” Joshua’s eyes widened. Jeonghan shrugged. Joshua looked down at the envelope again. He chewed on his lip, contemplative for a moment. Ultimately, he closed the flap and set it down on the table. 

“Probably not the best place anyway,” Jeonghan said, his voice now slightly softer and more compassionate. Joshua hummed in agreement, sipping his own coffee. “Now, about the guy you’re seeing-.”

“Can we drop it?!” Joshua gasped, eyes widening. “Why are you so concerned if I’m involved with someone or not?!”

Jeonghan shrugged. “It’s just obvious you’re seeing someone right now.” He grinned again. “You looked this cute when we were together, too.”

“Oh, don’t stroke your ego, we were never together.” Joshua scoffed. 

“Not like this guy?” Jeonghan asked. Joshua clicked his tongue, crossing his arms over his chest. Before any more teasing could be heard, the door to the cafe opened and both of them turned around to see one of Jeonghan’s guards attempting to hold back a man in a black tank top and grey sweats. Despite the rag-tag bedhead look, the man was pointing inside, directly at Joshua.

Joshua blinked, looking past the bedhead in the man’s face as it was brushed back. “...Mingyu?!” He gasped, making both men at the door look over. He huffed, waving his hand. “He’s fine. That’s my bodyguard.”

With Jeonghan’s confirmation, Mingyu was released, and he hurried over to the table. Joshua shot up from his seat, watching as Mingyu doubled over to catch his breath. Joshua clenched his fingers at his sides to keep from patting down Mingyu’s bed head. “I thought you’d still be asleep…” he said softly. 

When Mingyu finally stood straight again, his eyes locked on Joshua, exhaling a deep sigh of relief as he doubled over again. “Oh my god, I was so worried, Sir!” Mingyu gasped. Joshua saw his eyes still shaking as he caught his breath. “I was worried this time you got kidnapped for real!”

Joshua’s eyebrows furrowed at the comment as Jeonghan snickered behind him. “What?”

Mingyu blinked, his cheeks flushed red in embarrassment. “Yester- y’know what, never mind.” He looked Joshua over immediately. “Thank God you’re okay.”

Joshua huffed, avoiding his eyes as he felt his ears burn. “I’m just fine.”

Mingyu exhaled, tilting his head back. “I ran out of the room - my room -  as fast as I could.” 

Joshua chuckled, eyeing his guard’s choice of clothes.

“I see. Not exactly ‘on duty’ attire here.” He teased. Mingyu scoffed, his eyes finally locking on Joshua’s breakfast guest. 

Jeonghan stood up, dusting his pants off and fixing his T-shirt. He walked over, slinging his arm around Joshua’s shoulder. “So you’re Joshuji’s bodyguard I’ve heard so much about, hm?” he asked curiously. 

Joshua watched as Mingyu attempted to straighten himself out, bowing. “Yes. You’re Yoon Jeonghan, right? The model?”

“Want an autograph?” he asked, eyebrows raised over his head. Mingyu chuckled nervously.

“My sister might.” 

Jeonghan nodded his head, turning his attention to his assistant, who was waiting patiently with tea and a newspaper at another table for Jeonghan to finish the morning’s shenanigans. Jeonghan turned back to Mingyu and smiled. “Don’t worry,” he said. “Nothing nefarious was happening this morning.” He patted Joshua’s shoulder as the younger of the two shot him a wide-eyed stare. The model ignored it with such ease that it was clear he saw the stare a lot. “Despite my best efforts.”

“Jeonghan!” He snapped. “What the hell-.” 

“I gotta go, Joshuji. I’ll see you later.” He grinned. “Enjoy the rest of your stay, and call me.” With a teasing wink, his assistant walked over. Jeonghan passed a signed photo to Mingyu before he headed out of the cafe. The overtake of fans was heard shouting and snapping photos for the few moments he was led to his waiting car. 

Joshua sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. He looked back down at the table, grabbed the envelope, and put it in his bag. When he looked at Mingyu, he was admiring the autograph in his hands, a bit starstruck. “We should go back to the hotel,” he said softly. Mingyu glanced over, nodding.

As the duo started down the street, neither spoke. Joshua could feel the weight of his envelope in his bag and couldn’t help but wonder when would be a good time to look inside. Would there be a good time? Would it even help with anything, fill in any pieces? How much information could his mother’s college history provide in the grand scheme of things?

Joshua’s thoughts were interrupted by Mingyu's snickering, and he looked over. “What?” Joshua asked curiously, and Mingyu looked over.

“...Joshuji?”

Joshua let out a dry chuckle, eyes cast down to the floor as he walked. “It’s from when we were eight.” He said. “What a lunatic…” 

----------------

The rest of the day played out as the duo had planned. They wanted to do souvenir shopping. Dressed up in their most casual attire, the pair started off to the massive shopping mall; a choice Joshua was particularly pleased with earlier in the trip because he also had never been here before. He buys his clothes and cosmetics at expensive boutiques, so this is a new experience for him as much as for Mingyu.

Mingyu almost rolled his eyes at the comment, but his mind was focused on something else regarding Joshua. On how his demeanor seemed to do a complete one-eighty from the rest of the trip. Ever since returning back to the house from his meeting, Joshua seemed much quieter, much more lost in thought. The pair lounged around for the rest of the morning before hunger pulled them out into the streets once again, and to the mall specifically. He hoped it would work to lift Joshua’s spirits, but so far, nothing. 

“I was thinking of getting Minyeong a snowglobe or something,” Mingyu said, pointing towards the shelf that welcomed them when they walked in. He had hoped the topic would start lifting Joshua’s spirits a bit. -“For her dorm room. What do you think?”

Joshua hummed, pursing his lips together. He dug into his wallet, passing his black card over wordlessly. “Get whatever you want,” he said simply, and Mingyu watched him head over to the wall of different shirts. Mingyu’s lips dipped in a frown, but he silently walked towards the shelves in the opposite direction.

The store wasn’t very big, just a small corner shop in a much larger and busier mall. But that made it all the easier for Mingyu to catch glimpses at Joshua. He was lingering by the clothes, staring with an unreadable expression at the corny tourist shirts and hoodies as if he were going to buy them. Mingyu could see him staring right through the shelf, his eyes anywhere but the goods in front of him. When he turned towards another aisle, Mingyu took a few steps closer, grabbed the snow globe for his sister, and slipped towards the display shelf lined with cute, animal-themed keychains. 

As Mingyu scanned the selection, he kept his gaze on Joshua. Watching as he moved around the store, hands in his pockets. He wasn’t really looking at any intensely, just browsing. Maybe he was ready to leave. Mingyu looked down at the keychains one more time, pulling one off the rack. A small brown teddy bear with an orange on its head, and JEJU written along the white lanyard piece. It was cute.

As Mingyu tugged the keychain off the rack, he felt eyes searing directly into his back. Immediately, he stood up a bit straighter, furrowing his eyebrows. Was Joshua watching him? Quickly, Mingyu turned his head, staring at the cashier and the woman she was ringing up. A few paces from them was an old man reading a Jeju Tourism Booklet and a few kids running to their mothers with stuffed animals in their hands. Nothing unusual. 

Mingyu huffed, trying his best to shake off the weird feeling of eyes seeping into his skin as he returned his focus to the keychains at hand. He must be overthinking himself a bit, after all, he and Joshua are being pretty casual this weekend. Nothing like their expected bodyguard and boss relationship. He had to admit, it made his heart rate increase just a bit. 

“I thought you were getting her a snow globe.” Joshua’s voice called, cutting through Mingyu’s thoughts. He approached Mingyu’s side, putting all of his weight on one foot. 

Mingyu exhaled. “I am.” He held up the keychain, letting it dangle between his fingers. “I’m getting this for you.”

Joshua’s eyes softened on the keychain in front of him. He chuckled, putting his hands on his hips. “Really?” he questioned. When Mingyu nodded, Joshua’s nose tinted pink. “Well… okay then.” he turned towards the shelf himself, pressing himself to Mingyu’s side. He reached forward, scanning a few options. Mingyu couldn’t help himself; the feeling of Joshua resting so casually against him caused his hand to slip at his waist, gently looping his fingers into the belt loop. He watched as Joshua browsed the options, his eyes just a bit brighter than they were before.

“Are you getting one for me too?”

Joshua scoffed, eyebrows raising. “You’re pretty cocky to assume I’m getting you a gift.”

Mingyu’s heart settled a bit as Joshua’s mood improved, watching his eyes look at the gift Mingyu was getting for him before turning back to the selection at hand. “Then who is the keychain for?”

Joshua didn’t answer, pursing his lips in a playful pout. Finally, he tugged a similar teddy bear with orange swim trunks on, and the same white lanyard and writing stitched into it. He glanced at Mingyu. “Do you like this one?” he asked.

Mingyu nodded his head. “I do,” he said. Joshua looked down, and Mingyu leaned forward, his chin resting gently on Joshua’s head for just a second, pulling away before the feeling could really manifest into something comfortable. 

It was a good thing he did, too, because the second he pulled away, something that resembled the sound of a shutter went off behind them. Mingyu’s shoulders tensed, immediately turning his head towards the cash register once again. What once showed an old man and a few rowdy kids now showed nothing, not even a customer at the register. Mingyu narrowed his eyes, his arm retracting from Joshua’s waist and slipping back into his pocket. He looked over at the mall itself, which only catches glimpses of foot traffic. 

“We should go,” he said, turning back to Joshua. “Let’s go pay.”

Joshua must have sensed Mingyu’s hesitancy, because he frowned. “Everything alright?”

“Hm? Yeah,” he assured. “I just think it’s time we go.” He gently took the keychain from Joshua and turned back to the cashier. “Okay?”

“Uh… alright.” 

The pair walked to the register, Mingyu quickly paying with Joshua’s card before passing it back over to him, along with the little bag containing their purchase. Without another word, he quickly led Joshua out of the shop and back towards the exit they had come from. “Seriously, is everything alright?” Joshua asked, turning his head back to the shop in hopes of getting a glimpse of what had Mingyu suddenly so jumpy.

“Yes,” Mingyu said. “I just think we should go back to the house,” he said, looking at Joshua. “And maybe order dinner tonight.” 

—------------------

The pair did as Mingyu suggested, and ordered dinner to the house from a really nice restaurant. The pair settled onto the balcony in Joshua's room to enjoy. The moon was right in view, and the breeze was nice. They could hold hands and flirt without worrying about prying eyes. 

In Mingyu’s opinion, it beats a fancy restaurant any day. But still, even watching as Joshua sipped his wine and admired the stars from across the table, Mingyu couldn’t stop thinking about the mall. About the feeling that he was being watched several times throughout the weekend. Was it really just his paranoia talking? 

A shutter across the table went off, and Mingyu perked up, turning to Joshua as he set his phone down. The older one smiled behind his wine glass.

“You look good right now,” he said simply.

“Mm…” Mingyu smiled. “So do you.”

Joshua leaned back, running a hand through his hair. “Then take a photo.” He teased, and his nose crinkled when Mingyu did just that. 

“I’m sad this is the end of our trip,” Mingyu said as a bite of food slipped into his mouth. Joshua’s smile fell just a bit, setting his glass down and nodding his head. 

“Yeah…” he said softly. “I am too.” 

“Are you feeling better?” Joshua eyed him at the question, picking up his own chopsticks and bringing a bite to his lips. He nodded his head.

“Yeah…” he said, his voice a bit softer. “For now.” 

Joshua retired to their room after dinner, that same solemn behavior slowly creeping back onto his features as Mingyu led him back inside and closed the balcony door. Despite it all, Mingyu couldn’t really blame him. It was the last day of their trip, and Mingyu was sad to say he wasn’t ready for it to end. In the long weekend that the two had to themselves, it was chill. He could get used to this domesticity, waking up and making breakfast with Joshua before going out together for the day. Coming home late and watching the sunset over dinner before tangling up in bed and doing it all again the next day. Despite Mingyu’s lingering concerns, they remained under the radar enough not to be recognized by anyone. But reality was waiting for them both on the plane early the next morning. 

Mingyu set the empty dishes in the sink to be done the next morning before hopping in the shower. It was just what he needed, his muscles loosening under the steamy water as music played through his phone’s speaker. When he finished, Mingyu tossed the used towel in the little wastebasket at the corner of the bathroom before walking to the door that conjoined both of their rooms. He pressed his ear to the door, listening for sounds of life on the other end. But there was nothing; no TV, no chatter. It was very quiet. 

He must have fallen asleep. He thought to himself, slowly pulling back and heading back into the kitchen. He brewed himself a cup of coffee and leaned against the counter, watching as it trickled into the cup. He kept glancing up to the stairs to their room, wondering if he’d stagger out at any moment. But he didn’t. 

Mingyu didn’t expect the last night of the vacation to be spent alone. But Joshua could use the rest, so he wouldn’t push it. 

The couch welcomed him fully as he sank onto it, putting the coffee cup on the end table and grabbing the remote. After a while, lazily flipping through the channels seemed to be enough to start lulling the bodyguard to sleep. Mingyu felt himself blink awake several times, with different shows on the screen each time. An action movie he’s seen a million times was playing when he finally looked at the clock. 11:45 flashed back at him, and he knew it was going to be time for bed soon. Just a bit longer in this movie, then maybe-.

Footsteps padded down the stairs, and Mingyu glanced over. Joshua was making his way down, still in his sleepwear, a pair of loose shorts and an oversized T-shirt that was once Mingyu’s. His hair was messy, and one hand was trying to pat it down.

“Hyung.” Mingyu sat up a little straighter. Joshua didn’t move, leaning his side on the doorframe, his hands crossed over his chest. Mingyu tilted his head. “You okay?”

“Mmm.” Joshua looked at the TV. “What are you watching?”

“An episode of that show, Imitation, from a few years ago.” He watched as Joshua stepped into the room, his eyes still trained on the TV. “Did you sleep okay?”

Joshua looked over. “I didn’t sleep.”

Mingyu blinked. “You didn’t? I haven’t heard anything from your room since we finished dinner.” 

“Doesn’t mean I was asleep. I was on the balcony.” He finally reached Mingyu’s side, plopping down on the couch with a significant amount of distance between them. No coy cuddling up against him, or enticing him over to the other end of the couch. Hell, he didn’t even comment on Mingyu’s lack of a shirt and freshly showered appearance. He’d be offended if he wasn’t confused. 

The duo sat in silence for a while, watching the movie without so much as a word. Mingyu would occasionally sneak glances, but Joshua’s eyes were trained on the movie. As if he were almost hypnotized. “Alright.” Mingyu sighed, setting his half-finished coffee cup on the end table again. The sound of him sliding along the couch was enough to get Joshua to finally pull his eyes from the screen, watching as Mingyu settled down beside him. “What’s wrong with you?”

Joshua clicked his tongue, eyes narrowing a bit. “Damn, okay. Rude.”

“You know what I mean.” Mingyu shook his head. “You seem pissed.”

“Now I am.”

“Hyung.”

“What’s the problem? Am I bothering you?” Mingyu didn’t answer right away, and Joshua turned his gaze back towards the movie. 

“I just… want to make sure you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.” 

Mingyu propped himself up on the couch. His arms rested behind his head as he looked down at the other. Maybe he was trying to see if the action would entice Joshua, because it wasn’t very comfortable. But no luck. “Something wrong with stuff back home?”

“Always.” Joshua’s arms tightened over his chest more. As if he were protecting something. Mingyu reached down, carefully undoing his arms like a knot in a piece of rope. His arms fell into his lap, but he didn’t meet his gaze. 

Mingyu shifted. “For someone who is usually very good at putting on a front, you’re terrible at hiding right now.” He said simply. “Why are you choosing now to be cold to me, when I just want to help?” 

Joshua pursed his lips together. Finally, he huffed, his head pressing back against the couch. “You didn’t tell me what had you so jumpy when we were out today. I’ll remind you.” Mingyu frowned, a jab of truth in Joshua’s words. “Besides, I have nothing to say,” he admitted. “I just… want to sit and watch TV.” 

Mingyu paused, his own hands lowering to his lap as Joshua looked back at the screen. Mingyu followed his gaze, clicking his tongue. “Alright,” he said gently. One hand reached out, grabbing hold of Joshua’s arm and pulling it onto his lap just before they could re-knot themselves. “Then we’ll watch the show.” 

The duo sat in silence for a while, watching through the middle 20 minutes of the most recent episode. Mingyu only looked from the screen when he felt Joshua’s fingers twitching in his hand, watching as they tapped against Mingyu’s palm. He’d kept Joshua’s arms from crossing since they fell into silence, and that meant keeping Joshua’s hand in his grip for the time being. He opened his hold a bit, watching as Joshua’s finger continued to move. Like a metronome set on fast forward, Mingyu watched as the tapping finger sped up every few seconds, almost drilling a hole into one spot of Mingyu’s palm. When his eyes flickered to see if his expression matched his movement, it certainly did. 

Joshua was chewing on his bottom lip, his eyes fixated on the screen but not at all focused on the movie. It seemed all of his movement was focused on that one finger, because if it wasn’t, his entire body would be vibrating. 

Mingyu closed his hand over Joshua’s finger again, tightening on the digit until it stopped moving altogether. Joshua’s breath hitched, like he was pulled out of a trance, and when the duo made eye contact, Mingyu’s hand loosened. 

“Was I bothering you?” His voice sounded a bit softer the second time he had asked. Mingyu shook his head. 

“No,” he assured. Mingyu’s other hand came up, raking back Joshua’s bangs. “What’s got you so fidgety? Did something happen this morning with Yoon Jeonghan? You’ve been in a funk since then.”

“Jeonghan? What? No.” Joshua shook his head. “No, nothing like that.” He seemed to lean into Mingyu’s hand. 

“Nobody bites a hole into their lip and taps their fingers so intensely if it’s nothing.”

“I just have a lot of work to do when we get back. Happy?”

A tightness in Mingyu’s shoulders loosened, and they fell a bit. “Oh.” 

“Yeah. Oh. It's nothing.”

“Well, if it’s paperwork or numbers, you’ll get it done. I can check your math.” Joshua scoffed, tilting his head back into the waiting hand once more. 

“No. Junhui called me and said I have like… 4 different appearances I need to make with my father next week. That’s why I was back on the balcony.”

“Really? Already?” 

“Mmm. One at a quarterly meeting, a gala thing, a press conference, and he wants me to go with him to the fucking opera.”

“The opera?” Mingyu tried hard not to snort.

“Yeah.” He groaned. “I hate the opera. He hates the opera!”

“Then why-.” 

“There’s a million reasons.” He expressed. “Because I’m on vacation is the most likely. Wants me to make up for lost time.” he nodded. “He probably also wants me to show my face as much as possible because this trip is one to help me relax. I’m sure he’s going to make it some huge deal.” He shook his head. “He probably agreed to me going as easily because he knew he could milk it for all it’s worth when I get home tomorrow. My first meeting is at 10, so I have to go straight from the plane.” 

“We have to go.” Mingyu corrected quickly. Joshua looked over at him, nodding in agreement. He leaned back against the couch and kicked one leg over the other. “Is that all that’s bothering you?” Joshua hummed, pursing his lips together. He seemed to start closing back in on himself, but Mingyu immediately reached out. “Are you sure nothing happened this morning?”

“Yes.”

“Hyung, I can’t protect you if you don’t tell me what you need protecting from,” Mingyu stressed. 

Joshua sighed, head falling limp against the back of the couch. He rubbed his temples. “I met Jeonghan because he said he had information about my mother from when he was in Los Angeles.” 

Mingyu’s mouth fell open. “Oh.”

“I knew you’d say that.” Joshua grimaced. He sighed, digging into the little pocket in his shorts and pulling out the envelope he had this morning. “I came here to meet him and get it. And now that I have it, I don’t know if I want to open it.”

“What’s in there?” 

“He said it had something to do with her employment. I don’t know, as I said, I don’t know if I want to open it. For all I know it could just be a pay stub with a name I don’t recognize. Maybe a photo of the place? It could be nothing…”

“Why not?” Mingyu asked curiously. Joshua flipped the envelope over, seemingly studying the bit of writing on the back.

“I don’t care about this shit anymore.” 

“Hyung…” Mingyu said softly.

“No, seriously. I’m over it.” He tossed the envelope on the floor, watching it flutter down to their feet. Mingyu frowned, his arm settling behind Joshua’s head as he tugged one of his legs up onto the couch, resting his chin on his knee. 

“You can’t mean that, can you?”

“I do. I thought about it all day. What could possibly be there? How can I know it’s even her? I don’t even know her maiden name. Or if Jane is even her real name! I know none of it! I’ve spent the better part of a decade trying to find a woman who feels like she doesn’t exist! I have more important shit to worry about in my life.”

“But-.”

“It’s really not a big deal. Besides, how am I getting to her? I don’t have my passport, and I’d never get the okay. I’d have to wait until my father’s dead in the dirt and by then I’ll …. God, who even fucking knows?” He huffed, his shoulders tensing with every word.

“Hyung…”

Joshua looked over at him. “There must be a reason I’ve never turned up any information on her, you know? There must be something I haven’t realized until now, just been to stupid. It took me a decade of wasting both mine and Jeonghan’s time to realize that. Maybe for once in my fucking life my father was right, and-.”

“I don’t think you mean that.” “Trust me I don’t want to say it either! But maybe he was.” Joshua insisted. “Maybe, I don’t know. He was the one who knew her, not me.” His voice cracked a bit at the last word and he shook his head. “I mean what if I do find her and she’s dead?! Or… or she like… left me? What then? What if I’ve done all of this and she didn’t want anything to do with this in the first place?!” Joshua immediately dropped his leg back down and turned his head. “It wouldn’t be the first time but Christ…”

“But at least you’ll know.” He said. “You should’ve known a long time ago.” He thought back to when his own father had sat him and Minyeong down, barely old enough to register the full range of human emotion, to learn that their mother wasn’t coming back to the house. To learn that she had died, and not once before that thought to find them again. “It hurts but it’s better to know then wonder for your entire life, no?”

Joshua glanced down at the envelope, pushing it away with his toe. “I just don’t want to deal with it right now…” he said softly. 

Mingyu was silent for a minute. He saw Joshua’s eyes prick red, but he immediately swallowed. He tried so hard to school his expression and bite back any emotion. It was clear he’d already shown too much in his mind. Mingyu gently reached forward, pulling Joshua down until his head was resting on Mingyu’s lap.  He glanced up, and Mingyu simply passed over the remote. 

“Here,” he said gently. “Put something on. Okay? Whatever you want.” Joshua’s eyes followed Mingyu as he managed to dim the lights and grab a throw blanket to toss over them, before settling back onto the couch. Joshua was silent for a second, but ultimately began flipping through the channels. When Mingyu’s hand reached to his arm, gently rubbing the skin, Joshua’s body finally started to relax. 

“Don’t let these things ruin the last night of the trip, okay? You’re supposed to be here to relax. I’ll probably be the one who gets in trouble if you go home even more tense than you left.”

Joshua chuckled. “Trust me. Despite what you just saw, nothing could be bad enough to ruin this trip.”

----------------

The buzz of Mingyu’s phone startled him awake, and he blinked. The light illuminated the room, which had all but darkened with the TV now turned off. He groaned, rubbing his eyes as he lolled his head up. There was a crick in it from the awkward angle, and a hand immediately lifted up to rub at it. 

The first thing he saw illuminated by the phone light was Joshua, sprawled out on his lap and snoring lightly. The remote had fallen out of his hand and landed somewhere on the floor, but he was none the wiser. Mingyu sighed, finally reaching over and grabbing the phone. He didn’t even bother checking the Caller ID before answering: “Hello?” he groaned.

“Mingyu?”

Mingyu tensed, his entire body immediately snapping awake at the sound of his boss on the other end. “M-Mr. Hong? Sorry, I had fallen asleep.”

“I tried calling Jisoo several times since dinner time, but haven’t gotten a response.” 

Mingyu looked down at his lap, where Joshua shifted a bit, but remained asleep. He sighed, reaching down and gently rubbing at his back. 

“He fell asleep pretty soon after dinner, Sir,” he said softly. “He was very busy this weekend.” He nodded as Mr. Hong continued to speak. “Yes, Sir. I think the trip did wonders for him. He really seemed to relax while he was here. He’ll come back to work refreshed tomorrow.”

Mingyu nodded as Mr. Hong continued to speak, watching as Joshua slept soundly just beneath him. “Yes, Sir. I’ll have him up early and on his flight, don’t worry. Yes. Okay, goodnight.” And he waited for the phone to go dead. A sigh escaped his lips before he gently reached down and shook Joshua. “Hyung,” he whispered. Joshua’s brows furrowed in his sleep, clearly annoyed. “Hyung. Wake up, we should move to the bed.”

“Mmmm…” Joshua groaned, eyes fluttering open. He sat up on the couch, rubbing his eyes. “What time is it?”

“Just about midnight,” he said softly. He stood up from the couch, tossing the remote back. “Come on, let’s get some sleep. We have to be up at 8 tomorrow.” 

Joshua nodded, standing up as well. He leaned on Mingyu’s shoulder, groaning sleepily as the pair headed over to the bed. 

----------------

It was late at Hong International. Most people had already gone home, sans the overnight crew and the handful of overachievers. Seungcheol was neither, at least not normally. But here he was, sitting in his office with his third coffee, looking over applicants for security personnel. He knew they’d need a new wave of hires soon, since the amount of turnover was growing more recently. 

Seungcheol finally decided it was time to head home at midnight, leaving the rest of the work for the Seungcheol who would be just as tired in six hours. 

He did one final sweep of the floors, making sure the graveyard shift guards were doing what they were supposed to and everything was in order. As he was just about to head to the elevator, though, he heard something coming out of Mr. Hong’s room. He couldn’t help himself as his pace slowed to a stop and he listened to the small crack in the office door. 

“This is more than enough, thank you.” From the lack of response, Seungcheol could only assume Mr. Hong was on the phone with someone. But he kept listening. “Have them printed and in my office first thing tomorrow morning. I need to get everything together before they land tomorrow morning.”

Seungcheol blinked. He didn’t need to hear names before his heart sank right into his chest. It was clear who Mr. Hong was talking about. His eyes widened a bit, but his curiosity only encouraged him to listen more.

“I knew something like this was going on.”

“After everything you’ve done for him, too. He continues to run off behind your back. On your dollar.” It seemed Mrs. Hong was in the room as well, quiet until now. “It’s only a matter of time before rumors spread.”

“Don’t worry.” Mr. Hong said. “It’ll be handled before that happens.”

Seungcheol quietly snuck away from the door, tiptoeing until he was at the elevator. As the metal doors closed, he leaned against the wall, rubbing his face with his hands. A familiar sense of deja vu was drumming in his chest with what was to come. 

I’m sure you see reason, Choi Seungcheol. You know what the best decision will be. For everyone’s sake.

“I think I’m going to throw up.”

Joshua looked up from his magazine, readjusting the glasses on his forehead as he grinned. “You won’t throw up.”

“I think I might.” Mingyu leaned back in his seat, unable to keep his eyes from the window on the other side of Joshua. The plane was still on the runway, not yet ready to take off, as people were still getting into their seats and the flight attendants were making their rounds before takeoff. That left Mingyu plenty of time to panic. 

“Mingyu, I’ve been on many planes before,” Joshua said, closing his magazine and setting it on his lap. He rested his elbow on the armrest between them, leaning onto his hand and watching as Mingyu tensed up with every slight movement of the plane. “You’ll be just fine.” 

Despite Joshua’s best efforts, Mingyu was not convinced, his fingers curling tighter into the arm rest he glanced out the window again. The plane began to roll, and he tilted his head back against the rest, groaning. 

“Listen, I know it’s my job to look after you and go with you places, but why couldn’t you have asked Chan to come with you on this one?”

Joshua chuckled in amusement. “Because I wanted you to come.” He said simply. “I’ve wanted to get you on a vacation with me for months now. And honestly, I need a break. Jeju is gorgeous this time of year.”

“You can’t be too careless,” he said. “How the hell did you not set off any alarm bells? Not even Junhui-hyung is coming.”

“I had mentioned to my father that I was meeting one of our clients here since he’s in Korea for a vacation,” Joshua said simply. “Told my father it would be my treat since I’m taking a little trip.” Joshua shrugged. “I told Junhui to take his own vacation.” He said. “Boost morale, encourage moral health. Chan, too.” His hand dipped forward, gently brushing against a lock of Mingyu’s hair. “So we’ll make sure to enjoy our vacation too, okay?”

Mingyu tilted his head to the side momentarily, a faint smile on his lips. Joshua copied the movement, pulling back just in time for the plane to shake once more and Mingyu’s entire body to jolt back to attention. “I just don’t want you to get into trouble with your father. This is risky.”

“Please.” Joshua scoffed. “He’s always finding ways for me to get in trouble with him. If he yells at me for not meeting with the client and just going on a shopping spree, it won’t be the first time, trust me.” Mingyu pursed his lips, but ultimately nodded his head. “Jumping back to you, I would have figured you would be into all of the math and engineering that goes into getting a plane off the ground, you know? There must be tons of numbers and… like… equations and stuff. Think about that to calm down.”

“Well, the entire thing is fascinating,” Mingyu said, perking up just a bit. “When you’re not the one inside.” Joshua’s nose crinkled, eyeing the magazine in his lap as he lazily flipped through the pages. “I hate heights.” Mingyu scowled.

“Mm… Good to know,” he teased. “Don’t worry. The hour will go fast.” 

Mingyu pursed his lips together, eyes lifting to the top of the plane as the captain came over the speakers and began talking. Flight attendants were shuffling to the aisles, and Mingyu simply closed his eyes. 

“If it makes you feel better, take-off is the worst part, and it’s not even that bad.”

“Yeah?” Mingyu cracked an eye open. Joshua nodded, not looking up from the magazine as the plane finally roared to life. Mingyu jolted, his hand gripping the armrest between them and looking out the window. He watched the plane pick up speed on the runway, and he felt his heart slam like thunder in his chest. “Jesus. I thought you said it wasn’t that bad!” He huffed when the plane shook, finally lifting off the ground. 

Joshua chuckled, finally reaching over and intertwining their hands, not once needing to look up. “Trust me, Mingyu.”

“I’m finding it very hard now.” 

----------------

Joshua booked a stunning villa right in the heart of Jeju, only a brief walk away from the beach and a quick drive from tons of tourist spots. Mingyu dropped his bags down in front of the door, taking in the large house. The ceilings reached the sky, held up by gorgeous wrap-around staircases. The kitchen to the right was about the size of his apartment, with a large middle island and everything. The living room had a perfect view of the large pool through the ceiling-length windows. He couldn’t help but be pulled in that direction, staring out the windows in awe. He pushed the door open and stepped outside. The water - both in the pool and on the beach - looked crystal clear, like he could see the bottom of it even from a distance. The sea-salty air felt gorgeous on his skin. 

“You like it?” Mingyu turned his head to the sound of footsteps, watching as Joshua leaned against the frame of the door. He had a change of clothes in his hand, hoping to rid himself of his button-up and slacks as soon as possible, with a baseball cap brushing his newly grown bangs back. Mingyu’s eyes fell towards the newly spotted hairs starting to grow back as they popped out from under the cap. Joshua slipped his hand in his pocket, glancing around. “It’s nice, right?”

“It is.” Mingyu immediately reached his arm out, welcoming Joshua into his hold. He glanced over his shoulder as his hand instinctively curled into Joshua’s grip. “That’s a nice pool.”

“Mmm. It’s got a built-in hot tub and everything.” Mingyu whistled, looking down at Joshua as the older leaned against him. “We should definitely go in.”

“Mmm.” Mingyu looked towards the pool again. “We should. But we should unpack first and rest.”

“Rest? You slept the entire car ride here.”

“It was a trek walking to the car once we got off the plane, okay? I couldn’t feel my legs.” Joshua laughed, leading the way as the pair grabbed their bags and started towards one ofthe three large rooms in the villa. Mingyu caught sight of a large gym just off to the left of the stairs and what looked to be a gaming lounge as well. This place really did have everything. 

The bedroom was nothing to sneeze at either, a massive king-sized bed with an equally gorgeous balcony view and an ensuite bathroom. Mingyu set the bags down on the floor and looked around just as Joshua approached, his eyes already flickering in excitement.

He slipped a hand along Mingyu’s arm, batting his eyelashes up at him. “Shall we break in the bed before we go out and about? You’re not too tired for that, right?”

Mingyu laughed a bit. “You don’t plan to turn this entire trip into a sex vacation, do you?” Mingyu asked, already meeting Joshua in a kiss. He grinned when Joshua tugged him farther into the room.

“Would you argue if I said yes?” He asked curiously, already flicking open the first few buttons on Mingyu’s shirt. Mingyu pursed his lips together. He saw the bed approaching as the pair fumbled over to it, his eyes flickering with amusement as he playfully knocked Joshua back onto the plush mattress. He watched the older man's eyes widen in surprise.

“Guess not.” He said simply. “But I will absolutely be getting my payback for the shit you pulled on the plane.” 

It was still only the afternoon by the time the duo lay back in bed, clothes strewn about and breaths mingling together. Mingyu sighed, stretching his arms back over his head as he looked up at the ceiling. 

“So,” he said. “You’ve been to Jeju before.” Joshua glanced over, nodding his head. “Any idea what we should do first?”

In an instant, Joshua’s eyes lit up like two bulbs on a Christmas tree. He sat upright. “Wait here,” he ordered. Mingyu blinked, his eyes tracking Joshua as he navigated the room for his boxers and headed to his backpack. Mingyu propped himself to sit up, resting back on his palms as he watched Joshua navigate his unpacked belongings. In a few seconds, Joshua held up a small booklet with the company logo on the front. “I made a checklist,” Mingyu blinked, his lips curling into a grin. Joshua frowned as Mingyu broke into amused giggles. “What’s so funny?”

“You must have really been excited for this,” Mingyu said, reaching his arm out and motioning Joshua back towards the bed. He followed, crawling back under the covers and into Mingyu’s hold as he set the booklet between them. Mingyu’s head fell forward briefly, pressing a soft kiss onto it as he opened up the booklet to a flurry of different locations in Jeju, like some kind of tourist experiencing it for the first time. 

“There are a few really good clubs here,” he said. “And a few places to go shopping, and all of the best restaurants I’ve ever eaten at. Plus, all of the staple tourist stuff…” Mingyu watched as Joshua went through the entire checklist like clockwork, resting his head on top of Joshua’s and studying the way his eyes sparkled brighter the more he listed each thing off. 

The rest of their first day was spent sightseeing, checking off boxes like students on a school trip to all of the iconic Jeju spots. In the car Joshua rented, the duo drove around the island all day, marveling at the stone statues and historic buildings. Mingyu almost took the role of the tour guide, looping his arm around Joshua’s and explaining all of the things he knew about Jeju’s history. If Joshua didn’t know any better, he would have thought the man had grown up here. But he simply nodded his head, listening as Mingyu rattled on and on to him for the majority of the day. Joshua even managed to snap a few photos of him, honey-kissed skin shadowed by a baseball cap and loose tank top the focus of every single photo. All of the statues in the frame paled in comparison to Mingyu’s effortless appearance, and Joshua felt his lips quirk in a smile when Mingyu had finally caught him snapping photos and responded with an awkward smile and a peace sign. 

“What are you doing?” Mingyu asked with a laugh. 

“Taking a picture,” Joshua said simply. “What else am I supposed to do on a vacation?” 

---------------

The next morning when the pair woke up tangled up in bed, Mingyu looked around the room. It was still early, the sun just barely making its way to the horizon. If he had to guess through his sleep it was about four in the morning. They’d only crawled into bed at around one that same morning after finally leaving a club Joshua swore was safe. When he looked down, Joshua was still sound asleep, curled up under the covers with not a care in the world. Mingyu reached down, raking a hand through his hair. Joshua’s nose twitched, and Mingyu felt it would be blasphemous to do anything other than lean down and press a soft kiss on his forehead. He knew Joshua had more things planned that he wanted to do that day, and they’d definitely be out for a majority of the day. So, he wanted Joshua to get more than enough sleep.

Mingyu just barely got out of bed when he heard grumbling behind him. Turning his head, Joshua’s hand flew out, blindly patting around where Mingyu should still be. His eyebrows furrowed in his sleep and Mingyu had to turn and cover his face with his hand, physically restraining himself from taking a picture. Joshua would kill him. 

Instead, Mingyu leaned back onto the bed, his lips hovering just at Joshua’s forehead again, the same spot he’d just planted a kiss. “Go back to sleep, Hyung,” he breathed softly. Joshua only opened his eyes a bit, pouting up at him.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” He gurgled, voice heavy with sleep.

“I wanted to go downstairs to the gym.” He chuckled. “Want to come with me?” Joshua scoffed, reaching up and grabbing Mingyu by the neck, pulling him back down towards the bed. “Wha-! Hyung!” Mingyu laughed a bit.

“Come back to sleep, idiot,” he said. “Nobody goes to the gym on vacation.”

“But it’s in the house.” Mingyu pouted, but he was already crawling back to Joshua’s side, pulling him closer with a hand on his waist. Satisfied, Joshua allowed his head to fall back on the pillow, eyes closing and his hand loosely resting over Mingyu’s middle. Mingyu sighed, looking down as Joshua slowly began falling back asleep. “Alright, fine.” he said softly. 

Mingyu did stay in bed, turning the TV on low and watching it while Joshua continued to sleep comfortably beside, falling in and out of his own fits of sleep until lunch time. It was the first time Mingyu had done something like this in who knows how long, without an injury or day off to slate as the cause. It was just because he wanted to. And it was so nice. 

When the pair finally did wake up around noon, Joshua insisted the pair go out shopping, hitting every one of Joshua’s favorite stores to hit when he visited the island. Today was his turn to share stories, more rooted in modernity and capitalism than Mingyu’s very detailed history lessons the day prior. But just as Joshua watched every word leave his lips at the hiking trails and ruins, Mingyu listened intensely as Joshua talked about all of the fashion facts he knew. How he described different fashion empires, good and bad outfits and patterns, how he tried on tons of different options and even shoved some clothes Mingyu’s way, waving his black card around with a glint of excitement in his eye. The pair left three hours of shopping with arms full of bags being set in the car, and Joshua was beaming.

Mingyu watched out the window of the rental car as the pair drove back, admiring the glimmer of the ocean just over the cliffside. Joshua was humming to a song on the radio, focusing on the road ahead of him. 

“Did you have fun?” Mingyu asked. Joshua nodded.

“I did. But I need to take a nap, I’m exhausted.”

“We slept til noon.”

“Shopping makes me tired.” Joshua sneered. 

“Well, if you’re taking a nap, I want to use the gym,” Joshua whined, clearly expecting the pair to cuddle. “Aw, Hyung. When am I ever going to get to go into that gym again after this trip?”

“Whenever you want!” Joshua said. “I can take you here whenever, remember?”

“Which means we’ll also have plenty of time to nap together, too. We also do that all the time.” Joshua clicked his tongue. “Don’t worry, it won't be more than an hour.”

“An hour?!” Joshua’s eyes widened. 

Despite Joshua’s protests and very good attempts to coax Mingyu into bed with him, Mingyu simply bundled the older man under the covers and sat with him until he finally turned on his side and took a nap. Mingyu waited until his breathing evened and his body relaxed to head to his own room. Out of his suitcase he grabbed some workout clothes, and a water bottle he’d packed. With one more peek into the bedroom to make sure he was still asleep, Mingyu slipped out of the bedroom and jogged down the steps to the gym.

Despite clearly not being used very often, the equipment almost rivalled that of the gym at Hong Corporation itself. He marvelled at the shiny equipment and the large mirrors plastered around every wall. Mingyu dropped his duffle bag beside the weights he was planning to use and made sure to snap a few pre-workout selfies in the mirror. He looked around once more before finally putting on his headphones and getting to work. 

For the next hour, Mingyu allowed his mind to drift from reality and hit a state of adrenaline-heavy euphoria. He hadn’t had a lot of time to work out like he used to now that he had a more frequent overnight guest at his apartment, making the few times he did work out a bit more of an adjustment than they used to be. But how on earth could he complain? Even now, had he been pulled back into bed this morning and missed another chance to work out in a very nice gym, he certainly wouldn’t have complained.

Domesticity was something Mingyu didn’t ever expect to have at all, much less like this. Waking up next to the same person almost every day and falling asleep with them every night. Having someone waiting to see him after a long day at work, having someone to de-stress with. Even with the lack of actual dates the pair were able to go on, Mingyu found himself happy at the little life he and Joshua had somehow managed to create. 

Before Mingyu knew it, an hour had passed in his hopeless romantic thought bubble, the alarm ringing through his headphones. Mingyu was just finishing up on the treadmill. He exhaled, stopping the machine as he slowed from a consistent jog to a slow walk, gripping the side of the machine as he steadied himself and caught his breath. “Man.” he exhaled, popping his headphone out of his ear and reaching for his water bottle.

His head tilted back to take a long sip of water, working on getting his heart beat to stop slamming into his ears. Just as his body was beginning to come down from his adrenaline high, a chill ran through him. The air condition wasn’t on high, and the water wasn’t that cold. So what on earth could it be?

It hit him again and Mingyu shivered, his first instinct being to scan the room. Did Joshua come down to surprise him? Upon his inspection, that didn’t seem to be the case. He turned towards the door, but it was closed. He turned towards the windows, scanning the outside gardens and fences for any suspicious, but turning up empty-handed. Mingyu reached down for his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. With furrowed brows, Mingyu decided it would be best to head back, and ultimately left with hope to leave that weird chill behind as well. 

It was almost dinner time by the time he returned upstairs. He turned towards the door to the bedroom, still closed and seemingly untouched. He must be asleep. Mingyu thought to himself. Not wanting to disturb Joshua, he snuck into another bathroom to take his shower.

