私が守るから

"This heart will never　ｌｏｖｅ　another again, 　　　　　　this girl will never　ｌｉｖｅ　again.”

Only simple thoughts running through her mind as she tore open two food packages. The hat still resting upon her head loosely, she stared at her hand. Families too poor to feed their children would cook up a giant pot of stew using rat poison so they could die all at once. Not having the luxury of such chemicals, the closest thing that she could find were the tiny berries now resting in her palms. 

She made sure to only place the venom in one of the pouches before shaking it in order to achieve a proper consistency that would not be susceptible to question. Hearing footsteps, she turned her attention to Tojo-san, who was carrying bottles of water. She wanted to ensure that she would have enough to survive on her own. Unlike herself, the other girl was very capable. Strong.

‘In order for you to win, I will inevitably have to die.’

We talked about our future when we sat down to eat. I tried my best to act enthusiastic for you. I did not want to leave you with tears. I wanted you to retain only happy memories of our short time spent together. How dearly I would miss you, but I would watch over you after I joined with the others. I would hope that my presence will no longer burden you after today, because you gave to me the most important gift I have ever received.

For you gave me the love, the care and the support that I never had. Traces of my humanity scrapped together and sewn with the red string of fate. Our string of fate that would be cut short. How I dearly wished to hold you tight in my arms forever and never let you go. But it was my time. I had made my decision. I could not back out.

”Ｔｈａｎｋ　ｙｏｕ．” 　　　　　”Ｔｈａｎｋ　ｙｏｕ，　ｍｙ　ｄｅａｒ　Ｅｌｉｃｈｉ．”

　　　”Ｔｈａｎｋ　ｙｏｕ　ｓｏ　ｍｕｃｈ．”

Words that I would say, that you would never know the meaning of until you woke up the next morning and found my dead body lying in your lap, your name being the last thing that I would ever speak again. I asked you if you would let me taste the strawberries again. Reluctant to comply, but I managed to catch you off guard. I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing out from my eyes.

So I hid in your arms. You asked if I was crying. I shook my head.       “They are not tears of sadness,” I would say, over and over.

You seemed confused at first, but you nodded your head, bringing your lips to meet mine. For the very last time, I would get to feel your embrace. I would, quite literally, be dying in your arms. No weapons, no bones, no gore. Nothing. I would die peacefully. Entering the games, I had already known my fate. To survive to this long was my only plea, because I would get to spend more time with you.

But now is my time to leave. I have to find who I have been chasing after. You wouldn’t blame me, would you? I know that my actions were a bit rash - Uncalled for, undecided by the two of us. But I knew that you would try to preserve this life that is no longer worth living, this life that perhaps never lived until it met you.

We spent the night talking. We did not sleep, for you feared the danger of the debris of the landslide. I would speak, smile, laugh like nothing was wrong. As if I did not know that this were the last human relation I would ever have. Perhaps you would join me, someday long from now. I would be waiting for you. Forever. And yet I would never wish that demise upon you.

Eventually, I ended up resting in your lap. I felt my undying breath come to a slew as my body felt constricted. I was losing consciousness. Reaching up to touch your face just one last time,  “さようなら,  愛してる.”        “Ｇｏｏｄｂｙｅ，　Ｉ　ｌｏｖｅ　ｙｏｕ．”

Looking at me with simply confused eyes, but I knew that your brain slowly pieced the puzzle together. The beat of your heart accelerated while mine decelerated, and we became a perfect pair of equilibrium once more. For the last time. The embodiment of your anger seemed to crumble and break upon the reality of the situation. For you simply could not be mad.

“I love you too, idiot.”

The very last words that I heard. I removed the crown from the grassy floors, reaching to place it atop your head, the tears no longer feigning happiness. Gripping your hands, vision tunnel closing as my vitals began to burst from the inside. I threw up blood. A lot of it. I never knew if I had succeeded in placing the skull properly. I closed my eyes. They would never open again.

“ｍｙ　ｗｉｆｅ，　ｍｙ　ｑｕｅｅｎ， 　　　　you will　ｆｉｇｈｔ，and you will    ｗｉｎ． ｉ　ｌｏｖｅ　ｙｏｕ．　                        ｔｏ　ｔｈｅ　ｍｏｏｎ　ａｎｄ　ｂａｃｋ．”

My voice cracking, struggling to make my last words meaningful.      “Our ｐａｔｈｓ shall ｉｎｔｅｒｓｅｃｔ once more, 　　　　　　　　　　　　ｗｏｒｒｙ　ｎｏｔ，　ｅｌｉｃｈｉ．”

Did the canon fire, she knew not, but she knew that it was over. The strife, the struggle, the misery was all complete. She would never live to turn 18. But she would watch from the skies above, the finale of the games. And they would meet again, in a world far away from this dystopia. When or where, she did not know. But she knew for sure. One life ends, another begins.                        And the bonds that we tied too tight burst a seam.

