Putting Zhuge Liang in Situations

-_-

汉字: Chinese writing, (lit: script of the Han)

汉语: chinese language, (lit: language of the Han)

汉服: traditional clothes, (lit: Han costume)

汉: Han ethnic group, which makes up 99% of china's population

好汉: hero/brave person, (lit: a good Han)

A fun story about a small jail official named He Zhi lol 😆

时诸葛亮用法峻密，阴闻祗游戏放纵，不勤所职，尝奄往录狱。众人咸为祗惧。祗密闻之，夜张灯火见囚，读诸解状。诸葛晨往，祗悉已闇诵，答对解释，无所凝滞，亮甚异之

"At that time, Zhuge Liang was strict in enforcing the law. He secretly heard that Zhi was indulging in play and neglecting his duties, so he once secretly went to inspect the prisons. Everyone was terrified for Zhi. Zhi secretly overheard this, and at night, he lit lamps and met with the prisoners, reading their accusations. Zhuge went the next morning, and Zhi had already recited everything from memory, answering and explaining without hesitation. Liang was greatly surprised."

出补成都令，时郫县令缺，以祗兼二县。二县户口猥多，切近都治，饶诸奸秽，每比人，常眠睡，值其觉寤，辄得奸诈，众咸畏祗之发摘，或以为有术，无敢欺者。使人投算，祗听其读而心计之，不差升合，其精如此。

"Zhi was later appointed magistrate of Chengdu. At that time, the magistrate of Pi County was vacant, so Zhi was appointed to govern both counties. These two counties had a large population and were close to the capital, rife with corruption. He often fell asleep when interrogate people, but when he woke up, their deceit would be discovered. Everyone feared Zhi's ability to expose them, and some even thought he had a special skill, so no one dared to cheat. When someone was given a calculation, Zhi would listen to it read and calculate it in his mind, never making a mistake. Such was his precision."

我都不知道怎麼解釋這玩意是我期末作業。。

Just found another nice story about how Zhuge Liang recruit and persuade people to work for him.

杜微字國輔... 及先主定蜀，微常稱聾，閉門不出。

建興二年，丞相亮領益州牧。選迎皆妙簡舊德，以秦宓為別駕，五梁為功曹，微為主簿。微固辭，舉而致之。既致，亮引見微，微自陳謝。亮以微不聞人語，於坐上與書曰：

服聞德行，飢渴歷時，清濁異流，無緣諮覯。王元泰、李伯仁、王文儀、楊季休、丁君乾、李永南兄弟、文仲寶等，每歎高志，未見如舊。猥以空虛，統領貴州，德薄任重，慘慘憂慮、朝廷主公今年始十八，天姿仁敏，愛德下士。天下之人思慕漢室，欲與君因天順民，輔此明主，以隆季興之功，著勳於竹帛也。以謂賢愚下相為謀，故自割絕，守勞而已，不圖自屈也。

微自乞老病求歸，亮又與書答曰：

曹丕篡弒，自立為帝，是猶土龍芻狗之有名也。欲與羣賢因其邪偽，以正道滅之。怪君未有相誨，便欲求還於山野。丕又大興勞役，以向吳、楚。今因丕多務，且以閉境勤農，育養民物，並治甲兵，以待其挫，然後伐之，可使兵不戰民不勞而天下定也。君但當以德輔時耳，不責君軍事，何為汲汲欲求去乎！

Summary: About Du Wei, a secluded deaf (maybe?) scholar. When Zhuge Liang select officials (based on their past virtues and merits), he offered him a position, but Wei refused many times because of old age. Liang welcomed and introduced him to the court, and knowing Wei couldn't hear, Liang wrote and handed him two letters to persuade him to work.

(not serious at all) translation of what he wrote:

"Many people praised you, I feel as if you were an old friend. My ability and virtue is not that great but the responsibility is heavy, and I am filled with deep anxiety. Liu Adou is a good emperor though. People still yearn for the Han, so please assist me on this 🥺"

"That Cao Pi guy is treacherous, it is strange that you already desire to return to the mountains and fields. Now he is busy with affairs, please help me with domestic affairs before launching a final attack. You won't have to do military stuff, why are you so eager to leave?"

liu bei: okay then

that height difference… that size difference…. that exact trope of ‘depending on each other’ like xuanliang… i cannot pretend i don’t ship top zhu yuanzhang (?!) with bottom liu bowen anymore

the size difference is too great. is too great. height difference. size difference. i cannot pretend anymore that almost every military man has their scholar male wife. a whole head taller

good news for jiajing fans (me obviously)

good news for longqing fans too (if there is one, i guess i can be that too). will make a seperate it’s so good it deserves its own post

PAY RESPECT TO HIS MAJESTY, JIAJING HUANGDI. BIXIA!!

remember his crash out like an abused child in a violence household. i remember my mother’s yelling and hurling very well, mama. mother,, don’t be mad…