A warm shower was enough to melt away the chill that followed Mingyu to the hotel room, running a hand through his hair as drops of shampoo fell to his feet and mixed with the shower water. He couldn’t get the feeling that he was being watched out of his mind. Was he right to be concerned? Or was he living in a heightened state of nerves given what he and Joshua were doing? He inhaled, tilting his head back. 

“I should ask Joshua-hyung about it.” he murmured to himself, finally turning the shower off and stepping out. 

Once dried off, with a towel wrapped around his waist, Mingyu started towards the bedroom for dry clothes. He flicked the light on, turning to the bed to see it was empty. Mingyu blinked, staring at the scene for a second. “...Hyung?” he called, looking around. He poked his head into the bathroom, but that too was empty. 

Mingyu’s heart rate picked up, as he turned back into the bedroom, towards the balcony. “Hyung?” Mingyu walked towards the balcony, scanning through the darkening sky for a familiar slender frame and bicep tattoo. Nothing. “Where the hell did he go?” The house was big, but not that big. 

Mingyu turned his head towards the bed, as if like magic Joshua would be sprawled out and asleep, that Mingyu’s anxiety made him see what wasn’t really there. But instead, he caught sight of a piece of paper folded up and resting right in the middle of Joshua’s bed. 

“Aw fuck he’s been kidnapped.” Mingyu gasped, sinking down onto the bed and grabbing the letter. When the hell did someone sneak in? Who could have possibly snuck in?! Was that the weird presence he felt?! His headphones were in so he wouldn’t have heard thrashing or screaming! “Mr. Hong is going to kill me, I- oh.” Mingyu flipped open the letter to see Joshua’s beautiful handwriting waiting for him.

Pool. After the gym. Swimsuit optional ;)

Mingyu didn’t speak until his heart finally slowed down, and he let out a relieved ‘Augh!’ as he fell into the pillow. “Hyung, what the hell?!” He groaned into the pillow.

When the anxiety melted away and Joshua being kidnapped was no longer a viable option, Mingyu tugged on his swimsuit, grabbed another towel and headed downstairs to the pool. He reached the bottom of the stairs when he looked ahead at the backyard he walked right past earlier. The backyard lights were on, casting a glow on the pool and the lone figure swimming around inside. He smiled, walking outside and tossing his towel on one of the lounge chairs. 

“Was wondering when you’d show up.” Joshua chimed, swimming to the edge of the pool. Mingyu looked down at him, sinking down enough to let his toes graze the water. His nose scrunched at the cool sensation on his skin, and he looked back up to Joshua as he floated nearby. “You wore your swimsuit?” He asked, pouting in disappointment.

“You said it was optional.” Mingyu laughed. Joshua watched as Mingyu settled on the side, the water covering up just past his ankles as he sat down. “I thought you were sleeping.” He said.

“I was. Then I decided I wanted to go for a swim.” Mingyu huffed. It must have been him moving around that I sensed. He thought to himself, relief washing through him like a fresh dip in the pool as Joshua motioned him in. “Join me.” 

“I will.” Joshua huffed, pushing himself back to lie on his back and float. Low and behold, he was also in his swimsuit. Mingyu snorted. “You also wore your swimsuit?

“Never said it’d stay on for long.” Joshua teased, continuing to float farther and farther across the pool. Finally ready, Mingyu sank into the water, exhaling as the cold sensation hit his hips, stomach, and chest. Joshua finally stopped swimming away, kicking himself closer to Mingyu until the ripples brought them together. Mingyu leaned against the side of the pool, using one hand to tug Joshua up against his chest. 

“This is a nice pool,” Mingyu said, tilting his head up to admire the nighttime view. Joshua nodded in agreement. “Is this your parents' place, or-.”

“No, Junhui found it for me. If it were my father’s place, he’d be much more critical, and probably have people working here to keep an eye on me.” His hands gently glided along Mingyu’s chest, eyes tracking their movements as water spread along his skin. “It’s nice, right? He did a good job.” 

Mingyu nodded his head. “I was gonna suggest we take a walk on the beach or something together. But I like this better.”

“I don’t know if I would be the type to go on late-night beach walks,” Joshua commented, and Mingyu looked down at him. 

“Really? I figured you would be.” Joshua hummed, glancing over. “It’s romantic, and you do brand yourself as this perfect gentlemanly type to people.” Joshua chuckled. “I bet people think you take Miss. Noh on wonderful dates like that.” 

Joshua chuckled, but there was a hint of pain in his voice. “We’ve gone to a few places together,” he said. “The Maldives is one. We go to Japan a lot. Once we went to the Caribbean. Lots of beachy places. It’s expected,” he shrugged, finally putting some distance between them. “We come to Jeju a lot, too…” Mingyu hummed. “But it’s never a romantic trip.” 

“I know,” Mingyu assured. “I have no place to accuse anything…”  Joshua’s eyes cast away, and Mingyu reached back out, pulling at Joshua’s wrist just hard enough to get access to his palm and intertwine their fingers. Joshua didn’t respond; he only squeezed Mingyu’s hand tighter. “You’ve been to lots of places, right?”

“Mmm.”

“Even without Miss. Noh?” Joshua nodded. “I’ve always wanted to ask what they were like.” Joshua tilted his head back, looking up at the sky. “Like London. You were there less than a day before we first met. And yet I would have never guessed.”

“I really couldn’t pick up the accent,” Joshua said, smiling when Mingyu laughed. “There’s not much to say about it. My father sent me two years ago, saying it was for work purposes, but it’s because he didn’t want to have to deal with my bullshit.” He chuckled. “I think he found out I was involved with a guy who worked at another company just before I left.” He nodded. “Something like that.” 

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” He chuckled. “It was probably his most successful punishment ever. I was not lucky in London at all.”

“You’re kidding.” Mingyu gasped, eyes widening a bit. “I feel like you could get anyone you wanted anywhere in the world.”

“You flatter me, Mingyu.” Joshua rolled his eyes, eventually finding comfort back in Mingyu’s hold. “But nope. Just a handful in two years. I was also swamped in work, and had Mr. Lim basically breathing down my neck the entire time to make sure I didn’t go anywhere without him or Chan.” He sighed. “I’m so glad I don’t have that anymore. It was suffocating.”

For a minute, Mingyu studied Joshua. The way his face seemed to glow under the moonlight, the way his hands pressed securely against Mingyu’s chest. The way his eyes seemed to dim a bit with painful memories. Mingyu mused, looking around the pool. “Ah.” He shifted. “Watch this.”

Quickly, large hands snuck down to lock at Joshua’s hips, holding him up. Joshua seemed confused, looking through the surface of the water as Mingyu guided his hands to sit around his waist. He then gently pushed them off the wall, allowing them both to float directionlessly into the water. Joshua’s eyes widened, locking onto Mingyu’s neck. “Wh-what are you doing?” He asked.

“Floating.”

“We’re going to go under.” 

“Can you swim?” Mingyu asked.

“Tsk, of course I can! But what on earth are you-.” Joshua was interrupted by a brief kiss on the nose, stunned to silence as he stared at Mingyu. The taller smiled, before the lack of support keeping them afloat began weighing on them. The pair began tilting to one side, and Joshua looked around. “Mingyu,” he called. “Mingyu, get us upright.” He gasped when Mingyu’s hands only tightened on his waist. “Mingyu!” 

“Bye~.” Mingyu laughed, and the pair flipped under the water in an instant. 

It only took a few seconds for the duo to resurface, Joshua coughing as he shook out his hair. “Mingyu!” He shouted in frustration, watching the other surface as well with his hair covering his eyes. Joshua laughed, shoving him. “What was that for?”

Mingyu shrugged. “I just thought it would be funny.”

“I’m glad you thought my almost drowning was funny.”

“Oh, you’re so dramatic.” Mingyu rolled his eyes, swimming closer to Joshua again. The older swam back, waving his hands in front of him to prevent being subjected to yet another unexpected dip in the water. 

“Hey. Hey! Don’t you dare, don’t you da-.” Joshua’s back was up against the wall, and Mingyu watched his grin widen as the gap between them closed. Mingyu leaned forward, his hands once again settling on Joshua’s waist. The air between them shifted from playful to soft again, and Mingyu watched for those same doe eyes to flutter up at him.

“I’m glad you don’t feel suffocated anymore,” Mingyu said, brushing their noses together. He felt Joshua’s gaze on him, the hands holding his shoulders squeezing tightly. “I hope to keep it that way.” 

Joshua hesitated for a minute, nodding his head. “Yeah. Me too.”

Mingyu bit the inside of his lip, scanning Joshua’s face and the way his eyes now seemed to overpower the stars that were poking out above them. In an instant, he planted his feet on the bottom of the pool to secure them momentarily. Mingyu slid one hand up to brush wet hair out of Joshua’s eyes, before leaning in to plant a kiss on Joshua’s lips. Just as he pulled back for air, Joshua caught the distance and pulled him into yet another, much longer kiss. 

The pair couldn’t really remember getting back to their room between the kisses and Mingyu’s hurried footsteps, just that they stopped against almost every wall they bumped into to make-out just a few seconds longer. Mingyu just barely had the door closed with Joshua pushed against it when the older pulled back, eyes flickering up to him. Mingyu was silent, waiting to see if he’d interrupted their kissing to say something. His hands tightened on Joshua’s waist in anticipation.

Joshua’s hand locked the door behind him, his hold on Mingyu’s gaze staying firm. Finally, he spoke. “Mingyu…” he said.

“Hm?” Mingyu asked, leaning in just a bit more. 

“We should maybe go on that walk on the beach tomorrow,” he suggested softly. Mingyu felt something in his chest explode. Fondness maybe? He was starting to learn that Joshua was much more capable of being this level of adorable the more he was around him. 

Mingyu nodded his head as he closed the distance between them. “Absolutely,” he breathed, closing the distance in a kiss he knew he would never get tired of feeling. 

----------------

Here’s where I’ll be tomorrow morning. See you then, Joshuji~.

Joshua closed his phone as fast as the text message came in, setting it to the side just as Mingyu crawled into the bed beside him with the last of their meal. The take-out bags were settled on the bed in front of them, and Mingyu began fishing everything out. Joshua crossed his legs and watched, taking his meal into his hands. It was still warm, chicken stir fry from a place that Mingyu’s friend Seungkwan had apparently recommended to them when he learned of their vacation.

Flipping open the container the steam hit him in the face, and Joshua sighed softly. “This looks good.” He turned for Mingyu’s opinion, but the other was already three bites into his own meal. “Jesus, Mingyu.”

Mingyu looked over. "What?” He asked, swallowing. Joshua scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“You’re so lucky you’re cute,” Joshua said, finally taking a bite of his meal. He blinked, eyes sparkling. “Mingyu, why is it that whenever I’m with you, we get amazing food?!” He asked.

“I know right?! I need to tell Seungkwan this place is delicious!” Mingyu reached his chopsticks across the bed with a bite of pork and rice with smothered soy sauce on it. “Here. Have a bite.” Joshua leaned forward, biting into it and allowing the saltines sof the soy sauce and tenderness of the pork of mix well with the already lingering aftertaste of his own meal. 

“Mmm!” Joshua gasped, eyes widening even more.

“I know!” Mingyu gasped. Joshua wasted no time getting another bite across the way to Mingyu.

“You need to try this, too, then! It’s delicious!” Mingyu leaned forward, his canines flashing as he took a bite. A bit of it slipped from the chopsticks before it made it to Mingyu’s mouth, both of them snorting in laughter as Mingyu’s hand frantically reached out to catch it and fling it into his mouth that way. “Nice save.” Joshua laughed. Mingyu nodded proudly before taking another bite of his own food.

As the sun continued to set by them, the pair stayed cuddled up in bed, sharing the food they ordered and talking about the trip thus far. There was only one day left, yet it felt like they had been there for years. Joshua couldn’t understand how three days had already flown by, and that early the next morning he would need to be up and meeting Jeonghan to wrap it all up. 

Something gurgled inside his chest, and he set his container of half-eaten food onto his lap, biting his lip. He allowed Mingyu to ramble about his one school trip in high school to Gyeongbokgung and how he worked for months to save enough money and truly enjoy himself while on the trip. A small smile sat on his lips as he listened, nodding when appropriate and adding an occasional hum to the conversation. He allowed himself for the time being to relax in the moment, to let the world around them melt away and just enjoy being with Mingyu as if tomorrow wouldn’t come. 

But before he knew it, dinner and cleaning up, a wine bottle popped open and half-empty, and the pair found themselves tangled in bed, clothes discarded and legs interwoven with one another and breaths mingling into the quiet room around them. Joshua looked over to the window, watching as the moon now hung over them, a reminder that tomorrow was coming, and the day after, and with them, the end of their trip. 

“Mingyu.” He finally said into the quiet, closing his eyes as he felt the other roll onto his side. “Did you have a good vacation?”

Mingyu chuckled, soft but with just enough force for the breath to tickle Joshua’s ear.. “We still have a full day left.” He whispered. Joshua pouted, turning his head and opening his eyes just enough to narrow them instead.

“So far.” He emphasized. “Did you have a good vacation so far?”

Mingyu smiled, nodding his head. “Yes. It absolutely topped my trip to Gyeongbokgung as my favorite trip. So far.”

Joshua hummed, rolling on his side to face Mingyu and study him in the darkness. “Good…” he said softly. “I was hoping you’d say that.” 

----------------

Joshua had been awake for fifteen minutes before his alarm was set to go off. Maybe it was his internal clock, or his desire to keep the room quiet, but he rolled over in bed and grabbed his phone, immediately dismissing the alarm before it even had time to start. 

It was early, barely seven in the morning, and Joshua groaned. His body was heavy and tingly, a testament to the night before. Shaking out his hair, Joshua turned to the warm body next to him. Mingyu was sprawled out on his stomach, one arm dangling off the side of the bed as he snored peacefully into the mattress. 

Maybe he should tell him, maybe he should tell him how absolutely mortified he is to go see Jeonghan. How unsure he is about what he’ll be given, if it’ll even be worth his time. That wasn’t the point of this trip, the weekend he’d spent with Mingyu was and both of them knew that. But that didn’t stop Joshua from feeling uneasy. 

Hoping not to disturb him, Joshua got onto his feet, threw on his clothes, and watched Mingyu from the foot of the bed. It was still early enough that the blinds were able to block out most of the light streaming in from the balcony. With a gentle tug of the covers over one of Mingyu’s escaped feet, Joshua turned towards the door. He grabbed his phone, wallet, and the house key, and snuck out the door without so much as a peep. 

The ice stung when it was pressed against his cheek, and Jisoo immediately recoiled, putting his hand above the open wound on his cheek. When he looked up, Junhui stepped back, a bag of ice in his hand.

“Sorry, Hyung,” He’d settled himself on the bench beside Jisoo, passing over the ice without another word. Jisoo looked down at it, blinking slowly as the chill began seeping into his palm. “Does it hurt?”

“Like a bitch.” he scoffed. “He really got me good.” 

Jisoo and a boy in his class had gotten into a fist fight in the East Wing earlier that day, just as lunch was coming to an end. The duo were grabbing and punching at one another until two upperclassmen and a teacher came to break them apart. Both were dragged straight to the dean as rumors of the fight circulated the school like wildfire. 

“Everyone’s saying different things about what caused the fight?”

“Like?”

“A lot of stupid ones. But the two that seem the most possible are that he insulted your family.” Jisoo scoffed. “And the other is that a girl you both liked picked you instead of him.”

Now Jisoo let out a real laugh, his cheek stinging as the skin tingled around his bruises and cuts. “Now that’s rich. People in this school need to come up with better rumors.” Leaning forward, Jisoo rested his chin on his knee. He pursed his lips together as he thought back to the fight on everyone’s lips. 

“What are you doing?” Jisoo had asked when he was suddenly pinned against the wall. But just as his eyes flickered up to meet his lunch partner, he was punched right in the jaw. “Ow! What the hell?!”

The other flexed his bruised knuckles before staring back at Joshua with wide eyes. He wiped his lips of the hint of drool and immediately straightened out his uniform blazer. “Would you rather get caught fighting… or caught like this?”  

Jisoo pressed a finger to his lip, hissing a bit at the sting. Even hours later, it still felt fresh; he wondered how long it would last. He’s never been in a fight before this; it didn’t look good for the heir of the Hong corporation to be a delinquent, much less one who snuck off with boys. “I wonder if he meant any of the punches he threw at me or not…”

“What was that, Hyung?” Junhui asked. Jisoo shook his head, not meeting his gaze as he lowered his head. “...If you look on the bright side.” Junhui said, and Jisoo’s eyes flickered over. “You’ll get a few days off school.”

Jisoo barely managed a smile before resting his good cheek on his knee. The duo fell into silence until Mr. Hong came to the school to retrieve him twenty minutes later. 

“Get in, Jisoo.” He demanded without even fully walking down the hallway. 

Jisoo stood from the bench, glancing at Junhui one more time. “Yes, Sir…” he said softly.

“Jisoo.”

The heir looked up to see a large table full of his father’s associates, all of them curiously eyeing him. He shifted in his seat, scanning the room. A hand absentmindedly reached to his cheek, brushing along the smooth and currently untouched skin. When he turned to his father, the glare he was met with shot into his gut. 

“Yes?” He coughed. 

“What do you think?”

Jisoo blinked, glancing down at the paperwork that he’d been given before the meeting.  “I think….” he glanced at where Junhui was standing, behind him, with a reassuring smile on his face. “It’s about time for a drink.”

Those in attendance chuckled because it was their boss’s son who made the joke, not because it was funny. Jisoo knew that. When he looked at his father, the older man exhaled in frustration. “Let’s reconvene tomorrow,” he suggested, and without another word, the meeting came to an end. Jisoo stood up, fixing his suit as he watched many of his father’s associates nod and exit the room. His body felt like it was in a fish tank, floating aimlessly as waves crashed in his ears. But he still forced himself to bow his head at each of them as they left.

“Jisoo.” He heard clearly. “I expect you to actually have something useful to say when we meet again tomorrow.”

As Junhui approached to collect the meeting papers, Jisoo only nodded his head. “...Right…” he said. 

As he headed out the door and towards the parking garage, he pressed another hand to his cheek. Even now, he wondered if that boy in high school meant any of the punches he threw in his direction. But that was a question he’d kept to himself for the last 10 years, because he didn’t think anyone would understand if he asked. 

----------------

It was Mingyu’s day off, but that didn’t stop Joshua from driving straight there the second he had access to his car for the day. For an hour, his entire body was tense. Not even his driving playlist did anything to help him. He just needed to be elsewhere. When he got to the apartment door, he could already smell leftovers that Mingyu must be putting away. His stomach grumbled, a realization that he hadn’t eaten yet, but he didn’t care. He reached forward and began knocking on the door, only pulling back when he heard: “Coming, coming!” He exhaled, the muscles in his shoulders finally loosening. 

Mingyu was wearing a white T-shirt and was just barely tugging his apron off his neck. Joshua’s lip curled in a smile. “No, leave it on.” He teased. “I like it.”

Mingyu chuckled, cheeks dusting pink. “You didn’t tell me you were coming by, I would have made you a plate for dinner.”

“I forgot.” Joshua finally stepped in, sliding his shoes into their usual spot. When he turned, Mingyu’s lips had dropped a bit. “What?”

“You okay?” he asked softly. “You seem really stressed.”

Joshua walked deeper into the apartment, tilting his head to the side. “Maybe I am,” he said softly. He turned back to Mingyu. “Do you have any idea how to help someone de-stress?” 

Mingyu’s eyebrow arched as he turned and locked the door behind him. His eyes scanned Joshua over quickly, and he chuckled. “Tea and a good book.”

Joshua put his hands on his hips.”God, you’re a nerd.”

“And?” Mingyu walked closer, a hand slipping around his waist. Joshua inhaled his scent, looking up at him. Mingyu dipped down, their noses brushing together. “Seriously, what’s wrong? Is everything ok?”

The question was surprising, but Joshua nodded reassuringly. “Yeah,” he said softly. “I just… missed you, I guess.”

“Really?” Mingyu perked up, eyes sparkling like a puppy dog who just got a treat. Joshua could almost see his tail wag. It was cute, but Joshua felt his cheeks turn pink.

“Heh, don’t let it get to your head now.” he reached up, tangling a hand in the back of Mingyu’s hair. With one gentle tug, Mingyu leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, the fingers on Joshua’s waist digging into the fabric of his shirt. 

Soft kisses turned into heated ones, and gentle touches turned more desperate. Before Joshua knew it, his back was up against the wall, and his tank top was already tugged up and off. Mingyu’s apron was untied and dropped to the floor so Joshua could have access to his T-shirt, and his shorts were already unbuttoned. 

Joshua didn’t have to pull away from the kiss to tug Mingyu deeper into the apartment, smiling against the other's lips as he clumsily followed. He could feel his body vibrating in desperation to get Mingyu as close as possible, to de-stress and just sleep. 

Just as he was about to toss Mingyu’s shirt off, there was another knock at the door. Both of them stopped in the living room, their eyes locked on one another. By the second knock, they were looking towards the door. Joshua felt Mingyu’s hands grip his waist tightly, pulling him close to his chest. Protective instinct, it seemed, and Joshua would be a liar if he said his heart didn’t skip a bit at the gesture. 

“Who is it?” Mingyu finally called out. 

The doorknob jiggled, and through it came a sweet: “Oppa!”

Joshua’s eyes widened as he glanced at Mingyu, who immediately pulled from his hold and scrambled to the front entrance. He grabbed Joshua’s discarded tank top and his apron, tossing one in his direction. 

“Put this on!” He hushed, immediately fixing the wrinkles in his shirt. Joshua looked down at the tank top in his hands. In an instant he felt hands on his shoulders and looked up to see Mingyu again. “Put it on, Hyung.”

Joshua pouted a bit. “Why are you panicking?” he asked.

Mingyu stared at him with wide eyes. “I’d rather explain literally anything else to her than this.”

Mingyu turned back to the front entrance before Joshua could get a word in. As if he had anything of note to say, it felt as if the air had been punched right out of his lungs. Wordlessly, he tugged on his tank top just as the front door opened. He heard footsteps come through the door, and Mingyu smiled as a young woman came into view. She looked almost exactly like Mingyu, except her hair reached her back and she was much shorter. But she smiled in the same way and had the same dark eyes. 

“Hey, Minyeong.” Mingyu said quickly, his hand falling off Joshua’s arm as he headed over to hug her. “What are you doing here?”

“I heard you were sick!” She gasped, looking up at him as she dropped her bookbag to the floor. Mingyu pouted in disapproval of her excuse, so she didn’t keep it up for long. “Okay, okay. I finished all of my exams and wanted to surprise you with a visit.” She stepped back, arms outstretched on either side of her. “Surprise.”

Yeah, they’re definitely related.

Mingyu snorted as he reached for his sister’s bag, bringing it inside as she finished kicking off her shoes. She glanced up, her eyes immediately locking on Joshua. “Oh.” Her smile was soft, sweet, the same as Mingyu’s. “Hi. Sorry, I didn’t know my brother had a guest.” She bowed, and Joshua almost robotically followed her lead. “I’m Kim Minyeong.”

Joshua nodded his head. He glanced at Mingyu, who was chewing a hole into his bottom lip. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you…”

“Really?” Her eyes sparkled, hair bouncing behind her a bit. “How do you two know each other?” She looked at Mingyu, waiting to be properly introduced.

Mingyu’s smile was crooked as he motioned to Joshua. “He’s just a friend.” His voice wavered a bit, but he kept talking. “From work. His apartments are… well, fumigated, so I’ve been letting him crash here for the…  last few days.”

Sorry what? Joshua swallowed the question as soon as he saw Mingyu close his eyes, as if he were questioning what just came out of his own mouth! Joshua felt his chest burning as if an open flame had been started inside his rib cage. He looked down, blinking a few times. 

“Well, I hope our little apartment’s been comfortable for the time being.” Joshua looked up again, seeing Minyeong’s eyes sparkling in his direction.

With a deep breath, Joshua forced a smile, finally pushing off the place he’d felt glued to for the last five minutes. “Thank you.” he said. “But since your brother is an idiot-.” His eyes snapped to Mingyu, who ran a hand through his hair and looked away at the callout. “Let me introduce myself.” He took her hand and kissed the back of it. “I’m Jisoo. I’m appreciative of the hospitality.” 

“Ah, Jisoo.” Minyeong grinned. “He’s really handsome, Oppa.” She teased. “Are you single?”

Jisoo chuckled, letting his head hang. “Are you asking for yourself or him?”

“Whichever you’re interested in, Oppa.” She giggled. 

Jisoo’s lips were hurting, but he only kept his smile tighter and kinder. His eyes made sure to sparkle for as long as they needed to before his heart gave out. “Your sister’s funny, Mingyu.” He pulled his hand back, running a hand through his hair. “Well, you’ve traveled for a while, you must be tired. I’ll let you get settled in.”

Minyeong seemed to agree with the sentiment, stretching her arms over her head. “Yeah. I need to take a shower.” She looked at Mingyu, who scrambled to stand straight. 

“I can reheat some dinner for after.” He offered. Minyeong nodded, and with one final nod to Joshua, she headed towards the bathroom. Mingyu watched her disappear down the hall and into the bathroom, waiting for the door to close before he took a deep, pained breath. “Oh my God,” he sighed. “Hyung-.”

Joshua didn’t remember telling his body to start moving, but he felt himself start towards the front entrance. Mingyu’s footsteps were fast behind him. “Hyung, wait. Please.”

Joshua pushed his shoes on, his elbow supporting his weight against the wall. He could hear Mingyu trying to call to him, and a part of him wanted to hear him explain himself. But another part of him wanted to just crumple to the floor.

You want to be the one to explain this to her?! 

“Hyung, just wait a second, please.”

“I can’t. I need to make sure my apartment’s done being fucking fumigated. What a stupid fucking lie.” Without another word, he flew through the door, slamming it shut. The reverb from the forced echo reverberated through the hall, and back just to rip through his chest. For a moment, he stood there, hands at his sides as he waited to see what, if anything, would happen on the other side. 

It took two minutes of silence on the other end before Joshua finally started back towards the elevator. 

----------------

“Sir?” 

The third knock on his bedroom door made Joshua groan, tugging the sheets over his head. He’d been bundled up in bed since he got back home the night before, and he preferred it to stay that way. But Junhui was nothing if not good at his job.

“Sir, please. At least let me in.”

“Go away.” Joshua pleaded. He knew it would only be a matter of time before Junhui got one of the servants to unlock the door with the spare room key, so he fortified himself under as many blankets and pillows as he possibly could, hoping he’d be buried far enough away to not be detected.

He could hear the door open and the sound of footsteps approaching his bedside. 

“You have a meeting,” Junhui said softly.

“Nope.” 

Junhui didn’t put up a fight. “Are you sick?” He asked.

“...If that’s what you need to tell yourself.” 

“Sir…” Junhui begged. “What’s wrong?”

Joshua sighed, tugging the blankets tighter around himself. “Junhui, please…”

There was silence after that, but finally, footsteps shifted. “Okay…” Junhui said softly. “I’ll make a call to your father and say you’re not feeling well,” he said gently. “Just get some rest.” And without another word, Junhui left the room, and the door closed behind him. 

A minute of uninterrupted silence fell through the bedroom, and Joshua finally tossed the blanket off his head. Rolling on his back, Joshua stared up at the ceiling. Since returning home it felt as if he’d run ten miles with heavy weights on his ankles. HIs body wanted to move, but the thoughts didn’t seem to register in his nervous system. He laid motionless, wondering how much time had passed since Junhui had left the room. And within the silence and the inability to move, his eyes locked on the ceiling, Joshua was nothing more than a victim to his own thoughts.

He’s just a friend staying for a few days.

Logically, Mingyu didn’t need to say anything to anyone. Joshua wasn’t parading them around on a billboard every moment himself (well, he was. Just enough for his father to know he was doing it in the first place. Just not with who. Semantics). His own staff didn’t know who he was involved with! There was a reason. It had to be this way. They even talked about this… they knew there was a line they weren’t allowed to cross.

…But then why did it suck so much to hear Mingyu say that?! Why did it cling to him like one of those ankle weights that tugged his body lower and lower to the ground and slowed him down? 

From sugar daddy to just a friend… how was Joshua bouncing from every part of the ‘Mingyu’s relationship’ spectrum in such a short amount of time? He pursed his lips tightly in contemplation. 

Do you want to be the one to explain this to her?!

Mingyu’s panic at the mere idea of explaining ‘this’ to her flashed into his brain and he inhaled, closing his eyes to avoid it. It’s never been this hard to be involved with people before. He’s rarely been upset when affairs come to an end; one trip to the clubs and he’s right back on track. So why can’t he just do that here? Let it go as easily as he has in the past? Why is he cooped up in his room like a heartbroken teenager who isn’t even heartbroken!? They weren’t even dating!

Our relationship has progressed, hasn’t it? 

Other than the one time in the car, neither brought up the idea of being ‘boyfriends’. Maybe that was for the best, keeping a label off a jar with nothing inside to identify. They were… involved. Seriously. But not boyfriends. There’s a difference there, but it was so skewed by fog and tension in his mind that it felt almost non-existent. 

His head was spinning and he couldn’t slow it down on his own. Namjoo wouldn’t understand, Junhui wouldn’t understand, his father would simply ship him off to a far-off country for lord knows how long, and blacklist Mingyu from ever working a respectable job in the country again. 

Pulling his arms under his head, Joshua’s cheek puffed out onto the pillow, staring out the window as the world moved on around him. He didn’t know what to do; this had never happened to him before. There were just so many questions tangled together, and nobody around to help untangle them into something more understandable. 

When Joshua felt his eyes sting, he buried his head back into his pillow and hoped the world would simply melt away before he woke up so he no longer had to worry about these things. 

For a short time, the world fell quiet, and Joshua was finally able to feel the web of tangled thoughts fade away. 

The footsteps didn’t register in Joshua’s subconscious until they were just at his front door, but it was the jiggling of the knob that made his eyes open. They felt dry, and he immediately lifted his head off the pillow, eyes locking at two wet spots where his head once was. His hand came up to rub at his eyes just as the front door opened. 

“Mr. Hong?” He heard the voice of one of his father’s guards at his bedroom door. Slowly, he sat up, turning his head to see two of them standing with Junhui at their side. He looked apologetic, clearly wanting these two in the room just as much as Joshua did. Joshua glanced at the duo as one of them spoke. “Your father wants you in his office within the hour.” 

A deep inhale, and Joshua nodded. “...Will you at least get out so I can get dressed?” 

----------------

Mr. Hong was just finishing a phone call when Joshua was led into his office, not even acknowledging his son as he motioned to the open chair in front of him. Joshua rolled his eyes, running a hand through his hair and sinking down into the seat. He saw his father’s wife sitting at one of the couches, sipping some tea and reading a magazine. She didn’t even look up at him, not that he’d have anything to say to her anyway. 

The phone clicked off, and finally the father and son made eye contact. For a minute neither spoke, but it was Mr. Hong who ultimately led the conversation: “What was the problem that you had that was so difficult coming in today?”

“I’m sorry, Sir,” Joshua said flatly, hoping to simply yes his way out of his room and into his office as soon as possible. But his father could sense that, and with the way he was eyeing Joshua, he had plans to drag this conversation out.

“Your irresponsibility is not becoming of a future heir, you know.”

“Yes.”

“If everyone in the world stopped working because of one rough day or one problem, the global economy would crash.”

Joshua glanced down at his fingers, picking at one of the nail beds. “Yes, Sir.”

“Hm… you’re awfully obedient today.” He said. Joshua finally flicked his eyes back up, watching as Mr. Hong eyed him. He still felt the effects of just waking up, being practically thrown into any clothes he could, and rushed out the door to be here on time. It was jet lag for a 20-minute drive through Seoul. Joshua could barely keep his eyes trained on his father. His head felt heavy, and he wanted to sleep. “Are you getting sick?”

“No, Sir.” he said simply.

“Mm… Because I know Mingyu was sick for a short period. I’d hope you didn’t catch what he had.” Joshua swallowed, biting back his bottom lip as he shook his head.

“No.” He said again, flatter this time. “He’s been feeling better.”

“Then he just took today off… for no reason?”

For a brief moment, Joshua allowed himself to sit in a world where he could tell his father about the storm in his mind. About how uncertain he was in these new feelings and not knowing how to navigate them despite all of his life experience. He allowed himself to imagine a world where his father would listen and give him advice on how to fix this situation he’d found himself in with Mingyu.

But it was because of his father that he was put in this predicament in the first place. The moment was brief indeed, and Joshua was swiftly dropped back to reality, the force of the drop making his entire body feel even heavier. 

Joshua eyed his father a bit harder than before at the odd topic change. “...I don’t know. He is supposed to know my whereabouts, not the other way around.” 

Mr. Hong scoffed, rolling his eyes. “I see you’re finally waking up and starting on your shenanigans.”  He pushed a folder across the table, and Joshua followed his movements. “There’s a meeting during lunch I want you to attend in my place.” He said simply. “You have until then to get yourself out of whatever funk you find yourself in and make yourself presentable.” Joshua took the folder quietly, simply passing it over to Junhui without so much as a glance at the description on the flap. 

“Can I go now?” 

Mr. Hong simply nodded, turning back to the phone and bringing it to his ear once more. Joshua got up, nodding his head and fixing his suit jacket. He and Junhui started towards the door, managing one glance at Mrs. Hong just as she flipped the page in her magazine. 

As Joshua stepped into the hallway, he pressed his hand against the wall, steadying himself. He could feel Junhui at his side, almost ready to support him with his own body weight.

“Let’s get you to your office. Chan, can you take him, so I can get him something to drink?” 

Joshua wordlessly tugged his arm back, starting towards his office with Chan close by. For the first time in a long time, he really didn’t have much to say. 

----------------

The first day Mingyu came back to work was awkward. Joshua watched him open the door of the car that morning, and he only offered a soft ‘Good morning’, before slipping into the back seat. Junhui drove him to work that day, walked him to his office, and stayed until a few missed phone calls pulled him away. Then the pair were alone for the first time in almost two days. It felt foreign yet missed in some fucked up way. 

Joshua silently typed away on his computer, refusing to look anywhere else in the room. Mingyu was perched inside, advised by Junhui due to Joshua’s odd behavior. If only he knew. 

Mingyu seemed uncomfortable, like he wanted to say something but didn’t know what. Or how. And honestly, Joshua didn’t know if he wanted ot hear anything. He’d had two days of sulking over the entire thing, lounging in his room or in his office watching the clock tick incredibly slow, or as the sun moved at a snail's pace across the sky. Even when Namjoo came by to investigate his random text, he refused, wanting to just camp out in his bed. He couldn’t bring himself to tell her what was going on. It all suddenly felt too real, and he couldn’t bring himself to have both of them hurting. 

“Hyu-.” Joshua blinked for what felt like the first time in years, groaning as his head fell forward. As he rubbed his temples, MIngyu coughed. “Sir.” 

“What?” he groaned against his better judgment. For a minute, Mingyu said nothing, and Joshua just hoped he would decide to drop it after all. But eventually, he spoke. 

“I’m sorry.”

Joshua finally turned to him and took his expression, his stature in, for the first time since he slammed the door in his face. His eyes were heavy and baggy, caked in foundation and concealer to hide them. His arms were tight behind his back, most likely on edge still. His hair was just barely done, as if he ran one brush through it and called it a day. He looked awful. Good. It was the first thought that ran through his head, but he simply inhaled.

“You look like you haven’t slept,” he said simply. 

“Not well. The couch is only comfortable for so long.”

Joshua looked up at him again.  “It’s fine…” he finally said. He spun the chair towards the window, mostly because looking at Mingyu was starting to fill him with anxiety. 

“Hyung.” Mingyu’s voice was right behind him. “She’ll be in town for the next three days before she goes back to school.”

Joshua frowned, spinning his chair around. He kicked one leg up and rested his elbow on the desk, eyes narrowing up at him. “Is that your way of saying I need to stay away for the next three days?” he asked. “Fine. I don’t want to look at you anyway.”

If Mingyu was hurt by the comment, he didn’t show it. Instead, a nervous smile graced his lips. “No, I want you to meet her properly.”

Joshua blinked, his hand falling at his side. A moment of unsure silence passed between them, and Joshua only huffed. “Please,” he huffed. “I don’t know why I expected you to say anything to her at all. It’s not like I’ve told anyone if they don’t need to know.” When he tried to turn his chair, it stopped halfway, forcing his eyes to fall back on his computer screen. They flickered up to Mingyu, then down to his hand gripping the armrest. In one swift movement, he spun Joshua back around to look at him and leaned down until the duo were at eye level. 

“I want to introduce her to you.” He said simply. He licked his lips, swallowing some nerves down to continue. “She didn’t seem to recognize you as my boss.” He said. “So, if it’s okay with you, I can just introduce you as… someone I’m involved with. Because I want to. She and I were talking the other day, and she knows I’m seeing someone, just… not who. So…” Eventually, he trailed off, his neck and cheeks a deep red in embarrassment as he hung down head low. 

Joshua’s mouth opened a bit, staring wide-eyed at Mingyu. 

“You don’t have to do that…” He sighed, and his ribcage shook with the force. “You can't fill yourself with false hope about this whole thing. Your friends and Seungcheol know because they figured it out. Namjoo only knows because she’s the only reason I’m allowed to do this…” He raked a hand through his hair. “You said so yourself nobody can know, and you’re right.” His fingers curled into his palm and he huffed. “Besides. I don’t have anyone…. To introduce you to. So…”

Mingyu sighed, smiling softly. “I know,” he said. 

Joshua groaned, clenching his eyes tightly as he leaned back in his seat. “Fuck, why is this so hard?! It’s never been this hard!” His hands rubbed over his face as he lamented in frustration. 

Mingyu was silent for a minute. “I think that’s a compliment.” The comment confused Joshua, and he poked his eyes out from behind his hands, pouting a bit as Mingyu grinned. “It’s harder with me… so you must really like me or something.” 

Joshua scoffed, eyes widening and a corner of his lips hiking up in surprise as his mouth fell open. “Hah. The other day really did get to your head, didn’t it?!” 

“What? You said it!” Mingyu’s eyes brightened a bit. Joshua huffed, finally yanking his chair away and spinning back and turning his attention from Mingyu and his confidently dorky grin. “Fine, I can introduce you to her as my boss,” he said. Joshua’s stubborn little ‘hmph’ made Mingyu laugh a bit. “Either way, I want her to know you’re someone important to me. Not just some guy sleeping on my couch while your house gets fumigated.”

“That was an awful lie,” Joshua said, head immediately flipping around. “To even suggest I’d live in an apartment is wild enough.”

“Okay, not going to talk about the blatant hypocrisy over that statement, seeing as you’re always over my apartment, but I panicked!”

“You’re an idiot when you panic.” 

Mingyu snorted, unable to really deny the fact. Joshua huffed, turning his attention instead towards his desk. In a few seconds, he had his phone pressed to his ear, glancing once more at Mingyu. “Yes, Junhui? What’s my evening looking like?” He grabbed a pen and a piece of paper, tugging both of them closer to him. “Okay, perfect. I need you to do me a favor.” He sighed. “I need you to make a reservation for three people at that really good Japanese sushi spot uptown. Mhm… yes. And I need someone to go back to my house and get my nicest suit dry cleaned and bring it straight here. Before the day is over. Try for an eight o’clock reservation, alright? Okay, perfect. Yeah. Bye.” 

Mingyu’s eyes were wide when Joshua looked over. “What?” he asked. 

“You didn’t have to do that. I was just going to make dinner at my place.”

“Well…” he shifted. “It’s an important meeting, meeting my bodyguard’s family. She should be treated to a good meal.” Mingyu gasped, and Joshua’s lip poked up into a smile. “You know what I mean.” 

“You’re adorable.” Mingyu teased, chuckling a bit. 

Joshua turned to him, eyes sparkling in amusement. “I know.” he said simply. “Now, would calling a car for her be too much?”

“Uh…” Mingyu chucked. “I dunno, she might like that.” Joshua reached for the phone again, scribbling notes onto the same pad of paper. 

“Noted.” 

-------------

Mingyu watched fondly as Joshua fiddled with the blazer of his suit. Then, he ran a hand through his hair a few times, making sure any loose pieces were tucked away. Then he looked in his phone’s camera, angling it towards every spot on his face. “Hyung,” Mingyu called, finally catching his attention. “What are you doing?”

“I’m making sure I look alright.”

“You look just fine.” He assured. “Besides, she already knows what you look like.” 

Joshua pouted up at him. “Yeah, well-.” 

Before either could continue bickering, the wood divider slid open, and Mingyu immediately stood up to greet his sister. Her brows were furrowed until she laid eyes on the room. “Wow.” She said. “This is so fancy.” The hostess took her bag gently, bringing it to the coat rack in the other room. She turned back to her brother, then to Joshua as he stood up from his seat. She blinked. “Ah. Jisoo-Oppa!” She nodded her head, immediately looking around again. “Nice to see you again.”

Jisoo walked over, eyes flickering to Mingyu. He reached out, taking her hand and nodding politely. “We didn’t get to meet properly last time.” He reached out, taking her hand. “I’m Hong Jisoo. Mingyu’s boss.” He nodded his head. “Nice to meet you.”

Minyeong glanced at her brother, who nodded his head. She smiled sweetly. “I know,” she said.

Silence.

“Eh… what?” Joshua asked curiously, leaning forward to make sure he heard her right. She laughed.

“I thought you looked familiar when we last met. But Mingyu seemed insistent that you were just a work friend. I did some research, and it wasn’t hard to find your face on your family’s social media.”

