I See You — N. Sully
Neteyam x Snow Na’vi! Reader
Author Note: To celebrate 100 followers!! Here is what you guys voted for! Remember when I’d say ‘shes long’ for my other fics… yeah shes the longest BY FAR (I think? Don’t quote me.) I’m lwk proud of this one…
Summary: It is your duty to lead spirits who have strayed from Eywa. Now you have to lead the spirit of a boy, Neteyam, back to your spirit tree, back to Eywa. (Taking inspo from Nunavut, Canada for this fic!)
Warnings: Neteyam would ask so many questions now that he’s ’free’ (you can’t tell me otherwise) Neteyam’s a ghost/spirit…, happy ending..?
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Song: The Moon Will Sing — The Crane Wives
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Backstory — Not mandatory to read:
(But does help understand story!)
Your tribe lived out in the mountains, knowing for being able to survive temperatures far below zero. Your tribe had come up with a take of how your people came to be, passed down generations, your people actually used to be forest Na’vi.
Until one decided he’d had enough of the forest life and ran away with his mate.
At the time they weren’t created to survive harsh weathers. The male Na’vi died from a snow storm, and his mate wept and wept for him. Eywa saw her crying for her mate and brought him back to life. Only she changed them, enabling them lighter skin to blend into the frozen trees, their blood and skin warmer than any other Na’vi to battle the cold, darker eyes against the brightness of the sun, thicker tails to swim under the ice. The only thing Eywa asked of them in return was to look after the spirits who grew conscious of their death, and drifted away from her, where their souls would be trapped within the snowy range, unable to leave the limit where snow meets grass until your people were able to guide them home.
Eywa helped them settle in the mountains, where the trees were frozen over, setting up their own huts. But soon enough they had children, and their children had children, and so on.
Wouldn’t that mean you were all related? According to the story there’s a sliver of a chance.
That is if they were still alive.
The winter mating season, when the hunters came back with their catches. The season you, and so many others, were born. You were born, or as they said “cursed”, with pale skin, almost as light as snow.
That winter solecist was the largest snow storm your tribe had seen in centuries.
You were the sole baby to survive.
The tribe elders banished you in fear of another storm arriving. Your mother didn’t dare leave you, so you were banished together. You two then lived where the snow meets the forest, she taught you everything you needed to know, to hunt and fish, to weave and make song chords, how to camouflage using your pale skin. She made sure to let you know that your skin was beautiful, that it wasnt your fault that you were banished.
The winter season of your tenth birthday another winter storm hit, this one was just as big, if not more, then the season you were born. Your mother died just before the season started, an unknown illness that she’d been hiding from you.
You were alone. Cold. Afraid.
You wanted to be accepted into your clan. To be apart of your family once more. You walked the path to the village, the village you could only watch from afar as they had ceremonies, celebrated, mourned.
You were close to the village, you knew you were becuase you recognized the frozen trees you’d hide in to watch festivities. There was still heavy snow fall from the winter season, and presumably the snow storm. You heard faint muffled whimpering, not too far away. You began to shift around, digging at the snow, until you found a hand, attached to an arm, attached to a body, the body of the Olo'eyktan.
You shrieked, jumping back. The whimpering you had heard had ceased, but you realized that the storm hadn’t only taken your mother, but your entire clan.
You were alone.
The last of your clan.
Over the next five years spirits of your tribe have visited, disconnected from their home with Eywa, but you’d guide them back each time. Hoping that, soon, your mother would come. But she never did.
——
You saw the smoke rising from the reef clans territories, the screams of their people and warriors, and the clashes of metals. It was everyday that you’d get spirits, refusing their death, telling you of the war, reminiscing about their families and how they died. But no matter who it was, you reconnected them with Eywa.
It wasn’t until after the war had ended that you got a new spirit, but he didn’t seem like the other warriors you’d seen. He was young, your age maybe, his darker blue skin contrasting your pale blue, he was wearing warrior gear, leather arm bands and collar along with goggles for flying ikran’s. He was obviously a warrior, but why was he so young?
You were in a tree, your bow and arrow in hand as you were ready to hunt before the boy arrived, “Where am I?” He spotted you behind all the pine needles and twigs, snow fell as you jumped from branch to branch, the boys head was following your every movement in the trees. “You are in the mountains,” you finally spoke up, “where spirits roam until reconnected with Eywa.”