And there, still remaining at the oak tree, the presence that laid eyes upon the newspaper simultaneously disappeared, leaving the newspaper flowing to the ground. The headline accompanied with a picture of the stoic expression of Ayase-san, “We will remember.”

Sent off to the river to retrieve water while Tojo-san stood guard of their tent and supplies. Life like this was not very foreign to her. She spent most of her life retrieving water to a home that did not have a functioning hydro system. Letting a quiet yawn escape her lips, her descent down the strange slopes of grass began with a push and a shove.

Following the sound of running water, she peaks above the grass to ensure that she was alone. Indeed, she was, other than another tribute who was resting a little too peacefully in a sleeping bag, carefully camouflaged using branches and bushes. It was too bad that his snoring completely gave her away. Nonetheless, they were not the reason she was here. She was here because she needed water.

Holding only two daggers and a blowgun with 24 darts, her precision either had to be perfect, or she would have to be extremely silent. She was going to go with the latter. Moving quickly, she removed the bottles from her bag and brought them to the river to fill them up. She had almost made it. Made it without a need for another fight. 

Snap.

Initially, their roles had been inverse. The female had the upper hand, being both taller and stronger than her. She must have still be groggy from her sleep, because the knives that she threw at her simply grazed her cheek, some of them aimed so far off that they landed into the river. Dropping her water bottles to the ground, she narrowed her eyes and ran directly towards her, a blade in her hand.

She drove it directly into her side. She did not die immediately, rather, sputtered up blood, fluid dripping from her lips as she fell to her feet. Begging her not to kill her. Apologizing for attacking her, admitting that she should have just let her be. That she lacked the ability to survive in the first place, and that she should give her an open path to walk. 

“So, tell me, why is this bleak world worth saving?”       She did not respond.

The answer to that question, even herself, she knew not, but she was tired of seeing the female suffer with a single punctured lung, a gift from one of her daggers. She wondered if she should be kind and put her out of her misery. But watching her writhe on the floor, hasty attempts to stand up on her feet only for a dart to be shot into the back of her knee.

“I shall spare you from your misery.”                                                                                 “...Please.”

Lacking sympathy. She walked towards her sleeping bag. She would use her own sword to kill her. She would fall victim to her own weapon. That weapon that she had ran for her dear life to get. What she risked her life for, and whats she would die to. Still trying to get away, crawling on her knees. Giving the girl a wry smile, she drove it through her back, the blade destroying her internals. 

She passed out. Perhaps due to the pain. Perhaps because she was dead. She was not sure, but there was one way to find out her answer for certain. Foolproof. Never susceptible to a failure. She dug into the other girl’s chest with the blade, struggling to break the ribs protecting the vitals. Pushing back the flesh, there laid a heart that ceased to beat. 

The canon fired. 

“Eternal gratification, I have given to you. And you shall now repay me.”

Rest of the time of that afternoon spent severing his head from the rest of her body, returning that to her sleeping bag. She smashed the skull into two, splitting the bottom from the top. Removing the eyes and the brain, she placed those into the bag as well. Her hands were probably now stained with a permanent red color.  She zipped the bag up, setting it adrift in the river. The hovercraft should have fun tracking that down. 

Scraping the flesh off of the top half of the broken skull, she washed off the blood and remaining tissue in the river, drying it off in the grass. She now had her own makeshift helmet carved out of the bones of her victim. Humming a quiet tune before gathering the containers of water and returning them to her knapsack, she makes a cheerful hike up the terrain.

“Protect me as I did you.”

Alliance: Tojo, Eli. Ayase, Nozomi. Partial alliance: Yarrow, Ecthelion.

Current condition. Ayase: Decent. Minor injury to left shoulder and right knee. Tojo: Well. Minor abrasions.

Current weapons.

Spear [dual edged] x 1 (used by ayase)

Axe [basic] x 1 

Sword x 2 (used by tojo)

Daggers x 4 

Backpack count: 4 [one unopened]

Current supplies.

tent x 1

blanket x 1

dried food packages x 10

water bottle x 2 

canteen x 1

small knife x 1

first aid kit x 1

darts x 24

blowgun x 1

ice axe (small) x 4

matches (pack of 12) x 1