When Sirius steps in a cammy little coffee shop for his dare, he has no clue what will hit him.
James view on how Sirius and Remus got together in this Universe.
The bright side of locking yourself out
Rating T, 1979 words
The door fell shut behind me while getting the mail. Now I'm stuck outside on a windy October day or How to run into your crush looking you absolute worst.
Goodie Two-Shoes
Rating T, 3516 words
Something about Remus, the exchange student from Beauxbatons, sparks Sirius’ interest.
Mud equals Happiness
Rating T, 5630 words
The drizzle had died out, but the backyard of the rescue centre was muddy hell/paradise. Naturally, the dogs -and Harry, for that matter - had the times of their lives while it dawned on Remus that he had to wash all the dogs. Again.
Knitted Hideousness (Contains Wolfstar but is really Black-brother bonding)
Rating G, 682 words
Sirius is excited for his first Christmas with Remus' parents but Regulus' choice of clothing leaves him a little worried. At first.
Deamus
Breakfast in Company
Rating T, 1520 Words
It's a bright and sunny day mid-October when Dean meets the most peculiar person to ever enter his life.
Sweater weather spin-offs from @lumosinlove
The Spare (Regulus’ life)
Rating M, ca 60k words
Regulus quietly eased himself down on his bed, not making a noise and comprehending what he just overheard. His brother is clearly dating the person he called after dinner. But the voice on the phone was male, he called the person Remus. Sirius is dating a man. He is gay... playing in the NHL.
Holy shit.
‘Tis Me (Team and Regulus)
Rating M (for dudes being naked in the locker room), 528 words
When Regulus sees the tattoos Logan and Finn have gotten for Leo, they are in for a surprise.
Abort Mission (Coops and Team)
Rating G, 1637 words
Sirius and Remus are on their very first official date. Naturally, the team needs to stay close and protect them. Not snoop. Protect.
It said three people (O’Knutzy)
Rating E, 4400 words
Finn does not know what nature is, Logan has a map and Leo is cold.
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In the two and a half years since I first recorded Ship of Theseus, I have recorded dozens of podfics, and I feel like I have improved greatly since then. I recently listened to the old version of this pod, and I was not happy with how flat it sounded. So I recorded it again.
(old version in chapter 1, new version in chapter 2)
After James and Sirius replaced all of Lily's quills with self writing ones that only wrote love poems about James, Lily and Remus spent two weeks pretending they were dating. Holding hands in the common room. Sharing snacks. Sitting in each other’s laps. Sirius was losing his mind. James cried. Twice.
Raise your wands 🍆 for three Drarry fic recs containing delicious wandlore, plus one bonus non-Drarry ficlet!
🪄 1
Pathless Woods by @shealwaysreads /onereader (30k, Explicit)
Harry finds himself unexpectedly reacquainted with Draco Malfoy when his work as an apprentice wandmaker takes him to Wiltshire. Amongst the trees Harry finds magic, growth, and a man who might finally be proving he’s worthy of the wand that chose him.
A story of found family, trees with feelings, belief in the power of growth, wandlore, and gratuitous description of Handsome Estate Owner™ Draco Malfoy swanning around in white shirts and leather boots.
Wand nerd Harry! Tree nerd Draco! Amazing wand lore and 'forest lore', beautifully and lushly described by Bella, the queen of magical atmosphere. Bonus points for Mr Darcy-style Draco tromping around his estate.
Quote that made me snort: "Any promotion of your business will absolutely be based on how gorgeous your wood is.” Harry smiled reassuringly, then blanched at how ridiculous his wording sounded. “Er. I mean. The wood, not your wood. The wand wood, that’s yours.”
🪄 2
A Hag, A Hex, A Tale of Redemption by @aibidil (43k, Explicit)
A fuck-or-die fairytale in which Draco Malfoy lives a despicable and unapologetic life — that is, until he's cursed to die unless he can fall in love with and fuck Harry Potter.