You had a clear view of the boy, you could see his golden eyes squint to see you in the clusters of pine. “My name is Neteyam, son of Toruk Makto—” “That name has no status here.” You interrupted him, you had heard whispers of the great Toruk Makto, an Avatar that had earned the respect of the forest people and united clans, but no one dared to enter the snow lands, Toruk Makto meant nothing.
You continue to evaluate the boy, “Am I alive?” He asked. You finally emerged from the trees, landing silently on the snow in front of him, and you instantly feel his eyes roaming you. “Can you feel the snow under your feet? The cold nipping at your skin?” You poked his chest. Neteyam wiggled his toes, digging them into the snow. He couldn’t feel anything, because he was dead. While he could touch things, he can never feel.
“I can’t…” his head was down, looking at our feet, “How did I… die?” Neteyam looked up at you, his eyes teary, you shook your head, “Unfortunately I don’t hold those answers,” you patted his shoulder, an endearing gesture probably made awkward from years of isolation, “but I am supposed to lead you back to Eywa.” You step back, finally taking in all his features, he was pretty for a boy, presumably from the Omaticaya clan.
If his father was Toruk Makto then that means he has demon blood within him. You suddenly jump back as if he burned you, which wasn’t physically possible. Neteyam’s eyes widened, “What’s wrong?” He asked, “You carry demon blood.” His body stiffened, “Does that make reconnecting me with Eywa any different?” You hesitated for a moment “No,” You circle around him, examining his build, you twirled his tail around your finger, he must’ve gotten most of his features from his mother because the demon genes didn’t shine through.
“It will take a while, but your… design… is not meant to travers in the mountains.” You stopped in front of him once more, “Then I will learn, I adapted to the ways of the Metkayina. I will learn the ways of…?” You gripped your bow tight, “Tsahìk Tì’eyng (Made up! ‘Means’: Clan of the Frozen Spirit).” You answered, “I’ve never heard of that clan.” Neteyam sounded genuine, his head tilted. “Because I’m the only one left.” If you gripped any tighter then your bow would snap. Neteyam’s ears lowered, pity and sympathy written on his face, “I’m sorry…” “You weren’t the one who caused it.”
Or maybe he was. Well not him. But his kind. The sky people, the reason for the demon blood coursing through his veins. You quickly shook the thought from your head, it wasn’t his fault for his parents, nor was it the sky people that wiped out your clan.
You turned away, scanning the forest for anything that you could still hunt. Neteyam stumbled to your side, a patch of ice under the snow catching him off guard as he slipped and fell onto his back, “Ouch,” he groaned, “wait, that didn’t hurt?” “You can’t feel anything, remember?” You held his forearms helping him sit up. “First lesson; watch out for ice.” You slid him away from the ice and slowly pulled him to his feet, “Thanks, oh wise one.”
“I see you.” You made the hand motions, speaking in a mocking tone, “I see you.” Neteyam replied, mimicking your voice. After all the noise that was made surely there was nothing else to be hunted, so you made your way back to your hut, Neteyam on your tail, his eyes never leaving the ground. “If you don’t look up then you’ll fall.” You stated, a smirk growing on your face. “Then what do you suggest I do?” His voice laced with panic as his arms were spread out like an ikran ready to take flight, “Don’t fall.” You laugh at what you said, Neteyam rolled his eyes but couldn’t stop the smile growing on his face.
You reached your hut. You had set it up not far from where the village once was, still buried under snow. “Luckily, you don’t need food to function.” You already had a futon made, you always had one ready, not knowing when a new spirit would appear. “So how do I get back to Eywa?” Neteyam asked, you sighed and paused making your dinner. You led him back outside, where there was a clear view of your spirit tree. You pointed, Neteyam’s eyes following the direction.
The tree was white, covered with snow, from within the tree was emitting a blue light. It was a top a mountain, with others around it, and frozen lakes hosting other snow clans near them.
(Not my photo!)
“That is our great tree, you will have to connect with Eywa that way.” You drew Neteyam’s attention back to you, he was close, too close. “When do we leave?” He asked, his eyes flickering back to the spirit tree, “In the morning.” You state, taking a step back from him and back into your hut.
Nightfall was all day thanks to the winter season. In contrast to the summer season, where there is still snow, the sun is always shining. You finished eating, Neteyam was sitting outside, admiring the night sky without a care in the world.
The ground began to tremor as something large began to approach. You stepped out, just behind Neteyam who was now on his feet. A white creature was rapidly approaching, it’s fur thick and long, two long tusks hung from its mouth, as two pairs of horns were emerged from its head, its tail wide and thick like yours, and four big clawed paws scraped at the ice and snow below it as it barrelled your way.