Joshua huffed out a laugh. “I suppose that’s true,” he said. Minyeong nodded again, a bit deeper this time.

“Thank you for taking such good care of my brother.” She said. Joshua’s eyes flickered to Mingyu, who was beaming like a proud parent. He exhaled, nodding his head.

“Why don’t we go eat, hm?” Joshua gently put his hand on her back, guiding her towards the table and pulling out her chair. He settled across from the sibling duo, catching Mingyu’s amused glance as he settled into his seat. “Okay, Minyeong. I want to know everything you can tell me about Mingyu.” He said simply, leaning forward a bit in his seat. 

—-------------------

The dinner lasted well into the night, the trio talking and drinking over good food. Joshua couldn’t remember the last time dinner conversation tasted even better than the food put in front of him. Minyeong shared many insightful stories about their childhood, providing Joshua with a clear picture of Mingyu as a young child. It was adorable. 

By the time the trio left the restaurant, Minyeong, marveling at Joshua’s black card, similarly to how her brother once did, it was late. The nighttime chills had picked up, and Mingyu was quick to toss his suit jacket over his sister’s shoulders before hurrying to get the car. 

Joshua checked his watch, glancing up at Minyeong as she waited patiently beside him. “I hope dinner was nice,” he said. “Your brother has told me you guys don’t get to go to a lot of expensive places.”

“Oh, it was delicious.” Minyeong smiled. “I appreciate it, thank you.” Joshua smiled a bit, watching as Minyeong took the reins to lead the conversation. “He really loves his job.”

“Does he?” Joshua arched an eyebrow. 

“Yeah. He always tells me how much easier it is to pay the bills now. And how much he enjoys Mr. Lee’s company.” She hummed, tilting her head in thought. “He told me Mr. Wen has also been very helpful in helping him adjust to what he needs to do.” She pressed her hands together, nodding. 

Joshua’s eyes widened just a bit. “...That’s all?” he asked. Minyeong cocked her head, now being the one to raise her eyebrow. “Ah, nothing.” He shook his head, finally turning his gaze away. He felt a pout jutting through his bottom lip, but he swallowed it back. He knew he had to rein in his thoughts. He was Mingyu’s boss tonight, nothing more.”

“He talks about you, too.”

Joshua turned his head almost immediately back to Minyeong, who was already biting back a very amused grin. Joshua blinked, clicking his tongue. “Oh does he?” he asked in his best attempt to be nonchalant. 

“He does.” She said, A pause, then Minyeong continued. “He says how much he enjoys working for you.” 

“Ah…” Joshua nodded, his shoulders slumping a bit. “Right, of course. I’m glad he does…”

“I mean, I wasn’t surprised. What other boss in Korea goes an hour out of his way to his bodyguard’s house just to hang out and eat dinner? That’s so… selfless.” 

Joshua’s eyes fell to her, and she met his gaze with a confident smile. His eyes narrowed, staring through every layer of her expression as if he were peeling back an onion, trying to get to the truth behind her words. 

“...How’d you find out?” he asked.

“You had a hickey on your shoulder,” she said simply, pointing to the spot on her own body, just at the dip of the shoulder and neck. “And my brother’s shorts were still unbuttoned.”

Joshua laughed. “Jesus.” 

“Yeah, not as subtle as you were trying to be.” She shrugged. “But I assumed you had your reasons not to say anything, and I was clearly right,” she glanced at him. Joshua nodded, his hands slipping into his pockets. 

“You’re smart.” He said.

Minyeong let out a pleased hum, pressing her hands together. “I picked up a lot of things from watching my brother. He’s sacrificed a lot for me.” She said simply, waiting to catch Joshua’s attention before she continued. “He basically raised me while our dad worked. He made sure I was taken care of. Especially after our father died.” She smiled softly. “I want to see him happy.”

Joshua nodded his head. “I’m sure you do.” He said simply. “Do you not think I’ll do that?”

“Aren’t you engaged?” she asked immediately. Joshua licked his lips, eyes casting down to the floor. “I’m not saying you wouldn’t want to, but… it’ll be hard. Harder than it is for others.” She inhaled. “I don’t want my brother to get hurt. He gave up everything to send me to school and make sure there’s a house and food to come back to.” She turned to face him. 

“I…” Joshua trailed off. “I know that better than anyone. Trust me…”

Minyeong nodded her head in understanding. “I don’t plan to tell anyone, because my brother wouldn’t want me to. But tell me something….” Joshua turned to face her. “You promise you really care about him, right? You promise you’re involved with him for the right reasons?”

Joshua blinked, eyes lingering on the way her face tightened a bit in determination, seemingly bracing herself for the answer she would get. He toggled with the thoughts in his head for a few seconds. From eight months ago to now, Joshua could feel the answer he’d of given would be different in tone if similar in words. 

Joshua let out a soft exhale. “I’d like to say so...” He confessed. 

Minyeong was quiet as she took in the answer. Then, she nodded her head. “Okay, then,” she said simply. Like flipping a switch, she turned to him. “Did this start through work, then?”

“Ah, no.” Joshua chuckled. “We met at Waterbomb. And then realized the next day…”

“That was you?!” Her eyes widened, and Joshua stifled a laugh, slightly embarrassed. “He called me when he got home and wouldn’t stop talking about you!” 

That took Joshua by surprise, his cheeks slightly flushed. “Hah.” he tilted his head. “I figured as much.” he managed to said, biting the inside of his lip. “That’s why I’m so pissed he simply introduced me as a couch surfer!” 

Now Minyeong laughed, and it was bright and loud like Mingyu’s in a way. 

“I’ll make sure to scold him for it,” she assured. 

Joshua huffed. “Please, do,” he said simply, turning to the sound of a car pulling up in front of them. Just as Mingyu stepped out of the driver’s seat, Minyeong was already rounding the car. 

“I called it! I totally called it!” She said. Mingyu’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Call wha- oh my god!” He covered his face, ears tingling pink as his little sister continued to berate him. Joshua crossed his arms over his chest, watching in amusement as the two siblings bickered in the parking lot. 

They were definitely related.

----------------

Joshua had managed one more visit with Minyeong before she headed back to school, sitting around Mingyu’s table and chatting. Now that she knew, she felt way more comfortable sharing every embarrassing story from Mingyu’s childhood she could think of, leaving her brother a mess of embarrassment on the couch. There was nothing he could do the entire evening but just endure it.

The day Minyeong was getting dropped off at the bus stop, Joshua was perched at his desk, scrolling through his phone. His evenings without Mingyu around felt much emptier now, an unfamiliarity in his routine. It was so normal to be with him, even long after their shifts ended. But he gave Mingyu some grace. This time. 

Just as Joshua was debating simply turning in for the night, his phone began buzzing in his hand. Jeonghan appeared in bright text at the top of the screen, with a photo of both him and his friend snapping a selfie the last time they’d gotten drinks at a club in Itaewon. Joshua hummed, clicking the answer button with ease and putting the phone to his ear.

“No, Jeonghan, I’m not interested in coming over tonight,” he teased, smiling a bit in amusement. As he listened to Jeonghan chat, though, his smile dropped slightly. “Wait, seriously?” He perked up a bit. Immediately, he yanked his laptop from the corner of his desk, turning it on and pulling up his documents. “Email it to me.” He pursed his lips. “What? Jeonghan-.” He groaned. “Fine. Where do you want to meet? I can come now, and-.” he frowned. “You always make things so difficult. Okay, just say where and I’ll be there.” 

Jeonghan hung up, and Joshua pulled up his work calendar. He knew scheduling a last-minute trip would be challenging, especially if he had meetings or other boring paperwork. When Jeonghan texted him his upcoming shoot schedule, he scanned it over. 

“Jeju, hm? I can make that work…” He turned back to his computer, immediately clicking on the tab labeled ‘Kim Mingyu Schedule’.

“Here you go, Sir.”

Jisoo watched as a worker kneeled in front of his bedside, a cup of water and a teaspoon in her hand. “Drink this. It will make you feel better.”

The eight-year-old’s nose scrunched. “I don't like it.”

She smiled, soft and sweet. “Well, you need to take it to feel better.” She passed the cup over. “I give this to my son when he’s sick, and it works wonders. Even if it doesn't taste the best.”

Jisoo pouted, taking the little medicine cup and looking up at his sitter with a last-ditch pleading pout. “Oh, come now. Your parents expect you better in time for their return from the States. You need to drink it. Don't disappoint them.”

And Jisoo did. 

Joshua leaned back in his chair, his eyes burning as he stared dead into the blue-lit computer screen. He was scrolling through walls of text so familiar he could see them when he closed his eyelids. 

“I don't know what to do anymore…” he said softly. 

“We've exhausted all the information we could.” Jeonghan's voice sounded far on the other end of the phone. There was sounds of clanking and footsteps as he came back to the phone. “I'm sorry Joshuji.”

“It's not your fault.” Joshua assured, brow twitching at the nickname. “We can't find what we don't know.” He shook his head. “You'd think my father is some kind of magician with how easily this entire marriage has disappeared from public knowledge.”

“When you have power, I guess.” Jeonghan chuckled, but Joshua stayed silent. He heard Jeonghan chewing something on the other side, snacking while Joshua's entire body felt heavy. He sniffled, sneezing into his hand. “You getting sick?”

“I hope not.” Joshua scoffed. He thought back to his day with Mingyu, standing at Mr. Kim's grave in the pouring rain, trying to find the right words, any words, to say. “I am not in the mood too-.”

Achoo!

“Fuck.” Joshua groaned. Jeonghan laughed on the other end, mocking his friend's poor health. 

“Citrus tea, my friend.” He suggested. “And there are these cold patches my mother swears by. I'll send you the link.”

His lips tightened. “My hero…” Joshua huffed, grabbing a tissue off his nightstand. Just as he blew his nose, there was a knock at his door. Then two. Joshua turned his head towards the door as his name was called. “I’ll call you back Jeonghan.”

“Alright.” He said before the line went dead. Pushing his chair back, Joshua crossed the expanse of his bedroom. His arms stretched over his head. “Alright, let’s get today over with.” He murmured to himself. When he unlocked his bedroom door and opened it, he saw Junhui standing there. He held a case of coffee in his hand. 

“Morning,” he said, passing one of the cups through the door. Joshua took it appreciatively, taking a long sip.

“Morning,” he said. His eyes fell over Junhui’s head, expecting to see a big, goofy grin standing behind him. But when his eyes dipped lower, he wasn’t met with Mingyu, but instead Chan. 

“Good morning,” Chan said, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Joshua didn’t mean for his smile to fall as obviously as he did, but he simply looked at Junhui.

“Where’s Mingyu?” he asked quickly. He could almost hear Chan deflate behind them.

“You aren’t happy to see me?” He mumbled behind a pout. Junhui shrugged.

“He took a last-minute sick day…” Junhui explained. Joshua’s eyes widened a bit as Junhui continued. “But Chan will be-.”

Junhui’s gasp in surprise was cut off when Joshua slammed the door in his face, immediately heading back to his desk and grabbing his cell phone. He could hear Junhui on the other side. “Sir? Sir?! Hyung, what happened?!” He knocked frantically on the door. “Damn it, you were doing so well with getting ready for work, we can’t start back from square one!” 

Joshua didn’t answer, simply dialing Mingyu’s number and pressing it to his ear. It rang for a few seconds, though they felt like hours with the way Joshua was tapping his foot on the floor. Finally, a click came through on the other line. “Mingyu, what the he-.” 

His frustrated string of curses got cut off immediately by the sound of a sharp, deep, and long cough. Joshua had to pull the phone from his ear, staring down at it with wide eyes. When the noise subsided, he heard Mingyu speak. “Ah, shit. Morning, Sir.” Mingyu grumbled. His voice was soft, scratchy, it sounded painful. Joshua almost forgot that he’d been the one to call until Mingyu coughed again. 

“You sound awful.” He said.

“Oh, yeah, thanks for that. Didn’t know.” Mingyu grumbled, forcing an amused chuckle. “Sorry, it was so last-minute.”

Joshua turned towards his bedroom door again as it flew open. Junhui and Chan were standing there, but Joshua immediately put his hand up. He turned and made his way into the bathroom, closing that door and making sure to lock it.

“There are too many damn doors in this house,” he heard Junhui grumble, followed by an amused laugh from Chan. Joshua pressed his phone closer to his ear. 

“When did you get so sick? You were fine just the other day…”

“I think it was from the rain,” Mingyu admitted. “I started getting sniffly and last night woke up with a fever.” Mingyu groaned, coughing again. 

Joshua’s eyes widened, a vision of Mingyu sprinting through the pouring rain without a jacket because it was draped over Joshua’s shoulders. Joshua had gotten wet that day, but Mingyu was soaked to the bone. No wonder he got sick so quickly. “...And you didn’t think to tell me?!” He found himself shouting, his heart clenching in his chest.

“I thought I’d be ok this morning, I literally just called out like… maybe an hour ago?”

Joshua groaned, running a hand through his hair. He checked his watch, chewing on the inside of his lip. “Okay well… fine then… But don’t die, alright?”

Mingyu finally managed a laugh, but it was strained. “Didn’t plan too, but okay.” Joshua sighed, allowing the line to go dead. He dropped his arm to his side, fingers tightening around the phone. Joshua took a deep breath, turning to face himself in the mirror. He tugged at the growing bangs in front of his face. 

“Sir, please open the door.” He heard Junhui plead through the bathroom door. In an instant, the bathroom door swung open, making both Junhui and Chan jump in surprise. “Jesus!”

“I need to go out,” he demanded, pushing past them. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?” Junhui asked curiously. Joshua turned his head as he approached his closet, flinging the doors open. 

“I need to go to a pharmacy,” he said. 

“...Are you getting sick?” Junhui asked, doing a full body scan and mental wellness check. 

“No.” Joshua tugged out a pair of jeans and a button-up shirt. He spared no time, tugging off his sleep shirt and tossing it on his bed. He could sense Junhui and Chan’s confusion from behind him, shrugging on and buttoning up his shirt in the process. “Well. Not really.” 

“But you have to be at work.” Joshua sighed, pointing to his laptop.

“I’ll work remotely,” he said. Tugging at the last button of his slacks, Joshua brushed his hair back in the mirror. He did a quick scan of himself, and when he deemed he was ready to go, he turned back to his workers. “Now let’s go.” 

---------------

Joshua had Junhui stop about 5 blocks from Mingyu’s house. He still couldn’t have either Junhui or Chan asking any questions, and as of now, they hadn’t. All they need to know is he knows someone in this area. As the car pulled up, Joshua stepped out onto the sidewalk. He looked around, turning in the direction of Mingyu’s apartment. It was busy today, people shuffling every which way to get where they needed to go. 

“Sir?” Junhui called, making Joshua turn his head. “Where is there a pharmacy?”

“Tsk…” Joshua pursed his lips. “It’s that way.” He pointed randomly.

“Alright…” Junhui arched an eyebrow. After a moment, the door opened again. “Chan, go with him.”

“You don’t trust me, Junhui?” Joshua asked, turning to look at his assistant through the car window. Junuhui blinked.

“About as far as I can throw you. And I mean that with all due respect.” He said bluntly. Joshua scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“Fine.” He started walking. He could hear Chan’s footsteps behind him, and he sighed. This really wasn’t going to be easy, hm? Joshua walked with his computer bag over his shoulder, turning to Chan. “I’m going to be over here all day.” He said. Chan tilted his head. “After I go to this pharmacy and visit my friend, I'll find a cafe and work.” 

Chan only smiled. “Not a problem. I’ll be here~.”

Chan stop being good at your job. Joshua thought behind a forced smile. The pair were heading into the area’s local markets, vendors and stalls open on every corner and strip of the long pathway. People weaved through with ease, branching off to other less crowded streets when they were done. Joshua tugged at his jacket, his gaze sharpening. “Here’s a shortcut,” he said. He felt Chan get a few steps closer to him, looking around at the strangers they were about to mingle in with.

Chan really was good at his job. Poor guy.

Joshua clenched his fingers at his side, sliding them into his pocket as he looked through the crowds. He listened to the different sounds of vendors calling out, smelled different foods being cooked, watched people barter for vegetables and goods. Joshua made a mental note to come here with Mingyu when he felt better.

“Chan, do you see a pharmacy nearby?” Joshua asked, turning to his guard. The younger shook his head, immediately digging for and pulling out his phone. 

“Let me check,” he said simply. Scrolling through his phone, Chan pursed his lips together. “...It looks like there’s one right…” When Chan lifted his head to show Joshua, he blinked. He wasn’t beside him. Or in front of him, or behind him. In fact…. He wasn’t in Chan’s line of sight at all. “S-sir?” Chan’s voice wavered, blinking rapidly as if he’d reappear like a twisted magic trick. Nothing. “...Sir!?” He called louder. He got on his tiptoes, looking over as many strangers’ heads as he could so he could find his boss’s black tuft of hair. “Oh no… uh…” Chan shuffled past a few more people, before his pace stopped once again. “Sir, what ….” He huffed, hanging his head. “This isn’t good. Okay, uh… I can’t call Junhui-hyung….”

“You look stressed. Hungry?” Chan looked over as the vendor at his side called out to him, shoving a piece of takoyaki in his direction. Chan eyed the middle-aged man with a rag around his forehead and a pair of overalls on, watching as he simply stood there with the snack in one hand and his other outstretched. 

“No.” Chan shook his head, doing one more frantic swipe of the crowd. “Actually-.” Chan took the takoyaki before beginning to speak. “Have you seen a really rich guy, about this tall, handsome-.”

---------------

With one more turn over his shoulder, Joshua could finally stop to catch his breath. “Damn,” he gasped, head falling forward. He pressed his hand against the nearest wall. He could only imagine Chan’s face right now, wondering where he was in such an unfamiliar and crowded place. Sorry, Chan. He thought to himself, before finally pushing on ahead and entering the apartment building at the end of the corner. He crossed the main threshold and entered the elevator, watching as the doors closed and he headed up. It had already been the better part of an hour and a half before Joshua had headed over here; he wondered how Mingyu was during that time. Did he fall back asleep, is he feeling a bit better? Has he taken medicine? A weird sense of uncertainty filled Joshua’s stomach. 

“What the hell am I even supposed to do for someone who's sick?” he murmured to himself. Before he could ponder the question long enough, the elevator stopped and the door opened, allowing Joshua to head down the familiar hall towards the last door. He turned, and with a deep breath, knocked. 

For a second, nothing happened. So, he knocked again. Mingyu must really be sick, most likely staggering through the halls in a fog. He bit the inside of his lip at the mental image that thought provided him. Just as he went to knock for a third time, this time with a shout across the door, there was a high-pitched: “Coming!”

It was definitely a guy. But it certainly wasn’t Mingyu.

Joshua’s entire body went rigid, eyes locked on the front door as it clicked and swung open. Before Joshua was a tall man, a handsome man. It took one swipe of the shaggy brown hair, and the long, sharp features that morphed as the pair stared at one another for him to realize it was one of Mingyu’s friends from Waterbomb. He couldn’t for the life of him remember his name, though. He was preoccupied that night. 

“Oh, uh…” The male tilted his head. “Can I help you?”

He doesn’t remember me?! Joshua had to physically mold away his glare. He licked his bottom lip before he spoke. “Hi, I’m here to see Mingyu. I heard he was sick.” Seokmin arched an eyebrow as Joshua sighed, tugging at his jacket and motioning to his company name tag. “I’m-.”

“Ah!” Seokmin’s eyes widened. “Hong Jisoo!” Joshua closed his eyes for a moment, making sure to take an extra deep breath. “I knew you looked familiar! Come in!” 

Joshua kicked his shoes off, instinctively going to kick them to the same spot he always did, beside Mingyu’s. When he saw his spot was already overtaken by Seokmin, he simply set them one spot over. “I didn’t know his boss was going to come by.”

“It was last-minute,” Joshua admitted, shrugging his jacket off. Seokmin immediately reached for it, and Joshua couldn’t help but allow him, muttering a thank you as it was hung in the hall closet. “Is he alright?”

“He’s asleep, last I checked. I’ve only been here about 30 minutes myself. When Mingyu called me-.”

“He called you?” Joshua’s tooth sank into his bottom lip as Seokmin’s eyebrows raised over his head at the sudden question. But Joshua, ever the professional, simply coughed and redirected. “You two must be close.”

Seokmin smiled, fond. “We’ve been friends since college. I’d like to think we’re pretty close.” Seokmin stepped aside then. “He’s in the bedroom. It’s right down the-.”

“I know.” Seokmin blinked. Joshua, again, had to redirect. “It’s… I had a feeling.” And without another word to dig himself deeper in a hole, he headed down the hall and into the bedroom without knocking.

The room looked the same as it did the last time the pair were together, a bit messy but overall untouched. As Joshua peered further in, his eyes falling to the bed, he felt his heart constrict. Mingyu was lying down, the sheets tossed all over from movement in his sleep, and a rag over his forehead. His limbs were sprawled every which way, and he was snoring, some of the deepest, most body-shaking snores he’d ever heard from Mingyu when he was in a dead sleep. 

Slowly, Joshua padded through the room, reaching the side of his bed. He turned towards the door, thankful that Seokmin had not attempted to follow him in. Mingyu groaned, catching Joshua’s attention again. He immediately reached forward, adjusting the rag on his head and pressing the back of his hand against Mingyu’s cheek. “Mm…”

“You’re burning up,” Joshua mumbled. Mingyu’s eyes finally cracked open.

“Hyung?” He groaned. Joshua pulled back, watching Mingyu attempt to sit up. The rag flopped into his lap, but he paid it no mind, eyes locked on Joshua. His face was flushed red, eyes bloodshot and puffy from all of the sniffling and the raging fever. Joshua gulped. “What are you doing here? You should be at work.”

Joshua had to offer a small smile. “I can work remotely today,” he said softly. “I wanted to check on you.” He motioned to Mingyu’s body. “And it’s a good thing I did, you look awful.” He grabbed the comforter and draped it over Mingyu’s body fully.

“I’ll… text Chan, you should go home. I don’t want to make you sick.” 

Joshua’s hands stopped the comforter right at Mingyu’s chest, glancing at him. “Don’t worry about Chan, Junhui, or work. I decided to come, I’ll deal with the consequences.” he finished pulling the sheets up. “Now lie back down. Did you take medicine?”

“No,” Mingyu said, coughing into his hand. “Haven’t gotten up.”

Joshua sighed. “Okay, then… I’ll uh…” he looked back towards the door, hearing shuffling and rummaging in the other room. “Get you medicine. Lie down and rest until I’m back.”

Too tired to argue, Mingyu simply lay back and closed his eyes. Joshua took the rag in his hands, feeling it was starting to dry up and get warm. As Mingyu’s breaths evened out, Joshua quietly left the room. 

Seokmin was wrist deep in soapy water in the kitchen, the faucet running and glass clanking together under the suds. He didn’t notice Joshua walk back in until he was at the archway of the door. Seokmin moved so easily in Mingyu’s space, almost as easily as Joshua did. It made something boil in his gut, something that hurt to swallow. 

“I hope he’s not causing you any problems.” Seokmin chuckled.

“Ah, no. If anything, it’s probably the other way around.” Joshua admitted, his lips finally quirking into a small smile. Seokmin’s eyebrows raised a bit, nodding as he turned to the dishes again, picking up a plate. After a second, he motioned to the collection of damp dishes and cups he’d made beside him.

“You can dry the dishes.” He said simply. Joshua blinked, eyebrows furrowing. When Seokmin smiled, all his teeth showed. “You keep eyeing the dish rack. My boyfriend does that when he wants to help but doesn’t want to ask.” 

Caught, Joshua slowly approached the sink. He took one of the dish rags hanging off the counter, lifted up a dish, and got to work.

For a minute, they were silent, only the sound of clinking utensils between them. Joshua dried each one down, occasionally looking towards Seokmin. “You said you and Mingyu have known each other since college?” Joshua asked, not realizing how low his voice came out until Seokmin looked over and slightly widened his eyes. Shit. 

“Oh yeah.” Seokmin nodded his head. “We were in the same business classes. He’s really smart.”

Joshua nodded, eyes falling to the dish as it was set into a pile to dry. “He is.”

“We ended up making a little study group for that first semester. He basically ran it like a mini class; everyone who went was amazed at just how good he was with math and stuff.” Seokmin passed Joshua another plate. “Even when he had to take a break from school he made sure to help me with my homework.”

Joshua glanced over. “You said he took a break?” Seokmin nodded. “But he never went back. Is he still on a break?”

Seokmin hummed, pursing his lips together. “I guess that’s how he’d say it.” he said. “But when his father passed away, and he tried to get back into school, all of his scholarships hadn’t been renewed and weren’t valid anymore.” Seokmin sighed. “And with the money he had, couldn’t afford to go back to school or apply for the scholarships again. So, he put a pause on it.” He motioned to Joshua with his chin. “And that’s how he ended up with you guys.” 

“I see.” Joshua hummed softly, looking back down at the dish he set aside when it was dry. “I didn’t know that… not all of it.”

“Mingyu can be so selective with information sometimes. I think he’s embarrassed about it.” 

What, you going to tell me you’re embarrassed about being a college dropout?! Please, spare me!

Joshua felt as if his body was physically shoved back, swallowing something thick down his throat at his own memory coming back to haunt him. He didn’t have long to linger on it, though, because Seokmin spoke again. “Thinking about it, I really shouldn’t have opened my mouth. I’m sorry.”

“No, I…” Joshua hummed. “I’m glad you told me, I won’t say anything.” Seokmin chuckled. As Joshua set down the last of the dishes, he perked up. “Ah, medicine.” Reaching forward, Joshua opened the cabinet that usually held painkillers. Immediately, he furrowed his brow. “He’s already out of painkillers? What the heck…”

“Hm?”

“Nothing,” Seokmin said, immediately closing the cabinet. “He’s out of medicine. I’ll go get some.” 

Seokmin blinked, his lips quirking into a little smile. “Are you sure, Sir? I can-.”

“No, no!” Joshua said, shaking his head. “I uh… no, I can go. There’s a pharmacy nearby…” he trailed off when Seokmin’s smile widened a bit. “I heard…”

“Okay then.” Seokmin nodded. “Then I’ll make us all something to eat. Soup is probably good for him to get better quickly.” 

Joshua nodded his head, already turning and making his way towards the door. He quickly fumbled his shoes on his feet, listening as Seokmin opened the refrigerator and exclaimed: “This is the most food I think I’ve ever seen in his fridge.”

Joshua had to angle his head to keep his nose from turning up pridefully as he headed out the door. The last thing he needed was to dig himself even further into a hole he was already sinking into. With a handful of paces behind him, Joshua slowly began picking up into a slight jog as he started towards the pharmacy a few blocks down. On the way, he sneezed into his arm, groaning as he felt his sinuses twitch in discomfort.

“Either I’m getting sick, or Chan is talking about me.” He murmured to himself, unsure which was worse. ------------------

Chan finally managed to catch his breath as his pace slowed, looking around at his surroundings. It felt as if he;d searched every part of the city, yet no sign of Jisoo. He groaned, running a hand through his hair.

“Maybe this is a sign that I should just change my name and live out here, because Lord knows I’m never going to survive returning home without him.” He murmured to himself, voice trembling. As his paces slowed to a stop, Chan finally seemed to relax just long enough for his stomach to growl. “Ah!” He groaned in annoyance, throwing his head back and clutching his bangs. “What the hell, now is not a time to eat!”

“Hey!” Chan looked over at the voice calling to him, an old woman standing just outside an old, wooden hut. “If you’re going to cause a scene, do it somewhere else!” 

Chan sighed, nodding his head apologetically as he jogged over. “Sorry, Miss.” he said. “I’m just… I’m looking for someone, and I need to find him soon.”

The woman arched an eyebrow, eyeing Chan up and down. Chan, once again, bowed deeply, apologetic for screaming in front of her store. “What’s your name?”

“Lee Chan. I’m second in command as a guard for Hong Corporation in Seoul! I’m looking for my boss, and I’m worried about him.” The woman sighed, motioning inside.

“Let’s get you something to eat. Can’t handle all of that work on an empty stomach.” Chan chuckled, but was already led inside before he could politely decline. “Eunchae! Get something hot for our guest here!” She called through the door. A young girl poked her head out to survey the scene before disappearing once again. “Now, what’s this kid look like? Your boss. The heir to some fancy corporation in Seoul, you said?” The woman asked, motioning for Chan to sit down at an empty bench. He looked up just as a beer was placed in front of him, but he politely pushed it back towards the young man who set it there.

“Grandma, the Hong Corporation is like the biggest company in Korea!” The male said.

“Tsk, yeah, well I don’t see them coming around my parts, so I can care less about the one percent.”

“He’s tall, with sharp features and kind of short, black hair. He’s muscular had a tattoo on his bicep.” Chan pursed his lips. “Is kind of stubborn but not in a bad way-.”

“....Let me guess.” The old woman said immediately. “Demanding and impatient, too, huh?”

Chan paused for a minute. “Here… let me get a picture.” 

----------------

Joshua stumbled into the pharmacy, listening as the ding above the door echoed through the building. The cashier was standing behind the register, flipping through a newspaper, until his arrival pulled her attention. She greeted him sweetly as he followed the signs for the cold and flu section.

Joshua looked around at the different bottles, sprays, tablets, and liquids. Each and every bottle seemed to be the bottle needed to help cure Mingyu. He crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing the shelf as if it were challenging him to a duel. 

He grabbed a few different bottles, scanned the contents and the side effects, then put them back in favor for a different set of bottles. Rinse and repeat until Joshua had gone through every fever reducer and cough suppressant in the store. He hummed. 

“I guess it doesn’t really matter…” he mumbled to himself. As he took another handful of medicine, he pursed his lips. “There are flavors?! What… what flavor do I get?!”

He didn’t know Mingyu’s preferred flavor! As he scanned the bottles, he huffed. At this point, he should, a mental note to ask him in one of their games of twenty questions. As he looked, his eyes fell on the end cap of the aisle, where an array of different ‘Get well soon’ memorabilia was perched. Stuffed animals, cards, balloons. Joshua tilted his head, reaching for the little stuffed dog holding a plastic balloon that said ‘Get Well Soon’ written on it. Joshua turned it in his hands, pursing his lips together. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen something like this…” he mumbled to himself. 

I’ll make his favorite soup. 

His eyes fell to the clock on top of the register. “...I don’t have time for this,” he said, grabbing every medicine bottle he could carry. 

Joshua left that pharmacy with two big bags of medicines, fever reducers, cooling rags, and painkillers. Everything that the aisle provided was now in his bag. Thanking the woman, Joshua pocketed his wallet and started back towards the apartments. The bags were heavy, and he grimaced, but  he knew that he’d rather have to much and save the rest for the next time. 

How did I end up doing this? He thought to himself. I could have easily had this delivered! If that pharmacy even does delivery…. 

“Mingyu and I have been friends since college so I’d hope we’re close!”

“Oh… that’s why.” Joshua thought to himself, grimacing at the jealousy sitting right in his gut. The things I do for you, Kim Mingyu. If anyone ever caught me doing this, they’d-.

“Sir!”

Immediately, Joshua stopped in his tracks, head whipping around to the sound of his name frantically being called. Around the corner and a few paces away was Chan, also holding a giant bag in one of his hands and panting something fierce. He stopped when Joshua was in his sights, doubling over to catch his breath. The bag settled temporarily on the ground. “Sir! Thank God! I’ve been looking all over for you!” He stood up straight, hair damp with sweat and face flushed. “...What do you have? Did you seriously run away to have a shopping spree!? I would have came!”

“Ah…” This really was not one of Joshua’s most successful escapades, it seemed. Chan put his hands on his hips, head tilting to the side as he continued to catch his breath. This wasn’t good. Joshua needed to get this medicine back to Mingyu’s apartment. He turned back in the direction he was headed, then back at Chan. “Sorry.

“Sorry?” Chan shook his head. “Don’t be sorry, Sir, let’s just-.” 

Joshua grabbed the bags tightly in his hands and booked it back down the street, immediately turning down the first corner he could. He frantically heard Chan’s scream of frustration, before footsteps charging in his direction and another frantic “Sir, wait please!” 

“Chan, I’ll call you later!” Joshua managed to call over his shoulder, turning to see Chan just one  more time before he turned another corner. He pressed himself against a wall, his breath tight in his throat as Chan’s footsteps passed by the alley completely unaware. As he headed off, he heard Chan’s exasperated groan.

“I’m finally starting to understand how Mr. Lim got fired. Sir!” Chan called out,. Joshua waited until his guard was long gone, only peering around briefly and sighing in relief when there was nobody. He stepped out onto the sidewalk again, looking down at the bags still clutched in his hands. He could see his palms scratched red from the friction of the straps. 

With a deep sigh and a mental promise to compensate Chan later, Joshua started towards the apartments without issue. 

---------------

The first thing he heard when re-entering the house was Seokmin stepping out of Mingyu’s room, the creak of the bedroom door giving him away.

“I expect full details when you’re feeling better, Gyu.” The door clicked shut and footsteps were heard down the hall. “I knew he had some kind of sugar daddy.”

Joshua’s fingers tightened on the bags as he walked in. He didn’t have enough time to react before Seokmin noticed his haul, eyes widening in surprise. “You got… so much!”

“I didn’t know what to get.” He said, before pulling out everything he bought and setting it on the table. “Is he still asleep?”

“Mostly. Woke up for just a minute to eat.” He motioned to the pot of soup on the stove. Joshua glanced over. Seokmin shifted, a sudden tenseness appearing above both of them. “Heh… are you alright?”

Joshua nodded his head. “Yes.” He said. 

Seokmin served Joshua soup first, with a smaller bowl of rice. Joshua looked as it was set on the table with disposable chopsticks in front of them. He lifted them up and snapped them apart, eyes narrowing as a piece of wood went flying from the force. 

Seokmin picked up a few bottles and examined them much as Joshua had earlier, before picking two and popping them open. “I’ll go bring these too-.”

“Is that how he addresses me?” Joshua asked. Seokmin hummed, and the duo locked eyes. “When he’s with you and your boyfriend, does he say I’m his… sugar daddy?”

The bottle in Seokmin’s hand fell to the floor immediately, absolute horror on his face as he scrambled for a response. “Oh, you… You heard that?” Joshua nodded his head, eyebrow arched. “No! No, Sir, I’m so sorry!” He bowed deeply, gulping. “Please forgive me, I’m so sorry!”

He had to admit, a hint of relief flourished through his gut as Seokmin apologized, but he still felt uneasy. “Then what does he say?”

Seokmin stood upright, eyes still wide. He was fighting for his life with the next words out of his mouth. “He talks highly of you,” he said. “Very.” He shook his head. “He’s never told us that the guy he was seeing and his boss were the same person, but he always, always says how much he cares about you. In either role…”

“....Does he?” Joshua asked. Seokmin nodded.

“I’m sorry.” Joshua glanced at the medicine cabinet he’d suddenly brought into the apartment, and shrugged.

“I mean…” he sighed. “I guess it wouldn’t be wrong.”

“No, it’s clear it’s much more than that to Mingyu! I promise. Please just forget you ever heard that.” 

Joshua couldn’t help but chuckle, tilting his head to the side. “Fine. But this is a warning.” He said. Seokmin sighed in relief, once again bowing deeply in gratitude. “And if your soup isn’t good, I’ll deduct the warning. Understand?”

“Yes.” Seokmin nodded. “But it’s one of Mingyu’s favorites so I think you’ll really  like it.” 

Joshua glanced back down at the bowl, nodding his head. “Then I’m sure I will.” 

---------------

A dozen more apologies later and Seokmin had finally left for the evening. The soup was stored in the fridge, the medicine was put away, and Joshua was left with an unfamiliarly quiet apartment. He’d managed to convince Chan to go home as it got darker, saying he’d be staying out and apologizing for the trouble he had caused. Then, with nothing else to do, Joshua actually did some work. 

Well, he tried too. But it was challenging when he couldn’t stop turning towards the bedroom door, listening for any signs of life from Mingyu. Was he comfortable, did the sheets come off him, was he resting well? Should he go adjust the rag or check his fever? He didn’t have a clue about how to care for someone when they were sick, was he even doing it right? Should he have gotten the dog gift? 

As the moon hung in the sky and streamed light in through the living room windows, the bedroom door finally clicked open. Out walked Mingyu, rubbing his face. He still looked half-asleep, head hanging heavy on his neck and his hair slightly damp on his forehead from sweat. Joshua perked up a bit. “Hey you.” he said, watching as Mingyu started over to the table.

“What time is it?” Mingyu gurgled, his voice heavy with sleep. He covered his mouth to cough. Joshua looked back to his computer, closing out the document and the emails from Jeonghan he’d been dissecting for the past hour.

“Uhm, almost 9….” he said. Mingyu groaned. “Your friend Seokmin left a few hours ago. Are you feeling any better?”

“A little. I’m going to take more medicine and eat.”

“There’s more soup in the fridge,” Joshua said. He turned to Mingyu’s bedroom, where the empty bowl from before was probably still resting on the end table. Mingyu pulled out the little tupperware of leftover soup, and Joshua settled back in his chair, staring at his computer screen. He heard Mingyu shuffling around the kitchen, the microwave coming to life with a few button presses. 

Joshua headed into the kitchen to Mingyu, who seemed to have fallen asleep standing up. Joshua’s brows furrowed, reaching forward to press a hand to his forehead. “Mingyu?”

“Mm?” His head snapped up, but his eyes barely opened. Joshua frowned.

“You should go back to bed,” he glanced at the food in the microwave. “I can bring it to you…” 

Mingyu hummed, smiling a bit. He leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to Joshua’s forehead. Even his lips were warm, most likely from the fever, but Joshua couldn’t help but close his eyes and lean more into the touch. “Thank you… for coming by,” he murmured softly. 

“Sure…” Joshua said. “I didn’t do much, though.” 

“Mmm, not true. You robbed a pharmacy for me. Not many people would.”

“I didn’t know what to get!” Joshua’s eyes widened. Mingyu grinned, his arm hanging loosely along Joshua’s waist. Joshua glanced up at him, brushing hair back from his face. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

“Go home after, please.” Mingyu groaned. 

“No,” Joshua said. “I’m staying here. Don’t argue, I won’t let you win just because you’re sick.” 

The pair returned to the bedroom after Mingyu had eaten some more of the soup and a bit of rice, Mingyu sliding into bed and Joshua adjusting the rag on his forehead. He hummed. “You don’t feel as warm as you did this morning. So hopefully you’re getting better.”

“It’s because of the medicine.” Mingyu nodded reassuringly. “Thank you for getting it.”

Joshua’s cheeks turned pink and he huffed. “Sure…” he said. “Now go to sleep. I’ll take the couch…”

“Mm…” Mingyu nodded his head, eyes finally closing. It took a few minutes for his breathing to even out, and for snoring to overtake the room again, but when it did, Joshua felt his shoulders slump. 

“You’re just a big baby, hm?” he murmured to himself, adjusting the sheets to his chin before sinking onto the side of the mattress. 

“Can’t you stay with me?” 

A cough echoed through the room, broken and shaky and painful in the chest. Jisoo watched as his father’s wife turned from her spot in the door. They’d just gotten off the plane.

“And risk getting sick? We have two important meetings and a dinner for your father’s important clients, we can’t be sick for that. And neither can you. Now stop complaining and go to sleep.” And the door was closed.

And Jisoo did.  

Joshua glanced down at Mingyu, taking a deep breath as he settled on the edge of the bed. 

He talks very highly of you. 

Joshua tilted his head, reaching out to brush hair from Mingyu’s eyes and adjust the rag on his forehead. He wondered what Mingyu said to the people in his life, if anything at all. How he described their arrangement without saying names. How his expressions looked when he did so. Eventually, he’d go to sleep on the couch, but only when Mingyu was deep asleep. Or until Joshua found the answer to any of the questions bouncing around in his head. Eventually, he plopped down on the bed beside Mingyu and allowed his body heat to radiate into his side. 

They’d both rest easier that way.  

“Did we really need to pick this movie, Hyung?” 

Joshua's eyes flickered down, unable to hold back his smile. Mingyu's head rested on his lap, one hand over his eyes as a scary movie played on the TV. His hand lowered into Mingyu's hair, raking through the locks. 

“You're so dramatic.” He teased. “Willing to put your life on the line, but can't watch Paranormal Activity?”

“Ghosts don't swing knives in your direction!” His eyes widened as he looked up at Joshua. He watched as Mingyu lolled his head into Joshua's touch. 

Getting to know one another had been… interesting. Trying to stay true to their agreement had meant a lot of quiet questions in the dark, or random tidbits shared on long drives. Little nuggets of information - personal or silly - that made the two of them feel just a little bit closer. 

“You look comfortable at least.” He said. Mingyu hummed. “Did the painkillers kick in yet?”

“No.” Mingyu pouted. Joshua laughed a bit, raking his bangs back. 

Getting to know one another has also included sex. A lot of sex. 

“You’re vicious.” Mingyu snarled, a canine tooth poking out in his playful complaint. 

Joshua’s eyes sparkled down at him. “What? I like to take my time, what’s wrong with that? Besides, you weren’t complaining before.” 

A scream in the movie made Mingyu jump, turning back towards the movie with stunned eyes. “God, can we change this?”

“It’s almost over,” Joshua said, eyes lifting back up to the TV. Mingyu groaned, eyes closing as his brows furrowed together. “You can pick the next one, then.”

Mingyu huffed. “Fine.” And without another word, he rolled onto his side to face the movie again. Joshua hummed, eyes fluttering along Mingyu’s body laid out on the couch. 

“Good.” He said, reaching down and slapping his ass. Mingyu gasped, sitting upright and glaring at him with wide eyes. Joshua grinned. “What?!”