Not only does this fic have fabulous wandlore (wands for non-wizards!), but it's a twenty-four carat fuck-or-die curse fic (in a CONSENT fest, so think about the implications there). It features a a deliciously unredeemed and furious Draco and, of course, is crammed full of Aib's impeccable humour and smarts. The deft use of a folklore-y fable adjacent narrative style rounds off what is simply an excellent fic.
🪄 3
Body Electric by @lastontheboat (8k, Mature)
“What could you possibly want?” Harry asks.
"Would you believe I’m here for assistance with my wand?” Malfoy replies, still refusing to meet his eyes, and Harry snorts.
“There are other wand makers,” he says tightly. “Unless you’ve slept with all of them as well.”
Packed with magical theory and both wandmaking craft AND Veela magic. The characterisations had me kicking my feet (these boys could bicker for England), and the insanely hot UST had my heart racing. Absolute banger.
🪄 Bonus rec
Ollivander & Thomas, Makers of Fine Wands by @rainstormradish (584 words, Gen)
“Spruce and unicorn hair, eleven inches.”
This was how Garrick Ollivander greeted Dean, voice faint and croaky, in the dungeons of Malfoy Manor. Dean nodded, before realising abruptly that the spruce wand was no longer his.
A glimpse at Dean’s life after the war, his relationship with magic and the wandmaking art he learned to master.
Utterly glorious and fascinating worldbuilding from Radish, featuring Dean Thomas as a wandmaker. This fic is the loveliest thing, chock full of feels, and you'll fall in love with the fabulous goblin girl! 500 words of sheer gorgeousness. Why, why *thumps fist on table* WHY do we not have more Dean fic?
I must must MUST know what Harry's favorite thing about Draco's is
His smile.
Most people never see it. Most people assume the harsh lines of his face combined with a biting attitude to match is all that is there.
Yes, Harry's favorite thing about Draco is his smile.
The way his lips twitch every morning when they are woken up by Penny—their deaf owl that doesn't realize the sheer volume she possesses with each hoot. The way a small smile curves his lips when he sees that tea has been made for him at breakfast despite the fact that Harry has been doing that for years. The way a shy smile comes out whenever Harry holds his hand, the gentle curve just begging to be kissed. The way he grins every time Harry leaves for work and forgets his broom. Every. Single. Day.
But his favorite smile, oh no, his favorite smile is the small gentle one pressed into Harry's neck at night when he is told how much he is loved, how much he is cared for and how Harry thanks every single day that Draco became his husband.
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like i'm sorry but we as a fandom have to stay firm on our anti-AI values. we cannot suddenly start giving AI a pass when it's something we "want to see" like destiel kisses. it's not suddenly fine. we're not going to start using AI to make fanfic scenes come to life or audio AI to make characters "say" stuff we want to hear. you have GOT to be firm on your anti-AI stance. if you start making exceptions then suddenly anything will fly. fandom is for real art and creations made by real people. no AI fanfics. no AI art. no AI rendered "bonus" scenes. no AI audio. none of it has a place here.
no Voldemort AU, Remus never went to Hogwarts, post-Hogwarts, omegaverse, omega Remus, omega James, alpha Sirius, Ravenclaw Sirius, Healer Sirius, chubby Sirius, slow burn, blood and injury, sex dreams, anal sex, vomiting, anxiety, nightmares, crushes, heat, rimming, dubious consent due to heat, communication issues, blowjobs, spitroasting, threesome, knotting, getting together, sex toys, happy ending
In a world where omegas must legally belong to an alpha—whether a partner, a friend, or a family member, it doesn’t matter—omega couple Remus and James have run away after James’s parents died and Remus’s dad wouldn’t legally claim James to keep him from being sent away. After a bad full moon, they run into an alpha called Sirius, who also happens to be a Healer. Is it safe for them to follow him home to get Remus’s arm fixed?