(Not my photo!)
Neteyam drew out his knife, “No!” You demanded, stepping beside him and forcefully lowering his arm. The creature, a tundradon, your soul brother, skidded to a stop just in front of you two. You stuck your hand out petting his furry forehead, the tundradon let out a satisfied purr. You took Neteyam’s hand, the one not holding the knife, guiding it to where yours is positioned, “He doesn’t bite, unless you give him reason too.” You stated, “What is he?” Neteyam asked, he looked at your brother in awe, “A tundradon, his name is Tìfrrpay. They are like your ikran, but don’t fly.”
You went inside to grab a large fish to feed your brother, “He will be the one that takes us to the spirit tree.” “How long will it take to get there?” You think for a moment, “A week, if there are no snow storms.” You could see Neteyam thinking, but decided not to push.
——
The night finally settled, you and Neteyam in your respected futons, and your tundradon brother sleep-guarding outside. “Can I see my family?” Neteyam broke the silence, it was a question that was waiting to be asked, all spirits ask if they can see their families, “You can’t leave this territory.” It was better to tell the truth flat out rather than ‘sugar coat’ it. Silence filled the hut once more, but you could hear Neteyam shift in his futon, you turned your head to find him facing you, “Why?” You turn your head once more to face the ceiling, “Why do you ask so many questions?”
Silence settled once more, “You didn’t answer my question.” Neteyam shifted again, “Neither did you.” You replied coldly. You could feel his eyes burning into you, it was your turn to shift, rolling onto your side, your back now facing Neteyam. To be honest you didn’t know why he truly couldn’t leave, he was bound to you, which now meant that you couldn’t leave the snowy territory either.
Finally there was silence. Only the echos of the wind hitting your hut, and the dying crackles of the fire putting you to sleep.
— Day 1 —
In theory it was ‘morning’, but the endless winter eclipse said other wise. You silently moved from your futon, packing satchels and grabbing Tìfrrpay’s saddle. You get dressed, sliding your qulittaq (type of parka) over your head, slipping on your kamiks (type of boot), and holding your pualuuk (mittens) in your hands as you step out to prepare Tìfrrpay for the journey.
You first strap on the saddle, then tie the satchels to the saddle. You talked to Tìfrrpay as you worked, being alone for so long he was the only person, or tundradon, you’ve ever had, he’s the only family you’ve had for coming on six years.
You heard light, cautious, footsteps from behind you. You turned your head to find Neteyam slowly making his way over, “So, we’re leaving now?” He questioned, arms rotating in circles to keep him balanced, “Yes,” you turned your attention back to securing the satchels to the saddle, “but we will need to take brakes to rest.” You double check the bags, making sure you have everything.
After a moment of silence Neteyam speaks up, “And you’re sure I’ll be reconnected with Eywa in the end?” “They all are.” You reply bluntly, he just nods. Finally you mount Tìfrrpay, pulling Neteyam up and behind you. He holds your waist tightly as you give your calling command to move.
Hours past, you’ve finally fallen into a rhythm with Neteyam, he’d periodically ask questions, you’d sing hymns of travel and protection, with breaks of silence in between. But Neteyam had been quiet longer than usual, “What is on your mind?” You ask, not looking back at him, “The sky,” he paused for a moment, thinking of his question, “is it always night here?” You look up as well, spotting the constellations your mother taught you when you were still little, “No, during the spring and summer seasons there is eternal sun.” Which was true. “Must be hard to sleep.” Neteyam tried to joke, but you could tell he was not one with humour, nonetheless you played along, “I suppose, but it does not get any warmer during those nights.”
——
Nightlife sprung as you neared a village, you were acquainted with their Olo'eyktan and Olo'eykte, “Welcome, Tsahik.” They considered you to be a Tsahik, despite no longer having a clan, you were your own clan. “I see you.” You greeted the leaders, they replied with kindness and open arms as always. “Guiding another lost one?” Their clans Tsahik, the Olo'eykte’s mother, asked. ‘Lost One’s were what the spirits were called amongst Tsahik’s. You nodded, “His name is Neteyam. He doesn’t know how he passed, but I’m sure it was the cause of the sky people and their war,” you took in a long breath, finally getting a chance to speak your mind, “what if the sky people come here? Destroy our tribes? Or worse. What if that ‘Toruk Makto’ asks us to fight, and brings his war to us?”