“That hurt!” Mingyu shouted, reaching out to wrap an arm around Joshua. Despite his muscular stature, Joshua was helpless as he was pulled into Mingyu’s orbit in a playful headlock, Mingyu’s other hand reaching along Joshua’s body to exact his revenge. Joshua wasted no time, squirming on the couch with an attempt to get free. 

---------------

With the movie over and both of them exhausted from what turned into a faux wrestling match on the couch, Mingyu and Joshua plopped into bed not long after. Joshua exhaled as the pillows supported his head, closing his eyes. “And you called me vicious.” he huffed. 

“Was I too rough?” Mingyu asked. “Sorry.” Joshua shook his head, unbothered. When the bed shifted, he looked over to see Mingyu closing in on him. This time though, it wasn’t to playfully pin him to the couch in an attempt to overpower him, but instead to cup his cheek and lean in to kiss him. Joshua didn’t realize he had gulped, eyes training on Mingyu as the duo’s lips locked. His hand flew to Mingyu’s bicep, curling into the skin underneath his tee shirt. He could feel Mingyu’s hand in his hair, the other brushing just under his tank top. No attempt to push it up, but just enough to brush against his skin. 

The duo stayed like this for a while, holding one another in the dark bedroom. Joshua felt Mingyu settle between his legs, focused now on slow, languid kisses. Joshua let a hand settle in the back of Mingyu’s head as he pulled away, batting his eyes up at him in the dark. Mingyu hummed, pressing their foreheads together. “You have really nice eyes.” His comment made Joshua chuckle.

“I know,” he said softly. He tilted his head, looking over all of Mingyu’s features. “We should go out,” he said. “On your next day off.” 

He watched as Mingyu’s smile softened in the dark, his hand raking through his hair and rubbing down along his side. “I can’t. I have plans.” 

“What?” Joshua watched as Mingyu rolled off of him. He turned to his side. “Can’t you do the plans on another day?”

“No, I can’t.” Mingyu sounded very apologetic as he spoke. “Besides, we can’t really stroll around hand-in-hand or anything. It’d cause problems.” 

“I know,” Joshua said. “But still…” Mingyu could see Joshua’s eyes in the dark, wide and doe-shaped as they blinked at him. If he were a weaker man, he’d have folded already, but he’s started to know better.

“I’m sorry, Hyung,” he said again. “Maybe another time,” he reached out. “Besides, that’s not until the end of the week. We’ll have plenty of time to hang out before then.” 

Joshua huffed. In one swift motion, he kicked his leg over Mingyu, straddling his hips and looking down at him. Mingyu hummed, blinking up at him. “There’s really no way I can convince you to change your mind?” He asked, his voice dropping a bit. “I’m pretty persuasive.”

Mingyu chuckled, but it was a bit more broken this time. Joshua would have thought he’d won when Mingyu reached up, his hands raking along Joshua’s sides. “Yes, you are,” he breathed into the dark. However, Mingyu swiftly flopped Joshua back onto his side, before laying back down on the bed. “But unfortunately, I can’t that day.”

“Tsk.” Joshua huffed. “You’re no fun.” Mingyu laughed. “Fine, fine. I fold.” 

“Good.” Mingyu shifted in the bed, and Joshua felt him curl into his side. “Now, we should cuddle and go to sleep.”

“I’m too annoyed at you to cuddle right now.” Joshua murmured behind a pout. Mingyu only whined his name, his arm flinging over Joshua’s middle as his head all but burrowed in his neck. With an exasperated huff, Joshua’s hand slipped under Mingyu’s head. “....Was it the movie?” he asked quietly.

“...No…” Mingyu responded softly. Joshua arched an eyebrow before Mingyu said a soft, embarrassed. “...Yeah, okay it was the movie.” 

---------------

Joshua tried to respect Mingyu’s wishes; he really did. But as the day of his next day off came around, he found it very hard to focus. He woke up that morning to the sound of muffled arguments downstairs, his father already raging on the phone to someone about something business related that he was sure to get an earful of later. Mrs. Hong was already slipping out to go on a shopping trip with her friends, and Joshua was left standing at the foot of the stairs watching as workers shuffled all around him, only a few frantically nodding in his direction. He reached out, stopping one of the cleaners in her tracks. “Can you tell my father I’m taking the day off?” He asked.

Her face paled. “What?” She asked, but Joshua was already out the door, grabbing his keys and slipping on his shoes before she could even call out to him. 

So, for the past forty-five minutes, Joshua was perched in his car outside Mingyu’s apartment. But no signs yet. Joshua sighed, lifting his sunglasses up over his head, and pushing the hints of regrown bangs back from his eyes. The sudden hit of sun in his eyes, even with grey clouds billowing nearby, made him recoil. But he turned to the apartment building he was parked in front of.

“Come on…” he pouted, resting his chin on the window, his arm dangling out of the car. He studied the door to the apartment building. 

When another few minutes passed, Joshua checked his watch. It was almost 10. “He’s supposed to be on call today. Tch, tell me he went to his part-time job.” He groaned, head lolling onto the seat. “Kim Mingyu, if you make me waste my entire day in this car waiting for you, I swear I’ll-.”

The apartment building doors opened, catching Joshua’s attention. His eyes were wide and alert as a well-dressed man with a backpack, holding flowers, let the door swing behind him. Joshua perked up, a grin forming on his mouth as he dangled his head out the car again, pillowing it on his arms. 

“There you are, Kim Mingyu~.” He cooed to himself, dropping the sunglasses back down over his face. He watched as Mingyu jogged down the apartment steps, clutching a stunning bouquet in his hand. There was an assortment of flowers, of every different color. “You shouldn’t have~!” Joshua called, finally catching Mingyu’s attention, stopping him just as he was about to get onto the street. 

“Hyung?” He blinked, immediately heading over to the car. He looked around inside. “What are you doing here? Is everything ok?” 

“Yes.” Joshua nodded, still grinning. 

Mingyu sighed in relief, before immediately frowning. “Chan must be worried sick! Shouldn’t you be at work?”  

“Don’t worry, he knows I’m out.”

“Well, have him come get you. Remember, it’s my day off. Not his.” 

“It’s my day off too.”

“Well, I told you I was busy today. I’m sorry, but I can’t entertain you.” Mingyu checked his phone, before pocketing it immediately after and turning towards the street.

“You're cute when you’re annoyed.” Joshua smirked.

“Then I must be adorable right now, Hyung.” Mingyu huffed, unable to hide a smile. Mingyu wasn’t letting up, and Joshua’s smile was falling. He shifted in his seat, facing forward again and starting up his car. 

“Where are you going, then? I’ll drive you.”

Mingyu’s expression softened. “That’s sweet, but I can take the bus.” 

“Nonsense. If you’re on call, it’s easier if we’re already together. Won’t have to leave.” Mingyu stood in the parking lot, shifting between his feet. 

“So basically I’m working for free today,” Mingyu said.

Joshua shrugged, eyes twinkling. “I’ll pay you later~.” he cooed. Mingyu’s ears tinted pink and he laughed, reaching over to unlock the car doors. Mingyu tilted his head back and groaned to the sky, Joshua watched his Adam’s Apple bob. “Yeah, I’ll definitely pay you.”

Mingyu motioned towards the street. “It’s an hour away…”

“Perfect.” Joshua grinned, hands tightening on the steering wheel. “I have new songs on my driving playlist..” 

—————

Joshua’s grip on the steering wheel tightened, watching as Mingyu got out of the car first, shutting the door behind him. He walked a few paces out of the parking lot; the grey clouds almost looked like they were following him as he moved. When he turned around, Joshua turned off the car and stepped out, closing his own car door. Mingyu was standing under a metal sign that had been working against it, slightly rusted in sections. The top of the arch had the name of the place on it. 

The duo stood in silence, Joshua sighing as he slipped his glasses back over his head. 

“It’s… a cemetery.” Joshua pointed out. 

Mingyu only nodded, his face solemn and almost apologetic. “I can catch the bus back if you don’t want to stay. I’ll be here for a while. Thank you for the ride.” Mingyu turned around and continued walking towards the archway of the cemetery. Joshua turned to his car. He locked it, tucked the keys into his back pocket, and jogged after Mingyu. 

Kim Minho was farther back in the cemetery, the duo having to walk down several dirty paths in order to reach the spot. A few other families were scattered around at different plots, laying flowers and sobbing against the marble headstones. He felt uneasy. He’d only ever been to funerals, never cemeteries. He looked down, immediately regretting his decision to wear a comfortable, green tee shirt and white slacks. He tugged at the sleeves of his shirt as if it would cover the hints of tattoo poking out from underneath.

Unreal. He thought to himself, his tongue pressing against his cheek. 

“You look fine.” When he looked back up, Mingyu smiled. “My dad isn’t a stickler for dressing up nice. I don’t think he’ll mind.”

When the duo reached the section of the cemetery holding Mr. Kim’s grave, Joshua’s pace slowed. The plot of land was secluded, just close enough to the indoor mausoleum on the grounds, with benches and chairs scattered nearby. At the head of the land was a magnificent tombstone, decorated with a picture of Minho smiling right on the front. Mingyu knelt down to pay his respects, and Joshua quietly eyed the writing on the tombstone.

Kim Minho

Loving Son and Father

May He Rest in Peace

Mingyu set the flowers he’d brought in what resembled a cup holder on the side, discarding the previous bouquet that had long since died from lack of upkeep. Joshua stayed a few paces back, eyes locked on Mingyu. His head was low, hands clasped together and eyes tightly shut. It only took a matter of seconds to realize how out of place Joshua felt. 

Mingyu finally turned around, standing to his feet and smiling sweetly at Joshua. “I plan to be here a while.” He reiterated, his voice soft. It was like he was already tired. “I’m sorry.” 

“It’s.. whatever.” Joshua shifted, seeing an open bench a few paces away. Mingyu must have noticed it too; his hand pressed on the small of Joshua’s back as he started guiding him there. The duo settled in, and Joshua was already feeling the warmth practically radiating off Mingyu’s body. He looked down at the bench legs, seeing a handful of daisies blooming right beside them. 

“...Your father was nice enough to help arrange the funeral,” Mingyu said, and Joshua looked up. “And he even paid for that tombstone. We never would have afforded it otherwise.” 

Joshua swallowed the scoff in his throat, simply nodding his head. “I remember him talking about that…” he said softly. He glanced at the tombstone himself, thinking back to that day. He remembered standing just outside the room, barely glancing in at two teenagers dressed in all black. His father and his wife slid through and chatted for a minute. Joshua only tightened his fists at his sides, looking down at his feet. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to go in?” Junhui had asked. 

Joshua didn’t even respond with words then, just a simple shake of the head. 

The fingers on Joshua’s shoulder brushed against the neck of his neck, just at the edge of his collar, and he hummed softly. “I thought I saw someone there that day,” he said. “Just waiting outside.” 

Joshua nodded. “Yup, that was me,” he said. “My father was getting so much praise from the public for offering to help you with funeral arrangements, tombstones, and burials,” he motioned to the tombstone a few feet away. “Then afterwards, he’d be at my throat because the public had thought I was smoking when I was out with friends. And it got all over the news.” Mingyu nodded, pursing his lips together. 

“I remember a little bit about that,” he said. 

“You had more important things to worry about,” Joshua assured. “I bet the cover-up he got in the news for what he did was a bonus.” He took a shaky breath, the venom dripping off his tongue at the thought burning into his skin. Mingyu shifted then, his arm finally retracting from Joshua’s shoulder. He looked over as Mingyu leaned forward, elbows on his knees and chin in his hands. The duo was silent for a minute, then Joshua fiddled with his hands while Mingyu stared silently at his father’s grave. Joshua kept sneaking glances at Mingyu. For the first time in their relationship, he looked solemn. He wasn’t expressive or smiling; he wasn’t shouting or angry. He was just silent, looking far off to somewhere that wasn’t here. And maybe Joshua was being a bit self-centered, but he couldn’t help but feel guilty.

“You’re so rude, Jisoo.” 

His father’s comment after leaving the funeral home slammed into him, and he sucked in a big breath.

“...Sorry.”

Mingyu glanced over, meeting Joshua’s gaze again. His lips twitched into a smile. “No, no. It’s ok,” he assured. “You don’t have to be sorry. I’m glad you told me.”

Joshua watched Mingyu rest a hand on his knee, a silent show that he wasn’t upset by Joshua’s words. But he was, even just a little bit. Joshua didn’t like this look on Mingyu, and didn’t want to see it again after they’d just started to repair things up. “I thought not going in to pay my respects was more of a dig at my father back then,” he said. “But it was probably more disrespectful to you and your sister… So… I’m sorry.”

Mingyu’s smile stayed soft, his hand squeezing Joshua’s knee. “I appreciate that,” he said gently, and the bench fell back into silence. “So…. did you?” Mingyu asked through the silence. Joshua looked up, brows furrowed. “Smoke. Did you smoke?”

“Wha- oh, God no. I don’t smoke.” Joshua chuckled. Mingyu finally managed an amused laugh, nodding his head.

“Good, because that’s a deal breaker for me.” 

“Oh is it?” Joshua said. Mingyu nodded his head, his eyes a bit brighter now as he leaned back against the bench. Joshua followed suit. His head lolled to the side, resting comfortably on Mingyu’s shoulder. He felt the other drop it down a bit to easily accommodate his cheek, and Joshua let out a soft exhale. 

Every time there was silence, one of them felt the need to fill it. This time, it was Joshua’s turn. “If I can ask, what was he sick with?” Mingyu bit down on his fingernail, lips pursed tightly around it as he thought. He could see in Mingyu’s eyes that it must have been a while since he thought about it, or at least since someone had asked.

“Colon cancer.” He said when he felt enough time passed. “We didn’t know until it was too late. He got diagnosed during my last year in high school, but it was already really aggressive. He was sick for about eight months, in and out of the hospital.” 

“Oh…” Joshua said softly. 

“Yeah. He was told he only had seven more months to live. He just wanted to go home and ride it out. So, we took him home…” he shifted. “..He died in just three..” 

“That’s fast…” Joshua breathed. He looked down, lowering his own hand to interlace their fingers together. Mingyu nodded his head. “Do you visit often?”

“When I can. It’s hard now, waiting for a bus and driving an hour out here.” He explained. “So when I come, I kinda just sit here most of the day.”

Joshua hummed. “…Tell me something about him.” Mingyu looked over. “I knew your dad as a worker for my father, not as a dad.” He lifted his head momentarily, eyeing the photo of Kim Minho put in the rock. 

“Uhm… okay, then.” Mingyu shifted, racking his brain for a good story. Joshua watched his brows furrow and his lips tug together in thought, until he finally began. “Well, I was a really sensitive kid. I cried over everything.”

“Did you really?”

“Why don’t you sound shocked?” Mingyu looked down at him. “Well, anyway, when I had a problem as a kid, I’d go to him.” Mingyu kicked his leg over the other. “He’d always be on the couch like this on his days off, reading the paper.” His ankle tapped at the edge of the bench, and Joshua followed his movements. “When I had a problem, or I needed advice, I’d sit right in front of him, and I’d cry.” 

Joshua hummed, listently silently. Mingyu as a kid… that was something he wanted to see.

Mingyu looked down towards the floor, as if he were watching what he said come to life in real time; a memory playing before them, and Joshua could almost visualize it. 

“Dad, I don’t know what to do!” Mingyu would sob. 

Silence from his father for a minute.“You’re smart, of course, you know what to do.” 

“No, that’s not it. I don’t know what to doooo.” And the sobbing would continue. It’d be that way until the tears finally bubbled away, until his nose stopped running and his body stopped shaking. He’d lean his forehead against the front of the couch and sniffle, eyes closed tightly. 

“Done now?” Mingyu would look up, nodding his head and sniffling. “Did you make a decision?” Mingyu, again, nodded his head. His father would close the paper and set it aside, fixing his glasses and taking a sip of his drink. “Mingyu, if you made a decision that you thought was best, then you made the right decision. Nothing will change just because you cry about it.”

Joshua thought he saw a hint of a tear in Mingyu’s eye when he looked back up, but Mingyu was already wiping it away. Joshua perked up a bit, tightening their interlocked hands. “I didn’t understand it at the time,” he said. “I still don’t really. But it always made me feel better. So I think about it even now.” 

“I don’t know what it feels like.” Joshua breathed. “Having a parent you can miss properly.” He said. 

Mingyu nodded his head. “I didn’t think I’d ever know the feeling,” he admitted. “At least not for a long time.” Joshua felt Mingyu move again, his cheek jostling on his shoulder. “My mother left us when I was a little kid, and my dad told me she passed away when I was 12. He was sad about it, but I didn’t know what it felt like. I didn’t know her.” Joshua looked down when he felt his hand shake. “But I know now… and it really fucking hurts.” 

Joshua only pulled away momentarily, digging in his bag and pulling out a little pack of tissues. “Here,” he said softly, passing them over. Mingyu took them with a mouthed ‘Thanks’. “What was your decision?” Joshua asked after a minute. 

“Hm?” Mingyu looked cute when his brow furrowed, his eyes slightly red as he dabbed them with the tissues.

“You said when you visit your dad, it’s usually because you worry you made a bad decision.” He shifted. “What decision was it this time?”

“Mmm.” Mingyu puckered his lips, rubbing his thumb over them. “I needed to know if bringing you here with me was a good choice or not.”

“Hey!” Joshua’s eyes widened. “Really?!” Mingyu’s puckered lips morphed into a grin, and he laughed. “Don’t laugh! What? Do you really regret accepting the drive? Well, then don’t expect it anymore!” Joshua crossed his arms over his chest. 

“What? No.” Mingyu snickered. “I didn’t think you’d be so hurt.”

“It’s an hour both ways, that’s not my job, you know!” 

“You offered.” Mingyu snickered. Joshua huffed, kicking one leg over the other and crossing his arms. “I didn’t have a question for him today….” 

“Mm?” Joshua’s face softened as Mingyu got up, dusting off his pants. 

“I haven’t seen him in a while.” His hands slipped into his pockets, and Joshua caught how they tensed against the fabric. “Just… missed him a little extra today…”

---------------

“We should head back.”

Mingyu’s voice made Joshua’s eyes flicker open, sitting up straight. A faint roll of thunder was heard in the distance, a sharp chill brushing across his shoulders. His head lolled to Mingyu, who was already up from the bench. 

“Ah, uh…” Joshua ran a hand through his hair. “Did I fall asleep?”

“Mmm. Just for a few minutes.” Joshua caught the fond way Mingyu was looking at him. “It was cute, so–.”

Maybe it was the burning in the back of Joshua’s neck b,ut he turned his head, resting his chin on his fist. “Tsk, letting me be cute for free. I could fire you for that.” But he could tell it wasn’t working on Mingyu. 

“The snobbiness doesn’t hit as hard when you were just snoring on a bench.” 

“I was snoring?” Joshua’s eyes widened. Mingyu snickered. He turned on his heel, avoiding the embarrassed scolding by heading over to his father’s tomb. Joshua got off the bench, dusting off his pants. Mingyu bowed his head, putting his hand up to readjust the flowers he’d set in the holder. 

“Ready?” Mingyu asked. Joshua nodded his head. “I'm starving. Maybe we can grab some lunch before we get home?”

“Alright.” He agreed. Joshua put his hand in his pocket, eyes locked on the grey clouds above them as he stood up. “We should probably go before it starts raining.” 

Mingyu stood in front of the grave one more time, a moment of silence as the smell of rain got thicker. Joshua was still waking up, yawning with every rumble of thunder in the distance that got louder and closer. His eyes followed the skyline, eyeing the grey clouds rumbling over them. In a second, a raindrop hit his eye. Then another, and another, until before they knew it, rain was starting to fall in sheets. “Ah, shit!” He covered his head. 

Luckily, there was a small awning just off the path, a mausoleum with memorial boxes inside. The duo sprinted underneath, luckily only a little damp from the rain. Joshua shook his hair, his tee shirt sticking to his shoulders. “Well, that’s great.” 

“Here.” Joshua heard Mingyu over the rain slamming on the awning, suddenly feeling something slump onto his head. Joshua blinked, looking up to see a large, black suit coat draped over his head. Mingyu was already rolling up his sleeves, brushing his hair back. Joshua bit his lip. “Can I have your keys?”

“Huh?” Joshua leaned forward. 

“Your keys. Hand me your keys. I’ll bring the car up closer.” 

Joshua’s heart slammed extra hard in his chest, his hand coming up to hold onto Mingyu’s coat. “Why would I–.”

“You want to catch a cold?” Mingyu’s eyebrow lifted, hands on his hips. “I’ll be right back, no use in both of us getting soaked to the bone.”

“But Mingyu–.” Mingyu stuck his hand out, tilting his head. Joshua sighed, digging in his pocket and passing his keys over to Mingyu. 

“Okay. I’ll be right back. Wait here.”

“What else am I supposed to do? You’re taking my keys.” Joshua said. Mingyu flashed a grin and immediately began sprinting through the rain as the current rumble of thunder ended.

Alone with only the rain to occupy him, Joshua sighed. He tugged the coat tighter around himself, looking up as if he could see it over his head. “Idiot…” 

Mingyu would be a few minutes, running through the rain, getting the car, and heading back to pick up Joshua. He looked in the direction of the gravesite they were standing in. 

Joshua tightened his hold on the jacket and, with a deep breath, hurried towards the grave. He immediately felt water seeping through the jacket and into his skin. He shivered, but continued forward until he was standing just by the bench. He knelt down, yanking up a few daisies from the leg. They were soaking wet, a bit heavy. “They're not much but….” He turned back, making his way to the tombstone. He gulped, kneeling down to place the daisies inside the bouquet Mingyu had already left. His offering was much smaller than Mingyu’s, but the daisies blended in rather nicely with the other colorful flowers in the bouquet. 

Mingyu would be back with the car any minute, so Joshua kept his moment short. Quickly, Joshua bowed in front of Mingyu’s father. He didn’t have much to say, but he simply nodded his head before turning and darting back to the awning where Mingyu would be. 

Mingyu had the car parked outside, leaning toward the passenger’s seat. Joshua hurried over, opened the door and slipped into the passenger’s seat. He sighed, finally closing his eyes and exhaling a deep breath.

“I was gone for two minutes. Where did you go? And why are you all wet?” 

Joshua looked over. “I thought my wallet fell out of my back pocket.” He said. Mingyu cocked an eyebrow. “What?” 

Mingyu chuckled, shaking his head a bit. Joshua was wet, but Mingyu was truly soaked to the bone, his hair damp in front of his face. His shirt was basically soaked through. Yes, Joshua absolutely did clock the way his muscles were perfectly visible. 

As the engine roared to life, Joshua shifted in his seat. “So… I’m staying over ,right?” Mingyu caught his gaze, pulling the car into drive and heading out of the parking lot. “Until the rain stops.”

Mingyu smiled. “I mean… sure, if you want.” 

Joshua nodded his head. “Yeah. We need a shower.”

“Ah, ulterior motives, hm?” Mingyu snickered. Joshua watched as his arms flexed on the steering wheel, immediately turning to stare out the window. He clutched Mingyu’s suit coat closer to him, despite it now being just as wet from the rain.  

---------------

Mr. Hong tapped his fingers on his desk, heavy beats echoing through his office. His eyes flickered towards the clock. He listened as rain splattered against the windows in a rhythmic pattern. It’d be soothing if Mr. Hong weren’t on edge.

“All the meetings I have scheduled today and I need to handle this nonsense.”

A knock on the door temporarily pulled him from his frustrations, and with a commanding ‘Come in!’ it clicked and pushed open. His eyes studied the door as his guest walked in. “Seungcheol.” he said. “Have a seat.”

Seungcheol looked around, nodding his head politely as he took the first seat across from Mr. Hong at his desk. The duo was silent for a while, and Mr. Hong took a deep breath. “I need to ask you a question.”

Suengcheol squirmed in his seat, and Mr. Hong got the most sickening taste of deja vu watching him. “What is it?”

“My son took a day off at the last minute today.” He began. Seungcheol’s eyebrows furrowed, leaning forward slightly as if he didn’t hear clearly. 

“...And you think I know?” 

“I’ll be blunt.” Mr.  Hong said. “I’m going off patterns. The last time my son was taking time off of his duties at random times to travel around, it was during school…” his gaze sharpened. “With you.” Seungcheol’s shoulders went rigid, eyes widening slightly. “Junhui might know, but I worry he’s too loyal to my son to say anything.” His head tilted a bit, piercing through Seungcheol’s body with his gaze. “But you’re not.”  

Seungcheol’s eyes twitched a bit, maybe in guilt or shame, but Mr. Hong really didn’t care. He slipped a piece of paper across the table, watching as Seungcheol picked it up to reveal a photo of a cell phone ping. “I managed to hear from… sources, that he was seen traveling to Suwon.” 

Mr. Hong could see Seungcheol’s mind thinking in real time. If his brain was a machine, steam would be coming out of his ears. After a minute of studying the photo,  “Sir, I have no idea why he’s in Suwon.” Seungcheol said, leaning back in his seat. “I don’t know why your son does anything, really.”

“Mm..” Mr. Hong took the paper back. “For once, I agree with you, Seungcheol.” He glanced back at the clock on the wall, before waving his hand towards the door. “You can go.” Seungcheol nodded his head, getting up and bowing politely. He turned on his heel and started right out the door, allowing it to close behind him. Alone, he sighed, rubbing his temple. “That ungrateful fucking brat…” he grumbled.

Another knock on the door, but this one didn’t wait for permission to enter. He looked up to see Mr. Park approaching, arms carrying two manila envelopes. “What did you find out, Mr. Park?” he asked.

“Suwon only has one notable connection to the company and your son in particular, Sir.” he said simply. He set the manila folder down, and Mr. Hong wasted no time opening it. Staring before him was a myriad of photos and newspaper articles from about five years prior.

Hong Family Supports Dedicated Guard! Pays Funeral Expenses in Full!

Mr. Hong’s jaw tightened as he moved past the news articles to the photos of the gravesite in question, and its inhabitant. “

“Previous COS Kim Minho was buried there. The father of-.”

“Look into this, immediately.” Mr. Hong demanded as he closed the file, shoving it back into his assistant’s hold. “I need to call my son.” 

---------------

Achoo!

“Ugh.” Joshua shook his head, rubbing his nose and sniffling. “Damn it, I better not be getting sick.” He felt a nudge, looking over to see Mingyu passing a tissue in his direction. “Thanks.” He blew his nose, tossing the tissue away as Mingyu stuffed the last of the groceries into the fridge. “God, your fridge looks so much better.”

“Yeah, well you went overboard.” Mingyu chuckled, closing the fully stocked fridge. 

“Hardly. Your fridge was totally empty.” Mingyu grinned, resting his hip against the counter as Joshua walked towards him. During the first part of the long trip home, Joshua had placed a mobile order for groceries. By the time they’d arrived home, showered and changed into dry clothes, eight large grocery bags were stacked in front of Mingyu’s apartment door. Joshua leaned against Mingyu, pressing his hands on either side of the counter he was leaning on. “I did you a favor. You’re welcome.” 

“Thank you.” Mingyu replied cheekily, his nose scrunching in amusement. He reached down, tugging at the oversized tee shirt that Joshua had all but claimed as his own and the hint that it was all he had put on. “Hungry?”

“Mm, I did say I’d pay you for today.” Joshua cooed. Mingyu shook his head, smirking before turning away. 

“I can make some chicken noodle soup to warm up.” He said, already reaching into the fridge for the ingredients. Joshua watched Mingyu move around them, setting all of the ingredients and utensils out to start cooking. “Wanna help?”

“Help?” Joshua cocked an eyebrow. “I don’t-.”

“Just come here and cut up the garlic and onions.” Mingyu reached out, gently leading Joshua to his side. He started by showing him how to cut the ingredients, doing it with such ease it almost looked magical. Joshua watched until his attention was pulled to the table, a vibrating sound beating off the table with a demanding presence. Joshua peered over just enough to see Father glowing up on the screen. His heart dropped, and his eyes flickered to Mingyu. “Who is it?” He asked curiously.

“Oh uh…” Joshua watched as the phone finally grew quiet again, fading to black as the call went ignored. Relief washed over him. “Just Junhui. I’ll call back when I finish.”

“Oh, well you can call if you–.” Another vibrating sound cut them both off, Mingyu’s attention now pulled from the half-cut garlic in his hand. Joshua followed his gaze, seeing Mr. Hong flashing on his screen. “Hm. Lemme-.”

“Here.” Joshua turned him back around, slipping in front of him and taking hold of the knife. Mingyu’s body tensed at the sudden movement, but Joshua only coaxed him back in by pressing his back up against him. “Help me.”

“But-.”

“It’s nobody. A number you don’t have saved in your phone.” Joshua reached his hand around, taking Mingyu’s and guiding it back to cover his own, both of them holding the knife. “Now show me how to do this.”

Mingyu still seemed confused, wanting to answer the call, but Joshua kept his grip firm. He could feel Mingyu’s body heat radiating into his back, his heart beating against him. Why was his father calling the both of them now of all times? Did he slip up? Whatever the case may be, Joshua didn’t want to pop the bubble he’d found himself in right now. His grip tightened on Mingyu’s hand.

“You’re shaking.” Mingyu’s voice was soft behind him, and Joshua’s shivered, craning his neck to look back. His face was slightly concerned, an eyebrow arched and lips tight.

“Oh yeah, well…” he looked down at the ingredients once again. He swallowed, shrugging his shoulders. “I’ve just never done this before.”

“Namjoo, this is Hong Jisoo. I’m sure you two know each other, though, right?”

“Yes…”

“Perfect! Then come sit down and join us!” 

The warm water funnelled down the drain as Namjoo stepped onto the cool bathroom tile. She took a few steps to wrap a towel around herself and slip into her favorite fuzzy slippers. Her pajamas were hanging up by the door, and once she was dried off and her nightly routine was complete, Namjoo wasted no time getting dressed before it got any chillier. 

She’d been busy most of the day, yet she still felt her work wasn’t done. With a cup of tea and some snacks brought to her by the maid, Namjoo perched at her desk and flipped open her sketchbook. She flipped through old pages, spanning years of designs, both good and bad. Her fingers brushed along little pieces of fabric she stapled inside of the years, which really started to bulk the book out a bit. “I’m going to need a new one of these soon,” she mused to herself. 

Just as she grabbed a pencil and a clean sheet of paper, her phone began ringing. She exhaled, dropping her pencil immediately and turning to her bed. For a moment, she thought to ignore the call, feign being asleep. But upon further inspection, the name Oppa flashed on the top, and a photo of her and Jisoo that they’d taken at the fashion show overtook the screen. Leaning forward, Namjoo answered the phone. “Yes, my love~?” She teased, plopping onto the edge of the bed. 

“Don’t start.”

Namjoo pouted. “Hey, now. What did I do?” Joshua was silent for a long minute; only the sound of feet shuffling on the floor came through on the other line. Namjoo raised an eyebrow. “Oppa.” She called, but there was no answer. “Hey… Oppa.” Namjoo raised her voice, grateful she lived alone. 

After a minute, Joshua finally spoke: “It’s just all fucking bullshit.” His voice was wobbly.

“What is?”

“All of it!” 

Namjoo frowned when she thought she heard a bit of an exasperated sigh escape the other end of the line. Jisoo’s breath seemed to be labored. “Oppa, what’s wrong? You know you can tell me anything.”

“I thought I could!” 

“...What?” Namjoo questioned.

“I thought I could, but clearly I can’t! What the hell did you say to-.” Jisoo paused. “...Mingyu….” Namjoo’s eyes widened at the whispered name. 

“What? When?”

“Don’t play dumb at the fashion show! He’s been weird ever since. What did you do?!” 

“I didn’t do anything!” Namjoo gasped. “Oppa, come on!” 

“Of course you did! It had to be you because then who else would it have been!?”

Namjoo exhaled a bit, rubbing her temple. “Okay… okay… Oppa, please. I didn’t say anything to Mingyu about anything. I didn’t even talk to him, ask Minghao.” Jisoo fell quiet then, minus another exhausted sigh that sounded more broken than the first. Logic was winning over his tidal wave of emotions. “You told me not to do anything, and I didn’t. I don’t know what he knows…”

“What he knows?” Jisoo questioned. Almost immediately, a soft: “Oh…”

“Yeah.” Namjoo clicked her tongue. “Listen. I bet you a million dollars you’d be the same way if you saw him kissing some random girl all night and you couldn’t say anything, right?” Again, Jisoo was silent. 

“It’s… not like that…”

“Oh, right.” Namjoo rolled her eyes. “Sure, okay.” Rising to her feet, Namjoo couldn’t help but smile. “Listen, Oppa, you interrupted my pre-bedtime doodling. My inspiration could be ruined all night because of this.”

“Tsk, what?! Well ,I-.”

“I guess I’ll just have to fix this problem so it doesn’t happen again. Like a good wife does.” She sighed. “What would you do without me?” Finally, a soft chuckle on the other end of the line. “Go wipe your eyes, alright?” 

“What? I didn't cry-.”

“Goodniiiight~!.” She cooed, before hanging up her phone. Looking down at the screen as it went dark, Namjoo sighed to herself. A minute later, she called another number in her contacts. It rang for a moment before she spoke. “Soojinnie? Can you schedule lunch for tomorrow? Around 12.” 

—-----------------

Another car ride the next day, but this time, Mingyu took his own advice and had Junhui at least join the duo. That allowed him to talk to Jisoo for the majority of the drive, making it a less silent ride but still incredibly awkward. Mingyu was stuck silently listening to the day’s schedule and praying it went fast, because the next day was his day off. It was really needed after these past few days.

As Mingyu pulled up to the front of the building, Jisoo spoke up: “What the…” The bodyguard stepped out of the car, rounding it to open the door for Jisoo. He got out to get a better look at the workers lining the front entrance, peering out the windows towering over them, whispering amongst themselves. They’d only been here a few seconds, but it was very clear that whatever was going on, one of these three was involved. Joshua looked at Junhui. 

“I have no idea.” He said immediately.

“Jisoo.” The trio looked over to the front entrance, and Jisoo inhaled an incredibly sharp breath. Mingyu could see his shoulders tense as it became clear that Mr. and Mrs. Hong were waiting outside.

“What the hell is going on?” Jisoo asked again, his voice softer and more wobbly this time. Mingyu bit the inside of his lip, quickly motioning for Jisoo to start walking. 

When they reached the steps, Mr. Hong wasted no time speaking. “You’re almost on time today,” he said. “Good.”

“What is all this?” Jisoo asked. “Is this about Bullet Transportation? Or are you sending me away again?” 

“Hm. Do I need to?” He asked. 

“I’m sure you’ll make up a reason either way.” Mr. Hong was silent, and Jisoo simply crossed his arms over his chest, looking to the side as his father continued. “No, it’s not about either of those things. Miss. Noh is here.”

Jisoo sighed. “....That’s it?” He asked. Mingyu could almost sense the relief on his body. “Okay, fine, where is she?” 

“Coming down now, I had someone call for her.” Jisoo looked at his assistant.

“Did I have a lunch scheduled that I forgot about?” he asked. Junhui shook his head immediately. 

“She’s not here for you.” Mr. Hong’s voice caught the trio’s attention. Mr. Hong looked over at Mingyu, who immediately tensed. “She’s here to see Kim Mingyu.”

Mingyu’s eyes widened, his heart almost busting out of his throat. He looked down at Jisoo, who for the first time in two weeks properly caught his gaze. Both of them looked panicked, an equal amount too, with wide eyes and silent questions on if the other knew what was going on. Based on the silence, it seemed neither did.

Namjoo and Minghao finally came out, Namjoo fixing her purse. She looked down at the absolutely shell-shocked trio. “Hi, Oppa.” she smiled. “I won’t be long, okay?”

Jisoo walked over to her, taking her arm and leaning close. “What the hell are you doing?” he whispered. Namjoo smiled, leaning in to kiss his cheek. Well, kind of, Mingyu could see her lips press against the shell of his ear. He couldn’t make out what was being said, but she patted his shoulder. She didn’t seem phased at all, but Joshua looked like he was about to pass out. Whatever she said, it didn’t help. 

“Jisoo, my office. Now.” Mr. Hong demanded. The heir offered some more glance at Mingyu and Junhui, barely able to form a coherent sentence as Junhui led him inside. 

As Jisoo and his father disappeared into the building, the crowds finally dispersed, leaving just Namjoo, Minghao, and Mingyu. She turned to him and smiled. “Hope you’re hungry.” she cooed sweetly. —-----------------

Mingyu was taken to a very extravagant lunch spot about 40 minutes from his job, one that he’d never been to before. It was modern, with greenery all over the sides and perched on every window. Inside, the set up is cozy yet elegant, with sleek high top tables and booths scattered about. The entire front lobby was the size of Mingyu’s entire apartment, and he could only imagine what the inside looked like. 

The pair were seated at a booth in the far corner, and despite Mingyu’s sense of deja vu starting to gnaw at his stomach, he ultimately was first to pull Namjoo’s chair out for her. She looked stunned, turning to Minghao. He had his own hand outstretched, seemingly planning to do the same thing. 

“He’s coming for your job, Hao.” she teased.

“Sorry, force of habit.” Mingyu said. Minghao cocked an eyebrow, but said nothing as he stepped to the side. Namjoo sat down in her seat as Mingyu sat across from her. The waitress came by quickly to get them drinks, and silence fell over them. Namjoo scanned her menu, fixed a loose strand of hair, and took a quick scan of the room around them. With every quiet second that passed, the curiosity made Mingyu want to crawl out of his skin. Was… was Mingyu supposed to make the conversation? Okay, then… 

“You-.” He choked out the word before he could stop himself, and Namjoo finally looked up. “The show was amazing the other day.” 

“Oh, thank you.” she smiled sweetly. “I think it was a success. I’m excited for the official release.” Mingyu nodded his head. “I’m slowly getting a lot more responsibility in my family’s company.”

“I-I see.” Mingyu was confused.

Namjoo closed her menu and said: “I’m hoping to do as much as I can before I ultimately get married.” 

Mingyu caught his next breath square in his throat, and it pushed itself back out his ears and mouth, causing him to turn his head and cough into his hand. Shit. Fuck. Okay, think Mingyu. You can do this. 

Namjoo was staring at him when he looked back, still smiling. Mingyu smiled back, softly. “I know. Congrat-.”

“Don’t do that.”

Fuck. I’m going to die. This is my last meal.

“Wh-what?” His voice cracked.

Namjoo sighed. “Joshua told me. About the two of you.” 

Mingyu felt dizzy at the comment. How many people were going to find out about them before this became the worst-kept secret in Korea?! Mingyu swallowed hard, watching as Namjoo opened her mouth again. “You look like you’re going to faint.”

“Me? Do I? Oh uh… it’s hot in here,” he laughed nervously. “Sorry.”

“Mingyu,” she said softly. “I’m not here to hurt you. Or intimidate you. None of that.” Mingyu blinked, and Namjoo rested against the table. “Is it true?”

Mingyu bit his lip, nodding his head. “Yes…” he whispered, his head falling forward apologetically. Shamefully. 

Namjoo hummed. “Did he tell you about us? About how he and I wound up in this position?”

Mingyu glanced up. “Just that you were together in college and… that you knew what he was doing. But I didn’t… I was always wary about the last part.” Namjoo nodded. Many apologies and begs for mercy bubbling in his throat, but all that managed to slip out was a strained: “I’m sorry. I don’t…” he inhaled. “I don’t know what to say…”

Namjoo let out a breathless chuckle. “I figured you wouldn’t. I just want you to listen.” A brief pause as the waitress returned with some drinks, and Namjoo kindly asked for another few minutes to look over the menu. When they were alone again, Namjoo continued. “Jisoo means a lot to me.” Mingyu caught her expression when he looked up, as she looked out the nearby window with a faraway, nostalgic look in her eyes. “He really does.” 

“I know. I… shouldn’t have gotten involved with him, knowing he’s engaged. I’m sure you’re upset, I’m sorry, I–.”

“No!” Namjoo suddenly looked panicked. “No, no.” Sitting up straighter, she exhaled. “No, I’m not upset. Like I said, he told me about you from the first night. You met at Waterbomb, right?” Mingyu nodded, chewing a hole through his bottom lip. “Yeah. I didn’t know you were at the same company at first, but I put it together.” she chuckled. “I didn’t bring you here to threaten you or expose you or anything. I wouldn’t do that to Jisoo.” 

“Then why–.”

“We’ve been ‘together’ in whatever sense you want to read it as since we were 19.” she inhaled. “I’ve been lucky enough that he trusts me with the deepest, darkest parts of himself.” She looked at him. “I just want to make sure the people he’s involved with are worthy of knowing those things too.”

Mingyu gulped. “He…. He hasn’t told me much of anything.” He admitted. “I know he doesn’t get along with his parents as much as people think he does.” Namjoo nodded. “I don’t know if he trusts me with that information yet.” 

Mingyu didn’t expect to be told everything about Jisoo’s life right after their first night together, or ever. But saying that out loud, that Mingyu knew nothing about the person he was involved with after all this time, stung a little. Deep in his chest. “Like I know you two are… together. But… I don’t know. I don’t understand.”

Namjoo seemed sympathetic. “You’ve been put in a difficult position.” she confessed. “I saw how much you felt hurt watching us at the show. I’m sorry.”

“I want to understand, but it doesn’t ever seem like the right time to talk about it with him.” 

Namjoo shrugged. “It’s hard being in our position.” she said. “In some ways. Before Jisoo and I got together, I had already done five marriage proposals before I graduated high school.” Mingyu blinked. “It was exhausting. I just wanted to work, you know? I can care less about being a wife or a mother.” She put her hands on her hips. “Jisoo’s the same way. He can care less about being a husband and a father. He has his own needs and wants. So… we’re kind of perfect for each other in that way.”