[ boys having tea & fixing broken house magic, etc. for the @drarrymicrofic march prompt: ubiquitous. ]
drarry | word count: ~880 | rating: g | warnings: n/a
_ _ _
The Floo line had been tetchy, dropping calls and, occasionally, sending visitors to the jeweler’s down the street. Harry’d let it be, unbothered, or not bothered enough, until Hermione was deposited into a neighbor’s spare bedroom— at which point, it was no longer really his choice.
She’d asked a colleague who’d asked a friend who’d asked a cousin who’d made the recommendation.
That was how Draco Malfoy came to be standing in Harry’s foyer.
“It’s nice,” he said, doing a cursory spin, glance skipping over Harry’s home, briefcase in hand, cloak still on.
“Can I take that?” Harry offered, gesturing to the coat rack, the thing moody from disuse.
“No need,” Draco answered. “The Floo?”
Harry showed him to the living room, the main fireplace.
“Do you know the year the house was built?”
“I— no. It’s 18th-century, but—”
Draco cut him off, a smile that betrayed an amused impatience curling small over his lips.
“Yes, I was rather hoping for specifics. I know it’s 18th-century, given the—” and he gestured then, vaguely, to the house, to nothing in particular, “but the Floo coding legislation underwent several revisions, new statutes and such, in the latter decades. Depending on the build date, it could help identify the particulars of the problem.”
“Ah,” Harry answered eloquently. “I could send a note to Ms. Aldrich? I’m a tenant, technically, so I’m not really up to date on the history, but I think she’d know. I think it was a family home for a good while, something like three generations, maybe. I mean, I don’t know that they owned it all the way back, but—”
Harry paused, feeling the babble spilling out of him. “Anyway, it— I could send an owl. If you like.”
Draco shook his head, deftly folding his cloak over the nearby sofa and placing his briefcase on the coffee table, unlatching it, rolling up his sleeves.
“Diagnostic spells and magitachometer will do us nearly as well. Just might require a bit more patience.” He withdrew the device, began adjusting a series of dials and switches along the side.
He glanced up. “You’re welcome to observe, of course, but it isn’t strictly necessary. If you have other things to do…”
He let the implication linger, and Harry could take a hint.
“Yeah, sure. Few letters to respond to, if you don’t mind.”
Draco hummed, and Harry departed for the stairs, ascending to his bedroom, his desk, the quiet awareness of Draco’s presence following and lingering like a fog.
_ _ _
“Tea?” Harry offered a bit past an hour later, cup already in hand.
Draco pushed his hair from his forehead, rose from his kneel in front of the hearth. “Alright,” he said, accepting the saucer, sitting on the chaise, summoning Harry’s sugar from the kitchen without waiting for invitation.
Harry, sat in his favorite chair, jacquard and overstuffed, nodded at the shaker. “How did you know I’d have sugar?”
“Because, in spite of your many faults, Potter, you’re not a monster.” He took a magnanimous sip, eyes alight.
Harry scoffed a sound like a laugh.
“And,” Draco offered eventually, “Weasley takes sugar in his tea, too. An ungodly amount, I might mention. So.”
“You notice things like that,” Harry said, eyes trailing from the shaker to Draco’s hands, fiddling with his teaspoon.
“A lot worth noticing,” Draco responded, deferring. “It’s served me well, anyway. Helps with the job, to be sure.”
“Yeah?” Harry answered, not reading too far in.
Draco placed his cup with a clink on the low oak table. “Here,” he said, a quick flourish and careful twist of his wand.
Suddenly threads of gold and green and blue shot across Harry’s living room, woven together, looping, delicately intertwined, then veering off along the walls into various corners and crannies.
Harry reached out for a string, and his fingers passed through it, thrumming, the feeling of it racing up his arm and pinging tenderly at the base of his skull, in his teeth.
“Oh,” he said, fingers drawing to the nape of his neck, chasing the odd sensation, but it was there and gone like that. “How did you do that?”
“Just an illumination charm,” Draco replied, a funny, fond look in his eyes.