The Tsahik nodded, acknowledging your concerns, “Then we fight.” She finally speaks up, “But Tsahik—” she cuts you off before you can argue, “Sit child.” You do as you’re told, sitting across from the Tsahik. She begins to quietly chant a hymn to herself, probably asking Eywa to give her strength.
“All Na’vi are connected, we are all one. Snow represents the death and rebirth of, not only the seasons, but people and nations. So if it means protecting our tribes, our home, others homes, our planet, the we fight.”
She might be the villages crazy lady, but there was a reason she was the Tsahik. You bow slightly in apology, she raises your chin, “You bare to much on yourself, child. You’ve lived on your own for so long,” she extends her arm, motioning to the rest of her clan, “stay with us,” there were adults, mates and families, eating, some were dancing around the fire, recounting stories of great hunts from the winter season so far, while the little ones were playing with Neteyam, a game of tag presumably, but you could feel your chest swell, and it felt like a weight being lifted off your shoulders as you watched him running, smiling and laughing with the children, “where you can have a family.” The Tsahik finished speaking, snapping you out of your thoughts.
You’d love to have a family again, your mother would want you to have another family, a place where you belong. But you spared another glance at Neteyam, care free Neteyam, you wondered what he was like before he passed, and you wondered what it would be like if you’d become a spirit. Though it wasn’t your first time thinking such a thought. You opened your mouth to speak, not sure of what you’d say, but the Tsahik cut you off, “No need to decide now, just make sure you rest,” she gives you a side smile, catching you glancing at Neteyam, “and don’t get too attached.”
You were caught off guard, you could never grow attached to a spirit, you’ve never gotten attached to a spirit. The only spirit you wanted to see was your mother, and she never came. But this boy, Neteyam, born from a sky person, demon blood coursing— that once coursed through his veins, but now that he is a spirit, he no longer tied to that.
“I know to not get attached.” You state, still observing Neteyam from afar. But in the fire light, you noticed little things, his eyes held bits of green hues, the way his bioluminescent dots made up constellations on his skin; as if Eywa herself had kissed him, how the stripes on his face were a lighter shade of dark blue compared to the darker shade of blue stripes that covered his body. You also noticed the scar on his chest, in contrast to the rest of his body, which had clear blue skin, that scar was the only blemish he had. Was that how he died?
——
It was time for the village to settle in their huts, and you and Neteyam were placed into a spare hut. You scoped it out. Making the futons and placing your qulittaq beside your bed, with your kamiks and pualuuk neatly on top of the parka. You stepped out, calling Neteyam to come inside to rest. He didn’t argue, saying farewell to the children and headed your way.
You both fell asleep rather quickly. You stayed up later than Neteyam, whisper-singing a protection hymn for yourself, the village and Neteyam. After you sang the last lyric your eyes grew heavy, and the world faded to black as you fell asleep.
— Day 2 —
You woke to the sounds of the bustling tribe, hunters readying to chase, mothers and daughters sewing and crafting intricate details on their kamiks and pualuuk, and children creating snow men and making at mess of each other.
You sat up, gathering your qulittaq, you slipped on your kamiks to walk outside. You noticed Neteyam was still asleep and didn’t bother to wake him, even spirits need to rest. You were greeted by the Tsahik, “You are leaving?” You nodded, “I still must bring him to the spirit tree, unite him with Eywa once more.” The Tsahik lowered her head in thought for a moment, then nodded, “Very well then. At least come and eat.”
You joined the tribe for one last meal. When you finished you stood and thanked everyone as you’ve done many other times. You walked back to your provided hut. You lifted the opening, revealing a finally awake Neteyam, arms stretched over his head, “Sleep well?” You spoke up, starting him.
Neteyam whipped around to face you, his tail flicking, arms now by his side and eyes wide, “Good morning?” You speak again, he nodded, replying quietly “Morning.” You gathered everything once more, stepping out with Neteyam trailing behind you. “We are leaving so soon?” You turned to face the boy, a quizzical look on your face, was this the same boy that asked a dozen times that this travel guaranteed him a way back to Eywa? “You wish to stay longer?” You tilted your head, stepping closer to him, Neteyam backed slowly as you approached him.
“No.” Neteyam blurted out, you stopped walking, narrowing your eyes. He shook his head, stammering for words, “No, I didn’t mean no. I mean I would love to stay, but— I have somewhere else I need— not need, but not want either? It’s—” his breaths quickened, you placed your palm on his chest, “Breathe. Slowly,” you guided his hand to the skin over your diaphragm, taking deep breaths. Calming Neteyam, “We are in no rush to get to the spirit tree.” You spoke softly, he only nodded, trying to copy your breathing.