—-8 Years Prior— 

Abandoned by their mutual friend for some alcohol, Namjoo and Jisoo were plopped in two seats side by side at a table full of college students drinking and playing games across the table. Namjoo looked around before a drink was placed in front of her. When she looked over, Jisoo already had his arm behind her chair. “Wasn’t sure if you drink, so it’s non-alcoholic.”

Namjoo took the drink with a smile. “That’s perfect. I’m not much of a drinker.” She took a long sip while Jisoo took his own drink. “I take it you are?” 

“Only when I’m out like this.” He said. 

“Guess we’re learning a lot about one another tonight, hm?”

“Guess so.” Jisoo chuckled. The duo talked amongst themselves for a majority of the night, drowning out the table around them and the conversations they held. They caught up on their families dealings, Jisoo with less of a passionate excitement in his eye than Namjoo. They talked about school and classes, about themselves. During their conversations, it was clear of one thing: Jisoo was clearly hitting on Namjoo, making light small talk and slipping compliments over his drink. 

“Do you flirt with all the girls like this?” Namjoo asked curiously when she set down her second drink, alcoholic this time. Jisoo shrugged. 

“Only the pretty ones.”

“That’s corny,” she chuckled, watching how his grin widened a bit. A tap on her shoulder pulled her attention from Jisoo, their mutual friend, Suhye, already hungry for an update on the pair and how well they were hitting it off. She couldn’t blame the girls swooning in delight or simmering in jealousy. Jisoo was popular on campus for both his looks and his connections, a deadly weapon that allowed him to get with anybody he wanted. And it seemed, for better or worse, he chose Namjoo. She had to swat them all away, blush dusting her cheeks as she insisted that it wasn’t what it looked like. At least, not right now. But maybe. She wouldn’t say no. 

When Namjoo turned to playfully ask for another drink, she caught Jisoo’s focus on the guys on the other end of the table. They were shouting, cheering at what seemed to be two other guys guzzling down drinks in some type of reckless competition. But Jisoo wasn’t cheering or screaming, he was observing. And when Namjoo followed his gaze, saw he was observing one guy in particular who was already laughing behind his fourth beer. 

“Seungcheol, you’re gonna be so hungover for class tomorrow.”

Seungcheol set his drink down, cheeks flushed as he grinned. “I’ll be good, I’ll be fine.” he waved his hands lazily. When his eyes lolled to the side, they locked across the table at Jisoo and Namjoo. “Jisoo-yah, want in?” He passed the beer over. 

Namjoo’s eyes flickered to Jisoo, who waved them off, crossing one leg over the other. “No.” he assured. “I’m fine just… watching.”  

—---------

Jisoo walked Namjoo home that night and to her first class the following morning. He brought her coffee and a pastry on the way, his attempt at courting her for another date. It worked. He took her to an aquarium, to a nice dinner, to the movies. Typical dates. He was a gentleman, pulling out her chair, opening doors, and paying for everything. Every time, the entire time, his hand stayed on the small of her back, or he looped their arms together, something physical that showed everyone who stared that they were an item. 

Rumors spread like wildfire around campus regarding the pair's relationship status. Girls wondered if he dropped all of the other flings he was suspected to have, guys cried about not being able to talk to Namjoo anymore without Jisoo being right there. Every time they were asked Jisoo would tell them to mind their business before draping his arm over her shoulder. But Namjoo didn’t mind, really she didn’t. 

Namjoo looked up to Mingyu, a half-smile on her face. “The longer he and I stayed in this ‘talking stage’ the more I began noticing different things.” She inhaled. “For example, he didn’t kiss me. Ever.”

“Ever.” Mingyu echoed. He thought about all of the kisses the duo have shared. Namjoo nodded. 

“The aquarium.” I’m still a little nervous…

“The movies.” I want to take it slow.

“After every single dinner.” It wouldn’t be very gentlemanly to kiss someone so soon….

Namjoo watched as Jisoo scratched the back of his neck, eyebrows raised in amusement at the last one. “Jisoo-yah…” she breathed, taking a step closer. “We’ve already been on five dates.” she said. “Either we’re dating, or we’re not. I’m okay either way. I just want to know.”

“No, we are!” Jisoo’s eyes widened, a hand reaching out to grab her arm, curling into the fabric of her sweater. “I’m sorry. I haven’t ever done dating like this before…”

“I know.” She admitted. “Me either.” She saw how Jisoo looked her over, how his eyes shook. How nervous he was as he gently tugged her closer, leaning in and brushing their lips together. Namjoo could almost feel his hand fisting her sweater, shaking. There was no way those rumors about him sleeping with lots of girls were true if this was how he was acting with a little kiss. Namjoo pressed her hand to his bicep and returned the kiss just as gently. No open-mouths, or tight grips, just a very soft, very gentle kiss. 

When Jisoo pulled away, Namjoo felt a smile twitch into her lips. She looked down at her purse, gripping the handle. Just as she was about to make a comment, lightening the mood before it tightened too hard, a sharp breath was heard above her. She looked up, and Jisoo was avoiding her gaze. His hand covered his mouth, and he looked shocked. Stunned, almost disgusted. Namjoo blinked.

“Did… I’m sorry, was it bad?”

“What?” Jisoo looked at her, and his expression all but melted away. “No…” he shook his head. “No, fuck, I’m sorry Namjoo.” His voice was much softer now, less sure. Namjoo pursed her lips together. “I…” he sighed. “I should go. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay? I promise.”

“Okay.” She turned her head, watching as he started down the path towards his own dorm. Namjoo watched his back get smaller until he turned the corner and disappeared, before finally pressing a hand to her own lips. 

It wasn’t just the kissing at the end of dates, it was PDA. It was saved for the public eye only. Arms draped across her shoulder when they sat with friends, interlacing their fingers when they walked, the hand on the small of her back when he met her at class. Kisses on the cheek or the back of the hand, pet names that made Namjoo giggle. She indulged it each and every time, but could see the unsure waver in his eyes. 

When the pair were alone, it was different. It was quiet. No pet names, so lingering touches, no arms over the back of her chair. It was more like two friends hanging out in the same space than a couple that had been dating for, at that point, almost four months. But Namjoo never intruded, never encroached on his space. It didn’t feel right, not when Jisoo looked so far gone, like he was in another part of the house.

Namjoo only leaned over a little, creaking the couch cushion. “Oppa,” she said. His head whipped around like he forgot she was even there. “There you are.” she chuckled. Jisoo’s cheeks tinted red. “Are you alright? You look tired.”

“Yeah. I just… I zoned out. The movie is really bad,” he chuckled. 

“It is.” she giggled. Jisoo grabbed his remote, clicking the movie off. “We can do something else.” The duo shared a glance, before Jisoo slid the rest of the popcorn in the bowl towards her. She lifted it up with a soft thanks. 

Movie night somehow turned into one of those awkward group projects, both of them at Jisoo’s table with snacks from his chef and their school work laid out before them. It was Namjoo’s idea, because she couldn’t think of anything else. Jisoo wasn’t a physical touch guy from what she’d gathered, and it was late. Where could they possibly go? 

Namjoo was scratching through her sticker-covered design book when she heard the chair beside her move. Looking up, Jisoo had been staring. His hand was on his chin, and his eyes were locked on the book. “What are you working on?” He asked curiously. 

“I was actually working on some designs for my parents while I was waiting for you to finish class today. So I’m just cleaning them up a bit.”

Jisoo perked up. “Can I see?” Namjoo nodded, smiling as Jisoo leaned over. It was not enough to close even a fraction of the distance between them. Namjoo looked up, setting the book between them instead. She flipped it open, pointing out some of the most recent designs. She explained each and every one, her chest warm as she saw Jisoo’s eyes track each different picture. His hand reached down, brushing against a piece of fabric she’d ripped off and stapled into the book; light blue cotton with a white daisy print. 

“I think I’m going to use this and make a jumper,” she motioned to the straps that would go along the shoulders. 

“You’re so talented.” He said. “These look amazing.” He chuckled. “You can tell you come from a family of designers. And love what you do.”

Namjoo chuckled. “Thanks,” she said. “I hope my parents like them. It’s just been nice to have the time to work on these.” Her eyes fluttered up to him. Jisoo glanced up at her too and he smiled softly. “What about you?” Jisoo raised an eyebrow as Namjoo closed up her book, now putting all of her attention on him. “What are you working on?”

“Oh, uhm.” he looked down at the papers in front of him, shifting through them lazily. “I don’t know, honestly. My father gave them to me after class today and told me to read them and summarize them.” Namjoo smiled. “I think its profits and data from last quarter.” he rolled his eyes.

“Extra homework?”

“I guess.” Jisoo set his pencil down and leaned back in his chair. “I need to report back to him tomorrow after school.” 

“That stinks,” Namjoo said, lips curling into a smirk. Jisoo nodded, eyebrows raised slightly.

“It absolutely does,” he agreed. “But…. I gotta do it, so…” Namjoo nodded. For a minute, she saw a hint of truth in his eyes as they fell back to the paper before him. 

“Do you want to do it?”

Jisoo was silent for a minute. But he ultimately shrugged. “It’s whatever,” he said. Truth still lingered in his eyes, but it was duller than before.

Namjoo waited for a few moments before asking one more question. “Oppa,” she breathed, and Jisoo looked over. “....Do you want to kiss me?” 

His breath hitched, the fingers around the pencil curling so tightly Namjoo could see it crack a bit. After a long moment of silence, Jisoo swallowed. 

“...Yes,” he said softly.

So they did. But Namjoo could tell now that he was lying. 

“That must have been hard.” Mingyu breathed the words before he could think them, watching as Namjoo caught his gaze. She smiled, and Mingyu saw the lingering hurt in her eyes. He looked down at his food, which was ordered and served while Namjoo had been talking. But he didn’t touch it yet, he wouldn’t dare. 

“It was. I didn’t know what to do. My first thought was to dump him but… that didn’t feel right. I wasn’t mad at him, I wasn’t even unhappy. I was just so confused, it didn’t make sense.” She hummed. “But then I realized he wasn’t dating me for me. He wasn’t even dating me for himself.” Mingyu cocked his eyebrow as Namjoo continued speaking. “He was dating me for his father.”

Namjoo watched as the exotic meal was placed in front of her. Imported fish and tons of delicious side dishes. She and her parents had been invited to dinner at the Hong’s manor, to finally do what all couples do at the next stage of their relationship: meet the parents.

Jisoo seemed on edge most of the night, fiddling with his utensils during the meal and drinking a lot more water than the rest of them. But he was still smiling, and polite. He draped his arm over Namjoo’s chair when they waited for the food and chuckled sweetly at her when her mother commented that ‘they were the cutest couple’. 

Mr. Hong was first to speak, and Jisoo perked up like a dog. “I must say Jisoo, you’ve really found a lovely young woman.” 

“Ah.” Jisoo looked at Namjoo, who offered a soft smile in his direction before he spoke. “Thank you. She’s… I really like her.”

Mr. Hong chuckled. “I see that. Rumor is you can’t keep your hands off each other at school.” Namjoo felt her cheeks turn pink and she waved her hand.

“Sir, it’s not what you think–.”

“Aaah, don’t worry, I was young once too.” he laughed with Namjoo’s parents as they side tracked to conversation about their own college days. Namjoo felt the hand behind her head curl into the back of the chair, gripping it like it needed to break. She looked at Jisoo, who had his hand on his mouth, a finger drumming lightly against his cheek as he waited for the parents to be done. “Jisoo, elbow off the table.” His father snapped, and immediately his hand fell to his lap, his gaze still looking slightly to the right. 

Namjoo reached over, coaxing Jisoo’s hand from behind the chair and onto his leg, interlacing their hands. She could feel the split second where he wanted to pull away, but he didn’t. He only squeezed it tighter. 

“Well, Mr. and Mrs. Noh. Namjoo. I’m so glad you guys could come to dinner tonight. Should we move into the living room and have some tea and snacks before you go?”

Namjoo smiled at her mother as she buzzed with excitement, hosting her husband by his arm as the dishes around them were taken away. Mr. Hong turned to Namjoo and smiled. “Jisoo will meet you in the other room, okay, Namjoo.” 

“Yes, Sir.” Namjoo turned to Jisoo, who only nodded and motioned for her to follow her mother. So, she did, bowing politely before disappearing through the sliding glass doors dividing the rooms. Just before the doors closed entirely, she stopped them, standing just close enough to listen without being suspicious. 

“She’s nice.”

“...She is.” Jisoo finally spoke up.

“And she’s from a good family.”

“...Yes, she is,” Jisoo said again.

Mr. Hong was quiet for a moment, then finally said: “I didn’t think you had the… motivation to find your own partner, Jisoo.” he said. “I’m pleased to finally have one thing I don’t have to be disappointed in.”

Jisoo didn’t say anything that time, but his father did.

“But she seems smart. Has a good head on her shoulders. You picked a good one, Jisoo. Don’t ruin it.” 

Namjoo gripped the doorknob, stepping away when she heard the father and son move. Mr. Hong stepped out first, passing by without so much as another glance at Namjoo. Jisoo wasn’t far behind, and the duo locked eyes.

“Are you okay?” she asked. Jisoo only stepped closer, lacing their fingers together once again. When she looked down, she saw the hint of nail marks digging into his palm just as they locked together. When she glanced back up at Jisoo, his expression was unreadable. It was dark, like the night sky getting ready for a rain storm. It made Namjoo feel sick. But when he looked at her, she noticed a hint of brightness far and deep in his pupils, a hint of the stars desperate to come out from behind the clouds.

“...He said I picked a good one.” 

The drive back to the dorms was quiet, neither knowing what to say in the backseat of the car while his assistant at the time, Mr. Jeong, drove them. He kept his eyes on the road, not focused on the couple in the back at all. Maybe for his own sanity, not interested in what college students get up to when in such cramped quarters. But he didn’t have to worry about any of that.

Namjoo looked over at Jisoo, who kept his hands firmly in his lap. They were squeezed together, his thumb kneading the flesh of his other hand like it was bread dough. His eyes were locked out the window, the night sky overtaken by clouds as a storm raged behind them. 

“Your parents are nice.” Namjoo isn’t sure why she said it. Maybe to keep up the scene that Jisoo seemed stuck in. Jisoo finally looked at her and nodded. 

“Yours too,” he said. “Uh…” he rubbed his face, pulling out his phone and watching the light illuminate his side profile. “Sorry. I’m just so beat.”

Namjoo nodded. “Me too,” she said. 

The duo parted ways at the female dorms, Jisoo watching as she walked inside before starting on his own way. As Namjoo turned out to one of the windows, she saw him head in the complete opposite direction of the dorms. 

Things stayed pretty much the same after that. Namjoo just kind of went through the motions. Jisoo’s girlfriend by day, and Noh Namjoo by night. She went out with him from time to time, but it felt more like friends meeting up rather than going out together. Over time, as four months turned into five into six, and the end of the term was coming, Namjoo let it be. It would be what it was. She was Jisoo’s girlfriend for as long as she needed to be, and that was ok. It beat sitting through boring blind dates and listening to her mother remind her that she’s only fertile for so long at the ripe age of 19.

“...I was just as confused as you are now. I thought maybe he just didn’t want to get married, like me.” she said to Mingyu. “For a while. But when it clicked… it clicked.”

One afternoon, just as classes were letting out. She and Jisoo had plans to meet her parents for lunch before their afternoon classes, and she knew it would only be a matter of time before her driver arrived. So, she hurried through the male dorm hallways, waving to some friends of hers and Jisoo’s. She could see his dorm at the end of the hall, and she just hoped he wasn’t still deciding on what to wear.

When she got to the front door, she didn’t even bother to knock. She simply turned the door knob and stepped in, fixing her bag. “Oppa, I hope you’re ready, we’re going to be la-.” Namjoo looked up just as a thwack echoed through the room, followed by a pained: “Fuck, ow!” And it wasn’t Jisoo.

Namjoo’s eyes lifted to the scene before her, and her hand froze in her bag. She watched as Jisoo sat on the edge of his bed, shirt off and hair damp with hints of sweat. His jeans were unbuttoned and unzipped, and the cause of it was rubbing their hip just a few feet away.

Choi Seungcheol was standing there, looking up at her with wide, mortified eyes. His soccer jersey was wrinkled, tugged down to expose one shoulder with a very deep red mark against it. He was gasping for breath, his head turning to Jisoo for some sort of guidance. But Jisoo seemed just as stunned, if not more. 

“...Shit, sorry.” Seungcheol said, bowing profusely in Namjoo’s direction.” I’ll go, see you Jo- uh, Jisoo.” He barely looked back at Jisoo before scrambling out the door, fixing his jersey and disappearing down the hall. Namjoo followed him as he made a sharp turn into his own dorm room at the other end of the hall, closing and locking it. 

Namjoo was so stunned she could only formulate one thought in her head. 

Oh…

“...Namjoo…” The half-broken voice back in the room made her look over. Jisoo was standing up now, his shirt in his hand as he walked over, his jeans buttoned up. “Namjoo, please… it isn’t what it looks like.” Namjoo blinked, eyes falling to the shirt crumpled in his shaking fist. “Please let me explain…”

Something in Namjoo clicked then, and she felt a sense of…. Peace? She couldn’t tell. Something in her body broke into a million pieces and then rebuilt itself in a matter of seconds, she couldn’t possibly tell what it was. But when she saw Jisoo try to speak again, she stepped into the room and locked the door behind her.

“Sit,” she said softly. Jisoo blinked, turning to the desk Seungcheol had most likely bruised himself on. But he did it, sinking into the chair. She walked over, kneeling down in front of him. The duo stared at one another for a minute, a long minute. She could see the terror in Jisoo’s eyes, how he searched for the right words to say with every passing second. After a minute, she dug into her bag and pulled out her makeup kit. Jisoo watched as she unzipped it, pulling out concealer and a brush. “We’re meeting my parents for lunch soon, we gotta get this redness and puffiness down.” 

“What?” Jisoo studdered, flinching at the makeup brush as she got to work. “Namjoo, let me explain–.”

“And wear a different shirt.” She stopped her work on his almost tear-stricken face and smiled. “That one’s wrinkled, silly.”

That afternoon, they laughed and ate with her parents as if they were the ones tangled up together a few hours prior, that everything was good. And to Namjoo, things were. Things at least made more sense now.

Neither of them mentioned the events from that afternoon until they got home. Jisoo walked her back to the dorm, hands shoved deep into his pockets and eyes low to the ground. He didn’t look up at her until they got to the front of the female dorms. “Namjoo–.”

“I’m sorry you thought you couldn’t tell me.” She said softly. “It must have been so lonely for you.”

Jisoo stopped walking, and she turned to meet him. He was stunned into silence, so she stood and waited patiently for a response. 

That was the first time she’d ever seen Jisoo cry.

Namjoo shifted in her spot. Their time was running out now, eventually they had to head back to the office. At this rate they were gone longer than Joshua and him were at the banquet. But he couldn’t stop staring at Namjoo as she spoke. Each word hit his chest like she’d just unloaded a round of bullets into it. 

“Did his father know then?” Mingyu asked. He wasn’t even sure if he knew now. Namjoo shrugged. 

“I don’t know. He never told me. I… have a feeling both of them were in denial about a lot of things then. Jisoo was more eager to please then.” She turned back down to where the party was, to where Jisoo was still putting on airs and humoring those he wants no business with. “He still is.” 

“So…” Mingyu swallowed hard. “That’s why you two are still… together.”

“Mm.” she nodded. “We agreed it would be that way for as long as Jisoo needed. A month, a year, ten years. Marriage is expected of people like us, to people like us.” she said. “I’d much rather be married to someone I love than some jerk I was set up with.”

“So you do love him.” Mingyu wanted to die.

“I do.” she admitted. “But not in the way you think. I did once, but I think now it’s more of a best friend's love.” she smiled sweetly. “That’s why I suggested this. Because I knew that this way, I could focus on my career while he… figured himself out.” she shrugged. “And I could protect him.” She chuckled. “He is Hong Jisoo after all. He does what he wants.”

Mingyu smiled a bit. “Yes, he has said that before.” He mused. 

A brief giggle and then Namjoo’s smile fell. Something in her eyes darkened. Mingyu felt a shiver go up his spine. Oh. Now he was going to die. After the monologue. It made sense. Mingyu gulped, rubbing his hands together as she spoke. “Kim Mingyu.”

“Yes?” he closed his eyes when a mouse-like squeak of a word came out of his mouth.

“It’s your job to protect Hong Jisoo.” Mingyu nodded. “But it’s my job to protect Joshua Hong.” The name coming from her lips felt foreign, but she was genuine when she said it. “If you want that title for yourself, you have to earn it. I have seen Jisoo at some of his lowest moments.” 

“This isn’t fair! Why was it so easy for him? Did he not care about me at all?!” 

“I don’t know. I’m sorry.” Namjoo whispered, hugging him as he sobbed into her chest, broken and shaking for hours in a trashed bedroom.

“Do you understand?” she asked. “He has so many things that he needs to figure out, and you’ve been the one who’s going to see him through it. As his bodyguard or….” she trailed off.

“I understand…” he said softly. In reality, he didn’t. Few things made sense, maybe even fewer than they did before. But… hearing it from Namjoo, that she, too, wanted what was best for Joshua, was enough to put him at ease. Enough to let him know that he wasn’t the only one watching Joshua hurt in the shadows, having to stand by while he suffered alone. “I want to work together to make sure he’s happy…”

Namjoo smiled softly then, nodding her head. “Good,” she said. “I’m going to hold you to it.” Mingyu nodded his head. Finally, Namjoo reached for her fork. “Please, eat. Before it gets any colder.” 

Mingyu turned his gaze to his food once again, reaching for his fork. As he ate, he tried his best to make sure that the scattered puzzle in his head would be put together before he got back to work, because he needed to see Joshua. He needed to talk to him, to hold him, to tell him everything would be ok.

To protect him. 

—------------

Mingyu and Namjoo could hear Mr. Hong and Jisoo bickering from across the hall when they returned.

“I have no idea what she’s doing, okay? I don’t own her, you know!”

“Well, she'd better have a damn good reason for this. Did he do something at the show?”

“No, not that I know of! If he did, she would have told me! As I said, I don’t fucking-.”

“Don’t curse at your father.” 

“Stay the hell out of this, Jiwon, please.” Mingyu frowned when he heard Jisoo’s exhaustion. He must have been fighting these two the entire time they were gone. 

“They’re at it again, hm?” Namjoo sighed. “Don’t worry, I’ll do all the talking, ok?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Mingyu nodded, watching as she took the lead into the office. 

All three members of the Hong family almost jumped out of their seats when Mr. Park let Namjoo and Mingyu in. Mingyu’s eyes immediately fell to Jisoo, who sat down in his own seat and studied the pair. Namjoo bowed politely.

“Miss. Noh.” Mr. Hong hummed. “I hope lunch was satisfactory.” 

“It was delicious.” She said. “I appreciate you humoring me and my request today.”

“Of course, my dear.” Mr. Hong hummed. “But, if I may… why did you request to see Kim Mingyu today? Did something happen that I should be aware of?”

Mingyu looked at Namjoo, studying her profile as she smoothed out her jacket. Namjoo shook her head. “No, Sir. Quite the opposite, I simply took a liking to him at the fashion show. And I know that he’s been with Oppa for quite a little bit of time now. I had to check him out for myself.” 

Mr. Hong raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry?”

“Well, pardon my boldness, but we can’t have just anyone guarding my Oppa, can we? As his future wife, it’s my job to make sure the people close to him are going to take good care of him.” She turned to face Mingyu. 

Mr. Hong glanced at Jisoo, then back to Namjoo and Mingyu. “And?”

“And he seems to be doing a fantastic job,” Namjoo assured. Mingyu looked over at Jisoo, seeing the heir’s shoulders relax a bit. He licked his bottom lip, turning his gaze away from the pair and looking out the window. 

Mingyu nodded to Namjoo. “You’re too kind. Miss. Noh.” He said softly. 

Namjoo smiled sweetly, patting his shoulder. “Oppa!” she called, reclaiming his attention. “I need to go back now. Walk me out?” 

“Uh… yeah, sure.” Rising from his seat, he bowed to his father before passing by Mingyu. Mingyu looked down, noticing how Joshua brushed lightly against his shoulder, before taking Namjoo by the arm. 

The group of four now, bodyguards and their boss’s, strolled to the elevator, Namjoo and Joshua leading the way. Nobody spoke, but Mingyu silently watched as Namjoo’s hold on his arm loosened to a gentle palm pressed against his shoulder, and how Jisoo silently looked ahead as they walked. It seemed nobody had anything to say right now, but it was a comfortable silence compared to the ones he’d found himself in recently. 

—------------------------

The car ride that night, without Junhui, was void of talking, but not quiet. Joshua had turned the music on and was staring out the window, the occasional hum coming from his lips. Mingyu was driving him home, his grip enough to strangle a large bear if necessary. He could almost see his bones in his knuckles from how hard he was gripping the wheel. 

There was no tension in the car, but that arguably was the worst part. Every time Mingyu snuck a glance at Joshua, his eyes remained fixed through the glass, staring ahead at the world as it passed by. He didn’t know what that meant after today’s events.

It’s my job to protect Joshua Hong. If you want that job, you have to prove to me you really want it. 

“Sir.” Mingyu managed to choke out. It was nonexistent at best, shaky at worst. 

Joshua’s shoulders tensed, almost startled. Like pulling the needle off the record, his humming stopped. Mingyu watched from the corner of his eye as Joshua glanced at the clock on the car’s radio. 

“...Off the clock.” His voice was flat, not littered with his usual coyness.

“Hyung.” 

“Mmm?”

“I just… am gonna talk. And you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to…” When he wasn’t met with a reply, Mingyu pulled to a stop at the next light. Taking a deep breath. “We aren’t… at the same place we started when we met at the festival, are we?”

Joshua didn’t reply.

Mingyu pulled forward as the light changed. “And I don’t… we don’t… know a lot about each other either.”

No reply. Was he still mad? Even after today he couldn’t blame him. The last time they two exchanged words they were raised and aggressive, so he wouldn’t blame Joshua. Mingyu realizes he gave Joshua the space to say nothing, but now that it was happening, he could feel his blood pressure spiking. 

“I… If we’re going to keep doing this… whatever we’ve created for ourselves here, then we should, erm… what’s the right word?” Mingyu paused, chewing on his bottom lip. “Communicate.”

“Mm.” Well, that’s something. 

Mingyu inhaled, finally turning to Joshua when they got to another red light. He glanced down and, in a bold move, reached out to take one of Joshua’s hands. The older man looked down with wide eyes, but didn’t attempt to pull away. “But I realize you might not have ever really expected this relation…” he paused. “This… to be that. We never really set down any ground rules, other than mine…” Still, Joshua’s eyes are trained on their hands sitting interlocked on his thigh. “I want you to feel comfortable communicating with me, but if you don’t… I understand.” 

“...It’s not that…” Joshua said softly.

Mingyu was now the one to fall silent, fixing his other hand on the wheel so that he could keep holding Joshua’s. He drove silently for a few seconds, but eventually said. “You said back at the office… I think it was… ‘We’re not boyfriends…” or something like that….” His cheeks heated up at the thought, and he felt Joshua’s fingers tighten on his hand. “Do you…. Would you not consider us to be… at that level?” 

Joshua was silent again. Mingyu bit into his lower lip. The duo drove for a few more minutes, Joshua's gaze returning to the window and Mingyu’s to the road. It was silent again, minus the music and the occasional hum of a note from Joshua. So, when he suddenly said, “Pull over,” and pointed to an open lot just a few blocks from Joshua’s house, Mingyu had to admit he was startled. But he listened. 

Mingyu parked in a random spot and put the car into park, turning off the ignition and listening to the car as it settled. Now it was his turn to glance out the window, eyes flickering up to the moon hanging in the air. 

The sound of shifting in the other seat made Mingyu look up, just in time to see Joshua unbuckling his seatbelt and crawling over the center console. Joshua straddled his lap. He looked up, holding Joshua so he wouldn’t fall. “What are you doing?” Mingyu’s question was intercepted by Joshua leaning down, brushing their lips together just enough for them to feel it. Mingyu inhaled, tilting his chin up to return it. His hands settled at Joshua’s lower back, while Joshua’s hands wormed their way up to Mingyu’s jaw line. 

The kiss wasn’t as intense as others they’ve had; neither was trying to paw away their clothes or whisper dirty things to one another. The windows didn’t steam, and the immediate vicinity didn’t feel hot. Things felt slow, uncharacteristically slow. But nice… oh, so nice. 

Joshua was the first to pull away, his tongue peeking out to swipe at his lips. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Mingyu tilted his head, their noses and lips knocking together. “You don’t have to be sorry,” he said. “I said terrible things, almost did terrible things. Probably because I was jealous. And I don’t understand a lot.” A smile formed on his lips, soft and attempting to be playful. “My brain hates when it doesn’t know things, you know? It comes with the ‘incredibly smart’ part of my DNA.” 

“Heh…” Joshua’s fingers flexed against Mingyu’s skin, and he felt the sudden urge to turn and kiss one; the base of his ring and pinkie fingers specifically. He leaned in, their lips brushing together again. Joshua seemed to be on a world limit for now. 

Mingyu rested their foreheads together. “I just want to be able to protect you.”

“It’s your job.” Joshua finally spoke. 

“More than my job,” Mingyu assured. “I want to protect you.” He thought back to Namjoo’s conversation with him and the determination in her statements. “Kim Mingyu wants to protect Joshua Hong.” His fingers curled around his waist, eyes fluttering shut as he inhaled, taking a moment to feel Joshua’s fingers on his skin. “From everything on and off the clock.” Joshua pulled back a bit, resting his back against the wheel. Mingyu still held him. “You said I don’t understand you or your life. Which is true, I’ve only been in it for a short time. But I want to. And I want to be more honest with you, too.”

Joshua ran one of his hands down the side of Mingyu’s neck. “You won’t like a lot of things you learn about me…” he said softly. “I’m shocked you’ve stuck around this long.” Mingyu opened his mouth to talk, but Joshua’s head fell forward, pressing his forehead on Mingyu’s shoulder. “From the fashion show to the sneaking around… to the gala… to everything…” 

Mingyu frowned. Gently, he lifted Joshua’s head, nudging their noses together once more. None of those things felt like they mattered anymore. “Try me…” he said softly. “Whatever you tell me, right now, will be fair game. No judgement, no grudges, nothing.” Joshua was silent for a minute, really trying to come up with something to say. Mingyu waited patiently, watching Joshua tug at every thought and confession in his brain, wondering which would be the best one to start with. The more time passed, the tighter Mingyu’s chest felt. Was there actually something he wanted to get off his chest so badly it made him this nervous? 

“I’ve never had a boyfriend before…”

“Really…” Mingyu’s voice was soft despite the surprise. 

“Mm… I’ve been involved with lots of guys…. But none of them ever called me their boyfriend. So I never called them mine….” He rubbed his thumb along his lips. “I know how to be a boyfriend, if you count Namjoo…. But I don’t know how to… have a boyfriend.”

Mingyu’s lips fell into a small smile. “Well…  you brought me food from my favorite restaurant that one time. That’s a good start.” Joshua finally allowed a small chuckle to escape his lips. 

“...The CEO of this transportation company, Mr. Taylor….” Joshua said gently. “He has a husband.” 

“Oh?” 

“Mm…” Joshua’s hands tightened on Mingyu’s shoulders, and when he felt one of them shaking, his hand slipped up to intertwine them. “He told me very casually that they had lunch plans. Like it wasn’t a big deal.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t.”

“I think I forgot how to function for fifteen minutes after that phone call. It was… I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone in… power, I guess, flaunt having a partner - a husband - so easily before.” Mingyu nodded. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to meet with him. I might have to give it to my father.”

“Now, that’s stupid,” Mingyu said quickly, eyes widening. Joshua pouted. “You have much more in common with this guy than your father does. If you play your cards right, you might just make a really strong ally for yourself in the future, you know. Even beyond the merger…” 

Joshua clicked his tongue. “He’s going to ask me about Namjoo, I just know it.”

“You’ll be able to maneuver your way through.” Mingyu encouraged, rubbing Joshua’s sides. “You’re the best liar I’ve ever met.”

Joshua laughed, drier this time. “You have no idea, Mingyu….” He said softly. 

Smiling, Mingyu finally looked over to check the time on the clock. “How far away is your house from here?” 

“Mmm… maybe five minutes.” His hand gently squeezed the side of Mingyu’s neck. “Why? Gonna make me walk home?”

“No.” Mingyu chuckled. “I’m going to take you home.” After a second, he tilted his head, digging his teeth into his bottom lip. “But, once you get home and I’m off the clock… I can’t really say what you’ll do after…”

Joshua blinked, a soft smile forming on his face, his hand slipping down to toy with Mingyu’s shirt. In his curiosity, one of the buttons came undone. “Ahh, like… walking back over here and getting in some strange man’s car, hm?” He chuckled. “I never expected you to start enabling me, Kim Mingyu…”

Mingyu sighed, a playful sound of defeat, body falling limp against the headrest. “I’ve been enabling you since I first asked you to come up to my apartment for coffee.”

“Which I never even got.”

“My coffee machine sucks.”

“I know.” Joshua grinned, leaning in to kiss Mingyu again. Mingyu tilted his chin to meet him, this kiss holding much more weight of future events than the past one. When they pulled for air, Mingyu’s hands were still holding Joshua close to him. He reached up, brushing some of his hair from Joshua’s bangs until he finally peeled himself off Mingyu’s lap and settled back into the passenger’s seat. The first thing he did was put the music back on.

Mingyu started up the engine, the car pulling seamlessly out of the driveway and back onto the road towards Joshua’s house. 

--------------

“Okay, there’s something seriously wrong with you, Hyung!”

Mingyu rolled on his stomach, propping himself up on his arms to look down at Joshua, who had been staring wide-eyed at him. “What do you mean, something is wrong with me?”

“Business Proposal is the best drama.”

“Uh, no. It’s good, don’t get me wrong, but Boys Over Flowers is so much more iconic!” 

“You’re just saying that because the main guy is Lee Minho!”

“And Lee Minho being a gay awakening for 14-year-old me was incredibly impactful on society. Therefore, the best drama ever.” Mingyu scoffed. “What? I know Ahn Hyoseop is the reason you picked yours!” 

“Actually, it’s the comedic timing and the storyline, let’s be serious, okay?” Mingyu narrowed his eyes. Joshua cocked an eyebrow, and Mingyu immediately folded. “Okay, yeah, also Ahn Hyoseop.” Joshua laughed, bright and amused as he lay back on the bed, stretching his arms over his head. “Okay, fine, next question.” Mingyu shifted, pursing his lips together. “Mmmm, dream vacation.” 

“Oh, that’s easy,” Joshua said. “Los Angeles.”

Mingyu whistled. “That sounds amazing.” He said. “But I assumed with your money, you’d have answered that you’ve been practically everywhere.” Joshua chuckled, but it wasn’t as bright or amused as the others had been. Mingyu watched as Joshua lay on his back, pursing his lips together.

“My father won’t let me go to the States,” he said. “And before you say anything, I know I’m in my twenties and can do what I want…” he chuckled dryly. “But my father doesn’t let me have access to my passport….” 

“Seriously?” Joshua shook his head. “Oh…”

“He only gives it to me when he approves of the trip,” he shifted. “So the States are out. Hence, a dream…”

“Wow.” Mingyu reached out, wiping some of Joshua’s bangs from his face. He looked over, the corner of his lip peeking up into a small smile. “Is that because of all the stuff with your mother?” 

“Yeah. Not like I’d have any luck finding her anyway…” He clicked his tongue. “What about you?” Mingyu hummed at the question. “Dream vacation.”

“Oh. Uh… Hawaii.” He chuckled. “But hell, going to Jeju is a big deal for me at this rate.” Joshua hummed, nodding his head. 

“Just say the word, and I can take us to Jeju.” His voice was soft. Mingyu felt something bloom in his chest, and his fingers continued raking gently through his hair, still slightly damp from sweat. “Okay, ask another one.”

“It’s your turn.”

“I like it when you ask,” Joshua said between soft breaths. Mingyu hummed, racking his brain for a good question. “Don’t hurt yourself, there.” Joshua teased. Mingyu scoffed, the hand playing through Joshua’s hair slipping under his head instead. He watched as Joshua rolled onto his side, and his cheek rested comfortably against Mingyu’s bicep. 

“I don’t have any more fun ones in mind.” Mingyu’s voice was quiet. Joshua shifted, his bangs once again dangling in his face as he moved.

Joshua's expression tightened a bit. “I’m amazed you took this long to ask a serious one…” he said. “Go on. Ask away.”

Mingyu took a deep breath, the hand under Joshua’s head lifting up a bit to thread back into his hair, like a lifeline to remind him Joshua was here with him for now. “Did you have feelings for her?” He swallowed. “Ever?”

Joshua blinked. “....Namjoo?” Mingyu nodded his head. But just before he could beg for an apology or switch the question to pineapple on pizza, Joshua answered. “Yeah. I did. I think…” 

“You think?” 

“Yeah.” Joshua scooted closer to them, their chests now pressed together. “I mean… when I was in college, I did. Or I told myself I did.” He pursed his lips together. “I guess I have to have some feelings for her to do everything she and I do, but…” realizing he was rambling, Joshua stopped. “Why?”

“Well.” Mingyu’s eyes looked Joshua over, letting his head fall forward so their foreheads were pressed together. “You touch her like you do. I saw.”

“Jealous?” he asked, his voice soft. Mingyu’s cheeks tinted pink. “I don’t think anyone I’ve been with has ever been jealous of Namjoo before,” he said. “It’s going to boost her ego.” Mingyu smiled. “But it’s all just for show. I promise. So don’t worry…”

“Well… that’s easier said than done.”

“Oh? And why’s that?” 

“...Because I touch you the same way.” 

Joshua was quiet after that, wide brown eyes snapping up to Mingyu’s gaze. Joshua propped himself up fully, looking down at Mingyu like he was trying to translate what he just heard. Mingyu glanced up at him, biting the inside of his lip. Finally, Joshua spoke. “...Show me.” Mingyu’s heart stopped in his chest then, shoulders tightening. “What? I want to see.” 

Mingyu felt his heart start beating as he sat up, coming eye level with Joshua. In a few swift moves, he reached out and tugged him close by his waist, so Joshua was straddling his waist. Only the blanket was covering them at the hips, and Mingyu could feel Joshua’s body heat wrap around him like a blanket as he sat completely naked on his lap. “Well…” Mingyu was already breathless as he looked up at Joshua, his hands looping around his waist. “Like this.” His hand slid along Joshua’s skin, ghosting over the small of his back. He saw goosebumps as they poked up on Joshua’s skin, his head lolling to the side. The other hand slid up, along his arm, interlacing their fingers. “And this.” Joshua chuckled, running his tongue along his bottom lip as he watched Mingyu move along his body. Mingyu rubbed his hands along Joshua’s arms, brushed his fingers along his cheeks as if he were catching an eyelash, and ran a hand gently through his hair. Every movement, he watched Joshua’s eyes follow like a hawk.

“That’s all?” he asked, his voice already oozing with a soft intrigue. Mingyu’s eyes fluttered down to his lips, shaking his head.

“No,” he said, before the hand on his back slid up. He watched Joshua shiver under the touch before Mingyu gently pulled him forward and into a kiss. Joshua's hands reached up, cupping at his jaw as he returned the kiss, pressing his body closer to Mingyu’s. Mingyu hummed, fisting the sheets falling off Joshua’s hips and tugging them up. “Does that make sense?” he asked between kisses, smiling up at Joshua. 

Joshua nodded his head. “So much sense,” he said breathlessly, before kissing Mingyu so hard that it sent them both toppling backwards onto the bed again. 

—------------

Jisoo stepped out of the back of the car, fixing the suit of his jacket as he looked up at the gorgeous Korean restaurant he’d booked for his meeting with Mr. Taylor. The CEO had managed to extend his vacation, starting for a week in Korea before flying out to Japan. Jisoo’s team told him that was a good sign, but Jisoo would never tell them he was still a bit nervous.

He told Mingyu, though. It was all he told Mingyu.

Jisoo let out a deep breath, turning to the door of the car. Mingyu stepped out from the passenger’s seat, offering a small smile of encouragement. Jisoo nodded his head, heading up the steps. 

Mr. Taylor arrived five minutes after Jisoo had settled into their private room, their drinks already poured and appetizers already ordered. Mr. Taylor was beaming as the pair shook hands.

“Jisoo, it’s been too long.”

“Same to you.” he said. “I really appreciate you finding the time to extend your vacation just for me.”

“Psh, please. My husband has always wanted to visit Korea.” Jisoo bit the inside of his lip as the pair sat down. Mr. Taylor was already pulling out his phone, showing Jisoo a picture of Mr. Taylor and his husband wearing traditional hanbok at a shrine. “He’s already dragged me around half the country.”

Jisoo chuckled a bit, admiring the smiling couple in the photo. “Well, if you need recommendations while you’re here, let me know. I’d be happy to give some.” 

Mr. Taylor laughed. “I will absolutely be taking you up on that.” He said. Jisoo nodded his head. As Mr. Taylor took a moment to sip his drink and scan the menu, Jisoo looked down at his lap. He thought back to his own phone gallery, littered with pictures of him and Namjoo from different events, arm in arm for the cameras or cuddling close for a selfie with friends. 

I touch you the same way.

Joshua’s entire body felt warm, like Mingyu’s hands were lingering on his waist, his back, his arms. He smiled to himself, looking up just as Mr. Taylor set his menu down.

