Toast

I am shamed to say this and this probably gets me cancelled but I'd literally spent my entire life thinking rasputin song was about vladimir putin. like every time I listened to the song / every time I heard it play, I literally thought it was about vladimir putin 😭😭😭😭

call my posts bunnies🐇 the way they flop

one time i went through the taco bell drive thru and when i tried to order a baja blast i said “mountain boo bah” and then i just left. couldn’t recover

a friend of mine once went to order a beefy bean and cheese burrito but ordered a “beedo beedo” instead and i think of it every time i go to taco bell

maid engineered in a lab to sweep without a broom

cums all my cum in a shotgun blast like that's normal to do

cocks my cock and it very audibly makes all the mechanical clicks and chunks you'd expect because it's normal

cocks my cock and a spent casing falls from behind my balls

my break-action cock with two barrels (shark-style) that can cum twice or once really powerfully but then i have to snap it at the base to reload and it sounds really painful

did you know its national moth week? Happy national moth week!