After Neteyam had calmed you finished packing, feeding Tìfrrpay his breakfast so he’ll have the energy to travel today, and loading any extra food the Tsahik had forcefully given you, and you and Neteyam gave your final thanks to the Olo'eyktan and Olo'eykte for their hospitality.
Finally you hoped onto Tìfrrpay, pulling Neteyam up with you, and you left the village.
The day went by slowly, as it always does. But Neteyam was quiet, he’d been quiet on this trip so far, Was he asleep? You turned your head, only to find Neteyam looking at you. He quickly averted his eyes, turning to look at the passing snowy hills. You raised an eyebrow (they have eyebrow… bones…? Idk.) “What?” “What?” He repeated, “You were staring.” You called him out.
Neteyam went quiet again, and you let him be, until he spike up again, “The Olo'eyktan and Olo'eykte from the last village called you a Tsahik, but you’re the only one left of your clan.” “Exactly, I am the Tsahik of myself.” You faced forward once more, “Must be easy then?” He questioned, “In a way yes, I only need to feed myself, and my brother,” you pause before speaking again, “though it does get lonely. When the spirits aren’t haunting me that is.” You cracked a smile, glancing over your shoulder to catch Neteyam holding his own grin.
You only stopped mid-day to give Tìfrrpay a break from walking, and then you were back to travelling. Not giving anything, or anyone, a chance to track and hunt you. You began to sign hymns once more, you could hear the predators and see silhouettes through the snow fall, “You keep singing,” you quieted, now humming, “what does it mean?”
You thought for a moment, how do you explain this in a way he could understand, “Song chords. Your people have them, yes?” “Yes,” He whispered, “you don’t?” Glanced at Neteyam once more, “Yes,” you repeated, you removed your song chord from your loin cloth that was covered by your qulittaq, handing it to him. “Though the hymns I sing are for traveling, asking Eywa for protection, to guide us on our way.” You finished explaining.
Neteyam was examining your song chord. In contrast to his own, yours was mainly made up of stone, shells and bones instead of intricate beads. “What does your song chord sound like?” He found his voice, “What does yours sound like?” You fired back, “I’m a warrior, not a singer.” He brushed a thumb over the bone of your first hunt, “And you are now a spirit. I don’t see what is stopping you.”
Neteyam looked to the sky again, and before he could ask you to point out constellations you began singing. Your mother’s voice rang through your head as you sang, the snow storm when you were born, first bonding with the spirit tree, your first steps, first winter season, bonding with Tìfrrpay, your first hunt. Your voice lowered, your mothers now gone from your mind. You sang of your mother’s passing, building your new home, your becoming of Tsahik. You finished the song, reaching the end of the chord, you hadn’t added anything, not having anything to add to it. Neteyam held out your song chord, “Hold on to it for now, I’ll take it when we stop next.” Which wasn’t very long, as you crossed the lake several smaller villages emerged.
You stopped by one of the villages, you weren’t as close to this one though. They believed the reason you were banished, and believed you were the cause of your clans demise. But you were there as Tsahik, so they allowed you to stay for the night.
This clan was close to the lake, so you decided was a good time to go water hunting. You unlatched your spear. Tìfrrpay let out a happy cry, knowing you will get him fresh food, “Where are you going?” Neteyam stood, stepping out beside you, “Hunting,” you took another step before stopping once more, “you were taught how to swim?” He was with the Metkayina for so long, the least they could do is teach him to swim. Neteyam nodded, his golden eyes looking into your darker ones, “Come on then.” You nodded your head toward the lake.
You shedded your qulittaq, dropping the extra layer on the ice as you began to make a hole in the ice to dive in. “Won’t it be cold?” Concern filled Neteyam’s face as he tugged your arm, pulling you back. His grip was firm, like he was trying to feel you even though it was impossible, “I was created for these tasks. And you? You can’t feel a thing.” You poked his chest like you had when you two first met.
With that you slid feet first into the water, spear by your side. You began to swim around, your thick tail, which rivaled the tail of a Metkayina. You swam gracefully, spear cutting through the water and directly through assortments of fish, Neteyam could only stare as you worked.
You finally looked over to him, and realized he was ‘holding his breath’. You let out a laugh, the bubbles floating to the surface, you signed “You can breathe down here, skxawng.” His eyes went wide, was it really that easy to forget you’re dead? Didn’t matter, he’d still live even if he’s ‘holding his breath’. You surfaced from the hole you made, tossing the spear full of fish on the ice. Neteyam surfaced across from you, not leaving much room as you two were chest to chest, and it didn’t help that you were breathing deeply, trying to catch your breath.