“So… shall we talk business? I’m looking forward to hearing everything you have to offer to me.” 

Joshua nodded his head. “Absolutely.”

“Oppa, this is my friend, Noh Namjoo! You know her, right?” 

“...Yes…” 

The flash of a camera in his eyes brought him face to face with the large, white runway. The Noh family logo was projected from above through lights, dancing around the empty space. Jisoo fixed his jacket, turning to the seat beside him as it scratched against the floor. Namjoo smoothed out her dress and caught his eye, smiling sweetly. He offered one back, though the lips only lifted at one corner and barely reached his nose, much less his eyes. But he still draped his arm over the back of her chair and leaned in close. He had to; the flash of the cameras around them loved that. 

Namjoo got the message as well, leaning in just as close. He could feel her breath; she smelled like mint. “So,” she kept her voice low, batting her eyelashes up at Jisoo. “He’s cute.” Jisoo seemed confused, eyebrows furrowing as he leaned closer. “Mingyu?”

Jisoo’s breath hitched, turning his gaze away. “Why? Interested?” He asked. Namjoo laughed. 

“Jealous?” She asked. Jisoo looked over at her again, pouting.

“It’s… not like that.” 

“Oh no?” she asked. “I saw how you immediately turned to him after you kissed me,” she smiled. 

“He’s my bodyguard, he's supposed to protect me.”

“From me?” Namjoo feigned offense. Jisoo’s eyes flickered in her direction. A pause sat between them. “I’m going to go talk to him.” 

Jisoo’s eyes widened, jolting out of his seat as Namjoo got up and took two steps forward. “Wait!” He gripped her wrist, making her look over. He frowned, gently tugging her back to his side. “Jeez. What are you trying to prove?”

“That I’m right. That’s all.” 

“We really need to find you a boyfriend.” Jisoo huffed, kicking one leg over the other. “Or a cat. Something” 

“A cat sounds nice.” Namjoo hummed, finally getting a chuckle from Jisoo. She knocked their shoulders together, resting against it momentarily. Jisoo looked over, their foreheads almost brushing together. He closed his eyes and inhaled when he heard the sound of curious cameras going off nearby, one of them certainly pointed at them. “Are you okay?” He could hear the soft concern in his voice. 

“Mmm?” he cracked an eye open. Namjoo’s brown eyes flickered to the camera sounds behind them. “Ah. Yeah. I’m fine.” Finally pulling back, Jisoo fixed his coat jacket. He turned his head, looking over the cameras and towards the bodyguards. Mingyu, Minghao, and Chan were standing nearby, just within reach should they need to sprint into action. Jisoo could see people looking Mingyu’s way, guests whispering about the handsome new bodyguard. Some recognized him from the news, others just enjoyed marveling at him. Jisoo did too, doing a full sweep of his suit and how his hair curled a bit at the ends. But it wasn’t just his looks he was analyzing, it was his expression.

Mingyu’s eyes hadn’t relaxed since they walked into the room, falling to every corner of the large event space for a handful of seconds before moving again. Some would call it dutiful, but Jisoo could tell it wasn’t just that. When Mingyu, out of options, finally landed back on Jisoo and Namjoo, he felt himself perking up a bit. But Mingyu’s eyes widened. Without a word, he went back to ping ponging his gaze anywhere else. Jisoo’s chest constricted, but he loosened it with a strangled huff. 

“What the hell…” he murmured. Namjoo turned her head, and Jisoo watched her studying Mingyu just as intensely. “Seriously, are you interested?” He asked, a little harder this time. 

“No. But at this rate ,my parents might recruit him as a model.” Namjoo teased. She settled back in her seat, digging in her purse for some lip gloss. She applied it carefully, and her attention was momentarily taken by another guest who came to say hello. She got up, and Jisoo stumbled to her side. After his shaky greeting, he turned back to look at Mingyu. 

He was tapping Chan on the shoulder, whispering in his ear before disappearing into the back of the venue. 

“Just make sure you’re careful.”

Jisoo’s gaze snapped to Namjoo, her hand gentle on his bicep as she sat them both down. “I am.” he bit his lip when his voice wavered. “We are…” Namjoo seemed satisfied by that, leaning into him again as his arm locked around her seat. He hummed, running a hand through his hair. “...Did I really look right at him after?”

“Immediately.” Namjoo smiled. “It was cute. I saw how he was looking at you when you all walked in, too.”

Jisoo perked up. “And how was that?” he asked, only witnessing Namjoo’s teasing grin. But before any more curious questions were answered, the lights in the room dimmed, minus illuminating the runway. Jisoo sighed, resting back against the chair and allowing the music to fill his mind instead of the thoughts that were clogging it up.

---------------

The afterparty was just as extravagant as the runway show. Everywhere Mingyu looked, he saw models, socialites, influencers, fashion staples, and even idols that represented the brand - including a member of 4tune8, he needed to try and get an autograph for Seungkwan. The entire event was similar to the banquet, rich people eating and chatting as music played around them. More money in one piece of jewelry than Mingyu could ever imagine seeing in a paycheck in his life. 

He, Minghao and Chan were tasked with staying nearby. Not on top of Namjoo or Jisoo, but close enough. Which was fine, because every time Mingyu looks at Jisoo, his heart feels like it wants to explode out of his chest. Watching Jisoo put his hand on her waist, brush her hair back, and smile while their friends swoon at the ‘happy couple’.

Each thing Mingyu watched Jisoo do he thought back to when he did the same to Jisoo. He wondered how they could be so similar yet vastly different, how Jisoo could put on his act so seamlessly only to scowl at it in the shadows. He almost prayed Jisoo wouldn't sneak off with him this time because he didn’t think he could handle it. 

Chan bumped Mingyu with his shoulder, bringing him back to the present just as Jisoo accepted an appetizer from Namjoo to the playful teasing of their friends, smiling as he covered his mouth to avoid spilling crumbs. He looked so cute, too. This sucked. Mingyu almost wished he were guarding the door like he used to. 

“Namjoo, wait-.”

Mingyu looked up at the group of rich twenty-somethings nearby, Namjoo at the center. But his eyes weren’t focused on her; they dropped straight to Jisoo. He was holding her arm, hand in the pocket of his slacks as he whispered something to her. Despite the clear pleading look on his face, she was grinning widely, and pointing directly at…. Mingyu.

Oh shit.

He couldn’t tell what Namjoo was saying, but he was trying his best to decipher it. She was explaining something to the rest of the group they’ve assembled, smiling ear to ear while Jisoo rubbed the bridge of his nose in annoyance. What on earth could they possibly be talking about…. Oh.

They pointed to the ankle Jisoo twisted, and he offered a half-hearted nod. They’re talking about the banquet and the news. Namjoo must be explaining, like some sort of news anchor. He managed a broken, nervous smile at her, nodding his head. When he looked up, she was still staring, and there was a sharp look in her eye. Mingyu wanted to disappear. 

It wasn’t until Namjoo and her friends had made a group trip to the bathroom that Jisoo had enough free time to approach Mingyu. He looked up from the other guards around him, watching the black-haired heir motion Mingyu forward with his hand. Fuck.

Mingyu slinked forward, hands dutifully behind his back. “Yes Sir?” he asked, voice low. His eyes flickered over to Jisoo’s. They were hard, guarded, nervous, it was clear in how much darker the pupils looked even under the light. But after one second of the pair making eye contact, some of that darkness loosened. “Don’t let Namjoo get to you.”

“What?” Mingyu raised an eyebrow. 

“I said, don’t let her get to you. She’s trying to get on my nerves. I can tell she’s getting in your head.” 

“I- she- but you-.”

Jisoo turned abruptly at a familiar sound coming back into the room. “I need to go back.” he looked at Mingyu. “We’ll talk more in the car later.” And before Mingyu could refute his request, Jisoo was back at Namjoo’s side, his arm hugging her waist. Namjoo smiled at him, before her eyes fell back in Mingyu’s direction. Joshua swatted at her playfully before motioning her towards the table for something to eat. 

As Mingyu stood back, watching the pair, he wondered who Jisoo was trying to convince just then about ‘getting in their head’. Mingyu had never been more sure of anything in his life. That he’d wound up making the biggest mistake of his life. 

--------------------

The weekend came and went without so much as a text to Joshua’s phone, which had become less and less frequent since his situationship with Mingyu started up. The entire weekend, he lounged in his room, thinking about the younger’s furrowed eyebrows and shaking pupils, how he could barely look Joshua in the eye that entire night.

The duo didn’t even end up talking on the car ride home. It was suffocatingly quiet the entire ride, and the same suffocating silence seemed to cling to Joshua the entire weekend. He didn’t sleep a wink. 

Monday morning, fueled by a coffee brought by Junhui and with his sunglasses perched on his nose, he tried to push away his exhaustion before arriving at the office. The last thing he needed was an earful this early in the morning. 

Junhui led him up to his father’s office, past the sea of employees, stopping what they were doing and bowing in his direction. He offered a few quick glances in their direction, sipping his drink as he made a beeline for the elevator. Mingyu pressed the button up for him, and Jisoo’s eyes flickered in his direction. He caught it, those round puppy eyes falling in the heir's direction. But when Jisoo offered a flicker of a smile, Mingyu simply nodded his head and turned away.

Jisoo clicked his tongue, sipping his coffee. Mingyu’s been in a mood.

With not nearly enough time between the elevator ride to his father’s office to worry about it, Jisoo simmered in his annoyance up until he reached the large doors. He knocked, and a few moments later, was led inside. 

“You wanted to see me?” Jisoo asked. His father looked up from his computer.

“Yes. About two hours ago, why are you just arriving now?”

“I overslept,” Jisoo said simply. “Besides, I had a light day today, does it matter?”

“Punctuality does matter, in fact. It’s professional.” Jisoo rolled his eyes, watching his father approach him from behind his desk. “Especially when your division is starting to fall behind in their work results. Our last meeting showed international interest is down 15 percent since you started taking over.” 

“...Father, it’s barely the start of the new quarter. Why are you already looking at data?”

“You being the head of our International Relations gets a lot of eyes and ears on us. People expect great things in a short time, and so far we’ve had nothing to give them. I expect that to be rectified immediately.”

Jisoo sighed, putting his hand on his hip. “My crew is doing just fine. I think we’ll hit whatever you need us to hit by the end of the quarter to be satisfied.”

His father didn’t seem convinced. “I expect more than just that you ‘think’ you will.” Turning on his heel, he motioned to Mr. Park. “Remember that Bullet Transportation? You met while in London a few times.” He asked. Jisoo nodded, watching as a stack of paper was handed to Junhui. “He’s one of the big mergers in the West we can’t lose. I want that deal sealed by the end of the week.”

“Week? That’s insane! I need more time than that.”

“Well, you would have had at least a few hours if you were here on time this morning.” Jisoo’s mouth fell open, scoffing in surprise. “You may go.” 

Jisoo huffed, nodding his head before booking it out of the office. 

“Can you believe him?” Jisoo asked, looking at Junhui. His assistant offered an apologetic smile. “Right, I really shouldn’t be shocked.” He looked down at his watch, seeing that it was just pushing into lunchtime. “Well, let’s catch them before they scurry off to lunch, shall we?” And with a sharp right, the group was off to the International Division Branch. 

–-----------

Jisoo could hear chatter as he walked down the hallway. Two heads of bushy black hair were poking through the rows of computers. He fixed his tie, taking his glasses off his face and pressing them into Junhui’s hand without missing a step in his pace.

“Hold these.” 

By the time he approached the group, Yugeom was already up and out of his seat, motioning for the others to follow suit. “Good afternoon, Sir,” he said as he fell into a bow. Joshua put his hand in his suit jacket. He could see Mingyu standing just at the corner of the hallway, hands in front of him, and eyes looking around. 

“You all look relaxed. Is the day’s work done?”

“We were just about to go on a lunch break.” Another worker, Minji, said. “Care to join us, Sir?”

Jisoo’s lips curled in a small smile. “Uh, no,” he said simply. “Even if I wanted to, I can’t. My father has set a strict deadline on this merger with Bullet Transportation in London. And since my English is the best of ours, I’ll be fronting a majority of the conversations.” He glanced at the clock just above Mingyu’s head, eyes falling to his bodyguard as he return it to the crew. “I need everything we’ve gathered on how that’s going so far before you all go.”

He saw Yugeom’s shoulders slump in defeat, but Minji and another employee immediately began scrambling for the files on Bullet Transportation. Jisoo watched listlessly as they rattled off things he already knew: phone conferences, PowerPoint data presentations, events that Jisoo had conducted himself in London through the years. All of it was old news, yet somehow the task still felt like it was at the end of an incredibly long and daunting road. The CEO was friendly, but didn’t just make ties with any company, not even one as well-known as his family’s. He’d seen his father take on much tougher beasts for years, but now it was Jisoo’s turn.

He turned back to Mingyu, allowing his shoulders to relax for just a moment when the guard returned the look. This time, he offered a small smile in his boss’s direction before his gaze turned ahead, staring at the aisles of working employees.

Jisoo sighed, putting his hand out to Yugeom. “I’ll take all the files you have and take it from here.” He said simply. “My Father seems very focused on this one. I wouldn’t want you guys to be given any slack for it. So allow me to take the burden.” 

“Ah…” Yugeom’s eyes sparkled. “You’re amazing, Sir.” He beamed. Jisoo smiled a bit, taking the files into his hand. Yugeom bowed. “Good luck!”

“Fighting!” Minji gasped, and the rest of the crew overlapped in praise. Jisoo looked over those assigned under him. 

“We’ll get lunch when I close the deal,” he said. With a wave of his hand, he finally headed off, allowing his crew to head to lunch. He overheard a bit of praise for his kindness and selflessness as he walked off, and he couldn’t help but chuckle to himself. “Unbelievable optimism they have,” he said to Junhui, who only chuckled in amusement. 

Jisoo’s office was silent as he strolled in, flicking on the light and tossing his coat on the back of one of the couches. He walked to his chair, sinking down and letting his head loll back against the chair. 

“I’ll let you get some work done,” Junhui said simply, before excusing himself. Jisoo watched as Mingyu turned on his heel to follow, but he immediately perked up.

“Mingyu,” he called. “Stay a minute.” 

Mingyu’s eyebrows furrowed, but he waited for Junhui to exit the room to close and lock the door. For a second, he didn’t move, his back still facing Jisoo. The heir watched as he slowly turned around. Joshua watched his face. He looked guarded, eyes distant as he stared at his boss. The same unsure state Jisoo had seen ever since the gala. 

But Joshua was an optimist, after all, perking up in his seat. “Are you alright?”

Mingyu exhaled. “Yes Sir. I’m alright.” 

Joshua smiled a bit. “You don’t have to be formal with me right now, Mingyu…”

“I insist….”

Joshua’s smile fell as he watched Mingyu fix the sleeve of his shirt awkwardly. “You’re being weird.”

“I’m just working, Sir…” Mingyu said softly. “That’s all.”

“Well….maybe later we-.”

“I have a shift at the shop tonight, I’m sorry.” Joshua’s frown deepened as Mingyu offered a deep bow. “I’ll let you get to work.” And before Joshua could get another word in edgewise, Mingyu was out the door, and the same suffocating silence came back stronger than ever. 

—--------

It’s been three days. Three days since Joshua was tasked with this ridiculous job involving Bullet Transportation. Three days cooped up in his office until the late hours, reading documents, typing reports, and planning out the steps leading up to his conversation with Mr. Taylor, the company’s CEO. He’d met Mr. Taylor a handful of times at London events, the pair chatting about the possibility of their companies coming together in the future. Jisoo was mostly making polite conversation then, but well, here they were. And Jisoo was stressed. 

Not necessarily because of the phone call, but because of everything else. On top of being in actual work mode for three days because he had nothing better to do, he’d been starving for a mental release for more than a week. Mingyu had barely been able to look him in the eye at work, his gaze clouded in uncertainty and nervousness in the same way it was when the pair first reconnected. No more warm gazes or playful smiles in passing, or teasing conversations when the two were alone in the halls. And after work, Mingyu was like a ghost, still completely ignoring Joshua’s texts to get together. He was always picking up more shifts at the coffee shop, even more so than normal.

This meant all this time without sex, without anything, and Jisoo could feel the tension piling up in every fiber of his being. The conversation was always the same.

“Are you alright, Mingyu?”

“Yes, Sir, just got home late last night.” 

“Yes, Sir, just tired.”

“Yes, Sir. I might be coming down with something.”

It was already dark, and most of the building was long gone by now. Joshua could hear the nighttime wind against the window outside, and every time it hit the glass, he grimaced. 

The drum of Joshua’s fingers echoed through his office for the last twenty minutes. His eyes were staring at the phone number written on a sticky note against his computer. There was no more time to be fooling around. He needed to make this call, and he was already five minutes behind. But for some reason, his fingers just wouldn’t pull from the desk. He turned to the right, glancing out the window. He could see Mingyu’s shoulder barely through the glass, occasionally shifting as he stood between his feet. With a sigh, Joshua yanked his hand up to his phone, grabbed it off the line, and pressed it to his ear. His fingers typed in the number, while his other hand took over the position of quietly drumming, but this time on his pant leg. 

The other line rang for a few seconds, and Joshua waited with soft breaths. His father was very adamant that, out of all the international deals they were working on, this one was the most important. He couldn’t help but feel his heart pick up as the ringing stopped and the line clicked.

“Hello, thank you for calling Bullet Transportation. How can I help you?”

The sweet English accent on the side made Joshua sigh, and he couldn’t help but smile. “Hello, I’m calling for Mr. Taylor. Mr. Hong from Hong International.”

“Oh, he’s been waiting. Just a moment, I’ll transfer you.” Joshua nodded, offering ‘thanks’ just as the line went dead. It took a few seconds, but eventually, a male voice entered the other line. 

“Hello?”

“Mr. Taylor, I’m sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Ah! Mr. Hong! Or can I call you Joshua? Jisoo? Which one do you prefer?”

Joshua grimaced. “Ah… J…” he swallowed. “Jisoo is…. fine… How are you?” 

“Good, good! How’s it feel to be back home in Korea?”

“Oh, it’s very nice.” Joshua laughed a bit. “Good to… good to be home.” his eyes flickered towards the door once again. “I was hoping we could talk about that business proposal that was faxed to you by my department lead the other day in more detail.” 

For the next twenty minutes, the pair talked about the deal Joshua had been working painstakingly hard on for the past three days. He couldn’t remember the last time he worked so hard for something in this company, and he realized why he didn’t. He was exhausted. But he played up his businessman voice as he rattled off statistics and benefits, as he laughed at Mr. Taylor’s small anecdotes and his witty quips. But each time it felt Joshua got a step closer to the goal, Mr. Taylor decided to pull the finish line another five steps away. He was a cheeky bastard; no wonder his transportation company was one of the best in the world. 

Joshua’s eyes flickered to the clock on the wall across the room; drumming his fingers now replaced with spinning a pen idly in his hand. It was still the afternoon in London, but it was well past Jisoo’s skin care and bedtime here. He ran a hand through his hair. “I hope I’ve at least convinced you a little bit about how beneficial your company’s merging with ours would be for both of us.”

“Well, I’ll admit, Mr. Hong, you do make a convincing argument.” Mr. Taylor said. “But I still have some concerns I want to iron out with you.” Joshua swallowed down his sigh. “Well, Sir, any concerns you have, I’m happy to answer.”

“I know, I can tell.” Mr. Taylor said with a laugh. “But it’s late there for you, no?”

“That doesn’t matter.”

“Well, maybe not to you. But it does to me,” he laughed. “Besides, I can’t stall any longer. My husband is waiting outside my door for me. We have lunch reservations.” The entire world stilled, the only sound echoing in Joshua’s ear being the clack of the pen on the floor beside him. He only offered it a glance before Mr. Taylor’s voice cut back through. “Mr. Hong?”

“Oh, yes.” Joshua laughed. “I’m sorry,” he said. “Lunch, you said. That sounds lovely.” 

“Yeah, we’ve been planning it for a few weeks now. But listen, I’m going to be in Japan in a few weeks for a personal vacation. If you have the time, I can work out some strings and have us meet face to face. Give us the right amount of time to talk.”

"Face to face… of course. That sounds great. I’ll have my secretary reach out to you in the next few days to schedule something.” Joshua ran a hand through his hair, and only when it hit the base of his neck did he feel his fingers shaking against his skin. He exhaled.

“Excellent!” Mr. Taylor seemed thrilled at the idea of extending his vacation. “Well, I’ll be seeing you soon then, have a good night.”

“You too, uh… yes… Yes, enjoy your lunch, and have a good day.” Joshua stammered. He couldn’t even wait for the other line to hang up first, slamming the phone onto the hook as the line went dead. He leaned back in his seat, casting his eyes to the ceiling. 

My husband and I have lunch reservations. He’s waiting for me. 

He said that so casually. Joshua thought to himself. How was that so easy for him?

He’d met with Mr. Taylor a small handful of times while he was in London, the pair meeting for two or three lunches to discuss the bare bones of his father’s intent to merge their entertainment company in the conglomerate's expansion to the West. He’s a nice man, well-dressed and very intelligent. Joshua had to admit he had let his eyes linger on the slightly older man once before. 

Shit, how did I not notice? Was I not supposed to notice? There’s no way…. I don’t even know what to think. Huh…

He looked towards the clock. It’d only been about two minutes since he hung up the phone, but in those two minutes, Mr. Taylor was most likely walking out to his car with his husband, arm and arm, excited for the lunch they had planned. Close together for everyone and anyone to see. 

His eyes darted towards the door again. Mingyu’s shoulder was out of view now; Joshua found himself craning his neck in hopes of getting even a hint of his blazer. Nothing. Not like he could say anything to him anyway…. Given the circumstances.

Spinning his chair around, Joshua faced the nighttime sky staring back at him through the glass, and the second he let out a shaky exhale, he covered his face before any of the tears burning his eyes could hit his suit. 

---------------

Mingyu’s feet were starting to fall asleep, but all he could do was shift between them. He was exhausted, and his shift technically ended an hour ago. But he knew how important this call was, so neither he nor Joshua had any room to say anything. So, here Mingyu was, checking his watch every time another person was heard closing up their station and heading out for the night. It wasn’t all bad; he saw a few of the other guards making their rounds as they waved to him and took a minute to catch up.

When Mingyu was alone, though, it was the hardest. It was hard to stand in complete silence, alone with his own thoughts, and worse, a mixture of everyone else’s.

Joshua’s voice and Namjoo’s stare have been bubbling in his head since the fashion show, a mixture of high expectations and little reward. All of it led to Mingyu being unable to look Joshua in the eye at all, much less talk to him. His mind couldn’t help but wander. 

How long was the other person expected to be the other person? Is he the other person? Will Joshua expect this to continue long into the future, when he’s married, a father, a business owner?! Will Joshua eventually grow tired of him and discard him? How will that affect his career? How will that affect him!?

Not that he could tell any of this to Joshua… given the circumstances… right? 

All the thoughts overflowed in his head, making a harsh pounding against his skull. Mingyu sank to the ground, covering his face in frustration. I can’t do this right now. I need to calm down. If I overthink like this, I’ll make a complete fool of myself. 

Mingyu sighed, letting his head hang limp against his knees for a moment. Nobody was around, luckily, at least nobody who would want to snitch on him. He knew that Joshua had a lot of complex relationships that Mingyu only knew so little about, even with the information from Namjoo. He knew he was the pin in a time-ticking bomb that would explode if just barely touched by the wrong fingers, destroying not only his own life, but Joshua’s as well. And that was the last thing he wanted. 

Standing to his feet, though a bit wobbly, Mingyu dusted his knees and shoulders, raking a hand through his hair. “Okay… that's tomorrow’s problem,” Mingyu whispered to himself. “Or a ‘never’ problem…. Maybe a ‘never’ problem…” he sighed, turning his head to peek into the window. To his surprise, Joshua was not on the phone; his chair turned towards the opposite window. Mingyu tilted his head, watching for some sort of movement. Maybe he fell asleep… His hand idly by the door, just until he caught a glimpse of Joshua’s hand gripping the chair’s arm, curling around the fabric.

Mingyu’s first thought was to turn the knob and push his way inside, but he hesitated. He looked down at his hand, which stayed frozen against the doorknob. He should go in and check on him, that was his job… but did Joshua want him in there right now? He wasn’t sure. 

But it was his job, so…

Sighing, Mingyu finally pushed open the door. “Sir?” The word slipped out like a professional force of habit, but it felt so unnatural on his lips when the two were alone. His eyes fell on the chair. It was spun back around now, and Joshua was already up. He rounded the desk, tugging his coat off the back of his chair and tossing it on.

“Let’s go,” he said simply, walking past Mingyu without so much as a second glance. Mingyu tried to catch his expression, but he didn’t turn back around.

Joshua sat in the back seat on the drive home and didn’t say a word.

-----------------

“I told you, I have it handled!” 

“Jisoo, it’s the end of the week, and you have nothing to show for it!”

“Does this major dinner that I have coming up with the CEO of the company not fucking count as ‘something to show for it’?! I was up until almost midnight on that phone call!”

“Congratulations, you know what it means to put in some damn work for once! But I asked for results by the end of this week, and you couldn’t even handle that.”

Jisoo’s eyes widened, an unbelieving smile on his face. “You’re serious? Am I dreaming?” He put his hands on his hips as he began pacing the front of his father’s desk. “Did you seriously expect me to get this entire thing done in a week? Is this not enough for now? What’s one more week?”

“Because I told you I wanted it done and on my desk by a certain time, and you didn’t do it! Now in a week, if it doesn’t happen...”

“It will!”

“How? You couldn’t convince him before. Will this meeting be any different?”

Jisoo fell quiet, watching as his father got up from his seat. “It’s clear if I have any desire to make this merger a success, I’ll have to handle it myself.”

“Wha- you’re kidding me? You want me to put in all this work for something you’re going to take from me?!”

“If I think it’s in the best interest of the company, then I absolutely will!” 

Jisoo clicked his tongue. “You did this on purpose,” he said. “I can tell. You wanted me to fail or something.”

“Please, don’t blame me because you couldn’t make a simple deadline. You couldn’t handle anything overseas, and you can’t handle anything here. I wonder if you ever put your all into this merger or if you half-assed it like you do everything else!” 

“Then why the hell do you keep me around if you don’t think I can handle anything?” Jisoo asked, stepping back when there wasn’t as much bite in the words as he had hoped. 

Mr. Hong tilted his head. “...Because you’re my son,” he said. “And somewhere in you is a great businessman. A promising heir. But you run when things get hard. Mr. Taylor pushed back the meeting, and instead of fighting to keep him on the line, you let him hang up. You hide from your responsibilities as a future husband and heir behind these games you play because you know you’ll never be good enough for them. But with enough effort, you will be. I’ll make sure of it.” 

Jisoo scoffed. He was at a complete loss for words. He ran a hand along his face. “He was busy.” He said simply, remembering the excitement in the CEO’s voice as he talked about lunch with his partner. “If he wasn’t interested, he wouldn’t have worked his schedule around to make sure we could meet while he’s over here.”

“Mm… excuses.” Mr. Hong said. He turned back to his computer. “You can go.” 

Jisoo turned to Junhui, who silently opened the door. Jisoo exhaled, not even bowing at his father as he stormed out of his office. 

-----------------

Joshua was quiet the entire walk back to the office, Mingyu and Junhui following behind dutifully. Once he was inside, he walked straight to the front of his desk and pressed his hands on the sides. 

“Unbelievable,” he said under his breath. “He’s unfucking believable!” He turned to his assistant and bodyguard. “Did… did you fucking hear that shit?!”

“I did,” Junhui said. “But he might just be bluffing. Don’t let it stress you out too much. Mr. Taylor made this appointment with you, not your father.”

“Tsk, like that’ll fucking stop the guy. He’ll go in my place and make the deal and rub it in my face that I couldn’t handle it, then why the fuck does he make me do this shit!?” 

“Sir…” Junhui said softly. Joshua raked his hands through his hair, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling. His eyes fell to Mingyu, blinking a few times. “...Junhui, can you run out to get me something to eat? I feel sick.”

“Of course,” Junhui said. “Anywhere…. Specific?”

“No.” He said. “Just anything. And then reschedule my meetings until the afternoon. And just leave me alone until then.” Junhui nodded his head, quickly excusing himself behind Mingyu and exiting the room. The second the door closed, another, thicker tension spread through the space between them. Almost two weeks of unspoken tension. Mingyu debated saying something, comforting Joshua, even just a bit, despite not having all the answers.

“Hyung.” Mingyu breathed. Joshua's shoulders tensed, but finally he turned around. Mingyu's eyes widened as he watched Joshua lean back on the desk, sharp eyes lifting up to stare at him from behind long eyelashes. Shit.

Joshua ran a hand through his hair before finally pushing off the desk and making his way over. Mingyu's heart was constricted in his chest with every clack of Joshua's shoes against the tile. When he got closer, a hint of a coy smile formed on his face. 

“Are you done being in a mood?” He asked, his voice soft. He reached out, curling his hand around Mingyu's jacket. His entire chest exploded with heat from the gentle touch. 

“Hyu- Sir, wait.”

“Let’s go somewhere.” He said. “I’m free until the afternoon, now.”

Mingyu swallowed the ‘yes’ on his tongue. He wanted to take Joshua away somewhere and just hold him and make him forget about the bullshit in his way right now. But he couldn’t… it didn’t feel right. It didn’t... feel like his place to make that decision. He wasn’t… they weren’t like that. “Hyung, I don’t…”

“Where do you want to go? I can take us anywhere.” 

Mingyu gently reached his hand up, wrapping it around Joshua's. With one tug, he removed his hand. “It’s not that, it’s just… Now isn’t a good time.”

Like a balloon popped and released all its air, Joshua deflated. His fingers retracted. “Tch, why have you been this way recently?” He asked, eyes narrowing.

“I’m not being any way.” He insisted. “I’m working. And you should be too.” 

Joshua’s eyebrow arched. “You sound like my father.” He hissed, venom dripping from his lips. “What the fuck is your problem, hm?” 

Mingyu frowned. “I don’t have a problem. I just think we should take it easy…” Joshua’s frown deepened as Mingyu inhaled. “That’s all.”

“....Wh…” Joshua blinked. “What the hell? We’re doing song and dance again?”

“I don’t want to cause any problems.”

It took a second, but Joshua’s eyes widened. “Did Namjoo say something to you after all?!” Joshua asked, panic overflowing the stress in his eyes. Mingyu instinctively felt his hand reach forward, but he stopped before it could pass his hip. “I told you not to worry about it. It’s not what you think it is.”

“No.” Mingyu’s voice wavered in the lie. “No, she didn’t say anything to me. What would she even say?”

“Then what? You haven’t acknowledged me since the fashion show. What happened to have you acting this way?”

“Sir, please, this isn’t the time or place.”

“Then when is it?! You don’t talk to me anymore!” Joshua said. “...What did I do?!”

Mingyu’s mouth fell open, his eyes softening. Joshua seemed to realize the question left his mouth and he immediately looked away, putting his hands in his pockets.

“Nothing…” Mingyu said softly. Shit. He didn’t want it to veer into this territory. He had to steer them back on track, keep things calm for Joshua’s sake. “You didn’t… But you’re busy. You said yourself this is an important job; you’re clearly very focused on it. You can’t risk getting in trouble.” 

“I don’t give a fuck if I get in trouble. What am I, six? I don’t need to explain what I do to you, Mingyu.”

“Even when I’m involved in it?” Mingyu’s eyes widened. “When I’m putting everything in my life on the line for you. Before you know it, you’ll be so deep in your own denial you’ll be married with kids, running this company, and miserable!” He said. “And will I be there then to pick up the pieces, when I shouldn’t even be now?” 

“What are you trying to get at?” Joshua asked. “Are you saying you don’t want to do this anymore?

“No.” Mingyu exhaled. “No, I just…don’t understand why you choose to put on an act like this.” 

“I don’t have a choice,” Joshua stressed. “You’re not a fucking idiot, Mingyu, use your head.”

“I have been! And I know it’s only a matter of time before this crashes and fucking burns. Then what am I supposed to do?!” He thought back to Mr. Hong’s ghost of a pleased smile while simultaneously putting down Joshua just barely within the confines of the office. His heart constricted momentarily before pulsating with frustration. With anger. “I sometimes wonder if you even care. I try to tell myself that you do, but lying is so easy for you.” Mingyu bit his lip. “Does the apple really not fall far from the tree in this case?” 

That was the last straw and Mingyu regretted it the second it left his lips. But the comment hung between them now. Joshua whipped around, eyes wide and an accusatory finger right in his face. “You know what, just because you're a good fuck doesn’t mean you have a god damn clue about anything! Okay? Don’t you dare act like you know my life, because you have no fucking idea! You’re not my fucking boyfriend!” His finger jabbed into Mingyu’s chest, barely a pinch of physical pain, but a gunshot wound of emotions. 

Mingyu couldn’t stop himself. No matter how hard his brain tried to wrangle his heart back into his cage, it was no use. His emotions were burning a fire through him, any emotional maturity shoved out of his body with that one jab. 

“I know that all you do is pretend. What else are you pretending about, I wonder? What else are you hiding?” Joshua blinked as his finger fell, hand falling to his side. Mingyu’s voice softened, but stayed at the same volume. “Do you know how much it hurts me watching you do this to yourself? How much it hurts watching you do this-.” He reached out, grabbing Joshua’s chin. “With anyone else?” 

Joshua tensed, looking up at Mingyu. His hand flew up, gripping the hand Mingyu had on his chin. “You don’t know anything about my life, don’t get a bold streak like this!” 

“You’re right, I have no idea about you or your life beyond the few things you’ve told me. But I do know what it feels like to have to stand around and pretend to be one thing when I really am another.”

“Hah. Oh? And what’s that? Pretending not to be embarrassed about being a college dropout or something?” He rolled his eyes, settling his gaze towards the wall of college certificates and business degrees he had. Mingyu’s fingers gently guided Joshua’s gaze back to him. “Please, fucking spare me.”

Mingyu let that one roll off his shoulder. He leaned in close, their gazes locking. “No, it’s because I have to always pretend like I don’t want to kiss you stupid every hour of the fucking day.”

Joshua's eyes faltered, but he didn't adjust his gaze. “Then take your own advice and fucking do it.” Joshua hissed. So, Mingyu inhaled, leaning in just enough to press a bruising kiss to Joshua’s lips. Or he would have… if Joshua didn’t try tugging himself out of Mingyu’s grasp so quickly, his hands bracing themselves on Mingyu’s biceps. 

In an instant, Mingyu’s hands were off him, taking a large step back. The room fell eerily quiet, and guilt washed over Mingyu like a tidal wave. His breaths were short, shaky at best, as he stared across the floor at the heir, who immediately turned his head. Mingyu could see his eyes, shaky and starting to turn red. 

“I…” Mingyu pulled back, and Joshua inhaled the next breath loudly. Like he forgot how to, and a seed of guilt bloomed in his stomach. “I’m sorry.”

Joshua shook his head, his own thumb rubbing along his lips. “Whatever…” his voice shook, before he coughed into his hand.

“I’m sorry.” He repeated as if it held some kind of heavier weight a second time. 

“Whatever,” Joshua said. “I have stuff to do. Forget it… Get… get the fuck out.” And without another word, Joshua turned on his heel and walked back to his desk, sitting down in the chair. 

Mingyu felt a burning in the back of his throat, but with a professional nod of his head, he was out the door, the click of the lock piercing straight through his chest. “Shit…” he whispered under his breath, his head falling forward. “What the fuck was that….?”

---------------

Joshua didn’t leave his office the rest of that morning, even when Junhui returned with his food. So, he stood by the door, his entire body heavy with guilt. His fingers tingled, and he could still feel the sensation of Jisoo tugging back from the grip on his chin. Mingyu tried to picture his face then, beyond the teary eyes, to make sure he didn’t leave a red mark. He didn’t see one, but he was so stunned he couldn’t say for sure, and that only made him feel worse. 

Mingyu listened as the clock struck noon; he heard footsteps. They were heavy and commanding; Mingyu didn’t need to look up from the floor to see the face of their owner. Because this was just what he needed right now, right? To deal with Joshua’s father again. With a deep swallow, Mingyu lifted his head just as Mr. Hong walked over. 

“Hello, Mingyu,” he said. Mingyu nodded politely. “How have you been?”

“Well, Sir. Thank you.”

“Mm, adjusting alright? I know my son can be….” he tilted his head, almost an eerily similar image to Joshua’s. Mingyu felt acid boiling in his throat. “A handful.”

“Hah. No, Sir. It’s nothing like that.” Mingyu said quickly. Mr. Hong inhaled. “Your son has been very… mmm, accommodating to me since I’ve started.”

“You’re too kind, Mingyu.” He chuckled. “But trust me, you’ll come to see how difficult it can be to work for him. Mr. Lim was the only guy who could handle him. All the others either quit or got fired.” He shrugged. “A shame things turned out the way they did with him.”

“I see.”

“I’m sure we won’t have that problem again.” His sharp eyes locked on Mingyu, and his heart almost jumped into his throat.

“No!” he said quickly. “No, not at all. I promise.” Mr. Hong smiled, nodding his head. 

“Good.” He turned towards the office Mingyu was guarding. “Is he working?”

Mingyu inhaled. “I… don’t know. Last time I looked in there, he was sitting at his desk.”

“At least he’s not trying to leave.” He scoffed. “Ridiculous. Did Chan tell you about the doors he uses to try and leave during his shift?”

He didn’t have to. “Yes.” Mingyu nodded. “I… make sure he doesn’t leave.” 

“Good.” He shook his head. “I swear, how he ended up with his mother’s insubordination despite everything is beyond me.” 

Mingyu tilted his head, watching as Mr. Hong waved away any questions before Mingyu had enough time to process them. “Keep up the good work, Mingyu,” he said. Looking him over, he nodded. “Your father would be proud of how far you’ve come.” 

“Thank you…” Mingyu bowed again. Mr. Hong nodded.

“I didn’t just give you this position because you showed your dedication to this company.” He stepped closer, and Mingyu’s spine cracked as he straightened up more. “But I gave it to you in hopes your… personality traits would start rubbing off on my son.” 

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m hoping by being around you, someone responsible, work-oriented, someone whose father was most likely proud of him, he’ll learn to pick up on those qualities. Before his life ends up in the gutter.”

Mingyu’s mouth opened. “Heh, Sir, don’t you think that’s a bit… harsh?” Mr. Hong shook his head.

“Harsh, no? It’s realistic. I’m tough on my son because I know his potential. He’s just a selfish child, you’d think I spoiled him rotten growing up.” He seemed frustrated with the situation he was faced with regarding his son. “But he’s just always been this way. Mr. Lim learned that quickly enough in his role not to please my son. You will too, I’m sure. You’ll see what you’re dealing with and adapt accordingly.” 

The air between them was heavy, and Mingyu felt it was all sucked up by Mr. Hong’s presence. He was studying Mingyu, making sure he understood the role he was put in. Not to just protect him, but to help Mr. Hong is molding him into someone worthy of his name. He managed a nod of his head, though the strain pinched at his neck.

“Sir–.” Mr. Park finally spoke, catching the CEO’s attention. Mingyu exhaled a shaky breath, relieved to be out from under the microscope of Mr. Hong’s gaze. “We have a meeting to get to.”

“Right.” Mr. Hong nodded. He turned to Mingyu again. “I’ll be seeing you around, Mingyu.”

“Y-yes, Sir.” He bowed his head, keeping himself at an angle until Mr. Hong started down the hallway. He closed his eyes, listening as the footsteps on the floor got farther and farther away. When they were gone altogether, he stood up again. “Jeez…” he breathed. Turning his head back towards the office, he peeked inside the window. Joshua was still at his desk, listless eyes staring at the computer. 

Mingyu rested his head against the wall, closing his eyes and taking a few soft breaths. 

Regardless of what he felt, nothing was going to be solved if the two just kept avoiding the topic or screaming. It seemed Joshua dealt with enough of that in his daily life, and Mingyu didn’t want to be another figure he constantly had to put his defenses up against. 

---------------------

That night’s car ride was the worst thus far. Jisoo sat in the backseat, staring out the window, and Mingyu couldn’t muster the courage to look at him through the rearview mirror. 

Well, he did once, but Jisoo glanced up to meet the gaze, and Mingyu got so nervous he almost ran the car off the road. Maybe Junhui should drive Jisoo home until things smooth over.

As the Hong residence came into view, Mingyu slowed the car and put it in park. He got out and rounded the car, opening the door. Jisoo stepped out, staggering forward as his foot caught. Without missing a beat, Mingyu reached his hand out, pressing it on Jisoo’s waist to catch him. The heir gasped in surprise, immediately looking up at his bodyguard. Mingyu gulped. For a split second things felt normal, so normal in fact that Mingyu bit into his lip when he felt the urge to lean in and kiss him. He couldn’t, even in better circumstances. 

The entire thirty seconds felt like a minute, the pair not breaking eye contact until both of Jisoo’s feet were on the pavement. 

Jisoo smoothed out his shirt, finally breaking eye contact between them, and the cool evening air almost knocked Mingyu over as the heir walked into his home. Waiting just long enough for the front door to close, Mingyu got back in the car and started off. He drove for a few seconds before thinking: Maybe Junhui should drive Jisoo around again until things smooth over. 

The thought made Mingyu grip at the steering wheel ….Would they ever smooth over? Or was this the beginning of a very messy end?

It was the longest weekend of Mingyu’s life. From early Friday morning to midday Sunday, Mingyu and about 30 other people who were employed with different rich families as security, were all just stranded in the mountains of Korea with just so much food, small shacks that were only there for this purpose, and one very, very aggressive trainer.