“This is the web of house magic. Mostly. A bit of it’s yours. But you’ve got your wards, climate charms, Floo network, of course, some summoning enhancements, expansion work. Some personality, too,” he said, tracing a tangled line of gold.
Harry’s eyes followed it up, outwards, where it curled across the ceilings, reaching up into the second story. “And it’s just here?” he asked, quiet. “Always?”
Draco hummed, his own eyes falling on Harry’s face, following his gaze. “It’s sort of omnipresent like that.”
“Everywhere,” Harry said. Then, a bit breathless as he plucked at a braided strand: “Everything.”
Draco fell silent, a beat of it passing between them, before he shook his head, as if to clear it, and rose from the chaise. “Let me finish with your Floo, Potter. Shouldn’t be long now.”
“Would you show me?” Harry asked abruptly, not wanting to retreat again into his room. Not wanting to go.
Draco eyed him, his thumb tracing thoughtful, thoughtless circles over the hilt of his wand.
I don’t think it’s right for you to be asexual and married. It just doesn’t seem fair to your husband. He didn’t sign up to be in a sexless marriage? How do you make sure his needs are still met?
i trapped him in a jar like he’s a little bug and i throw some non-sexual intimacy in every once and a while so he has enrichment in his enclosure
actually you know what, i have more to say about this.
i’ve identified as bisexual for a really long time. like it was one of the first things i told jp (my husband) when we started dating long time. jp has never had a problem with my queerness. but when we started dating in january of 2018, i didn’t have all of the orientation pieces. so i had sex. and i had sex because i thought that’s what i was supposed to do. and i cannot stress enough how consensual all of the sex was. but it didn’t feel fantastic like i was told it would. i didn’t think about it as much as i was supposed to. there was no bliss. my toes didn’t curl and my eyes didn’t roll to the back of my head. i just didn’t enjoy it. and i thought not enjoying it meant there was something wrong with me. and since it was a me thing, and not anyone’s fault, i had sex. i just pretended that i liked it the way that society told me i should.
so me and my husband had sex because it was something he wanted and i didn’t mind doing.
but this past year i realized and came to terms with the fact my disinterest in sex wasn’t a nerve problem like my gynecologist said or trauma based like an old therapist said or any other explanation offered to me by anyone from friends to medical professionals. my disinterest in sex was because because i don’t experience that kind of attraction.
and when i finally figured it out i was kinda devastated. because i was faced with either a) continuing to pretend to enjoy it, or b) coming out to jp. i knew he wouldn’t take it badly because i love and trust him, but i can know something is true and still not believe it. so i was scared but decided to come out even though the thought literally made me sick. i cried and apologized and told him how horrible i felt that i “lied” to him for years and how terrified i was that he was going to think i wasn’t attracted to him anymore or that i wasn’t ever attracted to him in the first place. i had to tell a man that i’d been having sex with for years that i didn’t want to anymore. that i didn’t enjoy it. that i’d never enjoyed it. that i didn’t know if i’d ever want to have sex again.
and do you all want to know what his response was?
he asked if he’d ever hurt me. and then he asked what my boundaries are. and then he thanked me for telling him. and then he said he married me because he loved me, not because i’d fuck him.
so me and my husband used to have sex. and now we don’t because six years into our relationship i realized i was aspec. and we haven’t had sex since i came out to him. he hasn’t even tried, even though i told him that i didn’t mind having sex, just that he would have to be the one to bring it up because i don’t ever think about it. but he hasn’t brought it up. not once. because he knows it’s about like going to the pharmacy for me.
so my husband doesn’t have sex with me because he loves me. because he cares about me. because he wants me to be happy. because when he asked me to go on that very first date it was because he thought i was smart and enthusiastic and funny and “lovely.” because he knew he was in it for the long haul when he watched me shotgun a red bull in a harbor freight parking lot at 7:30 pm on a thursday.