Finally you pushed up and out of the hole, Neteyam following, still across from you, your knees now brushing. Moments of silence passed over, you took in the cool air, legs dangling in the even colder water. “What’s it like? To be a spirit I mean.” It was you who was now asking the questions, “It feels… light. But also like I’m missing something, or someone.” You tilted your head as you listened to his explanation, he sighed, the cloud of breath flying up. You hummed in response.
In the distance the village was putting out their lights. You start to move, “It’s time to rest.” You reached your hand out to Neteyam, he took it and you pulled him onto the ice. Neteyam’s wet feet hit the ice, causing him to slide around, still gripping your hand tightly. His legs fled from under him, dragging you down with him. Neteyam crashed on his back, you landing on top of him with a grunt, “Sorry…” he mumbled. You lifted your head, faces inches apart, “I told you not to slip on the ice.” You stated, “Yeah.” Neteyam let his head fall back onto the ice as you stood up.
You walked back to your provided hut side by side, an awkward silence washed over as you avoided eye contact. You went on getting ready for bed in silence, you finally sat on the bed, back straight. You began to sing quietly, your back facing Neteyam, but you could feel his eyes boring into you as he laid on his own futon. What was going through his mind?
She’s so beautiful.
How can she have her back to me and still be so beautiful?
How can I not feel anything but still manage to feel things for her?
Neteyam’s thoughts were like ikran’s flying through his head. He’d only been getting used to living with the Metkayina, and he hardly knew any of the other clans that habited Pandora. And now there’s you and you’re showing him your world, only for him to leave it in mere days?
All he could do was lay there in the bed and stare at you like a child, hoping for the chance that you’ll even spare a glance his way.
Neteyam closed his eyes, slowly falling asleep listening to your soothing voice.
— Day 3 & 4 —
Day three passed in a blur, quite literally. A storm picked up as you crossed the frozen lake, there were no villages that dared to open up to you. You were lucky the lake didn’t open up and swallow you whole!
When it came time to rest you had to find an unoccupied cave, Tìfrrpay wrapped protectively around both you and Neteyam, squeezing you two together, Tìfrrpay’s thick skin and dense fluffy fur heated you throughout the night.
When you woke you found yourself in a different position from when you fell asleep. You were still I right, leaning against Tìfrrpay, but your head was resting against Neteyam’s shoulder, your bodies so close it was looking as if they were trying to fuse, his arm was wrapped tightly around you, not that you could feel any heat coming from him, but the sense of protection if anything were to attack.
You felt your cheeks heat up as Neteyam stirred awake, and you were grateful for the forever moon hiding your flushed face. After he was fully conscious you both stammered apologizes and shuffled away from each other.
You tossed a Tìfrrpay a fish from when you went water hunting, he happily ate, blissfully unaware with the tension that has been building up between you and Neteyam.
You tried to busy yourself, checking a map, counting your knives, sharpening your spear. While all of this was happening, Neteyam was still in the cave, silently watching you once more. After stalling long enough for Tìfrrpay to finish eating, you called out to Neteyam, “You ready to go?” The shuffling of movement gave you an answer, but his shoulder grazing your upper back left you with more questions.
Neteyam pulled himself up, the first time he’s done that. “We’ll find a village to rest soon,” you climbed up, sitting in front of Neteyam as you’ve done this whole journey, “it’s best if we can get the most rest tonight to travel the most tomorrow.” You didn’t want if to sound like you wanted him to leave, becuase you didn’t, but you could feel that’s how he heard it.
After minutes of Neteyam’s silent gloom, you had enough, “Would you like to try?” You motioned to the reins in your hands, Neteyam’s ears perked up in curiosity and he nodded eagerly. Slowly you stood, trying to keep balance as Tìfrrpay continued moving. Neteyam’s hand shot up to your thigh, first hovering over it, then once you began to move he gripped it. It was tight, once again, like he was trying to do the impossible and feel you.
Neteyam shuffled forward, you placed your hands on his shoulders as you lowered yourself behind him. The was your first time letting someone else steer Tìfrrpay, but you weren’t as nervous as you thought you’d be. You allowed yourself to relax, wrapping your arms around Neteyam’s waist, resting your head on his back, Neteyam stiffened at the movement. He couldn’t feel you around him, but he felt the pressure of you on him. You fought to keep your eyes open, turning your head up, resting your head on his shoulder now, looking up at the constellations.