The crew were basically pushed to the limits of physical and emotional strength; their will put up for examination. If they wanted to serve and protect the elite of the elite, there was no way they could slack off in anything. They needed to be ready for any and all possibilities that could arise; their reflexes had to be sharper than the knife used to cut at them (Mingyu’s arm hurt when that was said). 

Never in his life did Mingyu want to be home so badly, never in his life did his one-bedroom apartment with a broken coffee machine suddenly feel like an island getaway in the sunshine. Chan was right, you really needed to be strong for something like this. He just hoped it would really be worth it. 

Mingyu all but dropped his duffel bag onto the floor, kicking his shoes haphazardly behind him. He groaned, pressing his hand against the first wall in his sight, exhaling when the door swung closed behind him. All he could think about was getting some sleep for the remainder of the weekend. He had to be up bright and early the following morning for his first day. Mingyu dragged his feet as he started towards the bedroom - actually, the couch looked pretty comfortable. 

Not wanting to move any further and simply fall into an endless sleep, Mingyu fell face-first into the couch cushions, groaning in relief to be off his feet. The bus ride did him wonders, but once he stood up, his entire body buckled.

“I don’t know how people do this and survive,” he groaned, words muffled into the pillow. As he rolled on his side, Mingyu draped a hand over his eyes and blocked out the natural sunlight. Over the next few minutes, his breathing finally began to even out, and he could feel himself almost melting into the cushions. His body was feeling just a bit lighter as sleep finally–.

The crack of a fist beating rapidly on Mingyu’s door jolted him straight up, eyes wide and heart immediately beginning to pound in his chest. He looked over to the doorway, taking a second to listen to the noise as he tried to collect his breathing. After a second, Mingyu pulled himself back off the couch and headed towards the door again. The closer he got, the louder the banging became, and the more it felt like his brain was firing off shotguns towards his ears. “Alright, alright!” He groaned, covering his ears. In one swift motion, he unlocked the door and tugged it open, looking down to see Joshua leaning against the doorway. “...Ah!” He groaned, a mix of annoyance and relief as his shoulders slumped. His head lolled to the side, resting on the wall, and closing his eyes.

“....Hi to you too?” Joshua replied, eyebrows arched in amusement. Mingyu pushed himself upright as Joshua walked inside, kicking his shoes off beside Mingyu’s messy ones and using his foot to straighten all of them out. Mingyu’s eyes trailed his guest lazily when they cracked open. Joshua was in a black tank top, his bicep tattoo on full display along his muscles. His hair was covered by a beanie that he tugged off. His hair was still buzzed short, but Mingyu noticed it was starting to regain a little bit of length in certain spots. He looked good, and on any other given day he’d already have him pressed up against the opposing wall. 

“What are you doing here?” Mingyu asked curiously, practically rolling along the wall to watch Joshua go deeper into the apartment.

“I took the day off because I knew you would be coming home today.” He leaned against the opposing wall, spinning his beanie in one hand and putting his other in the pocket of his basketball shorts. “I wanted to see you.”

Mingyu hummed. “You’re about to watch me sleep like the dead.” He said. 

Joshua pouted. “Aww, what?” he asked. “Come on, really?” Mingyu nodded his head. “Nothing?” Mingyu shook his head this time. 

“Consider it a miracle I’m even standing this long for you,” Mingyu whined, a soft smile forming on his face as Joshua finally took the initiative and closed the distance between them. The duo managed one kiss, but Mingyu pulled away when he felt Joshua’s hands slip at the hem of his shirt. “Mm..” He lolled his forehead onto Joshua’s shoulder, closing his eyes. “Hyuuung…”

“Jeez.” Joshua managed a chuckle. “You’re still this tired?”

“They had us training until the fucking bus pulled up. Three miles away. And we had to run there before it left.” 

“Oh yeah.” Joshua snorted. “I forgot they did that.”

“This is your fault, you know,” Mingyu grumbled, his hands loosely wrapping around Joshua’s waist. 

“Mine?!” Joshua pulled back, and Mingyu’s head was left dangling limp between them, hair curtaining around his face. “Why mine?”

“Because you wanted me to be your bodyguard so bad,” he pointed out, straightening his head back up. “So, if you’re hanging around, you’re ordering us food and cuddling. That’s it.”

“Wha-.” Joshua pouted, but still followed Mingyu as he guided them towards the bedroom. “You make it sound like we’re dating.”

Mingyu chuckled. “Oh, are we?” he asked, and Joshua fell silent once again as Mingyu crawled into bed, leaving just enough space for him to join. He’d discarded his company tee shirt, just barely missing the hamper, and fell into the mattress with an exhausted thud. “Don’t you want to shower if you were running?”

“Too tired,” Mingyu grumbled, rolling onto his side. His eyes were barely open, but Joshua could see them staring at him at the edge of the bed. Joshua sighed, walking over and slipping in beside him, sitting up and looking down at Mingyu.

“Good thing you don’t smell.” Joshua teased. He tugged his phone out of his shorts pocket, turning it on and clicking on the various food delivery apps he had. He hummed, scrolling through a few as the bed shifted around him. After a minute, he asked: “What are you even in the mood-.” But the question was cut short, looking down to see Mingyu already asleep, sprawled out on his back with one arm draped across Joshua’s legs. His entire body was relaxed, and barely under the covers provided. “Wha- oh my god.” Joshua groaned. “Seriously? Before you could even tell me what you want?” He reached down, poking at Mingyu’s forehead. It was still a bit sweaty, even with the air conditioner blasting. Joshua stared down at Mingyu for a minute, reaching to brush some of his hair from his face. When Mingyu’s nose twitched, Joshua chuckled. “Idiot.” He murmured. Lifting his phone back up, he flipped open his camera and snapped a photo. 

Joshua was now left to his own devices regarding food. All of his food delivery staples were in Seoul, and didn’t deliver this far out. So, he had to look more local. There were a few options within the perimeter of the apartments, but none looked all that appealing.

This place made the best kimchi jjigae that I’ve ever eaten. I’ll have to take you sometime.

Joshua looked down at the dead weight at his side, snoring lightly. With a hum, Joshua began searching for local kimchi jjigae shops in the area. It only took a few clicks and a few skims of reviews before he found it. The website was mostly photos of the different foods, including kimchi jjigae, and Joshua felt his stomach grumble. Perfect. He skimmed the menu for a few moments before he dialed. Glancing down at Mingyu one more time, he slithered out of bed, fixing the covers and heading out of the room just as a cheery female picked up on the other line. 

“Thanks for calling ChaeChaeGo. What can we do for you?” 

“Hi, I want three orders of kimchi jjigae, two extra orders of rice and miso soup, and an order of bibimbap for delivery, please.” Silence was heard on the other phone, Joshua waiting for a response as he checked his reflection in the nearby mirror. He ran a hand through his hair. “Hello?”

“Oh, uh…. Okay. Sir, I’m really sorry, but we don’t offer delivery services here.”

“What?!” Joshua asked, eyes widening. “You’re kidding me!”

“I know, I’m really sorry,” she said. “We just don’t have the transportation or man-power to do that. I really am sorry for the inconvenience.” 

“What kind of restaurant doesn’t have delivery in the modern decade?!” Joshua asked, putting a hand on his hip. “This is crazy.”

“Again, I’m really sorry.” Chatter was heard on the other line, and he heard the young girl talking slightly off the phone. “No, they wanted it delivered, but I said we don’t do that.” Joshua sighed, rolling his eyes as he checked his watch. 

“This is bad business, you know. Delivery is like, all over the place in Seoul. And probably here, too. I can find like a million places that will deliver.”

“Ah, well-” The girl stammered. “No, I know.” She was pulled away again, her voice muffled. “No, don’t worry. It’s ok, I got it.” After a second, she was back on the phone. “The shop owner said she’s more than happy to make it and set it aside to be picked up.”

“Picked-.” Joshua clicked his tongue. Whoever heard of that? How the hell was this place, somewhere Mingyu loved so much, much less so popular? It was so inconvenient! He turned back to the bedroom, listening to the muffled snores of Mingyu, still lost in dreamland. He huffed. 

“Sir?”

“Fine. I’ll pick it up.” He finally said. He repeated the order to her before she finally hung up. Joshua let his hand holding the phone drop to his side, and he groaned, running a hand through his hair. “Come on.” He walked back to the front hall, slipping on his shoes and looking around. Mingyu’s keys were on the hook, and he grabbed them, stuffing them in his pocket. “This food better be worth it.” he groaned, stepping out and closing the door hard behind him. 

---------------

Joshua could hear the ruckus coming from inside the small hut-like building even before he approached the entrance. He cocked an eyebrow, scanning the front. There were a few folding chairs perched outside, and a small rock path leading around to what he could only assume was the back of the building. On top of the awning over the front was a hand-made sign that read ‘ChaeChaeGo’ in large, brown letters. This was definitely the place. 

“Huh.” Joshua hummed. He waited outside for a few seconds, shifting between his feet. The front door opened, and he watched an older couple step out, offering him a confused glance as they walked by, talking amongst themselves. Joshua nodded his head politely before finally slipping through the screen door and into the building. It was much bigger inside and much hotter. The heat of the kitchen wafted through the entirety of the building, and the customers packed inside like sardines were no help. He rubbed his ears as he heard one of them shouting for another beer.

“One minute!” A girl called, poking her head from around the corner. Joshua recognized the voice as the girl on the phone. Her eyes widened. “Aahh, Uncle, another? You’re going to get sick!” She teased, grinning as the older man only laughed in response and insisted on another. She disappeared behind the wall once again, her tight ponytail bouncing behind her. 

Joshua’s attention was pulled by a male approaching him, fixing his apron, and carrying a plate of soups and drinks. “Hi. Take a seat anywhere, we’ll just be a minute.”

“A se- what?” Joshua asked, tracking as the male darted off without another word. He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest as he turned to the few empty tables just a few feet away. The two servers, both of whom seemed to just barely be through their twenties, were scurrying around the tables with ease, making familiar chatter as they served full plates and removed empty ones. 

The girl was next to approach Joshua, fixing her ponytail and smiling enough to flash her teeth and poke out her dimples. “Hi! You can take a sea-.”

“I’m not here to sit,” Joshua said curtly. When he saw the girl’s lips dip into a frown, he clarified. “I just called about putting in an order. To pick up.” He looked around. “And leave. Since you guys don’t have delivery.”

The memory flashed in her mind, but she still smiled. “Right! I’m so sorry. Well, let me just check with the-.”

“Eunchae!” A voice from the back of the building called, and Joshua saw the waitress’s attention pulled. “I need this food taken before it gets cold. What are you doing?!”

“That pick-up order is here, Grandma!” Joshua blinked as he heard footsteps approaching, and soon a smaller, older woman was shuffling across the floor. And her eyes were locked directly on Joshua. He gulped, brows furrowing as she approached. “Grandma, he-.”

“You were the brat who shouted at my granddaughter on the phone?!” The older woman shouted. Joshua’s eyes widened. 

“I’m sorry?” He asked. 

“Clean out your ears, boy! I know you heard me!” She snapped. Joshua’s gasp of surprise was met with a swat of a rag pulled off the old woman’s shoulder, hitting him square in his arm. 

“Ow! I didn’t shout!” He cried, clutching his arm where it stung. 

“And now you’re lying?! Children today have no manners! I heard the way you were shouting on the phone! Just because we won’t deliver to you, who on earth are you anyway?!”

“Wha- hey!” Joshua shouted, his arms coming up and trying to block every swat of the woman’s rag. “What are you doing?!” 

“Teaching you some manners! Clearly your parents didn’t!” Joshua flinched as the woman landed one more thwack on his leg. “I can not stand rude children like you! Bratty children are no good!” Joshua knelt down, gripping his leg where his knee was struck. His eyes shot up to the woman, who now towered over him at this angle. She tossed her rag over her shoulder once again. He groaned in pain, rubbing his leg where it stung. “Have a seat. The food isn’t ready yet.” 

“The foo- It’s not ready? It took me almost 30 minutes to walk here!” 

“Do you look like the only person in this place?! Now sit down and learn some patience! Aigoo..” The woman turned on her heel, motioning to the closest empty table as she headed to the back of the kitchen. Joshua watched her go, listening as she lectured to Eunchae, following behind. “Eunchae, honey, don’t marry a man like that. Men like that are no good, selfish brats.” 

“Okay, Grandma.” Eunchae nodded, turning her head once again to get a look at Joshua before heading into the kitchen. Joshua groaned, finally pushing himself to his feet again when he heard the world around him simply continue with business as usual. He turned to the empty table beside the entrance and sighed, walking over and plopping down on the chair. He kicked one leg over the other, and when he heard some of the men nearby whispering, pulled his mask over his face. 

“Unreal,” he mumbled to himself. “Bratty, no manners, yet she’s smacking me in public.” He pouted under his mask, running a hand through his hair. “Whatever. Food better be worth it.” 

For the next 20 minutes, Joshua was almost invisible to the workers, watching like a hawk as the two servers shuffled around food and carried plates back to be cleaned. Each time one of them passed, they barely offered him a glance before work tugged them away. Joshua was starting to wonder if they ever started his food in the first place, with how long it was taking; he didn’t order that much!

Joshua sighed, leaning back in his chair and looking down at his phone. I should be in bed resting right now, yet here I am doing this. He thought to himself. His mind flashed to Mingyu, curled up in his bed under the covers and snoring up a storm. How exhausted yet peaceful he looked, curled up at Joshua’s side. He sighed, closing his eyes and resting his chin in his hand, leaning against the table. 

A distraction came in the form of a phone call, the caller ID flashing Namjoo’s name. He sighed, pressing the green button and pressing it tightly against his ear. “Hello?”

“Hey, what-.” Namjoo paused. “Where are you? A restaurant?”

Joshua looked around, tugging his mask down just under his lips. “Yeah. Why?”

“Bad time? Are you on a date?” Namjoo teased.

“Heh, wouldn’t you like to know.” He rolled his eyes. “Just waiting on my food. What’s up?” 

“Nothing. My parents are just finalizing some stuff for this weekend’s show.” She paused, and Joshua could faintly hear a pen scraping across paper. “You’re coming, right?”

“I suppose I don’t have a choice,” Joshua stated. He heard Namjoo chuckle a bit. “Yes, I’ll be there.” 

“Good.” Namjoo was silent for a minute. “So, seriously. Are you on a date? Is it with your Waterbomb friend?”

Joshua sighed. “Namjoo, we need to get you a boyfriend so you stop being in my business.” He said, smiling when he heard her high-pitched laugh on the other end. “No, I’m not on a date.” Technically. He thought about the man sleeping while waiting for him to come home with food, and something in his chest felt unusually fuzzy. 

“But then I’ll be too busy with that man to focus on you. I can only handle one man at a time.”

“That sounds like a ‘you’ problem.” Joshua’s eyebrows furrowed, and he chuckled. As he listened to Namjoo talk about some preparation for the show that she was tasked with specifically, time felt like it’d frozen for a moment, his annoyance of the space around him frozen with it. He exhaled, pulling his mask back over his nose and leaning back in his chair. He looked over to the kitchen just as the owner scolded the same man for wanting yet another beer. 

“What restaurant are you at anyway?” Namjoo asked.

“Oh, it’s uhm…” he pursed his lips. “It’s out of town. Like an hour away. Heard good things…”

“From your date?”

“Okay, bye!” Joshua huffed, hearing Namjoo laugh again. “Seriously, we’re getting you a boyfriend!” And he hung up, setting his phone back down and stretching out the muscles in his neck. “God, how much longer is this going to-?”

“Sir?” A voice perked up, and his eyes snapped open. Eunchae was standing at his side, smiling sweetly. 

“Hm. Is it ready?” he asked.

“Just about. Another few minutes.” She bowed her head. “I’m sorry for the wait.”

Joshua sighed. “Wow.” He breathed. He watched as Eunchae pulled a glass off her tray, setting it in front of him. 

“While you wait, please have something to drink,” she said, motioning to the water. “It’s hot outside today.” She nodded her head. Joshua looked at the water, taking it into his hands. 

“Oh well…” Joshua coughed, tugging his mask down a bit. “Thank you…”

Eunchae bowed a bit deeper this time. “And I wanted to apologize for my grandmother. She’s very blunt, but she means well. I hope she didn’t hurt you too much.”

Joshua scoffed behind the rim of his cup. “Hurt me?” He asked, rubbing behind his knee. “No, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” He turned back to the young woman. “You said your name was-.”

“Ah.” She pressed a hand to her chest right by her little name tag, a cute silver strip pinned to her apron. “Hong Eunchae.” she said, and gave another bow.

Joshua’s fingers tightened on his glass. “Sorry?”

“Noona!” Eunchae’s attention was pulled as her brother jogged over, hands on his hips. “Stop flirting with the customers! Grandma said not to marry that one!”

“Flirt-.” Eunchae gasped, covering her cheeks as they turned red. “Hey, don’t be so vulgar!” She shouted, swatting at his shoulder as he dodged it. “Ugh, you’re so annoying!” Eunchae turned back to Joshua, who had his eyes locked on the sibling duo. “I’ll go check on your food.” 

“Uh…” Joshua watched silently as Eunchae jogged back towards the kitchen, swatting her brother as he cackled, collecting a few bottles from the fridge. Joshua turned towards the wall closest to him, littered with family photos spanning decades. His eyes now needed something to focus on, and this was it. The grandmother and her husband were on their wedding day, welcoming their children and watching as they grew up working in the restaurant years ago. How they brought their own children to work as young children, carrying extra towels and napkins, how they spent every summer here until the present. The next generation of a long-lasting, successful business, and its entire story could be mapped out over the course of one sit-down meal, always available to the public. 

There was a sense of familiarity in that fact but then why did Joshua still feel so uneasy, like he was in another world only similar to his in sight.

“Grandma, let me help you with that.” 

Joshua turned his head to the entrance of the kitchen just as Eunchae stopped by it, grabbing a few bags of vegetables her grandma was seemingly trying to relocate. He watched the older woman fight for a minute before both Eunchae and her brother insisted and almost took the bags by force. When they turned their backs, Joshua saw a fond, grateful smile on her face. She walked over to both of her grandchildren.

“One of you will take a break after this, alright?” She encouraged, patting both of their backs. The duo nodded their heads, turning to face their grandmother as she headed back into the kitchen, calling out a few directions to the person cooking in the back.

Joshua looked down at his water, rubbing his hand over his face as he took another long sip of his drink in hopes of swallowing down the acidic feeling boiling in his gut.

It took another five minutes before Joshua was startled to life again, looking in front of him as two giant take-out bags were placed in front of him. When he turned his head, the grandmother was standing beside him. He flinched, holding his hands up. She simply cocked an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her chest. Joshua sighed, looking towards the two bags and getting up out of his seat. “Are you always this busy?” he asked, digging in his back pocket for his wallet.

“It finished about five minutes ago.” She stated. Joshua’s eyes widened, his mouth falling open.

“Five - then… why did you wait to bring it out?!”

“Because you need to learn patience and gratitude, Young Man,” she huffed. “Nobody is going to bend over backwards just because you’re handsome.” 

“Wha-.” Joshua sighed, pulling out his wallet and flipping it open. He took another look at the bags before tugging out the first bill he could grab and passing it over. “Here.” Once his wallet was away, he turned to grab the bags. But before his fingers could curl around the handles, he paused, turning back to the woman. When he glanced up, he saw Eunchae and her brother at two tables, smiles still on their faces as they rushed around completing orders. He felt his heart tighten a bit, licking his lips. With a deep breath, Joshua dipped his head down in the direction of the store’s owner. “Thank you…” He said softly.

He heard a pleased hum as he picked his head up. “A start.” 

Joshua sighed, grabbing the bags and practically sprinting out of the store. As it closed behind him, he thought he heard a shocked: “How much is this?!” but he was already around the corner and headed down the street. 

“Unbelieveable…” he muttered to himself. 

---------------

Joshua could still hear Mingyu snoring in the bedroom as he pushed through the door, kicking off his shoes and letting the door close behind him. He headed into the kitchen, setting the bags on the counter and shaking out his arms. They were throbbing and needed a few stretches to loosen up the tight muscles. Normally, he could lift weights while working out, but he never lifted weights while walking uphill on concrete before. Very different, and much less adrenaline-pumping. 

Joshua was already a bit aggravated as he headed back into the bedroom, pushing the door open and peeking inside. Mingyu had taken over the entire bed by now, limbs starfished out in all directions, and the blanket everywhere but over him. Joshua sighed, narrowing his eyes. Did he have any reason to be annoyed at Mingyu for his experience at the restaurant? No.

…But Mingyu said he liked the place and that’s why he went, so Joshua could easily still spin it to be his fault. Joshua walked over to the edge of the bed, tugging the blankets back over Mingyu’s sleeping body. He stood there for a minute, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You’re lucky you look so peaceful right now…” he said, voice barely a whisper. He turned on his heel, pulling out his phone and heading back out of the room, pressing his phone to his ear as it rang once again. “Hey, Chan?” he hummed, closing the bedroom door behind him. 

---------------

Unsure of how long Mingyu would be asleep, Joshua decided it would be best to store the food in the fridge for now. He approached the large, metal refrigerator and opened it. He had to cover his mouth to hide the gasp that escaped his lips. Confused eyes darted between every single shelf, tugged open every drawer and even opened the freezer. “...It’s practically empty.” He muttered to himself. Closing the door, Joshua immediately began searching the cabinets. Pastas, seasonings, some snacks, and extra unopened condiments. “Oh my God, it’s all empty,” he murmured, eyes widening with every new cabinet he opened and shut. “What the hell? How the hell does this man eat?”

Joshua was so stunned by the state of Mingyu’s kitchen that he didn’t hear footsteps padding through the hall until they were practically at his side. He closed the last cabinet in the kitchen, seeing Mingyu’s sleepy face and shirtless form on the other side of the door. “Holy-!” Joshua yelped, eyes wide. Mingyu tilted his head, an eyebrow arched in confusion.

“Hyung, what are you doing?” he asked. Joshua motioned to the cabinets, arms practically stretched out in front of him.

“I was going to put the food away until you got up, but god there are so many options for space!” He said, turning to Mingyu. His ears tinted pink, and he scratched his neck in embarrassment. “Why is everything basically empty?”

“I haven’t gotten paid yet,” Mingyu said. Joshua blinked, leaning forward as if more needed to be said. “I usually run this low right before my paycheck. I also wait for all of the sales and stuff so I get things a bit cheaper.”

“Then what do you eat?” Joshua asked. 

“I know how to make things last when I’m this close to getting paid,” he assured. Joshua shook his head.

“This won’t do. We need to go food shopping.” He put his hands on his hips. Mingyu chuckled, finally motioning to the bags of food left on the table. Joshua turned his head, watching as the bags opened up and the food, still warm, lingered in the air.

 “Holy shit, is this ChaeChaeGo?!” 

“Uh, yeah.” Joshua watched Mingyu pull out some of the containers, eyes fully wide and awake now. “I had to walk 30 minutes both ways because they don’t deliver. Can you believe that?”

“Yeah, they’ve never done delivery.” Mingyu was already searching for chopsticks in the bag, his eyes swallowing down the food before his mouth. Joshua sighed, sinking down in the seat beside him. 

“Then how were you supposed to take me?”

Mingyu looked over. “I was going to do just that; take you. The owner’s nice.”

Joshua’s entire body stung, gripping his arm where he was swatted with a rag. “Nice?” He asked. Mingyu nodded.

“Mm, I worked there in the summer when I was about 13 to 15,” he said. “It was fun. That was before she had grandkids to kind of take the job, you know?” Joshua watched as Mingyu opened his kimchi jjigae box, groaning in excitement. “Aw man, Hyung, I’m so happy you got this!” And he finally took a bite. He all but moaned into the chopsticks. Joshua’s chest tightened, his cheeks turning red as he finally fished for his own food.

“Yeah, well… whatever,” he said. “I didn’t know where else good and you’ve mentioned this place already, so…. If it sucks, I’m making you pay me back.” Mingyu laughed, looking through the bag and pulling out all of the side dishes and extra bowls with more excitement each and every time. Joshua stuck his own bite into his mouth. He hummed, nodding his head. “Okay, nevermind.” 

Mingyu laughed. “It’s good, right? And it makes amazing leftovers,” he took the bibimbap, putting it in his empty fridge. The duo ate in silence for a few minutes, minus Mingyu’s hums of approval through his meal. Joshua watched, eating at a much slower pace than Mingyu. It was as if he hadn’t eaten one meal in his entire life, but Joshua couldn’t say anything to stop him. Finally, resting his chin on his hand, Joshua spoke.

“Namjoo’s family is releasing a new line at the end of this week.” He said. Mingyu looked over, cheeks puffed out with rice like a chipmunk. “It’s a smaller collection, but it’s still going to be heavily covered by the press, and they always hold big events.”

“Right. I’ve worked a few.” Mingyu said when he swallowed.

“But not as my bodyguard.” Joshua smiled, taking another bite. Mingyu nodded. “I was talking to Namjoo about it while I waited for the food.”

“I cannot believe you actually walked all that way to get it.”

“Yeah, me either!” Joshua’s eyes widened. “Don’t even get me started, okay?” Mingyu laughed, nodding his head and allowing the conversation to return to the fashion show. “It’ll be your first major job as my bodyguard. So, just… be prepared, I guess.”

Mingyu nodded his head. His dish was already gone, completely licked clean as he set the chopsticks down for a moment to digest. He leaned back, running a hand through his hair and exhaling. “I’m glad you liked it,” Joshua said.

“I loved it.” He assured. His head lolled to Joshua, and a small smile graced his lips. “Don’t worry, either. I’ll be ready for whatever comes at the fashion show. Okay?” He flexed a shirtless bicep, and Joshua couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m newly trained now, remember?”

“How could I forget?” Joshua teased.

“Mmm, so don’t worry.” Mingyu’s voice was soft, reassuring, and Joshua bit the inside of his lip.

“I wasn’t worried,” Joshua assured, maybe a bit too quickly as he stuffed his own bite in his mouth. He closed the box up for now, half-finished. Mingyu reached for it, putting it into the fridge when Joshua tossed his chopsticks away. 

Mingyu was the first one to get up from the table, stretching his arms over his head as he started back into the living room. Joshua followed behind, leaving the empty take-out bags on the table for later. Mingyu rounded the corner of the hallway before turning back to Joshua, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms over his chest. “Yes?” Joshua asked.

Mingyu’s eyes did a full body scan of Joshua and he felt each spot get warm under his gaze. It was rare when Mingyu was the initiator, and Joshua drank it up every single time. “You didn’t get dessert, did you?” 

“Dessert?” Joshua asked, immediately breaking into a grin. He reached forward, trailing his pointer finger down Mingyu’s sternum and watching him shiver under the touch. “Mmmm, you sure you’re awake enough now for dessert?” In response, Mingyu reached forward, locking his hand around Joshua’s wrist and tugging him closer, stumbling back towards the bedroom. 

“For now. I need to be up early in the morning.” He closed the door to the bedroom, leaning in to kiss Joshua quickly. “I have to be some guy’s bodyguard.”

“Mm, sounds hot.” Joshua nodded his head, grinning. Mingyu shrugged. “But too bad for you, Chan’s taking your shift tomorrow.” Mingyu’s teasing stopped for a second, blinking as Joshua reached up, gently running a hand through his hair. 

“What?” He asked curiously. 

The duo locked eyes for a minute, and Joshua suddenly felt a wave of nerves in his fingers. “Just… so you could get more sleep tonight,” he said, not realizing how much softer his voice was until the words left his lips. “That’s all.” He avoided Mingyu’s gaze, rubbing a hand over his mouth and cheeks in the hope that the blush he could feel burning into his skin would wipe off with it. 

“Oh, really?” Mingyu smiled. He leaned forward, catching Joshua in yet another kiss. Joshua’s hand slipped from his hair to his cheek, curling around the skin and jawline just a bit. When Mingyu pulled away, his hands tightened on Joshua’s waist. “Well, thank you,” he said. “That’ll give me just enough time to really enjoy dessert before I fall back asleep.” 

 Joshua laughed, flickering off the light just as Mingyu playfully tugged him deeper into the bedroom. 

---------------

“Is this seriously what was picked for me?”

Jisoo groaned, tilting his head back as he watched a handful of his family’s servants brush off any lint from the shoulder of his suit.

“You don’t like it?” Junhui asked, looking up from his clipboard.

“No!” his eyes widened, turning his head. “It’s so boring!” He glanced towards the door as it clicked open, watching as Mingyu had slipped back in. “I look like a bodyguard!”

Mingyu’s head shot up, staring at him in confusion. He did see Mingyu’s eyes dip down, looking Jisoo over. He smoothed out the jacket. It was the evening of Namjoo’s family’s fashion show, the release of their newest line. The press were already at the venue, waiting to see the models, celebrities, and big names that were going to show up. That included Jisoo with Namjoo on his arm and Mingyu at his side. Talk about awkwardness. He was just wearing a plain black suit, picked out by who else but his father. After the entire fiasco with the banquet, Joshua wasn’t even sent out to get a suit this time; this one was delivered to his room just this morning. It had a bit of white trim along the lapels of the jacket and down the slacks. Nothing to write home about and certainly not his style. 

He caught Mingyu opening his mouth to speak, but Junhui beat him to it. “I understand. If it makes you feel any better, you look fine.”

“Looking fine was never the problem, Junhui.” Jisoo put a hand on his hip. “I know I look fine, I look good. I just want to wear something more…. Interesting,” he glanced at himself in the mirror once the servants shuffled away, filing out of the room. He sighed, running a hand through his hair, the fingers forming a fist when they made it all the way through quickly.  “It’s a fashion show; that suit I had picked for the banquet would be perfect.”

Junhui sighed. “Sir, you need to be in the car in ten minutes. We don’t have time to get you something else even if we–.”

“I know,” Jisoo assured. His eyes flickered up to Mingyu, who was still pressed dutifully by the door. “Can you get me water, Junhui?” 

Junhui smiled. “Sure. And I’ll tell the driver that we’ll need another five minutes.” Jisoo smiled a bit, nodding his head as Junhui made his exit. The door closed behind them, and the click echoed through the room. 

Joshua sighed, shaking his head. “This sucks.”

“I think you look good.” Mingyu’s voice as he stared himself over made Joshua inhale, putting his hands on his hips. He could hear footsteps, but for some reason couldn’t bring himself to turn his head. 

“Like I said, looking good isn’t the problem.” Joshua caught Mingyu just as he popped into frame, towering over him. When Mingyu’s hands reached down to wrap around his waist, Joshua didn’t stop him, only saying a simple: “The do–.”

“I locked it,” Mingyu assured. He pulled Joshua’s back against his chest, and he could feel Mingyu’s warmth radiating off of his body. “But really, you look good. Like, crazy good. And I know you know that, but I want to keep saying it.” 

Joshua exhaled, tilting his head back. When his neck couldn’t crane anymore, he turned around, tilting his head up just in time to meet Mingyu in a kiss. It was a soft kiss, Mingyu’s hands brushing under his suit jacket and holding onto his waist. Joshua pulled back.

“We don’t have nearly enough time to–.” 

“I never expected you to say that.” Mingyu cocked an eyebrow. Joshua scoffed, narrowing his eyes. “But I don’t want to. It’d be too rushed.” He brushed a hand, only slightly hiking up Joshua’s suit jacket and brushing some of the shoulder off his arm, exposing the top of his shoulder down to his elbow, which was still covered by his button-up. “Something like this…. Deserves to be peeled off slowly. Not ripped apart. That’s how good you look…” 

“Is that a bribe or something?” he asked, tilting his head a bit. Mingyu shrugged.

“I’m not working late tonight once I get you home.” 

“So… it’s a promise?” Joshua arched an eyebrow, watching Mingyu nod to an almost frantic degree. Joshua snorted as the duo shared another kiss, Joshua being sure to pull him just a bit closer.

Mingyu pulled back, turning towards the clock. The warmth pulled from his body, and Joshua’s eyes followed Mingyu as he clicked the door knob, opening it just in time for Junhui to return with a bottle of water. He walked over to Joshua, who was smoothing his jacket out again, and passed over a water bottle. 

“Thank you.” Joshua breathed, taking a quick sip. He offered one more glance at Mingyu, who nodded his head as the trio headed out to the car.

---------------

The sound of flashing cameras and reporters standing outside the large building, trying to get intel from every well-known face walking inside. Mingyu and Chan got out of their car, watching as Junhui opened the back door and allowed Jisoo to step out. Mingyu watched as he stood up, fixing the lapels of the suit he hated so much and scanning the crowd. He ran a hand through his hair, lips curling into a smile. He was already nodding his head at the cameras all around them. 

Mingyu didn’t realize they’d started to move until he saw Jisoo’s back, and immediately caught back up with their pace, carefully making sure that the press didn’t get too close or move beyond their lines. There were specific reporters and photographers invited to take photos inside and get the important interviews from those in attendance. The walk inside was merely an appetizer to a much larger and more in-depth main course. 

Namjoo was standing with her parents right inside, talking with a few reporters. Namjoo looked over to the group entering and she immediately broke into a grin. Nodding to her parents, she excused herself. Mingyu watched Jisoo’s smile widen a bit as he welcomed her in a hug.

“I was waiting for you.” She beamed. Her eyes did a once-over of his outfit. “Oh, I like this one,” she said. “You look good.”

“So do you.” He motioned to her stunning maroon dress that hit the floor and hugged every part of her body. It was strapless, allowing her neck and collar to sport a stunning silver necklace and matching earrings. “This is amazing.” Jisoo amused, standing back a bit to fully admire the fit. Namjoo chuckled, doing a playful spin. When she faced the group again, her eyes fell to Mingyu. His body tensed, watching as she stepped closer to him. “You’re Kim Mingyu, right? Jisoo’s new bodyguard?”

“Uh, yes ma’am.” Mingyu nodded his head. “Nice to meet you.”

“Please, the pleasure’s all mine! Jisoo has told me all about you.” Mingyu’s eyes snapped to Jisoo, but he was speaking to Junhui about something. Mingyu noticed a hint of red on his ears and wondered what exactly ‘all about you’ meant. “Minghao’s excited, too. He finally has a bodyguard friend that’s his age.”

“What am I then?” Chan asked, pouting. 

“Not my age,” Minghao called, simply appearing behind Namjoo. He looked up at Mingyu and smiled. “Hi.”

“Hi.” Mingyu chuckled, glancing at a pouting Chan.

“You three socialize for a few minutes, get to know one another and talk about whatever bodyguards talk about.” She reached for Jisoo, wrapping her arm around his. He looked over. “We need to go make our rounds before the show starts.”

“Your parents didn’t invite Mr. Kang, did they?” he asked, his hand wiggling free to slip around her waist. Mingyu watched how easy it was, how natural his hand looked against the small of her back. He looked to his feet as he heard the duo make their way off. When he lifted his gaze again, the duo were practically glued at the hip, faces close to one another as they whispered, as Jisoo’s lips curled into an amused grin and his nose scrunched. It was a genuine smile, one filled with amusement. One Mingyu has seen plenty of times at this point, but the number must pale in comparison to how many times it graced Noh Namjoo’s presence. 

“We can wait over here,” Minghao said, motioning to a small section nearby. “Once they’re done with photos and interviews and stuff, we can lead them into the actual show.” 

“Ah, right.” Mingyu nodded his head as he and Chan followed Minghao. For the next twenty minutes, Jisoo and Namjoo were basically celebrities. They were taking press photos in front of the fashion line’s backdrop, from conjoined hearts to cute photos of them pressed against one another's sides. At one point, Namjoo turned to Jisoo to whisper something to him, and he dipped his head a bit lower to listen, and the duo was unable to hold back a shared grin. 

As Mingyu’s eyes followed the couple to a male reporter encouraging them over, all but waving his microphone in their direction. Namjoo talked about the new line and her involvement in it, nestled comfortably into Jisoo’s side as she did so. They really did look the part of a happy couple. Something almost acidic was boiling deep in his gut as he watched the duo talk. 

“Are they always this lovey-dovey?” Mingyu covered his mouth when he heard the words slip past them, turning to Minghao and Chan, arching eyebrows in his direction. “Sorry.”

“I mean, they’re getting married, so I’d kind of hope so,” Chan said. “But they are laying it on a bit thicker than normal, hm?”

“I guess.” Minghao chuckled. “Maybe they’re finally announcing the wedding date soon.” Something in Mingyu’s heart constricted as he turned back to the couple only a few feet away. There was a pounding of his head like a thought desperate to enter his brain and take it over. And like an idiot, he opened it. 

What are we doing? 

The reporter seemed to be motioned between the two of them, cameras flashing around them. “Let’s see a kiss from the happy couple!”

What the fuck are we doing?

Mingyu looked down when he heard the camera flash. The acidity in his stomach boiled up into his chest, spreading into his throat. He swallowed in hopes it would fall away, but it only burned brighter. His lips tingled, and his mind flashed to their own kiss in the safety of Joshua’s bedroom. In the limits of a bedroom. Never out in public.

How long would those limits stretch? Would Mingyu still be here, in this spot, in twenty years, waiting for Joshua to come visit within those limits? Would they still be sneaking off in closets, interlocking fingers with only one marriage band between them? How long would Namjoo be ‘okay’ with the arrangement? How long would Joshua be okay with the arrangement?

How much longer could Mingyu be okay with this arrangement? He’s now stuck watching this happen right in front of his eyes for the foreseeable future. Watching the heir in front of him kiss his fiancée with the same lips he kisses him with hours later? Why is Jisoo doing this to them all? How long before it crashed and burned and Mingyu was left staring at the burnt rubble of a mess he knew he never should have involved himself in?

I’m smart but very stupid in many ways. I just can’t help myself…

Mingyu felt his body wretch, but he was able to hold it off at the top of his throat. He turned towards the bathroom. I’m going to throw up. 

“Are you okay?” Chan’s voice felt like static in Mingyu’s ears for a moment, until a crisper: “Mingyu-hyung?” made him stand upright. He turned to both Chan and Minghao, who were huddled around him as if he were going to fall over. He felt like he could collapse any minute, but he straightened his posture.

Whatever needed to be done to solve this needed to be done after this. Off the clock. He was at work now. “I’m fine.” he barely choked out. “I’m sorry, I might be… still recovering from my weekend.”

“Oof, yeah that’s fair.” Minghao nodded sympathetically, though he still looked Mingyu over in concern. 

“Mm, but I’m fine.” he assured. “Really. I’m good.” 

Footsteps were heard across the tile and the trio of guards looked over. Junhui was leading the couple away from the camera, and it took every fiber in Mingyu’s being to look towards the thing he was assigned to do: monitor and protect Hong Jisoo. When he looked up, Jisoo was staring back at him, his arm still loose around Namjoo’s waist.

What, are we dating?

Joshua’s question burned in his ears as the couple turned, Jisoo leading the pack. “Let’s go in.” He said simply. And just like Hong Jisoo, Mingyu pushed off on his feet and followed behind, dedicated to putting on the best fucking performance in his life despite the war waging in his body.

Mr. Hong’s office felt much bigger when they were the only two inside the space. He was directed to sit on one of the ornate couches, turning his head as Mr. Hong laid out a large, manila envelope in front of him. He’d been going through it for the past fifteen minutes already, not a pause for breath as he listed all of Mingyu’s new expectations and duties. It wasn’t much of a difference from when he worked other security jobs for the company, when he really thought about it: protect Hong Jisoo from large crowds, shield and protect his public image in the midst of paparazzi, assess situations and potential dangers whenever at events, both public and private, then plan accordingly to keep Jisoo safe. 

They talked about his pay raise, and Mingyu could almost visualize the new coffee machine and the constantly full fridge in his mind as he ran the numbers through his head. He got two days off, though he had to stay on call for one of them in case of emergencies, and he would be working in close rotation with Lee Chan. It all made sense.

But then there was this weekend training bit. That was new.

Mingyu was handed three pages of a document with information on a weekend-long ‘boot camp’ held yearly in the mountains of Pocheon, for all of the personal bodyguards to attend. And it was mandatory, no exceptions. Rumors of that had been spread around Mingyu’s friends over the years, but Mingyu never gave it a second thought. After all, when did he ever think he’d be promoted to personal bodyguard for the Hong’s? 

“Any questions?” Mingyu peered over the paper at Mr. Hong, biting into his lip as he studied the stoic face before him. 

“N-no sir,” he said quickly. “I think I understand it all.”

“Good.” Mr. Hong clapped his hands and rose from his seat. Mr. Park rounded the table and handed Mingyu the full file. “Have that paperwork filled out and returned to Mr. Park by the end of today, so we can get everything situated.” 

“Ah, yes sir.” Mingyu nodded his head. “Thank you again.”

Mr. Hong turned back to look at Mingyu. “Just don’t disappoint me, Mingyu. I didn’t give you this promotion for fun...”

His voice was so sharp and matter-of-fact it could have sliced through Mingyu’s chest. A tingle ran up his spine instead. The door out of the office opened, and Mingyu offered a deep bow. “Of course. Thank you…” He turned on his heel, walking out of the room. The doors closed behind him and he sighed, looking down at the stack of paper in his hands. 

“Lots of work, I see.” Footsteps approached and the stack was lifted out of Mingyu’s hands. Seungcheol offered a smile. “How’d it go?”

“Oh, fine,” he said. “Overall. I just have some paperwork to fill out.”

Seungcheol snorted. “Glad you’re optimistic.”

Mingyu shrugged. “I mean, I don’t want to go in with a negative outlook, or else it’ll be miserable for both of us.” Seungcheol chuckled.