that’s kind of what marriage is about. the whole loving and wanting to take care of and cherishing your significant other thing. sex has never been a big part of the equation.
jp stayed with me the first six months of my sobriety. he stayed even though one time i had three tequila shots too many and yarffed all over him. and then again in his floorboards. he stayed when my grief made me shut down and shut out and for over a year. he stayed with me when that grief made me so depressed i’d spend days at a time just staring at a wall. or hours and hours reading fanfic so the only thoughts i had in my head belonged to someone else. he stayed even though i don’t remember most of 2023. he’s stayed through every good thing and bad thing and in between thing and literally every single think for the past nearly seven years.
so i highly doubt not “putting out” is gonna be the thing that makes him leave.
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I read The Most Splendid Thing, by our beloved @lqtraintracks, and what a thoroughly wonderful use of my Sunday. Diverting, funny, intense, searingly hot (shocking no one), and at times, achingly and unexpectedly dear, it had my heart from the get-go.
As an Erised 2024 offering, it hasn't been on my marked for later as long as some, but it's a damn good thing that we don't go in chronological order in this house, because it was absolutely PERFECT for my weekend. Just what I needed--some honest, hard-working, classic, tropey, splendid drarry fanfiction.
Thanks so much for creating such a lovely story to share with all of us.
If, reader, for some strange reason you, like I had, haven't read this yet, hop to! Let's get this show on the road!
Hello, I have slept and have further thoughts about the Amnesia Chaos AU:
Back to where Remus hit his head.
At first, Sirius just wants to get him home and leave. He cannot take him to a hospital because there's too much chance he'd get caught (I have settled on the "broke from prison" agenda - or on parole but he kinda just murdered people so, he needs to be a lil careful you know 😊😇). But when he arrives at the house (checked Remus' pockets for the keys) he is absolutely horrified of the state of Remus place.
He barely has any furniture (Bedframe? Don't know her!), all his houseplants are dead and rotten, his fridge smells concerning and is basically empty, everything is kind of a huge mess. What is going on?
From observing Remus for the last weeks, Sirius knows that he does have some money - he's not rich by all means but he works as a teacher and should be able to live somewhat comfortably! So... why doesn't he??
Now, Sirius' interest is peaked and he decides to stay - once again - and just clean up a little while Remus comes to and then maybe ask him "What the hell is wrong with you, do you need any help?"
But when Remus comes to, he doesn't seem to remember anything. Not why his house looks like that, not why his head hurts so much - not even who Sirius is. But since Sirius is in his house, cleaning his kitchen and hands him a cup of tea as he carefully sits up on the sofa, Remus just assumes Sirius might be... a friend??
Remus doesn't remember if he has any friends. He can't even remember his own name. But Sirius remembers his name. Sirius remembers a lot about him and he is in his house taking care of him. So maybe Sirius is more than just a friend?
When Remus asks him so, Sirius has to make a quick decision. He can tell the stranger the truth and then probably get the police called on him or... or he can just smile and comb his fingers through that confused guy's wispy hair and wipe his thumb over his cheek as the stranger gives him a shy smile - and aww he has dimples! Sirius has a soft spot for dimples 😊
So he stays. Once more. Only this time he gets to see more of Remus' face. And of the rest of his body, as the days pass.
Sirius makes up some very elaborate lies about him being away for work for a while and Remus must have been robbed (hence the headwound and the state of the house) and that he already talked to the police so there is nothing to worry about! He makes Remus call in sick for work for a bit so he can recover (and to keep him from telling anyone about Sirius) and this all goes well until there's a knock on the door...
I'M LIVING THE BEST LIFE GETTING INCREDIBLE FICS DELIVERED TO MY INBOX THANK U FOR THIS TREAT SLOTHY BUT ALSO WTF WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME ON THAT CLIFFHANGER WHO IS AT THE DOOR??????
I can hardly type the entire thing into your ask box at once, what would that look like? Like I'm some sort of mad mole!