You started telling him about the constellations, and Neteyam would hum and ask questions periodically. Your arms would move as you told the stories of the first ikran and rider, their bond so strong Eywa eternalized them in the stars, or the doomed lovers, two young Na’vi that were forced apart my their different clans, never to be, so they chose to be reborn as stars to be together forever.
You wondered if you’d become a star.
Neteyam slowed as you approached a fishing village. Once coming to a complete stop Neteyam lent you his hand to hold as you slid off Tìfrrpay. The Olo'eyktan was a boy not much older than you, “I see you.” He spoke, bowing slightly, you mimicked his movement, “I see you,” you looked up to Neteyam, who was looking between you and the Olo'eyktan, you nodded for him to join you, “I only ask that you allow me, and this spirit that I’m guiding, residence for the night.”
The Olo'eyktan thought for a moment, the elders whispering to him. You heard a thump behind you, turning your head to find Neteyam standing close behind you; like something, or someone, was going to attack. Finally the Olo'eyktan spoke up, the elders going back to their places, “You can stay for tonight.” You bowed once more, and he began to show you and Neteyam to your hut.
The young leader stopped at the front of the hut, opening it for you. Neteyam went in first, brushing past the Olo'eyktan, lightly bumping him. Before you could enter, the Olo'eyktan stopped you, “Let me know if there’s anything you need.” You nodded, “Thank you.” And finally entered the hut, meeting with an agitated Neteyam.
“What is the matter?” You asked, walking around him, “Nothing.” He replied, crossing his arms, “It is obviously not ‘nothing’. You are pouting like a baby.” You reach to caress his cheek, but Neteyam swatted your hand away, stepping back a few feet. You tilted your head, his agitation infecting you, “Well if you won’t tell me, then it’s best to sleep.”
If there was one thing Neteyam’s father drilled into his brain was never to go to sleep angry with your mate. Not that you two were mates. But you were still, somewhat, agitated with each other. “Do you know him?” Neteyam questioned, “Only from when I guide spirits.” You answered honestly, “You haven’t seen him… romantically…?” Neteyam asked, voice quiet, ashamed almost. “No,” Neteyam’s… heart? Ghost heart? Something leaped in his chest. “Why, are you jealous?” You teased, “What? No!” He got defensive, plopping on his futon. “Wow, only a few days together and you’re jealous when a living Na’vi formally discuses with me.” You sat beside him, nudging him with your shoulder.
Neteyam had his head turned away from you. He wasn’t sure if his cheeks would show the flush he’s feeling, “It’s like you said, we should get some rest.” Neteyam mumbled, you huffed, standing and walking to your futon. Instantly Neteyam missed the pressure of you, it wasn’t like the invisible weight his father placed on him, but instead a grounding, almost loving, pressure that reminds him that he’s there, even in he isn’t there.
— Day 5 —
Just as you told the Olo'eyktan, you and Neteyam left in the morning. You two left before the village woke, only a few older Na’vi were awake, positioned around holes made in the ice for fishing, you waved as you passed them.
——
Just like all the other journeys, the closing of the mountains signalled that the task was coming to an end. But he wasnt just a task was he? Not like the others. Where all they wanted to do was get back to their loved ones. But not Neteyam. He was willing to learn your ways, not begging to be returned at this moment.
It was selfish of you to think, but you wanted him to stay. Beg Eywa to help him, to bring him back to life.
But it could never happen. Eywa isn’t that merciful. You turned your head to look back to Neteyam, heart heavy. Even if he did have life brought back to him, he’d never be able to find the snowy mountains. He just appeared in the forest, it’d take him his whole life time to find you. And you couldn’t do that to him.
But Neteyam’s more than willing to do that for you. To find you. To spend the life he would’ve, should’ve, had, with you.
You stayed in a comfortable silence, only Tìfrrpay grumbling every so often. You were lucky it was the winter season, all the predators were hibernating.
You spent the night travelling, Tìfrrpay slowed his pace, but that wasn’t what made your stomach tie in knots. It was Neteyam’s wrapped loosely around you as his whole torso and chest pressed up against you, his head on your shoulder as he slept peacefully.
You didn’t dare move, in fear of waking the sleeping spirit. You only nudged him awake as you drew closer to the base of the mountains. Neteyam stretched out, yawning, “Sleep well?” You asked, “It was nice.” He replied, placing his hands gently back on your hips.
You continued your way, making small conversations.
— Day 6 —
You had finally made it to the base of the mountain, the roots of the spirit tree crawling in and out of the mountains and through the ice below you.