“I mean, you’re now escorting around Hong Jisoo for the foreseeable future. Maybe don’t look at it negatively, but… look at it carefully.” 

“I will.” Mingyu bit the inside of his lip as they headed down the hallway. He shifted. He watched as Joshua’s office door got closer and closer, Chan dutifully perched in the front. He was looking around, and when his eyes fell on Seungcheol and Mingyu, he smiled. For a second, he turned and waved, but when he remembered he was on the clock, he immediately straightened out and nodded his head to the duo. “Hello.” 

“Chan, have you met Mingyu yet?”

“Uh, not properly,” Chan said. “But it’s nice to meet you, Hyung.”

“Ah, you don’t have to call me Hyung.” Mingyu assured. “You’re basically my senior right now, so let’s just call it even and be casual with one another, okay?” Chan nodded his head, his eyes twinkling with the optimism of someone who has barely been beaten down by the capitalistic workforce. How did someone so bright-eyed and bushy tailed get a one-way ticket to Joshua’s bodyguard? He’d have to ask. 

As Seungcheol and Chan were talking, Mingyu peeked through the blinds, into Joshua’s office. He could only see straight ahead, at a monochrome couch and coffee table across from the large, ornate office desk. Perched in the chair was Joshua, being handed papers by his assistant. He tilted his head, watching as Joshua’s eyes immediately flickered away from the paper, lifting towards the commotion going on outside his door. In an instance, their eyes locked and Mingyu had to turn his head back to Seungcheol and Chan. He’d gone just in time for Chan to look back at him.

“Hyung.” He said. “You need to do that weekend training right?”

“Uh, yeah. Did you?” Chan laughed, nodding his head.

“Mhm. It’s basically a snapshot of military boot camp!” Mingyu’s shoulders slumped.

“Why do you look so excited about it? Wasn’t it hard?” 

“No, I kind of enjoyed it.” Chan grinned, flashing most of his teeth. “Besides, if you're strong, you’ll be okay! And it’s kind of worth it.” 

“Yeah, I guess,” Mingyu murmured, turning back towards the window. The office chair was abandoned, and a click of the door pulled the three guards towards it. Mingyu watched as Hong Jisoo looked between the trio and smiled. 

“Am I interrupting something?” Chan fell into a deep bow while Seungcheol just barely hid an eyeroll behind a nod of his own head. Mingyu bowed as well, and when his eyes met Jisoo’s again, they were staring at one another. “Ah, Kim Mingyu.” His eyes were already twinkling. 

Seungcheol looked over his shoulder as Mingyu adjusted. “Hello. I’m looking forward to working with you.”

“The pleasure’s mine,” Jisoo assured. His eyes dropped down to Mingyu’s arms. “How is your arm?”

“Much better,” Mingyu reassured.

“That’s good to hear,” he said. “Congratulations on your promotion.” he lifted his thumb to his lower lip, gently rubbing right at the corner. Mingyu bit the inside of his lip, inhaling a very deep breath. 

“Thank you,” he replied on the exhale, watching as Jisoo smiled. Let’s be real, that was Joshua speaking with his shameless behavior. When Mingyu had to break their gaze for his sanity, he looked at Chan, who was staring at Jisoo like he was the second coming of Jesus Christ. He seemed starstruck at Jisoo. Yeah, he definitely hasn’t been working for him that long. He wondered how long it would be for Chan to look more like…

“Was there somewhere you needed to be, Mr. Hong?” Mingyu looked over at Seungcheol, who couldn’t look more disinterested in his existence if he tried. His arms were in his pockets, and he was standing just lax enough to look comfortable. 

Jisoo’s eyes narrowed just slightly, but his smile remained soft and friendly. “Actually-.” he turned to Junhui. “Can you reschedule the rest of my meetings today? I want to get Mingyu here adjusted to his new position.”

“Oh wow, Sir, you’re so cool.” Chan gushed, covering his mouth. He turned to Seungcheol, who had to close his eyes so he could roll them in peace. Mingyu looked at his feet, shifting them a few times. He knew that Seungcheol was at best aware of what was going on. There was no way he’d just step away and let this go easily. 

Junhui seemed unfazed, nodding his head. “I can push it back to tomorrow, most likely.”

“Excellent.” Jisoo nodded his head. “Thank you.” That was one down, Junhui making his exit down the hall to where his own little office space waited for him. “Now, Chan, you should go home.” He looked over. Chan’s eyes widened. “You came in on your day off today, it’s only fair you get the rest of it to rest. No?”

“Wha- are you sure?” Chan stammered. “I don’t mind-.”

“I know, and I appreciate that,” he motioned to Mingyu. “But Mingyu here won’t learn without experience.” Chan looked over at Mingyu, who only offered a chuckle. He’s way too good at this. 

“Alright, then. If-.” he looked at Seungcheol for one final confirmation. He hesitated, but nodded his head. “Then I’ll see you all tomorrow.” 

“See you tomorrow, Chan. Eat well tonight.” He waved off the second warm body as it headed down the hallway and towards the elevator. His eyes then fell to Seungcheol. “He’s a good kid.”

That must have been genuine because Seungcheol’s face softened, and he nodded. “He is. Now… It’s  best that I stay around until Mingyu finishes his training this weekend.”

Joshua clicked his tongue. Seungcheol would not be as easy of a nut to crack as Junhui or Chan. “Oh, no.” he said. “You won’t be needed. You have many more important things to do.”

“Well, today this is important.” His eyes darted in Mingyu’s direction for a brief second. Joshua chuckled. 

“Wow, you really are so dedicated to your staff, Seungcheol.” The comment was dripping with passive aggressiveness. 

“Someone has to look out for them,” he insisted. The duo continued to bicker, Mingyu’s eyes bouncing between the both of them. He knew that Seungcheol was trying to keep them from doing anything stupid, especially on the clock. Knowing that was already a box checked off for them, he could only bite his tongue. 

Just as the duo's bickering continued, Seungcheol’s walkie-talkie came to life. He sighed, pulling it out and pressing it to his lips. “Yes?”

Mingyu’s eyes flickered to Joshua, who met them with a confident glint in his eye. He’d won this battle, even if Seungcheol didn’t realize it yet. Mingyu held back his smile, held back the way his eyes dipped back down to his lips, where Joshua had wiped his finger along. God, he really was shameless. “Perfect timing, hm?” Joshua cooed, eyes falling back to Seungcheol’s scowl. 

Seungcheol sighed as he pocketed his walkie. “I’ll be right back,” he said. “Stay here.” His eyes snapped to Mingyu. “Don’t go outside of this building, do you understand?” 

“Y-yes Sir.” Mingyu watched Seungcheol start down the hallway with one more warning look over his shoulder. He gulped, but had no time to worry about Seungcheol when Joshua tapped a few times on the door to claim his attention. He was already back inside, blocking him from prying eyes outside as he coaxed Mingyu in with one finger. And who was Mingyu to refuse? 

Mingyu closed the door as he stepped in, locking it behind him. Joshua immediately closed the distance, reaching over and tugging the blinds down by their strings. Mingyu looked down at Joshua as he immediately leaned in to kiss him. Mingyu’s hands cupped his cheeks, eagerly returning the kiss as he tugged Joshua up against him, removing all of the leftover and unneeded space. Mingyu could feel the doorknob pressing into his back, so he shifted them, pressing Joshua against the wall to the side, earning an amused chuckle against his lips that was swallowed down in a kiss.

Despite his initiation of the kissing, Joshua was the first one to pull away, keeping their lips just a breath apart. Mingyu exhaled, leaning down to catch one more kiss.

“You need to work,” he suggested.

“I am working,” he teased, squeezing one of Mingyu’s arms. “It’s very important.”

“Mmm, I’m sure it is.” Mingyu chuckled, pulling back fully as he reached up to fix his hair. “Come on, you need to at least do something productive today.”

“Coming in is the productive thing,” Joshua said, poking at Mingyu’s chest as he passed by. He went over to his desk, plopping down on the chair enough to spin around a bit, towards the large window to the right. Mingyu looked up at it too, scanning the other tall buildings around them reaching into the sky. 

“Am I supposed to stay here while you work?” he asked. Joshua flicked open his computer.

“Yeongi was told to always wait outside for me, even if I wasn’t planning on going anywhere. That’s what Chan was doing before you came, so I assume it’ll be the same.” Mingyu nodded. “It’s supposed to be for if I sneak off, at least that’s what I’ve always assumed.”

Mingyu chuckled. “You sneak off?” he teased.

“Me? No, never.” Joshua’s fingers typed for a few minutes. “But you’re free to hang around here, if you want.” 

“What if I distract you?” Mingyu asked, already wandering towards the bookshelves on the other side of the office. He only got a soft chuckle in response, and the room fell quiet. The clacking of the keyboard and Mingyu’s footsteps were the only two sounds in the office for at least the next twenty minutes. Mingyu’s eyes scanned the different books and binders that lined the shelves. They were all thick, neutral-colored spines. All of them ranged from the history of the company’s finances and reports to general books regarding business practices and statistics. Reports, numbers. Mingyu wasted no time cracking one of them open, and immediately skimming the documents inside. He always had an easy time memorizing the equations inside his textbooks, each sticking to a different part of his brain like glue once his eyes skimmed over it. 

“You cannot seriously be reading that.” Joshua was looking over his computer by now, curious to what Mingyu was doing. Still holding the box, Mingyu walked over.

“I like this kind of stuff.” He said. Joshua arched an eyebrow, scoffing. 

“Right, I forgot you’re a nerd.”

“Hey, now.” Mingyu pouted. “What, were you some kind of slacker?”

“Do you think slackers get their Master’s in Business Administration?” Mingyu looked over Joshua’s head to where all of his college degrees were hung up in ornate frames. He rounded the desk to get a better look. They were all earned at Yonsei University, his name written right across the middle with the school’s logo and year printed beside it. 

“Wow. That’s incredible, Hyung.” Mingyu turned his head towards Joshua, and for a minute, his body stilled. Mingyu watched as Joshua clicked through a handful of files, but none of them had business terms or reports on them. None of them contained information on the company or any formal writing. It looks like a collection of photos of different Korean women, some of whom had large ‘X’s over their faces. Lots of locations spread out on a map of the United States, California specifically, were marked with red dots, some of which connected to the pictures. Mingyu couldn’t help it, curiosity got the better of him, and he leaned forward a bit more. “What is that?”

Within a second, Joshua tensed, the finger on the mouse instinctively clicking away. “What was what?” he asked, his head whipping around immediately. Mingyu flinched, watching as Joshua’s eyes narrowed. 

“Nothing,” he said quickly. When Mingyu looked back up at the screen, Joshua’s work email was up, about 40 unreal emails trying to capture his attention. “Nothing, I’m sorry.”

Joshua blinked, turning to the computer again. He instantly clicked the computer closed, and pushed his chair back to stand up. “Let’s go out.”

“Pardon?” Mingyu leaned forward, watching as Joshua was already heading towards the door. “Hyu-” the door opened. “Sir.”

“What?” he looked over. “I want to get lunch.”

“Then we should wait for Junhui-hyung, or Seungcheol-hyung-.”

Joshua shook his head, that same defensive look still in his eye. “Don’t worry. We’ll honestly be back before anyone even notices we’re gone. Junhui will be rescheduling my week for the next two hours and Seungcheol won’t come back. He’s dumb, not stupid.” 

“But-.”

“Fine, I’ll go myself, then.” And he started down the hall. Mingyu huffed, and taking another glance around the office, he ultimately began jogging after Joshua, pulling into a full sprint to his side before the duo reached the elevator. He caught sight of a smirk forming on Joshua’s face. “Good. Now, I know the best way to go if we want to get out and back in a short time without people noticing.”

Mingyu cocked an eyebrow. “So, you do sneak out.” He asked, and Joshua only laughed. 

---------------

Mingyu looked around the “small” cafe as Joshua led him inside, trailing behind the hostess to a table in the far back of the building. The hostess led them to a sliding door, motioning inside to a large, ornate table in the room. Mingyu looked around, nodding to the woman as she excused herself. With the two of them alone, Joshua turned his head. “Sit.” he said to Mingyu.

“Oh, I don’t-.”

“I’m taking you out as a welcome present.” Joshua insisted, taking his own seat. “So don’t worry.” He motioned across the table. “Just come sit. Besides, I already booked the reservation for two people.”

Mingyu sighed, walking over and taking his seat. He looked across the fancy table, at the centerpiece in the middle ,and the expensive paintings hung up on the walls. When the waiter came in, Joshua immediately ordered the most expensive bottle of wine on the menu and the most expensive dishes, along with multiple sides. Mingyu rang the price up in his head as the order was repeated back to the couple, and the zeroes almost wrapped completely around his brain. Joshua sipped his drink, eyes falling to Mingyu.

“You look stiff.” He said.

“Well, Seungcheol-hyung said-.”

“What have I told you about Seungcheol?” Joshua leaned forward. “What? If he says that we left the building, then he’s going to get in trouble for not keeping an eye on you. He’s not going to do that.” Mingyu sighed. “Don’t let yourself get worried by all of that. Okay?” He tilted his head. “I reserved this nice spot because nobody will bother us.” He kicked one leg over the other. “It’s almost like we’re on a date.”

“A date?” Mingyu’s heart was constricted. Joshua nodded. “You want to go on a date with me?”

Joshua licked his bottom lip, nodding his head. Mingyu had to squint a bit but he could have sworn he saw the hints of pink on Joshua’s cheeks. “I’ve thought about going on a date with you pretty often.” He said. “It was harder before when you were just building security…”

“Ah…” Mingyu shifted, his shoulders getting looser as he studied Joshua. He rested his chin in his hand. “Well, you certainly picked a nice spot for a date then, Hyung.” Joshua’s smile softened a bit as Mingyu pointed to the painting behind them. “This is incredible.”

“The food here is good too,” Joshua said as he reached for his drink. “It’s one of the smaller places I like to go to eat.”

“Smaller?!” Mingyu’s eyes widened. “This room alone is the size of my living room!” Joshua laughed as he took a sip of his drink. 

“It is.” He agreed. “But to me, it’s small.”

“So my living room is small.”

“Of course, it is. My bathroom is the size of your living room, Mingyu.” 

“Y’know-.” Mingyu said with a shy laugh. “I believe that.” 

“You’ll get to see soon enough. Our bodyguards meet us at our home every morning.”

“I know, I was told.” Mingyu said as he finally took a long sip of his drink. “I was also told about the training that I need to do.”

“Ah.” Joshua’s eyebrows raised. “Right, that. Have fun~.”

“Is it that bad?” Mingyu frowned.

“Well.” Joshua twirled his fork in his hands as he thought about the question. “Yeongi was my bodyguard since I was a kid so I don’t really remember him saying anything about it. Chan only did it about six months ago, and he said it was enjoyable. But he might be a freak or something.”

“That’s a long time.” Mingyu mused. “I feel bad he got fired.”

“Hah, I don’t,” Joshua said. When he saw Mingyu’s shocked expression, Joshua shifted in his seat. “He was my bodyguard for almost 20 years, but it was like my father was breathing down my neck even if we weren’t in the same space. He didn’t work for me; he wasn’t loyal to me. He was loyal to my father.” Joshua shrugged, and Mingyu frowned when he saw unsure eyes flicker off to the side. “Which I suppose is the job, but–.”

“His job is to protect you,” Mingyu said quickly. “So that must have been frustrating; having him always at your side but not on it.”

Joshua’s lips puckered into a small smile. “That was corny.”

“Was it?” Mingyu laughed when Joshua sealed his statement with a firm nod. “Sorry.” 

Corny as they may be, Joshua seemed to take the words Mingyu said in with a lot more thought than he’d expected. He ran his finger along the rim of his glass, lips tightly pressed together. After a quiet minute, Joshua spoke up again. “I’m sure my father gave you a lot of rules, hm?”

“Many. I almost can’t remember them all.” Mingyu said. Joshua’s eyes finally lifted back to Mingyu.

“You’ll catch on quickly,” Joshua assured. “You’re smart. Just pay attention, do what I ask, and be loyal…” his finger slowed on the rim of his glass. “That’s all.”

A smile graced Mingyu’s face, and he nodded his head. “I can do that.” 

“To me first,” Joshua added.

The doors opened then, making Joshua look over just in time for three waiters to bring in multiple trays of various foods. Mingyu stared ahead as Joshua’s eyes lit up a bit, sitting up straighter and thanking the workers in his public persona voice. Joshua looked over at him, and Mingyu nodded: “Too you first, okay?”

Joshua’s eyes twinkled a bit, and as he motioned for Mingyu to start eating and not waste anything, his smile widened just a bit more. 

--------------

Mingyu leaned back in his seat, rubbing his neck as he let out a deep, almost pained groan. “Man.” he huffed. “I cannot remember the last time I’ve ever eaten this much.”

“And you’re not even done.” Joshua teased. Mingyu cracked an eye open as Joshua popped a bite of kimchi into his own mouth. He took another bite into his chopsticks and stood up, leaning over the table. “Come on,” he said, reaching his hand out.

“I dunno if I can eat anymo-.”

“But it’s going to go to waste if you don’t.” Joshua teased. 

“Then you eat it.”

“I eat this all the time.” Joshua laughed. “Come on, I ordered it for you to try.” Mingyu’s pout morphed into an amused grin as the chopsticks were stuck in his direction. Finally, he leaned over, opening his mouth a bit as Joshua fed him the kimchi. “There you go.” Satisfied, he sat back down. 

Mingyu wiped his mouth as he groaned at the delicious kimchi he’d eaten. “I cannot believe rich people eat like this every day.”

“It’s not as amazing as you make it seem.”

“When you live off instant rice and soups a lot of the time, then yes, it certainly does.” Mingyu corrected. 

“You sound like you grew up practically homeless.”

“Well, no.” Mingyu said. “But my father was a bit tight with money, especially after it became just the three of us in the house.” Mingyu paused when a jammed key attempted to twist in his heart. “So we didn’t go out to eat much, and he made sure to stretch all the food in the house until the very last drop. So, he taught me how to be resourceful with food.” he motioned to the majority of leftovers scattered on the table. “And not do this.” 

Joshua laughed, head falling to the side. “I’m eating,” he said, reaching for another bite of pork.

“It maybe wasn’t the fanciest, but the best place I ever went out to eat was probably this really good shop by our old house. It was run by a family friend of my dad, so we got a lot of discounts. They make some of the best kimchi jjigae I think I’ve ever eaten.” Joshua nodded his head as he listened, and Mingyu’s eyes lit up with excitement. “It’s close to the apartment, too. I’ll have to take you sometime.”

Joshua snorted. “Sure,” he said as he swallowed. “You can take me.”

“You don’t sound very excited.” Mingyu pointed out. “What if I want to take you on a date, too?”

“I didn’t say you couldn’t,” Joshua replied, eyes widening a bit. Mingyu huffed, smiling a bit across the table. Joshua watched him, before lifting his hand and laying it open across the table. He watched Mingyu’s eyebrows furrow in confusion, so he replied: “You’re supposed to hold hands on a date.”

Mingyu replied by stuffing a large bite of pork into his mouth, covering it with his hand. Joshua couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t know…” Mingyu choked out when he swallowed. “If that’s smart. What if the waitress-.”

“We can let go when the door opens.” Joshua pointed out. He shifted, and his arm extended with him. “Besides, aren’t you worried the waitress might start flirting with me? I mean she’s practically been eyeing me all afternoon.”

Mingyu scoffed, rolling his eyes. “I think I’ll be okay, Hyung.” 

Joshua pouted, but ultimately pulled his hand away, with a simple: “Suit yourself.” So Mingyu did, and he took another bite of food. “So much for being full.”

“I told you, I was raised to clean my plate.” Just then, the waitress returned, smiling sweetly at the duo. Joshua perked up a bit, and Mingyu watched him almost flaunt himself to her. Was he trying to make Mingyu jealous? Mingyu couldn’t help but smile softly. Idiot…

The waitress turned to Mingyu, and he immediately noticed a flush on her cheeks. She bit her lip, but immediately spoke in her usual customer service voice: “Can I take any of these plates away?” 

“Oh-.” Mingyu looked over to Joshua, watching in real time as his eyes widened and his mouth fell open. Long fingers curled around the glass as Mingyu began passing over plates. “Here, sure. Thank you so much.” The waitress reached down and took a small handful, and Mingyu noticed the way she smiled as their fingers brushed together in the process. Twice. “Everything was delicious.”

“Thank you,” she said with a polite yet quick nod of her head. She turned to Joshua to do the same, but both noticed how she didn’t leave the room fully until she offered some more giddy look in Mingyu’s direction. He chuckled, nodding his head to her as she closed the door behind herself.

“That was cu-.” A sudden thud slammed against his knee, and Mingyu groaned. “Augh!” A hand reached down to cover the throbbing part of his leg. He cracked an eye open to see Joshua reach across, interlocking Mingyu’s free hand with his own. Examining his face, Joshua wasn’t looking at him. His eyes were locked on the door, chin resting in his elbow and his fingers splayed out across his cheeks. That didn’t do anything to hide the sudden flames of red painted all over his face, over his nose and touching his ears. Mingyu looked down at their interlocked hands and smiled. “Hyung…” 

“On the clock,” Joshua grumbled, pouting even more. 

Mingyu bit back his grin. “Sir, are you jealous?” 

“What!?” He looked over, eyes narrowing. “Of who?!”

Mingyu bit back a laugh. “Of the waitress!” 

“No! Tsk, no. Of course not. Jeez, you think I’m worried about you, that I’m jealous of other people.” He shook his head, but the grip on Mingyu’s hand tightened. “You’re so full of yourself, Kim Mingyu.” 

Mingyu chuckled, returning the squeeze of their hands before reaching for another bite of food to eat. 

It took a few tries, but Mingyu was able to perfect eating with one hand for the rest of the meal.  

---------------

The ride back to the office was quiet up until the first red light pulled them to a stop. Mingyu was rubbing his hands on the wheel, looking around at people passing in the streets and cars stopping and starting all around them. Maybe it was because he didn’t technically start his first day, but it really did feel like the two of them were on a date today. Something fluttered in his chest and his fingers wrapped around the wheel.

“You know.” Joshua’s voice called Mingyu’s attention as it always did, and he looked over to see him shift in the passenger’s seat. “I didn’t plan on seeing you. At the banquet…”

Mingyu blinked. “Really?” He asked. “Why did you then?”

“The entire plan I had - because I made a plan -.” Joshua finally lolled his head to look at Mingyu, a playful smile on his face. “-Was to look so good in my suit knowing you couldn’t do anything about it.” His lips pursed together. “But that didn’t happen, so….” he shrugged. “Yeah. I dunno. I probably shouldn’t have given up so quickly.”

The light turned green and Mingyu pulled forward. “Why?” he asked, eyes trained on the road. Joshua was silent now; Mingyu could see him fiddling with his hands from the corner of his eye. Joshua seemed like he was really contemplating what he was going to say next. It was out of character for him. Fingers tightening on the wheel, Mingyu turned on the blinker and merged to the side, pulling off the road. Joshua looked over when Mingyu turned the car off.

“What are you doing?” he asked, eyes meeting Mingyu as they both turned in their seats. 

“You didn’t answer my question.” Mingyu’s voice was soft. Joshua chuckled, opening his mouth to speak, but Mingyu was quicker: “Don’t be smart with me…” he pleaded. 

Joshua seemed shocked at the request, but ultimately he said: “You wouldn’t have gotten hurt.” The delivery was deadpan, factual, but Mingyu could see the glimmer of guilt in Joshua’s eyes. It was foreign, most likely never truly allowed to come to the forefront of his gaze. Mingyu exhaled, eyes softening as he reached out and untangled Joshua’s hands from one another, wrapping them inside his own. 

“Well, I wouldn’t have gotten this promotion either, you know.” He said simply. Joshua looked at their interlocked hands when something in Mingyu’s head snapped. 

“Hyung…” he said. “Were you upset because of what happened with your mo- uh, Mrs. Hong?” 

Joshua didn’t respond; he didn’t have to. His eyes diverted away from Mingyu’s direction and his heart shattered. “Ah.” Immediately, Mingyu’s head fell in a deep bow, his forehead almost touching their interlocked hands. 

“Wh-what are you doing?” Joshua stammered. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

“It, what, you-.” Joshua stammered a solid five incoherent words before finally coughing into his hand. “...Yeah, you know what, you better.” He said. “It was out of pocket.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I didn’t mean to upset you.” He felt Joshua moving in his seat, but still kept his eyes on the road. Finally, one of his hands wiggled from their grasp before pressing against Mingyu’s forehead, straightening out. When he was pushed upright, Joshua was looking out the window. 

“Just forget it and drive.” His voice was softer now. Mingyu nodded, and within a few seconds, the car roared to life and pulled back into the street. Joshua shifted in his seat, he almost seemed uncomfortable. Mingyu almost felt guilty, which he didn’t expect would come from the apology. Just as he was about to open his mouth again, Joshua beat him to the punch: “When you said at lunch that it ‘just became the three of you’... what did you mean?”

Mingyu let the question hang in the air between them for a second, now being the one to shift uncomfortably in his seat. Another red light and Mingyu slowed the car to a stop, allowing himself to take a deep breath. “Uhm, well…” he looked over at Joshua. “My mom left us when I was about 9.” 

Joshua’s head whipped around, eyes slightly wider. “Really?” Mingyu nodded, and Joshua fixed his reaction to one of neutrality. “Oh, uh… oh…”

“Yeah. It’s a long story,  I don’t really remember her much anyway. She wasn’t really around before then, either.” Mingyu’s eyes flickered to the red light and the people passing through the street. “Sometimes I wonder if I would recognize her if she was just someone walking in the street, you know?”

Joshua almost looked out the front window at the people crossing the walkway, his eyes scanning the assembly line of people in front of them. “Yeah, I know.” he said. He leaned forward. “Are you angry at her?”

“Angry? Sometimes. I think I was most angry when my father got sick and died because then it was just me and Minyeong.” he nodded. “My father used to tell me she wanted more than he could give her on his salary. But that never made sense to me. My father was tight with money but he made sure we always got the things we asked for.” He chuckled softly, nostalgia in his tone. “Well, when we asked.”

“Oh…” Joshua said. 

“I assume then… that is the same for you?” Mingyu asked. Joshua pursed his lips together. “I realized when we first met like this, that I know almost nothing about your family.”

Joshua nodded his head. “Don’t feel bad about that or anything. It’s meant to be that way.” he leaned back in his seat, lolling his head out the window. “The world only knows what they need too.”

Mingyu thought back to the document littered with photos, markers and names and how quickly Joshua worked to hide it from Mingyu’s vision. He couldn’t put the full picture together with just a few seconds of a document he wasn’t meant to see. But he had a feeling. “Was that document–.”

“Yes,” he said quickly, like he wanted the conversation to end sooner rather than later. “I don’t know much about her, so I can’t say anything else. I don’t know if she’s dead or alive. I don’t know anything.” He stressed the last word like a knife was plunged in his chest when he said it. “The woman who brought me into this world and I’m not allowed to know anything about her, no matter how much I ask….” He shrugged, but it didn’t seem so nonchalant. “And yet the world keeps on turning as if she didn’t exist in the first place.” 

“That’s crazy…”

“You’re telling me.” Joshua hummed. “No social media accounts, no public profiles. I don’t even know her name. Any articles about her are almost thirty years old. They were never transferred onto the Internet so a lot of the information is lost. And anyone in the company who does know anything isn’t allowed to tell me.” 

“How long have you been trying to find out about her?”

“Since I was maybe 15?” he asked. “My friend Jeonghan goes to California sometimes, and has managed some connections. But even then, we don’t have anything to go on, so there’s only so much I can do now….”

Mingyu opened his mouth, but the light turned green. So, he stepped on the gas and started down the street, past the people waiting on the sidewalk. There was nothing else he could say about a topic Joshua didn’t want to talk about. So, he didn’t. He simply reached his hand out, blindly palming for Joshua’s. “...What are you doing?” Joshua asked. 

Mingyu finally found one of Joshua’s hands back on his lap, and he quickly enveloped it on his own, bringing it to rest on the middle console. Joshua’s fingers tensed momentarily, but he ultimately curled his own fingers around Mingyu’s. “Now you want to hold my hand?” he asked, and Mingyu chuckled at the hint of a tease in his voice. 

“Yeah,” Mingyu said. “We’re technically still on a date, you know.”

“Oh, are we?” Joshua mused. 

“Mhm. I’d consider talking about yourself so intimately as very important for a good date.”

“So this was a good date?” Joshua’s fingers once again tightened around Mingyu’s. He responded with an equally fond squeeze. 

“Yeah,” he said. “It was.” They were silent for a minute before Mingyu said. “But mine will be better.”

“I highly doubt that!” Joshua retorted, almost offended. “My date was delicious. And on company time, so you got paid. You’re welcome.” 

Mingyu laughed, lifting Joshua’s hand up to press a kiss to the back. “Right. Okay. Well, just you wait and see, then.”

“Fine. I will.” Joshua huffed, turning his head back to stare out the window. Mingyu offered him one little glance as he continued driving, a fond smile on his face at the reflection he was able to catch in the mirror. As the pair drove in silence, Mingyu thought back to the document littered with information. With unknowns, with dead ends, with questions that may never get answered. Mingyu had made closure with the loss of his parents a long time ago, but it seemed Joshua was still in limbo on whether he had anything to mourn at all. He had so many questions himself, he wanted to peel Joshua apart and examine every layer of his brain, mind, and soul like some convoluted math problem only he could find the answer to. 

Like any good problem, Mingyu knew the solution would be satisfying when he got there. And he had plenty more dates ahead to look forward to.

The air was quiet for a long, unbreathable minute as the pair stared at one another. Seungcheol seemed to have a lot to say despite not opening his mouth. Joshua looked down the halls, motioning with his hand into his office. “Come in…” Seungcheol closed the door behind him, turning just as Joshua rested his hips against his desk. “I can’t remember the last time you snuck off to see me.”

“Don’t start.” Seungcheol frowned. “I’m not here to amuse you.”

“I can see that.” Joshua arched an eyebrow. “So, what are you here for?” 

Joshua watched as Seungcheol’s chest expanded with a deep breath before he spoke: “You can’t do this again.”

“Do what?” Joshua asked behind a confused laugh. 

“Don’t act dumb.” Seungcheol’s voice sharpened. “You know what I’m talking about. I saw how you were acting with Kim Mingyu. I know what’s going on.”

Joshua’s amused smile fell then and he straightened his posture a bit. “And?”

“Leave him alone.”

Joshua barked out a laugh, covering his mouth as he looked away. “You’re kidding me, right?”

“No. I know how you are.”

“You certainly do.” His eyes swiped Seungcheol’s body, and saw the way his ears dusted a little pinker. “What do you think is going on?”

“Oh, please. It couldn’t be more obvious if you put a sign on the front of the company building.” He put his hands in his pockets. “Don’t do this to him.”

“Do what?” Joshua stressed again, a grin still on his face. “Please, tell me what I’m doing!” 

“You know what you’re doing!” 

Joshua’s smile faltered a bit, but he still kept his eyebrows raised, a challenging look on his face. “Oh, do I?” he asked. “What? Are you jealous?”

Now it was Seungcheol’s turn to laugh, rolling his eyes. “You wish.”

“Not anymore.” he assured. “Trust me, that ship has sailed.” 

“That doesn’t mean you’re any different.

“Neither are you.” Joshua snapped, tilting his head. “You’re just as much of a coward as you always are, you won’t even come out and say what you’re talking about.”

“Tsk, okay you want me to fucking say it?” Seungcheol stepped a bit closer, and Joshua’s eyes flickered up to him. “You’re risking his entire career for your own gratification! You don’t give a shit about what this kind of relationship will do to him if anyone finds out about it.”

“So? Gonna tell?” Joshua’s eyes burned with the dare. “Then you’ll really prove you’re just jealous! What? You got a good cushy job, and you’re still unsatisfied? Psh, you’re a piece of work.” 

“Me a piece of work? I bet you my entire yearly salary that you never really told him why you do what you do, no matter who it hurts.” 

“Please, I don’t need your measly hundred dollar paycheck, alright?” Joshua sneered, crossing his arms over his chest. He stepped forward now, the closeness between them familiar yet the burning rage a new aspect. “What I do is none of your business, Choi Seungcheol. Not anymore.” 

“Well it is as long as you’re fucking around with one of my guys. Mingyu’s a good kid, he needs this job-.”

“I know.” Joshua said.

“Do you?” he hissed. “You’re lucky nobody said anything when you insisted he took you to the parking garage despite having two of the best security guards in this company at your beck and call! Are you going to be the one to keep his family’s head afloat if he loses his job?” Joshua opened his mouth, but Seungcheol stepped closer, smushing that boiling rage even tighter against the both of them. “Or will he not be of any interest to you at that point?” 

“I know what I’m doing.” he said. “Unlike you, I know how to handle problems when they arise. I don’t go running with my tail between my legs at the first sign of things being hard. And neither does Mingyu.”

“No, he’s not. But he’s also not fucking stupid,” he said. “When he does find out how selfish you really are, he’ll go running for the hills. I just hope he has a job to come back to when he wakes the hell up.” Seungcheol shook his head. 

“...Is that all?” Joshua huffed. Seungcheol looked Joshua over for a long while. “I thought you said you didn’t come here to amuse me.” 

“Tch.” Seungcheol locked his jaw, shaking his head. “You’re fucking unbelieveable, Joshua.” A flicker of a pause. “Oh, sorry.” He sneered. “Hong Jisoo.” He watched as Joshua’s eyes darkened. “Since you really don’t seem to give a damn about Mingyu at all since you’re stringing him along like this and don’t give a damn about the consequences your selfishness will have on his future, it doesn’t shock me about the bullshit you pulled at the banquet. He never would have gotten hurt if it weren’t for your selfishness.”

Joshua blinked, his smile finally falling. Seungcheol took a few steps back, his jaw still tight and his eyes still burning with the rage that had seeped into his bones. However, when there were footsteps heard at the door, Seungcheol nodded his head and turned on his heel, exiting the room just as Junhui had returned with a little bag of snacks and drinks. 

Junhui looked over as Joshua sat down in his chair again. “Everything alright?” 

Joshua nodded, resting his hand in his chin. “Yes.” he said. Before looking at the snacks he was brought, Joshua pulled up his phone messages, one in particular. 

[Joshua]: Don’t be out of work long.

Sent 48hrs ago

---------------

Mingyu had spent the past week on a paid leave through the company, nursing his injury and attending a few physical therapy sessions per the doctor’s orders to make sure none of the muscles were heavily damaged. It was a company under the Hong umbrella, so he really wasn’t that far from work if he thought about it hard enough. His sister had taken a few days off work despite his request not to. She was insistent that she wanted to be there and help him if he needed to, but he assumed she wanted an excuse to take a few days off of school. 

The vacation was nice overall; he still woke up early but had time to go on longer runs and do more intense workouts in the house. He took a lot of naps and lounged around watching TV with his sister. He couldn’t remember the last time he had, well, time on his hands like this. By the fourth day, though, he was itching to get back to work. 

Newspapers and social media were all over the robbery, the apprehension, and the company’s heir being sent to the hospital for a twisted ankle after being horrifically attacked trying to protect his car! Mingyu couldn’t roll his eyes anymore if he tried. On top of the ‘injury’ Joshua had - which Mingyu still felt terribly guilty about - his face and name were plastered on the articles and news reports as well. The story of how he saved Joshua and got injured in the process in order to apprehend the criminal. He should be pleased with himself, trying to act humble as the old ladies at the local grocery store congratulated him on his bravery and insisted he would be rewarded in the future. But he couldn’t help but feel unsure, specifically of what his first day back at work would bring.

When the week was up, Mingyu was on the morning bus once again and headed into the unknown. The second he got inside, Hansol and Jiwoong were at his sides, Hansol lifting up his bandaged arm to look at it. “Hyung, can I see it?”

“What, no? Freak.” Mingyu snorted, yanking his arm away. Wonwoo nudged him.

“How was your week off?”

“Good.” Mingyu smiled. 

“Just good? You almost lost an arm and it’s just good?” Wonwoo’s eyes widened behind his glasses.

“Who said I almost lost an arm? It didn’t even slice me horizontally to cut my arm off. People are so dramatic.” Mingyu walked over to his locker, flinging it open and tossing his belongings inside. Hansol and Jiwoong were still asking questions, Jiwoong moreso, while Hansol just nodded along and stared directly into Mingyu’s soul for answers. Mingyu didn’t ever have little brothers, but he assumed it would be something like this. “Guys, it’s really nothing spectacular.”

“It kind of is,” Jiwoong said.

“I mean what the hell were you doing with Hong Jisoo anyway?” Hansol finally piped up. Mingyu’s hand on his locker tightened, and he looked over at the others. That was one thing the news sources couldn’t really say anything about. Mingyu wasn’t Joshua’s normal bodyguard, but there was nothing said about why it was him with Joshua rather than Chan or Yeongi. Mingyu didn’t know if that was good or bad for him and Joshua, but he did know it was going to make all future conversations about this very uncomfortable.

“Uh, well-.”

The door to the staff room opened and the group turned to see Seungcheol there. He already looked exhausted, most likely scrambling to fill Mingyu’s shoes while he was gone. He said his good mornings as he approached Mingyu specifically. “How’s your arm?” he asked.

“Oh. It’s alright, thanks.” He assured. Seungcheol looked him over, crossing his arms over his chest. “...What did you need?” he asked curiously. 

Seungcheol motioned out the door. “Come with me for a minute.” He said. Mingyu blinked, looking between the others. He was only offered confused shrugs as he jogged after Seungcheol and let the door swing shut behind him. 

--------------------

“Alright, sit down.” Seungcheol motioned to the seat across from his desk as he took his own. Mingyu sank down, looking around the small office. Seungcheol leaned back in his seat, running a hand through his hair. 

“How was your week off?” 

“Ah… it was fine, considering,” Mingyu said. “Spent most of it with Minyeong.”

“How’s she doing?”

“Fine.”

“Good.” Seungcheol nodded his head. Mingyu could see Seungcheol’s wheels turning. The suspense was killing him, and ever since this entire incident occurred, Mingyu was sick and tired of feeling on edge. 

“Hyung, what’s-.”

“I’m going to ask you one question.” Seungcheol’s voice was firm, steady. He felt like he was about to be lectured by his father for something. It shook him to his core, heavy anxiety and eerie nostalgia tangling into his body. “Please…. Please, Mingyu, don’t lie to me.”

Mingyu swallowed hard, nodding his head. “Yes, of course…” he said softly. His fingers curled into the fabric of his pants. 

“What is going on with Hong Jisoo?”

Mingyu felt as if all of his brain cells had gotten into a pile-up car crash, out of commission for the foreseeable future. His mouth ran dry, but his hands were sweaty, and his heart rate picked up like he was running double his usual speed on the treadmill. “W-what?” was all he managed to get out.

Seungcheol groaned, head falling back against his chair. He covered his face. “Mingyu….” He leaned forward again. “I know something is going on.”

“H-how?” he asked. Wait, not a good question. “I mean why? Why would you think-?” 

“I have eyes. You’re lucky I’m the first person to bring the banquet up to you like this.” he said. “Come on, now, what do you think I am?”

Mingyu stammered. “...Pissed?”

Seungcheol chuckled, shaking his head. “Mingyu, listen to me…” his voice was softer now, treading away from the stern lecture tone and to a more comforting one. It did nothing to ease Mingyu’s worries. “Whatever is going on isn’t my business, I know.” he began. “But I need to understand the risks of having it continue. Whatever it is…”

“I-...” Mingyu looked away, wringing his hands together. How could he lie? Should he even bother trying? The entire show Joshua put on at the banquet, he’s lucky the entire building isn’t gossiping about that, too distracted by the crime at hand. Mingyu couldn’t help but wonder how intentional that actually was. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I need you to understand something, okay? Joshua Hong is not someone you want to fuck around with…” Seungcheol inhaled. “Physically or metaphorically or whatever. You don’t want to get involved with him, not like this.” 

Joshua Hong. Mingyu’s heart had begun beating so fast he almost couldn’t feel it in his chest anymore. His eyes were burning and like he could start crying at any moment. Behind his closed eyes, he pictured a tall, muscular, dark-haired figure with tanned skin and a lopsided smile behind a lit cigarette as his stoic voice hit Mingyu’s ears. 

If you used your head at the time instead of your heart, then it was the right decision.

Could he really say he did that now? When everything was going to crumble around him like he knew it would when he asked Joshua up for coffee that first night? 

“Mingyu.” Seungcheol caught his attention again. His eyes were a bit wide, and he quickly passed over a tissue. “Hey, woah. I’m not trying to get you in trouble.” Mingyu took the tissue. His eyes were stinging but dry, and he tried his hardest to keep it that way. “I’m just trying to warn you. Joshua Hong, Hong Jisoo, whatever the hell he makes you call him, you’re way too good for him. He’s nothing but trouble, even if he’s rich and charismatic. You can’t risk everything on him.”

Setting the tissue on his lap, Mingyu nodded his head. “I know,” he said. 

“Then why? You’re smarter than this.”

“I tried,” Mingyu admitted. “I tried so hard to keep it far away.” He looked down at his hands, watching as his fingers shook a bit. He bit his lip so hard it stung, inhaling the rest of the would-be tears back into his eyes before they fell. “I can’t help myself though…” he said. “I’m smart yet very stupid in many ways, too.” A hand ran through his hair, and he couldn’t help but feel another softer hand raking through it instead. “I just can’t help myself.”

When he met Seungcheol’s gaze again, it was still soft, but there was a new glint of pity in his gaze. Like he was mourning the person sitting in front of him. Seungcheol opened his mouth a handful of times before finally leaning back in his chair.