So who is at the door?😊
It's Peter! Remus' toxic ex boyfriend who is, as it transpires also the reason why Remus' place looks the way it does!
Peter left while Remus was at work, taking all of "his" stuff with him and only leaving Remus a note (Sirius has found that note crumpled between some pizza boxes while cleaning up, so he knows exactly who is standing in front of him when the guy at the door holding a flower boquet that looks like it came from a gas station introduces himself and asks for Remus - and also who is Sirius??)
Turns out, Peter would actually like to have Remus back since the new guy he dumped him for (some fucker named Gilderoy) turned out to be a useless prat and not at all as rich and successful as Peter thought. He seems genuinely surprised that Remus already has someone new and then someone looking like this?
Sirius manages to send him away easily before Remus can even catch a glimpse and thinks "Phew, crisis averted" BUT ALAS!
In Peter's mind the wheels have started turning, the hamsters are running, he is making connections like that guy in the "It's always sunny" meme, because that doesn't make sense. Remus doesn't go and meet new people and even if he does he isn't that quick to let them move in. Also, that guy is way too fucking hot for him and also Peter feels like he recognizes him from somewhere...
Peter keeps sneaking around the house, trying to find the proof he needs to rat Sirius out [haha] to the police, because he is so sure that's that guy on the wanted posters he has seen at work. He does some more research and realises that Sirius was convicted for robbing a bank and that the money was never found.
Now, that causes Peter to make a critical mistake. He gets greedy. So instead of taking all the candid shots he took of Sirius taking out the trash and planting new flowers in the front yard, to the police, he approaches him. Tells him what he knows. But that he'd gladly keep his mouth shut, as long as Sirius will cooperate 😊😇 and give him some of the money. He'll even help him retrieve it, no problem!
Oh, what a nice offer!
I don't think I have to explain in detail how they take a trip to "fetch the money" that Peter never returns from.
One more problem sorted! Great. Amazing! Sirius returns home to the fake boyfriend that he has really grown to care about and maybe even has developed some pesky feelings that he usually likes to avoid - only to find himself faced with a new and unexpected obstacle.
Remus does indeed have friends. And they have come to visit. A lovely couple with their baby son. They are sitting at the very clean kitchen table with Remus and have never heard a word of Sirius in their life. They are also very concerned that Remus seems a little confused (he doesn't remember them at all but still let them in, worried he could be impolite - something that in turn causes Sirius to be very concerned) and would really like to know what is going on and who is Sirius please?
The baby is babbling in its carrier. Oh, how is he going to solve that one?!
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vampires and werewolves AU, modern AU, vampire Remus, werewolf Sirius, enemies to lovers, angst, blood drinking, first meeting, suicidal thoughts, soulmates, kissing, anal sex, childe/sire bond, kidnapping, implied past self-harm, referenced noncon, minor character death, guns, gunshot wounds, illness
Remus’s life changes completely when he gets attacked by a vampire. As he tries to stay away from the hunters, he keeps running into a werewolf named Sirius against his will.
I'm very thrilled to do a creator rec list of some of my fave works by @sweatersinthesummer, who is not just a wonderful podficcer but a kind, hilarious person as well! If you haven't come across her works, check out some of these!
[Podfic] Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia
Gallaplacidia's fics are so good, so Pajammy's recordings of them are treasures. Ship of Theseus is one of my personal faves!!
[Podfic] The Last Coffee by kbrick
Sad but hopeful AKA CHEF'S KISS (plus Pajammy's voice 🥹)
[Podfic] Hoppípolla by Moonflower_Rose
I love this title so much, listen to it
[Podfic] Move, move by MaesterChill
I like fics about dancing........... SUE ME
[Podfic] Happy Returns by toomuchplor
"I swear to Merlin, if you don't ask him out soon, I'm going to murder you both," says Neville.
Need I say more??
Anyway, thanks for lending us your voice, Pajammy! Everyone, go listen to these podfics!!
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