You hopped off Tìfrrpay, patting his side. “We head up by foot.” You informed Neteyam, he nodded, squinting and looking up to the great spirit tree.
“It’s huge!” He exclaimed, bending backwards to try and catch a glimpse at the top of the tree. “Are you ready?” You motioned as you started to climb up a root, Neteyam close behind.
You weren’t sure when it happened but Neteyam was call out to you from a higher branch, “You coming slow-poke?” You stared up at him for a moment, then remembered, he’s a forest Na’vi. You began to climb faster.
An unspoken competition had began between you two, who could climb the tree faster? Neteyam was practically flying up the tree, you tried to keep up with him. You were both laughing, and what Neteyam called ‘trash talking’. Until you lost your grip on an icy branch, you were falling fast, trying to grip another branch.
You thought you were done for. Is this when you join Eywa? Your mother? Stay forever with Neteyam?
Before you could think any further, a strong hand gripped your forearm. You quickly looked up to find Neteyam had caught you. He quickly pulled you up, you landed on the thick branch with a thud, catching your breath.
“Thank you…” you spoke quietly, finally trying to stand, Neteyam beat you to it. He placed one hand on your waist, the other hand bracing your elbow. “Don’t thank me yet.” You two were close together once again, but once again, you didn’t dare look at him. Instead you looked up, pointing to a small platform just above. There were many small platforms like that scattered around the tree.
“Maybe we should go slower.” Neteyam stated, a smile growing on his face. He gently took your hand, guiding you back to continue to climb the tree, once you got a grip, you started to climb, Neteyam stayed beneath you incase you fell again.
You managed to make it to the platform, sighing in relief as you reached the solid land. Vines and icicles bent down, reaching you. Neteyam looked around in awe, the vines emitting a soft blue light, reflecting off the icicles. But even with the amazing sight before him, Neteyam’s eyes still found their way to you, how you weaved in and out of the vines, your gentle touch.
“So this is it.” You broke Neteyam out of his thoughts, your words processing in his head, “The end…” his voice lowered, following around you, hand brushing the vines. “You’ll be reconnected with Eywa, with your people.” You tried to reassure him, even though your heart was hurting.
“What if… I didn’t want to go back?” He spoke slowly, stepping in front of you. “You have to. You can’t stay here.” But you wanted Neteyam to stay, it was selfish, you knew that. But you needed to complete your duty, and your duty is to guide spirits, not get attached to them.
“Isn’t it my choice?” Neteyam’s hands stayed at his side, fighting to not reach out to you, “Not really,” you finally cracked a small smile, “Eywa always claims her children in the end.” You reached for his kuru, he didn’t stop you. “What will happen to me?” He asked, voice showing concern. “Close your eyes and relax. Once you open your eyes you’ll be back in the spirit realm.” You reached up for the vines, grabbing a few and bringing them down to Neteyam’s kuru.
He placed his hand over yours, stopping you from going further, “I don’t want to go.” You finally looked into his eyes, the gold accents shining. “I don’t want you to go either. But you have to.” All Neteyam concerned himself with was his beautiful you looked in this light. The pale skin you were casted out for practically glowing, different colours being accented from the light in the tree. He just wanted to climb down the tree and stay forever with you.
He didn’t hesitate, he stepped closer to you, the tension thick even Eywa could feel it. There was no denying it this time, no avoiding like you’ve been for the past days. Finally, you leaned into him, pressing your lips against his. Neteyam’s eyes fluttered close, pulling you closer to him, but he couldn’t feel anything, but oh Eywa he wish he could.
In a split moment you connected Neteyam’s kuru to the Spirit Trees vines. Neteyam kept his eyes close as you pulled away, he started to shine a light blue, turning transparent. A bright flash appeared, and just like that, Neteyam was gone.
You felt the loneliness hit you like an avalanche.
You’d miss the spirit of the boy that you’d grown attached to despite the rules…
Your journey home was one of sadness, you sang of sorrow and to Eywa, begging her to guide Neteyam home.
That you two would find each other in the after life…
——
Neteyam opened his eyes once more, but it wasn’t the spirit . Tried to breathe, but he couldn’t. He felt like he was drowning. He fought, his wrists and ankles tied. He managed to break his binds.
He swam to the surface. It was night. There was no Na’vi to be seen.
There was no witness to see that the eldest son of Toruk Makto has risen.
There was only one thing on the boys mind:
You.
——————————————————————————
Have a great morning/day/night!!
